Chapter 7
When Hana woke up, she was laying on a hospital bed, she knew that it was a hospital because of the repeated beeping from the machine next to the bed. Looking around the room she found both Yukio and Rin fast asleep on either side of the bed. Off in one corner of the room was the emergency bag, that Hana had put together after her fourth or fifth trip to the hospital, with an extremely high fever. It also came in handy when Rin was admitted after his suicide attempt. It was then that she noticed that she had bandages wrapped around her wrists. Hana knew what cutting did to a person but it was the only way she could let go of her stress while trying her hardest to keep anything that she ate down. Hana knew she shouldn't have been doing that after everything that had happened with Rin, but being cut off from her family, her way of life, that was harder than suffering under the maltreatment of Erin O'Connor. Hana was about to pull the bandages off of her wrists when two sets of hands stopped her. She had been so deep in her own thoughts that she didn't notice her brothers waking up, at the increasing of her heart rate. Right away Rin went to work on calming their sister down while Yukio went to inform a doctor that Hana had woken up after four days of fighting an extremely high fever.
"Shh, Bean calm down…look at me, bean that's it just looks at me." Rin said holding Hana's hands in one hand while holding her chin with the other. It took Hana a few minutes to realize that she had just been in a state of panic, but she couldn't understand why she couldn't calm down. Hana could feel her heart in her throat, which was making it hard to breathe. But when Rin locked eyes with Hana, she was actually able to focus on something other than what she was feeling. But this was all short lived as the doctors pushed Rin out of the way so they could flash a light in her eyes. This actually set Hana off again and if not for the fact that she had just woken up after four days with an extremely high fever she would have punched the doctor in the nose, since Hana was a young child she had always been sensitive to light, the doctors when she had been young, often said that was because Hana loved to hide in dark places so this would later affect her eyesight. It took both Yukio and Rin to pull the doctor way from Hana as she started to pull the sensors off of her chest and forehead, and she would have pulled the IV out too if not for the fact that Rin grabbed her hand before pulling her into his arms, trying his hardest to hold Hana thrashing form in one place; so that she could not do any more harm to herself.
"While your sister doesn't seem to have any brain damage…but I do highly recommend that you have her admitted to a mental hospital." The doctor said coming to stand next to Yukio, who looked like he was about to kill the doctor.
"Why because you flashed a light in the eyes of my light sensitive little sister. Hana needs help but you are only making it worse. She is a 12-year-old girl that is having a hard time. Instead of judging her you should be helping her." Yukio yelled at the doctor while pushing him towards the door. It was then that a different doctor entered the room, a clip board in their hands. Hana was crying on her brother's lap slowly rocking back and forth, while Rin was trying to get her to calm down. So far, he was not having much success, but then again, her brother had never been much of a quitter.
"Dr. Tanaka, didn't I tell you to inform me when Hana Okumura woke up?" The second doctor said pushing past Yukio and the first doctor, before putting the clip board that he was carrying on the foot of the bed. He then moved to get a better look at her.
"Yes, sir but you were with a different patient and I had been told not to bother you with such a trivial matter…" The first doctor said before having to dodge the clip board that the second doctor whom Hana remembered as her childhood doctor Dr. Aoki, he had been very kind to Hana growing up even when she would throw a fit over something trivial. Hana could tell that Dr. Aoki was not happy that one of his oldest patients had been called a trivial matter.
"I will have your head, Ken Tanaka…to call one of my favorite patients a 'trivial matter' is not appropriate in any way. You are a disgrace to your oath. Hana what has he done to you?" Dr. Aoki said letting his anger get the better of him before turning to her with a concern look on his faced. Hana looked between her brothers and Dr. Aiko trying to figure out what she ought to say, when she caught sight of the first Doctor and the smug look on his face.
"Dr. Tanaka pushed Rin out of the way while he was trying to get me to calm down. He then proceeded to shine a light in my eyes, which sets me off. And while Rin was trying to get me to stop thrashing, Dr. Tanaka told Yukio that he highly recommended that I be admitted to a mental hospital. I'm sure that you heard what Yukio said to Dr. Tanaka." Hana said pointing at the man and the damage she had done to the wires on the bed. It was then that Rin covered her ears with his hands while forcing Hana to face his chest. Not wanting for her to see what was about to happen. This was before someone put a hand on her head, making Hana look up and around her shoulder at her doctor.
"Rin I am going to step out in the hallway to have a word with Dr. Tanaka. Yukio can I trust you to reattach the sensors to your sister's chest or should I sent in a nurse?" Dr. Aiko said smiling at her and her brothers. Right away Hana cut off Yukio, she might have been their little sister but that didn't mean she wanted them to see her without a shirt on.
"No…out with you two and send in a nurse." Hana said throwing herself at the pillows behind her and Rin, trying to hide the fact that she was embarrassed about this situation. Hana could hear her brothers chuckling at the fact that her ears were most likely red at the moment, but she was happy that they hadn't said anything. It took a nurse a few minutes to reattached all the sensors to Hana's chest and forehead, but when she was about to leave the nurse noticed the bandages wrapped around Hana's wrists were starting to turn red.
"Oh, my it seems you have pulled a few of your stitches." The nurse said sitting next to Hana on the bed. It took the nurse a few minutes to unwrap the bandage around Hana's wrists, but the look on the nurse's face when she saw her wrists was quite confusing to Hana.
"I should get Dr. Aiko. Do you want me to get your brothers while I'm at it?" The nurse said before getting up from the edge of her hospital bed. Hana nodded her head, before pulling her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around her knees. Tears running down her cheeks. Hana was scared, that her brothers would want anything to do with her. If she had been in her room either back at the abandoned boy's dorm or in Ireland, she would have dugout the knife hidden under her mattress to carve out more of her skin. But that thought was short lived when both Rin and Yukio rushed into the room, both concerned.
"Hana are you okay?" Rin asked grabbing her hands. The look in their eyes was the same as two years ago when her dad and Yukio arrived at the hospital.
"I'm so sorry…I know I shouldn't have but it was the better evil then the maltreatment I faced from Erin O'Connor. The open wounds were caused by my claws when I was in the closet, but I swear I didn't mean to." Hana said crying in Rin's arms.
"We know bean, Amelia told us everything. Stress can be a dangerous thing." Rin said running his hand over her hair, trying to provide her some comfort, but at the moment Hana's brain was going every which way. It was only when her brothers started singing did her mind calm down and focus again.
"I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the, Lord
But you don't really care for music, do ya?
Well it goes like this: the fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, hmm
Well, your faith was strong, but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew ya
She tied you to the kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Well baby, I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew ya
And I've seen your flag on the marble arch
And love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Well, maybe there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya
And it's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who has seen the Light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah." Rin sang while rocking the clearly distressed girl in his arms. After a few minutes Hana finally calmed down, yet her tears were still rolling down her cheeks. It was during this time that Dr. Aiko and the nurse from before entered the room, waiting for the best possible opportunity to help Hana.
"That was just wonderful Rin, and Hana you are still as beautiful a singer as two years ago." Dr. Aiko said moving to stand at the foot of the hospital bed, a tray in his hands. That was when both Rin and Yukio looked down at their sister confused, they would normally have heard Hana if she had been singing because her voice was beautiful.
"You boys don't believe me when I say that Hanako was singing, but something you two don't know is that when Hana is scared, she sings softer because she's trying to calm herself down." Dr. Aiko said moving to put the tray that he was holding down on the table next to the hospital bed, before snapping the plastic gloves that the nurse had handed him over his hands.
"Now that everyone has calmed down, Hanako we better get your wrists fixed, especially if you want to go home later today." Dr. Aiko said before moving to get a better look at her wrists, the cuts were not bleeding but the thought of them sewing her up was scary to Hana, now don't get her wrong Hana was not a fan of pain, but because of her hyper metabolism most pain medication only gave her a temporary relief. It was then that Rin tightened his grip on his sister trying to provide comfort to her, even though he was concerned about her leaving the hospital so soon after waking up from her fever.
"Do you really think that a good idea…I mean Rin was put in the psych ward, after his suicide attempt. Shouldn't Hana be put under observation or something?" Yukio asked clearly confused about Dr. Aiko's decision, and Hana could see where Yukio was coming from, but Hana was not suicidal.
"I'm not suicidal…I'm a cutter yes, but that's because of stress. If you however think I need to be admitted because you are worried than just say so Yukio." Hana said settling in her spot-on Rin's lap. It was then that Rin stepped up and said something Hana was not expecting.
"Yukio, putting Hana on observation or in the psych ward, will do nothing for her. I know better than anyone, that's why I want to get her on medication and into therapy to help her work through this. If that doesn't work for you, wait until after Dr. Aiko has finished Hana's stitches. Then we can speak out in the hallway." Rin said looking up at their brother with the same defiance that he would give their father. Hana was watching the imaginary battle going on between her brothers, not even paying attention to the fact that Dr. Aiko and his nurse were quickly sewing up the cuts on her wrists.
"Okay boys that's enough…Ema do you mind sitting with Hanako while I talk over the options with her brothers out in the hallway." Dr. Aiko said clapping his hands to draw the twin's attention away from each other. Rin actually handed her over to the nurse, who was happy to be holding her. The nurse actually had the gall to nuzzle up against her head. Hana was about to push her away when the nurse sat her back down on the bed, smiling sadly at her.
"You know that it's not good to be cutting, right Hanako?" The nurse asked taking Hana's hands into her own. Right away Hana could tell that the nurse was clearly concerned for her well-being, the nurse wasn't being contradictory, just genuinely worried.
"I know, but out of the two evils this was the less of the two. For over half a year I was in Ireland, during that time my dad died, and I was cut off from my family and way of life. I was forced to live out in a barn because I did better than my teacher's favorite son. So, I took to cutting to deal with my stress…" Hana said telling the nurse everything that had happened until she just broke down crying. The nurse wrapped her arms around Hana and held on tight. It was close to fifteen minutes before her brothers entered the room, Dr. Aiko not that far behind them.
"Okay, Hanako we are going to start you on medication and therapy but if your symptoms start to get worse, we might have to admit you to the psych ward…" Dr. Aiko said before the nurse cut him off.
"Dr.Aiko can I speak with you and the twins out in the hallway; there is more to this than you think." The nurse said patting Hana's knee. And Hana was actually grateful that the nurse was trying to help her. Hana was wiping away her leftover tears when Rin reached out to pat her head trying to give Hana some much needed courage. It took them several minutes to talk over everything and the different options this revelation brought forth. The outcome was still grim in Hana's mind, but after getting everything off her chest it was enough to make her feel better.
"Okay Hanako, so after hearing everything that you have told Ema. I truly believe that the best option would be to have you at home with your family…on the condition that you say if you still feel like hurting yourself, you can let either Rin or Yukio know, but no one is going to force you to do anything. And when I see you again in a few weeks, if you still feel that need, we might start you on medication and therapy. How does that sound to you Hanako?" Dr. Aiko said putting his hands behind his back like he always did when he was hiding a lollipop. Hana had to resist the urge to pout at the fact the man was still treating her like a child. But at the same time Hana was hopeful that Dr. Aiko remembered that she liked certain flavors. Hana knows that if she didn't say anything her treat would never be given.
"Yes, sir. I understand." Hana said nodding her head in agreement. The need to hurt herself was much weaker but it was still at the back of her mind. What really mattered to Hana was the fact that her brothers and Dr. Aiko were going to give her a little trust and revisit the issue at a later date.
"Good now if I remember correctly, you like the…cherry lollipops that I give to my patients." Dr. Aiko said handing Hana the red lollipop from behind his back, causing both Rin and Yukio to start laughing at the look of disgust of their sister's face. Hana hated cherry, she preferred the grape or green apple.
"Dr. Aiko don't tease Hanako too much. Here Hanako these are for you, and your brothers. Now excuse me as I kick these three out so you can get dressed." The nurse said handing her a bag full of lollipops, before kicking her brothers and her doctor out of the room. The process to remove all the sensors and IV took Hana longer than she thought but at the same time she was happy to be going home.
"All done Hanako…let me go see if Dr. Aiko has your paperwork finished." The nurse said as she pulled on her hoodie, over Rin's T-shirt and jeans. Luckily before leaving for Ireland Hana had updated her undergarments inside the emergency bag. Her clothes on the other hand were far too inappropriate to wear on the subway or bus back to the abandoned boy's dorm. Her father had put a baby pink pair of shorts and an oversized blue T-shirt inside the bag, even though she had told him that the colors clashed. Sometimes Hana was sure that all the hits to her father's head might have made him color blind.
"Hey bean…are those my clothes or Yukio's?" Rin asked coming into the room, a thick packet of paper tucked under his arm. Hana looked up at her brother with one eyebrow raised, was he really that dense.
"Yukio is taller than either of us…so Rin do you think I could wear his clothes?" Hana said leaning forward so that she was leaning her elbows against her knees. Rin chuckled before taking a seat next to her on the hospital bed. Rin wrapped his arm around her shoulder before pulling her hair brush out of the bag sitting behind them on the bed.
"Good point Bean. Now hold still while I brush your hair." Rin said turning Hana's head so that he could start brushing her hair. Her hair was far too tangled for him to do much of anything, but like Hana had said before her brother had never been a quitter. After a few minutes and pulling her hair out of her skull, Rin was able to pull her hair into a ponytail. That was before Rin reached into their emergency bag and pulled out her baseball hat. Knowing that her hair was going to need more time to detangled then we had. Hospital had a quick turn out rate when new rooms became available for patients. They didn't care if a patient was still getting changed, they would kick someone out of a room in a heartbeat.
"Rin why is our sister wearing your clothes?" Yukio asked coming into the room, carrying a thicker packet of paperwork and a small brown paper bag. Hana raised an eyebrow at their brother before pulling the lollipop out of her mouth.
"Dad put a bright pink top and a pair of baby blue shorts in the bag for me. I not sure about you Yukio but I would not be caught dead in that combination. Any more questions?" Hana said before jumping off the bed the bag of lollipops in her hands. It was then that Dr. Aiko's nurse entered the room with a wheelchair, and although Hana hated the idea she knew the rules. The ride down to the main floor was peaceful, until they were stopped by Dr. Tanaka, carrying a box of things. The first thing he did after seeing them, was throwing something at Hana, only for Rin to be hit. The was the last thing he did, because both Rin and Yukio was pissed. It was one thing to mess with Rin, but to attack Hana was where the twins drew the line. Since Hana became their family almost ten years ago the twins had been protective of their little sister, to the point that she has been known to kick their butts.
"Dr. Tanaka I would pray to whatever god you believe in, because you are about to meet them." Hana said before pushing herself out of the wheelchair and onto her feet. An evil smirk on her lips, to tell the truth as Hana had grown older, she had become just as protective of her brothers as they had been of her. Hana was about to pull her spear charm off of her wrist when she noticed the silver chain was missing. She looked over at her brothers to see that Yukio was holding it in his hand.
"Yukio give me the bracelet now." Hana said softly holding out her hand towards her brother, her eyebrow twitching at her irritation. Hana couldn't tell if her irritation was at the Dr. or at her brothers, for taking her only form of protection. That was before Yukio put the silver chain in her hand, along with the pocketknife she had hidden under her bed. The look of disbelief she shoots at her brothers was enough to send Rin into a fit of laughter.
"Bean we searched your room after finding out you had been cutting." Rin said through his fit of laughter, before wrapping his arms around her shoulders, while nuzzling the top of her head with his cheek. Hana relaxed in her brother's embrace, letting the pocketknife and bracelet fall to the floor at her feet. Hana turned around in her brother's embrace and just started crying.
"Everything is going to be alright Bean." Rin said running his hands over her back. They stood like that for a few minutes before the nurse that had been with them cleared her throat, before pointing at the wheelchair in front of her. The rest of the trip down to the hospital lobby was quiet and peaceful, to the point that Hana fell asleep holding onto Rin's hand.