Jud

Jud did let go of her when she stopped crying. He knew he didn't have to, that it would be easy to lie and say he'd fallen asleep before her, but that wouldn't be right. She was so soft and fragile in his arms, he had no choice but to do what she asked, to treat her like a good girl, an innocent girl.

He extracted himself from under her, partly hoping she'd wake up and beg him to stay. But all she did was settle back down into the bed and mumble something in her sleep. He slipped into the bedroll and shifted uncomfortably, almost wishing he were in the privacy of the smokehouse so he could deal with his throbbing erection. He somewhat relieved the agony by unzipping his pants–too slowly for Laurey to hear–and taking his cock out. Sleep eventually came to him, filled with dreams of her.

For what seemed like the first time in his life, he woke up with a smile on his face. Woke to the sight of Laurey's room, the room she'd asked him to share with her. He tucked himself back in his jeans and got up with a stretch.

He wanted to stay with her, but he couldn't be sure when Aunt Eller would be coming back, and his presence in her bedroom in the morning would raise more questions than he'd care to answer. Even if he was able to get out the story of the attempted rape without Aunt Eller's shooting him or hanging him, there was no way to properly explain spending the night in Laurey's room. The fact that she'd asked him would be meaningless. In Aunt Eller's eyes, a grown man like him shouldn't take advantage of a girl like her, should leave her alone, even if she was in pain and needed him.

He stared at Laurey; she was curled up in a tight ball, hair splayed out on her pillow, bedsheets twisted around her. He wanted to reach out and stroke her hair or her forehead, but that would startle her if she wasn't expecting it. He tried to figure out the best way of waking her without yanking her out of her dreams too hard and eventually, he decided to stand as far from the bed as possible and say, "Hey, Laurey" in as quiet a voice as he could manage.

"Mmmh?" She opened her eyes and looked at him levelly, quelling his fear that she'd wake up not remembering what had happened and what he had done for her, that the sight of him in her room would make her scream before she could remember the reason he was there. She sat up and hugged her knees to her chest.

"Uh, I, uh, I was gonna go out and start work. But if you need me to, I can stay here with you, or you can come out with me."

"I'll think I'll be okay on my own." Her voice was back to normal, not all trembly and sweet like it had been the night before. The imperious tone was back in her voice, the tone that always reminded him he was just the hired hand.

"'Course." He gathered up the bedroll, wondering if what he had done made any difference at all, or if everything would go back to the way it had been before. Maybe if he had kissed her, maybe if he had just let those men hold her down and took her himself…

"Where're you gonna be? 'Case I…need you for anythin'?" Well, maybe things weren't completely back to normal.

"'Round the orchard. You holler if you need me and I'll come right over."

"What kinda pie do you like best?"

"What kinda pie? Pumpkin, I 'spose."

"I mean, somethin' that's in season now. Gonna bake you a pie later today, and I want it to be your favorite."

"Oh, right, um, then cherry. You make real good cherry pies."

"I can manage that" knees still against her chest, she smiled and ran a hand through her hair, a pose he'd seen in dozens of French postcards, but never in real life. "It'll take a while, so you can have it for dessert, and I won't even let Aunt Eller have a single bite."

"You'd make the whole thing just for me?"

She nodded. "Of course. It's the least I could do, you know that."

"Right. That's…that's awful nice of you, Laurey" he nodded and left the room, smiling so hard his face ached.