Chapter 20

"And you think she'll help me?" Rilla asks dubiously as she eyes the office door in front of them.

Shirley, standing behind her in the corridor on the second floor of Queen's main building, shrugs in response. "I'm not making promises, but if anyone will, it's her."

"I haven't had classes with her yet," Rilla points out. Knowing her brother to have an analytical mind, she's prepared to trust his assessment, but at the same time, she can't see why this teacher should help her, a complete stranger.

"She mostly teaches second years," Shirley explains. "She's very intelligent and has a wide knowledge. We've had a few interesting conversations outside of lessons. I think she's a bit of an outsider among the other teachers though."

"Why?" asks Rilla, wondering whether this constitutes good news or not.

"She keeps to herself a lot," replies her brother. "Rumour has it she has a fiancé at the front, but…" He trails off with another shrug, both to indicate that rumours cannot always be believed and that he himself has never been a friend of the gossip so rife in other circles, especially at home in the Glen.

"If she has, I feel for her," Rilla states. "I hope he comes back." The pain of losing a brother is still fresh to her and she can't imagine the pain of losing a fiancé.

Shirley nods his agreement, before indicating the door with a motion of his head. "Shall we?"

Rilla squares her shoulders, then nods. "Yes, let's give it a try."

Raising his hand, Shirley knocks on the door, just loud enough to be heard without being obnoxious. A moment passes, before a voice can be heard from the inside, calling for them to come in.

Shirley goes first, holding the door open for Rilla to pass through. Inside, there's a small, cluttered office, with books and papers covering most available surfaces. At first glance, it gives off the impression of chaos, but as Rilla quickly allows her eyes to take in the room, she thinks that there's order behind the way those stacks of books and piles of papers are arranged.

In the middle of a room is a desk, of the kind that all teachers at Queen's use, and behind it sits a woman whom Rilla estimates to be in her late twenties. She isn't conventionally pretty, but she has striking, intelligent eyes, and masses of black hair. There's also something about her that Rilla can't quite pinpoint, an aura of mystery and, she thinks, sadness.

"Mr Blythe," the woman greets Shirley, standing up from her chair. "What a pleasant surprise."

"Good morning, Miss Oliver," Shirley replies politely. "May I introduce my sister, Miss Rilla Blythe?"

Miss Oliver turns her eyes on Rilla. "Indeed. Miss Blythe. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

There's something searching about the older woman's eyes, something knowing even, that makes Rilla feel uncomfortable, but she tries not to let it show. Raising her chin, she instead meets her gaze. "The pleasure is mine, Miss."

"Please, sit," invites Miss Oliver and indicates two chairs standing in front of her desk. She herself sits down as well, while watching Rilla and Shirley do likewise. "How can I help you?"

Shirley casts a quick glance at Rilla, then looks back at his teacher. "My sister wants to become a lawyer."

Surprise crosses Miss Oliver's face and Rilla can't truly blame her. Quite apart from being a girl, she knows she doesn't look like someone whose plan in life is to become a lawyer. Girls like her go on to study arts or literature before finding themselves a nice husband and settling down to raise a family.

But then, girls like her also don't have babies out of wedlock, so she supposes the stereotypes only go so far.

"You want to become a lawyer?" Miss Oliver asks, now addressing Rilla, as if needing to make sure she understood correctly.

She didn't, not quite.

"No," Rilla amends carefully. "I don't want to become a lawyer. I need to become one."

Reaching into her bag standing by her feet, she pulls out the suffragist magazine, already opened to a particular page. She places the magazine on the desk between them, the small black-and-white photograph facing upwards.

Looking at them from the page, her life chronicled as part of a series about remarkable Canadian women, is Clara Brett Martin, herself the first female lawyer not only in Canada but the entire British Empire.

"A lawyer like she is," Rilla emphasises and taps a finger on the magazine. "A barrister."

Miss Oliver makes a thoughtful sound as she considers first the photograph of Clara Brett Martin, then looks up to study Rilla for a long moment. "So, you need to become a lawyer." This time, she doesn't phrase it as a question.

Rilla nods. "I do."

Another moment passes as Miss Oliver still considers her. She raises a black eyebrow, not mockingly, but with something like a challenge to her expression. "And why did you decide to come to me?"

Taken aback by the question, Rilla stills. She didn't realise it before, but encouraged by Shirley's words, she unconsciously expected Miss Oliver, upon being approached, to show support. Preposterous as that expectations might have been, that the teacher doesn't offer help immediately confuses her.

"It was my idea," Shirley interjects. "I thought you might have some advice for Rilla."

"I'm no lawyer myself," Miss Oliver points out.

"You could become one, if you wanted to," Shirley states calmly and what would be vapid flattery out of the mouth of almost anyone else, sounds perfectly sincere coming from him.

Miss Oliver laughs softly. "I have neither the money nor the connections to consider law school, Mr Blythe. I've risen as far as I can go as teacher in these hallowed halls." There's a note in her voice that Rilla can't place immediately but thinks might be sarcasm. However, it's not something she's often encountered in her life before, so she can't be sure.

"Clearly, you're in a more favourable position, Miss Blythe," continues Miss Oliver, her eyes moving back to focus on Rilla. "Why is it that you need to become a lawyer?"

Rilla, who didn't expect her motives to be questioned, swallows heavily. "I'm afraid I can't tell you that."

A smile appears on Miss Oliver's face, not unkind, but definitely challenging. "How, then, am I to tell whether you're sincere enough in your plans to warrant my help?"

It is, Rilla can't deny, an excellent question. Of course, actually answering it truthfully is out of the question, but she can see why Miss Oliver would ask it.

"I've never been so certain of anything in my life," she assures, making sure to meet the older woman's gaze. "You'll find that I'm not very clever, not like Shirley is, but I'm dedicated and I'm willing to work hard. It's true that I've never had to work hard before in my life, but when I put my mind to something, I always see it through. I can absolutely promise you that I've put my mind to do this."

Miss Oliver listens to her and appears to consider her words. "You make your case well. However, it's a long road to become a lawyer, and a thorny one at that, especially for a woman." She is, it's apparent, not convinced that Rilla has the stamina and dedication to see it through.

Likely sensing the same thing, Shirley takes it upon himself to come to his sister's aid. "She's stubborn, Miss," he assures, ignoring Rilla's indignant look. "When she says she will do something, it's impossible to sway her."

Rilla frowns at him, unsure whether his remark was insulting or supportive, or a bit of both. Then, turning to Miss Oliver, she decides that some truth is in order, at least as much as she can reveal.

"I don't know if you heard it, Miss, but our older brother was killed in action not long ago," she tells the teacher. Beneath the desktop, her nails dig into the balls of her hand, deep enough to be painful, as she fights to retain composure. "The night before he died, he wrote me a letter and made a request. I'm trying to honour his request."

"His request for you to become a lawyer," concludes Miss Oliver, understanding showing on her face.

The easiest path forward, Rilla realises immediately, would be to nod agreement and claim that yes, it was Walter's idea for her to study law and, eventually, become a barrister. From Miss Oliver's expression, it appears that it would be enough of an explanation for her, even if the disbelief briefly flickering over Shirley's face tells her that he, at least, knows better than to believe the lie.

For a lie it would be, despite how effective it would be in helping her reach her goal, and Rilla is right sick of lying.

"Not quite," she therefore corrects. She considers her next words carefully and as she does, fragments of Walter's last letter float through her mind. There's one fragment especially that refuses to let her go, instead staying with her, telling her that it must be fulfilled.

And you will tell your children of the Idea we fought and died for – teach them it must be lived for as well as died for, else the price paid for it will have been given for nought. This will be part of your work, Rilla.

This is her task, then, as given to her by her brother in his last hours among the living. She can't fail him, and thus, to find the son Walter never knew she had, suddenly becomes a part of the task he gave her. One day, she needs to tell her son about his uncle and the ideas he died for, and to tell her son, she needs to find him, and claim him.

"He requested that I relay a message to someone," she tells Miss Oliver slowly. "However, I don't know where that person is."

"And to find the person, you need to be a lawyer?" asks the teacher, now looking at Rilla intently.

"I believe so," she replies plainly. For if there's one thing that the past months have taught her, it's that few people out there are willing to help someone like her, and if no-one else will help her, she needs to learn to help herself. It makes sense to her in a way few things have, recently.

Miss Oliver considers her for a long moment, her head tilted slightly and her striking eyes focused firmly on Rilla's face. "I see."

Under her watchful gaze, Rilla can't shake the feeling that Miss Oliver does truly see, perhaps more so than Rilla ever intended her to. Most people, she's found, see only what they want to see, but Miss Oliver strikes her as someone who sees far beyond what others do, and possibly far beyond what she herself wants to see, too.

Silence settles over the room briefly as Rilla holds her breath, waiting for the teacher to react, to make a decision, perhaps to pass an absolution. Next to her, Shirley sits very still, too, and in some part of her mind, Rilla wonders, again, what he knows, or possibly guesses.

"It will take years to accomplish," Miss Oliver cautions, still studying Rilla closely. "I understand time is of importance, so the first step is to graduate from this academy in one year instead of the customary two. Then, you will have to get a BA, which normally takes four years, followed by three years as a law student. It means that even if you do well and stay dedicated to your goal, it will still likely take you eight years to achieve."

Rilla swallows heavily. She knew, in an abstract way, that to become a lawyer would be neither easy, nor quick. However, to have it spelled out to her like that still briefly takes her breath away.

Nevertheless, she raises her head and meets Miss Oliver's gaze head-on. "It doesn't matter. I need to do this, however long it takes."

"It won't be an easy path either," the teacher warns. "People will judge you and many will expect to see you fail. Some will even want you to fail, or actively try to hinder your progress. Law is still not a profession that welcomes women with open arms."

"It doesn't matter," Rilla repeats. "Whatever it takes, I'll do it."

After all, she has to find her son, no matter how long and hard the road.

Miss Oliver nods slowly and not for the first time, Rilla has a feeling that the teacher is reading her very thoughts. As if to prove her point, when Miss Oliver speaks, it's to say, "In that case, the easiest path is the one best-travelled. I suggest you make Miss Brett Martin your example to follow."

"How so?" Rilla leans forward slightly, curious.

"Due to her success, we know that Osgoode Hall Law School accepts female students, and that the Law Society of Upper Canada permits female barristers," explains Miss Oliver. "If you follow her path, it still won't be easy, but perhaps a little less difficult."

"You mean that after getting my BA, I should go to Toronto?" Rilla clarifies.

"Before that, preferably," amends Miss Oliver. "From what I know, the University of Toronto accepts female students. In theory, any BA from any college will do, but in practice, graduating from a college in Toronto might give you an edge."

Rilla nods. Miss Oliver's words make sense and while it would be glamorous to forge her own path, she understands that to reach her goal as quickly as possible, to walk in another's footsteps is the best course forward. She's not entirely sure yet how to convince her parents to allow her to go to Toronto in just a few months' time, but if she can just find a way to convince them –

She shakes her head, annoyed with herself.

It's a problem for another day and she still has time to figure it out. For now, the next step is to graduate Queen's and, preferably, do it early. Her parents graduated in one year instead of the normal two, she knows from family lore, though none of her siblings did. Di could have done it, she thinks, but preferred to keep pace with her twin. She's also certain that Shirley could have followed their parents' lead if he had decided to do so, though for reasons known only to himself, he's now in his third year.

Now, then, she must be the first child of Ingleside to accomplish this feat, because as Miss Oliver correctly surmised, time is an issue. Of course, Rilla sees the irony of her, the family's resident little fool, even trying to succeed in doing two years' worth of academic courses in half the time, but she supposes none of her siblings had a real reason to attempt it.

She, on the other hand, has reason enough.

"I'll work hard," she promises, though whether she's making the promise to Shirley, to Miss Oliver or to herself, she doesn't know. Possibly, she's promising all three of them, and her lost older brother and her son besides. "I'll work hard and I'll do my best. I'm not brilliant though, so I might… I might need some help."

"I can help you study," Shirley offers generously. "I've done most of the coursework already. I also have some essays and papers passed down from the twins that you can use –," here, he stops briefly and looks at their teacher, "– as an inspiration."

Miss Oliver, however, doesn't react to his thinly veiled suggestion that Rilla might find her sisters' essays helpful when writing her own. Instead, those striking eyes of hers remain firmly focused on Rilla herself, her expression thoughtful.

"I'm willing to tutor you after school hours," she states calmly. "You will need to be absolutely dedicated and you will need to listen to what I tell you. It will be hard work, but I think with the additional support of Mr Blythe, it can be done."

"I am dedicated!" Rilla assures her quickly. "I'll spend every evening studying if it helps. I won't travel home on weekends either. I'll stay here and learn!"

Briefly, a smile crosses Miss Oliver's features as the younger girl's enthusiasm touches something within her. Outwardly, young Miss Blythe is like all the girls that Gertrude Oliver envied in her own youth, but being an observer of people herself, she recognises sincerity in the girl's words, and being an observer of life as well, she senses that Miss Blythe's dedication is not only fuelled by a request her late brother made.

"Come to my office tomorrow after lessons," Miss Oliver instructs the girl. "We already lost a month, so there's ground to make up."

"I will!" assures Rilla, who, perhaps for the first time in weeks, finally feels some of the heaviness lift from her shoulders. Having carried the heaviness for months and being weighed down by it tenfold after Walter's death, she almost grew used to it, and the lightness of some of it being gone feels unfamiliar to her. At first, therefore, she doesn't recognise the feeling filling her chest, but then, after a moment, she realises that it is hope.

Yes, the path ahead might be long and thorny, and eight years might seem an eternity, but she finally has a path lying ahead of her again. After weeks and months filled with the murkiness of confusion, there's finally clarity before her again, and a path she can follow. Crucially, there are also two people who genuinely appear willing to help her along.

It is that same sentiment that she expresses to Shirley mere minutes later as, having taken their leave from Miss Oliver, they walk along the corridor from her office to the exit of Queen's main building. Linking her arm through his, she tries to find the words to express the gratitude she feels.

"You were right. She is helping me!" she points out to no-one in particular, shaking her head in wonder. "Thank you for bringing me here, and thank you for offering to study with me. I'm afraid you'll have you work cut out with me as a pupil."

"I expect as much," Shirley replies, his smile just a little teasing. Normally, Rilla thinks she ought to take offense at this, but it's the first time she's seen him smile properly since he brought her the news about Walter, and besides, where would she be without his support, unexpected as it might have come?

"I'm glad you're helping me," she therefore stresses, hoping he understands that she truly means it. "I don't fully understand why you're doing it, but I'm glad you are."

Hearing her words, Shirley pauses briefly, causing Rilla's steps to falter as well. Briefly, they stand in the corridor and look at each other, he pensive and she quizzical. Finally, Shirley shrugs and turns to continue walking, with Rilla hurrying to keep up.

Lengthening his strides so that he's just ahead of her, Shirley tells her, a little gruffly, "We've always underestimated you a little, which wasn't always fair. I just think it's time that someone stopped doing that."

And, as she follows him along the corridor, Rilla reflects that while she might still now know why Shirley decided he ought to be that person, she's very glad that he did.

A/N: I've got two trips coming up, one for fun and one for work, so the story will go on a break while I'm away. Expect the next chapter to be posted on October 3rd.

To Joanna:
I did, honestly, consider keeping Walter alive. This being my third AU story set during WW1, I once allowed him to live and once sacrificed him to the plot bunnies (though differently than in canon), so I thought he deserved to make it through this story, but... well, the plot bunnies demand to be fed. In canon, his death and his final letter do a lot of the work to make Rilla grow up, and as this chapter hopefully started to show, they're equally important to her journey in this story as well. She was aimless before, without a clear plan or even just a vision where to go and what to do, but Walter's words returned her purpose to her and opened up a path forward that she hadn't seen before. His letter from canon fit so beautifully in this changed narrative and expressed so many of the sentiments that this Rilla needed to hear just as much as canon Rilla (though for different reasons), that I couldn't not include it. In some ways, I really just wanted that letter for my narrative, so unfortunately, there couldn't be another fate for Walter but the one always foreshadowed for him since boyhood.
Shirley is a bit of an odd addition to the Blythe family, don't you think? I mean, don't get me wrong, I really like him as a character and I enjoy writing him a lot, but I can never help wondering quite why LMM included him in the first place. Jem's their leader and also a call-back to young Gilbert. Walter is the sacrificial lamb and also the inevitable child to carry on Anne's mantle as a writer. The twins fulfil Anne's destiny of always having twins on her life and also harken back to her early friendship with Diana. Rilla is the new teenage heroine for the novel set during wartime. They all, in their own ways, make sense, but Shirley doesn't really. I mean, if you were to take him out of the books entirely, they wouldn't really change anything. Is he there merely to sweeten Susan's fate of eternal housekeeper without a family of her own? Did LMM have more plans for him and never got around to including him? I honestly don't know and never succeeded in figuring it out either, but it all means that he very much appears like the forgotten child. Do his parents and siblings love him anyway? I certainly hope so, though canon only ever really tells us about Susan's love for him. It's always been somewhat odd to me, so when possible, I've tried to use my writing to bring Shirley closer into the fold, if you will.
Certainly, building a sibling relationship between him and Rilla is something I've always enjoyed doing in my writing and as the youngest two, I've also always felt they ought to be closer, despite their different personalities. I tried to build the last couple of chapters to build their understanding of each other and also show their genuine attempt at support. Shirley is really doing what he can to help Rilla, for no other reason that he cares, and I thought it was important that she acknowledged his grief of Walter in the previous chapter. I can't imagine Shirley not feeling like the odd one out in the family at times, so I thought it incredibly important for him to hear that yes, he's allowed to grief his brother just like they all are, because Walter was his brother just as much as he was Rilla's, Jems' and the twins'. (And in that vein, your idea of a story exploring the relationships between the Blythe boys is a truly excellent one and I dearly hope someone will write that story one day!)
Ah, the father of the baby... ;) We'll get there one day, I promise! Stuck with Rilla's POV as we are, we're currently hindered by her refusal to think about him at any time ever, but that's a matter she will have to grapple with one day, and I can promise we will all have front row seats during the reveal!

To Guest:
An article about Clara Brett Martin, that's what's in the magazine ;). She was a real historical figure, the first woman to become a lawyer not only in Canada but in the entire British Empire. She really fought for women being allowed to go to law school and be accepted to the bar, so she certainly paved the way for many other women to follow in her footsteps. It doesn't appear she made much of an impact on the world after that and there's a letter by her that suggests she also harboured anti-Semitic views, which cannot be ignored when writing about her, but her fight for acceptance of women as lawyers was certainly remarkable. For my story, she's providing both inspiration to Rilla and giving her a path to follow, so later views and writings aside, it was certainly useful for me to include her.

To DogMonday:
If there had been an advertisement in that magazine of someone offering their services in finding lost children, I imagine even Rilla would have put 2 and 2 together immediately ;). As it is, she wasn't particularly interested in the article about Clara Brett Martin initially and didn't see it as helpful to her situation either, so she probably just skimmed it. However, Walter, without quite knowing what he was doing, encouraged her in his letter to become active and to take matters into her own hands. Before, she didn't have any idea about how to proceed and how to go forward, but his letter, coupled with the almost-forgotten magazine, opened up a new path for her. She realised, I think, that, while there are people to support her, she ultimately has to help herself, and how she sees a way to acquire the tools to do that, even if the road ahead will be long and difficult.
For whatever it's worth, alas, I think that taking the academic route will actually be easier in some ways, because she doesn't have to expect as much opposition. If she were to announce her plans to travel to Calgary on her own to search for her son, her parents would put a stop to that real quick. However, they both consider education to be very important and I imagine they won't be displeased to have their youngest child finally take an interest in her own education as well. They certainly won't let her leave as easily as her siblings, but Anne already supported her about Queen's, so if Gilbert can be brought around, there's a decent chance they will support Rilla's strive for further studies under the guise of her suddenly having discovered her academic streak.
There's no grand secret that Shirley is hiding, I'm afraid. He might fancy himself to be more mysterious than he is, but there are no skeletons in his closet ;). We'll learn soon more about his motives and about why he's still hanging around in Charlottetown, but if anyone was hoping for a big scandal, I'm afraid Shirley will be a disappointment to them.