CHAPTER TWO: RELATIONSHIP ISSUES

A grumpy Radia sat at a small table with at least six or seven young princes and princesses who were all eating sloppily. Not to mention that her own suitor was eating just as sloppily as these three to five year olds.

"I don't get it!" Radia exclaimed, "I thought that, now that I have a suitor, I'd be able to sit at the adult table!"

"It's a mad world," Aigon said solemnly before turning back to their delicious meal.

"I mean, neither of us even fit in these chairs!" she continued.

"Why do you even have to come to this thing anyway?" Aigon asked, adjusting the sling that their left wing was resting in.

"It happens every day for one week out of the year. It's some stupid dinner meeting that all the rulers and heirs within a several thousand kilometer radius have to attend. Most heirs have already chosen or been appointed a suiter and end up married and at that table." Radia gestured to a much larger table with all the rulers and already married princes and princesses sitting at it.

"I see," Aigon stated, eating their pork. A young prince went to reach for Aigon's plate, but they hissed at him and made him cry. "So if you have me as a suitor, why are you still at this table?"

"Gee.. let me think!" Radia stated with sarcasm evident in her voice.

Aigon, Radia, and Kasaan all walked into the feast area together, greeted by some servants. Aigon sniffed the air and gasped. They ran to the fire where the food was cooked.

"Is that..?" they questioned as they examined a roasted pig, "Slow cooked to perfection…" They sniffed the belly, which was facing towards the sky before trailing all the way around the hog's circumference. "Seasoned all the way around!" They squealed with excitement before taking a big bite of it, earning a bunch of disgusted and judgmental stares from the other people at the big table across the courtyard.

"Worth it!" Aigon stated, "Besides, who cares what those people think? They all look like a bunch of snobs."

"I care!" Radia protested, "Someday, I'm gonna be a part of this society and represent Egypt, hopefully with you by my side! I need for these "snobs" to like me so we don't end up in a war!"

"Fair point," Aigon told their girlfriend, "I'm sorry babe… But I have instincts!" They set down the piece of bone they were working on and looked at her. "If I see a perfectly roasted and seasoned hog, I'm eating it!"

"That would be perfectly acceptable if your food weren't more on your armor than in your mouth," Radia scolded. Aigon looked down at their armor and frowned.

Aigon glanced over at Radia, who was sleeping peacefully beside them. They sighed and stood up. They grabbed their armlet off of the small table that rested beside their's and Radia's bed. The dragon put the armlet on and held onto it. They'd used it multiple times before. The truth about it, they probably wouldn't ever truly understand. Its time traveling properties were strange, but helpful. They didn't wanna go back and undo the day. Truth be told, they'd had a great day after their little argument with Radia, but they still felt bad about ruining her chance to sit at the adult table. So if they weren't going back, they'd go forward. They grabbed their fedora and put it on their head. They remembered the day they'd gotten it.

Aigon screamed as they flew through a time portal for the first time. They flew out of the other end and crashed into what looked like a performer who was wearing a suit and a cool looking hat. Aigon sat on the stage for a moment, trying to process what had just happened. Before they'd even realized that the performer's hat was on their head, the armlet powered up again and sent them back to their own time.

"I'm sure Michael Jackson doesn't miss this," they said quietly. They let go of their armlet and it started glowing. They then disappeared in a bright time portal.

Aigon jumped out of another portal on a rooftop in a busy city.

"Alright, London of 1965, time to teach me how to be proper!" They wandered around for a bit before coming across a bookstore. They looked at their wings and frowned. They grunted slightly as their wings, horns, and tail seemingly disappeared, although it was just their scales rearranging to hide them. They exhaled heavily and entered the store, picking up the sling that had fallen off their wing.

"Ello ello ello!" called the clerk at the register, "How may I help you on this fine night?"

"I need books on how to be proper," Aigon said, setting their hands on the counter. The clerk looked them in the eyes and nodded. He slid her two kids' picture books.

"Ten pounds," he told them. Aigon slid a smsll sack of gold coins across the counter and to the clerk.

"Hope that suffices," Aigon muttered as they then took the books and walked out the door.

Radia yawned as she sat up. She gasped upon seeing Aigon fall over in the corner.

"Are you okay- what…?" Radia questioned upon seeing the dragon, "W-What are you wearing?"

"I couldn't decide what kind of proper to be, so I chose both!" Aigon stated, revealing themself to be wearing a tux jacket and a long skirt, "I'm wearing both a girdle and a cummerbund. I'm very uncomfortable."

"Okay then…?" Radia stated, "Why?"

"So you can sit at the adult table, of course!" Aigon replied, "Hey can you help me get my sling tightened? I can't reach."

"Uhhh, yeah…" Radia replied, tightening the sling. "I'm so confused…"

"I went through several time periods and countries last night trying to figure out how to be proper." Aigon told their girlfriend.

"Proper?" Radia asked, "What are you talking about?"

"You couldn't sit at the adult table because of my bad manners, so I read up on how proper men and women act, dress, and eat," Aigon added, "I've stolen over 123,600 pounds in clothes and committed fraud in several different countries. Also I think I'm wanted in almost every Italian State in the year 2034."

"I'm still trying to process… this whole situation…" Radia stated, gesturing to Aigon's outfit.

"I'm doing this so you can be happy and sit at the adult table," Aigon told her, "Okay…?"

Radia looked them in the eyes and nodded, "So… combat boots?"

"Absolutely," Aigon told her, "I may be learning how to be "proper", but I'm still tasked with protecting you."

"Leave the sword," Radia sighed.

"Fine…" Aigon groaned, taking the sword off their back and putting it in the corner.

"And the bow," Radia added. Aigon sighed and took their bow and the few arrows they had planned on bringing with them and put them on the desk. "And the daggers."

"All of them?" asked Aigon.

"You can keep two," Radia told them. Aigon sighed and reached into the jacket pocket and removed four daggers, lifted up their hat and took out another three, reached into their skirt and grabbed another five, and then took off their left boot and dumped out another ten. "How did you even walk?"

The scene changed to Radia's nervous expression as she, her father, and a fedoraless Aigon entered the gates to the outdoor dining courtyard. Aigon gasped upon, once again, laying their eyes on a perfectly cooked meal. Their eyes widened, their mouth watered, their tail went back and forth at a rapid pace… but then they looked at Radia, and then at the messy kids table. They reached out to the food, but secured their arm at their side. They inhaled and exhaled slowly and looked at the ground, watching wherever Radia walked so they could follow. Radia sat at the adult table beside her father, and Aigon sat beside her. Across the table were a few princes and princesses. One of the princes had a pale white face, golden blonde hair, and the yellowest, most crooked teeth Aigon had ever seen.

"My my," said the prince, "Finally out of the nipper table, ay Radia?"

"Hello, Robert…" Radia muttered, "Good to see you haven't changed."

"What's up with him?" Aigon whispered as Robert went to talk to someone else beside him.

"He's the only one who got out of the kids table without a suitor…" Radia replied, "His parents died when he was fourteen and he got to take over his kingdom."

"That's horrible!" Aigon gasped.

"Yeah.. not for him," Radia told them, "Most of us think he did it, since he showed the most blatant nonchalance about the tragedy that anyone ever could, I mean, considering they were his parents."

"Ooh…" Aigon muttered, "Hey, I'm gonna go get something to drink from the future, you want something?"

"Get me one of those… Doctor Peppers as you call them," Radia said.

"'Kay!" Aigon replied, getting up and starting to walk away, "BRB!" Aigon then went out of the room and to the future.

"I must say," the princess of Finland spoke up, "Your suitor is… strange…"

"Strange how..?" Radia asked, shooting her a glare.

"I mean, it looks worse than an English breakfast," stated the prince of India.

"It?" questioned Radia, "They're a they-"

"It looks like you dragged it out of the rubbish just so you could sit at this table," Robert stated snootily, "And that outfit it's wearing."

"Hey!" Radia exclaimed, "I'll have you know that Aigon doesn't have a gender, so it's very confusing for them when there's no gender neutral clothes around here!"

"Bah!" laughed the Scottish prince, "I bet it's just waitin' for the day ya let yer guard down!"

"Listen here!" Radia snapped.

"Radia…" Kasaan muttered, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Sure, Aigon may be… different," Radia continued, "And sloppy, and gross, and all around unmannered but-"

"I'm what…" Aigon gasped, dropping a goblet of drink they had gotten for Radia, "I-Is that what you really think…?"

"Busted…" muttered one of the other princesses.

"Aigon… I-" Radia started before Aigon ran away. Radia slumped over in her seat and looked down at her plate. "They may be all of those things… But they're also the sweetest person I know, willing to help anyone at the drop of a hat… They'd give the tunic off their back to someone in need. And that's why I love them. Because they love others. And they're certainly better than all of you entitled, bratty, good-for-nothing snobs!" The other princes and princesses went silent. Even the kings and queens looked Radia's way. The princess of Egypt just scoffed, "I can't believe I ever wanted to sit here…" She then got up and walked in the direction Aigon went.

Radia found the dragon sitting against a wall, crying. She sighed and sat beside them.

"Do you really think I'm… gross?" Aigon asked after a very brief period of silence.

"Of course not…" Radia assured, placing a hand on their back, "I would never think you're gross… You can act gross at times, but you yourself? Never…"

"Why would you say that?" Aigon asked, looking at the floor still.

"To make a point…" Radia admitted, "You didn't stay long enough to hear me finish…" Aigon looked up and at Radia. "You're sweet… you're brave… you're selfless…" Radia kissed the dragon on the forehead. "You're so much more than the snobs at that table will ever be…" Aigon smiled warmly and hugged their girlfriend tightly. Radia pulled away and looked them in the eyes. "I don't ever want you to feel like you have to change yourself to fit in with the world or anyone in it… and especially not to make me fit in. It was selfish of me to even let you go through with this." Aigon was about to say something when screaming was heard outside.

"Something's going down!" Aigon gasped, "Come on!" The couple jumped up and ran outside to find several giant wasps flying around, coming very close to stinging several people. Aigon tore off the jacket and the skirt, revealing their armor underneath.

"You had that on the whole time!?" Radia questioned.

"Absolutely," Aigon replied, clipping on their cape and grabbing a dagger off their belt, throwing it at a wasp and killing it, "And you told me to leave my bow at home."

"Sorry, that's my bad," Radia apologized.

"Get everyone outta here!" Aigon ordered, grabbing their other dagger and jumping up and spreading their wings. The sling fell to the ground and Aigon was able to fly.

"This way!" Radia called, waving the royalty on. The kings, queens, princes, and princesses all ran past her and into the building.

"Just barbaric," Robert judged as Aigon bit into a wasp and clawed another to bits.

"Yep," Radia agreed, "But they're my barbarian. And I wouldn't trade them for the world." Aigon stabbed another wasp with their tail and threw their other dagger at one more. One went to sting them in the arm, but its stinger broke and Aigon was unscathed.

"Cool," they stated, "Impenetrability." They then jumped up and bit the last giant wasp, chewing on it like a dog.

"Such indignity!" cried one of the kings.

"Get em!" cheered Radia. Kasaan smiled softly as he watched this unfold. He wanted the best for Radia and, even though he knew that Aigon wasn't perfect, he knew that they were the best for Radia.

"Tastes like chicken," Aigon laughed, spitting the wasp out.

"Wow… this was… kind of random," Radia marveled, "Where do you think wasps that size came from?"

"I guess we'll never know!" Aigon said in a mysterious tone, putting an arm around Radia and gesturing to the sky.

"What are we looking at?" the princess asked.

"I have no idea!" the dragon replied.

"My lord… I'm sorry, but your wasps failed…" stated a shadowy figure.

"That dragon is becoming a nuisance…" replied the lord, his jackal head revealed in the torch light, "I don't take losses kindly. Find a way to get rid of the… thing. Before I get rid of you."

"Yes sir," swallowed the servant, "Right away… Seth…"

Radia smiled softly, watching Aigon dig into their food.

"So unruly…" muttered a princess.

"They're a dragon," Radia told her, winking at Aigon, "They have instincts." Aigon smiled widely before going back to their meal. "And I wouldn't want anything else…"