Disclaimer: I don't own South Park.
"Muhahahaha! Beware, citizens of South Park! I am about unleash endless chaos upon you! It is only fitting - for I am Professor Chaos!"
Dressed in his homemade silvery costume that reeked of villainy, Professor Chais laughed manically as he looked upon the little mountain town he planned to bring terror upon. A wicked, ambition grin was on his face as he observed the land from where he stood upon the climbing frame in the middle of the playground. He would've preferred to take it all in from the roof of his home, but Butters didn't want to risk his parents catching them on top of their house and ground him.
"Yesssss…! Yesssss…! Yesssss…!" Professor Chao's tone filled with increasing madness as he rubbed his gloved palms together. "Soon everyone will suffer at these hands which will bring eternal chaos! Nothing can stop me! Today it will be South Park, tomorrow, the world! Muhahahahaha-"
BONK!
Professor Chaos' cackling was cut off as something struck him at the back of his head. His sinister smile was instantly erased as his eyes widened with shock. With all his energy draining, a groan escaped him as his feet buckled and his little body crumpled.
Completely out cold, Professor Chaos could do nothing as the person who'd knocked him out hauled him down from the climbing frame before dragging his unconscious body away from the playground.
"We captured Professor Chaos!"
"No! We captured Professor Chaos!"
"Nuh-uh! I'm the one who got him, you guys!"
"Stop tryna' stealing our thunder, Fatass!"
"'Ey! I'm not fat! I'm big-boned!"
Professor Chaos weakly opened his eyes, woken by the bickering which reached his years. He slurred as he felt his head spinning in pain. He tried to rub it, but couldn't move his hands from behind his back.
As his blurred vision corrected, he saw that gathered in front of him were all his classmates. They were dressed in the colourful costumes of their superhero alter egos. They had hauled the young villain to the basement of Cartman's house, where they had handcuffed him to a chair.
"Oh hey, fellas!" Butters said perkily. "What's goin' on?"
All eyes turned to the naive blonde. Every superhero was looking upon him with relish over having him bound helplessly to the chair. Cartman stepped towards him, dressed in his Coon costume.
"You've been captured Chaos," the overweight kid declared, "by the Coon!"
"We all captured him, Cartman!" Kyle glared, wearing his Human Kite attire. "It's Coon and Friends, remember?"
"It doesn't matter what you bastards call yourselves!" Kenny uttered in the gravelly voice he spoke in as Mysterion.
"We, the Freedom Pals, got him!" Stan spun in his hands the utensils which made him Tool Shed. "We ain't gonna let you assholes take credit for all the good we do?"
"All the good you do?" Super Craig glared, being the only kid in the room not wearing hero's costume.
"You d-d-d-dickheads proved yourselves evil the moment you stepped on our t-t-turf!" Jimmy uttered, stuttering just as usual as Fast Pass.
"You're not welcome around here!" Scott barked, trying to sound threatening as Captain Diabetes, only for his speech to be slurred as usual.
"We're here to get rid South Park of the vermin that's around!" Tolkien announced, his voice echoed by the plastic jug he had on his head as Tupperware. "Staring with the retarded Coon!"
The entire basement filled with the noise of the kids bickering with one another. The two groups of superheroes raised the ceiling by trying to claim responsibility of who had captured Professor Chaos.
"We captured Chaos!" Clyde insisted, his voice buzzing as Mosquito.
"No," Toolshed argued, tempted to use his tools to attack his enemies. "We captured Chaos!"
"You guys," Butters spoke up, "could you let me go please? I really need to use the bathroom-"
"SHUT UP BUTTERS!" Every kid burst out.
"Oh hamburgers…" Butters slunk miserably in his chair.
As the superheroes continue to squabble, the door of the basement opened above them as Liane poked her head into view.
"Eric!" she called cheerfully to her son. "You and your little friends must be hungry? Would you like me to send down some cheesy poofs?"
"Go away, Mom!" Cartman snapped rudely to his mother. "And yeah, I want cheesy poofs!"
"Sure, hon!" Liane smiled and disappeared to the kitchen to fetch her spoilt, ungrateful son's favourite food.
As soon as the basement door closed, the children resumed their intense squabbling.
"We captured Chaos!" Suoer Craig snapped, flipping off the Freedom Pals.
"No, we captured Chaos!" Wonder Tweek yelled directly at the member of Coon and Friends whom he had history with.
"TIMMY!" Doctor Timothy exploded, almost giving away his unknown identity as Timmy.
The kids continued their loud, intense arguing for a little longer before Wendy stepped into the middle of the room. She stood in between the two groups of superheroes, her purple and pink outfit making her stand out as Call Girl.
"What does it matter who captured Chaos?" she shouted. "The point is we've managed to capture him! It's time to give Professor Chaos what he deserves!"
The boys went quiet, digesting what the sole female superhero among them had just said about their enemy - before cheering together in their agreement.
"Yeah!" Human Kite cried. "Let's give it to him!"
"Let Professor Chaos have it!" Mosquito buzzed.
"Wha-" Butters jaw hung open. "What are you fellas gonna do to me?"
The superheroes turned towards their hostage. They were all smirking in determination to deliver the brutal punishment they had in store for Professor Chaos. The two groups back away from each other to make a space between them - to reveal a certain someone among them who stood in the middle. Only now had Butters noticed he was among his captors.
"New Kid?" he exclaimed in surprise. "You're in on this?"
The New Kid stared blankly at Professor Chaos. He was as silent as always as he observed the villain who was bound to the chair. He made his way up towards Butters, gazing upon him without a trace of emotion to be seen on his features.
"Wha-What are you gonna do to me?" Butters asked nervously.
The New Kid didn't answer. He just turned wordlessly away from Butters. He stood with his back to the blonde - before summoning up all his strength.
"That's it, Butthole!" The Coon sneered. "Use your almighty powerful weapon on Professor Chaos!"
Butter's jaw dropped as he realised what the New Kid was preparing to do. His eyes widened in horror. He did not want to be a victim of the brutal gift which the newcomer of South Park had. He thrashed wildly about in the chair, trying to break free of the chair to no avail.
"No, New Kid, no!" Butter wailed. "Noooooooooooo!"
BRRRRRRRP!
A huge, loud far exploded from the New Kid. The gas which has built up inside him blasted out to fire into Professor Chaos' face. The captured villain didn't stand a chance as he was hit by the silent hero's weapon. All around him, the other kids began to cheer and pass comments over what had just happened to him.
"Wow, Butthole!" Tupperware exclaimed. "That's one powerful weapon you've got!"
"It's even stronger than the power of diabetes!" Captain Diabetes commented.
"Your farts always manage to help us out, New Kid!" Call Girl remarked.
"Even if they do st-st-st-stink!" Fast Pass stammered.
"TIMMY!" Doctor Timothy agreed.
The New Kid said nothing. He appeared neither proud nor remorseful for whatever he had just done to Professor Chaos. However he felt about passing his gas onto the notorious villain of South Park, he kept it to himself.
In his chair, Butters spluttered and coughed from the foul armour which had been fired at him. The New Kid's farts certainly were a force to be reckoned with. They were the absolute worst torture for anyone to suffer - as the unfortunate luckless kid had just found out.
"Oh, son of a biscuit…" Butters mumbled before passing out.
THE END