"But everyone's in their pods, why say something profound now?" The Pathfinder's voice echoed through the nearly silent corridors of the massive Ark Hyperion. "All right, fine… every great moment in our history began with a dream… that and an inexhaustible supply of cheap labor. Each bold leap forward was achieved by those willing to do anything… to anyone… to attain it. We are all leaving behind our families and homes, the very birthplace of our species; some because they are stupid, while others got suckered in by a good speech, and more still were offered a full pardon. Whatever the reasons, it's too late to back out now, bitches, so kiss the Milky Way goodbye, and get ready to work tirelessly toward a dream that will probably get us all killed. Welcome to the Andromeda Initiative."

In the year 2185, humanity lives in a golden age of interstellar travel. Our discovery of ancient alien ruins on Mars enabled us to spread through the galaxy like roaches, causing numerous problems for other civilized species, and trying to eat or screw anything we encountered. While many now enjoy the newfound freedom and challenges of exploration in the Milky Way, others were like 'nah, hold my beer'.

For the hundred thousand adventurers embarking on this one way voyage to even further distant stars, the future begins in…

MASS EFFECT

ANDROMEDA… ABRIDGED

Chapter One: The Awakening

634 years later; Date: 0 Hour 0 Day

Ark Hyperion; Occupancy: 20,000 Human Colonists

Andromeda Galaxy; Destination: Habitat 7 in Heleus Cluster…

Wondering how it was going to feel being in stasis for six hundred years, Scott Ryder got his answer when the pod lid locked into place with a sharp hiss, only to unlock and rise back up a second later as if something had gone wrong. Wait a second, he the young man thought while looking around, while it had been brightly lit a moment ago, the hyper sleep storage room was dark now except for a few lights spaced along the center of the corridor, just enough to see the features of the room as he sat up. Ugh, Scott's back was stiff, and his whole body was groggy as if having just woken up from a long nap… yeah, that must be it, the Hyperion must've entered the last stage of its journey.

"We made it?" He asked, hearing his own voice echo. "Are we in Andromeda?"

"I'm afraid not, Human." A low, hissing voice replied from the darkness. "We found your ship drifting in Dark Space, and good thing, too, because we're hungry!"

Suddenly the room was lit up in a dark red color while the white fixtures above began rapidly flashing like a strobe light, and the young man screamed as two large, insect like creatures dragged him out of the stasis pod. They hissed and clicked to each other while moving him over to a wheeled cart, one forcing him to bend over it, while the other stood in front and grabbed him by the hair. All around him the room was echoing with the screams of unseen victims, along with noises that sounded like a dentist's drill, the insect creature behind him holding the young man down tighter while the one in front picked up a similar tool, revving it up a few times so that Scott screamed again.

"You're gonna be probed!" It yelled, revving up the tool again. "You're gonna be probed again and again, in every hole you have, and then Malmar back there is gonna lay his eggs in your esophagus!"

"You're gonna be eaten alive from the inside out!" The one called Malmar added as Scott's screams became a lot higher pitch. "Probed and eaten, probed and eaten, probed and eaten, and then you are going to die! You're going to die… when you find out this is just a big joke!"

He was in the middle of a really loud, high pitch shriek when all of the noises stopped, the regular white lights coming back on while a bunch of people in Andromeda Initiative jumpsuits laughed and cheered. As for the two insect creatures, they were also laughing as they took off their big rubber masks to reveal that it was just a couple of stasis technicians, letting Scott up and slapping him on the back a few times while others blew party noise makers and yelled out things like 'welcome to Andromeda!' before getting back to work. Apparently the group had done this a few times, working to reset the lights and sound systems while the computer selected another pod for awakening.

"Ah, that's never gonna get old." The Pathfinder's voice said over the intercom. "All members of the Pathfinder Team report to the bridge as soon as you clear medical, and, uh… maybe get Scotty there a new pair of pants."

"Uh… yeah, that was um… really funny, you guys." The young man said, his voice cracking and knees still shaking. "Great joke, you totally got me… I can't wait to see how Sara reacts to it."

Suddenly everyone stopped working, completely silent as they looked at him with judgmental glares, some looking like they wanted to attack him, and one of the technicians smacking him in the back of the head.

"I can't believe you'd put Sara through that." The male technician scolded. "What kind of a jerk would do that to his own sister?"

"Right? I can't believe a prick like you is on the Pathfinder Team." The female technician replied. "Well, Scotty the Prick, you better go find us a lush, tropical planet to live on, or else we're gonna probe you for real. Now get out of my sight."

Pushing him forward as soon as the final scans for stasis exit were done, the two of them were still grumbling their disapproval as Scott walked out of the stasis storage bay, heading into medical where several other recently awakened personnel were being treated by various doctors. He knew the blue skinned Asari who was coming over to perform his examination, Dr. Lexi T'Perro, and the first thing she did was push a button to test whether the young man's SAM implant was functioning. The Simulated Adaptive Matrix was housed in the Hyperion itself, with each member of the Pathfinder Team implanted with a receiver/transmitter implant so that they could scan and coordinate with each other more efficiently.

"Look up, and follow the light." Lexi said, shining a small tool in his eyes. "I heard they got you pretty good with the insect gag… but at least you didn't try to sell the rest of us out to save yourself like Mr. Kosta over there."

"Uh, yeah… it was a… pretty clever joke." Scott replied, looking over at another man who was still shaking even more than him. "They're not doing it to Sara, though, everyone here seems to really like her."

"That is correct, Scott." The voice of SAM said. "Opinions of Sara Ryder by the crew list her as attractive, intelligent, and charismatic, in stark contrast to your listing as goofy, slow, and something called a spaz. Approval ratings for Sara also went up sharply after her appearance in issue #523 of 'Busty Brainiacs', the magazine that takes strong, successful women of science and business, and reduces them to bikini-clad bimbos for the ogling of the masses."

"Oh, were they still publishing that before we left?" Lexi asked, checking Scott's ears. "I was in issue #243… made enough money from that to pay off my student loans."

In response to what the Asari was saying, SAM brought up two yellow colored holographic images in front of its own avatar of swirling yellow and blue energy. Each image was a similarly colored magazine, one opened up to show Lexi lying on the beach while wearing not a lot, and the other one opened up to show the brunette Sara Ryder wearing even less while lying on a…

"I do not want to see that!" The young man exclaimed, turning his head while trying to swat away the images with his hands. "And besides, isn't something like that sexist? I mean, how would men like it if they were reduced to sexual objects for the use of women, and had no value except for how good their asses looked?"

"Oh my God, is that an option?" Liam Kosta, the man sitting across the bay asked. "Because I could totally go for that… and, uh… I don't mean to brag, but I have a pretty nice ass."

Lexi looked like she was about to say something, but then it felt like the whole ship lurched sideways. Lights flickered, sparks came out of some of the wall consoles, and then suddenly Scott was no longer sitting on the examination table. In fact, he wasn't sitting, or even standing on anything as he, and everyone else floated up into the air, the computer announcing that there was a malfunction in the artificial gravity system as even the next stasis pod to be opened began to float across the room. The reset controls for emergency systems weren't far away, so the young man tried reaching out for them, and even swimming through the air, but he just wasn't making any progress.

"I'll help you, Scotty!" Kosta exclaimed, his own swimming attempts causing him to begin flipping forward in place. "I think I've almost got it!"

No, he didn't almost have it, and neither did Scott as the two of them tried and tried until someone else entered the room. It was Cora Harper, the Pathfinder's second in command, and of course she was precise and graceful as she pulled herself along the wall consoles until she was able to reach the button, causing Scott and Kosta to scream as the room's gravity came back on with a vengeance. All over the medical bay, tools and carts crashed to the floor, with Kosta landing face first while the young man simply fell back onto the examination table, but the previously floating stasis pod got the worst of it, falling sideways and then shooting out sparks while the doctors scrambled over to it.

"Sara's pod's been damaged!" One of them yelled. "Alert the Pathfinder!"

"What?!" Scott exclaimed, jumping up. "Sara's pod?! Is she hurt?! Is she okay?!"

He and Kosta started to walk over to the small crowd to check on his sister, with the latter rubbing his sore face, but they were stopped when Cora blocked their path. Scolding them that the Pathfinder had called the whole team up to the bridge several minutes ago, and then slapping them both in the face with one swing of her arm, to which Kosta whined that his face was already sore, the young woman grabbed them both by an ear, making both cry out as she walked them out of the medical bay. Out in the corridor lights were flickering and consoles were sparking just as bad, as if something had caused damage to the entire ship? Had they been attacked? Had they hit something? If things were going this bad right from the start, then what did that mean for the Andromeda Initiative?