Disclaimer: I don't own South Park.

"Halt, ninjas!" Bulrog Cartman raised a hand to to stop his fellow warriors as he observed the figure in their path. "Who do we have here?"

"Why, it's the newest villain invading this region!" Shadow Hachi Stan exclaimed. "I've heard a lot about him. He's a real dark master of evil!"

"I say we introduce ourselves to him!" Bunraku Kyle suggested, "by giving him a taste of what we're made of!"

Ninja Master Kenny eagerly voiced his agreement, his speech as muffled as always.

The four ninjas quickly armed themselves with their weapons. They were ready to battle against the latest foe they had to deal with. It was their duty to fight evil and keep the peace in their land.

As he stood with his back to them, the villain's ears perked up, realising that the quartet behind his back were preparing to go up against him. He slowly turned around to face them, give them a blank, emotionless gaze.

"Hey, New Kid!" Stan said cheerily, breaking character. "How's it going?"

The New Kid remained as silent as always.

"We're playing Ninjas!" Kyle said. "Wanna join us? You can be our latest enemy we have to battle!"

"He won't stand a chance against the four of us!" Cartman sneered. "Not when we're armed with our all-powerful weapons!"

The boys held up the ninja weapons they'd purchased at the County Fair that had visited South Park. They still enjoyed playing with them to this day, having not learnt a thing from the bloodied incident they'd caused with them which had involved Butters.

"This'll be a peace of cake," Stan grinned, whipping his tonfas through the air.

"Since he doesn't have any weapons," Kyle added, swinging his nunchucku around.

"How are you gonna beat us, Douchebag?" Cartman jerked, using the same alias the New Kid always went by for their games as he pointed his sai towards him.

Kenny passed a degrading comment that was completely muffled, using his fingertips to spin his ninja stars - one of which having been the weapon to get lodged into Butters' eye.

As usual, the New Kid remained silent. He stared wordlessly at the ninjas who were preparing to do battle with him. It appeared as though the odds were stacked against him; not only was he completely outnumbered, but his four opponents each had their own deadly weapons while he had none on him at all.

The New Kid showed no signs of being worried or afraid. He knew exactly how to deal with these ninjas. He turned slowly away from them, summoning up all his strength.

All four of the boys froze in horror, realising what the person they'd dared challenge to a fight was preparing to do to them.

"No, New Kid!" Stan cried.

"Don't do it!" Kyle pleaded.

"Don't even think about it, Butthole!" Cartman hollered.

Kenny realised a muffled scream.

With all his energy gathered, the New Kid let out a loud explosive fart.

Brrrrrrp!

The ninjas were thrown into the air by the gas the New Kid blasted. They wailed as their weapons flew out of their hands. They soared several yards before they came crashing down onto the ground, the snow barely cushioning their falls.

For a moment, the four boys lay where they had landed, weakened from having the New Kid's powerful fart fired at them. Then they cried out as their weapons came down from the air, heading straight towards them.

Cartman yelped as his sais landed at the sides of his head, their blades scraping his cheeks.

Stan cried out as his tonfas bonked him onto his head.

Kyle groaned as his nunchucku whipped around to whack into his nose.

Kenny shrieked as his ninja stars sliced into his neck - before being silenced as they cut all the way through, resulting in his head rolling away as it was separated from his body.

"Oh my God!" Stan wailed. "He killed Kenny!"

"You bastard!" Kyke shouted, waving his fist at the New Kid.

"Goddamnit, Douchebag!" Cartman glared as blood dripped from the fresh wounds in his cheeks. "You can't ever play Ninjas with us again, you son of a bitch!"

The New Kid remained as mute as ever. He strode wordlessly away from the four fallen warriors he'd defeated with his own unique weapon. It was something that never managed to let him down whenever he had to fight off his opponents.

Who needs ninja weapons when one has an almighty, powerful fart?

THE END