But I wanted a Pony

Chapter 2. Surprise

Cassiopeia looked in Fantastic beasts and where to find them. And a plan occurred to her.

"Daddy?" she asked.

Harry looked at his eight-year-old daughter. "Yes?"

"I know I can't have a pony" she said. Harry nodded.

"Or a Pegasus," she added.

Harry nodded.

"I was thinking," she said, "I could have a Thestral?"

Harry closed his eyes "Thestrals can only be seen by those who've seen death." he said. He opened his eyes. Caph was waiting like a hawk.

"That's easy. I can just go to the hospice ward at St Mungo's" said Caph, and she smiled – and the dimples she'd inherited from her mother made her look sweet.

Harry sighed. It wasn't even technically evil. "Caph, no." said Harry, and he unwittingly set in motion a sequence of events that would change the world. But more significantly, Caph pouted and stomped off.

There was quite a lot of Daphne in her, thought Harry.

-==0==-

Daphne flooed home from Black Books and was immediately met by several daughters. Who all, rather loudly asked questions simultaneously.

Two minutes later, she desperately wanted a headache potion, and it seemed that her daughters might be… fighting over bathrooms.

She found Harry out by the greenhouse, cursing weeds to ash.

"Harry," she called out, and Harry lifted his wand and turned - his face split by a broad soppy smile.

"The girls are arguing about bathrooms," said Daphne, "I should have realised four daughters and one bathroom would never work."

Harry put his hands on his hips, "Well," he said, "we put Stella and Effie in the second guest bedroom, they can share the en-suite, and Hesper and Caph in the first one."

"The boys will see it as unfair," said Daphne.

"The girls have long hair. That is all," said Harry. "We couldn't um, get the girls to have short hair?"

"No," said Daphne. "Besides – they'll be young women one day and need more time in the bathroom."

"Think Hesper can stand up to her big sister?" asked Harry.

"She's a thinker – and I'm not putting Caph in her own room," said Daphne.

"Hesper as her official snitch?" said Harry. "We could make some more bedrooms."

"Where Harry?" asked Daphne, lifting an eyebrow.

"In the um… attics." he said "Magical plumbing, a few dividers, a bit of heating…"

"And you suggest this second why?" asked Daphne.

"Because they're fighting, we can move them today – or better, make them move all their things themselves, and have breathing space to build some more rooms." said Harry.

"How long would that take you?"

"I've never built bathrooms, but let's say a week," said Harry. "As long as nothing else crops up."

"Speaking of which," said Daphne, "I may have mentioned the small task for my sister's boyfriend."

"And?"

"She asked for a list – I will make one, with pictures."

"With pictures?"

"Well, he's never seen them, and she hasn't seen all of them," said Daphne, "I wouldn't want him finding the wrong things."

Harry raised his eyebrows and Daphne lifted her nose slightly.

"Just make sure the list doesn't have something incriminating written on it."

"Like… Dumbledore's army, perhaps?" asked Daphne.

Harry gave small head-shake and a sigh.

"Come on, let's go see the children," said Harry.

"They're yours as well – you were definitely there when they were made," said Daphne.

-==0==-

Daphne only ate a single slice of toast at breakfast – and one of Jimmy's herbal teas. "Feeling nauseous," she admitted.

Mrs Foster stopped cleaning up and whipped off a charm on Daphne immediately. "Maam, it's not simple stomach bug."

"St Mungo's," said Harry, standing up and addressing the children "Right, your mother's sick – we're going to St Mungo's to get it fixed. Best behaviour all of you, and I'll get Aunt Andromeda to come over."

Caph pouted. Oh not happy about Andromeda is she, thought Harry. Excellent.

Harry fired off a Patronus Charm and sort-of-Prongs-only-bigger snorted, then bent his head low for Harry to whisper the message, and bolted out through the wall.

"Elko!" cried Hesper, and Harry suspected that was the name of it now.

Harry helped Daphne to their room, helped her change, and put on his 'get out my way' robes.

The flooed direct to St Mungo's, and The Welcome Witch's eyes widened when she saw them standing at a fireplace, and she dashed over.

Harry held Daphne and said, "My wife is Ill. A healer, Now." There were people waiting on chairs, but Daphne was quivering in a way Harry did not like.

"Right away sir," said the Welcome Witch, and she waved a Green-robed male healer over, whispered, and they ran off – muggle trainers showing under their robes. They came back panting a bare minute later, and beckoned to Harry. He held Daphne's elbow, and they strolled past the waiting patients – a witch with a bandaged eye waved to them, and they had a long stroll down the hallway, to a consult room door, where the male healer pointed "Madam Grise will see you now" they said.

Harry helped Daphne in – she gave him a slight bump with her hip that indicated she felt pleased at being looked after, and they sat down at the chairs by the desk. The elderly witch looked at them both.

"Mr Potter-Black, Mrs Black" she said "I'm Healer Grise. What exactly is wrong?"

"Nausea," said Daphne, "Mrs Foster – our housekeeper, thinks it's not a stomach bug. She cast a diagnostic charm."

Healer Grise lifted her wand and cast a charm on Daphne, and cocked her head sideways "Not a stomach bug." she said "Have you eaten anything odd in the last few days?"

"Apart from all that seafood?" asked Harry. He got elbowed gently.

"I had fresh seafood salad a few days ago." said Daphne.

"If you'd bare your stomach, the charms will be more accurate," said Healer Grise.

Daphne unbuttoned her dress and lifted her blouse. Healer Grise cast a few charms, the last leaving Daphne's belly glow blue.

"Hmm" said Healer Grise. "I suspect you have a case of pregnancy."

"Can't," said Daphne, "He got the snip."

"After the quintuplets," said Harry.

"And you had a follow-up to be sure the operation was successful?" asked Healer Grise.

"Um, no," admitted Harry.

Healer Grise cast a spell on Harry's lap. A yellow glow lit his crotch for a moment.

"Hmm," said Healer Grise, "A curse."

"They used a dark curse," admitted Harry, "Even when my balls were regrown after the accident the curse was still there. The nurse said so."

"And we'd have been pregnant miles before now," added Daphne.

"Pants off, Mr Black" said Healer Grise. Harry sighed, stood up unbuttoned his robe-front, and pulled them off over his head, and undid his trousers, and dropped trousers and pants. Healer Grise cast the spell again – and a small part of his bollocks glowed yellow.

"That looks in order" said Healer Grise. She cleared her throat "There's no chance it's… someone elses?"

"Not a chance in hell" said Daphne icily. "Harry, pull your pants up."

Harry pulled up his pants and trousers.

"Well, we'll have to do a test," said Healer Grise, and she summoned a small jar, "Mr Black, if you'd put a sample in the jar. We can find some reading matter to help you… perform."

Daphne snatched the jar from Healer Grise and stood "Harry, come with me."

"Mrs Black, this is most irregular" said Healer Grise.

"If there's one thing I know after ten years," said Daphne, "It's what my husband likes."

Harry was crowded into a St Mungo's loo stall by Daphne, who growled, "The Nerve of her!" she snapped, "As IF I'd ever have sex with … anyone but you."

Harry nodded, "Um, look, if…" he started awkwardly.

"Harry, we need a sample. Fortunately I know just how to get one." she said, and lifted her dress hem and bent over the tank.

They returned to Healer Grise's office ten minutes later, and Harry put the jar down on her desk, and picked up his robes from his chair and put them back on. Daphne sat down primly, and looked over at Harry with a small, smug smile.

"Oh" said Healer Grise. She lifted her wand and cast a spell on the jar. A faint rainbow formed over the jar.

"Hmm" she said "That probably explains that" she said obtusely, and vanished the jar, contents and all.

"If you would explain?" asked Daphne, crossing her legs.

"Mr Black's not completely sterile. The regrowth must have partially circumvented the sterilisation curse," said Healer Grise. "Congratulations, you're going to be parents. Again."

"Um" said Harry "Can you um… recast that curse."

Healer Grise cast something on Harry's bits and cast a further three spells, that by the coloured glows seemed to be diagnostic charms. "That's redone" she said. "Now. I do understand that you already have seven children." She looked silently at Daphne.

Daphne sighed, "Harry," she said quietly, "Looks like that DIY project only has nine months to go."

"Are you sure you want more?" asked Harry. "I mean," he said awkwardly.

"As long as we get that spell on me as soon as we get home" said Daphne "It's not going to be a bother – and Missy's bored… and Caph and Altair are old enough to change nappies."

"You sure?" asked Harry.

"Yes – as long as you give me the spell," said Daphne, standing up.

"So, I should make you bookings for prenatal checks," said Healer Grise.

"Yes," said Daphne, "And I'll thank you not to suggest I would ever sleep with anyone but my husband."

"Terribly sorry-" said Healer Grise.

"Look," said Harry, "The mine blew by bits off, they grew back not quite sterile."

"I suppose," said Daphne, "My potion prescription probably prevented pregnancy at Nurmengard."

"Nurmengard," gulped Healer Grise.

"They stated out allowing us conjugal visits," said Harry, standing up "But took pity on us and let us share a cell."

"Because of your good behaviour," said Healer Grise.

"Because our children came to visit." corrected Harry.

"Repeatedly" said Daphne.

"But … Nurmengard." said Healer Grise.

"There are no Dementors there," said Daphne.

As Harry and Daphne walked to the St Mungo's fireplace, Harry wrapped an arm round her shoulders. Her hip bumped against him.

They flooed to Grimmauld place, and Kreacher appeared with a pop. The kitchen was clean – if cold.

"Kreacher," said Daphne, "Do try to remain invisible. You are deceased."

"Yes mistress," croaked Kreacher.

Harry wrapped his arms around Daphne, "Mrs Black," he murmured, "getting pregnant," he whispered in her ear.

"You just as much to blame" said Daphne.

"Apparating on three" said Harry "One … two… Three." With a crack, they disapparated, landing in the library. Harry let her go slowly, and she drew her wand and lit the fire, and started casting warming charms.

Harry went to the display cabinet and got out a large bundle of scrolls and started sorting through it.

"Now, Harry," said Daphne, He glanced over, and she was biting her lower lip "I'm so sorry I hexed you last time. I won't. I think… a reward, not a punishment."

Harry nodded, and flicked from scroll to scroll, finally pulling one out. He sat down and started reading.

"You can't remember it?" asked Daphne.

"$Hesh nash she she hasssahha$," said Harry. Daphne nodded. Harry went back to reading. She might not understand me when I speak Parseltongue, but she picks up on my body language.

Daphne had got up and picked out a book to read, and been reading for some time before Harry cleared his throat.

Daphne put the book down. "Yes please" she said.

Harry cast a long flowing spell in parseltongue, then stared into her eyes for some time before saying "There you go."

"I'm so sorry I hexed you last time" said Daphne.

"I worked that out" said Harry drily.

"But here I am feeling all… grateful," said Daphne. She smiled – and her dimples showed.

"What do we tell the kids?" asked Harry.

"Nothing – I won't show, and they can have a nice surprise." said Daphne.

"I really hope it's not five again" said Harry.

Daphne snorted, "Come on – lets go home and work out an improved bedroom plan."

"There is one thing though," said Harry, putting the scroll away. "Can you go a bit easy on the you-know-what this time."

"We have seven children Harry – I'm not going to be able to apologise in the parlour over and over," said Daphne.

"And the snug," said Harry, lips twitching.

"Still" said Daphne, looking around the library. "I could… be convinced to do something here… now."

"I was hoping you might say that," said Harry. Daphne inclined her head and Harry shook his "I was thinking of just kissing you," said Harry.

Daphne walked over, and standing in tiptoes kissed Harry. Harry's arm wrapped around her waist and up into her hair, and they started snogging, which quickly degenerated to snogging against the back of the library couch. Harry hissed into his kisses as he bit into Daphne's neck tendons and Daphne groaned.

"Oh you spoil me," she moaned.

...

Daphne rubbed her back and gave Harry some side-eye as they walked across the kitchen to the fireplace. "You're a monster" she said.

"You were quite into it" said Harry softly.

"You turned my head with your dark magics" said Daphne. "Then took advantage of me."

"Well, a bit," admitted Harry. He stopped and held Daphne's hand "Let's not repeat last pregnancy's … follies."

"But you like it" said Daphne.

"Like a cookie," said Harry, "besides, the kids will see."

"Not if we stick to unused bedrooms and bathrooms" said Daphne. "Do we plan on five?"

"We plan on five worst case" said Harry. "If we ended up with… more than twelve – god. If more than twelve, then they get bunk beds."

"Hmm" said Daphne.

"Well, there are the unused rooms behind the kitchen" said Harry frowning, "We've never used them for anything. Probably they could be three more bedrooms. The attic's got the middle room, and the other two big rooms up there we could halve. And we've technically got seven now, counting the guest rooms… and eight counting the old one out the side.

"Fine" said Daphne decisively, "We'll move Astoria's room to the room behind the sitting room, keep the girls in the guest bedrooms, and you fix up the back rooms. Then the loft rooms."

"We'll need plumbing in the attic" said Harry. "We'll get Summerville – he does good work – I'll build three ensuites, he can fit them out."

"All with ensuites."

"I think we're going to keep getting more daughters than sons" said Harry. "And if we do that, we can clear the girls out the best guest room, and have it spare for say… Andromeda, or your parents."

"Good planning." said Daphne.