AN: A while back, I wrote another J/P reaction story to the events of 'Repression." ('Fallout,' which is on this site if you're interested.) This darker take actually began as another story, but as sometimes happens, my muse had other ideas.

ooo

Something — A sound? Nightmare? — startled Tom from his half-sleep, and he reflexively clutched the compression rifle against his chest.

A quick scan of the corridor. Nothing, thank God.

He seemed safe for the moment, so up for a quick stretch. Too bad he didn't have a hat: It was too bright here, even though the corridor lights were on night mode.

All right … that was better. Now, where was he?

Oh, yeah, Deck 3. Actually, back on the floor of Deck 3 outside the Captain's quarters. He relaxed and let his head drop against the wall. What a day …

Well, that was an understatement. The "Teero incident," as the Captain euphemistically called it, certainly wasn't your run-of-the-mill bad day. He snorted. The correct term was "mutiny" — in live action this time, and potentially just as deadly.

He'd heard whispers about what happened in the Ready Room: something that snapped Tuvok out of Teero's grasp. But then he heard something else: that Chakotay handed Tuvok a phaser and told him to kill the Captain.

Tuvok, for God's sake! One of the Captain's closest friends. The cruelty was stunning, and he suspected that Chakotay's actions were spurred by something darker, more personal.

Not that he didn't have his own taste of personal betrayal. He wasn't surprised that some of the Maquis came after him to settle old scores. He'd taken his rifle off stun and fired a couple of shots to make them back off.

But then he ran into B'Elanna, and for a few awful minutes, he and his wife pointed compression rifles at each other. His rifle was still on "kill." He didn't know about hers. He tried talking to her, but there was no recognition, just hatred.

In the end, they were saved by a comm. Someone, Tabor, maybe, interrupted with an engineering question. The distraction gave him just enough time to get away.

And now he wonders if it was all Teero or if her hatred wasn't personal, too.

But hey, everyone was back to normal — consciously, if not mentally or emotionally. The Captain reminded them that everyone was a victim here. But some hurts run deep …

Once Doc released him, he went to their quarters. He couldn't talk to B'Elanna. Hell, they couldn't even look at each other. He packed a bag and made his way to some empty quarters. But he couldn't sleep; it all kept replaying in his head, echoing in the empty room.

So he left and aimlessly wandered the halls, rifle in hand, ending up here. He intended to check on the Captain but stopped before he touched the buzzer. Who was he to interrupt her? She had her own problems right now, she didn't need to comfort him, too.

At a loss for what to do, he finally sat on the floor, laying the rifle across his knees. If someone tried to attack her, he decided, they'd have to get through him.

ooo

He'd almost dozed off again when a noise registered. The door! He grabbed the gun, only to be stopped by a strong hand on his shoulder and an urgent voice in his ear. "Tom, it's all right. Put the gun down. That's an order!" He turned then and came face-to-face with the Captain, who looked as exhausted as he felt.

She joined him on the floor, but didn't say anything. "Tom, why are you sitting out here?" she finally asked. Fortunately, she didn't sound angry, just curious.

"I, uh, found some quarters, but I can't handle being alone, it seems," he murmured. "Wanted to check on you but figured you were asleep."

So you decided to guard my quarters instead?" she asked affectionately.

"Yeah," he admitted. "I guess I really don't have anywhere else to go."

She could have told him to go to Harry's quarters or Sick Bay.

She could have told him to check the Mess Hall — some of the 'Fleet crew supposedly were camped there.

Instead, she smiled softly, got up and held out her hand. "Come on, you can bunk on my couch."

Inside, he obediently ate the sandwich she replicated; she didn't eat, just poked at her vid. "So, how did you know I was outside?"he asked once his head cleared.

"I … the Doctor and I have been running periodic checks on the crew."

"If you're tracking folks, they can ditch communicators, you know."

"There are other ways to scan, you know," she retorted. "Actually, we've noted your travels tonight. We didn't want to intrude, but we were getting worried." She gave him a small smile. "I decided to run one more check, then head to your location. You saved me a trip."

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to worry you."

"It's all right,"she said softly."We're all trying to deal with this."

ooo

She helped him make up the couch, then excused herself to her bedroom.

The quiet lasted about an hour, then "Damn it, Tuvok … No!"

Her scream jolted him off the couch and into her room. She was sitting up, her eyes wild. "Captain! You're safe!" No response. "Kathryn! It's Tom. You're OK."

She finally shook herself, then looked at him. "Thank you,"she said softly as she started to get out of bed.

"You all right?"

She nodded. "I will be. But, unfortunately, once I wake up, I'm done."

A moment for that to sink in. "You know, maybe sleeping in the same room will help; make us feel less alone."

She raised an eyebrow, instantly wary. Oops … "I could sleep on the floor here," he offered. "Or you could sleep on the couch, and I could take the floor out there," he said, waving toward the sitting area.

This made her chuckle. "Sleep on the floor, and you'll crawl to Sick Bay in the morning." She considered, then pointed to the far wall. "Try the recliner; it's fairly comfortable. But as far as anyone's concerned, you slept on my couch."

"Agreed," he said. A few minutes later, he was more or less settled and about to say good night.

"Tom," her voice floated through the darkness, "I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't mention my nightmare to anyone."

The invincible captain, he he realized that Kathryn couldn't show any vulnerability right now. Already, one had been turned against her — could she trust that it wouldn't happen again?

In two moves, he was out of his bed and kneeling next to hers. She was sitting up again, still wary.

"You're safe with me. Always." A promise.

Was she crying? He couldn't tell. But then he felt her hand on his chest; on reflex, he covered it with his own. And for the moment, it was just them: two battered people holding on to each other in the dark.

"Thank you," she finally said, her voice rough, "That means a lot to me. And I think you know this, but you've always been safe with me."

"I've always known," he said as he squeezed her hand in response.

"Are you all right now? Think you can sleep?" she asked.

"I think so. You?"

"I think so, too. Let's give it a try, shall we?" she murmured with a final pat to his chest.

Unfortunately, sleep wasn't going to come easily for him. Tossing and turning would disturb Kathryn, so he tried to stay still. Eventually, he began to fiddle with his wedding ring, sliding it on and off — a nervous habit that annoyed B'Elanna to no end.

Off … on … off … This time, he held up the ring and studied it in the starlight.

He quietly turned on his side, the ring still tucked in his hand. His boots were near the recliner; next to them, his bag — still open and empty.

And without a second thought, he reached out and dropped his ring into the emptiness ...