If Ai Hoshino had to use a single word to describe Ritsuka Fujimaru when they first met, she would've said: ordinary.
He was nondescript — scruffy hair, average height, non-flashy aesthetics — someone that you couldn't even pick apart from a crowd of people.
The very textbook definition.
She would have never interacted, much less struck a conversation with someone like him, much less anyone else.
She wasn't much for talking to people at that time of her life. People never had the time for her, so she never had the time for them. It was a standard life for an orphan: if her own parents couldn't bother to care for her, then who else would?
Don't get her wrong.
It wasn't as the orphanage caregivers were bad. They just had their hands full caring for everyone else.
That was until that one afternoon in the school cafeteria.
She sat in the far corner — no one else bothered with grabbing these seats because they were more interested in roomier areas to sit and chat with their friends. She wouldn't say that she was a loner, rather that she was just simply not interested in talking with anyone.
Because really, what did friends do? Did she need a friend? They'll just leave her once they find out that she was not worth their time.
"I'm sorry, is this seat taken?" He asked, one spare hand gesturing to the free seat in front of her, while the other holding onto his tray of food.
Ai shook her head, continuing to focus on her ramen, not minding him any further than needed. He looked familiar, but then again, she was never good with names nor faces.
"Thank you for the food," he prayed before breaking out his chopsticks. He glances over at her — or maybe he was staring at her bowl. "Ah, you got the ramen set, too, Hoshino-san? How do you like it so far?"
"Eh?" Ai blurted out before she realized he was talking to her. "Ah yes, it's very good. Much better than any I had."
It wasn't a lie really, but it's not like she could say that the only time she had ramen was at school? It's not like the orphanage had the money for more pricier meals.
"Ah, is that so? Time to dig in then!"
He slurped the noodles up without further ado, and Ai could see the very moment his eyes light up in enjoyment.
It's strange, Ai mused to herself, how she never really noticed how emotive a person's eyes can be.
Eyes usually frightened her — they often looked at her as if she was just never meant to be there. Disappointment. Sadness. Anger.
Perhaps that's why she was never good with faces — she didn't want to look at them in the first place. Life felt monotonous — as if she lived in a grayscale world where nothing bright could be found.
That was until now.
The blue hues of his eyes began to bleed into the canvas of her world.
As if a star peered down from the darkness of the night and guided her.
"You were right! I never had the ramen here before, but this is really good!" He exclaimed, oblivious to how Ai started to study his expressions, continuing to pick up more noodles — but he paused right before he brought it to his mouth. "Ah, I'm sorry, did I interrupt you, Hoshino-san?"
"No," she denied, "I was just wondering how did you know who I was?"
His lips formed a small pout, and she had to admit it was rather adorable.
"I know we haven't talked that much, Hoshino-san, but I sit right next to you in class, you know?"
A sheepish chuckle was the only excuse she could offer.. "Ah…I'm not usually good with remembering people. Sorry."
He waved off her apology. "It's fine, I was just teasing you. My name is Ritsuka Fujimaru, nice to finally talk with you, Hoshino-san."
Fujimaru lowers his chopsticks, scratching his cheek.
"Oh, by the way," he murmurs, pointing to the right side under his chin. "You got a bit of noodle stuck on you."
Ai could now consciously feel the food on her , she scrambled to reach for a napkin but dropped her chopsticks in the process. Then in her rush to pick up her fallen chopsticks, she bumped her head on the table's edge.
"That smarts," she moaned as she rubbed her forehead.
"Oh my, I didn't mean to startle you! Here, let me help you up!" He clamored, only for him to stumble over the leg of his chair and also bumped his head onto the table.
Maybe this was the actual reason why no one bothered to sit here. It was probably cursed.
As they raised their aching heads up together, their gaze met each other, and both of them broke out in laughter at the absurdness of the situation.
For the first time, Ai didn't think that looking at someone's face was that scary anymore.
Ritsuka Fujimaru, she rolled the name around in her mind. How fitting was it to meet him in summer?
If Ai Hoshino had to use another word to describe Ritsuka Fujimaru when they became friends, she would've said: strange.
People never bothered to do anything unless it benefited them in one way or another. That was how her mother was. She couldn't bother to care for Ai any more even after her release from prison.
So it confused her to no end, when he insisted on doing things that never really benefited him.
After finding out they were indeed seated next to each other — he was to the left of her — she found herself enjoying school a bit more.
Mainly because observing him always taught her didn't really bore her as much as the lessons did.
Like how now he was falling asleep, the classic tell-tale signs of unfocused eyes and nodding his head back and forth. This wasn't the first time that it happened. It won't be the last either.
After quickly glancing back to the front of the class, she wasn't the only one who noticed it.
The chalk whistled through the air as it landed on its mark and hit Ritsuka right on the forehead.
"Ah, what hit me?" Fujimaru's eyes snapped wide open as he flailed around in his desk.
"Glad to see that you're now with us in class, Fujimaru," the teacher drawled, and the class laughed.
"Now if you don't want to get extra homework, make sure to answer this question correctly. Minamato-no-Yoshitsune made his mark in his history with his achievements during the Genpei War, especially during the naval battle of Dan-no-ura. What was his childhood name?"
"Ushiwakamaru!" Fujimaru responds without hesitation.
"Correct," the teacher confirmed. "Glad to see you're not slacking in your studies. This will be on your test. Now Hoshino, tell me who was Yoshitsune's greatest follower, known for his strength and loyalty?"
"Eh," Ai murmurs, stalling to try and remember who it was. History was never her strong point, but a motion from her left caught her attention.
Fujimaru held out seven fingers while trying to hide it from the teacher.
Seven? That's right; there was that one person with seven weapons or tools.
"Benkei?" Ai answered, hoping she remembered correctly.
"Correct." The teacher nodded and began to write on the chalkboard — Minamoto-no Yoshitsune. Then he draws a line and writes "Minamoto-no-Yoritomo" at the end of it.
"Now let us talk a bit about Minamoto-no-Yoritomo, the elder brother of Yoshitsune. It was said that Yoshitsune led several campaigns against the Taira Clan in the Genpei War for his brother Yoritomo. After the Taira clan was defeated, Yoshitsune was awarded several titles by the Emperor Go-Shirakawa."
He paused, now drawing a question mark between the two. "Some historians speculate that since Yoshitsune now had enough support — talented followers, accolades, and the Emperor's favor — he could oppose his brother and take over the clan. Others speculate that Yoshitsune had no aspiration to do so, and that Yoritomo was simply too jealous and suspicious of Yoshitsune. Regardless of the reason, Yoritomo opposed Yoshitsune's rewards and titles and later sought to dispose of him."
After everything Yoshitsune had done for his brother, Ai wondered, was it simply cruel or pragmatic of Yoritomo to turn on him so easily? It only reinforced the idea that people really only do what benefitted them the most.
At the end of the class, Ai had to thank Fujimaru for telling her the answer. "Say, have you always been interested in history?"
He nods, putting his textbooks back into his bag. "Just a bit. I grew up listening to the Chronicles of Yoshitsune. So you can say that Ushiwakamaru is my childhood hero."
That surprised Ai. "Is that so? Do you think it was sad that everything Yoshitsune did, his brother still wanted him gone?"
Fujimaru paused his shuffling and let go of his bag's clasp. "No, I don't think it's sad."
"Why do you say that? He was betrayed by the one who was supposed to be his family?" Ai pressed on.
"Last year, I had a neighbor once — a war veteran," he recalled, wistful of nostalgia touched his face. "I talked with him every day after I got home from school. He lived by himself for nearly twenty years by himself — no one visited him, not even his family. It made me mad, actually. I told him that after everything he had done, he was left alone with nothing."
Just like me, Ai shouted from inside of her. After all of this, she had no one. No family and no friends.
"But he told me," Fujimaru continued, "'It's true that there were sad and painful times, but when I look back, they become trivial and insignificant. And it's not a lonely life either — after all, I'm talking with you'".
"It was then I understood that life didn't need to be rewarding for it to be wonderful, rather it's how you live your life that does. After all, we got to be friends by banging our heads on the table, right?" Fujimaru winked at her.
Ai giggled, but she was more glad than she expected. Her first friend. Her very first one. "That's a strange reason for us to be friends."
"Is it?" Fujimaru questioned, closing his bag. The two of them silently decided to walk out of the class together. "I like talking with you though."
She tilted her head in confusion. "I don't think I'm that interesting."
"That's not true. Aside from your love of ramen, you also like to sing, don't you?" Fujimaru asked.
She had to admit that Fujimaru had a frightening ability to keep on surprising her no matter what. She didn't think she told him that at all. "Eh?"
Fujimaru scratched his head. "Ah, well, sometimes when you're lost in your own thoughts, I can hear you sing along to a tune."
"Oh boy, that's actually embarrassing to hear," Ai lamented. "I didn't think anyone would hear me."
"But you do have a wonderful voice, you know?" Fujimaru complimented her. "I'm sure that if you ask someone else, they would say the same and ask for an encore."
"Enough of that, you're just teasing me, aren't you! You dummy!" Ai exclaimed, heat rushing to her cheeks.
Fujimaru laughed, "Hey, what are friends for?"
If Ai Hoshino had to use one more word to describe Ritsuka Fujimaru when they became lovers, she would've said: genuine.
He had invited her to go to the beach with him — said that he had something important to tell her.
In the year that she became friends with him, she had never known him to lie. He really wears his heart on his sleeve unlike her who still kept it locked tight inside of her.
She would say that being with him was the most fun she ever had in her life but still — a part of her feared when it would end.
How long would it be until he found someone else more interesting to be friends with and leave her behind?
Ai knew it was irrational — that he wasn't like everyone else in her life — that he honestly did care for her.
And so she took President Saitou's offer to become an idol.
If her lies weren't the truth, then she would keep on lying until it did. If she wasn't someone special, then she would have to become special. If she didn't love people, then she would lie until she did.
Maybe then, she would admit to Fujimaru — and to herself — that she cared for him as well.
That she too enjoyed their long discussions when walking from school.
That she liked it when he constantly praised her singing.
That she found it cute when he had to lecture her on the "cool factor" of mechas.
That she got annoyed whenever someone else talked to him and asked for his help.
Because Ritsuka Fujimaru is the opposite of her.
Her lies protected her ugly self. His truth reflected his beautiful heart.
But if she took the wrong step, how could their relationship be the same again?
And so she found herself excited and dreading what was so important that Fujimaru had asked her out.
They met together in the early morning — Fujimaru had arrived fifteen minutes earlier only to find Ai had been there even earlier than he was. Both of them laughed and ribbed at each other before they hopped on the bus towards the beach
Unlike before she became an idol, she now had to disguise herself with a mask and sunglasses, but Ritsuka had never minded. But even now, she could see something different in him.
The constant wiping of his hands on his handkerchief; the constant clearing of his throat and gulping — various signs that Ai had learned during her idol training to tell that he's nervous.
It was strange but comforting, in a sense, because Ai had always known him to be a very confident person. That he too can show another side meant that there was something else she could learn about him.
As she walked out of the bus when they had arrived, she smelled the briny air for the first time. She had never been to the beach before.
Fujimaru slapped himself lightly on the cheeks before he said, "Looks like a wonderful day for it. Let's go, Ai."
Before she could even register that it was the first time he called her by her given name, he had reached out and taken her by the hand.
It was big and rough, and she realized the difference between her hands and his — but it was gentle and comforting. How long was it that someone had touched her? She didn't realize how much she would crave such warmth — that she wasn't willing to let go.
It was a day full of a lot of her firsts.
First time stepping onto the sandy beach.
First time holding hands with someone.
First time letting the cold sea waves caress her feet.
First time scavenging for colorful sea shells.
The sun was about to set, dying the sea a bright orange.
"Ai," Fujimaru had started, once again using her first name, pausing to take a deep breath. "Did you have fun today?"
"Yeah I did," she admitted, watching how the waves come in and out to the shoreline. "I didn't really think you'd take me seriously when I said I wanted to see the sea one day."
Fujimaru smiled. "Of course I would. I always pay attention to you. I'd do anything for you."
"Really?" Ai asked. "I must be a lucky gal to have such a good friend. "
"No, if anything I'm the lucky one," Fujimaru murmured, shaking his head. "Ai, don't get me wrong here. I don't want to be just friends anymore."
Her heart had dropped, fearing the worst. "What?"
Fujimaru took both of her hands into his. "You're an idol now, but even so, I want to be with you. I want to support you and your dreams. But I'm afraid — afraid that you'll go so far away from me."
"No, that won't ever happen!" Ai blurted out. "I don't want you to leave me either. Not like everyone else."
This wasn't the reason why she became an idol. Not at all.
Fujimaru intertwined his fingers with hers. "I won't leave you. No matter how far you go, I will always keep my eye on you. I know that you can't publicly have a lover, but I want to be selfish. Would you please be my girlfriend, Ai?"
"Yes, Ritsuka, I will!"
First time someone embraced her.
First time she embraced someone.
First time she felt loved.
