Chapter 2
It Only Takes a Taste
Airy sat on the grass, staring at the landscape. The clubhouse stood in the midst of a grassy field. To the others, it was just a typical competition area, but to Airy, it was heartbreakingly similar to the Plane. After he had died the second time, he had ended up in the after life once again. Only this time, instead of an empty pink-orange void, the place he found himself was the Plane. The radio now sat in the wood shack ONE's contestants had made during his… break.
Airy hadn't touched the radio, unable to leave behind the last trace of his home, since he'd died. How long ago was that, three months? Four? He wondered if Backpack had figured out how to send everyone back yet. Probably not, it took him at least a decade to learn how to bring people to and from the Plane.
Airy was pulled from his thoughts by a voice behind him.
"Hey… you're Airy right?" Airy turned around to see Daddy Long Legs towering over him.
"Um, yeah." He responded.
"I'm… Daddy Long Legs. Mind if I… sit down?" The spider asked.
"Sure."
Daddy Long Legs sat on the grass, his legs stretched out in front of him.
"So," he started awkwardly, "What were you… thinking about?" Airy thought about how to answer for a moment.
"My show…"
"Oh, what's it called?"
"It was called ONE. My contestants we're competing for a wish for anything."
"That sounds really cool. My show… Doesn't really have a prize right now…but I'm… working on it. What did they wish for?"
"Huh?"
"Oh, um… You said your show was called ONE… so I thought… I thought it ended…"
"We didn't really… Have a winner." Airy replied. "The show kinda ended early. Everything sort of fell apart." The lantern frowned as the image of rocks rushing to meet him played in his mind.
"Sorry about that… It sounds like it was a really cool show…"
"Yeah, it was." Thoughts of Airy's death were replaced with thoughts of his contestants. Regardless of whether they really wanted to be there or not, they'd all brought so much life to his little world.
"I'll have to watch it some time."
"Oh, you um, can't."
"Why not?" Airy wasn't sure how to answer that. He couldn't admit that his entire show was fake. Daddy Long Legs might not want to talk to him anymore if he did. Or worse, he'd tell Geek and Airy would get kicked out. Sent back to the waiting room to scrub through channel after channel, knowing he would never find his home again.
"Because… Uh… What's going on over there?" Airy pointed to Team T.E.C.H. who were currently arguing with the specter of death.
"What do you mean, no?" MePhone asked the skeleton.
"Choose a game…" It replied.
"I just did. Rock Paper Scissors." Death shook its head, as it had the first time MePhone had requested that challenge.
"Maybe you can't do the same game twice." Speaker Box said.
"Maybe. How about checkers?" MePhone asked. A table and two chairs suddenly appeared. Atop the table was a setup checkerboard. "Alright then."
Meanwhile, Two was walking over to Geek. The host stood off to the side, watching the contestants as they interacted. Taking it in with their usual wide smile. For some reason, Two thought they looked lonely, standing by themselves. Or maybe the number was just projecting. Either way, they walked up to the Blue haired being and waved.
"Hey Geek, How's it going?" Geek turned their head to look at Two.
"Hi Two! I'm doing well, that last challenge was really fun to watch! Are you enjoying the competition so far?"
"I am. It's a little tricky without my powers, but I'm sure I'll get the hang of things in the next challenge."
Geek's smile seemed to get a little brighter. "I'm really glad to hear that!" Their gaze flicked over to the rest of Team T.E.C.H., then back to Two. "Is there a reason you're not talking to the other contestants? Is there something I can help with?"
"Um, no. I just saw you standing by yourself and thought you could use a friend." Confusion filled Geek's eyes.
"A… Friend?"
"Yeah, you know, someone you hang out with and talk to. Like Four and X," Two pointed to the two other Algebraliens, who were sitting on the grass playing patty cake. "They're really good friends."
"So, I'm supposed to have a friend?" Geek asked. The question confused Two.
"Well, you have to if you don't want to, but most of the time having friends makes people happy." Two said. Geek looked deep in thought for a moment, then they turned around and then started walking away. "Okay… Good talk." The rest of Team T.E.C.H. came up behind the green number, including a newly recovered Supercomputer.
"What was that about?" The chip asked.
"I'm not sure, I was just talking to Geek cause they seemed lonely, and I thought they could use a friend. But when I told them that, they seemed really confused, like they didn't know what the word meant. They asked me if they were 'supposed' to have friends."
"Huh." Supercomputer said. Something about this host didn't sit right with him. The way they talked and acted seemed strangely familiar. Before he could think more about that however, Geek appeared next to him.
"Sorry about that! I had to take care of something! Anyway, now that Supercomputer's back, we can do the elimination!" And with that, all of the contestants were teleported away.
They reappeared on some sort of wooden platform. Three things became immediately apparent. One, the platform was suspended over a canyon so deep it seemed to stretch on forever. Two, the platform was connected to solid ground at one end, making that the only way off of the board. Three, there was a massive axe blade hanging over the connection between the board and the cliffside.
"Welcome to the Chopping Block!" Geek exclaimed. "Get it? Cause you're all on the Chopping Block, figuratively and literally!" The contestants all groaned at the pun. "Anyway," Geek continued, "If you're safe, you get to step off the block and join me on solid ground! You also get a prize!" The host pulled out three plastic cards. "Today, in honor of Team T.E.C.H. being the first team to send someone home, the prize is a Best Buy gift card! Who ever doesn't receive a gift card will be sent falling down the Infinite Pit Without a Cool Acronym, or IPWCA for short!"
Geek pulled out a whiteboard, similar to the 'Rulz' board, but this one had the word 'Vots' at the top. "We got 10 votes this chapter!" They said, writing a big '10' on the board. "That's more than the first episode of BFDI! So we must be doing something right! Speaking of BFDI Announcer is the only one who got zero votes, so he's safe!" Geek threw the gift card like a frisbee at the speaker box's spot, only to realize he had already moved off the platform. The card sailed off into the void. "Sorry…".
"I really wanted that gift card." Announcer said. "Losing it makes me want to cry." Several globs of neon green acid shot from the circular speaker embedded in his face. The acid hit Geeks hand, in which they were holding the rest of the gift cards. The cards melted to a gross, plasticy soup on the floor, but surprisingly Geek's hand was fine. Geek stared at their empty hand.
"Really Announcer," MePhone called across the chasm, "You couldn't have been looking anywhere else when you did that?"
"I didn't want to be the only one who didn't get one." Announcer replied in a monotone.
"Well you wouldn't have been the only one," Two piped up, "It would have been you and the person who got eliminated."
"That's not any better." The speaker box said. Geek stayed staring at their hand. Supercomputer noticed this and tried to get their attention.
"Hey Geek, you good over there?"
"Two is the next person safe at 1 vote!" Geek exclaimed, snapping their head up. "I don't have any replacement prizes, so you'll have to be happy with the satisfaction of having survived the elimination!"
"That's enough for me." Two said, foregoing the bridge entirely and just jumping across the gap.
"Now it's down to MePhone4 and Supercomputer! It was really close too!"
"It was?" Mephone asked.
"Nope! Mephone, you only got two votes! So Supercomputer is eliminated with seven votes!" Supercomputer seemed shocked at first. But, as Geek pulled out a big red button from their pocket, his face changed to one of realization.
"I've got it! I know what they are! They're-" It was at that moment that Geek pressed the button. The axe blade fell. The platform, and Supercomputer, fell into the IPWCA. This didn't really surprise anyone. They'd all eliminated contestants mid sentence before. It was just part of running an object show.
After reuniting with the other team, Geek began to explain the next challenge.
"The next challenge will be a baking contest! Both teams will make a tasty desert and I'll judge them on a scale from one to ten! You'll have one hour!" They pulled out the 'Rulz' board and wrote 'Summoning: INGREDIENTS ONLY' "For this challenge, you are allowed to create your own ingredients and tools, but you can't just make your dessert! You're gonna have to bake them the old fashioned way! And go!"
"Alright team Everyone Else, we gotta make something that will really blow Geek away! What should we make?" Four asked his team.
Airy shrugged. "I don't know, I don't have much knowledge about food." He honestly couldn't remember the last time he'd eaten anything, period.
"Mmm… Apple…" Daddy long legs said.
"That's it!" Exclaimed X, "We can make an apple pie!"
"Oh, um yeah… that sounds great…" The spider replied. He'd really just been thinking about an apple, but X's idea was pretty good.
Meanwhile, Team T.E.C.H. was also deciding what to was about to suggest a cake, but MePhone spoke first.
"I know a great recipe for chocolate chip cookies!"
"Sounds good." Said Announcer. "Two, are you ok with that?"
"Yep! Sure thing!" They were a little disappointed, but they'd been meaning to expand their baking horizons anyway. That, and it was probably best they didn't step on any toes at the moment, given their lackluster performance last challenge.
"Great." Mephone said. "I'll get the ingredients. Two, you can make the oven and then help me prep the cookie dough." Two and MePhone began summoning the materials needed for the cookies.
Airy watched as Two summoned an oven out of thin air.
"Hey Four, could you make our ovens for us?" He asked. Four looked off to the side, seemingly embarrassed.
"I, erm, can't make stuff that complicated. Not without a lot of prep time first."
The blue Algebralien looked across the field at Team T.E.C.H., glaring daggers at the back of Two's head. Why did their stupid sibling have to upstage them again? Two with all their fancy powers, no matter how strong Four was, they just looked weak and lame in comparison. This was the split all over again. It made Four want to march over there and Screech Two 'till their ears bled. To go steal something from them like the green number had stolen their contestants three years ago. Actually, that was a great idea.
"But I don't have to." Four said. "Cause we can just Steal Team T.E.C.H. 's oven while they're not looking!"
"Ok."
"Hey X," Four called, "Go steal Team T.E.C.H. 's oven." The smaller Algebralien looked up from where he was making the crust for the pie.
"Why do we have to steal it? Couldn't we just… ask to use it?" He asked.
"Um…no."
"Okay!" X walked off towards the other team, making sure to be their sneakiest.
Mephone had just gotten the cookies out of the oven, and boy did they smell good. It was almost too tempting… but no. These cookies were for the challenge. He had to remain strong. No matter how delicious the cookies looked or smelled.
X made it to the oven, it didn't seem like anyone was around, so this should be easy. Just as they thought that however, they heard a monotone voice behind him.
"What are you doing?" Speaker box asked.
"Uh…" Unable to think of a lie, X decided to forgo the theft plan entirely. "Can we borrow your oven?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"You're on the other team, and this oven is ours"
"Oh." X said, disappointed. They then spotted Two, and walked over to them. "Hey Two, can you make an oven for us?"
"Sure thing little buddy!" Two said, always eager to help. They made an oven almost identical to the first.
"Thank you!" X replied as he picked up the oven and went back to his team. The announcer saw this all happen, and teleported over to Two.
"Two," Announcer said, teleporting next to them. "Why did you do that?"
"Oh, well I don't think anyone on X's team can make ovens so I figured I'd help them out."
"That was a good thing." The text to speech box couldn't display any emotion, but if it could, it would probably sound frustrated. "If they couldn't do the challenge, then we would have definitely won. Now there's a chance we'll lose again."
"Oh, sorry, but I was trying to help a friend!"
"A friend you're competing against."
While the other two members of his team continued to argue, MePhone placed the cooled down cookies onto a plate. His stomach rumbled as he did so. He'd made a ton of cookies, the cellphone reasoned with himself, having just one wouldn't hurt. No one would know anyway.
"Whatever, let's just hope those cookies are good." Speaker box said, turning away from Two and hopping back over to MePhone. The plate the cookies had been on was now conspicuously empty, and MePhone was clearly eating something. "Did you seriously eat all our cookies?" The box asked.
"...No." MePhone said through a mouthful of cookie.
"Maybe we could make something else?" Two suggested.
"Only five minutes left!" Geek shouted at that moment. "Add your finishing touches now!"
"Great." Speaker Box said. "Five minutes left and we have nothing to show for it. We're going to lose again."
"Maybe not." Two replied, getting an idea. "I know a quick recipe that's sure to win!" They summoned a large chunk of Ice on the plate, then chopped it into eight slices. "Tada! An ice cake!" The other two stared at the ice cake.
"We're doomed." MePhone said.
"Okay contestants," Geek exclaimed. "It's judging time! I'll start with Team Everyone else!" They picked up a slice of the apple pie and took a bite. "Wet! I like it! 8/10!" This was met with cheers from Team Everyone Else. There was no way a chunk of ice was gonna beat an 8/10. Geek took a bite of the ice cake. "Crunchy! 9/10!"
"WHAT?!" Four shrieked. "IT'S LITERALLY A CHUNK OF ICE! No way it deserves a 9!" He stomped over and grabbed a slice of the ice cake, chomping down on it angrily. Four's face setting suddenly switched to surprise. "This actually tastes really good." The block of ice somehow actually tasted like a real cake. It also was, as Geek had pointed out, delightfully crunchy.
"So team T.E.C.H. Is safe, and Team Everyone else is up for elimination! Remember to type in brackets the name of the person you think should be eliminated! The people you have to choose from are
Four
X
Daddy Long Legs
Airy
Voting will end September 22nd! See you all next time!"
AN: Yeah, two weeks was way too long to wait, and almost all the votes came in the first week anyway, so just one week this time. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed.
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"Hi, I'm Geek! The host of Object Showdown! Would you like to be my friend?"
