Kiran laid in bed after a long day of helping guide the Order of Heroes, exhausted and trying to catch some sleep. The sun had set hours ago, but Kiran's duties tended to weasel its way further into the night than they were willing to admit. Luckily, things had been tame as of late, so their sleep schedule hasn't been as atrocious as it was before.

Whilst preparing their bed, the summoner took note of the clear weather outside, moonlight pouring into their room. It's the perfect nightlight to soothe the weary. While not an uncommon sight, it felt special in a way that comforted Kiran.

Taking in the ambience and winding down, Kiran found themselves unable to properly relax despite it all. It was then Kiran was reminded some nights were easier to sleep than others. This was not one of those nights.

It wasn't the first time Kiran was racked with restlessness. They usually just let their mind wander about the days events, from new heroes being summoned to whatever shenanigans arose within the castle. Seeing some of the heroes meet their idols, the young manaketes playing together, and the reunion of old friends were some of the first things that come to mind. Those became many of the fond memories Kiran enjoyed replaying in their head.

But not every night was as reassuring. Despite accepting their role as summoner and tactician, Kiran couldn't help but think about one thing: Home. Sure, they were welcomed into the Kingdom of Askr by Alfonse, Sharena, and Anna, but what about before then? Could they truly call Askr home without having said goodbye to their old one? While the short time before being summoned was still fuzzy, Kiran could still remember most of their old life clear as day. Was it perfect by any means? No, but it was the hand they were dealt. It was all they knew, or at least it was until getting summoned into Askr.

In all honesty, it was terrifying at first. One minute, you're minding your business in the comfort of your own home, the next you're in the middle of some ancient ruins and a redhead declaring you the hero of their world, all while practically shaking like a leaf. There was so much to take in at once, and it wasn't helped by the fact soldiers were already out for their head despite being there for less than five minutes. It should have felt like a weird dream, but the reality became undeniable when minutes became hours, hours became days, then days into weeks. This was their life now.

It wasn't the easiest transition in the world. Kiran was never a soldier of any kind, much less seen any sort of real combat. Despite their shortcomings, Kiran was very grateful for Commander Anna's patience during training. It was grueling for sure, but the regimen was efficient and didn't completely incapacitate them after the first few sessions. Soon enough, though, Kiran was no longer falling behind, instead leading the charge whenever Askr became inevitably in trouble.

The shift from modern technologies to the humbling medieval lifestyle also needed some getting used to, but Kiran found it quite refreshing. While the luxuries of modern travel and comfort were definitely missed, it felt like a worthy trade whenever Kiran found themselves traveling alongside the Order, seeing people go about their lives and how the wildlife flourished across the land wherever they went. It was something they'd never get to experience otherwise. Still, Kiran had to remember the Order travels with purpose.

Despite enjoying all the sights and new experiences, Kiran still carried the title of "Summoner" and held all the responsibility that came with it. And that meant they still had a job to do. Even with Anna's training and their own field experience, Kiran was still far from a veteran fighter, so they rarely saw combat unless it was absolutely necessary.

Often unable to intervene due to being head tactician, it especially pained Kiran when their strategies and plans fell apart or they failed missions. Failures were rare, especially with the growing number of heroes helping out, but that's what bothered Kiran the most. They had the power to save Askr, so anything that felt like a shortcoming was crushing for them. Some days, they almost felt like they were about to crumble under all that pressure, yet still tried to put on a smile for the Order.

It was days like that that got Kiran to wonder about Askr had they not been summoned. Would Askr have fallen? Would someone else have been summoned? Would that person be a better summoner? Could a better summoner still show up and take their place? Questions like that would take up their thoughts, whether Kiran liked it or not.

But the train of thought that often stuck out the most was wondering about their life had they continued as usual, without Askr or the Order ever entering their life. It probably would've been the same as every other day. Waking up day in and day out on the same bed, the same clothes, the same room. Clock into work, clock out. Run errands and pay bills. Then, maybe if they weren't too tired, have some time to themselves and their hobbies.

Now, their old room was probably just an oversized time capsule. All their stuff right where they left it, if anything was still there. There was no way to tell if it could even be considered their room anymore. Maybe all their old belongings were already sold off, or just rotting away in some old boxes. Even if that was the case, they wouldn't know how long it's been that way.

Thinking about it, they must have been gone for a long time now, so it was inevitable to question if time flowed the same. Heroes from different times and places could be summoned, so maybe that could be factored in somehow. Alfonse's theorized that heroes would end up right back where they were just before being summoned, although there's no way to really test it. Although, that does open the possibility that time in Askr could be faster or slower compared to their old home. A day here may be a year back there or vice versa. Would that still count as time travel? Either way, all they could do was guess.

Talking about their thoughts and feelings seemed like an obvious solution, but Kiran didn't want to risk creating a misunderstanding that they wanted to leave nor make anyone unnecessarily worry. Even if they did try to sugarcoat it, they were sure most of the heroes would likely recommend talking to other summoners. Seems logical enough, all things considered, but that comes with its own fair share of problems.

Despite being aware there are other summoners, there was little way of knowing if they felt or even cared the same way they about their lives before Askr. Sure, it was reassuring they weren't the only one who could summon heroes, that other summoners exist at all, but that only went so far. Even then, it was rare to get a proper chance to talk with them, much less get into hypotheticals and recount life stories. It didn't help that often times there would be the occasional language barrier, though that should be expected, given a summoner can be from anywhere from any place from any time. That also raises questions on if they even came from the same planet. The specifics and variables of it all already made it difficult enough, and it certainly didn't help already being as socially awkward enough as is. The thought of it was already giving Kiran a headache, with a side of social anxiety.

At the end of the day, this was all Kiran could do: Think. And that fact frustrated them more than anything. The almighty summoner of legend, capable of calling upon the greatest fighters across worlds, was powerless against feeling homesick.

Now Kiran didn't hate Askr or the Order. Their time in Askr has given Kiran much to be grateful for and then some. They just couldn't shake those constant questions and 'what-ifs' that plagued their mind. Guilt build up every time they thought about how anyone would react if they knew Kiran thought this way. Still, as summoner, they needed to wake up at dawn, ready at a moment's notice. Staying up even later than they already are over their worries wouldn't help anyone.

So, like every night before this one, Kiran heavily buried those thoughts, instead focusing on the coming day and mentally preparing more strategies. Turning over, Kiran attempted to get comfortable once more, finally succeeding and beginning to drift off.

And laid to rest on the nightstand nearby was Briedablik, faintly glowing as the seductive embrace of sleep overtook the tired summoner.


A/N: First time trying a story like this, but I think it's pretty exciting to try out. Kiran's past is pretty vague since I wasn't sure on whether or not to personalize them or keep them as close to a blank slate as they are in game, but if there is support to have this Kiran stand out more, I'd be glad to see what I can do.