Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from Kim Possible are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

This chapter title is brought to you by John Ortberg. I would disagree. Looking at history the vast majority of those taking part gold rushes end up worse off than if they'd stayed home. He's expressing the philosophy of those spending the last of their grocery money on lottery tickets in hopes of making it big. But the original quote, whether it really rings true or not, applies to this chapter.

Caution Is a Helpful Strategy When You're Crossing a Minefield; It's a Disaster When You're in a Gold Rush

Kim gently shook Shego's shoulder. "Time to wake up."

"I thought we got to sleep late on Saturday," grumbled Shego.

"We could have... Except we need to talk."

"About when we go furniture shopping? Doesn't matter. About last night? You were great. Let me go back to sleep. Oh, shopping time does matter. They want me at the gym at three. Now, back to sleep."

"No, seriously... Last night was great, wasn't it?"

"Pretty sure I already said that." She pulled Kim into her arms and kissed the redhead. "We need to find things to celebrate more often."

"No... I mean, yes... I... Look, last night was the probably the best sex of my entire life and–"

"You're welcome."

"A relationship is about more than sex."

"But it can be part. We're off to a good start in that area at least."

"However, it shouldn't be the only thing in a relationship. We need to work on other things too... I think we've both admitted we've never done well in other relationships."

"I think we could even say they sucked. Which is not a good sign. We both appear to be losers."

"I don't believe that... Well, part of me is afraid that might be true. But lots of communication will help. I'll tell you my issues and you'll tell me your issues and we'll work on them together."

"Like you eating too much junk food?"

"I don't cook. We'll work on that. And before you complain about my housekeeping I'll mention that you drop–"

"I'll work on it," promised Shego.

"But we each need a big reveal this morning," announced Kim, and purred, "I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours," before turning serious. "What has been your biggest problem in earlier relationships?"

"I don't know if I want to tell you."

"Tough. I said I'd go first. My biggest problem, at least according to other women, is that, at least they say, I'm too bossy. They claim I say I'm always right and–"

"Like waking them up early on a Saturday morning to discuss the relationship?"

"Darn... I'm doing it again? I'm sorry, I just think this is so important that–"

"Kim, I haven't been here a week yet. How about we find out if we can vaguely tolerate each other before we start couples therapy?"

"I'm just saying I've been accused of wanting to take charge too much."

"You can be something of an alpha-bitch, fortunately I've got a backbone."

Kim grinned, "I know. That's a reason I'm optimistic about us."

"So, basically you think we'll work out 'cause I'll punch you in the nose if you get too pushy?"

"Something like that. That's my fear. What's yours?"

"I said I didn't want to talk about it."

"I told you mine. You have to tell me yours!"

"You're getting pushy, Cupcake."

"Sorry... I..."

Shego sighed and finally confessed, "I don't trust anyone. I blame Hego."

"You always blame him for everything. You blame him for you not trusting people?"

"He was always harping on, 'Keep your identity secret, someone will hurt mom and dad if you don't keep your identity secret'. It was, like, I couldn't talk to anyone for fear of letting something drop. And then, when I quite Team Go and... and ended up with Drakken. I couldn't really trust him. He talked about his gang as his family. Crime families don't trust each other. I mean, he might not want to get rid of me. He might feel he needed me. But I knew if there was something he really wanted he'd sacrifice me or sell me out in a minute. And I don't trust you."

"You don't trust me?"

"That's what I said. I don't trust do-gooders, saying they want to help me – but just wanting to trick me and send me to prison. And I'm scared, really scared you're just setting me up for some kind of sick revenge – get me to like you and then you'll dump me."

Kim was silent. "I'm sorry. And I don't know if there's anything I can do. I mean, I'm pushy – but you can push back. If I tell you that you can trust me you'll just think it's some kind of trap."

"Sucks being me."

"I promise to tell you the truth, whenever you ask. It's the best I can do. Maybe with time you'll trust me."

"Maybe. One hundred percent honest?"

"I'll do my best."

"Even if I ask something like, 'Does this outfit make my ass look fat?'"

"I happen to think you look incredibly sexy from any angle."

"And that's how you plan to avoid answering the question?"

"And the truth is I think you look incredibly sexy from any angle."

"What if I do get a fat ass?"

"From coaching? That'll keep you in shape."

"Athletes are in shape. Coaches can get fat asses."

"It would probably look good on you. Everything looks good on you."

"Especially you?"

"Absolutely. Now, you were going to give me a lesson in eggs this morning?"

"We'll make omelettes."

"Omelettes? That sounds kinda... Could we start with something easier?"

"I have faith in you. Now, want to shower while I get stuff out in kitchen?"

Kim hesitated, "Ah... Why don't I shower after breakfast? You know, just in case."

"Just in case? In case we have sex on the kitchen table or something?"

"Any time I'm in the kitchen, and there's anything like raw eggs, I worry I'll end wearing it."

Shego rolled her eyes, "God Almighty, Cupcake, it's a good thing you're great in the bedroom 'cause you're useless in the kitchen. And you say 'Anything is possible for a Possible'?"

"If you're gonna make fun of me for being domestically challenged I'll mention your problem with the clothes hamper."

"I asked you not to mention that."

"Then don't make fun of me. Let's go to the kitchen... Maybe I should buy an apron. A big apron, like they use in labs."

"That may be a good idea... We can look if there's time after furniture shopping."


At the end of one week Kim's omelettes had improved tremendously – each day seeing a refinement of salt content and a diminishing number of pieces of egg shell compared to the previous day.


Shego discovered the office she shared with two other part-time coaches at the gym was, essentially, a private office. Coach Pei Wang, officially retired, was rarely at the gym except for sessions with the fencing students. Professor Emily Bingley served as an assistant diving coach, but taught 19th century English Literature and maintained her regular office hours in the English Department. They seemed like decent people on the rare occasions when Shego saw them.

Dennis Plavets now greeted her enthusiastically when she came to the gym. Despite the fact Shego's initial attempt to enter the gym had been a chaotic mess Plavets had been the first person she had met at the Athletic Center and Plavets had apparently translated that, in his own mind, into giving himself credit for her working there. Even Ms Krakow had mellowed slightly. She no longer harbored a secret desire to give Shego a water bottle poisoned with strychnine. She would now have been willing to simply shove Coach Knight down a flight of stairs if no one were looking. Shego shared the honor with two other assistant coaches and one full-time coach. The facilities manager had very strict ideas about how anyone using her building should behave toward her.

Dennis Plavets and Coach Wang both attempted to persuade Shego to take up fencing. They promised it was something she and Kim would enjoy together. Shego and Kim had enough things they enjoyed doing together that the level of temptation to take up an épée or foil was almost non-existence. Shego wasn't even sure why she remembered the difference. She worried she might be losing her ability to ignore a speaker. Worst case scenario: she might suggest to Kim they try fencing.


One evening, when Shego was on the phone with her mother Kim held out her hand, indicating a wish to speak to the older woman's mom. Shego raised an eyebrow but handed the phone over. Kim grinned as asked about how clean Shego kept her room when she was a young girl, and did she put laundry in a hamper? Kim looked crestfallen by the reply.

Shego looked pleased with herself at the end of the call, "See, Cupcake, I'm not doing it just to annoy you. You can't teach an old dog new tricks."

"You're not an old dog! And you're teachable," insisted Kim.


The martial arts teams had an exhibition with the Brown teams and traveled down to Providence. Kim offered to attend, but Shego told her to study instead, "Stay here and cram. When the real competitions start I'd love to have you come – if you can."

Kim pouted, "You wouldn't love to have me come to the exhibition?"

"Of course I would," laughed Shego. "But I'm trying to be sensitive to your studies. Do you know how hard it is for me to pretend to be sensitive? I figure being sensitive now will let me put more pressure on you later."

The women did better than expected. Of course, they were only competing against Brown, but Coach Miller praised them profusely.

Judge Davis watched the exhibition from the stands. He hurried out at the end to take a selfie with Shego.

On the bus ride back to Boston Shego asked coach Miller, "The judge... Um... Big martial arts fan?"

"Big every sport fan. There may be competition or something to prove who's our greatest sports fan. Some of 'em give a lot of money. Some find other ways to show loyalty. I'm guessing the judge is really pulling for you to do well – he'll claim bragging rights for helping you get the job."


Full of confidence and/or hubris from her conquest of the egg Kim attempted to expand her cooking repertoire to dinner on nights when Shego came home later. The fire department only needed to be called once. Eventually the results could even be eaten.


"Coaching isn't keeping you busy," Kim told Shego. "You should get a job with a security company or something."

"Me? A security company? Are you feeling okay, Princess? My résumé lists thief under previous work experience."

"See, that what makes you perfect! You know how to evaluate their systems."

"I'll apply a few places, but only to prove you wrong."

After some doors were slammed in her face Shego was feeling rather smug. But two firms, after agreeing that her history made her unemployable on the regular payroll, indicated they could use her services as an independent contractor if she were interested in occasional work evaluating security systems.

Shego was not certain if she should trust the offers. Did they want her to check their security systems? Did they want her to check the security systems of competing companies to steal ideas? Could they be checking for weaknesses to sell the information to burglars? Shego called the lawyer at Legal Aide and offered to take him out for lunch with a side order of legal advice.


Kim and Shego celebrated their anniversary – their first month of living together – with such enthusiasm Kim missed a class the next morning.


Kim did well in all her classes, but it is always good to review with fellow classmates. Shego insisted Kim invite classmates over to their apartment to study. The older woman would prepare a fruit and cheese plate and maybe buy a bottle or two of wine for the study sessions. Kim's first thought was that Shego was being incredibly supportive. Kim was thrilled at the idea Shego was encouraging her. Kim's second thought was a worry. Shego had expressed a fear that Kim would meet some nice woman in law school and dump Shego. Was Shego telling Kim to invite her classmates home in order to scope out the competition? Was Shego marking Kim as her territory by the acts of hospitality? Was Shego being supportive, or were these ways her lack of trust showed itself?

Kim desperately wanted to know the truth, but was afraid to ask. She did not want to hear that Shego still didn't trust her. After several days of inner turmoil Kim eventually decided it was better to ask. Honest communication was the best chance the two women had for a relationship and Kim had promised to be honest.

"Shego?" Kim asked during a commercial break.

"Yas?"

"I'm curious about you always saying I should ask people over here to study."

"That seems an odd thing to be curious about. I think just a 'Thank you' would suffice."

"I'm wondering why."

"Why?"

"Yeah. Is it because you're a sweetheart – which you are? Or is it an example of you not trusting me – you want to make sure I'm not fooling around behind your back or something? Or, C, none of the above?"

The older woman was silent for a minute, analyzing her own feelings. "You promised to be honest with me," she reminded Kim. "I never promised to be honest with you. Remember, I'm a terrible liar."

"What does that mean?"

"That I'm stalling for time 'til the program comes back on?" Kim grabbed the remote and turned the television off. "Hey!"

"Answer the question and I turn it back on."

"Is this part of your bossy problem?"

"No, it's my wanting to make sure you're happy problem."

Shego closed her eyes and sighed. "There may be a little bit of not trusting you in there. It may be more lonely... New city for me. You're meeting interesting people at the law school and I'm meeting nobody."

"No one interesting in the athletes you're coaching?"

"Well, maybe."

"Invite them over. I promise not to be jealous. And some of the people I invite over are not interesting... George?"

"Thick glasses, so smug I want to smack him?"

"Yeah, but he knows the material and likes showing off to an audience on how well he knows it. Feel better?" Kim snuggled closer to Shego beside her on the couch. "Say yes and I'll turn the TV back on."

"Give me a kiss first, for almost being honest."


Shego didn't need to ask who Kim had called. From the number of times Kim addressed the person on the other end as "Mom" it was obvious. Everything, as Kim described it, was wonderful. Classes were going great. Life was great. Especially Sierra. She and Sierra were finding fun places to eat. Sierra was teaching her how to cook. Sierra had a wonderful sense of humor, and fashion sense, and Kim had never been happier. Shego felt like Kim was laying it on far, far too thick – and suddenly realized it probably meant that Kim still had not told her mother that Sierra was Shego's new name.

Shego tried to concentrate on the television and pay no attention as Kim spoke on the phone with her mother. It proved impossible not to listen in, at least a little, as Kim heaped praise on her.

Suddenly Kim visibly tensed, "What?" ... "Ah, yes, she's here." ... "Speak with her? I'll, ah, hand her the phone."

Shego glared at Kim as the redhead extended the phone. She shook her head 'no' vigorously and crossed her arms rather than take the phone. Kim put the phone up to Shego's ear. "She's on the phone," Kim said loudly.

"Hello? Is this Sierra?"

"Um, yes," Shego confirmed, taking the phone. "Ah, Hello... Doctor Possible?"

"Call me Anne. I'm delighted with how happy Kim sounds. She gives you the credit."

"Uh, thanks. We, um, yeah... Thanks."

"But Kim hasn't told me how the two of you met. She says you're a coach? Did you meet in the gym?"

"Er, no... I mean, yes, I'm doing some coaching – part-time. It may expand. I mean, no, we didn't meet in the gym."

"The way you two moved in together so quickly surprised me. Did you meet cute? Was it love at first sight?"

"We, uh, are taking things slow. We've agreed not to use the L-word yet."

"The L-word... Oh... I, ah, think I approve of that I'm just not used to..."

"If it makes you feel any better I'm not used to just moving in with someone like this. Kim is quite a force of nature."

"She is. Stand up for yourself."

"I will, I promise."

"Sierra, forgive me for asking – but your voice sounds slightly familiar. Have we met? And why are you as bad at Kim at avoiding telling me how you met?"

"Ooops, gotta check the stove! Here's Kim," lied Shego and passed the phone back.

"Coward," Kim whispered fiercely as Shego completed the lateral pass of the phone and dashed into the kitchen.

The floor plan of the small apartment was too open for Shego to avoid Kim's end of the phone call completely, but she stayed in the kitchen and tried hard not to listen. Even years of ignoring Drakken weren't enough to ignore everything.

It became obvious that Kim had finally identified Sierra. "But, Mom! I told you we worked great as partners on The Amazing Race!" ... "Sierra really is her name now! She had it legally changed! You didn't think Shego was her real name, did you?" ... "I didn't lie! I mean, I didn't tell you Sierra wasn't Shego. You just assumed." ... "I was going to tell you!" ... "I, uh, I'm not sure... Thanksgiving! Can she come home with me for Thanksgiving?"

The volume decreased slightly. Kim had not told Shego that she planned for the green woman to come with her to Middleton for Thanksgiving. It was clearly a case of Kim trying to take charge again. Shego considered going in to mention that Shego's mom had told her to come home for a family Thanksgiving with her family, but decided that fight could wait until later. First Kim had to survive the phone call with her own mother.

Although the volume of the phone call lessened Shego chose to remain in the kitchen considering additional 'must have' spices she hadn't already purchased. She was weighing the pros and cons of tarragon when Kim came into the kitchen and handed her the phone. "Mom wants to say something."

"Yes?"

"Shego?"

"Uh, here."

"I do not like you and Kim being together. You have tried to kill my daughter. And I don't care how many times you have also saved her life. You have tried to kill her. I might get over that in time, but I am unhappy at the moment. The offer for you to call me Anne is rescinded for the moment. But my daughter is honest. Don't you dare hold her misguided attempt spare my feelings as an example to the contrary. Kim would never, never have asked you to move in if she didn't believe the two of had a chance of happiness together. I applaud your desire to take things slowly – but don't second guess her feelings. Am I clear, young lady?"

"Yes, Doctor Possible," Shego answered meekly.

"Thank you. Now hand the phone back to Kim. I need to say goodbye."


The call cleared Shego's mind to some degree. She was able to put the idea of Kim trying to trick her largely out of her mind. She still had little confidence in their future, and she wasn't about to use the L-word, but she accepted Kim was honest in trying.

Shego mentioned that her own mother wanted Kim to come and visit for the Thanksgiving break. Shego suggested they could visit Shego's family for Thanksgiving and Kim's family for Christmas.

Kim considered it a double win! She got to prove she could compromise and looked forward to meeting Shego's mother. Shego's mother counted it as a win. She would be able to meet the woman who had helped straighten out her daughter's life. Anne Possible considered it a win. She had an additional month to prepare before it was necessary to see Kim and Shego together. If she were fortunate they might even break up before Christmas. If they were still together it might even be possible to accept the two of them as a couple. Maybe.

Shego saw no win for herself. But the former thief took such comfort as she could in the fact the martial arts squad would return early from Christmas break to resume training and she'd have to leave Middleton early rather than spending the whole break there.


Thanksgiving was everything Shego feared it would be. Shego's mother was delighted Kim had come and showered the redhead with all the stories of Shego's early life that Shego had never, never, never wanted anyone to hear. Ever.

Back in Boston, Kim crammed hard to prepare for the end of the first semester. The obnoxious George and two other women had studied with Kim until after midnight.

At 2:00 a.m. there was a pounding on the door. "Open up! It's the police."