Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, just my own characters.
"A secret remains a secret until you make someone promise never to reveal it." – Fausto Cercignani
Jacob Black
Pregnancy test.
Positive.
Pregnant.
Baby.
Nessie.
I replayed the words in my head multiple times, trying to make sense of it as I held the stick in my hand.
Nessie can't be pregnant, right?
Wait a minute...
Can she?
Oh my god!
Is she actually pregnant?
I was flabbergasted, shocked, stunned to say the least.
No words could accurately encapsulate how I felt in that moment. This wasn't how I thought finding out my mate was pregnant was supposed to feel.
I was supposed to be happy and joyful. This was a celebration right? That's how it's supposed to go. At least that's how movies portrayed it and how family and friends react to baby news.
Why was I not feeling that way? Why was I feeling the opposite of elation? Why was I instead feeling a state of disbelief and numbness? And why was there an element of frustration to the news?
"How did this even happen?" I probed, my voice finally finding itself again.
"Oh, you're asking me how it happened?" Embry laughed. "I think you and I both know how it happened."
I rolled my eyes. "I know how it happened, Embry but…We've been extra careful. Taking all the precautions! She's been taking birth control pills and I've been using protection almost all the time."
"Almost?" Embry shouted. "What do you mean almost? There were times you had unprotected sex?"
I shrugged my shoulders nervously. "C'mon – You know…she was on the pill and sometimes I didn't have a condom on standby." I uttered.
"Dude…" He sighed.
"It didn't happen all the time, though! I mostly always wore protection." I said, my voice still in disbelief and distress.
How – Oh how could this be?
I looked back down at the pregnancy test that was still in my hands. I was still in pure shock.
I swore we were careful all the times we did it. Did the condom break the times we did it? Did Nessie forget to take her pill one morning? So many theories were swarming in my head.
We hadn't had sex ever since we made the pact two weeks ago that we would wait for our actual wedding night to do the conjugal duty of penetrative coitus. I mean…we weren't total prudes though. We have been doing other things since then that sort of compensated for that but it was mostly just foreplay, we stopped immediately when things got too heavy in order to live up to our agreement.
The last time we had full blown sex was our anniversary night.
Two weeks.
To the day.
Can a woman get pregnant that fast? Was two weeks a normal timeframe for women to find out they were pregnant? Was that a normal gestation period for a human?
But Nessie wasn't a human. Not quite.
Dammit.
She was on the pill.
She was meant to be on the pill.
She had to have been on the pill.
I collapsed onto the couch and held my throbbing head in my hand.
Dammit! Now I've got a headache.
"She was on the pill!" I exclaimed in frustration.
Embry groaned and began to rub his temples in exasperation. "You do know birth control has a 97% success rate right?"
I glared at him. "What?"
Embry's eyes bulged. "You do know that birth control isn't always 100% effective, right?"
I paused as I thought. "Yeah – Yeah I knew about that." I said, although my voice didn't sound sure as I suddenly began tapping my foot restlessly.
I just assumed 97% was good odds. It was good odds! We've never had an issue on the rare occasions we didn't use condoms so I just don't understand how this could happen?
I stared at the test again.
Pregnant.
Okay! So this was real! This wasn't just my imagination. That word on the stick wasn't just an illusion.
Shit.
"Did you plan to knock Nessie up, dude?" He asked with a chuckle as he walked into the kitchen to grab a packet of Lays crisps.
I narrowed my eyes at him. "Does it look like I planned for this to happen?" I snarled at him.
He chuckled. "No – I just wanted to know if kids were part of your plans for the future."
"Well, yeah...We have discussed having children one day and yes we do want them someday but we didn't want them this soon. We planned to have them after we got married, y'know; like between the next five years or in decades." I told him.
Embry nodded. "You're screwed, dude! She's in high school!" He spoke softly, but it sounded like he was shouting, scolding me for being an idiot.
"I know!" I shrieked in response. "This wasn't the plan, Embry." I reiterated.
He sighed. "I know," He simply responded as his face dropped.
We weren't ready for a kid!
Not right now!
I wasn't ready because I knew I couldn't afford to have a kid right now. I only just got to a point in my career where I was stable. I had a stable income now and I was also just starting out with my business venture; I hoped I would hit the ground running on that before bringing a kid into the world.
Nessie and I were also just recently engaged; we haven't even lived together yet so how can we possibly bring a kid into this world when we haven't even enjoyed some time alone together.
Also, I did not even think I was ready to be a dad yet. I loved kids and I knew I wanted them but was I cut out to be a dad, right now? I don't know. I always thought I would know when I was prepared to become a father, I haven't had that feeling yet.
Fuck! This is my fault!
I took full responsibility for this because this could have all been avoided if I had some form of self-control. Darn me and my horny brain! If I hadn't given into my animalistic urges maybe we wouldn't be in this mess.
Shit!
Crap!
Did Nessie even want to have a kid now?
She was in high school – Holy crap! What have I done?
Nessie is just on the verge of graduation and she was on the cusp of starting her college career. She was so excited for this new adventure in her life.
Planning the wedding was already going to be stressful enough for her, now we had to add a baby into the mix? Mega-stress!
She would feel there was no choice but to put off college for a while to raise the kid and that's not what I wanted for her.
She's probably pissed at me!
Not to mention, if Edward and Bella found out I knocked up their teenage daughter, they'd have my head for breakfast, lunch and dinner!
Edward in fact would go as far as to castrate me before he chopped my head off.
He specifically asked I hold off on knocking his only daughter up until we were married and I agreed with him because that was the plan.
That was supposed to be the plan.
And now I broke that agreement.
And I have to suffer the consequences.
Dammit!
Edward and Bella would be mad. Nessie would be mad. I would be mad.
Either way I was fucked.
What have I done?
Shit!
This cannot be my life!
If Nessie was pregnant…
What kind of kid would we have?
Would it be more vampire? Would it be more wolf? Would it be more human? Would it be some amalgamation of everything and we end up with some crazy, freaky abomination?
Did we just spawn the baby from Alien 3?
I shuddered at the thought of the baby killing Nessie like it almost did Bella. Would Nessie even survive such an intense pregnancy?
Frickin' hell!
Now I was petrified.
This was unknown territory. Carlisle and Edward were still studying mine and Nessie's genetics and researching on the various possibilities and outcomes if and when we did decide to reproduce.
What if it was supernatural?
What if it was a human child?
What if it was a human with a birth defect?
Was I ready to shoulder that kind of extra responsibility of caring for a child who had some type of disability? Was I emotionally prepared to care for a child at all?
I had no idea.
I guess I was gonna find out soon enough right?
Hehe.
Jokes.
This was no laughing matter.
But instinctively, a soft non-humorous chuckle escaped my lips as I rubbed my temples as I felt the pang of pain from my headache throbbing and pounding harder.
I was frozen in my spot as I played these questions and hypothetical theories in my brain. I was grappling with each possible worst case scenario and it seemed like the more I thought about it, the more incongruous it got.
"I should probably call her," I suddenly spoke.
"No! Do not call her!" Embry dismissed. "Wait until she gets back home to talk to her about this. Just wait until she tells you. Confronting her about it now will just freak her out and just make matters worse,"
I nodded. He was right. If she wanted to tell me, I should at least give her the opportunity to tell me when she was absolutely ready.
"Maybe with her gone for the weekend, you can actually let some of this news sink in for a bit because when she's back she's gonna want support from you. Whatever she chooses to decide. She would want to know you are there for her. It's important that you are there for her, Jake." Embry stated with a sense of unequivocal finality, almost like a combination of a request and an order.
Embry loved Nessie like she was his little sister. He looked out for her and had her best interest at heart which I was glad to know.
For all his less than great attributes when it comes to women, he sure cared a lot about the women in his life. He respected them deeply and strived to treat them well – because he had genuine love for them.
But he's still a man-whore don't get it twisted.
"Yeah – Of course I will, Em." I scoffed, questioning why he would even think I wouldn't be supportive of her.
I have spent almost a decade of my life ensuring that Nessie knows I would be there for her and protect her no matter what.
"Wait – What do you mean 'whatever she chooses to decide'?" I asked.
Embry walked up to me and took a seat on my recliner chair that was across from my couch.
"Whether she decides to keep the baby or not." He told me. "She may not want to keep the baby,"
I thought.
I didn't consider that.
Is Nessie the kind of person who would terminate a pregnancy? From all the conversations we've had about kids, she sounded like she couldn't wait to be a mom one day. But that was with the understanding that when the time was right she'd be happy to be a mother.
This was not an ideal time.
Did I have a say in the matter?
Oh boy…
Two things were for certain:
If Ness went through with the pregnancy, then we'd have an unplanned kid we were responsible for, for the rest of our lives.
If she didn't want the baby then we wouldn't have a potential kid we were responsible for but then we'd have this wondering feeling of what could have been. At least I will.
I don't know how I felt about either decisions myself yet so now we've got another thing to talk about.
I know I want whatever she wanted so I would go along with whatever she chose to decide to do and I'd make sure she knew I would support her because at the end of the day, it was her body but it was still not an easy decision for anyone to make.
"Dude, I literally don't know what to do." I whirred in frustration as I cupped my entire head in my palms.
"It's gonna be okay, man." Embry said comfortingly, patting my arm.
He was always a voice of reason in my life. There was a reason he was my best friend and why he and I got along so well. He knew me better than anyone – outside of Nessie of course.
He was also way smarter than I was so he gave me sound advice on many crucial decisions in my life. He was quite literally my wingman.
"Goddammit – Are we sure it actually said pregnant? Did we read right?" I demanded.
I dragged my head from my hands to look at the test one more time to be sure I didn't hallucinate what I witnessed.
Blue.
Blue.
Blue.
Pregnant.
Yep. She was pregnant.
Maybe I should finally accept it, huh?
I'm gonna be a dad!
Whelp!
Whew!
I felt a soft curve form at the corner of my lips as those five words appeared in my brain and images began swirling in my head as the thought of a small child seared into my mind.
A child that looked like Nessie and me, but more so Nessie because she was so beautiful.
A little kiddo could be running around in nine months.
The slight curve on my lips dropped again as I suddenly remembered how much raising a baby would cost –financially and physically.
We'd need strollers, cribs, baby clothes, diapers, a nursery, baby food and so much other stuff. We'd obviously need a bigger place to keep all that stuff in because there was no way we could raise a kid in my apartment with my rowdy neighbors and my small non-kid friendly rooms so we'd have to move out pretty soon and houses just aren't cheap right now.
And I'm just going off on all the stuff I know from talking to Sam and seeing it with my sister and Paul.
Forget about sleep.
Forget about a social life.
Forget about my sex life.
Jeez…
Could I make it work?
If I took the new job, I think I could totally be able to support a family.
I guess the job offer came at an opportune time in my life.
Thank the gods for that.
"Wait a minute," Embry exclaimed, standing up to begin pacing around the room.
I looked up at him through my apprehensive eyes after I set the ClearBlue on the coffee table.
"Are we even sure it's Nessie's test though?" He asked.
I furrowed my brows. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, there's a distinct possibility it's someone else's, right?" Embry expounded.
"I've only ever slept with Nessie, Embry." I sighed.
My brain was too jumbled up right now to even have a frank, coherent and/or decent conversation right now.
He rolled his eyes and groaned at me. "No, you idiot! I'm talking about one of us." He illustrated.
I looked over into open space, thinking and thinking; rattling my brain to think of other possibilities.
"Did you have anyone over here recently?" I questioned Embry.
He roared in laughter. "Dude – I cover my shit up! I don't leave trails like you do. Trust me, I would never allow a mistake like that to happen to me." He chuckled, speaking confidently.
I grunted. "Whatever," I grumbled.
I pondered on that theory some more. Who else could it be then?
The only other possible person who the test could belong to was…
"Alex…" I confirmed.
Embry darted his head at me and his eyes bulged at the realization as he slipped his beer bottle out of his mouth mid-drink.
"Crap – Well, on the bright side! At least Nessie might not actually be pregnant after all?" He laughed with a mouthful of beer as he expressed the silver lining.
As if on cue, the door subsequently came to an open and Seth entered the apartment with a heavy sigh.
"Man – It's been pouring out there!" He exhaled as he slipped his satchel off his body and hung it over the rack, followed by his hooded jacket and scarf.
I quickly snatched the stick off the coffee table and shoved it in my pocket.
Seth caught this and frowned as he looked back at me wth a funny, curious facial expression.
"Okay – What was that?" He scoffed.
I smiled to him slightly. "How was work, dude?" I ignored the question.
He sighed. "Terrible. I've got 110 student essays to grade still and I've been missing Alex and she's only been gone for like eight hours and 38 minutes." He breathed.
I nodded. "I feel you there, buddy." I moaned.
"Oh! Don't start with the mushy shit, guys!" Embry warned.
Seth laughed, shaking his head at Embry as he walked over to the kitchen.
"Somebody's in a mood," He said as he opened the refrigerator door. "Ooh! Food!" He exclaimed as he grabbed the In-N-Out takeout paper bag.
Embry and I shared a look with each other. We had to have the conversation with Seth. Either one of our significant others could be pregnant so it was only fair that he knew what the hell was going on.
I cocked an eyebrow at him, hoping he agreed with me.
He shrugged his shoulders in response to me.
I guess I'll take that as an agreement.
"Hey, Seth." I began as I stood up. "Listen….Um…Em and I found something in the bathroom when we got back from work."
"Uh huh?" Seth asked as he opened the box and shoved some fries in his mouth.
I breathed a heavy breath. "Look, don't panic just yet! It probably has nothing to do with you but we found a pregnancy test in the trashcan underneath some cotton swabs and wipes." I spoke, pulling the stick out of my pocket and setting it on the counter.
Seth's chewing motion slowed down to a halt as his eyes landed on the blue pregnancy test.
"It's not mine!" He stated.
Embry chuckled.
I grunted. "No it's not but it could be Nessie's or… Alex's." I spoke.
His eyes turned away from the test and onto me, lingering on as he heard his imprint's name escape my lips.
I could hear his heartbeat race as he began processing the information in his head.
He was shocked.
Yup! Been there dude.
"I see…" He said after a long while.
I nodded.
"And it's positive?" He asked further.
I sighed, lifting the test up and showing him the positive sign and the additional digital 'Pregnant' word on it.
He exhaled another shaky, unnerving breath.
"Like I said, it's probably Nessie's test because we did have unprotected sex a couple of weeks ago so it's likely my problem but I thought you should at least know first just in case." I told him, attempting to ease some of his nerves.
"Still think it was stupid of you, though. Just for the record," Embry expressed, leaning against the counter.
I groaned. "Yes. Thank you, Embry for that." I replied, sardonically as I sighed and glared at him.
I was well aware of my carelessness. I didn't need for Embry of all people –the King of Womanizers – to rub it in my face or remind me of it every second.
Seth wasn't as amused as Embry nor was he as accepting as I was. He was still in a state of respited shock.
Wait…Could Alex actually be pregnant?
"You and Alex have been careful right?" I demanded.
He looked up at me with eyes filled with unparalleled fear and fright.
Uh oh.
Well shit!
… …
Renesmee Cullen
The senior hike ended rather quickly than I expected. To be fair, I had a lot on my mind to even notice we had been going on for over four hours. I could have gone on for four more hours if I had the chance.
Hiking and jogging was a good time for me to think and recharge my batteries. I especially needed it after the news Alex informed to me about in regards to my mother and Jacob's history.
I still couldn't believe it.
They didn't just lie to me about the extent of their relationship before I was born.
They withheld so much information from me.
And for what?
What was the actual reason?
I was determined to find out though.
I just…
I don't know if I was ready to confront either of them about it yet.
Maybe because I was afraid to get hurt?
I was comfortable in my state of rage and frustration at the moment. Once I actually got hurt by it was a different story all together.
I don't think I'd ever recover for this.
My mother and my fiancé?
In love?
With each other?
Before I was even in the picture?
Was it so intense that they had to keep the nature of their friendship a secret from me for almost nine years?
I honestly don't know what to think or how to feel anymore. Rage? Pain? Confusion? Betrayal?
"…Nessie!" I suddenly heard the exclamation and nudge of Alex, pulling me out of my train of thought.
I glanced at her but my facial expression was blank.
"Oh, Nessie! Earth to Nessie!" She called, snapping her fingers at me. "You've been out of it for a while now. Are you okay?"
"Hmm?" I hummed. "Um…Yeah, I'm fine." I simply responded although I didn't sound completely sure.
Alex didn't look convinced.
I sighed as I stood in front of her, my hands on my hips and looked away from her. I was not in the mood to explain my current mood to anyone.
"Nessie, about yesterday –" Alex began but she was swiftly cut off by the loud sound of the whistle.
"Hustle up!" Coach Flak shouted after blowing his whistle. "Did you kids enjoy the hike?"
There was a chorus of weak, monotonous cheers, remarks and applause from the exhausted and physically fried students as we stood at the campsite entrance.
"Where is Stone?" Coach Hoffman interjected.
Alex and I scanned the group of kids and sure enough, Felicity was missing.
Where did she go?
How did she slip out from us undetected?
Why would she just disappear?
"Maybe a cougar or wolf ate her," Melissa chuckled.
I narrowed my eyes at her.
"That's not funny, Melissa," Lissa mentioned quietly, not trying to domineer her master but still attempting to stick up for her old friend who was always nice to her.
"What?" Melissa shrugged off the disapproving looks.
"Don't be an idiot! There are no wolves in California, Melissa!" Luke fired back, but sneakily gave Justin a wink.
Some students chuckled and he earned a glared from Melissa in return.
"Well…Can someone call her phone?"
I quickly pulled my phone out of my back pocket and speed dialed Felicity's cell.
After multiple rings, all I heard was her voicemail.
I hung up the phone and shook my head. "No answer." I said.
Okay…Now I was worried.
"Did anyone speak to Felicity before she disappeared?" Coach Flak asked us.
I looked over to Alex who shrugged her shoulders whilst the students conversed among themselves, asking when and who saw her last.
"She and I were running together but I just assumed she was following me. I got distracted with Justin and Luke." Alex whispered to me. "We have to find her."
I agreed with a nod. "Yes. But we can't do it with the entire senior class. We don't know if something supernatural happened to her," I raised my eyebrow at her.
She hummed, nodding in response. "Right!"
"Okay! We have to search for her!" Coach Hoffman announced. "Coach Flak and I will lead a search party. Mrs. Friedman will take over for us if we don't make it back in time for brunch. Understood?"
I raised my hand up.
"Yes, Cullen!" Coach Flak pointed to me.
"I think Alex and I know where she might have gone," I said, looking over to Alex for assistance.
She bobbed her head. "Yes! We can find her, if that's okay with you?"
"It's not safe to go out on your own," Coach Hoffman.
"We won't be alone!" I quickly responded. I looked over to Justin. "Um…Justin, Luke and Rea also know where she is so they'll come with us!"
"We won't be long, we promise!" Alex added.
Coach Hoffman and Coach Flak shared a look before reluctantly agreeing to let us go.
"Okay! Be back before brunch." Coach Hoffman stated.
Oh! That might not be enough time to find her.
"Can we possibly extend it to later? We know where she is…It's just a bit far?" I said with a convincing, encouraging smile.
Flak and Hoffman sighed; the fact that I sounded like I knew where she was allowed them to have the window to care a little less about it and not concern themselves too much about it. They already had to worry about the other students.
"Fine! Before dinner time the latest then which will be at sunset. If you're not back by then, we'll send a search party. Got it?" Flak emphasized.
Alex and I nodded.
"Okay! Back to camp!" Flak whistled.
"We'll meet again for brunch after you all recuperate and take your showers or whatever. We meet back at 11:15am sharp! All good?" Coach asked the rest of the students.
They all nodded.
Thereafter, all the students dispersed and headed to their individual tents to prepare for the rest of the day.
Justin and Luke immediately approached us.
"Do you really know where Felicity is?" Luke questioned frantically.
I shook my head. "Not really but we can't let the teachers know that because we don't know if her disappearance is linked to the supernatural yet." I said.
Justin sighed. "Okay – Where do we start? Do we split up?"
I thought it over. "I think we can split up to cover more ground. I have a lock on her scent. Do you?" I asked Justin.
He nodded.
"Great! Maybe you, Luke and Rea can head east while Alex and I head west?" I suggested, glancing back at Alex who seemed to have tapped out mentally and physically from the conversation.
"What are we gonna do if we meet someone that's y'know, weird? Someone like Cassia?" Rea asked. "And what will we do? I mean most of us are human."
"Yeah, we can't defend ourselves from a homicidal vampire." Luke added.
Cassia…
What if Cassia got to Felicity?
What would Cassia even want with Felicity in the first place?
"I can help!" A soft, syrupy voice reached my ears.
I very nearly bit my tongue in instant unadulterated irritation before I spun around on my heel to see the beautiful, blonde, meadow green eyed girl.
"Um…No! We're good! Actually…But thanks for offering though." I said with a mustered up fake smile.
"Uh… Actually, we could use the extra set of heightened senses." Justin interjected as he gave Jennifer a small, encouraging smile.
I shut my eyes slightly as I tried to calm myself down before fluttering them up again.
"You can go with Rea, heading north and I guess Alex and Nessie can head west together?" Justin took the lead.
"Keep your phones on you at all times so one of us can reach each other when we find her. Got it?" Justin added.
Everyone seemed to be agreeable as people began huddling up with who they were tagging along with.
"Excuse me," Jennifer whispered as she breezed past me, leaving a whiff of her scent in my nostrils.
I exhaled a sigh as I closed my left hand into a fist.
There was no reason for her to make my blood pressure so high!
Why was I so annoyed by her?
Did it have to do with her specifically?
Or did it have to do with my deep-seated insecurities about women? Specifically, women who intimidate me.
I don't know.
I really don't know.
"I need to grab my weapons." Alex announced in a whisper to me as the groups scattered.
I turned to her. "You brought them here?!" I demanded.
She shrugged. "In case I needed them – which I clearly do."
I sighed. Of course. A huntress can never be too cautious I guess.
"Okay. Guys, we're heading back to our tent to get something quick." I told the party.
"Cool," Justin gave me a thumbs up. "Let's go, guys!" He told the group.
I shifted my attention back onto Alex.
"What did you bring?" I asked as we began heading to our tent.
"My miniature compound crossbow and daggers." She told me. "And my brass…and my arrow heads…And my –"
"Okay! I get it!" I scoffed as I cleaved my arm around her and dragged her to our tent.
As we entered our tent and Alex charged for her weapons, Gina emerged from our makeshift kitchen with an apple.
"I thought you guys would be already on your way to look for Felicity." She stated.
"Um…Yeah we are!" I nodded, looking over to Alex who squinted back at me. I cocked an eyebrow, sending her a message to be discrete.
She nodded her head in reply.
"Uh…Alex just forgot her phone so we're just getting that." I said with a convincing smile.
Gina nodded her head. "I wanna help?"
I stared at her and deliberated for a second before shaking my head slightly.
"I don't know, Gina! I think we're good. We're gonna find her soon anyway," I said optimistically, but even I couldn't lie to myself convincingly.
"Look – I know I'm not part of the core friend group or anything and I know you all have a history but I do want to be part of it in some way, I guess? Just let me help. I promise I won't be in the way." She expressed.
I inhaled a breath as I flicked my eyes back to Alex who slipped weapons bag over her back and slid a few daggers into her holster underneath her leggings without Gina looking.
She shrugged her shoulders.
I turned back to Gina. "Okay. Thanks, sure. Um…It'll be great help, actually. You'll have to tag along with us though because the rest have already left."
She beamed brightly. "Great!"
I smiled as I laid my hand on her arm and gave her a comforting, grateful rub before walking over to my side of the tent to retrieve my grey shawl collar jacket and shrugged it on.
"Let's go." I said, gesturing to the girls to head out.
Alex slipped a dagger in my hand when Gina didn't notice. Apparently the daggers were laced with wolfsbane and paralyzing agents that worked on vampires (or werewolves) when sliced. The dagger was also stronger than tungsten which allowed it to be impenetrable to vampire's hardened, marble-like skin.
God I hope this didn't have to come to a battle with the unknown.
I hope we will find Felicity.
And I hoped she was unharmed and safe and sound wherever she was.
… …
Felicity Stone
I don't know how it happened.
But I did it.
I regained some semblance of consciousness.
However, it wasn't without a cost.
The heavy, panging spasm of pain in my head almost knocked me out again but I barely managed to recuperate.
A relief, I guess?
I fluttered my eyes open steadily, my vision blurred as I saw the vague image of a tall, dark figure moving about. I winced at the pain the action caused to my head but I still attempted to persevere as I closed my eyes and opened them again, trying to blink my way to increase my range of vision.
The world around me was spinning on top of it being so blurry and unattainable.
The dark figure suddenly disappeared.
Subsequently, I started regaining some of my other senses such as my hearing because I could hear the soft, musical sounds of the radio playing The Police – Every Breath You Take in the background.
Fitting.
Afterwards, I began regaining my ability of touch as I felt myself laying against a non-so-comfortable single bed with a cover drawn up to my chest.
Another spasm of pain hit me as I attempted to move my body.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," A very deep, low, alarming yet alluring voice called as I heard the loud footsteps of a boot sole enter the room again.
My blurred vision suddenly began subsiding to a point where I could actually see and I got an even clearer view of the mysterious figure that stood multiple feet away from me.
He had his back turned towards me.
I could see that he was wearing fuchsia and black pants, a dark navy plaid flannel that he rolled up to his elbows at the sleeves –showcasing some of his many tattoos– and knee high boots that I can only describe as being a staple that a rockstar favored; what with it being dark with several laces and buttons and zips with a heeled sole.
His striking silver-grey hair was tied up in a low, disheveled ponytail that reached the collar of his dark flannel.
I moved my attention away from him to examine my surroundings.
I didn't know where the hell I was but it was definitely not the Four Seasons. It looked like an abandoned cabin or something; what with the wooden walls and floors, brittle and dirty glass windows and wooden beams that covered most of the ceiling.
But it wasn't dirty enough that it wouldn't be uninhabitable I guess. It just…didn't seem conducive enough to be a safe house.
This wasn't a safe place from the vampires who came after me.
By now they're probably out hunting for me…
I don't exactly remember why though.
I just knew I was running away from vampires.
That's all I remembered.
I vaguely remember what the vampires looked like even though I had a feeling they were familiar to me.
My eyes skirted back onto the mysterious, dark figure who was moving around as he grabbed some beakers, a mug and a swelteringly hot steamer.
I didn't know how long I was out.
I didn't know how I got here.
But I had to find out.
"W-where am I?" I strained as my voice barely escaped the words in a quiet, monotone tone.
The mysterious man didn't reply to my probing question which earned a frown from me as I glanced down at my body covered underneath the sheet.
I lifted it up slightly and lowered the sheet down a little bit, not without wincing at the action, to see I was wearing an oversized denim shirt over my body and nothing below but my underwear.
Theories suddenly swarmed my brain as I looked back at the man in pure fear and terror.
"I—I –I have to get out of here." I croaked in an uncomfortable whisper as I tried to lift myself up and leaned my back against the wall.
I winced at the action, the pain not coming from my head this time but my leg and my arm.
"Don't move! That'll only make the pain worse!" He told me off, scolding me like I was a pet of his.
I didn't appreciate his tone but I didn't protest because I suppose he was right.
Maybe I should stay put?
I don't know.
But I knew I had to get out of here soon though.
I didn't feel safe here.
I also didn't feel safe out there.
So now what?
Hmm…
Screw it! If I made a run for it now, by the grace of god maybe I can make it out of here alive.
Who knows who this random guy was?
He could be a predator!
He could be a serial killer.
Maybe I had better luck outside with a bunch of homicidal vampires.
…I don't know.
I attempted to lift my right arm to roll up my sleeve to examine my injuries and I noticed I had a gauze wrapped around it with a prominent bloodstain that was mostly hidden behind the layers.
What the hell happened to me?
I wasn't usually a klutz.
I took ballet and a few years of gymnastics –that's where Alex and I became friends when we were in elementary school – so I should be more careful.
But then I began getting flashbacks of myself running through the woods and tumbling over a big log where I found myself scraping my arm, knee and slicing a part of my thigh and my palms.
I glanced at my palms and just as I thought, I had a bandage wrapped around them as well. I groaned as I began wriggling my feet underneath the covers before I flipped it over to the side to reveal my bandaged thigh and kneecap; my patella bone as I felt my tendon twinge.
"Felicity, is it?" I heard my name called.
I glared at him as he called me.
"How do you know my name?" I questioned.
He didn't answer immediately.
"Are you deaf? How the hell do you know my name?" I questioned with more force although the pain in my leg caused me to whine in response.
"I said… Don't move!" He shouted, as he finally turned around to look at me.
And there he was.
The man I had locked eyes with at the hospital parking lot a few weeks ago was standing before me. His unsettlingly attractive face was now facing mine and I could see him clearer now; his nose, ears and lip were impaled with rings, the left part of his neck that peaked out of his flannel collar was covered in inked tattoos that trickled down to his chest whilst the right side remained unblemished.
My stomach turned into knots, as I felt the familiar feeling I felt when I first laid eyes on him, stir inside me again.
"Who are you?" I questioned.
As I thought I was about to get my answer, I flinched as I heard the sound of leaves rustling which consequently got me on high alert.
"Hey! It's okay," He expressed, but his tone wasn't comforting at all. "It's just a raccoon."
I looked at him again.
"You're safe here." He assured me.
I shook my head. If only he knew what was lurking around these woods.
"No!" I fired. "I'm not – We're not safe anywhere!"
He sighed as he looked at me for a little while before turning his body back around to pour some water into a mug before spinning around again and bringing it to me, shifting the mini coffee table forward to my side and placing the mug on it.
"Here," He said. "Drink."
I cocked my eyebrow at him, my facial expression, uncertain.
"What is it?" I asked.
"I'm not going to kill you. If I wanted to, I would've." He told me.
"How am I supposed to trust you?" I asked.
I expected him to give me some impassionate speech about what a kind, thoughtful man he was and to basically reassure me that he wasn't bad.
"You shouldn't trust me," He simply replied. "Now…Drink."
I don't know how or why but I immediately did as I was told.
There was something about his forceful nature that just compelled me to do what he said, no matter my rational reservations.
I reached for the mug and took it in my hands, giving it a small whiff. It smelled like a mixture of herbs.
I took a sip of it. It tasted like a unique tea blend that reminded me of one of my grandmother's herbal remedies.
He walked back into the sort of kitchen and began preparing something.
"How do you know my name?" I asked again, hoping he'd now respond truthfully and not evade the topic.
He sighed. "Your bracelet." He responded.
I glanced back down at my wrist to see the friendship bracelets Nessie, Alex, Rea and I made with our names on each stack. I commissioned it for all of us as a senior year gift to all of us at the start of the new school year.
My name had the bigger charms which differentiated myself from the others – the other girls had similar distinguishable anecdotes to their friendship bracelets.
"What's your name?" I asked further.
He spun around to look at me and gave me a scoff.
"My name's Lloyd. Lloyd Dunhill." He responded in a thick British-European accent that was admittedly very attractive.
"How did you find me? Where am I?" I asked more questions.
He grumbled. "I found you unconscious and bleeding in the middle of the road on the highway. You were pretty frazzled." He stated.
I scrutinized the way he moved. The way he reached for the knife, the way he used it to spread over the bread and his forearm muscles clenching and contracting at the motion.
"How long have I been in here?" I asked.
"Goodness – The questions! They're never-ending," He grumbled in a stern tone.
Did he change me out of my clothes?
I peeked through the denim shirt I had on to see I was still wearing my bra on.
Okay.
So he has seen me without my clothes on.
I don't know how I felt about that if I was being honest.
I didn't think I had to time or energy to react to knowing that information.
"W-where are my clothes?" I whispered, tiredly as I scanned the vicinity.
"Like I said, you were bleeding out so it looked like they needed a wash." He expressed.
I stared at the elusive, mysterious man with confusion and curiosity but I didn't let myself get too worked up about it too much. I just needed to get out of here.
"How long was I out?" I asked with a cough.
"You've been out for six hours," He announced to me.
My eyes bulged in shock.
Six hours?
"Omigosh! My friends are probably worried six!" I said as I skimmed my eyes around, looking for my phone. "Where's my phone?"
He looked over to the kitchen table where my phone was plugged into the charge.
"Your friends have been calling you non-stop. I had to send them a message to let them know you were safe."
"Am I really safe?" I probed.
He didn't answer.
Figures.
Wait – How did he even access my phone to even text them back? I had a lock on my phone.
But then I realized, he probably used facial recognition or my fingerprint to unlock my iPhone.
When he was done with whatever he was doing in the kitchen, he sauntered over to me in a very domineeringly intimidating gait.
He was really tall. Not as tall as Nessie's boyfriend Jacob –who I thought was the tallest man I had ever seen – but he was pretty close.
He was almost as tall as Ray Parker if I had to hazard a guess. Mostly around the 6'5 ballpark.
He set the plate with a ham and cheese whole grain sandwich in front me.
"You should eat." He demanded in a forceful tone.
I darted my eyes at him at his domineering tone.
"Why?" I demanded, using the same forceful tone.
"You've got to get your strength back." He simply responded. "Eat." He commanded as he gestured to the plate with the sandwich.
I stared at the plate then back at him; his piercing, unsettling yet strangely alluring icy, gunmetal, turquoise-blue eyes peering right into my soul.
I gnawed my bottom lip as I self-consciously glanced back out the window then over to him again.
"Why did you bring me here?" I questioned.
His eyes bored into mine even deeper in this intense gaze that almost turned my knees to jelly with weakness and anxiousness.
"I saved your life," He stated.
I snorted, but it came out as a moan as another spasm hit my head.
"Ah!" I cried as my hand flew to my head.
The mysterious, tattooed man shot up and went over to grab a cloth and rinsed it with hot water before grabbing an icepack in the small fridge before returning and handing them both to me.
I reluctantly took them and immediately placed the warm cloth against my skull and then the icepack on my knee.
He grabbed a chair and pulled it right in front me.
He immediately grabbed my wounded leg and set it on his thigh.
He sure didn't respect boundaries.
I winced in pain as his fingers touched my bruised knee. He reached for a pair of scissors in his drawers and synthetized medical alcohol and a surgical medicine kit before he began cutting up my bandage.
"What are you doing?" I cried out as the pain hit me hard.
"You're bleeding out," He said, flipping his scissors. "This is gonna hurt,"
I nodded as I grinded my teeth against my skin as my hand flew to my mouth, my teeth enclosed around my bandaged hand to lessen the pain.
As Lloyd cut open my used gauze to reveal the bloody, gooey and sliced part of my leg.
"You fractured your kneecap and tore your ligament," He informed me. "And that's just on top of getting sliced open."
I flinched at the pain as the blood oozed out of my knee.
"You must've had a nasty fall, huh," He said, looking at me with a small curve on his cornered lip.
The attempted smirk was not full but it was the first genuine emotion he had shown to me ever since I woke up and god did it make me weak.
He pulled off the used, bloody bandage and disposed it into the trash before some water to clean the blood before grabbing a medicine wipe and coated it with the synthetic, antiseptic medicinal alcohol and dabbed it over my bruises.
"Ah!" I wailed multiple times as he cleaned up my wound.
He dabbed some disinfectant on my skin beforehand; he snatched a needle stick and looked at me with a flirtatious smirk yet again.
"You're not afraid of needles, are you?" He asked, pulling my leg closer to him and right underneath his arm.
My stomach turned into knots again as butterflies erupted at the pit of my abdomen.
I gnawed my bottom lip and shook my head, not trusting my voice.
Thenceforth, he threaded the needle and pierced my skin, causing me to whimper and weep quietly. He then began stitching me up after my cries subsidized.
"Where are you from?" I asked him.
"Out of town," He responded vaguely.
I rolled my eyes at him and looked out through to the window.
"Do you remember what happened to you?" He asked as he continued stitching me up.
I shook my head.
"I don't remember what happened to me. I was getting chased and then…Nothing. I found myself here with a random guy who picked me up off the street."
He chuckled slightly.
I looked at him again, examining his features further.
He was very handsome but his edginess to him made him ruggedly attractive. Like…He wasn't clean cut.
He was almost reptilian with his strong features, sharp eyes, sharp jaw and straight nose. His face was only rounded ever so slightly to give an illusion of someone who could be approachable once you got to know him but still…you shouldn't get too close.
He looked like a tortured rock star who has done more bad than good.
And I hate that it was so outrageously attractive.
"Done," He said after cutting off the thread.
I stared at my stitched up knee. It looked decent.
"I suppose you expect me to thank you?" I teased.
He glared at me. "No." He said, dropping my leg down gently and standing up. "You don't need to thank me,"
I watched as he gathered his medical supplies and shoved them back into his backpack.
"Thank you anyway, though." I stated.
He looked at me at the corner of his eyes and curved his lips only slightly.
I suddenly thought of my friends.
Nessie!
Alex!
Oh, no!
I needed to call them as soon as possible!
I needed to let them know I was okay.
"Can I have my phone, please?" I asked sweetly.
Lloyd sighed as he walked over to retrieve my phone from charge and handed it back to me.
I smiled back as I took the phone from his hand, our fingers touching ever so slightly which ignited a series of convulsions that lasted only a millisecond. Not even he noticed.
There was definitely an edge to him.
I couldn't quite put my finger on it yet.
But he felt…
Out of this world.
I dialed Nessie's number and she answered on the second ring.
"Good heavens! Felicity! Is that you?" She questioned frantically, her voice filled with concern.
I smiled. "Yeah – It's me."
"Thank god!" She exhaled a sigh of relief. "We were worried sick! We were starting to think you had been abducted!"
"By Cassia!" Alex added in a whisper to Nessie.
Lloyd's head immediately darted towards me at the mention of the name. I didn't know who it was. Maybe they'd fill me in on that later.
" Alex and I and the gang have been looking everywhere for you!" Nessie said.
"I'm okay – Sorry I disappeared on you guys like that. I just got held up but I'm fine." I told them.
"Where are you?" Alex asked me over the line.
"Um…" I looked up to see Lloyd's back turned towards me. "Not far. I—I think I'll be back at the campsite before nightfall." I told them.
"You sure you don't want us to come find you?" Nessie asked.
I shook my head. "No. Don't come! I'll meet you guys back at camp."
"Okay. Well please get here soon, okay? Coach Flak and Hoffman are planning a search party at sunset if you don't get back soon and we can only stall them for so long." Nessie quipped.
"I'll do my best. I promise."
"You're safe though, right?" Alex added.
Was I safe?
I don't know.
But I hope I was with Lloyd.
"Yep! Someone's with me." I finally admitted.
"Oh –You're with someone?" Nessie asked.
"Is it a guy?" Alex asked with a suggestive tone.
I felt my cheeks burn up in a blush.
"Um…I think the line's breaking up, guys! Sorry!" I dismissed quickly.
"Oh, come on! Felicity!" Alex and Nessie moaned.
"Bye!" I giggled before hanging up the call.
"I'll drive you back to your campsite." He told me.
I looked at him. "I'd appreciate that. Thanks, Lloyd." I final\y uttered his name out for the first time.
I let his name linger on my lips.
Lloyd.
I liked it.
I liked it a lot.
… …
Renesmee Cullen
Alex, Gina and I had been searching for Felicity out here in the wild woods for over an hour and a half, trying to locate her whereabouts and looking for any clues.
I could smell her scent in the air though but it wasn't as acute as it should be which told me she was still further away but I guess we were getting closer.
If I smelled her blood trail, I would know exactly where she was. I knew Felicity's blood scent more than I knew any of my other friend's and there was a reason for that.
I recently found out from my dad that Felicity was my singer.
My father revealed to me that the reason why my urges picked up whenever I was around Felicity was because her blood sang to me; she was that one human whose blood particularly appealed to me but because I was half-human, it wasn't as aggressive as a full vampire would be.
La Tua Cantante was the term for it.
I spoke to my dad about it when I went on a vampire blood hunger strike –which was really just predominantly favoring human food instead of blood.
It wasn't a premeditated hunger strike but rather, a circumstantial strike. I had developed the habit of favoring human food a lot over the years as I got older simply because I spent most of my time with people who happened to enjoy only human food.
Jacob. The pack. My friends. A large portion of everyone I knew in my life survived solely on human food and so, naturally I adapted my meal plan accordingly.
It didn't bother me though.
I genuinely enjoyed human food now and I could live without blood for the rest of my life if I wanted to but like someone who was on a diet of no carbs but ends up craving it more and more on most days and wanting to succumb to those cravings, that feeling similarly mirrored my current relationship with blood.
Blood became more like a craving that I had to succumb to at least once a month.
I drank blood when I wanted to.
Some random days I joined my family on their weekend hunting expeditions and other days it was just Jake and I.
Jake…
Oh…
I was still reeling about what I found out about him and my mother.
Again, I don't think I would ever get over it.
They were in love with each other?
Goodness gracious!
That's creepy right? I'm not crazy right? Because that is so creepy!
What would they have done if I wasn't in the picture?
Would they have some weird lovers quarrel?
Would my dad and my fiancé fight to the death to gain my mother's heart like some medieval duel?
Or would they not battle to the death for her love at all?
Would they have a polyamorous relationship where my dad had my mom in the week and Jake had her on the weekends? Like some sort of custody agreement over who got to make-out with my mother on certain days?
Would my mom have chosen Jacob in the end instead of my dad if I wasn't born?
I'd like to think not but…
I wasn't so sure at this point.
I trembled at the thought.
I needed to focus on something else.
Like finding Felicity!
As we walked through the misty, windy, eerie woods; I suddenly realized Gina had been talking all this time. I must have zoned out which probably tuned out everything she has said until now.
"…So I have tried talking to Justin but I always chicken out or become awkward or both! I don't know what to do! I don't want to embarrass myself further, y'know? And I know you guys said he liked me too but, what if he doesn't? I don't think I could handle that rejection! But – I guess I have to face my fears eventually I—I just don't know. Does he really like me? No! I shouldn't even think of it –" She rambled speedily as she walked briskly, animating her hands with waving motions as she spoke.
I looked over to Alex who was uncharacteristically quiet. She didn't even seem to pay attention to anything Gina was saying either. She seemed to be in her own little world and mindset, although her facial expression still looked focused as she charted along by my side.
But there was something off with her.
She looked…
Sick?
Her face was unusually pale, her typically clear skin had developed a sudden reaction akin to acne or a rash and the bags under her fatigued eyes made me wonder if she had any sleep at all. She looked terrible.
"…I know you're probably wondering 'Gina! You don't sound like you've had boyfriends' and yes you'd be right! I haven't had a boyfriend but I've had a string of unrequited crushes on very hot guys who were way out of my league that always left me devastated in the end so you know what? Maybe I should just not care! Hehe! Yeah! It's not like Justin is the only guy in the world I think about when I sleep at night and when I wake up in the morning, right? Right?" Gina chuckled nervously as she looked between the two of us – hoping we could offer her words of encouragement or wisdom.
"Hmm?" I hummed in response.
She raised an eyebrow.
"Oh – Look, sorry Gina! I'm just a little preoccupied right now in finding my best friend?" I stated.
She gasped as she suddenly read the room.
Gina subsequently cursed herself, scolding herself for being thoughtless.
"God! Of course! I am being so inconsiderate and crass – I'm sorry! This is what I do! I tend to go off on a tangent when I have major anxiety and I end up getting really socially awkward and I don't pick up on major social cues! I'm sorry!" She apologized profusely.
I could tell she was definitely socially awkward and she reeked of anxiety which was in of itself distracting because it made me even more on edge.
I just gave her a soft smile before looking ahead, scanning the vicinity.
"Why would Felicity be this far out of range from the camping ground?" I asked, mostly to myself.
"I thought you told Coaches Flak and Hoffman that you knew where she was?" Gina probed, looking at me with confused eyes.
I glanced at her then back at Alex who was still dead silent.
"Um…Yeah, about that." I began. "Look – We don't exactly know where she is but we think we can have better luck finding her on our own than stressing everybody else out."
Gina looked at me in horror but nodded her head understandingly. "I mean sure but like maybe we could find her with more eyes and ears – Ever heard of safety in numbers?"
"And there's also death in numbers, Gina. It's called a massacre." Alex suddenly contributed to the conversation weakly. "None of us know who or what lurks around these woods."
I glared at her.
She rolled her eyes at me but didn't look at me as she continued to stay on high alert, despite being in her own world.
Gina looked at me with stunned, worried eyes before she exhaled an unfunny, shaky, anxious chuckle.
"Okay…" She whispered nervously. "Um – We should definitely call an adult!"
"What will an adult do? They can barely take care of themselves," Alex scoffed offhandedly.
Ah! She was especially rude today!
I suppose I wasn't in a great mood either so I definitely felt bad for Gina in this moment.
"I was just thinking—" Gina defended.
"Maybe don't do that then?!" Alex shouted, halting in her tracks as she darted her head at Gina. "If you're gonna spend the next however many hours getting all anxious and scared like a little kitten then maybe you should just do us a favor and leave? We were perfectly fine without your help, Gina!"
I narrowed my eyes at her, my jaw dropping at how abruptly abrasive and intransigently harsh she was to her. Alex was unfiltered and maybe a little assertive with a hint of sass but she was never flat out rude to anyone unless it was warranted.
I don't think Gina deserved such an outburst.
I flicked my attention onto Gina –whose face dropped in unalloyed shame, sadness and mortification – as she fell silent.
Alex grasped the magnitude her fired up outburst had on the already growing tension and sighed heavily.
"Sorry I—" She muttered before looking a little lightheaded. "I think I just need a minute to myself." She grumbled before walking away.
Gina and I stood as we watched her stroll through the redwood and oak tree swamped forest.
"I am so sorry about Alex! She didn't mean all of that. She's just – I think she's just going through a lot and she's stressed about Felicity –"
Gina shook me off. "No – It's okay. I get it. I can be a bit much, I tend to do that a lot. I didn't mean to upset her." She expressed.
I smiled politely. "No, you didn't. She's been acting weird lately. Knowing her, it probably has nothing do with you."
She nodded back, not fully convinced but at least she knew I was trying to comfort her.
"I'm going to check up on her. Do you mind just waiting here?" I asked her, resting my hand under her elbow.
She bobbed her head in response. "Sure!"
I emitted a small smile before ambling away and following Alex's trail.
I stumbled upon her torpidly sauntering in a weak motion, almost like her body forced her to shut down and slow down.
"Alex!" I called for her.
She didn't answer or stop.
"Alex!" I bellowed with more urgency and imperiousness.
She suddenly halted in her tracks.
"What?" She snapped back as she spun around to glare at me.
Somewhat taken aback by how aggressive she was, I huffed. It reminded me so much of the night she found out I was a vampire and threatened to kill me for it back on the night of junior prom.
Not so fond memories in our friendship history.
A moment in time I don't want to ever look back introspectively.
"Okay! Rude!" I huffed, pointing my finger at her. "What the hell is wrong with you?"
She rolled her eyes and spun on her heel. "Go away!" She demanded.
"No – No I will not! Tell me what's wrong with you. You're acting differently than you normally do." I told her.
She turned to me with a scoff. "Speak for yourself,"
I snorted. "Excuse me?" I asked, folding my arms together.
"You've been acting like a bitch all morning!" She pointed out.
I gasped. "You've also been acting bi—rudish all week!" I said, stopping myself from cussing.
I hated using foul language in my vocabulary.
She laughed. "Rudish?"
I rolled my eyes. "Talk to me, Alex."
"I am!" She laughed. "I'm talking right now."
"You know that's not what I mean. You haven't been acting like yourself and you know it."
"And so have you! I get that you're mad that your mother and fiancé had a history. It sucks. I know! It's weird but you should get over it!" She shouted.
"Get over it? Alex – You do realize they lied to me? My mother and fiancé lied to me about the extent of their relationship? How can I trust they haven't kept more secrets from me?!"
"God – Your parents and Jake had a life before you were born. Boohoo! Does it matter? You don't have to take it out on your friends who worry about you!" Alex stated.
She would usually be cheering me on and supporting me in my feelings about this situation.
This just enforced my theory that something was really troubling her that was worse than whatever drama I had with my family.
"Fine. You're right." I conceded. "I have been brassy and brash with you guys today and I'm sorry." I expressed.
She sighed.
"But I'm not gonna ignore that something else is bothering you." I said, moving closer to her and taking her hands in mine.
She pursed her lips together as she deliberated whether or not to tell me but I could see her face begin to change color, almost turning into a greenish color. She looked absolutely nauseous.
"Lex, I'm your friend. You can trust me! Just tell me what's going on?" I pleaded with her.
As if on cue, Alex abruptly flew a hand over her mouth before spinning around and charging for the nearest tree and hurled out her guts right onto the roots; her body throwing up all that was in her until the very last drop escaped her mouth. The noise of her barf was not pleasant to the ear.
She continued to regurgitate for at least a total of thirty seconds before she felt like she got everything out.
My eyes were widened in pure shock.
What was that?
"Does that answer your question?" She replied hoarsely as she wiped her mouth.
Speechless. Speechless. Speechless.
"That's the reason I've been acting weird lately." Alex added.
I didn't know what to say.
I didn't know where to start.
And yet…
When I did muster up words I asked the stupidest and most obvious question.
"Are you pregnant?" I questioned.
She shot her head up to look at me as she regained some strength and she exhaled a breath.
Alex simply nodded her head slightly. "Seven weeks." She simply said.
I felt my stomach drop suddenly and yet I wasn't even the one who was pregnant; but I felt like I just found out I was.
Sympathy pain, I guess.
I was still stunned.
I was still shocked.
"Alex, I—"
"You can save your lecture on teenage pregnancy or whatever. I know how this looks. Believe me! I'm just as pissed off as you are –maybe worse." She told me as she fell down against the tree – on the opposite side of her waste of course.
I gasped as I began walking up to her and took a seat beside the girl who had her face hidden between her legs as she sat them upright; hanging her head in shame and despair.
"Alex, I'm not mad at you. I'm concerned." I expressed truthfully. "Are you okay?"
I heard her sniffle as she lifted her head up to look at me.
"I'm not okay, Ness." She began to weep. "I—this is not what I wanted at all," She cried as she collapsed into my arms.
I immediately engulfed her in my arms, holding her head in between my hands and stroking it soothingly as I whispered comforting shushes and words of encouragement.
"Shh! Shh! I know. I know." I murmured to her. "It's gonna be okay."
She shook her head viciously. "No, it's not!" She yelped. "This wasn't supposed to happen! I'm so stupid!" She wept.
"No!" I stopped her. "You're not stupid."
"Ness, I'm a pregnant eighteen year old girl in high school? I am stupid!" She chuckled through the tears as she looked at me.
I smiled back softly as I wiped some of her tears. "Look – It's not ideal but you'll get through this."
She blinked as she frowned at me.
"When did you find out?" I asked.
She sniffed. "Two days ago," She revealed.
I nodded. "Does Seth know?" I asked.
Her eyes bulged as she viciously shook her head at me, gripping my clothes.
"No! No! He doesn't." She said.
"Okay…But you will tell him right?" I probed.
She didn't answer me immediately, she instead shifted the topic slightly.
"Seven weeks, Ness." She cried. "I thought I was careful but I guess I might've missed something, I don't know. I was late on my period and I got sick, but I thought it was flu. I took a couple of pregnancy tests just to be sure and then…" She trailed off.
I nodded. "Who else knows?"
"You're the only one that knows." She said to me. "I think my aunt suspects but I don't know…"
I didn't wanna overstep any boundaries in this specific moment so I didn't want to impose unsolicited advice on her to tell Seth about this yet unless she was 100% ready.
"I know you're probably judging me right now," She stated.
"Nobody's judging you, Alex!" I muttered to her. "I know I'm not!" I told her.
She scoffed, unconvinced.
"Yeah, well…Just my luck, I guess." She sighed as she pulled away from me and leaned her back and head against the tree.
I exhaled a breath as I leaned back against the tree as well beside her as we both sat in pure silence for at least a decent amount of minutes; staring into the horizon.
"What are you gonna do?" I asked after a long pause.
She shrugged. "I—I can't keep the baby." She said, with clear diction and conviction.
I didn't respond just yet, letting her words sink in.
"You know how I feel about this, Ness." She added, emphasizing and supporting her reason.
I sighed. "I know," I exhaled.
She seemed to have already made the decision in her head and it was her prerogative to do so. I wasn't going to criticize or judge her for it.
She didn't even need to elaborate any further on what she meant about that. Deep down I knew what she meant by that. There were options yes; be it adoption or abortion but I knew Alex well enough to know where her head was at.
And when she sets her mind to something, she does it.
"There's no doubt in my mind that you will make the best choice for you, but if you ever need advice or a listening ear. I am here for you, Alex. If you need anything at all, I'm there." I assured her, locking my hand with hers.
She smiled back as she laid her head against my shoulder.
"Thanks," She whispered back.
As much as I wanted to respect her decision, I just felt really icky that I was privy to such a personal, huge, important secret like this and Seth had no clue about it.
"I actually do need your help with something." She brought up.
I hummed in response.
"I need someone to accompany me to the medical center to you know…" She trailed off, hoping I'd catch where she was going.
I did.
"I don't know, Alex." I said. "Of course, I wanna help and support you but, I don't know if I can do this knowing Seth doesn't know anything about it."
"Please?" She begged. "I just can't bear the thought of seeing his face if he finds out I was pregnant and that I wasn't going to keep the baby in the process. He cannot find out about this, okay? Promise me, he won't?!"
Oddly enough, I found her reasoning sufficient enough because I became instantly agreeable –but I couldn't help but ponder on the nagging feeling that was eating at me knowing that I was keeping such a big secret from someone I love.
Secrets tend to find a way of revealing themselves and when they do, they hurt more than the intended effect which was to protect them from hurt.
Jennifer Lee Carrell's words in Interred With Their Bones rings true in this case: 'A secret is a kind of promise…it can also be a prison.'
My parents and Jake felt the need to keep this secret from me for all my life. It must have been a big secret for them to do that in the first place.
And I don't know if I trusted that they would tell me the full story even if I confronted them about it.
Was it wise to just keep the fact that I knew about the secret… a secret?
Or would that do more harm to me than good?
And how would that translate to the secret I now carry with Alex?
I put a pin in my thought process and turned my attention back to Alex.
"I'll do it." I told her.
Her face lit up.
"Really?" She asked.
I smiled, nodding my head.
"I'm always going to be there for you, Alex." I told her.
She smiled as she pulled me into a passionate hug to which I reciprocated just as warmly.
Hours had passed since we searched for Felicity, and we found relief when she finally got ahold of us.
First by text, which we couldn't be confident with because an abductor could have easily framed such a message but we did have hope she was safe.
Secondly, our hope became renewed when we heard her voice when she called us to inform us she was safe and sound.
Thirdly, when she returned to the camp with a mysterious, elusive man who didn't seem like the friendliest person to be around but I could tell Felicity seemed oddly fond of in some weird, sadistic, masochistic way.
"His name's Lloyd." Felicity told us later that night in our tent, her face beaming at the thought of him. "He found me in the woods. Apparently I toppled over a log and scrapped my knee and thigh which kind of knocked me out. This is why I don't camp!" She laughed.
I don't know but something about the story was fishy. She seemed to be withholding a lot of crucial information and details from the tale although she didn't look like she was completely lying either.
"Are you sure he's not a serial killer?" Rea asked.
Felicity scoffed. "Nope!"
I widened my eyes.
"I'm not even gonna see him again anyway." She assured us. "And even if I did, I'm done with bad boys!"
Good! She needed a good guy for once or better yet, stay single!
Relationships were a lot of drama.
… …
Bella Cullen
The Cullen family loves to hunt and ever since our family expanded over the years, we loved to hunt as a family.
This weekend was one of those occasions.
We had just come back from our hunting escapade over in Vancouver, Canada. There were large varieties of moose, elk and deer, bison, black and grizzly bears and my personal favorite, Bighorn sheep up there. I enjoyed Canada.
Canada being a top contender for our next move was definitely intriguing simply because of the hunting side of things, although my heart was slightly set on Iceland because it would provide a change of pace for us. A fresh new start in a foreign land. It'll give me a chance to learn a new language too and embrace a new culture.
But then again….
Iceland was far away from North America.
At least if we moved to Canada or even Vermont, I could still see Charlie somewhat regularly. He didn't want to miss out on any moments in my life after Nessie was born because he knew he didn't have much time with either of us. His time on earth had a timeframe whereas we had a limitless immortal lifetime because we never changed.
And I had great sympathy for that.
He had to watch his only granddaughter grow up in a literal blink of an eye and he was advancing in years, he probably feels he won't be around to actually see how far his generation and lineage would grow from Nessie onwards.
God…
I didn't know if I wanted to be a grandmother.
Firstly, I didn't look like a grandmother nor will I ever look like one. I was going to be stuck in a 19 year old body for all eternity but I was still twenty-seven years old. Not even thirty.
So young to be a mom of a teenager.
Let alone of a potential grandchild.
This whole engagement with Jake and Nessie has me philosophically thinking about what will come next and the future terrifies me, I'm not gonna lie.
I didn't know where their head was at when it came to kids. I just knew they wanted them but I didn't know when they would start creating a family.
Hopefully Jake and Nessie will spare me the blushes of being a young grandmother.
Give me a decade or two at least, please!
My mother wasn't even done having kids and she was already a grandmother – she'd have a gag if she knew about this.
Renee recently revealed to me almost two years ago that I had a younger sister named Janice who they called Nissy –which is funnily enough very similar to Nessie's moniker.
I think I was comfortable calling her Jannie for short.
Let's call it a sisterly inside nickname. She called me Izzy and I called her Jannie. Great.
Anyway, a couple months after I met Janice for the first time, my mother revealed to me she was pregnant for a third time.
Renee and Phil welcomed their second child together, Walter 'Wally' Theodore Philip Dwyer. Apparently he was named after Phil's favorite baseball player of all time, Walter Johnson.
I should have expected as much what with him being a baseball aficionado and whatnot.
Wally and Jannie were cute but it felt really weird to have siblings over 20 years my junior. Janice was almost seven years old and Wally was just over a year old.
I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Phil did want to have kids. My mother needed a lot of convincing initially but she did give in to it because she wanted a second chance at being a mother when she was a lot older and wiser, I don't know.
My mother was still of childbearing age when she first had Janice come to think of it although one would quantify it as geriatric.
But Wally was an IVF baby which was a hellish process for my mother that took a toll on her physically and financially. The last few rounds of IVF treatment I sponsored some of my money to assist so I guess I had a hand in my little brother's birth.
My little brother…
I never thought I'd ever see the day where that would ever happen.
Seldom, not always, but I do wish I had the opportunity to give Nessie siblings though. I don't know…Being the only child in a house filled with adults could tend to be a lonely experience –I was testament to that– but I don't think Nessie ever complained about it which was good to know.
I didn't think I would ever want to be a mother until I actually became one and now that's all I ever thought about lately.
Renee was raising human children who aged at a normal rate.
I raised a hybrid vampire who aged rapidly.
I couldn't help but think, Nessie would be playing with her young aunt and uncle right now.
Instead, now she's about to get married.
Do you see my dilemma?
"You're not thinking about Nessie again, are you love?" Edward asked me.
He didn't have to read my mind –nor could he with my shield up – to know what I was thinking.
I sighed heavily. "Sorry – I didn't think I would find it so hard to accept it," I said,
My eyes were trained on Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie running around our spacious, green grass backyard as they played some quick touch football with Carter, entertaining the tiny, energetic boy.
I smiled as I watched Carter climb onto his dad, Emmett's large back as he attempted to tackle him to the ground.
"It's not easy. I know but we have to accept it." He said, tossing his arm over my shoulders as we stood and looked on.
"I know – I'm of course happy for her. Happy for them both! I just wish I could turn back the clock, y'know?"
"Do things differently?" He asked.
I shrugged. "Not differently, per se. Maybe…Better? Maybe in a perfect world we could have had at least two or three kids running around right now?" I scoffed.
He snorted. "Are you feeling broody, Mrs. Cullen?"
I stuck my tongue out at him and rolled my eyes, but if I was human I would probably blush.
"We can still fulfill our parental desires in other avenues? We could always foster? Or pull a Carlisle and Esme and just adopt?" He teased.
I looked up at him. "Adopt a bunch of teenage vampires?"
He laughed. "Not exactly. I don't know – Maybe not."
I frowned. What was he getting at?
"Human kids?" I demanded, cocking an eyebrow.
He shrugged, smiling crookedly. "Why not?"
I giggled. He can't be serious!
"And what about the giant elephant in the room?!" I pointed out. "How would we explain to our human children that their adoptive parents don't age like their friends' parents at school do? Or how we don't sleep? Or how we don't eat? Or how we occasionally thirst for their blood and have to quench our thirst with animal blood instead?"
He chuckled. "It's stupid, I agree."
I sighed, dropping my shoulders as I stared back at the scene of Carter cracking up at the top of his lungs as his parents, Rosalie and Emmett tackled and tickled him to the ground as he gripped onto the football.
"Maybe we can open up a hybrid rehabilitation center," I joked up a hypothetical.
He scoffed. "Wouldn't that be something," He laughed.
It was interesting that Edward was also thinking about having more kids. We rarely talked about it but I guess we were both on the same wavelength in wanting that parental need to care for another child.
Carter came into our family when we least expected it.
Who knows what the future held?
Subsequently, we smelt the lovely, sweet scent that belonged to none other than our daughter.
We thenceforth heard a car pull up into the driveway on the other side of the house. Nessie had just returned from her long weekend camping trip out in the outskirts of California. I was eager to hear all the details of her trip.
"Ah! Looks like our daughter's back!" I squealed, looking up at Edward who suddenly had a blank facial expression.
I furrowed my eyebrows at him, curious about the sudden mood change but I didn't ponder on it too much before I began walking into the house to meet her just before she entered the house.
I jogged inhumanly out of the front entrance doorway and waved at Alex's Chevy hatchback, watching as my daughter slipped out of the car.
Nessie locked eyes with me. I expected her usual bright smile but all I got was a scowl from her; an unreadable scowl that looked like a mixture of a lot of emotions.
Oh…
What was wrong?
Did something happen to her?
Did I do something wrong?
She shut the car door and sauntered over to the trunk to retrieve her things. She whispered something to Alex that I could vaguely hear from the distance. It seemed like she made sure I didn't hear it.
"Uh – Hey, girls! Come on in! I prepared some chicken quesadillas for you. You must be famished!" I said with a smile.
Alex turned to me with a polite smile. "Um…I'm actually gonna head home, Mrs. C. I'm a little tired but thank you for the offer."
I nodded back but frowned at how weird that exchange was.
Seriously, what was going on with those two?
"I'll text you later?" Nessie confirmed with Alex.
Alex nodded before the two best friends shared a long, parting hug before Nessie grabbed her things and Alex hopped back into her car lethargically before driving off.
Nessie turned to look at me again but this time, not to lock eyes with me but to look over my shoulder where she met eyes with Edward –who was now standing behind me with the same distinctive, blank expression on his face.
Nessie walked up the driveway and up the porch steps with her heavy luggage.
"Let me help you," I offered.
She hissed at me. "I got it!" She stated sternly and abrasively before breezing passed the both of us into the house.
I flinched at the tone.
She had never talked to me like that before. We always had a very upbeat, tensionless relationship unlike the more tumultuous and often contemptuous relationship she had with her dad.
Nessie sighed as she dropped her things onto the ground before spinning around to glare at me in particular.
"Mom, we need to talk…" Nessie said in a newfound curtness I had never seen directed towards me before.
Oh…
To Be Continued…
A/N: Here's an update! I hope you like it! Oooh! So much drama is brewing already.
Alex is pregnant! Let's see what happens next with that story.
And if you want to know what happens next…
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