WARNING: Dark themes within this chapter. They will be recurring themes throughout this fanfiction.
Chapter Three: Bloodlust.
I could only feel one thing after my cries had died during the bleakness of the night. Something that consumed my whole being, I couldn't focus on anything else.
Bloodlust.
It now a insatiable craving that overshadowed every other feeling and basic instinct. It was a primal urge, a unholy instinct so potent that it threatens to consume every last trace of my humanity. Yet within the dark depths of this seeming eternal primal hunger, there is a battle that rages—a new struggle to hold on to the fleeting shreds of my remaining humanity. Yet was there any point in saving it? After all being a human only brought me pain. Wether it was feeling inferior to him or the near constant battle to not be physically sick or hurt with each day that passed.
Now as a vampire, I am compelled by a new hunger… a thirst that surpasses any other desire. It isn't a choice but a necessity, an unrelenting need that drives me to seek out the life of what ever human I came across. With every beat of their hearts, with every drop of their blood, I am briefly reminded of what I once was, of the life I was violently taken. Yet I couldn't bring myself to focus on that, I was a passenger in my own body but I revealed in the satisfying feeling I got when violently draining a human.
Over the last forty-eight hours I quickly learned that blood is not merely sustenance; it is a connection to the world of the living. When I fed, I feel their vitality, their warmth, and their fleeting mortality. In those moments, I am intimately linked to my 'new pulse' my new meaning of life itself. It's both a curse and a gift. It was the unspoken true natural law of the world.
Within the chaos of bloodlust, my internal humanity still tried to fight these new instincts yet they were no louder than a whisper in the shadows. I could just remember what it was like living with Charlie… my mom… god the thought of what they're feeling now. I struggled to feel compassion or remorse, just something other than bloodlust but I couldn't bring myself to feel or even try and comprehend anything else. I didn't want to, yet I did mourn the feeling of being tired, the feeling of curling up in a blanket, and the simple pleasure of laughter among friends. These memories, while fading, are the last remnants of my humanity. Then there was anger… no it was a form or rage mixed with hatred at what they had done. They'd hidden so much from me.
Hearing laughter in the distance I instinctively ran towards it, reaching a small cabin in the woods. Hiding within the tall tree branches I could see a couple sat outside seeming to be enjoying the crisp morning. Without a second thought I grabbed the young woman closest to me and retreated back to my spot in the trees all within half a second. She was dead before she knew what had happened, holding her lifeless body I watched her partner sudden panic. His heartbeat began to quicken, smiling I dropped the body, his heart pounded in his chest like a drum. Hypnotised by the drum of his heart I lunged again savouring the sweeter taste of his terror enjoying every last drop. Licking my lips I looked at his lifeless body in discussed, not at the fact his throat had been savagely butchered to the point it gave any gory horror movie a run for its money. But the nagging feeling that with every time I give in to the bloodlust, I feel a piece of my humanity slipping away…
The guilt and remorse that follow, the awareness of the lives I've taken, weigh heavily on my fleeting conscience. It's a torment that never seems to end, a reminder of the monster that lurks within. Had this been what Victoria meant? Had this been what she wanted? I could barely keep my thoughts straight. There were fleeting moments when I yearn for the release of eternal sleep, to escape this new eternal cycle of blood, darkness and death.
I had to give some credit to them… the way they resisted human blood was unnatural to say the least. The thought of animal blood repulsed me. But then, a whisper emerges—a belief that somehow, I can find a way to quell the bloodlust, to hold onto my humanity, and to seek redemption.
Could I become a creature that could live in peace between these two worlds—the world of the living and the world of the undead. Bloodlust may define my existence, but my internal humanity is the last ember of my former self, the tiny spark that refuses to be extinguished; as a human I longed to be part of this world and now I've finally been given it… I should be aloud to embrace it, wether I be a vegetarian or not. As long as that spark remains, I will continue to fight the darkness that threatens to consume me, seeking a way to reconcile the monster I've become with the humanity I've left behind.
I'd greedily killed ninety-seven humans in the short week I'd been a vampire. Instinctively I wanted to keep killing and bathing in as much human blood as I could consume. I ran as fast as I could, through the forest of Northern America. I'd no idea if I was in Canada or America, I didn't really care, I traveled further into the wilderness to escape every inch of humanity that I could. If I wasn't near humans I couldn't hunt them. It was the single thought I had managed to act on. The beast inside me snarled in protest at the fact I wasn't indulging in its cravings, but instinctively I knew for my safety I had to and the beast submitted for the first time.
Supernatural beings are not so reckless. In all my seventeen years, as a human, I'd never known or suspected that the supernatural world exists. Now that I was a vampire I had to protect the secret, Rosalie had made that law clear. No humans could know about our existence but then what were the other laws of this world? One thing I did know was that I had been reckless in keeping the secret, I hadn't exposed myself in anyway to humans well any that were still alive. But I hadn't spaced out my kills as I'm guessing I should have. It's likely that the humans will think a new serial killer was on the loose and with that it would be best to leave the area before any further attention is brought…
Edward had briefly mentioned the existence of the supposed vampire royalty, the two queens and king. Out of all my human memories him explaining the history of the royals and Carlisle's short stay with them remained most intact. They did not offer second chances, especially when it came to upholding the vampire laws.
Vampire… it was still so strange to me that I was now one. Part of a new yet older than recorded history, a world I had longed to be part of. I came to a stop by a lake, it didn't seem to be any lake of significance, one that seemed forgotten about amiss the dense woodland. Hesitantly I crept closer to the shore line not wanting to disturb its still water, slowly a figure came to stare back at me in the watery reflection. Staring in disbelief at what the transformation had done, I froze in shock. Where my once ordinary boring brown eyes had been were replaced with bright red orbs that pulsated with a new sinister glow. It was as if my very soul had been set ablaze.
"You'd be smart to keep on moving Blood demon," A female voice warned to my left. A warning growl started in my throat, looking for who the voice belonged to only to be met with laughter. My eyes darted across the tree line and tree tops but still couldn't see who or what was talking to me.
"Where is your sire?" another demanded, this one coming from behind me. I spun around crouching slightly a warning growl began in my throat but turned in to one of frustration. Still I couldn't see what was speaking to me, my new heightened senses unable to detect anything either.
"I don't know where she is," I replied, still searching the trees. The air had grown somewhat tense , what ever these creatures where they didn't like vampires but then what the hell were they?
"Typical," the first voice snorted.
"Hey! I never asked to be this." I snapped back, slightly annoyed. Where most creatures asses?
"There is a coven of your kind west of here," The second voice said softly after a few minuets, out the corner of my eye I saw something glimmer gently by a tree. Turning my head I could see what seemed to be a woman no bigger that a barbie doll flying cautiously by the tree line, she wore what seemed to be a moss fashioned dress. Instinctively I knew she was a fairy, "You'll come across one of them after a few hours of running in that direction."
"Now get off our lands," the first voice snapped, an older looking fairy appeared next to the first pointing her small hand to the West.
I nodded my head and mumbled a quick 'thanks' before taking off west not wanting to stay on their land anymore. I'd no idea they even existed which then raises the question again are all the fairytale creatures and myths real? Maybe this other coven would be willing to educate me on this new world I mused in my mind, or at least hoped they would.
I could remember the Cullens had cousins in Alaska but they never mentioned any other covens in Northern America. Given my recent travels it wasn't hard to piece together that it was likely the cousins of the Cullens I was heading towards. Hopefully they'd be able to help me cling on to what ever scraps of my humanity remained or even teach me the basics and I'd go out and find my true place in this world.
After about thirty minuets of running I came across two scents one was honeysuckle and the other a sweet lavender. I knew they were from vampires, I hesitantly picked up my pace as I followed them. I had no idea how to great them, based on the meeting the Cullens had had with James' coven I assume it would be okay to randomly show up. I mean its not like I had their phone number to send a quick text or call to give them the heads up.
Twenty five minuets later I could see through the trees the outline of a house, it was larger than the Cullens seeing blend in more with the surroundings. Slowing my pace to a walk I could pick up three other scents as I got closer to the house, I heard the light footsteps of five individuals exit the house. I watched as three blondes lined up next to a brunette female and male, all with yellow eyes…
A/N: Hello I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Just wanted to say thank you for the support so far!Also I just wanted to add a small note in to say that the Volturi is kinda modelled after the Life & Death version as I never liked Aro and I want to have a less corrupt vampire royalty if you get me.
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See you all in the next chapter!
