Disclaimers: Naruto is someone else's, this is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.
Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, angst, and (of course) beautiful yaoi love.
A Death to Escape
Chapter 23: Being- Afraid
"Even death has a heart."
-Markus Zusak
--
Naruto stared with wide blue eyes as the orderlies sedated Itachi. He couldn't get his body to move until the Uchiha was completely listless, until he was no longer a threat. To him or to-
"Gaara!!"
He jerked his head around, searching in a blind panic for his friend. The redhead was struggling to push himself up against the wall, his hand pressed firmly to his stomach. Blood flowed steadily, covering his hand and sliding down his stomach, pooling in his lap.
"No.." Naruto breathed, "no no no no-"
He scrambled over, tears slipping freely down his scarred cheeks.
"Gaara.. oh my god.."
Naruto's voice cracked beneath the weight of his fear. He reached out, fingers trembling as he covered Gaara's hand, adding more pressure to the wound.
"D-don't..nnnn- don't.. worry.. Blondie.." Gaara choked out. He winced and took in a sharp inhale, trying to manage through the pain.
Blood slipped free from his lips, and a thin trail slid down his chin. Naruto's heart clenched at the sight of it, and he gently brushed it away, trying not to think about what it meant.
"Gaara, Gaara- it'll be ok", he scooted closer, and ran his fingers through deep crimson hair, trying to keep his voice steady and soothing, "You'll be ok. Just- just breathe. Stay with me, ok? Please.. just-"
Medics surrounded them, and Naruto was suddenly lifted away from his bleeding friend. "No! NO! Let me go! Gaara needs me! Please!!"
"Naruto, hey- he's gonna be alright. But we gotta give them space to treat him."
Naruto glanced back. "Jiraiya?"
The man glanced down at the small blonde. "Don't worry, he'll-" Jiraiya's eyes locked onto his shoulder. "You're injured- Hey! I need a medic over here too!" he called.
"No! I'm fine! Please- just help Gaara."
One of the nurse decided to ignore his protests, and instead led him over to a chair several paces away. She helped him remove his shirt, and at the sight of his left shoulder quickly began pulling out supplies.
The gash turned out to be deeper than he realized, adrenaline having dulled the pain. When the nurse patted away blood, he could see that the cut was jagged and angry- like the weapon was just as much a monster as the wielder.
Jiraiya's eyes hardened. "Itachi shouldn't have been out here in the first place. How the hell he managed to slip past all those people.."
"They're working for him."
Jiraiya raised his eyebrow in disbelief, and the blonde hurried to explain.
"He said he has allies here. That they purposely distracted you so he could get to me. The only reason he targeted Gaara was because he was trying to protect me.."
Naruto looked down, blinking back tears of shame. He couldn't believe that he got Gaara involved in this.
He shouldn't even be here, he thought. Why did he have to come? Why did he have to stand in front of me like that?
Why was I such a fucking coward?!
.. It should have been me.
"You really think he has people working for him from the inside?" Jiraiya asked, pulling him from his guilt-ridden thoughts. "That people here would betray so many others for the benefit of one man."
Naruto looked away. "I know you don't want to believe it", he said quietly, ignoring the nurse's scrutinizing look, "but it's true. How else would he be able to reach people on the outside? How was he able to get keys to my room? Where did he get the knife from?"
The nurse finished treating his wound, and Jiraiya sent her off to help the team surrounding Gaara. He turned back to face the blonde.
"You know how crazy this sounds, don't you?"
Naruto kept his gaze averted, not wanting to see the look of doubt in the man's eyes. He needed Jiraiya to be on his side. He had no idea what he would do without the man's support. Without his protection.
"You don't believe me.. do you.."
Jiraiya gave him a sad look, then slid his gaze over to the redhead bleeding all over the floor.
"I want to, kid. I really do."
Seeing Naruto's stricken face, he added- "I'll help you in any way I can, alright?"
I guess I can't ask for much more than that..
Naruto looked back at Gaara. "Then let me go to him."
Jiraiya looked like he was going to protest, but Naruto cut him off before he could. "Please, Jiraiya. He's important to me."
The orderly sighed and scratched the back of his head while the blonde waited expectantly. After a moment of consideration, he nodded. "Go. Just stay out of their way, alright? They need to stabilize him before they try moving him to the med ward."
Naruto jumped up and scrambled over to his half-conscious friend, fear making his legs unsteady. He fell heavily to his knees and moved close to his side. "Gaara..?"
The redhead glanced over, his green eyes hazy and unfocused. "Na.. ruto.."
The blonde choked back a sob and grasped his hand. It was cold and limp, and the feel of it terrified him. "You have to be ok. You have to."
"T-tell.. Lee.. I.. I-"
His eyes rolled back in his head and he passed out. The doctors didn't look happy about it. In fact, they immediately started to panic. In the midst of the sudden chaos, a gurney was brought in and they quickly pulled him onto it.
"Is he going to be ok?!" Naruto cried. "Please- I have to know!"
But the team of medics ignored him, and rushed off without a word.
Naruto stared after them, terrified that that would be the last time he'd see his best friend alive.
--
Gaara was dead for three minutes and twenty-six seconds.
The medics had rushed him back to their med ward and quickly got to work hooking up IVs and filling his veins with drugs. The surgical team was brought in to examine the wound and realized immediately that he would require surgery. More drugs were administered, a blood transfusion initiated, but his vitals crashed once the procedure began.
The medics fought to resuscitate him, but after several failed attempts they made the call. They looked at each other with matching somber expressions.
This was always the worst part.
No one wanted to lose a patient. Watching a life slip from between your fingers as you fought to save it.. explaining to their loved ones why they would never see their cherished person again..
It never got easier.
The surgeons and assisting nurses swallowed down their grief, and the overwhelming surge of guilt that came with it, and got to work. They would have to straighten up the room and the deceased for the family's final viewing.
They carefully disconnected IVs and were just about to unplug him from their machines when Gaara's heart started beating again.
The staff was stunned, then quickly jumped into action to stabilize his vitals and continue the procedure.
"The kid clearly has something worth fighting for.." one of the nurses commented, awe-struck by the sudden miracle.
She had heard of cases like this, but had never seen it with her own eyes. Three minutes and twenty-six seconds was a pin drop in the grand scheme of things, but an incredibly long time for someone's heart to stop.
Being dead for three minutes and twenty-six seconds usually meant being dead forever.
And yet, Gaara had pulled through.
The serrated knife that had been used to tear through his flesh and shred his insides caused a significant amount of damage. Now that Gaara was back, he would require another blood transfusion and surgery to repair his severed artery.
He would need to stay in the hospital for at least a week to recover.
But he would recover.
When Naruto heard the news he had collapsed, the horror of losing Gaara and the relief of getting him back a complete shock to his system. Jiraiya stayed right by his side, and did what he could to comfort the distraught blonde, but it wasn't enough. He wouldn't be ok until he saw Gaara, alive and breathing, with his own eyes.
"There has to be a way" he pleaded for the millionth time.
"Naruto.."
Deep blue eyes burned as the blonde glared at him. "If Itachi can fucking stab my best friend, then at the very least I should be able to see him!"
Jiraiya paused, but he just couldn't say no to the scared little blonde. The kid had won him over, despite the walls he kept up around his patients.
Maybe I'm just getting too old for this..
He sighed. "I'll see what I can do."
After three days of sweet talking and a handful of favors, Jiraiya was able to get Naruto in for a visit.
"I'll wait for you in the hall" he said softly. "Take your time."
Naruto gave him a small sad smile. "Thanks Jiraiya."
The man nodded and watched as Naruto stepped into the hospital room, quietly closing the door behind him.
Naruto paused against the door, staring at the blindingly white hospital room, breathing in the overwhelming scent of disinfectant and stale air. He swallowed, not really understanding why he suddenly felt so nervous. There was just something about being here, in this room, with the sharp beeping jutting from their machines, and the eery quiet settling around it, that made his skin feel tight and set his teeth on edge.
Taking a deep breath, Naruto walked lightly across the room, careful to muffle his steps, but not really understanding why he felt the need to. He moved past the empty cot and over to the heavy white curtain dividing the room. His hand shook as he grasped the pale fabric, terrified of what he would find on the other side.
Beep
Beep
Beep..
The sound of a heart that fought off death, beating steadily. That's what drew him in, what gave him the nerve to enter this suffocating place and face the blame he'd undoubtedly find in Gaara's eyes. Even knowing how badly it would hurt to be hated by him, he would face this. Because it was Gaara- his best friend and constant protector, the rock that kept him steady and the sly wolf who kept him on edge.
Gaara gave Naruto his life back when he was at his lowest, and had recaptured his own when it had so quickly slipped from his fingers.
So, he would shove down his fear and face whatever was on the other side of the curtain.
For Gaara.
And his ever persistent heart.
Finally embracing his new-found resolve, Naruto pulled away the curtain..
.. and found two inky black eyes staring back at him.
Author Note:
Dat drama doeeee. ;)
Angst horse drops a gang sign and kicks out a window*
"Neigh, bitches."
--
... haha I don't know- it was another late night. My mind is spiraling. "Onward, Cinnamon!!"
