Thirteen
Rimmer felt the confidence of Ace's personna rapidly disappear as he watched Lister collapse onto the ground. His stomach clenched as Lister's head emitted a sickening crack as it made contact with the floor, blood rapidly pooling from his nose. Oh God, no, Lister…I should've gotten here sooner…
The universe was still as he stared despondently at the crumpled body of his best friend, his panic only decreasing to major concern upon noticing Lister's shallow breathing. We need to go, now. If you smegging die on me, I'll never let you hear the end of it-
"Hey, Goalpost Head! You gonna stare at Monkey Boy all day or are you gonna do somethin' useful?"
Rimmer whipped around to glare at the Cat, whose arrogant demeanour quickly vanished upon seeing the former's fiery expression. I would happilyleave you behind on this piece of garbage, but I can't carry Lister on my own. Not with one soft-light arm, anyway.
"Mister Rimmer, sir, I'm so glad to see you alive! A-and returning to normal! And alive!" Kryten's stammering, interrupted Rimmer's internal monologue.
Choosing to ignore the droid for a few moments, Rimmer bent down and yanked the Cat forward by the collar, untying his bonds with one hand while gripping his suit with the other.
"Ay, ay, ay, watch the creases!" Cat shrieked, choosing not to thank his rescuer as he stretched his sore wrists. "And what the hell is up with your outfit? Didn't think holograms could sport ugly-ass hair like that!"
"Don't you realise what's happened, Mister Cat, sir?" Kryten asked. "Mister Rimmer's hard light drive is beginning to reactivate-"
"No, no, I got that part! I asked what was up with his godawful hair!" Cat reluctantly accepted Rimmer's hand to help him to his feet, kicking away the ropes that had bound him. "Even Monkey Boy's hair looks sexier than that!"
"I-I mean, it looks like the wig Mister Ace used to wear, b-but I was sure that you'd gotten rid of all of your Ace artefacts, sir!" Kryten's voice broke with alarm as his head was roughly yanked off of the broom, a few small sparks emerging from the damaged wires hanging from the remains of his neck. "Sir, I must protest-"
Rimmer held the bog bot at eye level, giving him a stern look that clearly said "We'll discuss this later" before throwing him over to the Cat, eliciting cries of alarm from both as the feline struggled to catch the incoming head. "What the hell, man? I'm a cat, not a baseball-!"
The cell was suddenly rocked by a sudden explosion, with the shockwave knocking Rimmer and the Cat to their feet. Pieces of debris from the ruined doorframe flew through parts of Rimmer's body, while others painfully slammed into his newly-regenerated skin, eliciting a soundless groan to escape his throat. Smeg! We're running out of time. They know I'm here!
Ignoring the sensation of his burning flesh, Rimmer felt his body engage into autopilot. He jumped back to his feet and stumbled over to Lister's motionless form, grabbing the collar of Lister's hideous jacket as he dragged him towards the corner of the cell where the Cat and Kryten were taking refuge. He angrily thrust his arm out towards the corridor, his pointed finger visibly shaking as he strained to hold Lister's wait. Smeggin' run for it!
Cat wasted no time in scrambling to his feet and sprinting towards the doorframe, clutching Kryten's dirt-smeared head under his armpit, which muffled the concerned protests of the android. "Ay, you brought a bazookoid! Finally, you did something useful!"
Rimmer's eyes would have rolled out of their sockets at this point if it was physically possible. Thinking fast, he used his hard-light arm to thrust Lister over his shoulder, cringing as the dead weight of his friend exerted an unnatural amount of force down his arm. Bloody hell, Lister, you reallyneed to lose a few stone…
A second explosion threatened to knock the hologram off his feet, but Lister's weight was able to keep from flying backwards. He glanced up to find the Cat holding the bazookoid barrel up towards the ceiling and looking sheepish. A small amount of concrete debris fell from his hair. "I was just tryin' to fix my clothes!"
Rimmer gave a mute growl of annoyance, though his attention was quickly grabbed by the approaching metallic footsteps. His heart instantly leapt into his throat as he charged forward, gripping onto Lister's jacket for dear life as he led the way.