"Last time on Total Drama island!" Chris began the episode. "After eating an all bean breakfast, the teams had to cross the island in silence, which was much farter than it sounds. And every little butt yodel drew the attention of the raptors that were hunting them. Some skated through the challenge easily, others weren't so lucky. Like one raptor who got a jurassic smackdown. Yeah, turns out the real Julia is really mean. Oh, I should also mention that MK watched everyone's confessionals, and Scary Girl knocked out several raptors with her bare hands. In the end, Julia was sent packing after MK recorded her epic dino roast and showed it to everyone- and Julia decided to place the blame on Bowie. Now we've recived quite a few complaints from fans around the world about the nature of the challenge we settled on. And I'd just like to say that neither me nor Chef are "weirdos'' like you claim us to be, blame the producers who came up with the challenge and not us, you spoiled, uneducated little basement dwellers-"
"No no no, too much, too much!" Chef stopped him.
"Sorry, sometimes I get carried away. And… this is Total. Drama. Island!"
*roll intro*
Confessional: MK
"My plan to fly under the radar stays intact. Julia is gone and it's all thanks to me and my quick thinking. Now we just gotta keep winning challenges until the merge, and if we don't I have enough footage downloaded to paint targets on all of my teammates backs. Plan MK is taking action," she gave the camera a devilish grin.
"Woah, that's wild. I can't believe you kicked a raptor's teeth out!" The members of the Trout were all sitting together, and Zee was quite impressed with Scary Girl's animal fighting skills.
"I couldn't let it eat Damien. While seeing his blood would be cool, we can't just lose a team member," Scary Girl took a bite of her breakfast. Today's was certainly an upgrade from the previous day- no more beans, just somewhat decent breakfast burritos.
"I'll add that to the list of uncanny but extremely helpful things about people here," Millie chuckled as she chewed.
"Millie! That was a sick burn," Priya complimented.
"Yeah?" Millie perked up.
"Yeah! You're on fire!" Priya responded.
"You know what? You're on fire!" Millie playfully responded.
"We're both on fire!" Millie and Priya giggled. "You're funny!" Priya added.
Confessional: Millie
"The kids at school call me a lot of things. None of them were 'funny'..." Millie started, before pausing. "We don't need to go there.
Scary Girl, however, did not take as kindly to Millie's comment. "So when you say uncanny but helpful, are you saying that you wouldn't think someone like me would be good help for the team?" She turned her head a bit further towards Millie than what a normal person could.
"No, not at all! You've been great with the challenges! Mostly…" Millie whispered the last part to herself.
"You've been a big help, Scary Girl," Damien placed his hand on her shoulder. "I appreciate all that you do, really. While I did find you terrifying before, and maybe still do a little, I don't think I'd be able to survive this game without you."
Scary Girl turned a deep shade of red. "Thanks Damien," she gave a sweet smile.
Millie turned to Priya and whispered. "So him saying she's terrifying doesn't set her off yet me saying that she's helpful does?"
"Just watch what you say around her," Priya also tried to keep as quiet as possible so Scary Girl wouldn't turn her attention away from Damien.
Suddenly, a big yelp could be heard. "GAH, SPIDER!" Damien jumped out of his seat. "KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT!"
"I got it!" Priya removed her shoe and began to whack the table to try and stop the spider, but before she could get a good land, Scary Girl pushed her aside. "Hey, what was that for?"
"Ssshhh," Scary Girl put her finger to her lips before taking action herself. She grabbed a napkin, waited for the spider to crawl onto it and then trapped it with a cup. "I'm gonna go set this guy outside. Damien, come with me," Scary Girl motioned for him to follow her. Damien wasn't quite sure what was going to happen, but nonetheless obeyed her command as crossing someone who's chased you with a jackhammer probably isn't the best idea.
Scary Girl and Damien walked about 50 feet away from the dining hall before Scary Girl bent down and released the spider. "There you go little guy," she waved it off.
"Woah," Damien watched in shock. "I'm suprised, you'd seem like the type that would be overjoyed to watch someone else squish a spider."
"What? No, of course not," Scary Girl raised an eyebrow. "Why would I do that?"
"Well you're always talking about stuff like death and blood and how you wanna hide bodies and stuff," Damien pointed out. "So you're ok with killing people but not a spider?"
"Yeah, spiders are cool and don't hurt anyone. Humans are cruel," Scary Girl didn't bat an eye.
"I like to think there's good in everyone," Damien scratched the back of his neck.
"When you grow up in a circus, you realize that's not entirely true," Scary Girl countered.
"Care to elaborate?" Damien was curious.
"Well, I already told you a bit about where my strength comes from. Years and years of training to be as physically strong as I can be makes it harder to convince audiences that my performance acts really do give me a good challenge. I love my parents, but I've watched them do countless things to our circus animals from injecting them with strength serums to starving them for weeks on end, all in the name of selling out our shows to make maximum profit. And then there's my social life- it's already difficult to make friends when you've technically never been to a real school before, but it's even harder when you terrify everyone you see because getting called a "freak" makes you develop a certain sense of style over the years," Scary Girl sighed to herself.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, I wish I had known-"
"Don't be. I'm used to it," Scary Girl smiled at him.
"Are you sure?" Damien gave a sympathetic look.
"Positive," Scary Girl assured. "You know, Damien, you're the first guy who's genuinley been interested in talking to me in quite a while."
"Oh, uh, really?" Damien scratched the back of his neck.
"Mmhmm. The only guys who ever talk to me are interns at the circus who think my parents will promote them if they find out they're dating their daughter. If my creepy demenaor dosen't scare them right away, then they're gone as soon as they figure out… certain things about me," Scary Girl face shifted into a frown for a moment.
This caught Damien's attention. "What kind of things?"
"I don't think I'm ready for anyone to know. We're only so far into the game and I don't trust everyone here because I haven't gotten to know everyone well enough yet," Scary Girl shook her head.
"But we're friends, and Millie and Priya are our friends too. You can tell us anything!" Damien assured her.
"Oh don't worry, you guys are my friends, but the wrong information falling into the wrong hands can have devastating consequences for myself. As I said before, humans are cruel, and do some very twisted things for their own sense of personal enjoyment. It's why I stick up for the creepy crawlies like spiders. I know what its like to turn people away over something you can't control," Scary Girl pensively looked up at the sky.
"I'm sorry this has all happened to you. Is there anything I can do?" Damien asked.
"Just sticking by my side is good. I've learned that when life punches you with hate, you've gotta punch it right back. Having friends you can count on for support helps a lot with that."
"NEXT CHALLENGE! The field. 10 minutes!" the two heard a faint call from the dining hall speakers.
"We should get going. It was great to talk to you, Damien," Scary Girl smiled. "Walk to the challenge with me?"
"Of course," Damien blushed.
While Damien and Scary Girl had their hearfelt moment outside, meanwhile, at the Frog's table, the teammates were quietly chatting amongst themselves.
"I wonder how Julia's doing. Having your entire persona ruined can't be easy," Emma shuddered at the memory of the hate comments she received on her personal social media after her announcement she was leaving Three Guys and a Girl in a Beach House.
"At least it's her gone and not one of us. Plus did you see the way she was acting when she falsely accused me of spreading rumors yesterday? If we had to lose a teammate, I'm glad it's her," Bowie breathed a sigh of relief.
"I just wish the other team would boot Chase already! Just look at his smug face staring at me!" Emma glared over to where Chase was sitting with Zee.
"Yooo dude, Emma's looking this way," Chase elbowed Zee. "See, I told you she was still interested!"
"Um, that looks more like a glare dude," Zee was more focused on his burrito.
"Glare, loving gaze, same thing. I'll bet you that after today's challenge, she'll be right back in my arms," Chase folded his arms with confidence.
Thankfully for Zee, he didn't have to listen to Chase any longer because the speakers blasted a loud noise into the mess hall. As the campers all plugged their ears, Chris began to speak. "NEXT CHALLENGE! The field. 10 minutes!" He called out.
"Our team needs to win this challenge," Bowie told MK and Emma as they walked.
"Speaking of our team, where are the hockey bros?" Emma questioned.
"Sorry team!" Wayne called out as he and Raj ran to catch up with the others.
"We wanted to wear our lucky playoff beards for the challenge," Raj explained.
Confessional: Wayne and Raj
"When your hockey team is in the playoffs, shaving is bad luck!" Wayne dawned a large blonde beard and mustache.
"So everyone ends up with beards!" Raj showed off his.
"We can't grow them yet. These are fake!" Wayne pulled his down to show it wasn't actually attached to his chin.
"But eventually we'll be men," Raj added. "And we'll actually have to shave our faces."
"No fake beards? However shall we win without them," MK rolled her eyes.
"I don't know. Where could they be?" Raj didn't quite get MK's sarcasm.
"Maybe I ate them in my sleep! I'll check," Wayne crouched on the ground. "Cat style!" Wayne hurled like a cat coughing up a hairball while the others watched with a mix of amusement, impression and disgust.
"Wayne's good at this. One time he hacked up three pucks and a map of northern Saskatchewan," Raj told the others.
"Awww, I've always wanted a cat," Emma smiled.
Confessional: MK
"Yeah, I took their beards," she held them up to the camera. "Gonna auction them off on my new website, Things Total Drama Island Contestants Used to Own. Cha-ching!"
Wayne had hacked up a wallet, an old glove, a hockey puck and someone's keys, but still no beards. "Well if they ain't inside us, where are they?"
"No clue," MK tried to cover herself up. "Maybe someone from the other team snuck into our cabin while we were away. I don't trust Scary Girl."
"I had a lip balm go missing," Bowie added.
"Someone took my hairbrush!" Emma piped up.
"Sheesh, you can borrow mine later. No offense Emma, but you do not look fabulous today," Bowie attempted to not offend his friend.
"It's whatever. Hopefully we can catch that thief soon," Emma sighed.
"Okay!" Chris greeted the last of the campers as they arrived at the challenge spot. "Today's challenge is called 'stranger flings!'
"Each team gets their own state of the art medieval catapult. Which you will use to fling your teammates as far as you need to," Chef explained.
"Oh, uh, hold up. Fling?" Chase nervously asked.
"The goal is to land your teammates in one of three point value targets," Chef continued. "Land in the first one, that's 1,000 points. Second is 2,000 and third is-"
"3,000, got it" Bowie cut him off. "But what's with the craters in front of and behind each target?"
"Those are surprise penalty pits," Chris answered. "If you overshoot or undershoot your target, you land there."
"Ooh, what kind of surprises?" Scary Girl asked.
"Do you not understand how surprises work?" Chris shook his head.
"So if you land in the points section, exit out the door and come back to your team." Chef finished his explanation.
"So, is everyone ready to-" Chris began but was cut off by whimpering. "Chase? You ok?"
"Uh, uh yes, uh duuude, I'm just, I'm just-" Chase couldn't get his words out, to which Emma smirked.
Confessional: Emma
"Chase has never backed out of a dare; he's done it all, except for the slingshot ride at Eight Pennant Theme Park. He TOTALLY chickened out!"
"Ahem, I've just, it's just um, uh er eh… I'll call flinger. I said it first so I'll just work the catapult!" Chase stuttered out. "Yeah, it's no big deal."
"No no," Chris countered. "Every team member must take a turn being flung before anyone goes twice."
Chase grunted nervously as he chewed on his finger. "Ooooh no."
"The first team to reach 10,000 points wins, and the loser team will be sending someone home," Chris wrapped up his explanation.
"Last summer my parents sent me to catapult camp. So now I know all about torque, tension and angle!" Priya excitedly shared with Millie.
Confessional: Millie
"Who sends their kid to catapult camp? That is tragic, but it's also gold!" she said as she made some more notes.
"I know it's weird, so please don't tell anyone else that story," Pirya begged her friend.
"I won't say a word," Millie assured her.
Confessional: Millie
"But I am putting it in my book…"
"Ready. Set. BRING!" Chris set off an air horn to signal the start of the challenge.
"Who wants to be our first flinger?" Priya asked her team. Chase slowly took a few steps back.
"I guess I could do it," Millie raised her hand slightly.
"Awesome!" Priya enthusiastically cheered for her friend. "So to get the target, it requires the perfect flinging angle and for you to tuck at just the right time to fall right into it. Tuck when I say tuck!"
"Got it," Millie gave a thumbs up. "Are you 100% positive this is gonna work?"
"I've done all the calculations and if I'm correct, you'll be fine," Priya assured her friend.
"IF?" Millie asked in shock.
Confessional: Millie
"If I want Priya to keep helping me through these challenges so I can continue my research, I'm going to need to put myself at risk sometimes" Millie shuddered at the thought of what's to come in the game.
"If you're completely sure about this-WAHHH!" Millie screamed as she was flung into the air before she could finish her sentence. "AHHHHH….WHEEE! This is fun!" Millie said as she soared through the sky, realizing that while this was dangerous it was a super cool experience as well.
"TUCK, TUCK!" Priya yelled out. Millie heard her friends cries and complied, tucking her body in at just the right time to land into the 3,000 points zone.
"And that's 3,000 points for the Trout! Will the Frogs be able to catch up to this great lead?"
Confessional: Millie
"That was the most fun I've ever had!"
Wayne and Raj began cranking the wheel to setup the Frogs catapult. "Alright, who's up first?" MK asked her teammates.
Confessional: MK
"My plan is to still fly under the radar, but it's gonna be hard to do that if we keep losing challenges. I'm going to have to take charge sometimes."
"Let's do this!" Emma hopped into the catapult.
"Alrighty!" MK cheered.
"Just please don't launch until I say I'm read- AAAAAHHHH!" MK didn't quite hear Emma's request and flung her just a little too early.
"AAAAAHHHHH! AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Emma screamed loudly as she flew through the air.
"Man, Emma's got some pipes!" Chris commented as everyone else plugged their ears at the sound.
Luckily for Emma, even with the bad timing MK still had launched with a good angle, which caused her to land into the 2,000 point target.
"WOOHOO!" The hockey bros high-fived each other.
"And the frogs of death leap onto the scoreboard with 2,000 points!" Chris announced. "Can they get the at least 1,000 they need to catch up?"
"Yayyyy," Emma attempted to regain her balance as she exited the target, but unfortunately for her that didn't quite happen in time for her to not miss the nearby pit. Emma fell right into a barrel in the pit below and immediately heard a heavy breathing sound. "Um, what was that?"
"I was hoping this would happen," Chris chuckled. "Emma accidentally fell into a penalty zone so now she's got a mad rodeo bull to deal with!"
"Make it stop, make it stop!" Emma cried out as the bull tossed her around, to which Chris just laughed.
Wayne and Raj hopped into the catapult to be flung. "We're ordering a double double!" Wayne excitedly announced.
"Double points for the double threat!" Raj added.
"Don't you two look cozy!" Bowie commented.
"Well, uhm, haha, we're teammates," Raj half stuttered, half answered.
"No no no, safety first boys," Chef yelled out to the hockey players. "It's one at a time."
"Awww," the boys moaned in disappointment as Raj hopped down. "Go for it Wayner," he encouraged his bestie.
"On it!" Wayne high-fived Raj. He signaled MK that he was ready and she flung him. "Check it out Rajie, I'm reversing!" Wayne motioned his hands; pretending he was driving a car. "Beep, beep- oof!" Wayne crashed into an eagle and fell.
"That bird was off-site!" Raj angrily yelled as if he were at a hockey match.
"AHHH!" Wayne landed in the same pit that Emma had landed in earlier and ended up on the back of the mad bull. "Why is this cow so mad?"
"I'm coming Wayne!" Raj yelled out. "Aim for the cow!"
"Sorry Raj, but we need points," MK replied. "You can help him out after you land in the target," she flung him out.
"AHHHHHH!" Raj flew through the sky at a high speed.
"Ooh, that might be-" Chris waited until Raj landed, "too far!"
"MK, sweetie, maybe you should let someone else have a turn flinging," Bowie placed a hand on her shoulder.
"Finnee," MK rolled her eyes.
"Someone stop the world from spinning!" A very dizzy Emma walked up. Thanks to Wayne's distraction she had finally managed to get out of the bull pit.
"I would, but it would trigger massive earthquakes and tsunamis and I do not want that on my conscience," MK playfully responded.
Meanwhile, Raj attempted to keep himself afloat in the substance he had landed in- it appeared to be some kind of beige liquid and the pit was full of it. "I think I landed in barf!"
"Haha, no," Chris laughed. "Nope, it's tapioca pudding!"
"Ugh, that is the most evil-est pudding of all!" Bowie cringed.
Emma and MK gave disgusted looks as well. "Ugh, grody," MK shuddered.
"Guys, I got a cramp! I can't tread this tapioca much longer!" Raj swam for his life.
"Someone save my buddy Raj!" Wayne wished he could do it himself, but alas was still fighting off the mad bull.
"Put me in the pudding," Bowie nodded to Emma.
"While Bowie is about to get flung into the air, let's see how Wayne is doing on the ground," Chris looked over. The mad bull continued to kick Wayne around, however lucky for him the bull managed to kick him out of the pit and into the nearest target.
"Wayne scores! So now that is a total of 4,000 points for the frogs!" Chris proclaimed.
"Whoohoo!" Emma cheered, but ended up falling over in excitement.
MK chuckled. "And that's why I keep my celebrations pocket sized."
"4,000 points? How is that fair?" Priya angrily approached Chris. "Wayne landed in a penalty zone!"
"Wayne landed on the bull and never touched the ground until he landed in the points zone," Chef explained.
"Well no one mentioned that before we started the challenge! Damien, get in!" she gestured to the catapult.
"Me?" Damien gulped.
"Yes, you! Now move!" Priya stomped her feet. Damien nervously made his way to the catapult. "Remember to tuck on your descent," Priya reminded him as he climbed in. "You've got this Damien!"
"WOOOOAHHH!" Damien screamed as he was flung into the air. "HELP, HELP, SOMEBODY HELP!" He screamed as he flung his arms around in panic.
Scary Girl watched dreamily as Damien screamed for his life. "Isn't he just the best?"
"No, he's not tucking! Damien stop flailing your arms around and tuck!" Priya yelled.
Unfortunately Damien couldn't hear a word Priya was saying over the sound of his cries and ended up landing into the penalty pit behind the 1,000 point target.
Chris and Chef laughed while Chef grabbed his megaphone. "Damien has landed in a very crabby crab colony!"
"GAH!" Damien shook off the crabs that were pinching every part of his body. "At least it's just a bunch of Majoideas, or common spider crabs. While the pinches are painful, they're relatively harmless," Damien wiped the sweat from his brows and let our a sight. "Hey, Scary Girl was right, creepy crawlies like these can be kind of cute. And they can't seriously hurt me, so I shouldn't be freaking out. I've got nothing to worry about- wait, what was that?" a large rustling sound could be heard from behind. What Damien thought was just a giant red rock stood up to reveal itself to be an extremely large crab- hundreds of times the size of the smaller ones he had shook off.
"Watch out for the large mutant hermit crab! He does not like being told he's not threatening!" Chris continued to laugh.
"I know Scary Girl said to take a chance on things that seem frightening, but there is no known species of crab that grows to be this size! Where did you even get this?" Damien screamed as he ran for his life. He searched all around the pit for an exit, but the walls were just a little too tall for him to climb out. The crab was approaching him at a rapid pace, clapping it's claws and giving Damien a horrifying glare. "Someone, anyone, HELP!"
Scary Girl gasped, hopping into the catapult. She didn't even bother to ask Priya to pull the lever for her, she began to grab onto it to do it herself.
"SCARY GIRL, WAIT!" Priya tried to stop her. "I haven't calculated for your weight, nor when to ask you to tuck, nor winded the catapult to the correct angle-"
"I know what I'm doing!" Scary Girl insisted as she made the final pull to fling herself up. "WHEEEE!"
"She's not aiming for the target! What is she doing?" Priya gasped in shock.
Scary Girl positioned herself into a dive and swiftly landed in the crab penalty pit. Damien was still screaming for his life as the giant mutant crab got closer and closer. Scary Girl got up behind the crab and grabbed its legs. Before the crab could have any time to react, she flung it out of the pit as far as it could go- it ended up hitting some trees and getting knocked out about 20 feet away. Damien just stood in shock, eventually stumbling backwards because he wasn't paying attention to his surroundings, falling onto the ground.
"Sc-scary Girl?" Damien looked up.
"Yeesss?" Scary Girl turned around and smiled.
"I'm just shocked you came to save me. You said that you want to stick up for things that creep people out, not hurt them-"
"That crab was twice your size! As soon as something is a danger to me or my friends, that's when I have to step in and defend. Why do you think I took down those sharks, or that bear, or that raptor?" Scary Girl shook her head.
"Oh, that makes sense. Thank you so much, this is the third time now you've saved my life," Damien looked down. "Is there anything I can do to repay you?"
Scary Girl paused. There was one thing she wanted, but she decided against asking for it now. "We can talk about that later. Let's get back to our team, c'mon, I'll carry you," Scary Girl flung Damien over her shoulder. Hopping out of the pit was no trouble for her, and neither was quickly carrying him back to the Trout's catapult.
Confessional: Scary Girl
"Damien is the sweetest, friendliest guy I've ever met with the best screams I've ever heard. I still need to be cautious but… I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tempted to ask for a kiss in that moment. Or maybe even a bite!" Scary Girl squealed.
"Oh my god, Damien, are you ok?" Priya, Millie and Zee rushed to his aid.
"I'm alright," Damien said, sliding off of Scary Girl's back.
"Um, you were supposed to land in the target, not in a penalty pit. She clearly did that on purpose!" Chase folded his arms.
"Did you want to lose a teammate today? If so, I can make sure it's you who we lose," Scary Girl slowly walked up to him with a menacing look.
"No no, I'm good! Uh, who's next, Priya?" sweat was dripping down Chase's face.
"Yeah, let's do this!" Priya quickly cranked the catapult to her desired angle and hopped in. "Fling me, Millie!"
"You betcha!" Millie pulled the lever and sent Priya flying.
"And Priya's in the sky! Can she land to make up for the Trout's two previous failures in a row?"
"Go Priya!" Millie, Damien and Zee cheered.
"Aww, she's not screaming," Scary Girl pouted, which earned her weird looks as always.
"Wooohooo!" Priya shouted in excitement as she soared.
Confessional: Millie
"I don't know, this challenge is kinda fun! So I'm enjoying it- it's ok to have fun while doing research!"
Priya tucked at the perfect time and landed in the 3,000 point pit. "And that brings the trout's score to 6,000! And Priya's jumping for joy about it!"
"Yahoo!" Priya bounced on one of the mattresses in the target.
Confessional: Priya
"I won't lie, I never thought catapult camp would turn out to be useful, but woo! Thanks mom and dad!
Everyone had been so focused on Damien and Scary Girl's commotions that they had forgotten about Bowie being launched. "Look, Bowie's gonna make it!" Emma yelled as she watched him gracefully fly through the sky.
Confessional: Bowie
"What, you think Priya's the only one who trained for this? I'm mind and body fierce."
"Looks like Bowie's gonna score another 3,000 points for the Frogs!" Chris stated as Bowie landed in the target. To his shock, after scoring the points Bowie hopped out and dove into the penalty zone behind. "What is this? Looks like someone's a fan of tapioca after all! I just hope he can save Raj from the sharks!"
"The what?" Chef whipped his head around.
"The WHAT?" Emma and MK looked up with a mix of shock and anger.
"Did I not mention the pudding sharks?" Chris asked. "Why am I always forgetting the sharks? It's like I've got some kind of memory problem!" Chris shook his head.
Meanwhile, Bowie and Raj were about to have their own little moment. As Raj desperately tried to keep himself afloat, Bowie swam over and let Raj grab onto him. "Hey there," Bowie said with a flirtatious tone.
"Bowie! What are you doing here?" Raj was very happy to see the boy.
"I'm here to save you, silly!" Bowie assured him before seeing a shark fin move by in the distance. "We should probably-"
Before Bowie could finish his sentence, he felt Raj's lips press against his. Bowie was shocked at first, but after a second or two, realized what was happening and kissed back. Unbeknownst to the couple, Wayne had also been making his way to the pit to help Raj out and came just in time to watch everything unfold.
Confessional: Bowie
"Okay, interesting," Bowie grinned.
Confessional: Raj
"That felt…right," Raj scratched the back of his neck as he smiled.
Confessional: Wayne
"So I ran over to help my bud and what did I see? Raj. Kissing. Bowie!" Wayne excitedly talked to the camera. "Face kissing! On the face! That happened bro!" Wayne smiled happily before coming to a realization. "Okay, I can't celebrate with him until he tells me. He's for sure gonna know now tho! This is it!"
"That was uh," Raj sputtered out as he pulled away, "I've been thinking about kissing you and-"
"Hey, let's talk about this after we get away from these sharks," Bowie started to pull Raj to help him out of the pit.
"The sharks? They should be in San Jose. They've got a home game tonight," Raj didn't quite understand what Bowie meant, but that was ok. The nearby shark was so happy for Bowie and Raj's newfound romance it had forgotten all about eating them.
"The Frogs of death lead with 7,000 points! While the not-so-Ferocious Trout have 6,000!" Chris excitedly displayed the score. "You know what that means!"
"We're almost done?" Chef grinned.
"It's time for the lightning round!" Chris grabbed his megaphone. "Campers, there is now a winner-takes-all bullseye!"
"A new target?" Emma questioned.
"Yeah, this won't be dangerous at all," MK rolled her eyes.
"Winner takes all? Why is it never winner shares all?" Zee pouted.
"Sush! I wanna hear the instructions!" Priya snapped.
"The target is worth 10,000 points! And it's 10,000 feet away! And all you have to do is fly through this lightning storm!" Chris instructed. An eagle attempted to fly through the storm, but got struck which cooked it into a nice turkey-like dinner.
"That's a serious storm cloud!" Millie pointed out.
"Yes it is!" Chris enthusiastically agreed. "But if you land in the target, it's an immediate win. So campers, what's it gonna be?"
"That's a bit far," Damien commented as the Trout huddled up.
"It's our only chance to win this in one shot!" Priya rebutted. "I know I can calculate the trajectory and tension needed!
"Me! Fling me!" Millie offered.
"The rules say everyone has to take a turn before anyone goes twice! It's gotta be Chase or Zee," Priya shook her head.
"NOT ME! Zee, how about you go?" Chase pushed Zee towards the middle of the circle.
"Ok, I'll do it. What game are we playing?" Zee asked naively.
"I just have to fling you 10,000 feet through a storm cloud so we can win?" Priya tried to make it sound the least scary she could, but it was no use.
"Aw bro, did I say yes to that?" Zee remained indifferent.
Confessional: Zee
"To fly that far, you've gotta think light thoughts," Zee fluttered his hands like birds. "Which is pretty heavy."
"Ya know, this is exactly how I lost my leg," Zee turned to Damien as he got into the catapult.
"Wait, I thought you lost it because you fell into a pit of piranhas?" Damien was confused.
"True story, I was flung by a catapult into the piranha pit," Zee explained.
Confessional: Zee
"Not a true story. Fabricated it man. Brain game!"
"Ok, we're already winning!" Emma announced in the Frog's huddle up.
"Right. So why try for 10,000 points-" MK started
"-if we only need 3,000, which we know we can do" Bowie finished.
"Cool, it's settled, we're gonna play safe and just fling me 3,000 feet. Let's do this!" Mk pumped her fist as she hopped in the catapult. "Fling me Emma!"
"You got it!" Emma pulled the lever and sent MK flying.
Meanwhile, on the Trout's side, Zee was ready to go as well. "Catch you on the other siiiiiiddddeeeeee!" he called out as Priya pulled the lever.
"I can't watch" Chef covered his eyes as he saw MK and Zee fly by.
"And they're off!" Chris excitedly leaned back.
"Hey, what's up MK?" Zee saw her flying below him. "Woah what a beaut! I've never been this high before."
"Just trying to win for my team," MK wasn't super interested in conversation.
"OMG, me too! We're like twins!" Zee smiled.
"Oh no! Zee's dropping too early!" Priya got up on Millie's shoulders to see better. "He's not gonna make it to the target!"
MK looked down and saw the 3,000 point target approaching. She began to tuck in order to drop into it on time. "Oh no, leaving already? Bummer," Zee looked disappointed.
"ZEE!" Priya yelled. "You can still win this! Drop some weight!"
Zee threw the soda can he was holding onto the ground. "Recycle yourself little buddy!"
MK continued to plunge towards the earth. "See ya on the flip side, moolo," she continued to drop to the point where she almost couldn't see Zee anymore.
"Wait, what's a moolo?" Zee called out.
"The fact that you have to ask makes you even more moolo!" MK yelled as she made one final tuck. (AN: yes, I still had to include this gag, it's one of my favorites of the season). She dove straight down- right into the 3,000 points zone.
"And the frogs of death have won the challenge!" Chris cheered as the scoreboard raised the Frog's score to 10,000 points. "Ferocious Trout, see you tonight at elimination."
"But Zee hasn't landed yet! If he gets in the target, we'd have more points than them!" Priya tried to negotiate with Chris.
"The rule was that whichever team was first to reach 10,000 is the winner. The Frogs may have less when Zee lands in the target, but they were the first to get the 10,000 points needed to win." Chef shrugged.
All of the members of the Frogs cheered loudly for their victory while the Trout booed in disappointment.
"Zee you can come down. We lost the challenge," Chase yelled out, but got no response from the amputee. Zee had flown to the point of where even the loudest yells from the ground couldn't be heard; and was still trying to get himself to the 10,000 point target.
"I gotta drop more weight!" Zee frantically looked around for something he could easily get rid of, and settled on detaching and throwing off his prosthetic leg. He slowly started to rise further up.
"Um, that's not how the laws of physics work," Millie commented.
Zee slowly flew into the lightning storm and was quickly struck by a lighting bolt. The world around him began to spin, and weird bright colors appeared everywhere.
"Woah, four fingers," Zee wiggled his hand in front of his face in the trance he was in. All of the clouds around him had changed their forms in this hallucinatory state to look like sea creatures; Zee grabbed hold of a "dolphin" and rode it around until it dropped him off into what appeared to be a giant soda can, but was actually the 10,000 point target. As he landed, Zee fell out of his hallucinatory trip.
"That was wild," Zee sighed happily as he relaxed on a mattress in the target.
"Well now that Zee's landed, we now have 16,000 points to their 10,000. Maybe you'll change your mind?" Priya begged Chris.
"All wins are final. Zee, hurry it up, we don't have all day," Chris called on his megaphone as he walked away.
The Trout walked to their cabin to get ready for dinner, and some members decided to chat amongst themselves.
"So, who should we send home? Scary Girl did kinda miss her target on purpose," Millie offered to Priya.
"I still think she could be a good alliance member," Priya rebutted. "She considers me a friend, and she seems to have a thing for Damien. The four of us working together could better ensure we make it further when the merge hits," Priya explained.
"Wait, back up. She has a thing for Damien?" Millie questioned.
"Shoot," Priya said, halting in her tracks. "I don't know if she wanted me to share that with anyone, and Scary Girl is kinda the last person here who I want to get on the bad side of…"
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you told me," Millie assured Priya.
"Aww, thanks bestie, I know I can always count on you," Priya smiled.
Confessional: Millie
"Did Priya just call us…besties?" Millie squealed.
"Millie! Priya!" Chase called out. "Come with me. We need to have a team meeting. Pronto," he ran up to the BFFS.
"Uhh, why?" Millie raised an eyebrow.
"Just do it," Chase grabbed both of their arms and began to pull them towards the Trout cabin.
"Please don't touch me," Priya pushed him off. "But sure, we'll hear you out."
"Good. Because I've got a lot to say," Chase grumbled.
Priya and Millie entered the cabin to see Zee, Damien and Scary Girl already waiting. "Alright, everyone's here now. I have something I need to say about tonight's elimination."
"What's up Chase brah?" Zee asked. "You guys aren't gonna vote me off right? Cuz' I was so close to winning it for us, but I didn't quite make the target-"
"No Zee, you did really well," Priya assured him. "We really appreciate your effort. Let's listent to what Chase has to say."
"I gathered everyone here to say I have a good idea of who we should all vote for. We could have won this," Chase glared, "If some of us had taken this challenge seriously and done what they needed to do to ensure that points were being scored," he gestured to Scary Girl. "We all saw how instead of aiming for the target like she was supposed to, she purposefully landed in the penalty pit to help Damien."
"She saved my life dude, please leave her alone," Damien glared at Chase. "You didn't even take a turn flying because you were too scared to go. You can't get upset because someone didn't quite make their target when you didn't even aim for a target at all."
"It's hilarious how pathetic you are Damien," Chase crossed his arms, shook his head and chuckled. "Imagine being so much of a wimp that you had to wait for a girl to come and save you from something you could have easily fought off yourself."
"Um, did you see the size of that giant crab? That thing could have snapped my head off!" Damien retorted. "Personally, I'm thankful someone came and rescued me."
"Real men don't wait for girls to come and save them, they man up and fight themselves. God, you're acting like Emma when she dumped me. Not cool dude," Chase scorned.
Damien stood in shock at Chase's comments while Priya, Millie and Scary Girl looked like they were ready to throw hands. "Um, what do you mean by that?" Millie was holding back Priya from attacking Chase right then and there.
"None of you sissies would get it. We men are the dominant sex and thus hold the power of society and this team. We shouldn't have to depend on you three for us to be able to go far. Right Zee?" Chase elbowed his friend.
"Um no dude," Zee brushed Chase's arm off of him. "You've been making these types of comments ever since Ripper's elimination and they're making me uncomfortable. Please stop."
"Oh Zee, my man, I need to show you one of Anthony Crate's podcasts at some point. You'll understand all of my points and be on my side after just the first few minutes," Chase said with confidence, but was met with blank stares. "If the two of us team up using Crate's alpha male strategies, we'll knock out all the sissies and wimps and make it to the final two like it's nothing."
"You listen to ANTHONY CRATE?" Priya flew her arms up.
"Timeout. Who's Anthony Crate?" Damien asked.
"Of course you've never heard of him," Chase rolled his eyes.
"He's an extremely misogynistic influencer who makes podcasts about how women are property and don't deserve to be treated as equals. He's pretty homophobic as well," Millie explained while continuing to hold Priya back, but feeling some really strong negative emotions herself..
"And this is who you listen to for life advice!? Chase, what is wrong with you?" Damien took a step back.
Confessional: Millie
"My generation has quite a few problems with it. The fact that people my age are willing to revert to gender roles from the 60's just because some celebrity influencers on social media told them to is by far one of societie's biggest failures," she furiously wrote in her notebook.
"Anthony Crate is right. If we want to win challenges, you three," Chase gestured to Priya, Millie and Scary Girl, "need to step down and know your place. Follow our orders and do what we tell you to do. Everyone knows that women can't make good decisions or be capable leaders on their own."
"That's enough Dude," Zee snapped. "You've been harshing on girls in a majorly uncool way. I've been trying hard to tell you that girls can be homies, but you've never once listened to me. You keep throwing out all of these insults when girls are just as cool as guys and do all the same things we can but I always get put down. Not cool dude, not cool at all," Zee turned his back to Chase.
"What else has he said?" Priya asked.
"Before Ripper's elimination we tried to make a 'guys alliance' where both of them were making comments about how the three of us would dominate the game because we're 'chaded alpha males'," Zee explained.
"People say that unironically?" Millie made some more notes.
"He also said some stuff about how Emma isn't very smart for breaking up with him, because girls like her can't make decisions on their own," Zee added.
"Didn't you nearly kill her by cutting the breaks on her car?" Damien glared.
"Who cares? She barely even got a scratch from that. At least I'm not a beta simp like you," Chase rolled his eyes.
Confessional: Scary Girl
"I normally love it when people are put into near death situations. I bet it would have been hilarious to see Emma walk out of a wrecked car covered in bruises. But calling her not smart? Calling me, Priya and Millie weak? Calling Damien a beta simp? Get the fuck out of here Chase."
"You think you're such a tough guy huh?" Scary Girl had mostly been silent for this conversation, but she was about to snap. "You didn't even fly during the challenge because you were too scared."
"And if I had, I would have landed on the target, because I'm not some puny little princess in shining armor who needed to save her pitiable excuse for a knight," Chase mocked.
"You know, I haven't had to threaten someone seriously beyond just giving them enough of a fright to piss their pants or have a couple nightmares in a long time, but you've pushed through just about all of my patience Chase," Scary Girl took a few more steps forward.
"Um, Scary Girl, you might be going a bit far," Damien tried to intervene.
"She did threaten me with a spoon the other day," Priya warned.
"A spoon can't hurt anyone," Damien attempted to defend her.
"No, it can't. But this can!" Scary Girl ran up and socked Chase in the face as hard as she could, giving him a huge black eye and toppling to the ground.
"YOU'RE INSANE! GET THIS FREAK AWAY FROM ME!" Chase began to run.
"Awww, the 'chaded alpha male,' can't handle a little punch from a girl? Who's the pathetic one now?" Scary Girl taunted as he ran.
Damien, Priya, Millie and Zee stood in shock, trying to process what just happened.
"Oh don't worry!" Scary Girl turned around and ressaured the rest of the Trout. "You guys are my friends and I don't hurt my friends on purpose, I only like seeing them get hurt by accident like in challenges and stuff. I won't punch any of you!" She smiled.
"Good to know, heh," Priya was still trembling with fear.
Confessional: Scary Girl
"Seeing everyone's passionate hatred for Chase was just so exhilirating! Like I said earlier, when people throw punches at you for who you are, you've gotta punch them back. Good riddance, Chase."
"Ferocious trout! Elimination ceremony starts in 10 minutes. Be there or it's you going home!" Chris's voice boomed through the loudspeakers.
Confessional: Millie
"Scary Girl is terrifying. I know that messing with her can get me into serious trouble. At the same time, the things that Chase said were not ok and I will not tolerate having someone who doesn't view me as an equal on my team."
Confessional: Zee
"Whew! It felt good to finally be able to speak my mind," Zee pumped his fist in the air. "Girls are great, guys are great, everyone's great. Except people like Chase who don't seem to agree."
"Alright campers, you know the drill," Chris said as they sat down. "Ferocious trout, you guys have some really smart members, but you need to work on your timing a bit better. You could have won if you were just a little faster, and that's why you're all here tonight. Chef?"
"Damien," Chef started.
Damien gulped.
"Instead of heading straight back to your team so they could send off the next flyer after landing in a penalty zone, you ran around screaming and getting chased. This is becoming a pattern for you," Chef pointed to him.
Confessional: Damien
"He and Chris are the ones who put that crab there without warning! Why is he acting like it's a surprise I had such an adverse reaction!?"
"Scary Girl" Chef moved on.
Scary Girl perked up.
"Instead of aiming for a target, you purposefully landed in a penalty zone. You're another major part of the reason why your team couldn't score the points needed to win before the Frogs-"
"That's what I was saying man! We've all got to vote for her!" Chase stood up.
"Chase, I was just about to get to you. Sit down," Chef ordered. "Chase, you made a bunch of misogynistic comments towards the female members of your team. Not exactly the best way to ensure they want to vote with you at eliminations."
"Ughh, you're all a bunch of betas," Chase rolled his eyes.
"Alright campers! As always, if you get a marshmallow, you're safe. Priya," Chris tossed out the first one.
"Millie."
"Zee."
"And the penultimate marshmallow goes too…Damien," Chris tossed it and Damien breathed a sigh of relief.
"And the last marshmallow goes too…."
Confessional: Damien
"As glad as I am that I'm safe, this is worrying. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm going to be very upset if Scary Girl is gone," Damien looked at the ground sadly before making a realization. "Because she's helped me a lot in the competition and saved my life multiple times! I need her to stay safe! That's the only reason," Damien crossed his arms firmly.
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"Scary Girl. Sorry Chase, but it's the 21st century. Comments like that don't really fly around here."
"Whatever. I didn't need this stupid competition anyways. I'll have you all know that I already have a million dollars I made off my youtube channel" Chase began to rise up.
"Chef, make sure he actually gets to the dock. Given all of the sexist comments he made today I think it's best we ensure he doesn't stick around and go feral," Chris nodded to his co-host.
"Wait what," Millie and Damien raised their eyebrows.
"Man, I really gotta sit you two down and have you watch the old TD seasons," Priya made a mental note.
Chef and Chris both watched as Chase made his way down the dock. "Hmm, I wonder what fans of Chase's youtube channel will have to say about his episode?" Chris turned to Chef.
"Watch that subscriber count drop quicker than James Charles," Chef chuckled.
Chase said nothing but flipped both Chris and Chef off as the drone carried him away. "Who will be next to walk the dock of shame? Find out next time on Total. Drama. Island!"
Unbeknownst to everyone else, while the elimination ceremony was going down, a certain beanie wearer was taking her sweet time in the confessional.
"Raj. Kissing. Bowie!" a video of Wayne was displayed on the bright purple phone for the girl's viewing pleasure.
"Oh ho ho, what do we have here?" MK smirked. "This information totally won't be useful for me." She checked through a small hole in the wood of the confessional walls to make sure no one was nearby, then unplugged the phone and crept her way into Chris's editing booth. Being that it was late at night, all of the editors had already retreated to their sleeping quarters. MK pulled on the door only to find it was locked. "Aw man, looks like my plan is crushed- JK!" MK pulled a hairpin out of her pocket and used it to pick the door's lock. She carefully opened and closed the door silently and made her way to one of the computers to get her hands on today's episode's footage. Once she found the clip of Bowie and Raj kissing in the tapioca pit, she took a quick screenshot and printed as many copies of it as she could. "Time to put plan MK into action," MK rubbed her hands together while she gave a devilish smirk before tucking away the copies into her jacket and heading back to the frog's cabin.
Votes
Chase: Damien, Priya, Scary Girl, Millie, Zee
Scary Girl: Chase