Fairytale of Doom

By CrimsonStarbird

Chapter Twenty – Now's Your Moment, Floating in a Blue Lagoon

Laxus and Erza couldn't have appeared less like returning heroes as they traipsed through this world's Imperial Capital. There were no kites circling above them, no serpentine dragon costumes weaving through the streets, no cheering crowds, no glorious fireworks – only a quietude as deep and empty as the company of ghosts at their back. Laxus may not have known any more about the story of Mulan than its name, but this wouldn't pass for a heroes' welcome in any world.

At least they rode on horseback. While Erza may have been under the impression that she'd won them their mounts by throwing around the name of famed General Mulan, Laxus suspected the terrified stablehand had really handed them over because the makeshift splint around her broken sword-arm had done little to detract from her fearsome aura. Laxus rode behind her, just in case she succumbed to her injuries and fell – not that he'd dare say it out loud. Fortunately, she hadn't questioned why he was letting her lead the way. After all, he'd tumbled into her story, not the other way round.

"Do not let your guard down," Erza warned him, in a low voice. He bristled at the implication that he might have considered doing otherwise, but saw no merit in starting an argument. "Levy informed me that this is the scene where Shan Yu infiltrates the victory pageant being held for Mulan's unit to try and assassinate the emperor. We must prevent the attack and defeat our final foe."

Laxus said nothing. It was pointless to claim that things had clearly gone wrong in their story when they had never been right from the start. Still Erza rode onwards, shoulders square, advance unyielding, her bearing that of a general, rigidly clinging to the scraps of story she could remember.

They were met at the foot of the palace's stone steps by an imperial messenger, flanked by three guards on each side. He wore bright colours trimmed with fur, inappropriate for the warm urban night but not for the opulence surrounding them.

"General Mulan!" he proclaimed, eyes wide. "We believed you were dead! Thank the heavens for your miraculous survival! How did you manage it?"

"It was good fortune, nothing more," Erza informed him gravely. "We happened to be close enough to an overhang when the avalanche hit, and could fight our way to safety."

The messenger shook his head in awe. "Truly, you must be blessed. But your arm! We must have it seen to by a healer at once!"

"Nonsense. I am perfectly well. Of more concern is the fact that the emperor is in grave danger. The assassins could be making their way towards him as we speak under the cover of…" She glanced left and right, a frown touching her lips. "Why are you not in the middle of a festival?"

"We held a muted celebration last night to recognize the defeat of Shan Yu's army and honour the sacrifices of our fallen soldiers," the messenger explained, before misinterpreting Erza's severe expression and adding hastily, as so many would have scrambled to do, "but had we known you survived, Honoured General, we would most certainly have waited for your return-"

"But if the celebration happened without us, the emperor must have been assassinated!"

"The emperor? Assassinated? I fear I do not follow, General. The emperor is alive and perfectly well."

Erza's frown deepened. "Then Shan Yu did not try to take his vengeance?"

"General, Shan Yu is dead. Your noble efforts at Tung Shao Pass saw to that."

"That's not right. He can't be dead. We haven't been transported home yet."

"We searched the area and found nothing. Neither hide nor hair has been seen of the Huns since the avalanche – not Shan Yu, nor any of the barbarians who follow him. None of them survived."

"If we survived, then so could he. He must be up to something." Erza's attention snapped forward like a physical strike, as though a hundred Heaven's Wheel swords were sharpened and sighted along the length of her gaze. "I must see the emperor at once."

Taken aback by the sudden demand, the messenger took a small step backwards. "I'm afraid that is impossible, even for you, great General. His Imperial Majesty is not to be disturbed on a whim."

"It is imperative that you let me through. I must speak to the person in charge."

"Out of the question."

"I see. Then, I am sorry to do this, but it is for your own good."

Erza nudged her steed with her heels, and it began to turn away. Detachedly, Laxus wondered if she was taking her leave… no, no, of course not, she was merely twisting so that her broken arm was angled away from the soldiers, her gauntleted left fist raised towards them.

The palace guards recognized the gesture too. Blades were drawn, and pikes lowered; one reached for a whistle at his belt. One sudden move and the entire army would come swarming down upon them.

Laxus wondered, for a moment, if he shouldn't just let this play out. Erza would probably win. Being trapped in a world without magic hadn't hampered her ability to pull off miracles through sheer strength of character. The fact that she was outnumbered and wounded probably only made her victory more assured. Besides, if she wanted help, she'd have asked for it.

Then again, this battle was just so… avoidable.

He jumped down from his horse in an easy movement. Cautious but not meek, he held up his empty palms and stepped forwards, putting himself between Erza and the messenger.

"Gentlemen," he addressed the imperial guards. "I believe there may have been a misunderstanding. Do you know who I am?"

It wasn't an open threat; not like Erza towering over them on her horse. The emperor's guards would fight until the end, and with them at his back, the fur-wrapped messenger had no need to fear martial might. He, the weak link in the chain, was susceptible from a very different angle.

"W-Well- you-" the messenger stammered, suddenly noticing the lack of the Imperial Kingdom's seal on his armaments the way it glinted upon Erza's borrowed sheath and cloak.

"I am Prince Phillip, heir to the Guardian Kingdom," he asserted, turning to display the enchanted sword at his hip. "The Sword of Truth I carry is the proof of my noble lineage. I travelled to this kingdom at your emperor's request under the terms of our old alliance, to assist his armies against the might of the Huns."

He assembled the story from the fragments the squire he had first met in this world had unintentionally given him, weaving threads of plausible logic between the bare bones of his story with a confidence that would not be easily denied. Through it he entwined the terminology he had heard them use, stating unfamiliar titles with the arrogance and certainty of a prince who belonged in this world, and hoping against hope he didn't get anything wrong.

"I wonder if my kingdom has heard of my disappearance at Tung Shao Pass yet. How will they react, do you think, to learn that their heir was lost by the folly of an allied nation's troops? How long do you think our partnership will hold up then? If I were your emperor, I would want to know that Prince Phillip had survived as soon as possible, to quell the Guardian Kingdom's demands for restitution for my spilled blood."

"W-Well…" he tried again.

"I suggest that you let us through. Or do you want to be the one responsible for our two allied nations falling into war?"

The messenger was sweating profusely now. "No, of course not, Your Highness."

"Then I shall go and inform the emperor at once." He started forwards, and sure enough, the messenger stepped aside for him. "General Mulan, please do me the honour of accompanying me to the throne room. While we are there, we can pass on the worrying information we learned during the battle about another potential threat to the emperor's life, and ensure he is adequately prepared."

After a moment, Erza slid down from her horse, barely wincing at the movement of her arm in its makeshift splint. They walked up the steps in silence until, at long last, the glares of the guards fell away. They were in.

Laxus wondered, briefly, if Erza was going to thank him for his intervention, but all she said was, "I had it covered."

"I never said you didn't." It came out more aggressive than intended, and he followed it up quickly: "I just wanted to test out what kind of authority I have in this world. It might come in handy later."

She mulled this over in a silence that wasn't hostile, but clearly didn't buy his hasty attempt to smooth things over. Neutrally, she said, "You were surprisingly persuasive."

"Is that a surprise?"

A slight, one-shouldered shrug. "It is the skill of a politician, not a fighter."

"I was going to be Guild Master once," he reminded her.

"Were you?"

There was a note of cynicism in her voice, and he couldn't work out why. "You do recall that little incident where I made you all fight each other and threatened to drown Magnolia in lightning bolts unless Gramps surrendered his title to me, don't you?"

"The Battle of Fairy Tail wasn't about you becoming Master," she dismissed. "It was about proving that you were better than us, nothing more."

Laxus stopped in his tracks. The hem of his coat thumped around his ankles; silence echoed louder than footsteps up the deserted staircase. "I think I would know why I did it!"

"You were there to destroy your grandfather's legacy, not create your own." She hadn't drawn her sword, but she didn't need to, when her words could cut just as surely. "You had put no thought into what it would mean to become the leader of the guild. You didn't even care if Fairy Tail survived what you were putting it through. You just wanted to prove you were the strongest. I think no small part of you is glad you lost, as it meant you never had to go through with it."

Laxus stared, speechless. The words had come so easily to him earlier, against opponents who were predictable, manipulable, minor obstacles on their ridiculous adventure. Against this scarlet-haired warrior staring down at him from the top of the staircase, as if the few steps between them separated heaven and earth, good and evil, protagonist and sidekick – he had nothing.

But the great gates at the top of the staircase were already opening, and the emperor's personal guards were beckoning them inside, and there was no opportunity for words anyway as their misadventure dragged them deeper into the palace.

Kiss the Girl.

Gray knew it, alright. It had been his and Cana's least-favourite part of The Little Mermaid when they were younger. This was partly because it had too much soppy romance and not enough impaling of giant sea-witches for the two young mages. But it was also because it was frustrating. Eric and Ariel's story could have found its happily ever after then and there if Eric had grown a backbone and kissed his true love.

Gray wouldn't make the same mistake.

He could make the scene go the way his eight-year-old self had wanted, shouting futilely at the lacrima-projection of Prince Eric.

"Is everything alright here?" came an anxious voice.

Juvia was approaching the two of them. From the corner of his eye, Gray saw Cana's gaze turn briefly predatory, before smoothing over into a blinding smile that he knew from experience meant he would be waking up with a hangover if he didn't get out fast.

"Unfortunately, there are only two boats available," Cana breezed.

Juvia's gaze flicked to the dozen or so little rowboats bobbing over Cana's shoulder.

"Those ones are all broken," Cana assured her. "Furthermore, it's very dangerous for more than two people to go in a single boat."

"Juvia is sure we could-"

"Oh, no. Health and safety regulations are a curse on every world, fairytale realms included. Looks like we'll have to split up."

With a very obvious wink, Cana pushed Gray towards Juvia. "Have fun, kids, and I'll see you on the other side."

Clearly very pleased with herself, Cana swaggered over to the boats and began untethering one from the dock. Gray gave a minute shrug. "Well, Juvia, I guess we should-"

Juvia said, quietly but firmly, "Juvia wants to ride with Cana."

"…Eh?" Cana choked.

"Juvia is determined not to be so clingy with Gray."

"But you two have been getting on so well recently!"

"Maybe so, but Juvia wants to spend time with her other friends, too."

Oh, no. This was not what Gray had been after at all. His tongue felt strangely thick in his mouth, the words lumpy: "No, no, it's fine, I'd actually quite like to ride with you, Juvia-"

"Juvia is riding with Cana," the water mage asserted.

And that was how Gray became the third wheel in his own big romantic scene.

It was in something of a daze that Gray pushed his little rowing boat off from the jetty. He fell automatically into a rhythm, lean and pull, lean and pull, but even though the shore shrunk and shrunk behind him, he didn't seem to be going anywhere at all.

Where was the singing crab? Where was the descending halo of fireflies, the hidden enclave of the willow, the serenading pond life?

As a child, he had thought Prince Eric an idiot for not kissing the girl while he had the chance. How much more of an idiot was he, Gray, for failing to even get the opportunity in the first place?

Every time his gaze fell upon the empty seat in front of him, one question drifted across his mind: how had he got things this wrong?

Lean and pull. Lean and pull. The surface of the lake was so still, this should have been easy, and yet Cana and Juvia's boat was only getting further away.

He knew, rationally, that he didn't have a right to feel disappointed. For so long, his complaints about Juvia's clinginess had fallen on deaf ears; Juvia had ploughed through them like Gildarts through a guildhall wall, while his friends had nodded indulgently and continued pushing them together. Now, at last, he had what he wanted.

Juvia, respecting his personal space. Being damn cool in battle. Saving all their skins, and not losing an iota of concentration in his presence. Considering her friends to be as important as her crush.

This… was what he wanted, wasn't it?

The empty seat in front of him felt heavier than nothingness had any right to feel.

Hell. Was he jealous? Jealousy was the only thing he was less entitled to than disappointment.

Juvia still loved him. She had all but told him so – and the fairytale world had given them its blessing, restoring Juvia's magic to her in the nick of time. And even without water magic or miraculous saves or narrative convention to reinforce it, the underlying truth was even simpler: she had loved him enough to change for him.

She had abandoned her childish behaviour, overcome her possessive nature, surpassed her stalkerish paranoia… she had grown past it all to become the ideal version of herself: caring but not obsessed, strong but not scary, in love with him but not letting herself be defined by it.

It was everything he had ever wanted.

So… why didn't he want it?

Glancing over at where Juvia and Cana seemed engaged in a very serious conversation, he suddenly realized that it wasn't jealousy or disappointment he felt, looking at them.

It was guilt.

Because Juvia – the old Juvia – would have been having so much fun stuck in the Kiss the Girl scene with him.

Her, the overly enthusiastic princess, and him, the embarrassed and awkward prince trying to weasel out of the romantic setup without being too obvious about it. Hell, maybe that was why there were no singing turtles: she'd have been scrambling to provide her own entertainment to win him over in their version of the classic scene, and he'd have been looking for excuses and distractions with his fingers crossed for Flotsam and Jetsam's timely intervention.

Oh, he would have hated it. But she would have had the time of her life, smiling and laughing and being her usual exuberant self, and… he wouldn't really have been able to hate it, in the face of such delight.

That, he thought, was the reason why the empty seat weighed so heavily upon him. It wasn't just Juvia's absence. It was the absence of everything she usually brought with her.

That sheer zest for life. Those crazy antics that brought unpredictability to daily life in the guildhall; not just for him, but for all their friends, who had accepted the ex-Phantom mage so warmly into their ranks. Her enthusiasm was unmatched in heaven and earth. Just because he didn't want it turned towards the art of wooing him didn't mean he could stand to see it gone forever – and yet there it was, dissolving into an uncomfortable conversation with Cana when it should have been lighting up the entire lake, sha-la-la-ing crabs or otherwise.

In becoming the perfect person for him, she had lost the quirky joy that had made her so quintessentially Juvia.

He'd gained a perfect love interest.

But he'd lost Juvia Lockser.

And he didn't want that. Juvia, his Juvia, was infuriating and terrifying and he would never see her in a romantic way… but he would rather have her in his life as a friend than this happily ever after with a shadow of her, perfect but empty.

He wanted the old Juvia back.

He wanted…

And as he stared across the lake where he had failed at true love's kiss for an entirely different reason to Prince Eric, he suddenly remembered another important part of The Little Mermaid.

"Honestly, Juvia, you're never going to win your man like this," Cana chastised.

She was leaning back, arms spread along the prow of the boat like it was some sort of high-backed throne, surveying her captive audience. Juvia had offered to take the first turn at rowing, and Cana had agreed; if she had to take part in this awkward situation of crashing Gray's date, she was at least going to get a nice little rest out of it.

Still, she knew that if she hadn't been travelling with them, Gray and Juvia would be being serenaded by amorous frogs right about now, and the guilt left her with the unshakeable urge to do something.

Something being singlehandedly repairing the cute relationship that the two of them seemed to be doing their best to sabotage.

"You almost had him," she persisted. "Trust me, I know Gray, and it's a fine line between keeping him interested and pushing him away. He's trying to understand where he fits in with this whole 'new Juvia' thing you have going on. If you back off too far during such a critical moment-"

"Juvia wanted to talk to you, Cana," Juvia interrupted stubbornly.

"Me?" Cana tried to laugh it off. She'd never found it so difficult before. "Look, I know there's no one better to play the love guru in Mira's absence, but this really wasn't the best moment to stop and ask me for advice! You were doing just fine until you ditched him-"

"Juvia is worried about you."

Cana tried to laugh at that as well. She might have got away with it if all her failures hadn't been weighing down the edges of her mouth; smiling was impossible and her laugh too high to be believable.

Sure enough, it only deepened Juvia's concern. "You are Juvia's precious friend," she insisted. "Juvia thinks no less of you, just because you are single."

Ouch. Words of support weren't supposed to hurt that much, not until she was six pints into a night that needed at least ten to take her away from everything.

"Eh, my prince is out there somewhere," she tried to deflect. "I'd be more worried about the way your prince is falling further and further behind in that boat-"

"Juvia is worried," Juvia overrode her, "because Juvia doesn't think this place is a good fit for you. You're amazing, Cana, just not at the things that are important here."

"You don't have to rub it in," she grumbled. Had Juvia always been this perceptive? Was this what happened when she took her laser-focus off winning Gray's heart for half a second? Because if so, Cana had even more of a motive to get them back together as soon as possible. "Besides, I'd be a great matchmaker if you weren't ignoring all my tips-"

"I think you should stay out of this," Juvia murmured. "Juvia and her dear Gray will work things out together. You… will only get in the way."

Cana swallowed.

"Gray and Juvia's love and unity will overcome the trials and get everyone home, including you, and then you can go back to your normal life," Juvia assured her. "But while we're here, then for your own benefit, Juvia thinks you should stop blundering through the world and interfering with other people's stories. You'll do more harm than good."

"Well, I…"

Hadn't she been thinking the same thing earlier, though? Everyone's second choice. An awkward third wheel, a liability to the team, coasting by on the fringes of other people's adventures without ever achieving anything herself.

"You're in the wrong story," Juvia persisted. "You won't find happiness here, and you are only making it more difficult for Juvia and Gray to find their happiness with you tagging along."

"Yeah," Cana conceded emptily. "Yeah, I know. I'll… leave you guys to it, once we've crossed the lake. You can get your happily ever after, and I'll find my own way."

"You are very kind, Cana." Juvia squeezed her hand in gratitude. She must have stopped rowing, and now they drifted amidst a still and silent lake, alone. "But with the forces we are up against, Juvia worries that kindness may not be enough."

"What do you mean?"

"When those bandits attacked," Juvia said, and Cana flinched, suddenly realizing exactly where this was going. Every word hit like one of Juvia's pressurized water blades, blow after blow of her own powerlessness, entirely unnecessary to the scene, the water mage having to cover for her after her botched attempt at being a hero. "You were trying to use your special magic, weren't you? But it didn't work for you."

"Eh, I get terrible stage fright when I'm sober," Cana shrugged. "Give me a few tequilas – or better yet, a pint of that awesome fairy elixir they have here – and I'll be Fairy Glitter-ing the hell out of all the villains we come across."

"Do you really think that will help?" It wasn't a question. It was clear from Juvia's tone that she believed it even less than Cana did. "Remember, Juvia got her magic back by accepting that her dear Gray was worth changing for. Love is the most powerful magic of all. Who do you love, Cana? Who is going to give you the power to use the Blessing of the Fairies?"

No one.

She didn't have that kind of bond with anyone in the guild.

Everyone's second choice.

She opened her mouth, but no words came out. There was no drunken haze to hide behind here. No alcohol-fuelled defiance. Just her own pointlessness, exposed by this world for all to see.

Juvia patted her hand. "That's okay," she reassured her friend. "The right person for you is out there somewhere. But… they're not in here. And if they're not here with us, they can't help you break free, or regain your power. Cana… Juvia thinks that while we're stuck in this world, you should lend that magic to her."

Cana's eyes widened. "You want Fairy Glitter?"

"Just until we're out of here. You don't have the magic to use it, but Juvia does. She can protect Gray, and you, and defeat the enemies we come across. It's the sensible thing to do."

A weak chuckle. "Never thought you'd be lecturing someone on what is and isn't sensible, Juvia."

"Juvia has something to protect. It's too important to leave up to fate. You can't help Gray or even yourself, but Juvia can."

Cana hesitated. Fairy Glitter was the only thing that made her special. She wasn't dominant like Erza or defiant like Lucy or full of such overwhelming feelings as Juvia, beloved by the guild. She hadn't made S-Class, either, but Master Mavis had entrusted her with the guild's sacred magic anyway. Given the lack of any epic victories to her name, it was the only thing she could truly be proud of, an achievement beyond simply being born to the most powerful mage in her guild…

But what was the point, if she couldn't do anything with it?

Juvia had regained her magic. For her, Fairy Glitter wouldn't merely be a symbol, but a weapon on par with anything this fairytale world could muster. That was far more important than her stupid pride.

This wasn't her giving up. It was just… restructuring their team's assets to give them the best overall opportunity. Nobly sacrificing her one advantage for the greater good.

"Okay," she said, rolling up her sleeve before she could change her mind. "I'll lend you Fairy Glitter until we've made it back home. Just promise me you'll stop avoiding Gray and appreciate his changing feelings for you."

"Of course." With a kind smile, Juvia took Cana's hand in her own. "You're a good friend, Cana."

Was she? Cana pondered the question, as the lines of ethereal ink on her forearm began to glow golden. Was she really a good friend, if the best thing she could do was to remove herself from the lives of those she loved? A good person, maybe. But a failure of a friend.

Maybe giving up her magic would go some small way towards making up for that, in her absence. Maybe, when they used it, they'd remember her.

Juvia's arm was glowing too, now. Tendrils of light were inching their way up her skin, forming the pattern that was so familiar and yet totally alien to Cana, who was used to seeing it upside-down. It pulsed in time with her heartbeat. One last thread of connection.

And something else was pulsing too – something at Juvia's throat. It was concealed under the high collar of her dress, layers of blue and white and seafoam, but a light within it resonated with the power Cana was giving away, bright enough to shine through the fabric in a very familiar shape.

The shape of a coiled seashell.

With a horrified cry, Cana tried to pull away, but the magic wouldn't let go. Those bands of gold had come alive around both their arms, draining her power, tethering her to the monster wearing Juvia's face.

Their eyes met. They weren't Juvia's sapphire-blue any more, but yellow and bulbous; not the vast freedom of the ocean but something that lurked in its darkest depths. Cruel joy lit them from within.

"It's mine now," she hissed gleefully.

"Cana! NO!"

Everything seemed to stop.

Everything except the sight of her oldest friend rowing madly towards them in his little wooden rowboat, ploughing through the glassy lake with a fury entirely inappropriate for his vessel.

It was such a bizarre sight that she wanted to laugh, until she realized that he wasn't slowing down.

Gray's boat smashed into theirs. The wooden rowboats had been designed for family outings and cute mid-lake picnics, not aquatic road rage. Gray's boat paused for a split-second and then kept going, oars scraping along wood, crunching through the planks like a starving sea monster.

He rammed straight into the fake Juvia. The magic binding them snapped, and Cana stumbled backwards into the bottom of the boat as the imposter was hurled overboard with a shriek.

Then the front half of the rowboat followed her into the lake. Cana scrambled to her feet as the water rose up to meet her. Her flailing hand met Gray's, and he yanked her into his own boat in the nick of time. She found her feet behind him as he stood at the bow, oar raised like a champion's blade in his right hand, surveying the water with a fierce gaze.

The remnants of Cana's boat were consumed by the lake.

The water rippled, and then was still.

Cana wished she could say the same for her queasy stomach, which, to her dismay, was on the verge of signing up for the Natsu Dragneel School of Boat Travel.

"I think she's fled," Gray decided, before realizing that holding up the oar made it look like he was trying to play whack-a-mole with the ocean, and lowering it hastily.

"I'm starting to see why Prince Eric chose a resurfaced wreck as his battleship," Cana sniggered. "A crusade on a rowboat doesn't have quite the same… pizazz."

"Yeah, well, I can only work with what I have to hand," he grunted. "Think that was her? Ursula?"

"Must have been. She does steal Ariel's voice in the story, and shape-shifts into human form to seduce Prince Eric. Being able to copy the Little Mermaid's appearance is new, though not entirely beyond the realm of possibility. She would have gained nothing in the original story from pretending to be Ariel – the whole deception relied on Eric knowing Ariel and Vanessa were different people, but believing that the wrong one saved him."

"She knew things, though," Gray pondered, staring morosely out across the water. "About mine and Juvia's battle against Invel, and our… relationship struggles."

That was an interesting way of summing up months of trying to dodge Juvia's affections, but Cana decided not to comment. Instead, she reasoned, "Maybe what she said about Juvia telling her everything in exchange for her help wasn't a lie. She could have got Juvia's side of the story in preparation for going undercover. Who knows how magic works in this world, anyway? Perhaps she's just that powerful."

Gray grunted. "Guess this means we can't look forward to getting our magic back through some dramatic act of true love, then." Strangely, he didn't seem too put out by this fact. "Ursula had magic because she was a sea-witch all along, and everything she said about it coming back to her was to throw us off the scent."

"Yeah." Cana glanced down at her arm. Fairy Glitter's tattoo was back where it belonged. It no longer shone with the gold light of magic, but that didn't seem to matter as much now. It wasn't a failing on her part. She and her friends, they were all in the same boat. Quite literally, in fact.

Gray had noticed her glance. A little smirk touched his face. "I can't believe you were going to give Fairy Glitter to Ursula."

"I can't believe you were falling in love with her!" she shot back at once, and was gratified to see a flush igniting across his cheeks as if he'd swallowed one of Natsu's fireballs.

"I was not."

"Yeah, right," she snorted. "I saw the look on your face when she said she would rather ride with me."

"Yeah, well, she uses hypnosis against Eric in the film, doesn't she? I was probably under her spell!"

"A poor hapless victim of her evil magic?" Cana teased.

Flustered, he argued, "Yes! I mean- I'm not hapless! I broke out of it, didn't I?"

"Oh, I suppose. Out of interest, how did you break the spell?"

"I just…" He glanced away. "I realized that it wasn't what I wanted."

"Oh?"

"I don't want a romantic relationship with Juvia, but I also don't want her to force herself to become someone I would want a romantic relationship with, at the expense of her own self," he muttered. That was surprisingly sentimental of him, so she wasn't entirely surprised when he added, "Repeat one word of that to anyone, and you're dead. No, worse – I'll get you banned from Fairy Tail's bar!"

She let out an easy laugh. "No worries there. If anyone asks, we'll say we rescued ourselves from Shan Yu like the badass team we are, and had an entirely uneventful journey across the lake. You get me?"

"Ah, it's one of those adventures." Gray nodded sagely. "Tales that shall never be told as long as we both shall live, there to join the esteemed company of the Don't Brew Vodka In A Bathroom Incident and the Didn't The Name Of The Hotel Give It Away When You Were Booking It? Misunderstanding."

An unladylike snort escaped Cana's lips. "Don't forget the Mysterious Case of the Haunted Broom Closet."

"Ugh, Cana, I did not want that image back in my head, thanks a lot!" He scowled at her, and she laughed again, their almost-disaster on the lake already safe amongst the ranks of traumatic yet fond memories.

"Besides," she pointed out, "I didn't think they were never to be told. Only that they were being kept as blackmail material should one of us ever defect to a rival guild. Or maybe prompts for my speech at your wedding."

"Well, that's you off the guest list," he said with feeling. "Not that there's a risk of any weddings happening any time soon. Guess we're both back to square one when it comes to finding true love."

"Yeah," Cana agreed. It was a dismaying thought, and yet she felt lighter than she had since Shan Yu had first tied her up. "I guess we are."

A/N: So, not a surprising ending to this string of events. But it is something I wanted to address in this story. I tend to avoid Gruvia stories, but where I do read them, they tend to go down the route of Juvia making an effort to dial it down and Gray coming to realize, when she backs off a bit, that he actually does like her romantically. They get together, and it's a much healthier relationship than canon ever allows. There's nothing wrong with that. If I was going for canon pairings in this fic, I'd probably have taken the same approach.

But there are no canon pairings here. And so, as a few people guessed, I wanted to show that even that approach wasn't an option. When presented with a 'perfect version' of Juvia, Gray was pleasantly surprised at first, but came to realize that that wasn't what he wanted, because it meant giving up her fun and enthusiastic self. He doesn't want her to change for him - doesn't want her to lose her zest for life. He'd rather she stays as she is, bringing craziness to the guild's daily life as his friend, than loses all that to become his perfect girlfriend. And now that Gray is completely past that, he can start moving forward.

(The fact that Cana's issues have been quietly swept back under the rug with the way this encounter ended is another matter...) ~CS