Episode 1

Rob: "I've never been under control in this relationship and my wife needs to understand that."

I-

Godwin: I graduated with a phD and we are smart guys.

Wait...since when you were guys macho/booksmart men back in Season 10?

Kellie & Jamie don't know how to drive.

Jamie: Turn it on Kellie!

Kellie: I don't noooo how to turn it onnnnn

This season has 12 teams (first time since Season 4)

The intro music is VERY poorly put together.

Lyn & Karlyn and Tom & Terry are totally out of sync to the music. I be pissed if I was them.

Bilal & Sa'eed are getting quite a lot of screen time.

Lyn: People in China like us, because of the movie Forrest Gump.

No comment.

Dustin & Kandice and David & Marry arrive at the airport together.

Mary: You guys are beautiful!

Oh Mary.

Rob & Kim nearly get into a fight about rental cars. This is only the beginning.

Overly done cheery music plays as the teams get their tickets.

Erwin & Godwin have water guns and spray Dustin & Kandice with them.

WTF

James: Arrest them!

lol

Dustin & Kandice get lost for 45 minutes trying to find the Gold House.

lol

Dustin: Kellie & Jamie and Tom & Terry passed us, even though we were on the first flight. We worked so hard to be ahead of them!

I don't know what to say.

Bilal & Sa'eed are the last to arrive and are eliminated.

James looks 6 foot 3 and everyone else look like manlet/womanlets.

Vipul & Arti get lost.

Rob & Kimberly almost get into another fight.

Tyler & James and Peter & Sarah kick everyone's butt at the detour.

Lyn: Peter micromanages so much, I swear.

Lyn's full name is Lynette.

Kim: Babe, I need you to listen to me!

...

Duke & Lauren's relationship is improving.

Lyn: Climb up that wall! It can't be worse than child birth!

lol

Vipul & Arti are the last to arrive and are eliminated.

End episode.

Episode 9

Dustin: We sweat, we cry, we work, and we scream and fight to be here!

Okay.

Rob: Lyn and Karlyn are so screwed. They won't make this flight.

For once? Rob actually gives a decent confessional.

Everyone gets on the flight to Finland. Yay.

Lyn: Dustin and Kandice race out of the airport, with their boobs hanging out, to catch the taxi driver's attention.

lol

Everyone meets their loved ones via an AOL message.

To Finland.

Erwin & Godwin are last to grab a taxi.

Detour

Lyn: One team member must carry the other!

Karlyn: Hell no, the other one.

lol

Tyler gives James a piggyback ride.

James: Go! Go!

Tyler looks pissed.

Rob: I didn't think I would be able to carry you.

Kim: Why? You think I'm fat.

OMG. The confessionals for them are getting worse and worse.

Tyler: The blondes are following us! I don't trust them!

Thank you for pointing out the obvious Tyler. There was no such, rivalry or even friendship between the two teams. EV4R.

Fire forged enemies Tyler & James and Dustin & Kandice work together for a little bit.

Okay no they don't.

Kandice: Grab a Pokey thing.

POKEEMOONNNNNN

Rob: KIMMMM! GET OVER HERE!

That was a solid 7/10 Scorpion impression.

Keep Racing. Episode ends in a cliffhanger. Nobody's eliminated.

Episode 10

Everyone is going to Kiev, Ukraine and die.

lol no they won't lol

lol this aired in 2006 lol

Dustin: We have a love-hate relationship with the boys.

Yawn inducing confessional Dustin.

GOOD JOB KIM!

Inside voices please Rob.

Dustin: Chernobyl? Is that the place where the atomic bomb went off?

...

Rob: Chernobyl is in Russia, right?

...

Kandice: There's the boys!

Tyler: There's the blondes!

NO WAIIII

Ukraine's colors of blue and yellow.

The teams get to drive tanks.

Tyler: James is driving that tank like a girl!

Tyler's Sexist Count: 1

Rob has really bad tattoos. Gross.

Lyn and Karlyn and Edwin and Godwin get lost for 20 minutes.

The girls had enough of the brothers and finally go off on their own.

THANK YOU.

I literally did not understand a single word Dustin & Kandice said in their rap song.

I wonder who's getting eliminated...

Come on. You have to know.

Phil: No female team has EVER won The Amazing Race.

Thank you for spoiling the viewers for the past 9 seasons Phil.

Edwin & Godwin are eliminated.

Episode 11

Rob: The blondes race with arrogance and I don't like it.

I-

Dustin & Kandice miss their connection flight.

Both in unison, beg the ticket counter lady on.

She denies the request.

Lyn & Karlyn are awesome.

Lyn & Karlyn are so much fun.

Extreme tension as all four teams race to the yield.

...

And it's ruined, as all four teams are suddenly equalized at the next roadblock.

Dustin & Kandice yield Lyn & Karlyn.

Rob & Kimberly have a broken car again.

Lyn: If you have a broken car, maybe it's you and not the car!

All four teams, get lost, back and forth through the desert.

Tyler & James: YEAAAAH YEAHHHH!

Mordecai & Rigby would rival with them, if this was 2010.

Dustin & Kandice are the last to show up but, it's non-elimination.

Episode 12

I can only hear this episode through one speaker.

Yay.

Casablanca is the name of an actual city in Morrocco.

Dustin: Rob & Kim are following us!

Kim: They have the clue!

Rob: No, they don't!

Kim: Do you guys, already have the clue?

Rob: Don't ask them!

Kim: They're leaving!

Kandice: Yes, it's back THAT WAY!

Rob completely ignores Kandice and gets directly in the face of Dustin & Kandice's taxi driver.

Rob: WHERE IS IT!? (the taxi driver gives a crazed look)

LMAO

Rob: BABE GRIND THE MEAT!

KIM: BABE STOP YELLING AT ME!

OMG

Lyn & Karlyn fight too.

Rob & Kim's PURE CRINGE Tomato fight.

Dustin & Kandice are last and eliminated.

Final episode let's go.

Episode 13 (Finale)

All three teams share EXTREMELY boring confessionals.

We deserve to be in the Final 3 and we'll be the winners over the other two teams blah blah blah.

I feel bad for people working at the ticket counters at 4 AM at the airports.

Rob & Kim get ahead of the other two teams.

Tyler & James actually get into a fight with each other.

All three teams on three different flights to the Eiffel Tower.

iZ A TAHXI FASTER THAN TRAIN?

Rob & Kim and Tyler & James take a train ride there. Lyn & Karlyn hop for a taxi.

Anyone's game.

Tension builds. 10/10 editing skills.

Lyn & Karlyn beat everyone else to the Eiffel Tower. Wow.

I'm surprised how Kim has never yelled at anybody but, Rob this entire season.

All three teams are equalized again and take a train out of the city.

Skydive roadblock completed. All three teams successfully complete with no problem.

All three are about to fly to New York City.

Final destination city.

Lyn: We have sacrificed SO MUCH to NOT win the one million dollars.

Tyler: We go to New York City every year. We got this.

Rob: I WANTED TO SKYDIVE SOOOOOO BAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDD GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Kim: Are you going to get over it?

Rob: NOOOO!

OMG.

Lyn & Karlyn go to a different airport unlike Rob & Kim and Tyler & James.

Gilmon from Digimon (seriously) is at the ticket counter for Rob & Kim and Tyler & James.

They both get on a flight to New York City.

Lyn & Karlyn are left stranded there. They look pissed. Don't blame them.

Epic car chase through New York to St. Bails's Academy. The finish line.

Here we go.

Tyler & James win.

The season ends.