Finally got this monster of a chapter finished! It's over 12k words so feel free to eat it up! I'm excited to share this chapter and move on to the next one where we will finally reach Central! Enjoy!
Chapter warnings: Just an egregious amount of fluff/hurt/comfort. :')
"I could get used to this," I remarked with a blissful sigh, soaking in the countryside atmosphere. It had already been a couple of days since we first arrived, and things were going quite well. I hadn't seen much of Winry or her grandmother, but that was to be expected when you had to rebuild two limbs out of automail from scratch. I couldn't even imagine the amount of work it took to pull that off. Judging by the fact that the two women were often nowhere to be seen, it had to be a lot of work. As for the rest of us, most of the week was spent lazing around, playing card games, and whatever else we could find to entertain ourselves while the Rockbell women worked tirelessly inside their respective rooms. Edward specifically, however, had been a bit of a nuisance, to say the least. I caught him stalking Winry's door on multiple occasions trying to get an update on her progress. To say I had to practically babysit him was becoming an understatement.
After another successful event of prying Edward away from Winry's room to leave her to her work, we settled on spending our time out on the front lawn, something that was becoming the norm for our little vacation.
"I'm glad somebody's enjoying themselves," Edward griped from my side, splayed wide over the grass as though he owned it. I rolled my eyes with an amused snort.
"I know how to relax. Honestly Ed you're so tense. Just enjoy the peace around you. You'd think you liked chaos or something." I teased, finding myself somewhat satisfied with the blonde's expressive reaction.
"It's not chaos I like, It's having something to do. Knowing that the library's back in Central waiting for us makes me fidgety," He groaned, wiggling in his spot and I couldn't help but laugh. He was good at making me laugh. Both him and Al were. I was glad I still had that to hold onto.
"Why don't you go visit mom?" Alphonse said suddenly, cutting the quiet air like a knife through soft butter.
"You mean visit her grave," Edward said sullenly, sitting up with a little difficulty as he grew quiet for a moment. 'Good mood gone…'
"Go see her, I'll stay here." Alphonse continued gently at seeing his brother's demeanor change. I sat up slowly as well, silently observing the two of them for a moment as Edward got to his feet. The slight weight growing heavy in the air made me want to melt into the ground. If only it were possible… I had expected Edward to disappear, but instead, he stood there stiffly, slowly turning his gaze over to me from above. He looked at me, considering and I wondered if he could feel my discomfort. 'What did I do now?'
"Would you like to come with?" He asked, tone smooth as if it hadn't just taken him several uncomfortable minutes to say it. My eyes grew wide as I dumbly looked up at him surprised.
"What?" I questioned, a bit unsure if I had heard him correctly. 'Is he asking what I think he's asking?' He kept his expression relaxed as he clarified.
"Would you like to come with me? You could tag along if you want." The sentence was delivered rather calmly and I found myself a bit lost for words. 'Wasn't it just days ago he couldn't open up to me about Nina, now he was inviting me to visit his mother's grave ?' I reiterate: Conundrum.
My heart floored in my chest at the uncertainty battling within me, and I glanced over at Alphonse as I considered how to answer.
"You…You'd share something like that with me..?" I asked slowly, apprehensive of how to go about the situation. 'And to think you chewed him out a couple of days ago,' Edward rocked on his heels as he glanced elsewhere.
"Well, it's just her grave, it's not like she's really there," Immediately I could feel a pang of something that felt like hurt flitter through the air, and my nose drew my attention to Alphonse. The armor clanked slightly as his helmet aimed toward the ground but was otherwise silent. Edward's rather cold remark left a somewhat bad taste in my mouth, but I didn't comment as the teen regarded me again.
"But, It could be nice to visit anyway. It's up to you." He finished, seeming to notice the growing thickness in the air, but avoiding to bring attention to it. I finagled my way to my feet, my balance being disrupted by the inability to use my right arm, and I gave him a small smile as I came to stand beside him.
"Well, in that case, I'd love to," I responded simply, and the blonde returned the smile with an even smaller one, giving his brother one last parting glance before making his way up the porch steps to alert Winry and her grandmother of his coming absence. I watched him as he left before slowly turning my gaze over to Alphonse who remained deathly quiet. My heart ached with an icky discomfort I hadn't had the displeasure to experience in quite some time. Slowly, I stepped up to his crate, resting a gentle hand on the extended piece of metal covered in cloth where his shoulder should have been. Where it would be, had it not been for him.
"You okay?" I prompted, leaning over slightly in an attempt to catch his eye. The armor sighed, before swiveling his helmet to look up at me.
"Yeah," He answered easily, but I wasn't convinced. I paused for a moment, waiting to see if he'd continue before the armor inevitably caved.
"Brother refuses to believe there's anything after this life, I'm not so sure." He began, and I listened quietly as he continued, watching as his eyes shifted elsewhere, observing the open plains surrounding us. "Logically, I know she's not here anymore…But…Sometimes it's nice to pretend. I know better than to wish for her to come back…but isn't it reasonable to hope there's more? That, she's not just… gone?'
I hardly ever thought about what lay beyond death. In the lab, we were taught that life was the only state of being. Once death had come, that was the end of it, and neither alchemist nor average man could ever return. It was a sin to even try. Both Edward and Alphonse had been assured of that. To see that he still clung to hope that this wasn't all there was…well, it also made me wonder… 'What would become of us when we died? Was it wrong to wish for more?'
I shook my head softly, eyes wandering the rolling hills in the distance as I inhaled the fresh air through my nose.
"I don't think that's unreasonable Al. I suppose everyone has their own way of seeing things. If believing there's another existence beyond this one, where your mom is at peace brings you comfort, then I see nothing wrong with that." I said, regarding the boy with a smile. Alphonse seemed to calm at that, nodding lightly as he returned his gaze to me.
"Thanks, Em,"
"No problem," A light smack of the door rang through the quiet air as Edward returned from inside the house, smoothly stepping down the porch steps as he made his way back toward us. He was once again sporting his red coat over a black tank top, and I found myself rolling my eyes. 'Don't even know why I keep expecting him to dress otherwise.'
"Ready to go?" He asked, stuffing his hand into his pocket and I nodded simply.
"Whenever you are,"
"Good. Let's go then." He pivoted on his heel and made his way down the property path without another word, and I waved over at Alphonse as I staggered to keep up. I couldn't help but shake my head at him. "Forget what I said about him not having any emotions, it's more like he's got a whirlwind of them.'
It seemed one moment he was vigilant in keeping his outward reactions rather controlled, like a brick wall, then the next he was flopping from one mood to the next. It made my head spin. And what's with the sudden desire to invite me to something so personal? Sure, it's not like he was offering his bleeding heart up for me to take or blowing the metaphorical closet of skeletons wide open so to speak. Even so, I was aware of people's protective nature over such things. People had a way of being selective about sharing sacred things with others. Wasn't this one of those? Especially considering who he was related to. This was Edward and Alphonse's mother, surely he'd be a bit more apprehensive to visit her under the prying eyes of just anyone…right?
Barking from below us drew my attention to Den as the Rockbell family pet caught up with us, striding up beside Edward with ease. The dog's tail whipped back and forth happily from behind her without a care as the boy regarded the animal with a smile.
"We're taking the dog?" I asked a little incredulous about the pet's attendance at our outing and Edward snorted at me.
"Of course, she is the best guard dog in Resembool after all," He stated as if that was a well-known fact, and I felt incredibly left out of the loop. I quirked a brow at the mutt, but her eyes were locked on the copious bugs and other wild smells offered up by the nature around us as we continued to walk alongside one another. The dog followed her nose's lead and I was vaguely reminded of simpler times when I too wandered around using my nose as a guide in the days following my escape from the lab.
"Besides,-" Edward continued, sensing my growing skepticism. "Granny asked me to take her. Something about walking her." He shrugged his shoulders as if he wasn't too convinced himself, but was accepting of it regardless. I decided I might as well follow along, as it wasn't really much trouble to include her. Den continued to sniff and yip as she busied herself ahead of us along the trail and I found my mind drifting as we walked.
It had hardly ever come up; the topic of Alphonse and Edward's conflicting views of death and the idea of an afterlife. I'd never thought to ask, and they'd simply never offered their opinions. Beyond Edward's usual tangent of his distaste for religion as a whole, I didn't get the chance to ask about their opposing outlooks. Frankly, I had no idea they were any different. Most of the time, through my observations, I'd noticed Alphonse was quite adaptable in his views. He was capable of changing them with substantial evidence and would consider opposing points of view to guide his decisions. Edward was harder to convince. Very strong in his morals, he had a tendency to set his mind in one way…and then never question it again. Alphonse was agreeable in most instances when it came to his brother, choosing to keep his opinions minimal as it was overshadowed by Edward's much more outward projection of his thoughts…When it came to arguments he could win anyway.
'I never really analyzed them like that until now.' It seemed I was still surprising even myself.
"What?" Edward asked suddenly, breaking me from my thoughts and I peered over at him as he glanced at me from my side.
"Huh? Sorry, what did you say?" I asked a little belatedly as my mind caught up to the conversation, previous thoughts abandoned. He raised a brow at me.
"You looked a little distracted, I figured you were thinking about something and thought I'd ask." He offered simply and I smiled a little at myself.
"Oh, well yeah I was thinking about something…" I trailed off, unsure if I should clue him in.
"What would that be?" He inquired, prying me to answer. I wasn't sure if it was out of polite conversation, or if he genuinely wanted to know. I figured if I ever wanted to give Edward the chance to open up, I might as well open the door for him to do so.
"It seems you and Al have different views when it comes to death. Why is that?" I asked, and Edward shrugged in response.
"Al likes to see things through a different lens than I do. It's easier for him that way." He offered and I squinted at him suspiciously.
"Are you insinuating that Al actively chooses to see differently than you?"
"More like wishful thinking if anything. I'm a lot more pessimistic than Al is. It's impossible for me to believe anything if there's any sort of doubt behind it. Unless it's irrevocably proven, I'll always take it with a grain of salt." He supplied and I quirked a disbelieving brow at him.
"So now you're saying Al is gullible? How can you say that about your own brother?"
"I say that because he's my brother. No one understands him more than me. At the end of the day, Al's still just a kid." Edward said, giving me a sideways glance. My brows furrowed at the look.
"Don't forget Ed, you're a kid too. We all are." Edward didn't answer, instead offering silence as he returned his gaze toward the path as we walked. I tried to keep pace with him as the air grew uncomfortably quiet, dropping my eyes to the ground in favor of looking anywhere but him. We remained like that for some time, making our way through the dirt road before stopping by a little flower cart while Edward talked for a moment with the vendor. They politely took up a conversation, something about the weather and how long it had been since the two saw each other last before Edward purchased a bouquet and the two of us were on our way again.
I was content to stay out of the way as a few more passersby greeted him and every time he smiled politely and made small talk before moving on like it was just an ordinary day. It was admittedly strange. I was used to Edward being rather short with people, not always outwardly rude, just not much for chatting with every person he saw. But here…it was different somehow.
Everyone seemed to know everyone, and Edward was no exception. I wondered if everything had gone differently, and Edward and his brother had never committed human transmutation if he would always be like this…Or even more, would he stay here? Never to be anything more than some farm boy or a small-town nobody? The famous Fullmetal Alchemist would probably cease to exist entirely, and I never would have met him or Alphonse. The thought did make me consider him a little more closely.
And then, we arrived.
Cemetery the sign read over the large metal arch standing at the entry of the sacred ground. Edward strode across the entrance without hesitation, boots softly treading the grass toward his destination. My eyes locked with the ground below me. The veil between the land of the living, and the holy grounds of those who were at rest. I needed to pay my respects, so I stepped forward carefully, following behind apprehensive to step in the wrong place. I'd never been in a cemetery before, I certainly didn't know what kind of etiquette was expected in a place like this, so, I'd try to step lightly.
I stopped a few paces away as I peered at Edward's back when he stopped suddenly. He stood over a tombstone that seemed no more remarkable than its neighbors, standing stiffly erected from the ground. It was covered in a faint grime from years of enduring harsh weather and minor neglect. He was quiet for a moment as he regarded the stone.
"Hey, mom." His voice was soft as he stooped down, offering the bouquet of flowers previously handled with care in his remaining hand to the tombstone, laying it on the smooth stone slab over the plot of grass beneath it. He stilled as he kneeled there, as if silently praying, or talking to her in an unspoken language only they could understand. I waited quietly, apprehensive to approach the gravestone out of fear of intruding. After a moment of undisturbed silence, Edward rose from the ground, but even still he remained rooted at the base of the grave, back turned from me.
"Even though I'm firm in the belief there's nothing out there after we die, I still find myself childishly talking to her, as if she could actually hear me." He laughed halfheartedly at himself, voice filled with longing.
"I know she's not here, and she'll never come back, this assured me of that fact." He gripped the emptiness of his shoulder, where the flesh of his right arm should have been, and the wind billowed the empty coat sleeve as if to cement that fact.
"But…I don't know…maybe Al has a point…" He didn't clarify after that, leaving the rest unsaid as bits of leaves and debris kicked up with the gentle breeze flitting past us. I stepped up beside him to regard the tombstone below us.
Trisha Elric, 1878 - 1904.
Cherished Wife, Mother, Daughter, and Friend.
My heart felt like it was gonna shrivel into nothing. 'How fucking sad…' Considering the math, they were incredibly young when their mother passed away. They were practically babies. They never went into great detail about their past, and until recently, I tried to refrain from prying. Now, I could see why they weren't too keen on sharing. Throughout their lives, they've been continuously reminded of their trauma, and every new meeting cemented the ugly truths they already knew. I felt ashamed to contribute to that, and yet, I realized something at that moment.
Whether or not Edward had intended to or not, bringing me here gave me a bit more insight into who he truly was, and for that, I couldn't fault him. Despite his many flaws, he really did have a heart of Fullmetal. 'Bah ha ha, that was a silly pun wasn't it?' I chuckled to myself to which Edward raised a brow at me confused.
"What's so funny?" I laughed more at his flustered response and merely shook my head.
"Nothing, nothing. Just…thank you." I offered instead and the blonde flushed at me as he sputtered.
"F-for what?" I simply smiled at him.
"For bringing me here, and letting me meet her. I appreciate you sharing this with me." I replied in kind and the blonde's face crept with red as he averted his eyes anywhere but me.
"Don't start getting mushy on me…" He groaned, trying to rid himself of the rising heat across his face and I rolled my eyes. 'Boys…"
"Come on, we better get back," I drawled with an amused laugh as Den and I made our way back toward the dirt road, not taking the time to look back to see if he was following. I knew he'd catch up.
The walk back was a lot less constrained. The two of us were able to walk in comfortable silence as I took up sightseeing, making note of the beautiful scenery as the clouds rolled in and the calling card of sunset stretched over the horizon. 'It would be dark soon.' I thought to myself, and I couldn't help my rising excitement. Alphonse and I had started stargazing every night since we arrived in Resembool, and I found myself greatly looking forward to it.
As we reached the house, I noticed Alphonse was no longer out front, his crate missing. "Maybe the Major moved him?' I thought it odd, but not out of the ordinary, and I kept the concern to myself, stepping up the stairs onto the porch with ease. I opened the door and swept to the side, gesturing for Edward to go ahead of me. He gave me a confused look but shook his head with a smile as he just went with it, stepping into the house before me and I smiled in turn. 'What? Nothing wrong with a nice gesture every once in a while,"
I swept into the house after him, stopping abruptly when my eyes landed on Winry just as she stepped into the room as well.
"Oh, there you are, I was wondering when you two were gonna get back," She smiled warmly at the two of us as she made her way further into the room, dusting her hands clean of something I couldn't discern.
"Yeah, we were just out for a bit." Edward supplied easily, heading toward the stairs when Winry stopped him with a lift of her head in his direction.
"Oh hey wait, I need you for a minute Ed. I need to take measurements of your shoulder guard again." She said catching him before he could slink away. Edward halted momentarily, one foot grazing the bottom step before he swung his head around to face Winry.
"What the hell for? You took them two days ago," Edward groaned but remained rooted at the bottom of the stairs as he tried to brush her off. She persisted.
"Stop whining and sit down, it will only take a minute," She huffed and the blonde sighed exasperated, but caved regardless, trudging over to the couch along the far wall before plunking down onto it dramatically. Winry ignored his senseless grumbling as she fished out a white stretch of tape from her pocket and began aligning it across his metal shoulder port, meticulously calculating numbers in her head as she tried to discern how to make up for the caved in piece of metal under her fingertips. I shuffled from my spot by the door awkwardly for a moment as I considered how to busy myself. Surely I wasn't needed, so carefully, I slinked away back out the front door we'd come in through, and wound up on the front lawn once again.
I rested on my back in the sun-bathed grass, closing my eyes as I breathed in the mountainous air around me. A little minute to myself wouldn't hurt, right?
I awoke slowly sometime later, the sun beginning to hide away amongst the distant mountains, and I blinked the tiredness from my eyes clear as I considered my surroundings.
'I'm…still outside? Did I fall asleep? How come no one woke me up?' I sat up slowly, realizing startlingly that my skin felt rather tender and I hissed as I examined myself.
'My skin feels like paper…' I realized then, that I had in fact, gotten a sunburn.
"Damn pale skin, I burn quicker than a stupid piece of toast," I grumbled bitterly as I maneuvered myself back onto my feet, making a note of the rather quiet air about the property.
'I was really out here for a couple of hours all by myself?' I shook my head. 'Thank god I didn't get kidnapped or some shit.' I yawned into my palm as sleep struggled to release its grip on me, slowly making my way up the porch steps and inside the family home. It was quiet, but the lights were on.
'It was only sunset, surely everyone didn't go to bed right?' The familiar smells and sounds of cooking could be heard from the kitchen in the adjacent room and my heart eased somewhat. 'Well, that answers that at least,'
'Where are the boys?' I turned my attention toward the staircase, the long stretch of steps leading up to the second floor seemed to be the next course of action.
I made my way up the stairs, skipping a few along the way simply for the fun of it, smiling softly as I did so. 'Sometimes you just gotta enjoy the little things, right?' I probably shouldn't have been doing so, as my arm made my balance sloppier than usual, but I didn't care, the opportunity arose and I took it. My mood began to lift as I continued to ascend the steps, thinking of how funny it was going to be to explain where I'd been all this time. That was until I saw the Major.
Armstrong stood close to the bedroom door down the hallway, quietly looking in through the crack and I quirked a brow at him 'What is he doing?' Slowly, I approached him from his side, keeping my voice low as I regarded him.
"Major? What are you doing?' I hissed and the large man didn't answer, his blue eyes trained on the figures inside the room.
"I think there's something wrong with me," A small voice spoke from beyond the wall and my breath stilled. 'Alphonse?' I craned my neck past the Major to get a look inside the bedroom. Alphonse sat on one of the various beds along the wall, the moon bathing his armor in a soft almost ethereal glow from outside the adjacent window. He wasn't alone. Edward accompanied him from the opposite bed, his back toward us as the two sat there, quiet for a moment. 'What…?'
"Listen, Al, there's something I've been meaning to ask you…" Edward started, head bowed slightly as his voice trembled momentarily. "I guess I've been too afraid of what you're reaction might be…" Guilt trickled from his body like a rolling fog and it stung my nose as I breathed it in. 'I shouldn't be listening to this. This is wrong.' I looked up at the Major from my side. The man was stone-cold still as he stared completely unwavering while the conversation continued from beyond the wall. 'Why is he just standing there? Should I do something?'
"What?" Alphonse prompted, his head clanking with a swivel toward his brother as he set his eyes upon him. Edward stiffened as he continued to hesitate.
"Damnit, It's just…" He trailed off, guilt and shame continuing to fester and I felt my own heart pick up at the growing drama. 'I should leave. I shouldn't be listening to this.' I felt ashamed of myself for my curiosity, but what else could I do really?
"Tell me," Alphonse prodded, like a child growing weary of their parent's silence. I could sense his soul yearning for Edward to confess, to come clean about whatever it was he was holding back. A sick part of me was feeling the same. Edward sighed, his emotions washing away as quickly as they came, that wall returning once again.
"It's nothing, forget about it," He responded, and I felt once again completely cut off from him. 'Ed…'
"Brother, tell me," Alphonse pleaded, but nothing more could be said as the Major broke free from his silence, seemingly springing to life as he pushed through the door, bursting into the room with all his exuberance as he approached the boys. I gaped at him from behind.
"Gentlemen, look up at the sky. Regard the moonlight with its gentle glow and the stars as they twinkle in the twilight like a million shimmering jewels," He sang, resting his large hands on their respective shoulders as he regaled them with his poem. It was complete nonsense and I couldn't even keep up after the first half. I leaned against the frame of the door smoothly, staying quiet as I observed the three of them from my place at the entrance. I'd let the Major take this one, after all, I couldn't stop him if I tried.
"The night-filled sky has a concert of constellations you cannot witness in the light of the City. You've got a truly beautiful view here in this little town of Resembool. In exchange for the simplicity of the countryside, you are gifted with sights many could not obtain anywhere else. You can lose yourself in the stars." The sparkling man's heart rang with gentleness and sincerity as he continued and I was actually quite surprised by him.
He may not have made a whole lot of sense, and his … flair was definitely something to get adjusted to, but even so, he seemed to understand just what to say and he spoke of something that seemed to resonate with the boys. The two smiled at each other, the air seeming to settle around them as the previous conversation was forgotten. The man had a talent for de-escalating things, and I had to admire that. Whether or not he should have gotten involved would be left up for debate. I supposed it could be let go for now.
"Years ago, we used to look up at the stars every night, didn't we Al?" Edward regarded his brother with a smile, all tension previously washed away and the armor nodded in kind.
"Yeah, and dream,"
"Alright, are you ready?" Winry asked, pulling away from the newly transfixed shoulder dock previously installed on Edward earlier that morning. Giving him time to prepare, he had a few hours of sitting around until Winry and her grandmother collected all the necessary tools and equipment needed to dock his new arm and leg into their respective ports. Edward looked pale as he sat back on the chair in the middle of the room he was propped up on.
"Nope," Edward sucked on his teeth, seemingly dreading the approaching operation and the girl beside him adjusted her glove with a roll of her eyes.
"Oh come on, it won't be that bad," She commented, amused at his weary expression.
"Oh yeah, 'cause it's only connecting my nerves to a literal system of nuts and bolts. No pain at all." Edward groaned, his sarcasm thick as he trailed his eyes anywhere but her, his nerves eating at him. I could tell he was nervous, his brow was collecting with sweat and I could practically smell the dread from here. If Edward was getting this worked up before anything really happened, I wondered what the actual connection of his limbs really felt like. It had to be awful.
I sat back further into the couch beside Alphonse as I continued to quietly observe. The Major sat silently on Alphonse's other side, the three of us remaining quiet as we tried to stay out of the way. I hadn't planned on sitting in during the operation, but I felt it might be comforting if I showed my support, and I couldn't deny I was immensely curious.
Since I first met Edward I had been completely enraptured by his automail, over the coming weeks of spending time with him, I tried my best not to hound him on how it worked, but admittedly it was becoming increasingly hard not to.
Seeing the automail at its barest form as I did now, I felt in complete awe as my eyes trailed the intricate metal appendage. Metal pistons and bearings stood nakedly out in the open as the inner workings of the metal limbs were carefully adjusted to Edward's ports, accompanied by two long L-shaped bars that stuck out oddly from the rest of the limbs. 'Winry mentioned they were called something… torque wrench….lug wrench?' The names of the tools went completely over my head, but I found myself fascinated nonetheless. And of course, I wasn't the only one.
"Honestly Ed, why go through all this trouble for flesh limbs when you've got this automail instead? You've got the smell of oil, the stretch of synthetic muscles, the gearing of metal bearings, it's truly a work of art." Winry hummed as she sang praises for the steal metal work she was so enamored with. Edward rolled his eyes with a snort.
"You're such a machine junky." He drawled, drawing attention to the girl's apparent obsession with the workmanship. She steamed at him.
"You're such an alchemy freak!" She shot back and the three of us deadpanned. The two sure argued a lot, the whole family did. I supposed it wasn't all too different from how the three of us were. Edward and I had an affinity for getting on each other's nerves, frequently egging each other on in anything we could make a challenge out of. Alphonse was a lot more willing to let things be, but every once in a while, he'd put up a verbal match or two with his brother. I on the other hand hardly ever argued with him, the armor simply being too agreeable for me to ever have an issue. Until recently I hadn't even considered if me and Al ever could get into a fight. ' What would we even fight about?'
"Alright you two, get ready," Pinako announced as she gripped ahold of the L-shaped tool jutting out from Edwards's thigh, waiting for Winry to do the same. Winry took ahold of the identical tool cranked at Edward's shoulder and the two gave each other hard looks with tight lips as they prepared.
"One,"
"Two,"
"Three!" The two women twisted their respective tools with a hard yank, securing the metal appendages to their new housing firmly. Edward grit his teeth as he groaned painfully, throwing his head back as he swallowed down a pained yelp. I physically flinched as I watched. I couldn't even begin to imagine what that must feel like, flesh and bone meeting lifeless metal. ' That's no way to live,' I could only watch on uselessly from the side. Pinako paled as her eyes shot up toward the three of us urgently.
"You three get up, we're gonna move him right there. Quickly!" She barked and a zing of ice shot through my blood as I jumped to my feet, quick to shuffle out of the way as the Major assisted in moving Alphonse off of the couch while Winry and her grandmother prepared Edward for transfer.
Pulling the L wrenches free from their nuts located on the sides of his automail, Winry cursed as her wrench got stuck momentarily, yanking harder than she intended when the tool broke free with a snap, jostling Edward's shoulder in its wake.
"Shit, Sorry Ed," She apologized as she set the tool down, eyes darting over Edward's scrunched-up expression as the pain from the sudden movement undoubtedly affected him.
Edward mumbled incoherently in response, his lucidity seeming to slip as the pain overwhelmed him. My heart picked up as I looked him over. 'Was it really that bad? Why am I so afraid all of a sudden?'
My stomach seemed to drop out of nowhere as I continued to observe, unable to tear my eyes away as Armstrong came to Winry's side, aiding in lifting Edward off the chair and toward the adjacent furniture. The boy's groaning tapered into quiet moans as he was settled onto the couch, his limps carefully set down beside him while Winry and her grandmother worked quickly to stabilize him and finish putting together the metal pieces of his exposed automail. I pressed myself against the wall as I continued to shuffle away from everything. "He never mentioned it was this bad…' I felt awful for him, and I worried for his sake. I mentally berated myself. ' For hell's sake Em, knock it off…he's gonna be fine, stop worrying…'
"You alright?" A strong voice carried from somewhere above me and I focused my eyes up toward the Major who stood in front of me, his calming demeanor washing over me. I startlingly realized all eyes were on me as the room grew painfully still and I paled as my heart battered inside my chest. 'Everyone's looking at you.'
"Y-Yep, just fine." I managed out, trying my best to stop my face from showing any sign of the anxiety that raged inside me. The man looked me over, giving me a considering look before retreating to my side, choosing not to pry and I was grateful. I exhaled slowly as I tried to calm my nerves.
It was sometime after when I found myself sitting on the front lawn, legs splayed out in front of me as I tried to get my mind to settle.
"Hey, you okay?" Alphonse asked from my side, I knew he'd been talking about something, but it seemed my mind wanted to be elsewhere at the moment.
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine." I replied evenly, my headspace clearing as I returned my attention to the world around me. ' Seems I have a habit of being lost in thought,'
"You sure? You've been spacing out all afternoon, why don't you just tell me what's on your mind?" He pressed gently and I could feel his eyes on me. I felt a little guilty, constantly relying on him to talk through my thoughts. I sighed.
"I didn't know reattaching automail was so… rough, " I looked down at the grass below me, picking at the earth distractedly while Alphonse regarded me from my side.
"It's not easy. Brother deals with a lot of pain due to it. It's tough on him. But he'll be okay Em, you don't need to be worried. He's strong," Alphonse assured me, but the sentiment did little to ease my nerves.
"He shouldn't have to be strong all of the time, certainly not over something like this," I commented bitterly, ripping up a few stray blades of grass before lightly tossing them away. Alphonse hummed softly at that.
"I agree, but you know how he is. He won't let anyone see him struggle. He's too stubborn for that." I huffed through my nose, somewhat irritated by the notion. Edward was too stubborn for his own good. The fact that he felt like he had to be careful about everything, every emotion, no matter how much pain he was in, he still felt the need to perform.
He reminded me of myself in that way. Perhaps that was what made me the most angry. And in a funny way, amused at myself. Comparing myself to him, as if we could be anything alike. Then again, in that respect maybe we were more alike than I cared to admit. It was just a shame we seemed to relate so much over something I'd wish on no one.
"Jeeze, you look like shit," A familiar blonde commented from above me, hands on his hips as he raised a brow at me with that ever-so-infuriating smirk. 'I've grown fond of that smirk, damnit.
"This coming from the cyborg?" I responded cooly, flashing the boy a smirk of my own as I challenged him. He took it with ease as his smirk twisted into a laugh.
"I don't think I'm metal enough to qualify as a cyborg." He rolled his eyes playfully as he proceeded to roll his newly crafted shoulder, the metal glinting in the afternoon sunlight.
"So, how do I look?" He asked, flashing a grin as he soaked up the satisfaction he felt at having his limbs rebuilt after several days without them. Alphonse chuckled.
"The real question is, how do you feel?"
"I feel great, a hundred percent!" He announced proudly, smiling at his brother in earnest as he regarded him.
"I'm glad to see you're feeling better," I said giving the boy a considering look as if he might disappear right in front of me. Alphonse chuckled from beside me.
"She was worried about you," We were sitting close enough for the armor to nudge my side and I visibly flushed as I desperately tried to defend myself.
"Like hell I was!" I huffed, swiping at the boy who simply continued to laugh at my embarrassment. Edward cocked a confused brow at the two of us as we playfully squabbled before shaking his head dismissing whatever it was he wanted to say.
"Anyway, lemme grab the scrap from your armor in the house and I'll get you fixed up right away. Sound good?" Edward questioned, and the armor nodded simply in return.
"Yeah, sounds good." Edward's eyes lingered for a moment as he considered us before trailing elsewhere as he trotted off up the porch steps and back into the house for a moment. Once again, it was blissfully silent outside, only the thoughts raging inside my mind to disrupt the quiet. Once I was sure Edward was out of sight, I reeled on the armor beside me.
"What the hell was that for?" I snapped, eyes piercing the side of the metal helmet perched atop the armored boy as he regarded me with a hum.
"What do you mean?" I could tell he was feigning innocence and I practically squawked at him.
"That! Why would you out me like that?" The armor shook with a lighthearted laugh in response.
"I was just helping you." I gaped at him.
"Helping me with what ?" I growled but the boy dismissed it with a one-shouldered shrug when the door to the house swung open again, announcing the arrival of Edward and the Major as the two men swept off the porch and back onto the lawn in preparation for fixing Alphonse's armor. I eyed the metal boy as his brother came to stand in front of us, dumping a heavy blanket filled with various metal pieces unceremoniously at his feet. I recognized all the different parts immediately as part of Aphonse's armor from before it got splintered into pieces…back before he destroyed them. Edward stooped down to separate the pile, spreading them out more evenly along the blanket as he assembled everything. Deeming it sufficient with a nod, he rose to his feet when the Major regarded him from his side.
"How does this work exactly? Will he be able to move once he's fixed?" He asked, assessing the metal pieces on the ground below, and Alphonse's armor studiously. Edward swept his bangs out of his face as he considered the man.
"Well, first things first, I gotta make sure there's enough material here to work with. You sure this is everything?" The blonde regarded his brother and the armor responded with a nod.
"Yep. The MPs were kind enough to grab every last piece of me they could find." Al said, watching as his brother stepped up to him, lifting his helmet off to regard the inside of the metal shell.
"See that in there? That's the anchoring point, it's the seal that binds Al's soul to the armor." Edward explained, twisting his shoulder out of the way slightly for the Major to take a look inside. The large man leaned in, blue eyes trailing the inside of the armor as he absorbed what lay within. I stretched my neck to peer over the lip of the metal grill but didn't see much as I was too low on the ground to look into the armor. I sat back a moment later, and my eyes were caught by the gaping hole along the side of Alphonse's armor. I dared a glance inside, and sure enough, the hastily scrawled blood seal sat comfortably against the back of the armor's inner wall. I had almost forgotten what it looked like, despite the many times I had an opportunity to look inside, I usually opted not to, choosing to see him for more than just the seal inside the metal shell. He constantly had others peeking inside out of curiosity, I didn't need to add to the gawking.
"It looks like it was drawn with blood," Armstrong concluded as he studied the intricate design and Edward paled slightly.
"Yeah, that's my blood, I was in a bit of a hurry at the time," He supplied, giving the Major an awkward smile. The man swooned, imaginary tears welling up his tear ducts.
"Goodness Gracious! What a beautiful display of brother love!" The man cried waving his large arms about him like some kind of stage opera. The boys looked like they were gonna be sick.
"Jeeze, numb it up Major-spaz, we don't need you balling all over us," Edward groaned, returning Alphonse's helmet to his body before taking a step back, ignoring the blubbering man beside him. As he finished prepping for the transmutation, I took that time to get up off the ground, shuffling over to stand beside the Major to optimize my view of the work. Edward positioned himself over the scattered fragments of armor and breathed in long and slow. Clapping his hands, blue-energized sparks sprung forth as he pressed his hands against Alphonse's chest plate. Seemingly like out of a fantasy novel, the littered remains of the armor began to knit together, one body part after another re-actualizing into existence as the debris below was absorbed and refitted to complete Alphonese's armor. With one last spark, the transmutation was complete, and there stood Alphonse, whole once more. He tested his rebuilt figure with a flex of his leather gloves in front of him, evaluating their elasticity.
"How's that?" Edward beamed, preening at his success. Seeming satisfied, Alphonse gave his brother a short nod.
"It's great, thank you," He said delightedly. His brother waved him off with a smile.
"Don't mention it. Shall we do the usual routine then?" He inquired with a quirk of his brow at his brother and the Major from beside me cleared his throat.
"Routine?" He questioned and the two boys turned to regard him.
"Yeah. Every once in a while Al and I spar to keep up our skills. As our teacher always said 'You need to train the body to train the mind.' It's a nice way to have a friendly skirmish between brothers." Edward supplied with a nudge of his brother's side, the armor nodded simply in turn.
"So…you're telling me you just got your bodies fixed and now you're gonna scuff them up again?" I asked incredulously, eyeing the two boys and Edward laughed as Alphonse rubbed the back of his helmet.
"Pretty much yeah," He snorted playfully when I rolled my eyes at them.
"Alright I guess, but it's on you when you get a wrench stuck in your head," I clicked my tongue and the boy simply rolled his eyes at my jest.
"Har har," He responded sarcastically and I raised my hand up placatingly with a shrug of my shoulder, allowing him to take the damage should they break themselves again. The two walked off aways further down the lawn as the Major and I watched from a safe distance. All I could do was shake my head at them.
"Honestly those two…"
After about an hour of rigorous roughhousing, the two had had enough, Edward having no choice but to submit to a rather amusing loss due to Alphonse's glove-to-the-face attack.
"I swear it was an accident, you came out of nowhere," Alphonse whined as the brothers continued to bicker over how the loss had started
"You make it sound like it was my fault," Edward grumbled as he swept a tired hand over his face while the two made their way back across the lawn.
"I'm not saying that you just snuck up on me, what else was I supposed to do?" Alphonse wrung his leather hands tightly and the older brother stopped his tired march to stare up at him.
"You could have not hit me in the face!" Edward continued to round on his brother, to which the boy apologized profusely and I just shook my head as they came to stand above where I had been perched comfortably on the lawn.
"Alright you two, knock it off and just make up already," I groaned with a tired laugh as I rolled my eyes at them. The two varied in their responses but ultimately came to a truce as they regarded one another.
"Sorry,"
"I'm sorry too,"
I quirked a smirk up at the two of them as I sat back on my already tired arm. ' Much more of this and I was gonna need a sling for both of them.'
"There, now don't you feel better?" I asked teasingly which resulted in a frown from Edward. Classically of course.
"Are you patronizing us?" He didn't seem all that amused by my response and I simply smiled at him.
"Of course not, I just didn't wanna hear you two bicker all night," I quipped and the boy turned his gaze to the horizon as he regarded the hour. The sun hung low in the sky, reaching for the distant mountain range beyond as sunset drew closer with every passing minute.
"I guess it is getting a little late," He commented absentmindedly as his eyes scoured the vast plains beyond. "That's what he's focused on?' I raised a brow at him but chose not to voice anything as I carefully got to my feet.
"Well, If I had to guess dinner should be done soon, you might wanna get cleaned up beforehand." I said, dusting the grass off of my pants and backside, making note of the glaring grass stains 'Damn, and these were my favorite pair…'
"Actually, I was thinking about visiting the house," Edward commented offhandedly, gaze still drifting off elsewhere and I gave him a considering look.
"Really? You'd go back there?" Alphonse asked surprised, Edward shrugged his shoulders easily.
"Sure, why not? Not like we'll get the chance to see it again anytime soon." The wheels in my head seemed to fail lining up as I continued to hang off of his statement.
"I thought you guys didn't have a house here anymore?" I inquired, confused If I had misunderstood the situation. Edward turned his eyes onto me as he regarded me.
"We don't, we burned it down the day we left for Central after I passed my exam." He offered plainly and I was sure my face looked ridiculous as I gaped at him.
"You guys didn't tell me you burned your own house down," I said in disbelief, eyes darting between the two of them. Edward scratched his cheek sheepishly while his brother rubbed the back of his helmet awkwardly.
"Yeah well, if we had no home to return to then it would be easier to never come back," Edward offered clearly aware of how unconvincing his reasoning sounded and I just shook my head at them flabbergasted.
"No wonder you guys are so…" I wasn't entirely sure I should finish that sentence, and the two paused as they waited for me to finish. I paled as Edward glowered at me.
"What? Say it," He commanded, and I waved him off quickly as I tried to reel back on my previous mistake.
"Nothing, nothing, never mind," I laughed nervously as the boy stared me down for a moment, seeming unwavering in letting this go, before slumping his shoulders as he settled with it.
"Whatever, let's just go, before it's too dark outside." Edward sighed, sweeping past me back into the house for a moment as I just stood there dumbly in front of Alphonse. I shrugged at him silently as his soul-projected eyes looked me over. If he felt like saying something, I wouldn't have known as he just quietly observed me for a moment as we stood there. I wasn't sure if I was unsettled or grateful.
I certainly would have been more grateful for that than what I was experiencing currently.
Armstrong had taken it upon himself to accompany us as we trekked our way along the countryside in pursuit of the remains of the brother's childhood home. It wouldn't have been much of a problem had it not been for the feeling of constantly being watched. The major had insisted he come along as a means of protection, and you can assume how well that went over with Edward. Even so, the man persisted, and Edward continued to tolerate it which was actually quite refreshing. I could do without the constant watchful eyes, however.
Coming up along a long dirt path that split four ways, a large pile of something sat a few yards away off the beaten path and the boys leisurely approached it. As we got closer, I recognized the vague signs of a home. A white picket fence charred a dark ugly brown surrounded the perimeter of the old property. Even after years of having time to settle since the initial fire, the yard looked horrendously marred with black, the flora hardly having the nutrients to take over the landscape among the charred rubble. When they explained the house had been burned down, I imagined the basic structure of the house may have remained intact, but that seemed farther from the truth. The large mound of blackened framework and old wood looked more like a dumpster fire. I could hardly even imagine a childhood taking place here, let alone theirs. Alphonse stepped up to the shallow remains of the Elric family home, traversing the many objects and crumbling pillars as he reminisced.
"This is where the front door was, and this was the sitting room, and here the fireplace." Alphonse motioned to the respective places along the charred ground as he presented the layout of their previous home. He stopped for a moment as he stood over a particular pile of rubble. "We'd get a fire going when it got cold." He commented as he looked it over, fondly remembering their time there.
"You'd always find an excuse not to chop the wood yourself. I always had to do it," Alphonse remarked as he swiveled his head toward his brother, to which Edward simply smiled.
"Yep, back when this was home. It's been a long time since we had one to return to, huh?" He said bittersweet as he regarded the blackened remnants of their house with fondness. I could sense the melancholy hidden under the surface of his comment, but even so, he soldiered forward with a smile.
"What are you talking about? This is you're home." Armstrong smiled warmly as he peered down at the boys, and a smile tugged at my lips as I considered them.
"Home is where the heart is right? You may travel all over the world, and see many new things, but your hearts belong here." I said, feeling my heart swell as the two of them smiled at each other, that silent communication of theirs returning for just a moment. As I stood there, I took a moment to just…look at them. And really look. They had an impressive bond that I couldn't even hope to grasp myself. It had been months of suppressing my memories of that place. The Lab. I'd hardly thought about what it meant to really leave. My smile fell into one of solemn realization suddenly and I dropped my gaze. I'd almost forgotten what I had left behind, and what I possibly could never hope to gain.
"Frankly I'm a little jealous." I voiced, a small trickle of envy creeping into my heart as my spirits fell.
"Why's that?" Edward asked, concern flitting from his tone and I knew everyone was looking at me now. Even so, I continued with a bittersweet smile.
"I wish I had a family, people who'll wait for me to come home to. You boys are lucky, to have all this waiting when you return your bodies to normal." I said, sadness seeming to seep deep into my soul. I thought of the lab again, my lab mates' faces growing hazier as time went on. 'When had I forgotten their faces? Why couldn't I remember the people I loved?'
"What are you talking about? You do have a family." Edward's voice rang out across my thoughts, swiftly cutting them from my mind. I lifted my head as my eyes shot up to look at him. The blonde looked to his brother again as the boy saddled up beside him. They smiled at each other as their shared thoughts were assured before they returned their gazes to me.
"It's us," Alphonse said simply, like a known fact that had been here all along. Perhaps it had. The shared fondness for each other had been there right under my nose all this time. To see that they felt this way and that I no longer had to worry if I was accepted…it felt… wonderful .
I couldn't stop the silly smile that crept across my face as I willed my eyes to stay dry. To say they did would be a lie. I wiped at them furiously as I tried to hide them away. The Major, on the other hand, did not try to do the same. He allowed his tears to flow freely as the large man sniffled at my side. I offered him a sympathetic smile as I patted his arm lightly. Life had been so eventful lately, I hardly had time to slow down, and just, appreciate what I had right in front of me.
The Major rolled his shoulders, ridding himself of his tears as he straightened up again. The soldier's revere was ever so present once again as he regarded us.
"It's getting late, we should return to the Rockbell home immediately." He sounded so commanding it was a bit jarring considering the man who was blubbering like a baby only moments ago. 'And I thought the boys were a whirlwind of emotions…'
"That's alright Major, we know where we're going. Why don't you go ahead of us?" Edward offered simply, returning his hands to his pant pockets with a gentle smile. The larger man shook his head.
"I can't leave you three out here, it's not safe." He tried to sound convincing, but the three of us weren't having it. Shaking myself free of the previous emotions, I shared a small smile with the brothers.
"Go on Major, you don't have to worry about us anymore, we'll be fine. I'm sure Pinako and Winry could use your help," I said, encouraging the man. He gave the three of us a deliberate look as he considered it for a moment, then caved with a sigh.
"Fair enough, don't stray behind long, I don't wish to come looking for you." He said and I waved him off, my smile growing.
"We wouldn't dream of making you have to fetch us." Absorbing my words carefully, the man gave us a swift nod before making his way down the dirt path toward the Rockbell family home. I let out a small sigh of relief as I watched the tower of a man disappear along the trail.
"You're quite persuasive," Edward commented from my side as the two boys saddled up beside me. I shot him a smirk.
"What can I say? I'm hard to resist." The blonde rolled his eyes with a playful shake of his head as we slowly strolled off the property, slinking off to a small hill not far from the huge rubble of a childhood home long left abandoned.
The sun was almost completely engulfed by the lines of the distant mountains now as the ever-persistent twilight came to reclaim the sky for the evening. Rich orange hues and beautiful pinks blotted the sky as the clouds were drawn closer to the horizon, soon to be enshrouded in darkness.
I sat down on the cool damp grass below as I admired the view, Edward and Alphonse were apprehensive to follow, but soon joined me as the three of us quietly sat there, eyes regarding the magnificent display. Three long years, I had spent inside the lab, and while I tried not to mull over it, I couldn't help but be reminded of how many sunsets just like this one had been missed in favor of utterly blank walls, and cool hard floors. Memories began to flood through my mind's eye like many times before, and I sat with them. Darkness had become a constant since my conception it seemed. My first day in the lab after successfully awakening had been absolute hell. My whole body was set ablaze as brand new nerves shot with searing pain and sensations I'd never felt before. My mind was so cloudy and unfocused, I was still surprised I could remember any of it. And even so, every day continued to bring forth more darkness, in cruel and unpredictable ways. Could I ever escape it? Could the sun escape leaving darkness in it's wake? Could the moon ever thrive without the twilight? As the sun set, I became increasingly aware of just how gloomy life had become.
"The sunsets are beautiful out here…" I felt my body tighten, a lump forming in my throat and I tried not to gasp as emotions began to swirl violently in my center.
"Em?" Edward asked slowly, a small trickle of concern flitting off of him from my side and I tried my best to hold back the onslaught of tears I felt brimming my eyes.
"Ever since I first woke up, in this body, being what I am, I've been led to believe I would never amount to anything more than someone else's experiment- a lab rat with no purpose but for blood, organs, and psychological studies. I was a blueprint for a future I would never get to see," They remained deathly quiet as I continued, and I tried to stuff down the pain I felt growing in the pit of my stomach. " My life has been filled with so much pain, and suffering, and worthlessness…and fear…" I choked back a sob, swallowing down the thick lump harshly with a shuttering exhale. I smiled softly as the sun descended behind the mountains, at last, a cloak of black swallowing the orange hues in the distance.
"I've also been filled with joy, excitement, curiosity…and love. The day we met changed the course of my existence and gave my life new meaning. A purpose. Call it God's will, the universe, fate, or pure circumstance I don't care…whatever it was, I believe now that we were meant to meet…And I'm so glad that we did." I paused for a moment, regarding the darkness that swept the valley as the earth settled into twilight. Even despite my gratitude, my grief was persistent. I thought of the sun once again as the darkened sky grew harder to see.
"I only wish I didn't have to pay so much just to see the sun again…" And just like that, everything came rushing forward. I covered my mouth with the palm of my hand tightly as a sob escaped me. My shoulders shook as wave after wave of grief, pain, and sadness overtook me. But I wasn't alone this time. Alphonse rested a hand on my back, soothingly and leaned in, as he wordlessly comforted me. Edward silently brought his hand to rest on my head, pulling me close and I let go. Sobs racked my body relentlessly as years of built-up anxiety, rage, fear, and sadness were finally set free into the ether to be dissipated and put to rest. I was so afraid for so many years, of the future I was sure I'd never get to see, of the past I didn't know even existed, and a present that always seemed to bring forth pain and disappointment. For once, however, I wasn't only crying over sad things. I had been graciously taken in by two boys who had no business putting the life of another in their own hands, but for whatever reason, they did it anyway, for no other reason than because they cared. I was immensely grateful, and someday, I hoped to repay their kindness.
We stayed like that for what felt like hours before my nose was so filled with snot I couldn't breathe, and I gasped for air a little more dramatically than I meant and I laughed when Edward raised a brow at me with a concerned smile.
"Take it easy or you're gonna fill up Rhoas falls with that much snot." He commented teasingly and I laughed wetly as I wiped my nose with the sleeve of my hoodie.
"Ew gross," I responded as another wave of uncontained giggles escaped me. Alphonse chuckled quietly from my other side as we reveled in the energy of the moment. The sun had long since laid to rest for the night, making way for the moon as it carved a path along the star-filled sky. I thought back to the conversation Edward and Alphonse had the other night. The stars, and how they'd looked up at them every night from the comfort of their childhood home. I looked above me as the stars were pressed into the eternal darkness of the twilight hour. It was beautiful, everything was when you truly considered it.
Everything was going to work out, somehow. I was becoming assured of that now.
After dinner, I took it upon myself to wash my face, clearing the redness from my eyes before heading upstairs for the night. Quietly traversing the dark hallway, I slipped into the bedroom shared between the brothers and myself and was surprisingly met with Alphonse who sat serenely under the moonlight pouring in through the window beside him. Slowly, I walked along the darkness, him not yet noticing me until I made my presence known as I sat down on the adjacent bed in front of him. Metal clanked as the armor shifted his gaze over to me, a light gasp flittering through it.
"Em?" He addressed me calmly, large red eyes scanning me as I regarded him for a moment. Even though there had been many times when Alphonse and I had been alone to talk, I'd yet to even think of bothering him with this question. It had already caused a constraining relationship between me and his brother…but.
"Al, can I ask you something? Something kinda personal?" I asked apprehensively as I tried to maintain eye contact with him. Red eyes met mine as he hummed in curiosity.
"Um sure, what is it?" He asked, intently looking back at me and I felt my diaphragm compress with anxiety again. I sucked in a slow breath and dropped my gaze as I searched for the proper words.
"Ed doesn't open up to me very well," I admitted, rubbing my palms together as I tried to ease my nerves. The armor snorted softly at the notion.
"He's like that with everyone. Did he give you a dry response to the question you're about to ask me?" He asked knowingly and I picked my head up to look at him with surprise.
"How did you know?" I asked and he shrugged his metal shoulders simply in response.
"Not the first time, unfortunately." He chuckled softly and I smiled as the tension eased slightly. Exhaling slowly, I asked the question.
"Can you tell me about Nina?" The armor's red projected eyes widened in surprise as his nonexistent breath hitched momentarily.
"Why do you wanna know about her?" He asked slowly, and I could feel the regret climbing, but I stuffed it down as I pressed on.
"Lt. Colonel Hughes brought her up a couple of days ago, at the train station. I asked Ed about her, but he didn't seem to wanna go into detail. And then he brought her up again when I apologized for my behavior on the train. I know it might be rude of me to be so nosey…but, just hearing her name makes you guys sad…I don't know I guess I just wanna know why." I said dropping my head as the anxiety rose painfully in my chest. Alphonse sighed quietly from his place on the opposite bed, metal creaking as he dropped his gaze.
"Nina was a little girl we met when we moved in with her dad -Mr. Tucker-, and her in Central three years ago. He was an alchemist who helped us while we studied for the State Alchemist exam. He transmuted her with the family dog…we couldn't save her…" He trailed off, the room growing uncomfortably silent. My stomach roiled at the new information, and I remembered then what the Lt. Colonel mentioned outside the train car that day in East City.
'-turns out, the way she was deconstructed matches the same alchemy Scar's been using to kill people.'-
Scar, the alchemist killer, saw Nina as a chimera and murdered her.
"How awful…" I said as the horrifying realization started to eat at me, deranged images plaguing my mind as my brain thought of the implications. Scar had a previous record of murdering a chimera, who was to say she'd be the only one? I had thought my fear of him was only limited with me being a thoughtless murder as a bystander, an unfortunate byproduct of trying to get to the Elrics, now, it seemed things were even more complicated. That man could and would actively kill me if given a second chance, and no longer was it out of happenstance. He was out for blood, and surely I was on his list. This whole situation was becoming even more grim, and I found myself chilled to the core. 'What would I do if we ever crossed paths with him?' He was more of a danger to me now than I ever would have considered before. I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that I was truly in danger so long as he was alive. Me, and the brothers as well. I shook the troubling thoughts away, willing my mind to recenter as I laid my eyes back on the youngest Elric, the armor's helmet bowed as his eyes glued themselves to the floor.
"I'm sorry, that sounds like it was a really terrible thing for you to go through," I said, struggling to grasp just what I wanted to say. What do you say in a situation like this? What could you say really?
"It's okay, it was a long time ago." Alphonse waved it off with another sigh, ridding himself of the memories and he lifted his gaze to regard me again.
"In any case, that's behind us now. We may not have been able to save her, but we've managed to help many others along the way, like you," Alphonse said, his voice light, and I smiled softly at him.
"Yeah, that's very true," I said quietly. The room fell silent again, and I couldn't ignore the compelling sense to do more in that moment. Slowly, I stood from my place on the adjacent bed and stepped up to the armor. He lifted his helmet to look up at me as I approached, and without a word, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, pulling him close. A soft gasp rang through the metal as he froze, and I just held him. There were no words, just a hug that I believed we both desperately needed. Leather hands crossed over my back as he leaned into the hug, the silence comfortable as I stood there. I held him a little tighter as my emotions swam inside me. I wouldn't cry, not this time. But god, I'd almost forgotten how good it felt to do this…how long had it been since I had a hug?... How long had it been since he had one? That was a sobering thought.
We pulled away and I gave him a comforting smile and the boy laughed nervously with a rub behind his helmet. Just then another set of footsteps entered the room and I turned at the familiar sound of half metal half boy when Edward greeted us with a raised brow.
"Everything okay in here?" He asked, halting in the doorway, apprehensive to fully take stock inside the room.
"Nope, just talking," I answered simply, giving Alphonse a sideways glance before lightly tip-toeing over to my own bed further down the room, preparing my nightly routine without another word. Edward considered us for a moment, but ultimately shrugged it off with a plop of his coat and jacket onto the bed frame of his temporary bed, following his own preparations for rest.
The two boys talked for a moment, planning out the next couple of days of our travel as we were sure to be back on the road by daylight tomorrow. I thought of the train ride, the hard benches, and the boorish pass of time. And then I thought of the boys, turning my eyes over to them as they laughed about something I had paid no mind to. At least, I'd have them to keep me company. There was plenty of uncertainty going forward, but as promised, I would see this wild adventure through to the end.
At least now, I had a family to do it with.
Awe, well wasn't that nice? We got to explore more sides of both Edward and Alphonse's personalities in this chapter, as well as having Armstrong play a slightly bigger role than in the previous chapter. And we got some wonderful fluff to break up the dramatic chapters. Hurray!
Something I'd like to touch on now that we are at this point, I'm attempting to make it clear that Alphonse has more aspects to his character than just "Edward's younger brother" and that at times, he has some pretty big differences in view as opposed to him. As such, their relationship can be more well-rounded than before, and while Alphonse is still pretty non-confrontational, he isn't above squabbling with his brother when it comes to important matters, and it's important that Alphonse feels like his own character, capable of his own feelings and perspectives, who won't allow himself to be walked all over by his older sibling simply because he's the younger of the two.
With that being said, Edward will always look at his brother as being the younger less experienced of the two, and due to his inflated ego, he will always have a tad of the "older superiority" attitude to him. Thankfully for Al, he isn't the only person they're traveling with anymore, and while Em compliments their personalities in a lot of ways, she also comes into conflict with them too. Edward especially. Now that Em has had some character development under her belt and some time to get acquainted with the brothers, her true personality can be given time to shine and one of the many traits she possesses is being a little more confrontational than Alphonse is, hence being capable of calling Edward out on his bullshit.
This will definitely play a role later on in the story, but for now, we'll just sit back and let the three of them swim in the same pond without a worry about what is to come. Mwahahaha!
As always, your continued support is appreciated and for all of you who've followed along so far from the sidelines, I appreciate you taking the time to read my story. Cheers! :)