It's My Life
Today, Harry and Severus were going to the Dursley home to set up the golem to keep up the image that Harry was living there. It was about 5:00 pm as they arrived because Harry informed Severus that Miss. Figg would be out for weekly Bingo night and they had needed an opening where there was no chance of being seen. Though, the secondary protection was being under Harry's cloak. Harry and Severus walked up to the Dursley home and Severus knocked three times. Finally, the door opened to reveal Vernon Dursley. Severus pushed his way inside. Harry closed the door and pulled the cloak off to reveal them.
"Bringing him back so soon? I told you nobody wanted you, boy," Vernon said as Harry flinched and looked down.
Severus pulled his wand and held it on the uncle, Dudley and Petunia had come into the main hall to see the sight of Severus and Harry there. "Silence yourself, Dursley," Severus remarked. "I'm not here to bring Potter back to you. In fact, we're here only to ensure that the headmaster who left Harry in your care all those years ago doesn't suspect he is gone at all. So unless you desire to face my wrath for how you've treated Lily's child…You will be quiet and play along accordingly. Have I made myself clear?"
Vernon nodded his head a few times. "You knew Lily?" Petunia asked.
"Ah, Tuney, so unpleasant to see you again," Severus sneered as Harry found himself wondering why Severus would call Petunia that.
"Severus Snape?" Petunia asked. "It's been so long,"
"Not long enough." Severus scoffed.
"You two know each other?" Vernon asked.
"He's from Cokeworth, on Spinner's End. Lily and I were walking distance to him…" Petunia revealed. "They became best friends and both attended that magic school together."
Harry didn't know Severus was his mother's best friend. Well, learn something new every day. "You mean Hogwarts," Severus told Petunia.
"Yes, there." Petunia replied. "Now, what do you want?"
"I spoke of my intentions." Severus stated. "Miss. Figg was assigned by Dumbledore to check in on Harry's status every week on Wednesdays and she reports to him that the boy is still here and well. Obviously, Harry will not be remaining here because you're incapable of restraining yourselves from abusing him. However, if you do not desire to be harassed by Dumbledore, nor have Harry found and forced back into your lives…You will do as I say." He remarked.
"Very well…What must we do?" Vernon asked.
"I am going to construct a golem that will take on the appearance of Harry Potter. It will remain here during the summers, to make Dumbledore believe Harry is staying with you and safe in the blood wards. The golem will be magically imbued to only act as Harry on Wednesdays from the hours of 1:45 pm to 3:15 pm. It will respond as Harry to speak with Figg and ensure all is well here. The rest of the time, this golem will act as a lightweight statue you can put away. When school resumes, I will bring Harry here the morning he is to board the train; you will take him to King's Cross. This is to let Figg report to Dumbledore that you took Harry to the station and he did cross the platform to board the train. She'll follow and ensure he's dropped off. Am I understood?"
"Yes," Petunia and Vernon nodded.
"Good." Severus said as he pulled a crystal from his pocket. "Potter," He looked to the boy. Harry pulled out a few strands of hair and gave them to Severus. The man set things on the floor and raised his wand, muttering a spell as the items Severus put together began to shake and fuse. It only took moments for there to be a Harry look-a-like standing in the room. Severus uttered something else as a strand of blue formed from Harry's forehead to the golem's. "Harry, I need you to think only of the check-ins that Figg does. This is to ensure the golem knows how to respond and act. Harry nodded as he brought forth the memories and let them flow into the golem. The connection broke afterwards as the golem opened its eyes, giving a single nod and then remaining still and quiet.
"That's it?" Harry asked.
"Very simple process. This copy has your memories pertaining to the task, sensors, and a magical core enough to fool Figg that it's really you." Severus stated. "Now, you will place the golem away, carefully and let it out tomorrow at 1:30 pm. It can be put back until the next Wednesday. You will repeat this until school begins again."
"Fine," Petunia said.
"Oh, and you'd be wise not to abuse this one…If it breaks, Dumbledore will think Harry has died and you'll be getting a visit from him." Severus informed before turning to Harry, who got out his cloak and threw it over both of them.
. . .
Severus apparated them both back to just outside the Malfoy Manor gates. Harry and Severus headed in and through the door before the cloak came back off.
"I admit that cloak is pretty useful, but there will still be rules…" Severus reminded.
"You mentioned," Harry replied.
"Tomorrow you will be staying here with the Malfoy's while I prepare my things to move. Don't give them any trouble," Severus said.
"Yes, sir," Harry nodded.
"Good. Now…" Severus led Harry into the main sitting area. "How are you feeling from last week?"
"I think I'm alright. Everything is fading, no pain," Harry responded calmly. "I don't even believe there are scars."
"No, my salve was both healing the injury and no scarring. I can't do much about the scars you had before that already formed," Severus informed.
"It's fine." Harry told him, obviously not worried. "It's weird to see you being this way with me, sir."
"The feeling is mutual, Potter," Severus remarked. "But we'll make do with the changes to each other's lives for the sake of a better outcome overall."
"It'll be different back at school, won't it? You'll appear to despise me," Harry mentioned.
"It's only for show, Pot-Harry," Severus stated. "I will scold you if you do something you're not supposed to. That is my job as not only your teacher, but guardian as well." Harry nodded to him. "I am not your enemy, Harry. I never have been, not even with beliefs that you're like your father. And I've never hated you."
Narcissa, Draco, and Lucius were coming closer to them, but when Narcissa heard Harry and Severus having a serious talk; she held her boys back and gave the signal to be quiet. It might be wrong, but they listened in. Severus and Harry were actually talking and, seemingly, working out their differences.
"Could have fooled me." Harry retorted. "Look, I don't want to fight with you, Professor. If we're going to in each other's lives as more than what we have been, then I think we should both put the past behind us, and get along. I won't be sarcastic or rude to you if you aren't cruel to me. I understand that in school, things will have to be a certain way…But I am asking that it's not over the top. Be a teacher, but not master. I need a guardian, not an abuser," Severus went to say something. "I know you've never physically hurt me, but when you come at me in class and make all those comments about how I'm like my father or that I'm terrible at potions…It's mental/emotional abuse, sir. I continue to fail at potions because I'm always worried you're going to give me a hard time, so I lose focus and end up screwing up."
Severus had never considered he was causing Harry to fail with how he behaved. It was an eye-opener for him. And Harry had a point; they were going to be in each other's lives then there needed to be some middle ground where they understood one another better. Severus needed to stop being a jerk to Harry, and in turn, Harry had promised to not strike back in sarcasm. A mutual respect. Severus could live with that.
"I have never hated you, Harry." Severus said again as Harry looked at Severus softly. "I disliked how similar to your father you are. I, shamefully, admit that I believed you grew up pampered and spoiled. Your father grew up the same way, so it made him lazy and arrogant…Thinking he existed above the rules and could do what he wanted. You share some of those traits, Potter. And you look just like James. But as I admitted several days ago; it was wrong of me to assume you were him over the past he and I had. I shouldn't have taken my contempt of the past out on you. You are a good student; I've seen your grades. Potions could use some work,"
"It's not my strong suit," Harry sighed. "I guess I don't take after my family who were exceptionally good at it."
"I'm sure you have it in you, Harry. Your mother was also a very gifted witch with an aptitude for potions. She was ones of the best in our year, we often paired off together despite being Gryffindor and Slytherin housed." Severus enlightened. "You just needed the proper instruction and given a chance to succeed. I've been on you since first year, I don't make it easy to be in my class. And I wasn't fair to you, assuming you weren't paying attention because you were always writing when I talked."
"I took notes because I was told by older students that potions were easier if you could look back on what was told and what you did. I wasn't doing it for you to think I wasn't paying attention; I just didn't want to forget anything I was taught because from the moment I learned I'd be taking potions…I was excited to learn them. More than Transfiguration, Herbology, even Charms. I wanted to do potions, so I wrote everything down to be able to study it hard. I heard you were a potions master, and I wanted to learn everything I could from you, Professor." Harry confessed.
"Potter, I am sorry for how I've treated you over the last four years. My past with your father blinded me, and I made very bad decisions regarding you as my student because of it." Severus said calmly. "I give you my word as your guardian and teacher that from now own, I will only give you a hard time if you've done something to stupid or dangerous to deserve the scolding." He promised. "I do not desire to fight with you as we journey into this new…Relationship as guardian and ward, or whatever. I believe we need to establish a mutual respect for one another. I will still have to be your teacher at school, but I will also be your guardian. You may not be aware of this, Harry…But when I found you'd come to Hogwarts four years ago; I made a silent vow to your mother and father that I would protect you with my life, and thus far, I have." Severus revealed.
"I-I know. You were using a counter curse on my broom during the first quidditch match. You defended Ron, Hermione, and I from Filch when Mrs. Norris was petrified, saying we were probably in the wrong place at the wrong time. You purposely taught Lupin's class when he was out to show us about werewolves, and as a master of potions, I'm sure you were brewing Lupin's wolfsbane too. You came to the shrieking shack to protect me and my friends, and you put yourself between Lupin and us when he transformed." Harry stated. "I know you've been looking out for me, despite how you treated me and I've never understood why until now when you said you promised my mother and father you'd protect me. I realized something connected to that when we were at my aunt and uncle's, when my aunt said you and my mom were best friends."
"We were," Severus admitted.
"I understand the promise to my mom, but you hated my father…Why promise him you'd protect me? I understand it may personal, Professor…But if we're to make this work with a mutual respect and understanding…Then I need to understand your side of things." Harry mentioned.
"I owe your father a life debt, and since he is not alive for me to repay it…I chose to do so through you. Keeping you safe." Severus explained.
"How do you owe him a debt if he was your bully?" Harry asked.
"Your father had three good friends, Potter. They were Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew. I found out as a student that they were leaving the castle once a month. One time, I followed Lupin, which had taken me to the path under the Whomping Willow to the Shrieking Shack on a full moon…I found myself staring at a transformed Lupin. He never saw me because your father dragged me back, and pushed our rivalry aside to come save me, then take me back to safety. I'd be dead if not for your father coming to get me. This happened in our fifth year. I still hated your father, but I owed him for his act…I did thank him, and promised that I would owe him, only one time. It never got cashed in as shortly after graduation, your mother and father married, then had you…Then they were killed a year beyond that. So I visited Godric's Hollow before your first year at Hogwarts, when I learned you would be coming, and promised your parents at their grave, that I would protect you no matter what." Severus informed.
"The way you always looked at me suggested you couldn't stand my presence…" Harry confessed.
"I believed you were like your father. You do look just like him, Potter, the resemblance is uncanny," Severus said. "And you have some of his traits about breaking the rules, the sarcasm…" He paused. "But there is something else you have that I found myself seeing often. Your mother's-,"
"Eyes. I have my mother's eyes." Harry nodded. "Everyone tells me that. Sirius, Remus…Even Pettigrew in third year told me I look so much like my father, except my eyes." He explained.
"You have her heart and kindness too." Severus told him.
"Professor…How come you said you were my mother's best friend?" Harry asked.
Severus looked off to the side slightly. "Our friendship was ended by her because I ruined it in a rage from your father's bullying. I said something unforgiveable."
"What…Did you say?" Harry pushed.
"Your father was giving me a hard time and your mother rushed in to stop him. Your father did, assumingly because he loved her…But when your mother tried to check on me, I snapped at her that I didn't need the help of a filthy mud-blood." Severus confessed as Harry's eyes widened. "I lost her friendship that day, so my redemption was promising to protect you."
"I'm sure she forgave you," Harry reassured.
"She didn't. We never spoke again, Potter," Severus remarked.
"Just because it wasn't spoken aloud does not mean it didn't happen. I know she had forgiven you, understanding it was a tense situation." Harry said.
"You don't know that." Severus sighed.
"I do because I have forgiven you for how you've treated me over your hatred of my father." Harry said firmly. "I know because I would have forgiven you for what happened," He added as Severus stared at him, surprised. "My mother's heart and kindness, remember? I get my forgiving nature from her, so if I can forgive you…I'm sure she had as well."
"Oddly enough, I believe you. But it doesn't change desiring to hear it from her, Harry. I do thank you for forgiving me, though." Severus said. "Back on topic, we agree to be civil and respectful to one another? Reacting accordingly to situations, such as getting in trouble and I get to act as your teacher or guardian depending on the matter?"
"Yes," Harry nodded, offering his hand to Severus, who took it and they shook hands to agree together on what was said. Afterward, Harry yawned.
"Maybe take a rest, Harry. Dinner is still a few hours away." Narcissa suggested, walking into the room with Draco and Lucius.
"No, I'm alright, Mrs. Malfoy. Thank you, though," Harry smiled. "I'm just going to make sure all my things are ready to move into the manor. Maybe write to my friends, who I'm sure are worried that I haven't talked to them much since summer started. Maybe send word to Sirius too, before he shows up unexpectedly," He bowed his head to the four standing there, then turned to head to get to his given room.
"Harry," Lucius stopped him as Harry looked back. "If it is safe for him to travel and he has access to a floo, he may come here for a visit. Just use Malfoy Manor Main Room," He informed.
"Thank you, Mr. Malfoy." Harry nodded.
"It also may not be best for you to use your owl," Draco offered. "Too many people know him, or her. Sorry, unfamiliar."
"Her. Hedwig," Harry replied. "What am I supposed to use then?"
"We've got a small owlery, you may pick a bird to use your communications. Hedwig will need to continue going to your aunt and uncle's place and letters handed off to the secondary owl to come to you here or at Potter Manor." Narcissa said. "It will be safer than risking anyone watching Hedwig come to you and revealing you're not actually there."
"Alright." Harry agreed.
"I'll lead you there," Draco offered. Harry smiled and walked off with Draco while the adults sat together.
"Was it wise to reveal what you did?" Lucius inquired to Severus.
"This guardianship situation will never work out if Harry and I can't get along. I have to earn his trust, and one of the ways is telling him the truth about why I was the way I was with him. We've agreed to respect one another, as well as work on understanding too. I can't very well stay silent with him." Severus stated. "And I haven't revealed everything. He doesn't need to know everything, only why I appeared to hate him. Though I never have…He's been through enough, but if we don't establish some kind of trust; I'll never be able to help him heal from the abuse or get him out of that mindset Narcissa mentioned."
"You think he still feels that way?" Narcissa asked softly.
"Depressed? Without a doubt. It doesn't just go away. If he was feeling of wanting to just let go and things end; it's going to take time to work through. I need him to be able to come to me for help, and talk about what's bothering him. Our new relationship isn't going to allow that for somewhile, but knowing what he does now will help him realize that he doesn't have to be afraid of me."
"Severus is right," Narcissa nodded. "We'll help all we can. Harry is free to send me messages while at Hogwarts, like Draco does. I'm close to him already, so I can help light that way to opening up to you."
Severus nodded lightly as Harry and Draco came back and there was a black owl on Harry's arm. "That was quick," Lucius chuckled.
"This is Shadow," Draco informed. "Harry named him,"
"Now all we have to do is get him and Hedwig introduced so that he knows to get letters from her at the Dursley home." Harry smiled as he stroked the owl's chest.