Pov Fey

It was nearly two in the morning when we returned to the castle. The corridors were silent and pitch dark. I held Blaise and Mattheo by the arm as we descended the narrow stairs toward the Slytherin common room. Their biceps seemed to flex, and their bodies pushed tightly against mine.

I had never been so close to a boy before, and being so surrounded by them heightened my nerves and made my heart pound. Blaise tapped the brick and whispered the newest password, 'Hogshead.'

The stone snake moved too slowly for my taste to reveal the door. Every second it took felt like an eternity, and every minuscule noise it made felt like a screaming Peeves alerting everyone to our misdoings.

Finally, as the door appeared, we rushed through, sighing in relief. The weight of our activities crashing down around us. The hours without sleep catching up to us all at once, and exhaustion begging to take over.

Draco and Lorenzo sat on the couch with a tired-looking Theo, and I wondered if they had tried to stay up and wait for us to return. Draco was tucked away against the side arm of the couch with his legs curled under him while Theo and Lorenzo were leaning against each other with their legs stretched out.

"Aww, look at them," I said softly.

Blaise snorted, "Yeah, look at them, sleeping, not having almost been eaten by a hound."

Mattheo grabbed a pillow from a nearby chair and beat them with it until they went from sleeping to cursing. I rushed over and grabbed Mattheo by the arm and tried to snatch the pillow, but he held it out of my reach over my head.

"You don't need to beat them."

"Ha, they've been sleeping peacefully. I just wanted to wake them and get them off to bed," he said, smiling innocently as the sleeping beauties rubbed their eyes and glared.

I went onto my tip toes and grabbed the pillow from his fingers, "You're so mean," I laughed.

Draco glared at us with his bleach-blonde hair sticking up at odd ends, "What the fuck?"

Lorenzo and Theo looked around, confused momentarily, before popping to their feet and wrapping me in their arms, "Thank god you made it back," Theo breathed.

Lorenzo squeezed me tight enough to crack my back and released me, grinning to reach into his pocket and pull out a tiny white chrysalis the size of his thumb, "I got it."

He placed it in my hand, wrapping my fingers around it safely before tugging me onto the couch, "We almost didn't get it. Professor Snape had a dozen students in detention,"

Draco scoffed, "Don't act like you didn't jump in and save the fucking day, Enzo."

Lorenzo's head fell to the side, confused, "What are you talking about?"

"The fucking smoke bomb you set off. Don't play dumb…"

"I didn't…"

Theo coughed, "That was me."

My eyes widened, "Really? You set off a smoke bomb?"

He nodded, "I went to the Weasleys and told them about a 'prank,'" he rolled his eyes, "I wanted to play in detention, and they handed it over half-priced."

He shrugged as if it was no big deal.

"Fucking Weasleys," Draco muttered sourly.

Lorenzo hollered, "They are going to get a kick out of you going to the hospital wing!"

My eyes widened as I turned to Draco. I grabbed his face and searched him for any sign of injury or illness, "Were you hurt? Why did you have to go to the hospital wing?"

He seemed to soften in my hands for a moment before he pulled away, grumbling, "I wasn't hurt. I had to distract Snape. I couldn't think of any other way to keep him out long enough for Enzo to get the moth."

"Thank you, Draco."

Lorenzo hopped in his seat, "Alright, alright, enough about Malfoy. What did you get from the forest?"

I tugged out the small vile of dew from my trouser pocket and let him examine it.

Their eyes searched for something special about the water but found nothing.

"Water? You went searching for water?" Lorenzo asked disappointed

Mattheo nodded, "Yep. Little fox made us hike over an hour into the Forbidden Forest for water."

I rolled my eyes, "It's dew…"

"Dew?" Theo asked, "What's so special about it?"

Blaise fielded his question, "Dew untouched by sunlight or human feet."

"For at least seven days," I added

"Why couldn't it be regular water?"

Mattheo scoffed, "Idiot. It has to be free of human contaminants for the transformation to work."

Lorenzo's shoulders fell as I burst out into a fit of giggles. Mattheo winked at me, and I lost my breath to laughter as Lorenzo pouted.

"Wow, sorry. I didn't know I needed to be an expert in anamagus potions."

"Alright, I'm going to bed," Theo told us, standing. He stretched his arms over his head and caused his shirt to rise.

Toned, smooth skin peeked from under his shirt, and my laughter faded. I couldn't help tracing it with my eyes until the nagging feeling in the back of my mind laughed.

You're just the token fat friend, the voice taunted, Don't even bother.

"You're right," I smiled faintly, feeling my heart break, "We should all get to bed. It's been a long day," I gave them a thankful smile and clutched my goodies to my chest, "Thank you for everything."

They smiled back at me before we went our separate ways. I placed the potion ingredients in my closet and stripped before crawling into bed and wondering how long it would take to be worthy of them.

The next morning, I didn't get out of bed. My body was heavy, and my heart ached. When Twinky came to wake me, I asked her to alert my professors to my being ill.

Twinky puttered about for a few moments, ensuring I had everything I needed before leaving to do as I asked. My blankets stayed wrapped around me, and I nodded off to sleep, waiting for her return as a heavy knock startled me.

Shit, I had forgotten all about the boys. I crawled out of bed and wrapped my blanket around me tightly before leaving the comfort of my room to answer the main door.

Sure enough, there they stood, dressed and waiting for me as they had promised days prior.

"We thought you'd be ready by now?" Draco teased, fixing his tie with a glint in his eye.

"I'm not going to class today. I'm not feeling very well," I told them

His teasing glint was gone and replaced with worry, "Not well? Did you catch a cold in the forest?"

"I'm not sure. I just woke up feeling like absolute shite."

"Must have been the stress."

"Or when the hound attacked," Blaise added, "We'll take notes for you."

Draco looked me up and down, taking in my blanket and bedhead before turning to leave. He seemed upset, but I could only assume the worst without a reason. Blaise and Theo told me to rest, and Mattheo shot me a wink with a smile before leaving to follow them.

Looking slightly awkward, Lorenzo leaned forward against the doorframe and crossed his arms over his chest, "You're not lying, are you?"

My shoulders dropped. They did think of me as a liar, "No, I do feel awful, I swear."

He peered at me assessingly before nodding, "Alright," before he turned to leave, he stepped into my space, standing a few inches taller than me.

Forced to look up, I didn't notice as his hands slipped under the blanket wrapped around my middle. I stiffened as he touched my bare skin. His fingertips traced gently over the creases of skin on my back before settling over my hips as his cheek rested on my head.

"I hope you feel better. We'll stop back after classes," he leaned down toward my ear, not removing his hands from my bare skin, "I didn't take you for the kind of girl to sleep naked, Fey. I like it."

My mind reeled, and shocked, I spit out the first thing that came to mind, "Why?"

Lorenzo smiled wide, looking mischievous and handsome, "Because I like you."

He left me there with my mouth hanging open. My mind reeled, and the little voice in my head whispered that maybe we would be good together because he was a liar, too.

I slept for hours, fitfully waking off and on until finally, a soft knock hit my ears.

Afraid it was Lorenzo again, I peeked through a crack in the door and found Dumbledore standing in the hall with his back to my door.

He turned to face the crack slightly, "Ah, Miss Sterling. I heard you weren't feeling well, but according to our deal, you have obligations."

I groaned, "I'm sorry I missed class, Headmaster. I promise I'll continue on Monday. I just needed to rest today."

He waved away my words, "No, not that," he paused, "Yes, you will continue, but right now, you have a meeting to attend. Please get dressed. Preferably in the next fifteen minutes so we are not late."

"In my school robes?"

He shook his head, "No, your muggle clothes will do for where we're going. While my friend is a witch, we want you to blend in and feel comfortable."

Shutting the door, I followed instructions and dressed in my muggle clothes before making myself presentable. There was no way I would leave anywhere without looking at decent. This morning was a mistake. I wasn't in my right mind answering the door looking a mess.

When I felt comfortable, I entered the hall and joined Dumbledore, who was munching on a handful of lemon drops.

"Come now. We'll be leaving from Professor Snape's office so we can make it in time."

I followed as he led the way through the empty common room. Professor Snape wasn't in his office, but his fire was roaring. Given a handful of green floo powder, I followed through the floo, speaking clearly and trying not to cringe as it sucked me through time and space. It was uncomfortable, but fortunately, it only lasted briefly until we came out the other side in a neat and tidy office space lined with bookshelves and small green plants.

As we stepped out of the fireplace, a woman sat in an oversized, comfortable-looking chair, and a sizeable glowing lamp sat beside her on a small table. She glanced at us as we approached and smiled, "You must be Fey. Dumbledore has told me almost nothing about you at all," she laughed, "Please have a seat, and we can get started."

Dumbledore nodded at me, "Fey, this is Dr. Gemsworth. She is a graduate of Hogwarts. She left us and studied the muggle mind. You're safe here with her," he looked down at his watch, "I will be back in two hours. I must stop at the toffee shop down the street before I head to my next appointment."

With that, he stepped out of the office, leaving me and Dr. Gemsworth alone.

"I know that this can be disorienting. Am I correct in assuming he didn't tell you anything about me?"

I nodded, "He hasn't told me anything at all."

She was a small witch, much like myself, except shorter. She had short brown hair, dark brown eyes, and a smile that wanted to be infectious.

"Well, I did leave Hogwarts nearly fifteen years ago now. He was wrong, though, about one thing. I did not study the muggle mind," she grinned, "I just studied the mind. I have a doctorate in psychology and a master's in Mental Health counseling."

"So he brought me here because you can fix me."

She continued smiling, "Why don't we start with you telling me why you think you need fixing?"

I took a deep breath and explained it all. I left something out, but I told her more when she only listened and asked more questions. She was comforting as I explained what was going on in my mind. She didn't even flinch when I told her about the little voice taunting me or how I had been hiding using my abilities.

"You say you hate yourself?"

I nodded, looking down at the floor. I did. I couldn't even stand to look at myself in the mirror for longer than a few minutes.

"And you feel scared because you feel everyone is judging you?"

I nodded again.

"I want you to work on something for me until we meet again next week."

She reached into the table drawer beside her chair and took out her wand. It was made of dark wood, nearly a foot long, and was engraved.

She waved it and summoned a few things to where she sat. In her hand was a notebook, hardback with a light brown cover, "In this journal, I want you to write down a list of things about yourself that you like. Try to come up with one each day. It can be as simple as 'I like my laugh.'

"I can try…" It would be hard work.

"Don't worry, you can ask for help if needed."

"Second, I want you to rephrase your thinking. When that little voice pops up, I want you to respond to it."

"Talk to myself? Wouldn't that make me crazy?"

She laughed, "Not at all. If the little voice calls you a liar, really think it through. How did you lie? What did you lie about? Or simply respond as if someone else told you about the little voice being mean to them."

I was still confused, "So if the voice tells me, 'I'm just the fat friend'?"

"Then I want you to respond as if someone else is telling you about it. What would you say to them? What would you say if your friend said that to you?"

I scoffed, imagining Pansy saying that to me and, worse, her believing it, "I would tell them that the voice doesn't know what they're talking about. That their body is shaped that way because of genetics and history. They have nothing to be ashamed about…"

My voice died off slowly, her message sinking in as she smiled softly at me. I looked at her as my eyes began to burn.

"Thoughts like this take time and patience to rewire. We are going to start rewiring today. Can you work on this and write it all down until we meet next week?"

"Yes."