Gumball slowly got out of bed. His headache had prevented him from sleeping well that night. Despite the lovely dinner that Nicole had prepared for them, it couldn't seem to cease the headache that persisted that evening. He had tossed and turned all night in a cold sweat. As soon as the sun rose, he knew he had to get up. He quietly got out of bed, carefully taking steps to the door to prevent waking Nicole as she slept soundly on the other side of the bed. He made his way to the bathroom.
As he entered, he splashed cold water on his face. As he rubbed his temples, he let out a slight sigh of discomfort. He knew what the cause of all this was from. The strain of removing people that had been on his mind had taken its toll. Although Gumball had expected to find some relief doing so, perhaps he had underestimated the mental energy needed to do it, and the side affects that followed. He grasped the side of the bathroom counter with his hands and lowered his head. He knew he needed to rest; to recover his body and restore his energy, but he also knew he needed to keep pushing forward. He couldn't give up now. If he did, then he might not be able to pick up where he left off. That was something he couldn't afford to do. Not now...
Gumball took a quick shower before drying himself off and combing his matted hair. As he made his way back to their room, he walked over to Nicole's side. As he stopped, he gazed at her sleeping form. This seemed to be a common occurrence for him lately. He didn't seem to mind for several reasons; one being her beauty. Her calm and cute face seemed to ease his mind ever so slightly. As he continued to stare, he noticed her face start to twitch.
'She's dreaming again...' he thought.
'But about what?'
Gumball then leaned in, and kissed her forehead, causing her to twitch more. Her relaxed face then sprouted a smile from her lips as he pulled away. Gumball returned a smile back before making his way downstairs for breakfast. Today would be a long day...
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After Nicole had woken up shortly after, she joined him for breakfast. As she gazed up from her food and glanced happily at him, Gumball didn't seem to notice her and was staring blankly at his food as he ate it. Nicole could tell something was off about him. Something must be wrong.
"Sweetie, are you alright?"
Gumball seemed to jerk at hearing her voice, and looked up at her.
"O-oh, sorry. Yeah, I'm alright."
Nicole gave him a suspicious look before returning to her food. Something was definitely wrong. But what? Perhaps she would find out tonight. Gumball didn't seem to want to talk right now. So for now, she would wait.
After having finished their breakfast, Gumball started stretching with Nicole on the same pavement outside as yesterday in preparation for today's training lesson. He let out a quiet sigh. He knew today would be tough. His headache was increasing in pain and intensity. As he brought himself into a lotus position and closed his eyes, he stopped focusing on the pain, and focused on his form.
"I'm ready." Gumball said, straightening his back.
Nicole, being next to him and in the same position as him now, rubbed his shoulder gently.
"Alright. Now, today we will work on forgetting painful memories. Not just people this time. Memories contain both people and events. It will be harder to focus, but you must do it. Focus on letting the memories be destroyed, not just letting them remain. You must rid yourself of them. They will only cause you more pain..."
Nicole then tightened her grip on his shoulder.
"Gummypuss, I know this will take a toll on you. It did for me. You will feel...emotional at times, but don't be afraid to let it out. It will be okay. Just remember, I'm here for you. I'm not letting you go. Be brave."
Gumball nodded, before focusing, and letting his mind flow once again.
"Be brave..."
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Darkness. That's all he saw now. No sounds could be heard except his shallow breathing. Focusing a little harder, he felt the world around him change. Suddenly, he felt a pair of hands; one on each side of his shoulders. Then, he heard a voice.
"Gumball. I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't know it was that big of a deal to you."
Gumball felt his shivers throughout his body. That voice. He recognized it all too well. It was her. Penny. The girl he loved.
Gumball opened his eyes and saw her staring back at him. Her lovely eyes seemed to only burn his. As he glanced around him, he noticed he was at the mall. He then remembered what memory this was. Oh how he hated this memory...
He clenched both his fists tightly into a ball before turning back to meet her gaze. As she kept talking to him, he couldn't seem to focus on deciphering her words. They all meant nothing to him. SHE meant nothing to him, right?
As she continued speaking muffled words, Gumball felt tears welling up in his eyes. How could she have done that to him? How could she shatter his heart in only a few minutes of talking to him here? How? How...
How could she be so hateful? How could he have been set up like this? How...how could have been so naive? The more he thought this, the more he began to hate himself, rather then Penny. It was his fault for wanting to be with her, for making plans to ask her out, for wanting to date her. Gumball wanted to curl up into a ball now. He felt so weak...so pathetic.
"Be brave..."
Those words. Those words were from Nicole. Gumball opened his eyes. He had to be brave. For her. As he stared at Penny, he felt a third hand rest on his left shoulder. As he turned to look, he only saw Penny's, but he knew she was here for him. He would be brave, just like she had wanted him to be. After all, Nicole was the person who he loved now, not her. Not Penny.
Gumball focused on destroying this memory. He felt the mall around him start to shake, then crumble around him. Penny still was talking to him; seemingly oblivious to what was happening around them. Finally, as he focused harder, he felt her hands on him start to loosen. Soon enough, he didn't feel her hands on him at all. Eventually, he heard her half dazed words drown out into nothing but silence. Silence... that was all that remained now. He had destroyed the memory. She...was gone. The memory...was gone. All of it...was gone.
Gumball was now in the same black void as before.
A tiny smile formed on his face. He had defeated his toughest memory. As he focused again, he saw others he had to conquer. He briefly let them flow around him. He noticed they all seemed so small in comparison to the first. He saw his moments when he was bullied, to when he had missed out on being picked to be with his brother Darwin in soccer. Minuscule painful memories that he had frankly forgotten, be were still presented to him. He would tackle these with ease.
After a while of doing just that, he had returned to the void.
'I must be getting better at this since I erased them so quickly.' He thought.
Gumball felt a tinge of self confidence build in him. His mental capabilities were growing, he knew that, be even small and easy wins like that had made him feel powerful. Just then, his headache that he had almost entirely forgot about, started pulsing. Gumball rubbed his temples, but it only seemed to grow with intensity. Suddenly, he felt a sheering pain ripple through his mind. It felt like someone stabbing his brain. Gumball screamed in agony, clenching the sides of his head, but nothing was stopping the pain. He felt his body start to fall, spiraling down into a deep dark hole. As he fell, he kicked and flailed his body, wanting his head to stop being in pain. It felt unbearable. Then light appeared around him. He glanced down, and saw he was falling from the sky. There was a house below him. It...it was their home. Their new home. He felt his body phase through the roof and float over to...concrete?
As his headache finally subsided, he looked at his surroundings. He was on their porch. But...why? What memory could this be? As he looked around more, he then saw her. Nicole. She was close to him. She was speaking, but he couldn't understand it. He decided to focus harder to listen. Suddenly, the words started to make sense.
"Gumball...sweetie. We all have a point in our lives when we feel as though we are at our rock bottom. When nothing seems to matter anymore. When life doesn't seem worth living."
Gumball's eyes widened. He knew then why he was here. He knew why she was here too. It was because of what she had told him. How could he be so stupid? What memory could also have taken place here? Gumball turned away from her. He didn't want to hear this again. Not now. Not here. Just then, he heard her speak again.
"The first few months after you were gone, I...started hurting myself. The pain stopped me from grieving somewhat. It seemed to work...but I was blind to see what terrible damage it was really doing to me..."
Gumball felt his tears trail down his face now. He could hold them in. Nicole had gone through so much without him. Without anyone. He was amazed she hadn't been driven crazy from the isolation for so long. He knew he would have.
Gumball wiped his tears from his face. As he looked into Nicole's ever sorrowful eyes, he felt time around him stop. He could truly get lost in her gaze. Even with her puffy and reddened eyes, he saw such kindness and love within them. He leaned closer to her, and rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. He felt the world around him start to crumble and fade away. Soon enough, it was just them remaining. With a final act of love, he kissed her on the lips briefly before pulling away.
"I'm sorry Nicole...I'm so sorry..."
With that, she faded into nothing, and he was returned to the void. Gumball wanted out of this place. He wanted to be in Nicole's arms again. He wanted to hug her. To kiss her. He needed to be there for her again.
As Gumball focused on returning to her, he felt something blocking his return. As he focused on what was stopping him, he saw a very small single memory just out of reach. As he drew himself nearer to it, he didn't seem to recognize it. As he touched it, he felt it engulf him. He felt his body shrink down and saw his eyesight start to haze over. What was this? Was he...a baby again?
As he saw the world around him come into view, he noticed he was in their old home again. He was in the living room, or more specifically in a playpen. Gumball then heard something. It sounded like it was coming from the kitchen. Gumball focused. The mumbled sounds soon became words to him. But not just any words; they were angry ones. It sounded like two people shouting at each other, as though an argument was taking place. Perhaps it was. Just then, Nicole walked out of the kitchen, followed by a very angry looking Richard.
"It's not that hard Richard. Learning to control your food binges is something that is manageable!"
"You don't understand Nicole! I'm addicted to it! You don't think I've tried to kick it?! It's so accessible to me. The flavor, the salt, the way it tickles my brain... and you took that away from me!"
"Richard..." Nicole wearily spoke, before collecting herself enough to continue.
"You need help. You aren't behaving right..."
Richard scoffed.
"Like you're the one to talk. You don't think that I haven't witnessed your little 'tantrums' before? huh? DO YOU?! I've seen what a mess you can make when you throw them. If anything, YOU are the one who needs help."
"Richard, the only reason I snapped was because you broke me over my limit! I've worked countless hours to provide for us, only to discover you spent all our money on food binges! I...I can't stand it anymore!"
"Then maybe you should do something about it. Go ahead! Deal with the problem!"
Richard outstretched his arms from his sides.
"I said go ahead! I hear what you whisper to yourself when you think I'm not around. How you said you wanted to 'put me down'. Well if you do, I won't resist. I'm sick of this godforsaken body Nicole. I hate it! Why don't you just kill me..."
Nicole had tears running down her cheeks.
"Richard. Please...don't say that." She wept.
"I said DO IT!"
With that, he lunged himself towards her. Nicole quickly pulled his arms behind his back and pinned him to the ground.
"Richard. Stop this..."
"NO! I said kill me Nicole. KILL ME!" He yelled manically.
"I...I can't."
"Why? Why can't you?..."
Nicole glanced up towards Gumball, panic and fear filled her face. She then softened her grip. Richard took advantage of this and threw her aside. He then got up to his feet. Nicole sat on her knees and covered her face in order to slow her tears. Richard just stood there, panting and looking down at her.
"God you're so pathetic! This one time I wanted to die by your hands and you couldn't even do that..."
Richard brought his hand back, and slapped the side of her face hard. Nicole flinched and covered her cheek.
"I hate you...you BITCH!" He yelled one final time, before turning to head upstairs.
As he made his way through the living room, he glanced over towards baby Gumball. His cold and hatred filled eyes glared back at him as he continued on his way.
"I can't believe she left him down here during this..." Richard muttered under his breath as he proceeded up the steps.
Gumball then turned his attention towards his mother. She hadn't moved. She was in the same position as before; still holding her cheek. He then felt his body fill with sadness. He was...crying. He was crying like a baby. His soft crying alerted Nicole, as she turned to face him. Her ears perked up and her eyes widened. Quickly she rushed over to him, pulling him out of the playpen and cradled him in her arms. As Gumball looked at her closely, he noticed several scratches on her cheek, and they were starting to bleed. Despite this, Nicole seemed to pay little attention to herself and focused solely on Gumball now. She gently shushed him, and started to rock her body from side to side, lulling him to a sense of calm again.
"It's alright my Gummypuss. Shhh, It's alright. I'm sorry you had to see that. Me and daddy were angry at each other. I may not be sure if I love daddy, but remember Gumball...I will always love you..."
I will always love you.
Gumball closed his eyes. He focused and felt the world around them start to fade and collapse. As he was about to focus on letting her go...he stopped. He opened his eyes one final time to see hers. Unlike Richards cold and dead eyes, hers was full of hope, love and kindness. But through the very motherly gaze, he saw a hint of sorrow and desperation.
'No. I'm not letting this one go...' He thought.
Nicole then seemed to fade into the void. This memory would be part of his thoughts for a very long time. How could his father do that to her? How dare he...
Gumball then thought of Nicole. He wanted to feel her embrace again. No, he NEEDED to. With that, he focused the hardest he could, and felt the world around him turn to normal again.
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Gumball opened his eyes. His shallow and steady breath became an uneven one. He was back. He was awake. As he wiggled his toes and fingers to bring them back to sensation, he glanced over towards Nicole. She was still next to him, meditating. Gumball felt tears run down his face. Remembering such a tragic memory of Nicole, and what happened to her had taken its toll on him. The sense of helplessness he had felt from being in the baby's form was so hard on him. The desire to embrace her with all the love in the world was denied by his feeble body...
Gumball closed his eyes again, trying to steady his breath again. He needed to let that go; for now at least. He wasn't in the past anymore. He was here now, in the present. He was here...with Nicole.
Nicole...
Gumball opened his eyes and looked over towards Nicole. He then scooted closer to her, and wrapped her in the warmest and most loving hug he could muster. Nicole seemed to lose all focus then, and let out a surprised 'oh' sound, before returning his hug.
"Gumball! I see you are back. Did you destroy the memories that were hurting you?"
Gumball pulled back from the hug, and looked into her curious eyes with his own, very tired and teary eyes. Just then, he gave her a small, yet very warm smile.
"Yes...heh...I did. I actually did it..."
"Well done sweetie. Well done..."
With that, Nicole kissed his forehead. As Nicole pulled back, she saw him still looking at her funny. Then, suddenly, he reached out his hand and rested it gently on her cheek. He rubbed it with such...sincerity. But...why?
"Gumball? What's wrong?"
He then seemed to snap out of his half daze like state.
"Oh. Sorry Nicole. I just..." he said, trailing off.
"Gummypuss, it's alright. You can tell me."
Gumball then seemed to contemplate for a moment, before responding.
"I'll tell you later, okay?"
Nicole let out a small sigh, before nodding in agreement.
"Alright."
Gumball then swiftly pulled her into a very loving kiss, something she had not been expecting from him at that moment. She loosened her body and gave into the kiss. For some reason, this kiss seemed different. It seemed so...genuine. Like their kiss they shared during their dates. It was like he was putting his deep emotions into the kiss itself. It felt good to her. Very good.
Gumball pulled back now, and caught his breath. He was totally exhausted now. He needed rest. Luckily for him, his headache had seemed to have ceased for now, despite the mental strain. But he knew it wouldn't be long until it returned. He just knew it. With shaky legs, he stood up. Nicole aided him stand straight after he almost fell to the ground.
"Let's get you inside to rest. You need it." She said lovingly.
Gumball then somewhat squeezed her hand.
"Can you join me? I don't want to sleep alone."
Nicole seemed confused by that request, but decided it wouldn't hurt to do so. Not after what he had just been through.
"Okay, I'll do that."
Gumball gave her a tired but genuine smile again, before they both entered the house.