Hello!

I just wanted to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for the kind words of encouragement. It means a lot to me and I am grateful for everyone's support.

So THANK YOU

Swing, swing, block, push back. Push forward, swing, swing, block, push back.

—-

Rukia did a hundred reps of various beginner drills every morning before reporting for duty. She knew that everything went back to the basics. Her comrades were strong, all of them were in a different league from her. They didn't need to run the beginner drills, they'd rather practice their more advanced powerful movies. They didn't need to perfect basic combat skills, their strength always overcompensated for the basic skills they never perfected.

Rukia was not as privileged, no amount of training will ever help her reach her comrades. But that never discouraged her.

Because what she lacked in strength, she made up for in discipline. She compensated for her lack of sheer power with tactical intelligence. Never one to rush into a fight and hope for the best, Rukia observed till she understood her opponent's attacks, fighting style, strengths, and weaknesses. Every move she made was smart, and with purposeful.

She was nothing like her orange-haired counterpart.

Swing, swing, block, stumble. The ebb and flow of her training was halted as her mind drifted to Ichigo.

*Flashback*

Rukia stared at Ichigo's back until he was out of sight. Baffled. He just told her how important their friendship was and how he never wanted to lose her, but as soon as he thought she was in an intimate relationship with Grimmjow it felt like he was taking it all back. She gave Grimmjow a side eye before fuming at him for what he chose to contribute to the conversation.

"Helpful. Real helpful Grimm, thank you so much for clearing up that misunderstanding!" He just raised an eyebrow at him. Groaning she dropped her voice low and did her best Grimmjow impersonation to show him all the viable options he could have chosen from.

"'What the fuck!? Why would you think that? You can't be fucking serious? Calm the fuck down kid, it's not like that! That's fucking ridiculous! Don't be fucking stupid!'" he chuckled at her very terrible attempts to sound like him. "Anything would have been better than what you said!".

"Eh, he'll figure it out" lifting an arm up to stretch as he turned to face her. "Its not like you were sayin shit".

"I didn't know what to say I was shocked! I've never been accused of something so crude!" She huffed.

"Crude? He accused you of fucking, not murder. No reason to lose your shit".

"….."

"Ok, so he's pissed because what? It wasn't with him?"

Rukia rolled her eyes at his reasoning. Humans were more complex than that. She saw a mischievous grin on Grimmjow's face before he spoke.

"I mean, I'm flattered. But, I'd rather gouge out my own eyes".

She couldn't help but laugh until there were tears in her eyes. When was the last time she laughed like this? Her laugh was contagious and before he knew it, he was laughing.

*End Flashback*

This accusation was uncomfortable for Rukia because she had never been intimate with a man before. Hell, she had never even kissed a man. She grew up on the streets fighting to survive, not really a good time to be swiping looking for her Prince Charming. She was a soldier, which commanded all her focus. Besides. No one has ever looked at her as a woman, or treated her like a woman. She couldn't blame them though.

Her hands, they were calloused, scarred, rough. They were only capable of holding a sword, not the hand of someone she loved. That wasn't meant for her. Being loved, cherished, and adored was for other women.

The only hand she had ever wanted was Kaien's. And he was gone, because of her.

"You fightin a ghost or something?" Rukia looked back at her blue haired roomie.

"It's called training. Ever heard of it?".

"Can't say that I have, looks boring as fuck. Let's fight instead!" Always eager for a battle this one. She scowled in annoyance. They have spared a countless number of times, it seemed like the only thing we ever wanted to do. H was like an energizer bunny always ready to go at a moment's notice.

"No. I am still recovering from the last time we 'sparred'" if you could even call it that, more like the last time Rukia had to fight for her life and barely survived. He started circling her like a panther stalking it's prey, with a mischievous grin.

"I mean it Grimm! Don't you dare!" Her eyes, like daggers, were sending promises of dismemberment if he proceeded on his current course of action. He took a step closer to her. She took a few steps back.

"Seriously, fuck off!"

It was too late. He disappeared from her sight and in a split second he stood behind her with a hand around her neck, his fingers fanned out on her throat and jaw. His hot breath against her ear. In a husky deep voice, a challenge was made.

"Make me"

Grimmjow was goading her. Didn't he know he was dealing with the Rukia Kuchiki? The sophisticated noblewoman, the levelheaded soldier, she was far too intelligent to give in to something so immature. She wouldn't reward bad behavior. She let out a deep sigh, reached both hands up to gently pry his hand from her throat.

"You sound like a pouty child when yo-" she stopped talking mid-sentence. With incredible speed she moved the hands gripping his to his wrist, roughly grabbing hold and with all her strength pushed back into him. Losing his balance for a split second, one foot barely lifted off the ground, she saw her opening. Ramming her right shoulder back into his chest whilst simultaneously pulling his arm forward, she tossed him over her shoulder and slammed him to the ground.

He couldn't believe it. He let his guard down assuming she was going to scold him further and used the element of surprise to her advantage. Laying on his back staring at the sky, he couldn't believe that just happened. That he let that happen. He was losing his touch. The view of the sky was obstructed by his perpetrator hovering over him with a shit eating grin.

Under normal circumstances he would be livid. But, that wasn't the case. There was no way she could have done that. It just didn't make sense at all. He was stronger than her in every way. Rather than feel humiliated that someone like her could bring him to the ground, he felt humbled.

Rukia extended her hand to help him up. He took a moment to look at it. Her hands told the story of the hardships that she endured. They told him that she has been a fighter all her life. That didn't make sense. His eyes drifted from her hand to her eyes.

They radiated things that he couldn't even comprehend, warm things. These were not the eyes of a fighter, hardened by battle. They were gentle and bore an innocence that could be compared to a small child that believed there was still good in the world.

"Why?"

With a deep sigh she sat on the ground next to him. This was the second time he asked her this question, she had no choice but to answer him honestly.

"When I first saw you in the alley, I just saw a hollow filled with hate and capable of cruelty. Then I went back for you and saw a man who had given up" His fists tightened at the memory of his cowardliness.

"You looked like a man filled with regret. It caught me off guard when my heart ached for you. For how much you must have suffered that make you so cruel. For the love and kindness that you probably never experience. No man would have readily accepted their death, unless they had no reason to be alive. I knew you weren't going to fight for yourself, so I decided I would fight for you. For the part of you that was so human. I wanted to protect it."

She gently touched his forearm, a request for him to look at her. So, he did.

"You are more than the sum of your sins. You are so much more. I know it's difficult to believe that. Especially when everyone is telling you otherwise, but that doesn't make it any less true. You are worthy of this second chance you were given, it's not something you have to earn. So, until you get that through your thick stupid skull. I'm afraid you're stuck with me" she playfully bumped him with her shoulder, waiting for him to respond.

He didn't. Instead he stood up and looked down at her with an expression she couldn't read.

His mind was racing, understanding but not believing what she said. She saw something good in him. She saw something good in HIM. Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez.

She raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to say something. Anything.

"Fuck are you going on about? I was asking why you threw me. Not whatever bullshit you were yammering about" Okay. Maybe not just ANYTHING. She responded with a blank stare.

"It was fucking rude, is what it was. A dirty fucking move" staring at his shoulders she let out deep sigh and rolled her eyes. So typical of him to run from a potentially genuine, vulnerable conversation as if it was the plague. That man needed therapy.

She let a small smile escape for a second before running after him. As weird, ridiculous, and dumb as it sounds, she found him to be endearing.

—-

Some considerations to keep in mind while you read the story:

Grimmjow's self worth and identity are tied to his strength. Which is understandable because in Hueco Mundo value was directly related to strength. He believes he will reach Segunda Etapa once he is 'strong enough'. But, as we know. it takes more than strength. If that were the case why is Ulquiorra the only one to reach it? He needs something more, and has some growing to do. This is a slow burn. Grimmjow isn't going to just wake up fully capable of comprehending his feelings and communicating them. He's basically feral. Once he develops those skills, he can reach the next level.

"It's only when you have lost everything, that you are free to do anything" -Tyler Durden, Fight Club. Grimmjow is acting very out of character and for a very good reason. He thought he was going to die, and there wasn't a single moment of his life worth recalling. Nothing. He didn't like that feeling. With this second chance at life he knows he wants it to be different but has no idea what that looks like. The only thing he does know, is that he likes the way Rukia makes him feel.

Grimmjow does whatever Grimmjow wants to do. He's learned that he likes being physically close to Rukia, so he's going to seek out her touch or initiate touch. Personal space isn't a thing to him.

Rukia isn't much better. None of the men in her entire life have ever tried to be close to her in the way that Grimmjow has. The intimate moments he initiates makes her feel desired, something shes not familiar with. Similar to to Grimmjow, she likes how he makes her feel but she doesn't understand it.

Bottom line. They provide a level of comfort for each other that they have never experienced before. They unconditionally care for each other. Rukia uncharacteristically lost her shit and attacked him out of anger, but he didn't leave her. Grimmjow tried to kill her, and she didn't leave him. Them at their worst, was not enough to scare the other away.

Please let me know your thoughts! Your insight is always appreciated