J
I was kissing Lisa. Finally. After years her lips were crashing against mine. My heart thundered in my chest, racing manically. It always did with Taehyung too, but that was with fear, this was joy, love, hope for the future.
Her hands fisted my hair, anchoring our lips together. She controlled everything; she always had, and I let her. All I wanted to do was feel, let her take over my heart and body again.
She was right. She never really left me, never left my mind or my body.
"Fuck, Jennie," she cursed against my mouth before her tongue worked against mine. There weren't enough words to describe what I felt, how she made me feel. Keeping our lips pushed together, she laid me down in the bed, settling on top of me. My emotions threatened to overtake me, but I tried to keep control.
Lisa. This was Lisa. She would never hurt me. My protector. My love.
"I'm right here, babe," she mumbled against my lips. Sinking into the mattress, I spread my legs, letting her settle between them.
Lisa was never about taking slow. Usually she would already have me naked, writhing beneath her, mouth on me, fingers inside me, touching me everywhere she could. She was going slow, too slow.
"More," I whispered. "Please, Lisa, more."
She silenced me with another kiss, tongue working against my own, taking, consuming, kissing me like she never forgot what each corner of my mouth tasted like, like she's making sure it's still the same.
"Fuck, I missed you," she admitted, hands running down my body. It was different from the last time she touched me like this. Her hands roamed over the new, softer, curves, taking her time to explore each one. Each touch of her hands reminded me about a time before, when I thought no one else would ever touch me, when the only thing in the world that existed was us.
"I missed you too," I breathed against her lips.
As if those words were all it took to flip the switch, something inside Lisa snapped, and she growled against me, ripping my clothes from my body–which were actually her clothes–the club t-shirt torn right down the middle, baring my breasts to her. She didn't stop there, tearing the boxers down my legs, leaving me completely naked for her.
"Fuck," she grunted, jade eyes raking up and down the exposed contours of my body. "You're perfect. Fucking perfect, Jennie. You hear me, babe?"
"Yes," I panted. "Yes, yes, I hear you."
Her hands roamed over me, tracing lightly, digging in where she could, mixing the touches, building me up with sensation after sensation. Lips moving down my body, she trailed sloppy kisses down my chest.
Even though I begged for this, I was worried how I would react, that I'd panic at the touch. But this was different. Lisa worshiped me with every touch, poured all the love she had for me into it. With Taehyung, I was a hole–three of them–for him to use. He never touched, never loved, never cared to wrap his mouth around my nipples.
Lisa's mouth closed around me, sucking. My back bowed and I cried out loud. It'd been so long since I was touched like this, years since I'd felt any type of pleasure.
"Stay with me, babe," she whispered, switching sides. "Who's touching this body?"
"Lisa. My Lisa."
"Good girl," she praised. Lips wrapped around my nipple again, her big, calloused hand slid down my body, leaving a trail of sparks as she moved lower and lower, over the swell of my stomach that never went away after having Holden, lower still until her hand cupped my pussy.
My legs spread wider, giving her more room to work against me. "Dripping," she mumbled and then bit down on my nipple. I cried out again, getting lost in the sensations of her.
My body trembled beneath her. I held my breath, unable to breathe.
"Fuck," she cursed, fingers spreading me open, finding me soaking wet for her. I haven't gotten wet for sex in years, not since Lisa. Never since Lisa.
"More," I pleaded.
"Eyes on me, babe. Look at me while I touch you."
I forced my eyes open, unafraid of what I'd see, but the image of her between my legs, dark hair peeking out, mouth open as she descended on me. She kept her eyes on mine, forcing me to hold her while she wrapped her lips around my clit, pulling it into her mouth. Her execution was perfect, playing me like she still had every inch of my body memorized, sliding two fingers into me at the same time.
"Yes!"
Lisa groaned against me, fingers curling inside me, licking and sucking my clit. It was like my body didn't know how to react to the pleasure anymore, like it had been so long since I'd felt any, any sort of goodness, but I was already on the verge of exploding. I wasn't sure if it was Lisa, or the moment finally having her again after so long, but it was the best thing I'd ever felt in my life.
"Missed this pussy every goddamn day," she whispered. She pulled her fingers from me, sliding them up to my clit while her tongue swept through me, to my entrance, slipping it inside me. My legs wrapped around her head anchoring her to me, never wanting to let her come up for air. It seemed she didn't want to; she pulled her fingers from me, and wrapped her hands around me while her tongue worked against my clit.
My body thrashed on the bed, a string of expletives flying from my mouth, as my orgasm built. "I'm so close," I cried.
She didn't respond with words, only doing exactly what she was doing, tempo, pressure. I was lost to her. "Lisa," I cried, finally coming. She groaned against me, fingers digging into my thighs, working her tongue against me slower until I came down.
"Goddamn, I missed this," she whispered. "Haven't eaten a pussy in six fucking years, Jennie."
"What?" I asked, stuttering through the question, sitting on my elbows to look at her. I watched as she licked the remnants of my orgasm from her mouth, eyes sparkling.
Instead of answering, she climbed up my body, only pulling her pants down enough to free herself, shoving my legs to my ears, slamming inside me in one motion.
"Oh god!" she was so big, stretching me so much.
"Couldn't even fucking think about touching anyone who wasn't you for years," she said. She was unmoving, filling me to the hilt, as far inside me as she could get. My breath left me in short pants. Looking up at her above me, I wanted to cry. She waited for me. Fuck, she waited for me.
"Nothing?" I asked, unable to believe it. "No one?"
"Just head," she admitted, pulling out and slipping back in. "And only the last months. I couldn't. Fuck, babe, I couldn't."
Tears fell down my cheeks. Lisa's eyes flashed with her own emotion.
"Don't stop," I whispered. "Fuck me, please!"
Pulling out to the tip, she slammed herself back inside me. The stretch was painful, but I welcomed it, wanting everything she had to give.
"Never fucking letting you go again," she growled. "Don't even fucking think about walking out of here again."
"Don't. I won't. I'm yours."
Lisa knew exactly how to touch me, how to move her hips to hit the perfect spots inside me. Even though it'd been years since she touched me, she knew exactly how to move.
There were no more words, just the sounds of our combined pleasure, body against body, souls crashing into each other after too long apart.
"Fuck," I whined.
"Tell me what you need, babe."
"The knife," I pleaded. "I need it."
"You're sure?" she asked, stilling inside me. She looked down at me, concern in her eyes, concern that only made me love her more than I thought I already did.
"Yes," I breathed. "I'm yours again."
"Even without the blade, you're mine. You've always been mine, Jennie."
"Don't make me beg, Lisa, please."
With a groan, she pulled out of me, and I felt empty without her, desperate to have her fill me up again. I watched as she pulled her shirt over her head, finally revealing those long, lean muscles to me. She was so much bigger than the last time I had her, not that lanky kid who left me behind, and so many more tattoos. The black and gray covering her skin was never ending, intricate designs staring back at me. I wanted to take my time to memorize each one, to be able to draw them from memory in case I ever lost her again.
Before the thought could spiral, Lisa was back on the bed, completely naked, knife in her hand.
"You're sure?" she asked again.
"Yes."
Her eyes darkened, jaw ticking while she looked down at me. "Hands on the headboard, and don't you dare move them," she whispered dangerously.
I did exactly as she said, listening to her commands easily, just like I always did, like I always would.
"Fuck," she cursed.
Her touch was teasing as she ran the sharp point of the blade between the valley of my breasts, down my stomach. I quivered beneath it, more turned on than I'd ever been.
"You always did bleed so pretty," she murmured. With those words, she flicked the knife, letting me feel the sting and the warmth of the trickle of blood coming from my stomach. "Fuck, Jennie, you're so goddamn beautiful. Perfect for me."
My hands dug into the headboard, turning painful from the force of the grip, but I wasn't going to let go, not until she told me I could.
Another flick of the blade on the opposite side. More blood. A moan tore through me, the release I needed. I needed so much more.
"More," I pleaded. "Don't stop, Lisa."
She groaned, and I watched her sit back on her heels. Her fingers ran through the blood, bringing it to her mouth. My pussy quivered as I watched her lick my blood from her fingers. With a groan, she brought her mouth to the line of it, licking, adding to the sting before I felt the pleasure.
I wanted desperately to let go of the headboard, but I knew it would make her stop.
"Bend your knees, let them fall open."
I did what she said immediately, no hesitation. I felt vulnerable, but safe and protected at the same time. Unlike with Taehyung, I knew she would never hurt me.
I watched her flip the blade, grabbing where the knife met the handle. Eyes locked on mine, she ran the handle up my pussy, soaking it in my wetness.
My eyes fluttered closed and she stopped, waiting for me to open them. She didn't even have to tell me to; I knew exactly what she wanted.
"Good girl," she murmured.
The handle slipped easily through me, and then she pushed it inside making my mouth fall open. I never knew how much I would like this, not before Lisa, but I trusted her completely, still do, and knowing she's using a knife to bring me pleasure, something that's usually synonymous with pain, made me wetter for her.
"Fuck, you look so pretty taking a knife in this cunt," she murmured, eyes hazy, losing herself in the pleasure of pleasuring me.
"Please," I whispered, digging my hands in more so I didn't release them.
"What do you need?" she asked even though she knew the answer.
"You."
The grin she gave me was sinister, dark, brooding, deadly. She was so powerful, and I knew she had as much a drive to kill as she did for healing. I knew all of her demons, had known them since the moment we met, recognized the brokenness in her soul.
My pussy fluttered, clenching on nothing as she pulled the blade from me and brought it to her mouth, licking it clean.
"Oh, god."
Lisa set the blade on the table next to her bed, and then she was inside me again, my thighs wrapped around her hips, thrusting wildly inside me. Her rhythm was perfect, deep and forceful, building my pleasure higher and higher with every thrust.
"Fuck, I missed you," she reminded me again. "Don't ever make me miss you again."
"Never," I whispered. "Keep me."
Her agreement was a kiss to my lips, kissing me in the same rhythm she fucked me in while I met her thrust for thrust, tilting my hips, moaning into her mouth.
"I'm gonna come again," I cried, breaking the kiss.
"Come for me so I can fill up this cunt. Gonna mark you every day for the rest of your fucking life so you never forget you belong to me."
"I never forgot," I promised. "I've always belonged to you."
"Always fucking will. Now come!"
The demand in her voice, combined with the promise, the way her cock brushed against all the right places with every thrust, had me coming, seeing stars as I moaned incoherently for her.
I felt her slam inside me, holding herself there while she released inside me, claiming me again for the first time in far too long.
After she finished, she stayed inside me, brown eyes glowing as she planted soft, delicate kisses all over me.
"Lisa," I whispered.
"Yeah?"
"Put them back."
"Put what back?" she asked, brows furrowed in confusion.
"Your initials. Put them back."
"Okay," she agreed easily.
I whimpered as she pulled out of me, the sound morphing into a moan when she kissed down my body, loving every inch of me until she kissed my pussy, once, twice, and then finally pulled away.
When she settled between my thighs again, she had the blade in her hand. "Here?" she asked, running the tip across the flesh of my thigh, directly opposite where Taehyung had dug her initials off me the first time.
"Yes," I breathed, opening my legs.
"Relax for me," she whispered.
I hissed as the blade cut. The rest of the marks she left when she cut me never scared, never going deep enough, just enough to make me bleed for her, add pain to the pleasure. This hurt.
"Good girl," she whispered. I felt the tail of the 'L' sliding down as my fingers dug into the sheets, trying to keep the cries of pain low. The 'P', quick, fast, and deep and she was done. There would be a blood stain on her sheets. I could feel it dripping down my thigh. The 'M' was the same as the 'P' as far as pain and movement against my skin went, but when she finished, I wished she'd start over, desperate for it.
"So damn pretty," she whispered, blowing breath over the fresh cuts. "Stay here," she whispered.
"Where are you going?"
"I just need to check on the kids. I'll be right back." If I thought I couldn't love her more, I was wrong. Her concern for my kids was more than their own father ever showed them. I watched her walk naked to the door, opened it, leaned her head out, satisfied with what she saw. "Still sleeping," she whispered.
This time, she didn't close the door, but left it open, coming back to bed dressed in boxers, a new t-shirt for me. And a damp wash cloth. Lovingly, she cleaned my pussy, and then the blood from my thigh.
Tears filled my eyes, the mix of emotions overwhelming. They only stopped when Lisa dragged me against her body, tucked me into her side, kissed my head and whispered, "You're safe, now, babe. So are your kids. Sleep."