J
I knew their meeting would take a while, but sitting with the other old ladies isn't enough of a distraction. I'm fidgeting and anxious.
When Lisa pulled me into the meeting room, my heart raced out of my chest with panic. I knew she would never hurt me, knew she trusted me completely, but with Taehyung, if anyone, even one of the women got pulled out of the common area and into the meeting room, chances were they weren't making it out alive. I'd seen it enough times to know.
Walking into that room, with all the brothers' eyes on me, the way they stared, even being anchored to Lisa made me nearly faint. It wouldn't have been the first time, just the first time since I got here.
Then, Lisa sat me right on her lap, wrapped her arms around me, staked her claim on me in front of all of them. Sure, she'd fucked me in front of all of them, too, claimed me as her old lady in the middle of the crowded club, but it still felt different. Realer. Purer. More permanent.
There was no denying what I felt for Lisa was perpetual. I hadn't been hers in years–not really. Which was contradictory because the truth was also I'd always been her. You could go round and round the meanings, and interpretations of the last years of our lives and still not figure it out. That wasn't what was important anyway.
"It's gonna be fine," Rachel said, pulling me from my own mind.
"I know," I replied, offering the queen a soft nod of my head.
"They won't go in without a solid plan," Tiffany said. "Nickhun would never let them."
"Yeah," Brenda said. "They all have too much worth coming home for to do something reckless without having an escape plan."
Both of them were pregnant. Most of the guys had old ladies and lots of reasons to come home, but that didn't mean they could control everything. Lisa told me about Diesel, about his betrayal, how that got Spade killed.
There didn't seem to be a rat right now, but I had no idea how to trust anyone in this club house other than Lisa, even the women surrounding me. It definitely felt like I found my tribe, but even if that was the case, it was going to take some time for trust to develop. For them towards me too.
"We've all been in church," Charlie says casually.
"Seriously?" I ask, completely surprised. That was not a woman's place with Taehyung.
"Oh absolutely," Carrie quipped.
If anyone at this table didn't fit the stereotypical biker wife role, it was her. It had nothing to do with her size, but she looked so…sweet. She didn't look like she could hurt a fly, like if another club rolled up for war, she'd have a plate of cookies ready to greet them. But looks could be deceiving. I knew she worked really closely with Doc as her nurse, which meant she must have seen some shit, and be good in a crisis. Had to be with these guys around. She seemed so genuine. Not that the other women surrounding me didn't, but not in the same way.
"We can give you the lowdown on all the drama," Marie said.
"All right, I'll take it," I said with a laugh.
"This one," Marie continued, pointing at Rachel. "Ex was a runaway cop who got in bed with the cartel." My mouth fell open while Rachel just shrugged, not embarrassed and unashamed. "That one," Marie said, pointing her finger at Charlie. "Who by the way, her ex and Rachel's had the same damn name, but were somehow different men."
Charlie cut her off with a laugh. All these things sounded pretty heavy and traumatic. How long had it been since they could laugh about it now?
"Her ex was a prospect. And when Jaehyun claimed her–ten minutes after meeting here–right in that booth over there." My mouth fell open. Jesus.
"Worth it," Charlie said, taking a sip of her drink.
"Then Jaehyun's ex showed up, and plotted with Charlie's ex. It was a whole thing. It involved a lot of betrayal, and honestly, I don't really understand how it all went down, but he's gone."
Gone meant dead.
"Then there's that one," she said pointing at Carrie. Carrie looked down, hiding her red cheeks behind her hair. "She made Ten work for it. Like seriously. Way more than Rachel and Charlie did." Carrie lifted her head up, smiling. "Then her ex showed up."
"Why's it always the ex?" I ask myself.
"Who knows?" Brenda asks. "It wasn't mine though. I'm after Carrie."
I laugh at her, at least there was one person without a crazy ex here.
"Oh, but she was Jaehyun's fuck buddy," Megan chimed in. She was usually quiet so that piece of very interesting gossip caught me by surprise.
"We're good," Charlie said, to me, shaking her head. She tossed a wink at Brenda.
My god I needed a fucking white board and some red string to figure out what the hell was going on here.
"Anyway, Carrie's ex showed up, tried to start shit. Long story short, he's gone too. And when he went, he was missing his favorite tool."
"Tool?" I asked abruptly. They all just stared at me. My brows furrowed while I tried to figure out what they meant. "Ooohhhhh," I said, mouth falling open. They cut off his cock. I didn't need to ask what he did to Carrie to deserve that.
Hopefully they'd let me do the same to Taehyung before they sent him to hell.
"Brenda and Lucas's drama wasn't from her, but from his family," Marie said, pulling me back into the stories about all the women at the table. I knew Marie and Megan before, but not well since Lisa and I were younger, and they were soul suckers.
"Let me guess," I chimed in. "Gone?"
"Gone," Brenda said.
"Then before Tiffany showed up, the hot new couple was Eunwoo and Miyeon."
"Oh, right," I said. "I'd seen them all over each other a few times. They're cute as hell."
"It's so gross," Rachel said. "They're stupid in love."
"I mean, yeah but so are all of you," I point out. "True," Charlie said. "But they don't have to separate when they go out on missions, neither one of them gets left behind."
"Seokmin doesn't let them be on the same team when they go out though," Rachel told us. "Which honestly might be worse. Could you imagine being out on a mission and having to be in a separate team from your man? I'd rather stay behind."
We all contemplated her words before nodding and murmuring our agreement.
"Either way, they're cute as hell," Brenda said.
They really were.
"Then Tiffany showed up," Marie said. "She's the literal baby. Nickhun fell for her when she was nineteen."
"Oh damn."
Tiffany rolled her eyes, obviously used to the teasing they were giving her.
"And she showed up with his kid he didn't know he had."
"Holy shit."
"Yeah, yeah," Tiffany chided. "Get on with it."
"Her drama wasn't with an ex, but some mercenaries who were after her. She's the daughter of a former Mexican president."
The tea here was piping hot.
And I was suddenly feeling mildly better about my situation.
"And then you showed up," Marie finished. "So, whatever happens, whatever is going to happen with Taehyung, we've probably been there. We've been on lockdown too many times to count."
"I just pray the next one to show up doesn't have a crazy ex," Rachel said. "I've had enough of the crazy ex drama."
"So have I," I deadpan. Her face sobers, and then she's laughing, the rest of them joining in.
"Oh, there's definitely gonna be an ex," Carrie said. "There's always an ex."
"Doesn't mean there needs to be drama," Megan added.
"True," I murmured.
"Who's gonna be the next to fall?" Marie asked with a smirk on her face.
"Joshua," Carrie said quickly.
"He needs an old lady," Rachel added. "Emphasis on the old."
Everyone around me laughed, but I missed the joke. "I don't get it?"
"Joshua has a thing for the old ladies," Charlie told me. "He's literally a baby. Even the new prospects are older than him and Wonwoo. They're babies, and Joshua loves all of us. He needs an older woman to guide him."
"Interesting," I tutted.
"Wonwoo needs one too," Brenda said.
"Wonwoo will get eaten alive," Charlie said. "He's so innocent."
"Really?" I asked. He didn't exactly look innocent. Sure, all the brothers were covered head to toe in tattoos, but Wonwoo's somehow seemed like more. Maybe it was that quiet thing he had going on, or his baby face, one of the only brothers without any facial hair.
"That choir boy look?" Charlie said. "It's real. He ran away from home. His dad is a preacher somewhere in Oklahoma or something."
"I thought it was Texas," Carrie said.
"Regardless, he didn't even lose his virginity until recently, and I don't think he's had sex since then."
"Wow," I whispered.
"He's got no interest in the soul suckers either," Megan said. It seemed she was one of the only old ladies who kind of got around with the girls who hung around fucking the single brothers in exchange for a place to live and protection from whatever it was they were running from.
"Is he gay too?" I asked.
"We all thought for a while that he was the one Eunwoo was with," Rachel said.
"And then Eunwoo said we weren't allowed to ask about his sexuality."
"I mean, yeah, probably a fair thing to say."
"The answer is no…we think," Carrie said. "He's safe to come out if he is, but maybe he's not ready."
"He's not gay," Megan said.
"You're sure?" Charlie asked.
Megan just nodded her head. How she knew she didn't elaborate, but her assuredness must have been enough for everyone else because no one asked any follow-ups.
"What about Jack?" I asked.
The abrupt, loud, cackling laughter that came out of each of them scared the crap out of me. I hadn't been expecting it.
"Never," Rachel said. "Fucking never."
"He's the only one keeping the soul suckers in business since most of the brothers have old ladies now."
There were still a bunch who didn't, but yeah, it was a lot more than I'd been expecting when I walked back into the clubhouse.
"He takes them like three or four at a time," Carrie whispered. Her eyes popped wide open, making me laugh at her. It was like she truly couldn't believe it.
"Jesus."
That's the last thing I said before the brothers were filtering into the room. I hoped I had heard all the gossip. Although, a thirty minute ranting session couldn't possibly mean I got all of it.
I definitely felt better, like I might be finding my place amongst these women. There wasn't a hierarchy–which surprised me. Theoretically, I had Rachel's position in Taehyung's club, but when your man didn't respect you, it made it hard for others to respect you, including the other old ladies. Other than Rachel being the clear leader, the mama bear–or lion I guess.
I still didn't know where The Pride nickname came from.
I'd have to ask at a later date because Lisa was walking right towards me. She looked calm, which honestly worried me more than if she'd been stressed out. Calm meant there was a plan in place, and one that probably involved violence.
Lisa loved violence so much. She loved the blood. I saw all her demons, the ones she tried to hide from everyone else in the club. I thought Seokmin was the only one who truly saw her for how she was, and that was only because they grew up together.
Sometimes the blood was the only thing that satisfied her demons. After all this time, I still wasn't sure where they came from. Maybe they were just a product of growing up in the club. I wasn't afraid of them though, never afraid of her, even the first time she asked to cut me. Even the first time she told me how much she enjoyed killing.
She was going to get so much pleasure from killing Taehyung.
I wanted her to.
"Come on, babe," she said, holding her hand out to me.
I barely murmured a goodbye to the girls as I stood, walking with her right out of the bar area with her.
Lisa led me up the stairs, down to our room. I knew the kids were safe, playing in the playroom with the nannies. I hoped they adjusted well, because this was home now.
As soon as I was in the room, Lisa closed and locked the door behind us, pulled me to her, swept me into her arms and walked me to the bed. She didn't try to kiss me, just kept her eyes on mine the entire time.
Those brown eyes only showed emotion when they looked at me. At my kids. Occasionally at the brothers, but never more than when she looked at me.
"Lisa," I murmured.
She didn't reply as she laid me gently on the bed.
Still, she didn't kiss me.
She rest her head against my chest, knees pushing against the back of my thighs, breathing against me.
"Lisa? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah," she whispered.
I ran my hands through chestnut hair, fingering through the soft strands. she used to do this when we were younger, like just laying with me quieted her mind.
So, I let her lay there, unsure of what she was doing, or why she was doing it, only knowing it was exactly what she needed in that moment.
The position wasn't the most comfortable I'd ever been in, but her hands slid up under my t-shirt, putting us skin to skin, making goosebumps rise across my skin. Even still, it wasn't sexual. It was intimate. Loving. But there was nothing sexual about the way she touched me.
When she wanted to tell me what happened in church, she would.
Until then, I'd let her lay on me just like this, for as long as she needed.