and we will come back home, and we will come back home. home again.

-From Now On (From "The Greatest Showman"), Peter Hollens

Stray shafts of pale dawn light peek through the tent flaps. You haven't slept a wink, cradling a cold cup of tea in your lap. You'd downed three already, chasing the rush of caffeine to get you through whatever is to come. The others would not hear of you participating in the battle in any fashion. It's frustrating, though you know in your heart that they're right—the battlefield is no place for a pregnant woman. Still, you felt a twinge of dismay when Fíli left you in the tent to go practice some battle techniques.

Gandalf sits across from you, stirring his own cup. "So," he begins lightly, "how long have you and Fíli…?"

You gulp, dreading the conversation in fear of judgment. "Since Rivendell," you say quietly. "Everything happened so fast. We didn't know if we'd ever get the chance to have a real life together. But maybe now…"

"Does this mean you no longer seek a way to return to your own world?"

That's not the direction you expected the discussion to go. "I hadn't thought of that." You search within yourself, as if rummaging around in your very soul. "But I don't think I can anymore—if I ever could."

Gandalf raises an eyebrow.

"When I first came here, I felt this… this pull within me. As if some part of me was missing, like I left part of myself back in my own world. Like maybe I would wake up back at my campsite at any second. But now, I don't feel that anymore." You pause. That's only partly true, isn't it? You haven't felt that pull in a long time. Not since you discovered you were pregnant. Your eyes grow misty. "All of me is here now. I… I don't belong there anymore." It's painful to say aloud.

Gandalf seems to understand your conflicted feelings, reaching out a hand to pat your knee. "I'm sure you will be well looked after here in Middle Earth," he comforts you. "Fíli seems quite proud."

You smile weakly. "He is. Kíli too, for his part. I just hope Thorin–"

"Y/N! Y/N, Fíli, where are you?"

A shout rings out from outside the tent. You leap up and dash from the tent, recognizing the voice of Ori. The young dwarf in his ill-fitting armor huffs and puffs as he jogs toward you.

Fíli sheathes his sword, stepping forward and putting an arm out to shield you—just in case. "Ori? What are you doing here?"

Ori bends over, hands on his knees. "Thorin… Thorin wants you back… both of you," he wheezes. "He… says he's sorry… wants you by his side…"

Gandalf emerges from the tent. "Has the King Under the Mountain regained his senses, then?"

Before Ori can reply, you hear a tremendous roar from the gates of the Lonely Mountain. The troops of Dáin, who had arrived during the night, raise up their weapons. Even from far across the field, you hear them clearly. "Oakenshield! Oakenshield!" they chant jubilantly.

Fíli looks at Gandalf. "I think that's your answer." He dashes into the tent and grabs your bag, looping it over your shoulders. "Come on, then!"

Gandalf stops you with a hand. "Y/N. Are you sure this is wise?"

You swallow. "I'm not sure of anything anymore," you admit. "But I'm not staying here if I can be with my… my family."

He withdraws his hand. "Then move with haste and caution, and give my regards to the king."

You nod, squeezing Fíli's arm and falling into line behind Ori, who keeps adjusting his helm awkwardly as you make your way towards Erebor. The shadow of the mountain looms over you, and you shiver. Fíli rubs his hand up and down your back comfortingly. "We're going home for good, Y/N," he whispers. "I promise."

You open your mouth to reply, but a rumbling interrupts you. From the north, you see them approaching, armor clanging and weapons beating against shields. The army of Azog.

A look of horror dawns on Fíli's face. The three of you break into a sprint, as fast as you can manage. When you arrive at the wall, a rope falls down in front of you. Nori's face peers down from the rampart. "Up, quick!"

You stare at the rope, then up at him, gesturing to your belly helplessly.

Fíli rolls his eyes and crouches down. "Come on," he grunts.

You wrap your arms around his neck in an awkward piggy-back, clinging on for dear life as he slowly clambers up the wall. Just as you feel like your arms are about to give out, Nori's hands grab yours and haul you over the rampart. "Welcome back, lass."

"Where are the others?" Fíli puffs.

Nori waves down to the ground, where you can see Thorin and the rest of the Company at the front gate, their communion with Dáin interrupted by the approaching orc army. A thrill of hope and terror fills your heart when you glimpse Bilbo's tiny figure among them.

"Y/N." Fili grips your shoulders and kisses you firmly, fingers running along your courting braid. "I must fight."

Throat tight, you nod. "Don't do anything stupid."

He flashes you a smirk. "I would never!" Fingering your bead one last time, he turns and rushes down the stairs into the tower, grumbling something about climbing up the wall just to go back down. Nori follows.

Ori looks at your hair with delight. "You have a braid! And a bead! Congratulations, Y/N!" He chuckles. "Dori owes me—I wagered Fíli would propose before November's end."

You smile, but it fades quickly as a trumpets sounds below you. The orc army is near now, and the combined men, elvish, and dwarven forces surge forward with a roar, Thorin at the head. A tiny blonde head bobs and weaves through the ranks, Fíli hastening to join his brother and uncle. You lift your hand as if he could see you.

Ori taps your shoulder and thrusts a crossbow into your arms. "Just in case."

"Aren't you joining them?"

He shakes his head. "We're the defensive forces," he says, puffing out his chest proudly.

Great.

You never realized how loud a battle really was—even though you had to adjust the volume when watching the movies as they bounced back and forth between quiet dialogue and triumphant fights. Up on the wall, it's mostly calm, though you get the occasional shot in at a few particularly dimwitted orcs who stray too close.

You're sitting against the wall when you hear it—a loud roar of rage, far too close. Scrambling to your feet, you peer down. At the base of the wall, among a circle of corpses, stand Thorin and Azog. Your heart leaps in your throat. Just like in the movie, just like in your dream, Azog drags Fíli by the collar. Hardly thinking, you grip your crossbow shakily and level it at the enormous orc. But you're no skilled archer, and this is no ordinary foot soldier; your shot lands at his feet. It draws Azog's attention, though, and he looks up at the mountain. You load another bolt, struggling against the draw weight. Ori lends you his strength, and the arrow snaps into place. The distraction gives Fíli enough of a window to stab at the arm holding him, causing the orc to drop him reflexively. Fíli rolls away quickly and springs to his feet, taking his place at Thorin's side. Kíli is there too, bow already drawn and aimed, but Thorin holds out an arm to stop him. This is his fight.

The dwarven king and Azog circle each other slowly. It's hard to see what's going on from the wall—you can't bear it any longer.

"Y/N! Where are you going?" Ori cries as you sprint down the stairs, dashing through the halls from the tower to the gates.

Snow stings your face, and vomit rises up in your throat at the smell of death all around. You push past it, pressing your back against the wall to remain unseen. I just need to see what happens, you tell yourself. No closer.

Thorin and Azog still haven't attacked each other, but Azog has gained a flail since you made it down to the battlefield. He spits something in Orcish that you don't recognize, lashing out with his sword arm. Thorin ducks under the swing, slashing at the orc's torso. Azog twists away and brings down his flail. He narrowly misses the dwarf and snarls in frustration. Blood spatters the snow from the stab Fíli inflicted.

Your breath shakes. They're so close, so, so close. With sweaty hands, you raise your crossbow again, aiming right for the orc's back, and fire. This time your arrow flies true and buries itself in the meat of Azog's shoulder. He growls and whips around, tiny eyes pinpointing you against the wall. He takes a great, lumbering step forward.

Shit shit shit.

But as the giant orc approaches you, a little hobbit appears from thin air, throwing himself at Azog's feet and causing him to stumble. The orc barely has time to register what's beneath him before a blade rips through his chest. It withdraws and plunges through again and again with a fury until Azog sinks to a knee with a bloody gurgle. And suddenly, a jagged line appears across the orc's neck, and his head drops to the ground with a wet thud. He remains upright for a heartbeat before collapsing.

Thorin plants his boot on top of the orc's body, breathing heavily and gripping a glistening, bloody Orcrist. He spits on Azog's corpse and raises his sword with a triumphant shout. "For Thrain! For Thror! For Erebor!"

The raging battle around you pauses, orcs and goblins gaping at their headless general. Somewhere, one shouts, and they start a hasty retreat. Bodies drop among them as elvish arrows pierce their armor and dwarven axes cleave through their helmets, leaving few to escape the battlefield intact.

Thorin lifts his head and meets your eyes. He lowers his sword and begins to approach, but stumbles as Fíli pushes past him in a sprint.

"What are you doing down here, ghivashel?" he scolds breathlessly, crushing you in his embrace.

You cling to him as if your life depends on it. "Saving your idiot uncle," you choke out.

Kíli picks Bilbo up and brushes the hobbit off, mussing up his hair. "That was stupid of the two of you," he says with a grin, pushing Bilbo forward. He embraces you tightly as well.

You squeeze your eyes shut against tears.

"Y/N."

They blink open as Kíli releases you.

Thorin's face is battered and dirty, blood dripping from a gash across his forehead. "I owe you my deepest apologies."

Instead of replying, you reach out and wipe the blood away from his brow. "You look awful," you reply with a wobbly smile.

He pauses, then smiles and claps you on the shoulder. "We did it, Y/N. Welcome home."