12

By the time Rosalie drove the boat back up to the dock, Bella had helped herself to two more wine coolers, had her turn on the skis, and felt more relaxed than she had in three years, two months, and seventeen days. The boys' boat was already back, and when they headed up to the house, they saw all of them sitting on the back deck. All of them except Jasper.

"He's inside," Ben said, tilting his head to the side when Bella and the others joined them. "For the record, he pouted the entire time."

Bella laughed. "I'm sure he did, and I'm sure you gave him shit for it, too, didn't you?"

Ben grinned, wrapping his arms around Alice and pulling her onto his lap, causing her to squeal. "Yep!"

"I told you to let him win!"

"And I told you that it's my job as the older twin to never let him win. Sorry, Bells, but my job is very important to me."

"You're such an asshole, Ben."

Bella shook her head, but left them laughing as she walked into the house, through the kitchen, and upstairs, down the hallway and to their bedroom. As Ben said he would be, Jasper was sitting on the edge of the bed, but when he saw her, he scrambled to his feet and hurried across the room, wrapping his arms around her and pushing her backward against the wall in the hallway, causing her to laugh.

"Did you miss me, love?"

"God, yes," he moaned, peppering her throat and neck with kisses. "If you want, I'd be more than happy to show you just how much I missed you, Cricket."

Bella groaned, her fingers tangling in his hair, but before she could push him back into their bedroom, and have her way with him — again — the sound of someone hurrying upstairs had both of them sighing and when they looked over, they found Carlisle standing there with a smirk on his lips.

"Don't get naked. We're heading to The Cove for lunch. And don't argue, Swan; it's tradition."

"You know, we don't have to relive every tradition. Why don't you go without us, and when you get back you can tell us how amazing the ribs are. It'll be just like we were there," Bella suggested, trying to turn Jasper's face back toward her.

"Nope," Carlisle quipped, folding his arms in front of him. "You'll have plenty of alone time tonight. Right now, we're going to The Cove for lunch, as we always do, and you're going to suck it up, or we will make it our mission to keep you and lover boy apart as long as we can, and you know we can."

"You're such an asshole," Bella muttered under her breath. "Fine, whatever, we'll be down in five minute."

"Ten minutes," Jasper said.

"More like fifteen," Bella replied, nodding.

Carlisle grinned. "You have two minutes, Swan, or I'll send her up here."

He turned and walked back down the stairs, leaving just Bella and Jasper in the hallway, his hands on her ass, her hands on either side of his face.

"Told you we should have left this morning, spent the next three days naked and in bed at a nice, private hotel, but no, you said we had to stay here and reconnect with everyone. Bet you're regretting that now, ain't you, Cricket?"

"Yep." Bella placed her hands on Jasper's chest and pushed him backward into their bedroom. She closed the door behind her, but put her hands up when Jasper started toward her again. "You know he will send her up here."

"I'm not afraid of her," he scoffed.

She laughed.

"I'm not!"

"You're cute when you're being stupid. You and I, and everyone else, knows that if Alice comes up here, we will not get another second of alone time. She will make it her mission to cock block you, and, well, I would really like to have your cock inside of me again."

Jasper groaned and reached for her, but again stopped, when Bella put up her hands. "I'm serious, Jay!"

"Fine, whatever. Change and I'll guard the door."

Bella laughed and waited until Jasper was out in the hallway before she walked over to her suitcase and grabbed a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. Her eyes landed on the brochures Heidi had stuffed into her suitcase and she picked up the one for Bayview. She turned and sat on the side of the bed as she unfolded it, her eyes flickering from the handful of photos of men and women much older than Renee. They were laughing and smiling, making it seem like they were having the best time of their life.

A state of the art facility with a dedicated staff to provide comprehensive skilled care, compassion, and creating an intentional home-like experience for your loved ones, it said. It seemed like a nice place, a comfortable place, a place that would give her the love and care she needed, but that was Bella's responsibility, wasn't it? To take care of her mother, to protect her, to love her. Renee had loved and protected and taken care of her every day until the night of the accident, so how could she just lock her away and move on with her life? Didn't that make her a selfish little bitch?

"Alice, no! She's mine and you can't have her!"

Shifting her eyes to the door as it was pushed open, Bella realized that she had been crying when Alice and Jasper both stopped and stared at her. "It's not fair. It's not fucking fair!"

"Cricket, sweetheart?" Jasper nudged Alice out of the way and hurried to her side, kneeling on the floor in front of her. "Baby, talk to me."

"It's not fair," Bella cried, letting the brochure fall to the floor as she placed her hands on either side of his face. "I need her, Jay. I need her so much. Why would God take her away when I need her so fucking much?"

"I don't know, Cricket. I don't know."

"Jasper," Alice said, kneeling next to him. "We'll bring you both back something."

He nodded. "Thanks, Al."

"Of course." She shifted her eyes to Bella, frowning. "Bella . . ."

But Bella could only cry, so Alice stood up and walked out of their bedroom, closing the door behind them. Jasper shifted them so that he was sitting on the bed with her in his arms, holding her tight as she continued to cry, unable to stop the tears from pouring down her face. She knew she was going to have to put her mother inside Bayview, or The Traymore, or some other assisted living center. They were right: she couldn't keep trying to be the only one to take care of her, not anymore. It was exhausting, but that didn't make the guilt Bella felt any easier to handle.

"I miss them," Bella whimpered, her tears dripping off her chin onto his shirt. "I miss them so much."

"Me too," he whispered, kissing the top of her head. "And her brownies."

Bella laughed through her tears. "Me too. I've tried to make them. Thought maybe they might, I don't know, bring her back to me. Even if it was just for a moment, you know?"

"Yeah."

"She took one bite of them and threw the pan against the wall. Said they tasted like dog shit, that everything I make her tastes like dog shit. My mom would never, ever, ever talk to me like that, Jay."

"No, she wouldn't. She used to scold us for even saying shit."

"Said it made us sound uneducated and uncouth. Daddy, though, would just laugh and say just let them sound uneducated, Ren, save me some money on her tuition. We can go to Paris instead."

"They loved you, Cricket. They loved you more than they loved anyone, and they wouldn't want you to be miserable like this."

"I know," she whispered, tilting her head back and looking up at him. "I know what I have to do, Jay. I just don't know how I am going to do it."

"We'll do it together."

"Together?"

Jasper nodded and placed his hand on the side of her face. "I told you, Cricket; I'm not giving you up again. When it's time to go back, I'm going with you."

"You can't just . . . you can't just uproot your life and follow me back to Bainbridge Island, Jay."

"Why can't I?"

Bella scrambled off the bed and turned and looked at him. "Because you're married."

His eyes closed before he scooted to the edge of the bed. "I told you I'm not with her like that anymore. Haven't been in long time, Cricket."

"But technically, you are married, Jay."

"So? You're saying we can't be together until Maria and I are officially divorced?"

"Can we?"

"Of course we can." Jasper stood up and reached for her, but when she took a step backward, he said, "Cricket."

"I'm not saying we can't, but can we? I mean, can we really?"

"Of course we can. I told you we're supposed to appear in court in a couple weeks."

"And if she doesn't show? Then what? I'm not going to be the other woman, Jay. I won't."

"You've never been the other woman." Jasper placed his hands on her hips, tugging her body against his. "You're the love of my life, Cricket."

"And you're the love of mine, Jay, but —"

"There are no buts. I let you push me away once. I'm not letting you do it again. You and me, Cricket, we're end game. Forever. I'll get down on one knee right now if that's what you need me to do."

"No!" she exclaimed, her eyes widening and she threw her hands up to his chest. "No, don't . . . don't do that, Jay. I'm just . . . I don't want you to resent me for trapping you in a life that is not . . . If I do put her in an assisted living center, Jay, it's not like I can . . . I can't just abandon her there. My life will still be tied to her, working to afford her bills. I don't even know if I can afford to put her inside any of those places," Bella said, gesturing toward the stack of brochures.

"There's all kinds of programs that will help with the costs. Let's take it one step at a time, okay? We — both of us — will tour each of them, decide which one is the right fit for her, and for you. Just don't push me away, any of us away, because we've all missed you, Cricket."

Bella nodded, leaning her forehead against the middle of his chest. "I missed you, too, Jay. Every day."

—WL—

Bella changed into dry, clean clothes, and then she and Jasper read through each and every brochure. While it was clear Bayview was the better option, the price tag was considerably more, according to the google search. But it also had the best reviews from families who had trusted Bayview with their loved ones. They were in the middle of the brochures when Heidi texted her.

Bella felt her entire body tense as she picked up her phone and opened the message, sighing in relief when she got a picture of Renee and Heidi sitting on the front porch. The smile on her mother's face made it easy to forget that her mother was no longer her mother. It was rare that Heidi could coax Renee out onto the porch in the middle of the afternoon. The picture was followed by a quick text that simply said: Get your sex on, Swan. She's doing great today.

Jasper laughed. "That's Heidi, huh?"

Bella nodded, replying back with a simple thumbs up, knowing better than to encourage her with confirmation about the status of her sex life. "She's incorrigible."

"I think she's brilliant," he said, nodding as he rolled onto his knees and pulled her down the bed so that she was laying beneath him. "And I think she's right when she tells you that it's time to get your sex on. Especially your sex on with me."

Bella narrowed her eyes at him. "I bet you do, Jay."

Jasper balanced himself on one hand, his other hand traveling to her hip, dipping beneath her shirt. "Do you want me to stop?"

"No."

He smiled and moved his hand up her side, just under her breast. "Do you want me to stop now?"

Bella shook her head. "Nope."

Jasper's eyes never left hers as his fingers brushed across her nipple. "And now?"

"No," she breathed softly. "No, no, no, don't stop."

Jasper smiled as he leaned backward and tugged off his shirt, tossing it onto the floor. He reached for the hem of her shirt, lifting his eyes brows in question. Bella sat up and raised her arms, allowing him to remove his shirt, leaving her in only a pair of black cotton shorts.

"You're so goddamn beautiful," he whispered, shifting down the bed and grabbing the front of her shorts. "Lift."

Bella bit the inside of her lip as she braced her feet onto the bed and lifted her hips off the bed, allowing him to slip her shorts and panties down her legs and when she dropped her hips against the mattress, she lifted her legs and allowed him to remove them completely.

His blue eyes drifted down the length of her nude body, his tongue snaking out between his lips. "Can I have you, Cricket? Can I have you forever?"

"Are you sure you want me forever?"

Jasper's eyes shifted up to hers. "I've always wanted you forever. Just you."

"Jay."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Jasper leaned down so he was hovering over her, his lips finding hers once more as his hand gripped her hip and he pressed his body against hers, the full length of his body against hers. Bella moaned, her fingers tangling in his hair as he shifted downward, his lips licking and sucking and kissing on every inch of her skin until his mouth was hovering over her pussy. He smiled her smile before pressing her legs apart and snaking his tongue out, giving her pussy a slow, deep lick.

"Goddamn it, Jay, don't stop!"

"I have no intention of stopping, sweetheart. I told you last night I was going to eat your pussy so hard, you would cum for days."

"Then get to eating already."

Jasper laughed before he leaned down again and attacked her pussy like he'd never tasted her before. Bella writhed against the mattress, clamping her lips together to keep from screaming, or begging for more, or both. He had always known exactly what she needed, how she needed it, when she needed it. Jasper wrapped his hands around her thighs, lifting her hips against his mouth as his tongue reached deeper inside her.

"Oh, my God, Jay," Bella moaned, pulling on his hair.

"Jesus fuck, Cricket, if you keep pulling my hair like that, I'm going to be forced to turn you onto her knees and fuck you hard."

"Is that so?" she asked, raising an eyebrow before giving his hair a hard tug.

Jasper narrowed his eyes at her before he grabbed her hips and forced her onto her hands and knees. He leaned around her and yanked the drawer on the nightstand open with so much forced, the drawer was pulled out of the table and hit the floor with a loud, thud.

Bella laughed and looked over her shoulder. "Someone's in a hurry."

"Don't fucking move, Cricket," Jasper muttered, shifting so that he could reach down and grab one of the condoms off the floor. He moved back so that he was behind her and shoved his shorts and underwear off, before locking his eyes back onto hers and tearing open the foil package and rolling the latex down his cock, his chest heaving as he groaned. "This isn't going to be gentle."

"Good, I don't want gentle."

Jasper shuttered before he grabbed her hips and thrust himself inside her.

"Fuck," they muttered together.

As Jasper had warned her he was going to be, he wasn't gentle with her. He started hard and only thrust harder, faster, deeper with every shift of his hips. Bella dropped her forehead against the pillow, but when Jasper grabbed her hair and pulled her head back up, she cried out.

"Don't stop, Jay. Don't fucking stop!"

"I ain't stopping, darlin'," he groaned, slamming his hips against her backside.

"Jay," she whimpered, throwing her hand up against the headboard, her fingers wrapping around the wooden slats as she felt herself clenching around him.

"Oh, my God, oh my God, oh my God." He was panting, his fingers clutching against her hips to the point that she knew she would end up with bruises — bruises that would be worth having with how good he was fucking her. "Sweetheart, cum again. I need you to cum with me again."

"So close," she groaned, pushing her hips back against him. "So close."

Jasper released her hair and grabbed her hip again as he slammed against her one final time, the word, "fuck" hissing from between his lips just before he collapsed against her, the weight of his body causing both of them to flatten against the mattress. She looked over her shoulder at him, and they both started to laugh.

"Sweetheart, I can't get enough of you."

Bella smiled, rolling so that she was facing him. "I can't get enough of you, either, love."

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