Of all the years that they had spent together, of all the bickering and of the silly arguments that they seemed to get into, he thought this one was completely rational but so fucking frustrating. After Buffy had stormed out, he raged around the room, half tempted to throw, well, anything but after he had calmed down, he understood.
Every time the subject of Parker was brought up, she made it explicitly clear what he was capable of and the firsthand accounts of all the fallout from his sadistic games. He knew of the family; Giles had also warned him but his own need to play the knight in shining armour blinded his vision.
He tried to call to say that he was sorry and that if she wanted to, that she should come back, and he would try to make it up to her. The first time the call rang and rang he didn't mind, by the third attempt he was beginning to get worried. His text remained unanswered, so he thought he would try Giles, but his stepfather beat him to the punch.
He could tell by the timbre of his voice that something had happened, he didn't relay much information other than that he should come straight away. He felt out of sync, like his actions, his thoughts and his heartbeat were all amiss. It was like he was having an out of body experience, but unable to see clearly, like he was underwater.
As he made his way down the long white corridor, he stared ahead not paying attention to anyone or anything. It was like he was standing still but the room was moving, it didn't feel like he was moving one foot in front of the other but that door in the far end, was getting bigger and bigger.
When he was close enough to the room at the end of the hall he could hear hysterical crying, he watched as Giles stepped out of the room and say something to him. If truth be told, he wouldn't be able to repeat what it was, it was like he had said nothing at all.
He placed his hand on the door and pushed it open slowly, along with the crying he could hear his heart beating, thudding away loudly in his ears. His eyes travelled up from the floor, up to her jeans that were dirty and torn, up by her top that was stained a deep shade of red and finally, to her face. He managed to choke back the emotion, just barely.
The doctor who was beside her was doing their best to calm her down, each time he touched her skin with some cotton soaked in alcohol she shrieked louder. When the doctor moved away, and he saw her full features he felt the tears escape. She must have felt him through her own pain and her eyes snapped to his.
He saw her eyes widen before she let out a muffled cry, she shook her head and brought her bloodied and cut hand up to cover the righthand side of her mouth. He had already saw the bruises and scrapes but from between her fingers he could see the harsh colouring of the sutures that were holding together the deep gash that ran across her mouth. The more she panicked, the more the doctor warned her to calm down or that they would give her something to make her calm.
She shook her head furiously; her blonde locks were matted at the end from the blood that had escaped from her wound. The doctor faced Angel and nodded towards the door "Out. Now" doing as he was told, he backed up and slipped through the door.
When he looked at Giles, his stepfather placed his hand on his shoulder, preempting the question that he wanted to ask, "It seems that she got into an argument with Parker in the park and he attacked her…" he took off his glasses and wiped them furiously "Others were there and they intervened, Angel, it could have been so much worse".
He blinked a couple of times and felt sick, had this been his fault? She had explicitly said that this would not go unnoticed, that something had to give. If he hadn't filed that paperwork, their argument nor her storming off would never have happened. Was this his fault that she had severe injuries?
He felt something inside of him snap, this could have been his dealing but in no way shape or form did that excuse the brutality of what Parker had done to her. He shook off Giles hand and started towards the exit down the hall, he couldn't wait to get his hands on that piece of shit.
Giles ran after him and blocked him from leaving "Where in the hell do you think you're going?" Getting a glare as a response he frowned "So you're going to beat up Parker, risk your career and livelihood?"
Angel flicked Giles hand away from his chest "I don't give a fuck about that… he's not getting away with this" when he tried to move Giles body blocked him "Get out of my way, old man".
Giles shook his head "Now what is that going to accomplish?"
Feeling anger rise he spat out "It'll feel good" Giles rolled his eyes and blocked him from leaving again. Angel tried to strike him but was soon caught up in an arm lock with his face pressed against the wall "let me go!"
"No, I will not have you charge off with a half-cocked plan and a dangerous intent, we cannot change what that horrible young man done but we can be there for Buffy" feeling Angel relax, he let him go.
Angel turned to face him with tears in his eyes "This is my fault, Giles. She wanted to give things time, I was the one who pushed things and I pushed her away…" he felt a shudder roll through him as he looked at his stepfather.
Giles pulled him into a half hug to console him, the utter despair on his son's face was killing him "We all know that you did it for her, you're in love with her…"
Angel looked at him sadly, although their relationship wasn't some best kept secret or a big mistake, they hadn't found the time to sit down and discuss this with him. Giles was both of their father figure, so having his blessing would make all the difference.
With a smile Giles added "You've been in love with her for the longest of time, all you've ever done was for her, even all those times you spent bickering. You've always wanted the best for Buffy" he wiped at his own damp eyes "Now what Buffy needs is your support; this is not going to be easy".
Being in this situation, being back at a hospital, feeling the hurt and the pain, it was like it was back on the night they met. Back then he rescued her and wanted to protect the stranger who he had just met and now he loved her and wanted to keep protecting her.
Before he could reply he heard his name being called, he turned round to find Faith standing awkwardly a foot away from them "How is Buffy".
Angel stalked over to her, towering over her as he ground out "Why do you care? Here to wound her some more, make her life even more a living hell?" To her credit she didn't flinch, she kept an even face and held his hostile gaze.
Giles cleared his throat "Young Faith here was the one to call the police, she, along with Luke kept Parker from doing more damage" he saw Angel look down at her blood-soaked hands and back up to her eyes.
Faiths bottom lip trembled but she managed to sound even when she spoke "I've gave my statement to the cops, they cuffed him at the park so at least he's downtown for tonight" her breath hitched in her throat "I know I was a bitch, I don't deserve no sympathy for what I've done but she didn't deserve that…"
That was true, although she played a part in the misery for all these weeks, joshing around was fully different to assault and battery. When she heard that glass break and seen him lunge at her, she didn't hesitate to run over and break them up. Unfortunately, he had managed to cut her and leave her with various cuts and bruises.
"Buffy fought like hell; he didn't get away without some damage… I just didn't get there in time" she stuck her chin out, trying to hold Angel's gaze. Right now, the look he was giving her made her feel even more like shit than she already felt for her part in all this.
Angel couldn't bring himself to speak to her, he gave a short nod of the head before facing Giles again. Faith nodded as well before slipping out of sight, Giles placed his hand on his shoulder "Go, be with her…"
With sigh he left his stepfather and went back in the direction of her room, the doctor that had been in with her earlier came out "Buffy has managed to calm down, we're not wanting to keep her here but if she doesn't remain calm then we may have to, you can go in now".
Angel thanked the doctor and stepped back into the room, Buffy was huddled up on the gurney, knees to chest and her head laying back against the wall. She looked so sad, so defeated, just like the night they met, and it made him want to cry "Buffy?"
Her damp eyes rolled from staring off into the distance to looking back at him, as she looked at the horror on his face, she choked back a sob and hid her face "Don't look at me" she closed her eyes and cried. She was in agony, although they had used a local anaesthetic before suturing her mouth, a dull tugging sensation could still be felt.
Immediately he climbed on the bed beside her and pulled her into a hug, being mindful of her injuries. As soon as she felt his embrace she wailed, that same hysterical cry that he heard from her when he first arrived. He carefully soothed her scalp with his fingers and murmured to her just how much he loved her.
They remained in silence for however long, he wasn't quite sure, but it felt like an age, before the doctor came back in "Miss Summers, as long as you feel okay then we can let you home tonight but if you are showing any symptoms of a concussion or any heat, discharge or unusual bleeding from your wound come straight back".
Buffy nodded curtly, she'd had a concussion in the past, it was something she was fully aware of but thankfully she didn't seem to have had one. She heard Angel thank the doctor before they heard the door open, and someone clear their throat. Her heart sank when she was faced with Detective Finn.
"Miss Summers… can we have a word in private?" He looked between Buffy and Angel, giving them a knowing look. Angel leaned over and whispered to her before kissing her cheek as he slid off the gurney and bypassed Finn.
Buffy bit her lip "Riley, can't this wait till tomorrow?" When he shook his head she stifled a cry, she knew she had to tell her side of the story, but she was flat out, she was exhausted and just wanted to go home.
Angel paced outside of the room, he could hear muffled voices and it took all of his might not to burst back in when he heard her begin to cry again. He clenched his fist and looked at Giles, hoping for him to urge him to intervene but he gave him the same tired look.
After a while Detective Finn came out and gave him a weak smile "That's all for now, I'll be in contact with you all soon" he nodded to them both and exited down the hall. Angel rubbed his hands over his face and sighed, he went back into the room and helped her off the gurney and pulled her into his embrace.
She didn't say anything, she barely moved at all, even being in his arms she remained tense. Angel kissed the top of her head then escorted her out to his car with Giles walking behind until he reached his own.
They sat in silence as they made the journey back to Crawford Street, as they pulled up outside Buffy remained silent, looking at her hands. Angel stroked her shoulder to get her attention but still she avoided looking at him. Without saying anything he scooped her out of the car and took her up to his room.
Buffy refused to go near the bathroom to avoid the mirror but when she saw her long locks matted with blood, she pleaded with him silently. She wanted to get rid of all of tonights events, wash them away, scrub herself raw in the impossible chance that it would wipe her memory clean too, but she could barely stand up she was so exhausted.
Angel let out a deep breath "Doc said you've to keep your wound as dry as possible until it begins to heal…" he looked at his watch and saw that it was nearing midnight, as much as it was no problem to help, he had firsthand experience with how long it took her to dry and style her hair on a good day.
When it looked like she was going to cry again he stroked her hand with his and led her down to the bathroom. He could see her doing her best to avoid looking at herself, at first, she flinched when his hands smoothed soap over her body and the shampoo into her hair but eventually she relaxed and leaned against him for support.
Her blood had dried into her hair, he worked the shampoo into the ends before getting her to tilt her head back to rinse it off. He done his best, but her hair still looked a little discoloured, when he mentioned this to her, he didn't get much of a response.
He wrapped her in a towel before drying quickly himself and slipping on a pair of boxers. Buffy remained motionless as he dried her off and slipped one of his t shirts onto her. Lastly, he brushed out her hair and blasted it dry with the hairdryer, just enough so it would be comfortable to sleep on.
As if going through the motions, Buffy remained in place, eyes on the floor, when his fingertips caressed her arm, she slipped under the covers and lay curled up in the foetal position. Angel slid in behind her, spooning his big frame around her.
He could feel the uneasy breathing, her poor attempt at trying to remain calm but he didn't know what to say, what could he say anyway? He kissed the back of her head and linked his fingers through hers as he whispered "I love you Buffy" the only response he received was a muffled cry, so he held her until she cried herself to sleep.
Oooooooooooooooo
When Angel woke the next morning, he rolled over and felt the cold sheets where Buffy had fallen asleep in his arms. He sat up and looked around, he could hear muffled noises coming from down the hall. He carefully padded down to the bathroom and pushed the door open a little, Buffy was frantically raiding through the medicine cabinet and the drawers "Buffy".
Her hands were shaking as she was searching, she shook her head, sending water from her drenched locks across the bathroom. As she continued to look, Angel came closer and tried to hold her steady, but she shrieked, stepping away from him "It won't come out".
When he frowned, she stopped to look at him, she grabbed the ends of her long hair and held them tight "I can't get it out".
Angel looked to the ends of her hair and saw a faint discolouration; it looked like she had tried to wash her hair again, but it had only lifted the blood so much. She turned away and raided the drawer again until she found a pair of scissors and went to snip her hair. He managed to safely disarm her and throw them away.
He wrapped her in his arms when she started crying again "Hey, hey… don't" he could feel her shake her head against his chest, he held her tight and hushed her until her sobs ebbed off "Buffy?" Eventually she stopped resisting and wrapped her arms around him, holding him close.
Angel escorted them back to his room and sat down on the edge of the bed, bringing Buffy down beside him. Each time his eyes travelled over her face she flinched and tried to look away "Buffy… look at me" he caressed her cheek so that she would look at him.
Her eyes filled up with tears as she stared at him, her hand automatically trying to cover her injury "How can you look at this…"
He covered her hand with his and brought it down to his lap, her eyes followed them before coming back up to look at him as his other hand brushed her hair off her shoulder "I love you, Buffy and nothing would ever stop that…" he leaned over to kiss her cheek.
She stifled a cry and looked at him, he felt the sting of tears at the corner of his own eyes "I am so sorry… if I hadn't of pushed this, I won't ever forgive myself" when she looked away and pulled out of his grasp, he felt the tears fall "Buffy?"
Taking a deep breath, she shook her head and faced him again "I don't blame you… how could I? I know that you were only doing what you thought was best. This is all Parkers fault" she shuddered in hate and anger "And I hate him so much!" She closed her eyes and held her mouth, in her haste she felt an uncomfortable tug at the sutures.
He shot up and brought her into his arms, he held her tight as she cried again. He held her, wanting nothing more than to take all her pain away but he knew he couldn't.