A/N: Hey, everybody! I'm BearfootTruck. I'm primarily known for Sonic, Naruto, My Hero Academia and - to a certain extent - Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir, but I also do fics for other fandoms. Technically, this isn't my first Helltaker fic, but it is the first one I've done that's not a crossover (the first was "Piece of Mind", a Sonic/Doom/Helltaker crossover). Anyways, enjoy, and Happy National Pancake Day!

"Good morning, honey!"

John Terranova – better known as "Helltaker" – groaned as he opened his eyes upon hearing the familiar female voice. Surrounding his bed were the nine demon women who served as his loyal house guests. While this wasn't the first time that any of them had woken up before him, it was probably the first time that all of them had surrounded his bed before he'd awakened, which made him wonder:

"Girls…why are all of you waking me up at this hour?"

Modeus giggled. "It's National Pancake Day, silly!"

Justice pointed her index fingers at Helltaker. "Yeah, we want more of those awesome pancakes!"

Helltaker sat up and shook the cobwebs out of his head. "All right, I guess I can't refuse you breakfast…"

After heading down to the kitchen, Helltaker broke out a carton of eggs, a box of flour and a gallon of milk. After heating some oil in a pan, he mixed an egg, a cup of flour and a cup of milk in a bowl before pouring it into the pan. While he was doing so, Modeus hugged him from behind.

"Have I ever told you how horny the smell of pancakes makes me?" said Modeus.

Helltaker nodded. "Yes. Several times."

Somebody else hugged Helltaker from behind, and judging by the scent of red wine, it was Lucifer.

"Pay no heed to Modeus, my dear. You would find yourself in a more propitious arrangement if you were to fornicate with me."

"Lucifer, don't make me put you on the punishment sofa!" said Judgment.

"Oh, hold your tongue, Judgment! I was merely being coquettish with him!"

"Ladies, can we stop fighting?" Helltaker took the first pancake out of the pan and put it onto a plate. "We're all supposed to be enjoying pancakes."

Malina rubbed her forehead. "Not to mention I have a terrible hangover."

Zdrada chuckled. "Since when do you NOT have a hangover, Malinka?"

Malina glared at Zdrada. "Oh, shut up, Zdrada. I'm not the one who has a cigarette before breakfast."

"Forget cigarettes; I'm still waiting on my coffee," said Pandemonica.

"I put some in the coffee maker for you, Pandemonica." Helltaker finished another pancake.

"Oh, how sweet."

"How many pancakes do you have left to go?" asked the left woman of Cerberus.

"Yeah, I'm hungry!" said the center woman of Cerberus.

"Me too!" said the right woman of Cerberus.

"Relax, Cerberus, I only have a few more to go." Helltaker finished cooking another pancake.

"God, I can hardly wait!" said Justice. "This is like my favorite holiday ever!"

"You and me both, Justice," said Azazel.

Eventually, Helltaker finished cooking the pancakes.

"All right, ladies, put whatever toppings you want on them."

Helltaker put out the pancakes, and the women served themselves and put their toppings of choice. Perhaps the most popular topping combination was Nutella and bananas, though quark mixed with some sugar was also quite popular. Regardless, the women expressed their appreciation for the pancakes:

"I swear, no matter how many times I have these, I never get tired of 'em!" said Justice.

"Me neither!" said Zdrada.

"I know; they're the next best thing to an orgasm!" said Modeus.

"I wouldn't go that far, but they're perfect for any occasion," said Malina.

"Most indubitably," said Lucifer.

"I wish we could have these all the time!" said Cerberus.

"I couldn't have these for every meal, but I do love them," said Azazel.

"They go really well with coffee," said Pandemonica.

"Or human blood," said Judgment. "Then again, Nutella is almost as good."

Helltaker smiled, knowing that he'd made the day of his dysfunctional demonic housemates.

Criticism is gold. Negativity and nitpicking are pyrite.