It was late in the night, and all was quiet under the cloak of darkness – at least, what little darkness could be found in the middle of a bustling metropolis like Tokyo. Theirs was a city that truly never slept, every nook and cranny touched by the ochre glow of artificial light that littered the landscape, reflected on the pillowy cover that hung high overhead. And amidst that sea of gray and yellow, there was one particular pinprick that hovered in the air, held aloft by a pair of thin arms, its stark white illumination casting the face of the one who squinted at it in subtle shadow.
It was late in the night, and Karen Houjou couldn't sleep.
Having grown weary of scrolling mindlessly down her SNS feed for the past twenty minutes, she laid her phone down and stared blankly up at the ceiling. After she'd left Chitose's apartment, the clouds had returned to smother the full moon and reclaim their place in the sky, leaving only what little remained of the ubiquitous urban glow to seep through the gap in her curtains. Everything was a black blur, much like the murk that permeated her thoughts, attempting to spare her the burden of reminiscence, of recollection, as she lay in restless silence.
It was hard not to remember, though. Particularly because this time, she wasn't only worried about herself.
Every emotion imaginable churned inside her as she gave in to her subconscious and allowed her focus to wander, reliving the agony of the shackles that bound her, the sweet relief of release, the helpless plunge back into despair and, finally, the sheer joy of being rescued by those she now called friends. Over and over again there was hope, then disappointment, then hope again.
But how long would it be until the disappointment inevitably returned?
No, she told herself. This time, things would be different. No matter the outcome, no matter how much time her newest acquaintance had left, she would do whatever she could to make sure neither she nor Chitose had any regrets. Whatever Chitose wanted or needed from her, she would provide without hesitation.
Even – or rather, especially – if it meant simply knowing the right things to say.
With her determination restored and her mind cleared of doubt, she reached over for her phone, typed a few words in the search bar, and began to read.
Wednesdays during summer training at 765 Production were reserved for the hardest form of training: performance rehearsals. This meant singing and dancing at the same time, as idols were expected to do on the day of their concert, and doing so repeatedly either until the trainer was satisfied or until the idols in question were reduced to nothing more than quivering lumps of exhausted flesh and bone sagging onto the wooden gym floor. More often than not, it was the latter.
The third member of their usual trio, Rin Shibuya, had joined them for today's session, and so by one o'clock there were now three such quivering lumps on the floor. The upcoming concert for Triad Primus, their aptly-named triumvirate, might have been a couple of months away, but that didn't stop their trainer from working them quite literally into the ground. Only when the departing steps of their trainer's trainers had disappeared out of earshot did they let out a long-drawn, heaving sigh in unison, blinking the sweat out of their eyes and shaking their heads as they glanced tiredly at each other.
Rin, dignified as ever despite her thirst, took an elegant, measured sip from her bottle. "You think Trainer-san was in a bad mood?" she asked. "She yelled at us a little more than usual."
"And that's really saying something," Karen quipped. "Haven't been snapped at like that since eighth grade."
"When you argued with Komura-sensei after falling asleep in class, right?" Rin smirked. "I thought he was gonna have a heart attack on the spot, the way he was seizing up. Although in fairness, I didn't blame you one bit for talking back."
"Wasn't that the day after Karen had to go to the hospital in the middle of the night for an emergency checkup?" Nao folded her arms. "Komura-sensei should've known better. But he was always famous for being a miserable old git, anyway." The others concurred with a giggle.
"Speaking of that, though," Rin added, "you looked somewhat off it today, Karen. Trainer-san really saved her worst for you, especially when we were practicing that twirl in the second verse of 'Trinity Field'."
"Yeah, I'm just… a little tired, I guess." Karen found it hard to disclose that she'd been on her phone until 5am, flitting between such disparate topics as how to talk to terminally ill people, what gifts to bring for a home visit, and where the best okonomiyaki places were within a five-mile radius. Before she knew it, the birds had started chirping outside her bedroom window, and she'd thrown her phone to one side and tried to force herself to sleep – which, as expected, didn't go well at all, and she'd lain awake until it was time to clamber out of bed and guzzle a hefty mug of coffee to keep herself conscious.
It wasn't the first all-nighter she'd ever pulled, though it was the first in quite some time. After all, she now usually had a reason to get herself well-rested for the next day.
Karen snuck a peek at Nao, who returned her gaze with a mixture of curiosity and concern. She'd yet to tell Nao how the visit to Chitose's home went, and as Rin wasn't part of the oath of silence she'd undertaken with the Producer and Nao, she wasn't sure when she'd get the chance to. Maybe she would give her a call later tonight.
As they packed up and made to leave, Karen pushed the gym door open. To her surprise, she found a familiar face staring back, blinking as she reciprocated Karen's stunned silence.
"…Karen-san?"
"Oh, hey, Chi… Kurosaki-san."
Chitose peered past Karen's shoulder, spotted Rin and Nao, and waved. They waved back uncertainly.
"Sorry to disturb you; I was just about to use the gym for some light training," she said. "You are finished, I presume?"
"…Yeah."
"Good." Chitose stepped away and stood at the doorway, her perfunctory smile never once wavering as she waited expectantly. Rin and Nao, taking the hint, quickly gathered their things and scurried out the door and down the corridor, leaving Karen and Chitose alone momentarily.
"I'll… catch you later, I guess," Karen said hurriedly, and turned to go. She was prevented from doing so by a hand on her arm, a grip that seemed to clamp like a metal cuff tightly around her elbow despite the slenderness of the fingers comprising it.
A soft murmur breathed near her ear, swiftly raising the hackles on her neck. "Is it embarrassing to be seen around me, Karen-san?" the murmur asked.
"What? No, of course not!" Karen turned back to find that the smile, though still plastered on Chitose's lips, had drained from her eyes, leaving them doused in what could only be described as melancholy. "I just… haven't told Rin about you yet, so I… yeah. My bad, Chitose-san. My mouth kinda just slipped."
"I don't mind you referring to me by my last name, if you so wish – those are merely irrelevant details, in my view. I'd just hoped you would act a little less reticent in my company." She let go of Karen's arm and patted her shoulder. "But I understand such things take time, and you are right to be discerning in who you speak about my condition to. It wasn't my intention to make you feel bad for doing so. For that, I apologize."
"Don't be sorry. Please. It's my fault."
"No, no. The fault is mine."
They stared at each other for a moment. Then, an amused grin crept onto Chitose's face. Karen unwittingly found herself returning the expression.
"There's plenty enough blame to pass around if we go chasing after it," Chitose observed. "Let's leave it at that."
Karen laughed. "Yeah, you're right."
"Anyway, I won't keep you. Kamiya-san and Shibuya-san are waiting." She motioned towards the end of the hallway, where Rin and Nao were twiddling their thumbs, shooting inquisitive glances their way. "By the way, if Shibuya-san asks, just tell her the truth. All of it."
"But wouldn't you—"
"I don't mind. Any friend of yours is a friend of mine." Chitose winked. "I will catch you later as well." She slipped into the gym and closed the door behind her, leaving Karen to shrug and rejoin her troupe.
Though nothing was said as they took the lift down and left the building, Karen could tell the other two, especially Rin, had several questions queuing up at the tips of their tongues. However, she also knew it would take more than a few idle words on their way to the nearby family restaurant to explain everything, and so when Rin finally broached the topic of how exactly Karen had come to know Chitose, she responded only with, "I'll tell you over lunch."
As they sat down, ordered their food and began to eat, Karen explained everything to Rin, starting from their initial encounter with Chiyo and the bombshell the Producer had then dropped on them, all the way to what had transpired the night before – though Karen saw fit to leave out the part about her crying, which in hindsight seemed just a touch pathetic on her part. When she finished, Rin sat quietly for a while, munching on her steak as she ruminated, her thin eyebrows crossed in worry. Upon noticing that Karen and Nao were staring at her, she gulped down her food and sheepishly held a hand up to her mouth.
"Sorry," she said. "I was just thinking."
"That's not like you," Karen noted.
Rin squinted at her. "What, me thinking? Because you two are such brainiacs, of course."
"No, silly. I meant not having anything to say."
"That's because I think before I talk. Don't you two do that?"
"I certainly do. I dunno about Nao, but…" Karen ducked away from the irritated swipe Nao aimed at her and added, "I get you. It's… not an easy thing to talk about. Especially since I'm here."
Rin shook her head. "It wouldn't make it any easier even if you weren't around. Besides, I hate talking behind people's backs, and it's no different with Kurosaki-san. I just don't wanna comment until I know her better, I guess." She paused. "I will say this one thing: there's no 'just helping out' when it comes to people who are near the end of their lives. You'll inevitably get sucked in, and you have to be ready to give more of yourself to Kurosaki-san than you'd necessarily want to. Particularly when… you know. When the time comes."
No one at 765 Production was known more for dishing out hard truths than Rin Shibuya, and so it now proved. Yet Karen also knew she wasn't going to give up on Kurosaki-san without a fight. Not when she'd gone through so much just to make her acquaintance. The time and effort she put into her relationship with the mysterious mistress and her equally secretive servant would be worth it – both for the two of them, and for Karen herself as well. Of that she was absolutely sure.
"I've prepared myself for that," she said. "For better or worse."
Rin nodded. "I believe you. I just wanted to make sure. You've been through a lot, after all." Her normally stoic gaze softened. "If you ever wanna talk, I'm all ears. I'm sure Nao is, too."
"You bet I am," Nao immediately replied, before looking away and muttering, "I mean, it wasn't like I was gonna say no, right? What kinda friend would I be if I did?"
"That's exactly right." Rin playfully tousled Nao's fluffy crown despite her halfhearted protests, before moving on to her neck and shoulders and eliciting a startled yelp that rapidly descended into babbling laughter. "There you have it, Karen. Just don't get too distracted, okay? You've still got idol stuff to think about at the end of the day."
Karen looked over at her two best friends, one trying desperately – and failing miserably – to extricate herself from the unremitting tickling of the other, and chuckled.
"Yeah, you got it."