Hello! :)

Here's the long-awaited update! Apologies about how long it's taken.

At first it was because I was super busy, but then I was hit hard with writer's block, which is kind of new; I've never really experienced it that much.

I needed a way to link what just happened and the next part of the plot, and ended up writing 3 chapters, before scrapping them all and eventually ending up with this. There was always going to be a time jump around here, but I wasn't planning on doing it like this. You'll learn more about what happened in the time jump (which was ~four months long, by the way) throughout the next few chapters, while one of our favourites deals with a secret problem that may or may not cause quite a lot of trouble in the future...

Anyway...I hope you enjoy! :)

"So...divorced."

"Divorced." Meredith repeated.

Her lawyer smiled at the word. She didn't often do that, because normally a divorce was a bad thing for both parties. When there were kids involved, that just made it a hundred times worse. But today, she wasn't saddened at that word; although Ethan was never charged with anything related to domestic abuse, she knew what the man had done to Meredith, and it felt good to know that she was now free from him.

"So...is it all completely done now?" She asked tentatively.

"You never have to see me again." Jessie said, keeping her smile. "Unless you do fancy discussing what he did to you. I'd be happy to represent you if you wanted to report him and get him charged."

"Twenty-seven years is...it's a long time." She replied. "As much I want to add another ten years..."

"It's not worth the stress?" Jessie assumed.

"I'm trying to put him behind me. I did that before and then he came back so now...I just want him gone. Then I can go back to living again."

"Well, Meredith, your paperwork is finished, so you can officially go back to living again." She replied. "And you're free to marry again, of course. I remember meeting your boyfriend, he seemed very smitten with you."

"Mmm. Maybe one day."

"Court cases are hard on couples, Meredith. You're stressed, and he's stressed for you. Don't feel worried if you're going through a rough patch right now; not many couples can handle it without a little conflict." She replied, reading her tone. It told her that the idea of marrying Derek wasn't something she was even thinking about right now.

"Right. Okay." She agreed half-heartedly.

"Meredith, I promise, you're not the only couple to get stressed. In fact, I've never not had a couple get extremely stressed and pull away from one-another a little."

"Thanks. It's reassuring to know we're not the only ones." She lied.

"Well, goodbye, Meredith."

She smiled. "Hope to never see you again, in the nicest way possible."

Derek had been stroking their dog for at least fifteen minutes. She had entered his house, dumped her stuff and then gone looking for him. She had found him, completely unfocused, stroking Lucky. So she'd sighed, and headed back to the kitchen. Fifteen minutes later, when she checked on him again, he was still stroking the dog. This time, she didn't leave.

"You doing okay?" She asked, hoping he'd actually note her presence this time.

He looked up, and was surprised to find her in the room. The second he did, however, a smile appeared on his face. "Yeah. Fine."

"You sure? You looked very...blank and thinky a second ago?"

"Thinky?" He repeated.

"Like you were deep in thought." She explained, although he had probably figured that out.

"Just thinking about work. How did it go today?"

"I am divorced."

He smiled, just a little. "Completely?"

"Mmm mmm. Completely divorced. Legally, religiously, mentally - except I did that like three years ago." She replied. "And then I went to work and stuck an IM rod in someone's femur."

"Really?" He asked, visably impressed.

She smiled as she sat down on the bed next to him. "Yeah. I wasn't lead-lead, obviously, even though I'm not a first year anymore, but I did get to do the important stuff."

He kissed her on the cheek. "Proud of you." He replied with a genuine smile before moving his eyes back to Lucky as she stretched out a little.

He was avoiding her. He didn't want to look at her, because he knew it was harder to lie when they were looking at each other.

"Derek."

"Mmm?" He muttered, not looking up.

She swallowed. "I wish you would tell me what's eating you up inside. I wish you'd let me in."

He looked up, and for a second, she could see it in his eye. The pain. The sadness. The stress. The fear. The desperate plea for help. But then he was smiling again. "Meredith, I promise you, I'm fine."

Crap.

There was nothing else to think really.

Not at...that.

Not at what was going on.

There would never be anything to do or say in the face ofthissituation.

This horrendous situation.

So she slammed the door, and scrubbed her face with her hand.

She couldn't believe she'd just done that.

She swallowed, and eventually called, "I'm so, so sorry!"

No one responded.

She supposed that they were too embarrassed to. Honestly, she wasn't sure how she got anything out, considering how filled she was with the same feeling. She sat down on the couch, and waited about ten seconds before she heard the sound of the bedroom door opening.

Meredith smiled awkwardly as she greeted her with a static wave. "Hi. Sorry."

"No.Iam so, sorry. I should have knocked or something." Addison apologized.

"No, no. We knew you were coming." She said as she pulled her dressing gown tighter to her body. Her otherwise-naked body. "We shouldn't have been doing...that. Apologies."

"Believe me, I get it." She smiled. "Seriously."

"Oh...yeah, right." Meredith agreed. She had forgotten that the pair used to be together. The last time she had seen the woman was at the prom, so this was the first time she was meeting her as 'Derek's girlfriend', which was...well, only extremely embarrassing, especially considering what they had just been caught doing.

She smiled. "Yeah. I promise I get it. I mean I can't speak for what it's like nowadays but...let's just say me and Derek had been caught at least twice because- I mean, who can resist that?"

"Oh, poor Dr Price." Derek sighed.

The pair both turned round at the second greeting. Derek had quickly slipped on a t-shirt, but had just chucked a blanket over his lap. It wasn't surprising, as both of them knew that it would take him more than thirty seconds to get out bed and get his bottom half changed. Or not changed, considering the fact he wasn't wearing anything before that.

She smiled at the memory. He'd found them sneaking out of a store cupboard once when they were on a rotation at the hospital in med school, and looked rather alarm when he spotted the pair.

"Hi." He greeted.

"I was just talking to Meredith about how extremely awkward this is." Addison returned.

He just about smiled. "Yeah. I am...so sorry."

"Do you want me to leave so you could finish?" She teased.

"We were on our fourth anyway. It's fine." He joked.

"Fourth round?" She asked with raised eyebrows.

He smirked. "Second, actually. I was kidding...partially."

"Okay then..." She agreed, not quite sure whether he was joking or not. "Well...would someone like to make me some breakfast after my awfully long and treacherous flight, or shall we just continue to awkwardly talk about sex?

Meredith smirked. "Breakfast, please, for the love of good."

"Hi, Dr Shepherd!"

He looked round, surprised. "Dr Stockly! Hey."

"Long time no see."

"Yeah. It's been while." Derek said with smile. Dr Stockly was a resident a few years ago that, after a long mental battle, had gone with cardio over neuro. Derek was disappointed, but he was now thriving in his non-neuro speciality.

"What are you doing at Seattle Pres? Oh-" He smiled as the idea entered his mind. "Are you here to perform a surgery? Can I watch? Will you let me scrub in? I know I abandoned you and all but-"

"Not here for a surgery."

"So why are you here?"

He swallowed. "Um...personal matters."

"Oh. Oh, God. I'm so sorry. That was probably so insensitive then, wasn't it?"

"No, no. It's okay. I get why you assumed."

"Bad personal matters?" He asked tentatively after a few seconds.

"Well..." He gestured to his right. "Not good personal matters-"

He swallowed as he looked at the sign he had signaled to. "Oh, god. I'm so sorry. How um...how bad is it?"

"She'll survive. Hopefully."

"Meredith said you're doing okay." She said as she joined him in the kitchen where he was washing up dinner's dishes.

"Yeah." He agreed.

"So this promise you made me not to bottle up your feelings is gone now, huh?"

"I..." He swallowed. "I don't know what you mean."

"Are you coping with your emotions with sex?" She asked, seeing as that was the obvious question.

"No. I just...we just enjoy it." He explained truthfully. He wasn't looking at her, simply focusing on the dishes, but Addison was fine with that. She could generally hear a lie anyway.

"But you do have emotions that you are struggling to cope with?"

"How would I not have emotions after...that night and- well, last week too."

She almost felt like rolling her eyes. Did she really have to prompt him for each detail? "And these emotions that you feel...are they emotions you are struggling to cope with?"

"Sex is easy." He said, which seemed like an out-of-the-blue statement to her.

"What?" She asked, confused.

"I'm not using sex as a coping mechanism. But...it's-"

"Easier than talking about what's going on in your head?" She suggested.

He didn't answer for a long second before nodding.

"You can stay...close while-" She paused, thinking. "You can stay close while being distant too. She doesn't think she's losing you even though...she kind of is."

"I'm trying. I really am trying."

"Do you still love her?"

He looked at her instantly at that. He looked almost...offended by the question. "Of course I do."

"So you're not distant because you're falling out of love with her and you don't know how to tell her?"

"No. Not at all. I love her. I love her as much as I did the day I fell in love with her- more, perhaps but..." He sighed as he gave up on his words.

"So if it isn't that...what is it?"

"It's..." He swallowed. "It's because of the real reason I asked you to come here. I know I said I wanted support for last week but...it-" He sighed. "It's something else I need you for, Addie."