Confessions and Forgiveness

Kanda emerged from his room not long after, Mugen in tow.

'Is the rat man coming?' he growled and Kanda snorted, grabbing a cup of coffee and sitting across from Severus who still had his head on the table.

"Rat man should be coming." he answered the kneazle before addressing the top of Severus's hair, "You alright Severus? Anxious?"

"Huh? Oh I suppose?" Snape looked up and frowned. He looked at the time again but kept his head up. He didn't want to express his mini crisis to the cause sitting across from him.

They both jumped at the bell announcing someone at the office door.

"Why did they have to be early today of all days?" Snape grumbled as Kanda smirked and got up, stepping through the door that joined the two spaces to collect the Gryffindors.

"I only just managed to get him into the cage. He didn't seem to want to come" Ron explained as Kanda looked in surprise at all the scratches on the boy's hand.

"I'm not surprised. Come this way" Kanda rolled his eyes and led them to the door to their private rooms.

"Your quarters? Are you sure Kanda? Isn't this a bit, you know, personal?" Hermione asked gently. Kanda shrugged,

"It was Professor Snape who suggested it - the conversation may take a while so we may as well be comfortable. How's Timothy? I don't get to see him much nowadays"

Hermione's blush intrigued him as did Harry and Ron's suppressed laughter,

"He's um doing well. Professor Sprout is keeping him busy" she replied.

"And muddy" Harry added,

"And muscley" Ron continued and Hermione slapped his arm,

"Oi careful, I nearly dropped Scabbers" the redhead chuckled.

"Alright, alright. Come along, children." he ushered them through the door and the trio looked around the earthy-toned room in surprise.

"Were you expecting Dracula's lair?" Severus from where he sat in the furthest armchair as the trio took the sofa, and Kanda the other chair.

"Err" Harry flushed slightly and Hermione rolled her eyes. Ron placed the cage on the coffee table and jumped when Scabbers tried to bump it across. Severus growled and cast a sticking charm to the cage, stilling its movements.

"Drinks?" Kanda asked the room and grabbed five glasses of juice, placing them on the table around the now shivering rat which the trio glanced at in growing concern.

"Now, Potter. I understand that you do not trust me and I accept that - it was, in part, the part that I had to play. Thought that I had to play. But Kanda here has informed me that antagonising you will only make my role harder in the long run" Severus started. Harry looked at the potions professor in surprise.

"Your role sir? What would that be?"

"Maybe you should start from the beginning, Severus. It'll be easier to understand that way" Kanda prompted and Severus nodded, gaining strength from Kanda's gaze.

"Of course. I was in the same year as your parents in Hogwarts but I knew your mother before school began. We grew up in the same neighbourhood and, as the only two magical people in the town, we quickly became friends…"

Severus continued his tale and Kanda turned from him, having heard it all before. He instead watched the trio for their reactions. Hermione and Ron were watching with tense faces and the latter glared at the rat as the name Wormtail came up as one of the Marauders. Harry looked horrified to learn that his father was a bully and his mother so quick to drop a friend, even hearing Snape's admission that they matured later on but he stayed silent, hanging on Snape's every word. When the prophecy was brought up, Harry closed his eyes, knowing what was going to be said. But he didn't rage and continued to listen, holding the hands of his friends tight, seeking comfort.

"I realised that you are not your father and this grudge, based mostly on looks alone, was pointless and, though I may have to be terse with you outside these walls, I didn't want to continue to hate you. I'm still not a nice person. I'm acidic, neurotic and horrendously introverted but I will try to help you whenever I can. I made a promise after all" Severus finished and laid his hands in his lap, his long black hair hiding his face, as he waited for the reaction of the trio. His head jolted up at Harry's audible sniffs. Hermione also looked on the verge of tears and Ron seemed to only be holding in his rage to comfort his friend. The pair rubbed the boy's back as he hiccoughed out,

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I never questioned why you hated me. It was easier to hate you than to question why. I'm sorry my dad was such an arse and I'm sorry I defended him without knowing him. I would never if I'd known. No wonder you went to the Death Eaters."

Snape stared at him in shock,

"Nothing could excuse what I -" he began but it was Ron that cut him off this time,

"It's not excusing you, it's understanding. They made your life hell in the one place you should have been safe, even if you were kids. It's understandable for you to seek power and recognition… I know I would have. I know what it's like to be belittled for who you are and where you come from" the boy admitted.

"If I hadn't had it drilled into my head from the moment that I came here that dark magic was illegal, I probably would have dug deeper into the restricted sections myself. Knowledge is addictive" Hermione admitted. Kanda looked over and felt a pang of pity for the man across from him. Severus looked so confused, his usual poker face eradicated as he tried to get to grips with the lack of hatred.

"They're not angry Severus. They get it" he sympathised. Snape nodded numbly,

"I see that. It's unnerving." he admitted and Harry snorted through his drying tears.

"My father sounds like my cousin Dudley - spoiled and rude. I'm not surprised that you hated me. I wasn't exactly the model student either, so thinking I was the same is pretty justified" he gave a wry smile.

"Mr Potter. You can't just excuse me of all of these -"

"Why not?"

"Why not? I got your parents killed, Potter. I'm the reason they-"

"Did you tell Voldemort where they lived?"

"Well no but -"

"Did you break into their house"

"No"

"Cast the killing curse?"

"No but I may as well have done" Snape muttered, not liking where this conversation was going.

"No, you are not to blame. He was the one to take the prophecy to heart. He was the one who chose my parents, the one that bullied information out of the weak link, the one that killed them, that tried to kill a defenceless child. You were just doing your job and then tried to correct it as soon as you knew something was wrong. Dumbledore had no right to abuse your grief like that" Harry ranted, suddenly angry.

"Calm down Harry." Hermione muttered, pulling him back into the sofa.

"Sorry"

"Potter it's me who should-" Harry silenced Snape with a glare and the professor sighed and held his hands up in surrender. Kanda held in a snort but Snape quirked an eyebrow at him anyway.

"See, told you they wouldn't hate you" he informed the man who rolled his eyes,

"They are perfectly within their rights to do so" he answered and Kanda smiled,

"You're right, they are. And they've decided not to. So accept it" he replied and Severus gave another heavy sigh and nodded.

"What are we going to do with him then?" Ron gestured to Scabbers - Wormtail - still in the cage, shaking.

'Rat man. Can I eat him?' Mugen meowed from his place by the table and Kanda laughed,

"No Mugen, you can't eat him" he answered the cat and the room laughed, some of the tension dissipated.

'Shame' the kneazle pouted.

Hermione tilted her head at the rat, deep in thought.

"Professor Lupin is Moony isn't he. He's the werewolf" she suddenly announced. Snape groaned quietly. He hadn't named the marauders to try and cover the secret and he gave the girl a half-hearted glare,

"You are too smart for your own good Miss Granger" he grumbled.

"Thank you sir" she smirked,

"It wasn't a compliment"

"Yes it was" Kanda remarked and Snape switched his glare to the apprentice. Kanda was slightly annoyed that a 13 year old had figured it out before he had - and in a much shorter time frame - but he had to admit the girl was sharp.

"Of course. He was friends with my parents - of course that would make him a Marauder. And it would explain why you don't like him" Harry connected the dots. He looked up at Severus with a frown,

"Did he bully you too?" he asked quietly. Snape shrugged,

"He didn't stop them, but he also didn't join in very much. Especially after the shack. He was pretty much an outcast so he probably didn't want to lose his only friends" he admitted.

"But by keeping his friends, he sacrificed you" Ron stated and Snape paused before nodding,

"I suppose he did. But those things don't seem as important as fitting in at that age" he told them. The trio seemed to begrudgingly accept this explanation and quietened down once again. Severus eventually looked over at the clock in the kitchen and stood.

"They will be serving dinner soon. You three should return to Gryffindor Tower before then" he warned them. The trio also stood.

"Leave the rat. We'll take him to Dumbledore" Kanda butted in as Ron looked at the cage. He grimaced and nodded.

"Thank you sir, for telling us. I know it must have been pretty uncomfortable." Harry said and Snape nodded.

"You are welcome, and you deserved to know." he told the boy who nodded back.

"Thank you for letting us into your rooms. Should we head through the office?" Hermione asked,

"That would be the easiest way. It will also stop you drawing too much attention. After all, you three have held plenty of detentions in that office over the years. It will almost look normal" Severus drawled and the trio looked at each other and grinned sheepishly. They definitely knew that they were not model students. Kanda chuckled and stood to lead them back into the office but Harry did something that shocked everyone in the room. He walked over to the awkward Head of Slytherin and hugged him.

"I wish you didn't have to return to him"

Kanda's face softened as Snape cautiously brought his arms around the boy and replied,

"If Kanda's friends are successful, then hopefully I won't have to. But, I will probably have to play my part one way or another" he admitted and smiled as Kanda stood beside them and ruffled the boy's hair.

"Come on Harry, let's send you home" Kanda told him.

Hermione and Ron looked stunned at their friend's behaviour. The boy truly did have a heart of gold sometimes. And, as they observed the trio of dark hair, they admitted to themselves that they looked like they could have been family.

Harry seemed to be snapped out of his melancholia and flushed lightly,

"Sorry Professor"

"It is fine Potter" Snape answered just as awkwardly and Kanda chuckled as he turned the mortified boy around and led him and his friends out through the office.

"Hopefully you'll pop by here every now and again." Kanda told the trio as they stood by the office door.

"Do you like Professor Snape, Kanda?" Harry asked him,

"Very much so." he answered with a smile and Harry smiled back,

"If you made him lighten up this much to spill his secrets, I'd say you're good for him" Ron grinned and Kanda flushed lightly, unsure of how to answer. He couldn't exactly tell them that he'd heard the story after only a week of knowing the man. Which made him ponder how long they'd been interested in each other. He was snapped out of his musings by Hermione's voice,

"Stop teasing him, you two. Thank you for talking Professor Snape into this" she told him and Kanda nodded,

"You're welcome. And say hi to Timothy for me" he winked at her and smirked as her face matched Ron's hair, making them all laugh,

"Not you too" she whined,

"Sorry" he chuckled,

"No you're not" she pouted then her face softened "You should see him soon"

"I'll see them all tomorrow. Get back safe" he shooed them out into the corridor and headed back to the living room.