I never used to like hospitals. They used to scare me when I was a child, and that stuck even after I grew up into an adult for a while. Maybe it was because I watched a bunch of horror movies that took place in hospitals, or perhaps it was how sterile and colorless everything tended to be in hospitals. But the most likely reason was because of what happens in hospitals.
What was that one quote? 'Statistically, you're more likely to die in a hospital than anywhere else'? Whether that was true or not, hospitals reeked of illness, decay, and death. Everyone who comes here is in need of help. Sometimes, they're in desperate help. People with broken limbs, covered in blood, dying in slow agony…
It was all such a pitiful sight, I couldn't bear the sight of it. Not one bit. The way it made my stomach churn and how it made my skin feel sickly…It was something I never thought I'd get used to.
It seems so silly now…being worried over pointless things like that.
I continued to stare out the window, watching the rain fall, before I finally sighed. Why is this, of all things, causing my heart to race? There was no reason to worry. It was professionals who had worked on this. Nothing should or could go wrong. They wouldn't have done this if there was a risk of failure, and, even if there was, they would have told me.
I shook away my doubts as I continued to stare at the pouring rain. It had been raining heavily this entire week, and that just made the world look more dreary and drab. I've heard from a few people that rain is supposed to be the tears of God or something like that. I never understood that. The rain isn't bad. It's a beautiful thing. It's necessary. People can sometimes forget that since rain is always used to depict sorrow, when in reality, rain symbolizes life, growth, and change.
Tears of God… As if there's a god watching us from on high. How foolish. The only thing that determines the outcome of the world is the people living in it. For better or for worse, it is the people who create the world. Whatever the people dictate will happen, no matter who complains, and no matter if what they want only destroys them. That's just how people are.
Staring at the rain, I couldn't help but ponder more about the current state of things. We were living in an unprecedented time of peace. There were no wars. There was no conflict. Even all the nations of the world were getting along for the most part, or at least, they weren't antagonizing each other like they used to. It has been so long since tragedy struck that people have forgotten that bad things have happened. It's almost like history has been erased with how forgetful they are.
They've forgotten about wars. They've forgotten about poverty. They've forgotten about sickness and plagues. They've forgotten about persecution and discrimination. They've forgotten genocides.
In truth, the people of the world have forgotten that evil even exists outside of fiction. That cruelty was first born from a living, breathing human in reality and not from words depicting a fantastical world and people. All they know is what the world is now, this peaceful, calm, wonderful world free from all of that ugliness that makes up half of humanity.
They choose to blind themselves to the truth, instead choosing to consume fiction and hope to cover up the cracks in the mirror that is reality. If they don't, then they would realize that they are just as flawed as the characters they adore, and perhaps even more so. They'd realize that everything bad that ever happened was because of people just like them. That the problem isn't because of talented people or evil people or rich people or poor people or well-off people or even normal people, but that the problem is with humanity itself. They'd realize the problem is that humans in general, while we may try to be good, are instinctively evil. That's why as children we all need to be taught to be good and then be enforced to be good by our parents. They all refuse to see that.
So to prevent that truth from being realized, they instead indulge themselves with the misfortune of the fictional characters shown to them on the screens. They partake in their suffering, in their struggles, and even in their despair. Yet, they also partake in their strength, in their passion, in their conviction, and especially in their hope. This is the people's salvation. This is how peace has come about, and if it continues like this, the peace will never end.
But was it real peace, or just fictional, just like those characters on the screen?
It's quite sad when you realize the truth of the matter, and yet, it's necessary. Many will deny it, but sometimes bad things, and sometimes evil things, must be done for the sake of progress. For the sake of others. For the sake of the greater good.
Cures to monstrous diseases are only able to be made once they are tested on living creatures, starting from animals and then to humans, despite the risks that might be involved. Sometimes the only way to win a war to prevent millions and millions of deaths is to destroy a city full of hundreds of thousands of people to get the enemy to surrender. Sometimes, one person must die in order for the rest to live.
People will try to stand on their high horses and speak out that such reasoning is wrong or immoral. That the ends do not justify the means. That two wrongs don't make a right. That a peaceful world built on the blood of others is not true peace.
Let me ask them this, then. Would you rather go back to before then? To when the world was chaotic and cruel? To when people would kill one another for no other reason than because they could? To when countries started wars with each other for things like land or dominance? To when people were afraid and scared because, at any moment, they could die suddenly in the pits of sorrow, pain, and despair?
What difference is there in a world like this when the old world was built on bloodshed in wars and atrocities? If this peaceful world is built on blood, then what was the old world built on? As far as I can tell, they both were the same with how much blood was shed to make them.
And if you do want to go back, how would you do it? The system that has been built is irrevocably intertwined with the world itself. It's the world's bloodstream now. It's heart. It's mind. It's soul. How would you ever remove something like that?
The answer is you can't. You can never remove an essential part of a working machine, organization, or living being. If you do, the machine will break down, the organization will fall apart, and the living being will die. There is no perfect solution like they want to believe. This is what our world is now, and this is what it will be for the foreseeable future. It is necessary.
It was only then that I realized that I had zoned out. I blinked my now burning eyes as I shook my head again. I'm distracting myself again. That couldn't be helped, I suppose. Not when I consider what was happening.
I was currently sitting in a hospital in one of the rooms, waiting for my friend to awaken from his slumber. The doctors had just brought him out of intensive surgery, so my nerves were still quite high. Thankfully, though, things seemed to have gone well, and now he was sleeping peacefully in front of me.
I turned to the patient in question and couldn't help but laugh. There, laying on the bed in a deep, undisturbed, peaceful slumber, was my friend. Rin Wakuri. That was the name attached to the young man. Truthfully, He was still only a child, a teenager really, but he looked more mature than others his age, even while he slept.
He wasn't wearing his usual outfit, only having on a hospital gown and lying under the hospital bed's sheets, but I could recognize that face. He looked no different from who I had met all those years ago. He had that messy white hair and that ridiculous cowlick. Actually, they call those things ahoges, don't they?
The only difference now was the very, very faint scars he now had across his body that I could see. There were probably more under the gown, too. They most likely came from the surgery, though I don't know Rin as well as I should, so perhaps some of them came from before the surgery. He has been through a lot recently.
I couldn't help but smile slightly as I stared at the sleeping form of Rin in front of me. I didn't want to wake him up yet. He's had it rough, so he needs as much rest as he can get before anything else. That means I might not be able to speak with him before I am forced to leave, but I'd be fine with that.
I got to see that he's fine. That's all I wanted.
Still, even if he looks fine, there might be something wrong with him still. After what happened…and after the surgery, there's a lot that could be wrong with him, whether physically or mentally. It should be fine, but he just went through things that would break normal people. I can only hope he was strong enough to overcome all of that.
I frowned before I let out a tense breath. All I could do was hope.
How ironic is that? I hate this, being powerless at this moment, but that's all I can do.
So I continued to wait. I waited, and waited, and waited. Seconds passed, and then minutes, and then an hour. It was around that point when I was starting to nod off myself that something startling happened.
Rin woke up, and seconds after slowly opening his crimson eyes and staring blankly at the ceiling, his eyes quickly shot open in terror as he began to scream. It was a visceral scream of pure terror and panic as he thrashed about in the bed, swinging his arms and legs around as if trying to fight off something.
I shot up from my chair and dashed over to Rin's side and grabbed him to get him to stop trashing.
"Stop! Stop! You're okay now! You're not in danger!" I shouted as I forced Rin to stay still (mostly).
It took a while, but after I managed to get him to stop moving and look at me, I repeated myself as much as necessary until he finally seemed to relax and calm down. Tension seemed to release from his body as he sank back into the soft mattress. He took deep, exhausted breaths before opening his crimson eyes again and aiming them at me.
"Who…are you?" He asked.
"Huh? You don't remember me?" I asked in a shocked voice.
"N-No, not really." Rin shook his head before holding his head. "Well, I don't think I recall most things right now. I can't even remember my name or who I was or why I'm here."
"O-Oh…" I frowned. No, of course he wouldn't remember. What was I expecting? "That…must be a side effect."
"Side effect?" Rin questioned with a raised eyebrow.
"You just got out of intensive surgery. Perhaps you're still weary from the experience. The doctors probably had to use some strong stuff on you to keep you out as they did their work."
"I-Is that so? Then what happened to me for that kind of surgery to be needed?"
"Maybe it'd be better to make sure you remember everything before all that. You said you couldn't remember who you were, correct?"
"Th-That's right…"
"Well…" I paused for a moment, biting my lower lips nervously before continuing slowly so he could easily follow. "You're name is Rin Wakuri. Do you remember that name?"
"Rin…Wakuri…" He muttered before nodding. "Yeah. I remember it. I…don't really feel anything with it, though. Is that normal?"
"You're probably just feeling disconnected from it. You must still be in a bit of shock, but I'm sure it'll feel right after a bit. Now then, about you…" I hummed a little. "I'd say the most important thing about you is that you're an Ultimate."
"Ultimate? As in Ultimate Talent?" Rin asked before placing a hand to his mouth. "Wait…I…I think I remember that. I definitely had an Ultimate Talent. I remember the Ultimate Initiative coming to me and forcing me to take a title." Rin showed a snarl full of hatred as he continued. "I remember exactly how I felt, too. How shocked and appalled I felt at the utter gall they had to offer me that title after what almost happened to me. It still sickens me!"
"So you do remember your life before now," I noted with a smile. "That's good. That shows you still have all your memories jumbled around in that head of yours." I then tapped my chin a few times. "Let's see… What else…? Do you remember your friends?"
"Friends?"
"Yeah, friends. Yuna, Hibiki, Ayumu? Ring any bells?"
"Kind of… It's sort of fuzzy." Rin hummed before frowning. "For some reason…those names…make me feel sad."
"Okay, then. That makes sense considering what happened to them." I muttered. "How about…Shinon? Do you remember that name?"
"Shinon? No, not at all. Is it important to me?"
"...No. It isn't. Just forget it. Then what about… Asuka?" I asked wearily.
"Asuka? A…suka? Asuka…Wada…" Rin began to mumble, but then his eyes bulged again as he shot up from his bed and stood up looking around in a panic. "Wait, I remember now!" He shouted before he spun his head around. "Where is she?! Asuka! Where is she? And the others! Sora, Takumi, Osamu, Masuyo! What happened to them!?"
"Whoa, whoa, relax! You said you remember everything?"
"Y-Yeah. I remember…a ship. A huge cruise ship, and we all were trapped on it. It became a living hell, and there was so much death. I tried to stop it, but then…there was a fight. My arm broke, but then…there was a fire. And then…but…then…"
Rin then grew pale as he clutched his shoulders in a death grip as fear and pain flashed in his eyes.
"Pain. There was so much pain! I can remember it so…vividly. I still feel it. Like there are blades stabbing all over me…! How am I–?"
"Oh, so maybe that's what those are from."
"H-Huh? What?"
"Those scars on you. I was wondering about that, though it could still be from the surgery." I noted, unfazed by how Rin's eyes seemed to bulge as he looked down at himself, lightly tapping the blemished skin in horror and disbelief.
"W-What happened to me!? Should I…even be alive right now? Did…I fail? Did we fail? That must be the case. It gets fuzzy near the end, but I remember bits of what happened clearly. Something bad happened, and then…the pain followed. Does that mean that I–"
"I can't say too much about that." I cut him off. "I'm not fully informed on it. However, you are alive. You're alive now, so it's fine. You could say that you were lucky enough to be saved from that fate you are probably imagining. I mean, what you're imagining isn't possible since you're still alive right now, right? So what happened then doesn't matter anymore. I imagine the pain you must be feeling is only a phantom pain. A memory. The scars should fade with time, too. It is only temporary, but you'll still be here, stronger for it."
"B-But that doesn't explain parts of what I remember," Rin argued before holding his head again. "Not that I fully remember it. It's all hazy, like a fog. I can only remember shapes and colors in regards to the end, and a few sensations. But I clearly remember being on that ship and the hell I was put through. But…you said I was saved? If I'm here, in some hospital, then I guess that does mean I was rescued somehow, but how'd I get here? How was I saved? What exactly happened?"
"Who knows? I'm sure you'll remember eventually, but even if you don't, would that be a bad thing? Sometimes memories only hurt people. Would you truly want to remember something cruel like that?"
"I don't really get what you're talking about. Why would remembering be bad? Nothing is more important than the truth, right? I'd rather have the truth and suffer than be ignorant of it." Rin frowned as his ahoge sagged in a depressed manner. "Anyway, forget my fuzzy memories. You still haven't told me who you are."
"Oh, so you still don't remember? You wound me with such callous statements. To think my dear friend can't even recall my face!"
"Should I? I remember everything before the fire on the ship I was stuck on, so did I meet you sometime after that?" Rin asked. "If I did, I'm sorry. I can't recall your face."
"...I suppose you wouldn't, would you? It makes sense you don't remember me. We haven't really met like this, huh? And even if we did, I'm not really important, so I wouldn't be surprised if you forgot me. I have a pretty forgettable face, after all." I admitted with a small smile. "I just heard someone amazing who I really admire was here, so I dropped by for a visit."
"Is that so… I guess I should thank you, then. It doesn't seem like anyone else came to visit me." Rin let out an awkward chuckle.
"Nah. There's no need for that. Honestly, I'd prefer it if you didn't thank me at all." I held up my hands and waved them defensively while shaking my head. "I haven't done anything worth thanking for. I'm a pretty selfish person, actually."
"But you came to make sure I was okay, didn't you?"
"That was a bit of self-satisfaction. Pay no mind to it." I deny his claim quickly. "Any other questions?"
"Well, since I'm an Ultimate, and you seem to know of me, does that mean you're an Ultimate as well?" Rin asked.
"...Something like that," I admitted.
"Really? What's your talent then?" Rin questioned curiously with a raised eyebrow.
"Can't say. I'm not really supposed to tell anyone. It's supposed to be a secret. If I did tell anyone, my boss would have my head. Though that doesn't make any sense to me, since you'd think with how things are set up that I'd have the say in what happens." I shrugged.
"What do you mean?"
"Just rambling on about the problems with bureaucracy. It gets complicated, but the point is, I can't tell you my name or talent. If I do, I'll get in more trouble. I wasn't actually supposed to even see you. I snuck out to talk with you, though."
"Snuck out? Just to see and speak with me?" Rin blinked a few times in surprise. "Why would you do that? Won't you get in trouble for this?"
"Yeah, but I'm already in trouble. I kind of did something the higher-ups really weren't in favor of, but I did it anyway. Like I said, I'm a pretty selfish person. So since they're already going to punish me, what are they going to do? Punish me more? It doesn't quite work like that. At least, not with me. Being important has its advantages, right?" I laughed.
"Still, you shouldn't have come if you weren't supposed to." Rin frowned.
"Don't worry. This was just a one-time thing. I doubt I'll do anything like this anymore."
"Oh?"
"Yeah… Got a whole lot of new responsibilities now, y'know? I can't keep going off on my own, or I'll cause trouble for everyone. It's just…this was a bit important to me." I admitted while rubbing the back of my head. "I mean, it's you! I'm just…so glad things turned out all right. It's been really weighing on my mind. I was starting to worry I did the wrong things."
"Did the wrong thing?" Rin repeated with a raised eyebrow. "You mean you had something to do with all of this?"
"Oh, well, I suppose I did. I'm the one who had you get that surgery so you could live."
"So…you paid for the procedure that saved my life?"
"More than that. I guess you could say I'm the one in charge of this whole thing, so I was the one who got everyone to kick things into high gear for this."
"So…the only reason they helped me was because you ordered them to."
"That's one way of seeing it, I guess. It's not that people didn't want to save you. It's more like they took one look at you and what needed to be done and immediately thought it was a hopeless endeavor. I don't think I can properly explain how risky and desperate this whole procedure was. No one thought it would work as well as it did. By all accounts, you were a lost cause."
"Then…the reason I'm still here is because of luck…" Rin lowered his head with a grim expression.
"Something like that, yeah. It took a lot to get here. Cost a lot, too. There's a reason this procedure isn't done often. It's only been performed a handful of times including your case if that tells you anything." I nodded before leaning back and tapping my leg. "But that's enough dreary talk. Things are already gloomy enough with the torrent of rain we've been dealing with for the past week."
"Rain?" Rin muttered as he turned to look out the window, his eyes widening as he stared in awe. "Wow…It feels like it's been forever since I've even seen rain."
"After that hellish experience you've been through, I imagine it certainly felt like an eternity." I mused with a chuckle. "Anyway, so you pretty much remember everything, yeah?"
"I-I think so. Some things are still hazy, but I think I'll remember eventually."
"Good. Then things went perfectly." I gave a forced smile. "Good to have you back, Mister Wakuri."
"Y-Yeah. Good to be back, I guess." Rin nodded before he stopped for a moment. "Hang on, what day even is it now? With everything that's happened, I sort of lost my sense of time. Couldn't really see the date before."
"Ah…well…" I trailed off as I averted my eyes. "It's…complicated."
"What do you mean?" Rin asked cautiously.
"I mean that I don't really know how to explain how long you were gone," I admitted.
"Gone? What? Was I gone for a long time before you guys found me?"
"...Something like that." I sighed before I felt my phone vibrate. I took it out and frowned deeply when I saw who was calling me. "Oh, here we go…"
"What's wrong?"
"It seems I've finally been found out." I sighed as I got up. "Sorry, but it seems our discussion will have to end here. I'll get the doctors to check up on you before I leave. Maybe they'll be able to answer any other questions you have. Maybe get you a newspaper or something. That should help you get more of your bearings. Although, I'll ask again. Are you sure you want to know everything? Sometimes it's better to not know something. Curiosity killed the cat, after all."
"Thanks, but I'd rather know. I have to know. That's just the kind of person I am. Nothing is more important than the truth." Rin told me confidently. I could see it in his eyes. He meant every word. His eyes shined with that familiar fire of determination.
It seems he still has that trait inside him despite what happened, or was that always going to happen? I wonder…
He should really know by now how often that fire of his tends to burn himself.
"Alright, then I'll send them your way so you can pester them all you like." I laughed.
"Thank you. I appriciate it…uh…" Rin then frowned before looking at me. "Hey. You never gave me your name. What should I call you?"
"...I don't…" I paused before I finally sighed. "...Izuru."
"Oh? Izuru, huh?"
"Yep. That's the name I was given. It's…all I have now, really." I gave a weak laugh at that. "So be sure to remember it next time we meet, whenever that is. Even if I look like a different person, you better remember my name, kid."
"Don't talk as though I'm some kid. You hardly look older than I am." Rin shot back. "But don't worry. I don't tend to forget the names of people I owe favors to. I'll have to make sure to find you and pay you back once I get out of here."
"You sound as though you expect to be leaving soon. Don't you think you should rest a bit more before that?"
"I get quite restless when I have nothing to do," Rin smirked.
"Then I look forward to you returning the favor. I'm the type who will cash in those kinds of favors, you get ready to pay up, chief. The world still needs someone like you, after all. That's why I did this, so I'll be expecting quite the performance from you in return."
"Sure. I look forward to putting on quite a show for you, then." Rin chuckled. "See ya, Izuru."
"Later, Mister Wakuri."
With one last wave, I left the room. The moment I closed the door behind me, the friendly smile I wore vanished as exhaustion and grim boredom overtook my expression. Time for the fun part. Answering my ringing phone and bringing it up to my ear as I walked away, I forced a sickly cheerfulness and politeness out of my throat as I spoke.
"Hello?"
"Do you have ANY idea how long we've been trying to contact you?"
"I thought I told you all not to bother me on my days off."
"Sir, today isn't one of those days. In fact, today is single-handedly one of the most important days for the company! Why did you suddenly vanish?!"
"On the contrary, today is not that important."
"Today is the launch day for Season 48!"
"Exactly! Season 48. We've been at this for so long that you all have started seeing the seasons as more important than they actually are. They're just seasons of a TV show."
"The most important show in the entire world…"
"Do not take that tone with me. Know your place. You do know who you're talking to, right?"
"Of course, sir. I wouldn't speak to the CEO with anything but the highest respect."
"Sure. Right. That's what I'd call it." I rolled my eyes. "Why is it important that I'm at the office, again? You don't need me to run things, the company has been doing this since before any of us were born."
"But it's expected for the face of the company to make a grand appearance at every season's debut! The people will start asking questions–"
"The people won't care. Not when they're too busy enjoying Danganronpa. We could stick that name onto anything and they'll eat it up even if it's something completely different, like with Ultra Despair Girls."
"Please do not bring that title up. It still stains the company name even now."
"Oh, get over yourself! It was a good game with some flaws, every game has them!" I yelled before sighing. "Whatever. I'll be back in a while, so keep your panties in a twist."
"You had better. And there will be disciplinary actions taken to make sure this never happens again. You already know that, though, don't you? And you know what to expect."
"...Of course," I growled out.
"Good. Remember. You carry the title of the Ultimate Hope of this new generation. You had best keep that in mind next time you go off on a whim. You may be the CEO, but that does not make you invincible, Izuru. Remember what you are and know your place."
With that, they hung up on me, leaving me there in the hallway with a stern look stuck to my face.
"Yeah. Like I don't know that. I know what I am. Why else do they think I'm here doing this for them?"
The world has changed. It has entered a new age of peace. A peace unprecedented before now. All people know is peace, and so they have forgotten evil and vice. Instead, they blind themselves and indulge in hope born from fiction. A fiction I now create.
Some will call me evil, but am I really? I'm only giving people what they want. What they need. It's only logical that something must be given in exchange for such a lovely utopia. People simply don't realize that's the choice they need to make in order to live in a perfect world. If they were aware, would they want it?
In that case, I will be the one to make the ugly choices for them. I will help turn them away from the world's ugliness and cruelty so they can keep on living blissful, happy lives. The lives of the few and unwanted don't matter in comparison. The general public might not agree with that mentality out loud, but inside, they all know it to be true. Why else would people ignore the helpless if it wasn't? Why would they love Danganronpa if it wasn't true?
So I shall lead them. I shall prolong this era of peace and joy. I will grant the people their joy. Their happiness. Their entertainment. Their hope. It is what they want, so who am I to deny them that? Morality doesn't matter when the numbers are high enough or when the cost to preserve it would be too great to bear.
It cannot be stopped, nor can it be destroyed. Those who think otherwise are fools. That's why, even if it costs me my life or humanity, no matter how much of myself I must give or destroy…
Danganronpa will remain, no matter what. I will make sure of it.
So you better not disappoint me…Rin Wakuri. I chose you for a reason, after all. So I look forward to the encore you will eventually give us.
0th Arc: Little Thoughts Born in the Rain
END
A/N: Okay, so to add to what I said about the last chapter being really hard to write, this was also really difficult to write. I hope I did well enough in writing it. I'm also sorry for taking so long to post this chapter. I had it finished for a two weeks now, but right when I was about to post it, I had troubles with posting that delayed it, and then college stuff came up that distracted me. But now it's out, and while I'm still a little conflicted with the chapter, I hope you guys enjoy this little interlude before shit really hits the fan.
Also, I want to thank NeoStarReset for the fanart they made and let me use as the new cover for the story. The art is amazing and so are they! They write 'String Theory', one of the inspirations for this fic, so go check them out if you haven't.
Now with this chapter now done, I can finally start writing the final arc of the story. Exciting stuff.