U.S.S. Portland (CA-33) considered herself a pretty easygoing ship. She thoroughly enjoyed her new life, especially since Indy was back as well and serving alongside her. And the sisters were fortunate in that their wartime experiences weren't coloring their new lives too much, either. Aside from Indy getting depressed every July (she had both Goya and Portland to lean on for emotional support) and Portland getting stiff and achy every November (the Shipgirl-strength Icy Hot developed by the Science!Girls was a godsend), things had been going fairly well.
Portland did patrols like most shipgirls, but her backup role was that of Backup Secretary, meaning she took over the duties of Fleet Secretary when the main person in that role – light carrier Wright – had to take over Admiral duties despite being only a Lieutenant Commander. Normally this wouldn't happen, but seeing as how no other U.S. Navy flag officer wanted the job and the poor, increasingly unhinged individual who currently held the position kept trying to escape…well, needs must, as the British would say.
Now she was making her way to the Admiral's office, having been summoned from having a lie-in on her day off by a stressed-out Wright. She suppressed the urge to pout, as she remembered being disappointed to wake up with only an extremely apologetic note to greet her instead of the incredibly enticing body she'd spent most of the previous night exploring.
As she neared the main building, she noticed a white van parked in front with the words 'Oceanview Sanitarium' on each side. She groaned inwardly; it looked like Admiral Briggs was going 'on sabbatical' yet again.
Sure enough, as she approached the front doors, the man himself came out, being pushed in a wheelchair by an orderly who made Brock Lesnar look scrawny. Briggs appeared to be quite content to be carted off – why wouldn't he? He was escaping the madness, albeit under heavy guard – and was happily using a big spoon to eat from what appeared to be a gallon-size jar of mayonnaise. As Portland approached, he glanced up with an expression that said he was not in at the moment and messages were not currently being taken.
"…Admiral? Sir?" Portland didn't bother saluting; she figured a break in military protocol was the absolute last thing on anyone's mind at the moment.
"I have PUDDING!" Briggs announced with childlike wonder, showing off the huge jar that was filled with vanilla pudding.
Portland glanced over at the trio of shipgirls that had come out of the building with the Admiral: Moskva, who appeared to be one step away from hyperventilating, Wright, whose nuclear-level blush was rivaling the antifouling red paint on her lower hull, and Wright's sister ship Saipan, who had a grin on her face a mile wide.
"See you in a month or so, sir!" Saipan called out, waving.
"Come on, Jeffrey," the orderly pushed the Admiral's wheelchair towards the hospital van. "Let's get you back to the hospital. It's Thursday, and you know what that means."
A review of AEW Dynamite in about five minutes? Portland thought, a British YouTube channel about wrestling coming to mind for some reason.
"It's Salisbury steak night!" Briggs looked like ten Christmases had come at once. "YAHOO!"
As the funny farm transport headed off, Portland turned to the trio that was watching it go.
"What happened?" she asked.
Moskva whimpered, and Wright wrapped an arm around her comfortingly. Saipan grinned wickedly.
"Apparently, Miss Proper Decorum here," she indicated her sister, "decided to violate the rules herself for once and got down and dirty with her girlfriend in Briggs' office."
"Are you serious?" Portland gaped at Wright, who looked beyond mortified. Moskva looked like she wanted to sink again.
Saipan nodded. "Yep! I always knew there was a bad girl inside my sister, trapped by all those rules and regulations, just waiting for the right moment to break out!" She feigned wiping a tear from her eye. "I'm so proud!"
Wright finally found her voice.
"Shut up!" the light carrier growled at her sister, who was thoroughly enjoying her discomfort. "We thought we were being discreet…we had no idea about the security cameras in the office!"
"Didn't expect Briggs to find the recorded feed, did ya?" Saipan giggled.
Moskva whimpered in mortification, and Wright cuddled her close. "…no," the carrier muttered.
Portland quickly put two and two together and realized why Briggs was going away for a nice long rest.
"The one time I decided to forgo the rules and do something crazy…" Wright moaned.
"Blyad…" Moskva whimpered.
Saipan pulled her sister back inside the building, meaning Moskva followed as well. Portland walked behind them, figuring that with the way things were going, Wright might end up taking a personal day as well, leaving Portland – who was only a Lieutenant – in charge.
As the popular phrase around there went, needs must.
When the group arrived back in what was normally Wright's office, they were met by the office manager, U.S. Marine Corps Master Sergeant Marquez.
"Ma'am," he addressed Wright, "You have a message from a Mr. Ed Powers…he's head of a film production company out in California and he's offering money to buy some security camera footage from headquarters."
"URK!" Wright twitched.
Saipan choked back hysterical laughter.
On Moskva's bridge, Captain 1st Rank Anton Kuprin was receiving frantic calls from the Chief Engineer about redlining boilers.
Marquez continued. "He gave me a pitch for something called Naughty Shipgirl Secretaries, but I brushed him off and told him he'd have to talk to you. He said he'd call back."
Wright looked like she wanted to scuttle herself and simply pulled Moskva onto her lap to cuddle like a nuclear-blushing teddy bear.
"Blyad…" For her part, the cruiser clung to the carrier and whimpered.
Portland decided to take charge.
"I'll answer the phones today," she informed Marquez, who nodded and left for his own office just down the hall. "Commander," she addressed Wright, "why don't you go into the Admiral's office and relax for a bit?"
"Isn't that what started this whole mess in the first place? 'Relaxing' in the Admiral's office?" Saipan's smirk said she knew exactly what kind of reaction that little comment would get.
Wright gave her sister ship a black look and flounced into Briggs' office, pulling her near-catatonic girlfriend behind her and then slamming the door as Saipan cackled.
"I love my sister to death, but she always gets on me about my crazy stunts. Now the shoe's on the other foot, and I'm not wasting a second of this." She then caught Portland off-guard by suddenly straddling the cruiser's lap and kissing her deeply.
"Sorry I left this morning," she purred, "but Wright texted me with this 'issue' and thought I might provide help for some reason. For all the good that did," she giggled.
Portland shrugged. "No need to apologize…I'd have done the same if Indy had needed me. When you only have one sister ship, you tend to be close to them."
Saipan nodded. "I still wanna make it up to you." She leaned in and murmured in Portland's ear. "Can I come by your room tonight? Maybe tomorrow we can wake up like we should've today."
Portland nodded, giving a promising grin of her own. "Definitely."
Saipan gave her a final quick kiss and slipped off her lap. "Take a nap at lunch and eat a big dinner," she told her past and future playmate. "Tonight's going to be just as long as last night was."
With that, she was gone, and Portland couldn't help but hope that the day passed quickly.