Hello! I hope you enjoy! Next chapter should be up in about 2 weeks.
Warnings: Incest, Anal fingering, Prostate massage, also drama.
A Family Affair
Chapter 17
"Tell them?" Itachi repeated. Like he didn't quite understand what Sasuke had said. "You mean, about us?"
"I know, I know; it's crazy," Sasuke answered quickly, holding his hands up as if he needed to placate Itachi. "I mean, I know, but hear me out, okay?"
Itachi's tongue darted out to wet his lips as he looked Sasuke over, thinking about it. Then he nodded. "But not out here," Itachi said. He motioned with a nod toward the door before going inside. Sasuke followed, shutting the door behind them.
"Okay, now… Tell me what you mean," Itachi said when he turned back around to look at Sasuke.
Sasuke nodded, taking a breath before he started. "Well, I was thinking about it, and, I mean, if we're already pretty sure that Naruto's going to do it on Monday, then…why let him? I mean, maybe we could, I dunno, like—"
"Get out in front of it?" Itachi offered when Sasuke started to fumble for words.
"Yes, exactly!" he exclaimed, pointing at Itachi. "If we could get out in front of it—if we told them first, then maybe… I mean, maybe…"
"We take away Naruto's power," Itachi finished.
Sasuke hummed affirmatively, thankful that his brother understood his meaning. "It's a bad idea, I know. But it's the only one we've got right now."
Itachi nodded, but he didn't say anything in reply. He didn't even look at Sasuke, just past him—through him like he had for years. But Sasuke didn't take it personally. After all, he understood the weight of what he'd just laid on Itachi. So, it was only natural that he needed to think.
And pace.
Which was exactly what he started to do, walking the length of their living room over and over again. For minutes. Until Sasuke stepped closer and reached out, touching his arm when Itachi was in the middle of making another pass—stopping his brother in his tracks.
"Itachi," he said softly. "We don't have to. I mean, it was just an idea, but—"
"But you're right," Itachi said. "It's a long shot, but it could work. To stop Naruto from telling everyone, I mean. But, Sasuke…" Itachi looked at him and frowned. "You've finally gotten to a, well — he shrugged — maybe not exactly good, but better place with mom and dad. If we do this, then it'll be ruined."
"It's going to be ruined either way, Itachi," Sasuke reminded him. "But at least if I do it—if we do it, then we can control it. At least a little bit."
"You're right," Itachi said again. "Of course, you're right. I just…" He reached up to caress Sasuke's cheek. "Are you sure this is what you want to do?"
Sasuke put his hand on top of Itachi's, leaning into his brother's touch. Laying a kiss on his wrist. "I'm sure," he whispered. Then he let out a little laugh. "After all, mom's been dying to meet my boyfriend."
Itachi chuckled, but Sasuke didn't think his brother really found it funny. "Well, let's just hope I'm not the one dying by the end of the conversation."
"I'm not going to let anybody hurt you," Sasuke promised, pulling Itachi close so he could wrap his arms around him.
"I feel like I should be saying that to you," Itachi murmured against his hair as he hugged Sasuke back tightly.
"You've already protected me, Itachi," Sasuke said. "From Naruto, remember?"
Itachi scoffed. "Promise me you won't mention that to mom and dad, okay?"
Sasuke pulled away from Itachi and gave him a little smile. "I promise."
"Good, thank you."
As Itachi said that, Sasuke could see and feel a little bit of the tension leaving his brother as his shoulders relaxed and he stood a little taller. It wasn't gone, by any means, but it was obvious that Itachi had decided that he wouldn't let his worries control him. At least, not right now.
"When do we tell them, though?" Itachi asked.
"The morning?" Sasuke offered with a half-hearted shrug. "Better to do it sooner rather than later, right? Get it over with."
"Right," Itachi agreed. He glanced at the room around them, sighing softly. "I guess that means we need to head back to Konoha, then."
"Yeah, I think so, but we'll be back soon." Sasuke slipped his hand into Itachi's. "And when we are, then this will be home."
Itachi smiled to himself. "You're my home, Sasuke."
"And you're my cheesy boyfriend," he teased, bumping his shoulder against Itachi's. But he smiled when Itachi looked over at him, adding softly, "But you're my home, too, Itachi. You always have been."
"Now whose cheesy?" Itachi said playfully, sticking his tongue out at Sasuke after Sasuke stuck his out first.
They laughed and kissed each other. Enjoying a final moment before they had to go.
XxX
They got back to Konoha around 2:00 AM. Despite the early hour, neither of them were really tired, so they decided to shower first before trying to go to sleep. Itachi went first and Sasuke followed, changing into some of his brother's sweatpants to sleep in strictly because he could. But also because the few clothes he had brought last week had all been worn now and not yet washed.
Once he was out of the shower, Sasuke went into Itachi's room, smiling when he found his brother in bed reading.
"Is it a good book?" he asked conversationally as he tossed his dirty clothes into Itachi's laundry basket. Making a note to himself as he did so to start some laundry at some point later in the day. "I don't remember anything about it from when you read to me last night—no, the…night before last now?"
"It's alright," Itachi answered, giving a small shrug as he put his e-reader down. "But if I'm being honest, I haven't been paying attention to a single thing on that screen. I think I'm just a little too distracted to pay attention to my book right now."
"I get that," Sasuke said, nodding.
And he did.
After all, the ride back to Konoha had been mostly silent. Punctuated by only the random comment on the late night traffic or Itachi's taste in music when his brother put on some pop/punk playlist from his phone. (Which, for the record, Sasuke didn't dislike. He'd just found it strange that his brother didn't listen to, like, exclusively classical music—an idea that Itachi had scoffed at.)
So, no, he wasn't remotely surprised that Itachi was still distracted. Sasuke was, too. To the point that all he'd thought about his entire shower was how he was possibly going to broach the subject at hand with their parents in the morning while playing out possible ways the conversation could go.
Surprise, surprise—none of them went well.
But he didn't bring that up to Itachi. Not because he didn't want to, but because he knew if he did then they would both probably just end up agonizing over it the rest of the night. And, even if they didn't particularly feel like it, Sasuke knew they should try to get a little sleep.
So he moved over to the right side — his side — of the bed and got in, pulling the covers up to his waist as he sat next to his brother.
"It'll be okay, Itachi," he said softly, reaching over to take his hand.
"I know," Itachi murmured, squeezing his hand. "It'll be okay because I have you." Itachi brought Sasuke's hand to his lips so he could kiss his knuckles gently. "And I'll still have you after all this is over."
"Exactly," Sasuke said, returning the sweet gesture by kissing the back of Itachi's hand. "You'll always have me, and nothing will ever take me away from you again. I promise."
A light smiled played at Itachi's lips. "Good," he said, holding Sasuke's gaze for a moment longer before he reached over to turn off the lamp on his bedside table. Plunging them into darkness and declaring their conversation over with a simple flip of a switch.
That was okay with Sasuke, though. In fact, he welcomed the silence as he turned onto his side to face the wall because it meant Itachi would hold him. And, sure enough, once Sasuke was settled, Itachi moved to lay close behind him. He wrapped his arm around Sasuke's waist and pulled him close until as much of Sasuke as possible was pressed against him. Itachi's warmth and embrace made Sasuke smile contentedly to himself and he snuggled just a tiny bit deeper into his pillow.
Ready to sleep.
Hoping to sleep.
Desperate to sleep. To forget for a little while what the light of the morning was going to hold for them.
But after a few minutes, Sasuke was deeply aware that his eyes were still open. That his heart was beating—no, thudding—a little too heavily in his chest. That his body felt prickly like his nerve endings wanted to be on fire but weren't quite there just yet, so he was only slightly uncomfortable.
Which, suffice it to say, meant that he, annoyingly, was wide awake.
So, he did the only thing he could think of. He tried to distract himself. First by counting to one hundred, which was quick, boring, and made him more exasperated than tired. So instead he decided to make a list, trying to take account of what his day would hold once he woke up in the morning—if he ever even got to sleep, that was.
And it was going well. At least at first. With wake up sitting firmly at number one (he was trying to be optimistic, after all) and eat breakfast at number two.
But he very quickly had to stop when the only thing he could think of for number three was:
Ruin my parents' day.
Because, obviously, that was the exact thing he didn't want to be thinking about right now and—
"Sasuke."
"Yeah?" he asked, only a little startled by the sudden rumble of Itachi's voice.
"I can't sleep."
"Me neither."
"I figured," Itachi said. He stroked his hand over Sasuke's outer thigh gently. Bringing Sasuke's attention to the fact that his foot was bouncing restlessly, shaking his entire leg. "You seem anxious."
"Yeah, well, I mean…"
Sasuke shrugged as he willed himself to be still. To breathe. To stop speaking before he said too much. Before he asked the question that was on the tip of his tongue. Dangerous and dying to get out of him.
To keep him awake.
To swallow him alive if he didn't just ask, ask, ASK ALREADY!
"Aren't you scared?"
The question was out of him in a rush a breath, quieter than a whisper, but he knew Itachi heard him. Knew Itachi had probably been expecting the question, in fact. He felt it in the way his brother's hand briefly paused as it stroked across his skin in a bid to comfort him, in the way Itachi tensed ever so slightly behind him. They were pressed too close for anything to be hidden, after all; for even a single breath to be missed.
So it was easy for Sasuke to hear the quiet admission from his brother.
"I'm terrified."
"Me too," Sasuke muttered, looking down at the sheet beneath him. He rubbed his fingers against it absently, trying not to feel relieved by Itachi's answer. By the fact that he wasn't alone in feeling this way—not that he had ever truly thought that he was.
"I think the scariest thing will just be telling them, though," Itachi said, giving him a squeeze.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." He could feel Itachi nod behind him. "I mean, we know how they'll react, don't we? It's not like it's going to go well. But actually telling them…" Itachi blew out a tense breath. It tickled Sasuke's ear and made him shiver.
"How do we even do it?" Sasuke asked as the question he'd been ignoring since he'd come up with this hair-brained plan took over his mind. "Do I just introduce you as my boyfriend? Do I need to come up with a whole thing to say? Give them some kind of warning? Ask them not to be mad?"
"If only it were that easy, right? 'Hey, mom, dad; don't be mad, but…'" Itachi chuckled darkly, humorlessly, angrily. "'My brother's been screwing me.'"
"Hey, don't say it like that," Sasuke said softly. Frowning at the bitter, almost disgusted tone of Itachi's voice.
Itachi didn't seem to hear him, though.
"'Oh, it's okay; we're happy for the two of you!'" Itachi scoffed. "Yeah, I don't fucking think so." His hand balled into a fist against Sasuke's side. "I mean, how could they ever be happy for me about this, about what I've been doing to you, about what I've—"
"Hey," Sasuke said again. Louder, firmer. Effectively cutting Itachi off this time. He moved his hand back so he could put it on top of Itachi's. "You aren't doing anything to me, Itachi. You love me. And I love you."
"I know, Sasuke," Itachi said quickly, bluntly, harshly. "I know, but…" He pulled his hand away from Sasuke and ran it through his hair. Sasuke could hear him pulling at his long locks.
"But what?"
Itachi was quiet. There was an energy around him that made Sasuke worried. Something he really hadn't felt before. A growing nervousness, a palpable fear, a thick anger. But it wasn't directed at Sasuke.
"But you know that's all they're going to see, right?" Itachi asked. His voice deathly quiet. Calm, almost, aside from the quaver in his words. "I'm older, so I should know better. I'm your brother, so I should know better. They're going to think I dragged you into this. That I'm hurting you, that I'm forcing you, that I'm defiling you, that I'm corrupting you! Because I'm sick; I'msickandIshouldhavefuckingknownbetterthantodothis! And—"
"Hey, hey, hey," Sasuke tried to interrupt.
But Itachi was talking too fast, breathing too fast, thinking too fast.
"—what if they're right, Sasuke? What if I am hurting you? Oh god, am I hurting you? Have I hurt you?—"
"No, Itachi, you haven't—"
"—Fuck, I'm sorry—I'm sorry, Sasuke! I don't want to hurt you, I never wanted to hurt you. I—"
"Itachi, it's okay," Sasuke said firmly as he turned around to face his brother. His heart clenched when he saw the tears streaming freely down Itachi's face and the way his brother's dark eyes were flicking back and forth frantically. Looking around at him, at the room, but clearly not seeing. He put his hand on Itachi's cheek gently. "You're okay."
"But—"
"You're okay," Sasuke repeated, shushing him softly. "I promise, you're okay. I'm right here with you and you're okay. So, just breathe. Breathe with me, okay?"
Itachi nodded hurriedly, distractedly—making Sasuke worry that Itachi wasn't really listening. Making him worry that he wouldn't be able to help his brother. But he was relieved when Itachi began to mimic him once Sasuke started to guide him through a few deep breaths.
He didn't exactly know what he was doing; Sasuke had never dealt with something like this before, but focusing on his breathing had helped him calm down after everything had happened with Naruto. And judging by the way Itachi's chest stopped heaving and his body slowly started to relax as they got to their sixth and then seventh breaths, Sasuke figured he was doing something right. So he kept going.
After a few more, Itachi finally focused on him completely and nodded, breaking rhythm with Sasuke as a way to let him know he could stop.
"Thank you," Itachi mumbled.
"Of course," Sasuke said. "Are you okay?"
Itachi worried at his lower lip. "As okay as I can be right now, I think," he answered.
"Good." Sasuke rubbed his thumb over Itachi's cheeks, wiping away his tears. "That's good."
A part of him was shaking, though. He'd never seen Itachi get like that. Not really. Sure, there had been the small moments here and there. Like in Suna when he talked about Kakashi, or after Naruto had hurt Sasuke. Moments where Itachi had seemed to lose control, to lose himself, but they had been just that. Moments.
This had been something else entirely and he had witnessed every second of it—the build-up, the breakdown, the aftermath. And while Sasuke didn't know if he was right, since he had no real experience with it, he was pretty sure his brother had just had a panic attack.
And knowing that, seeing that, left Sasuke feeling unsettled and more than a little nerve-wracked.
Which was something he guessed Itachi seemed to notice when his brother pulled away from him and muttered a small, quiet, "I'm sorry."
The apology, so gentle and unsure as it was, instantly made Sasuke snap back to himself. Because this wasn't about him. This was about his brother. Who needed him right now.
"No, no, no," he whispered quickly, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, Itachi. You didn't do anything, I promise."
"I never wanted you to see that, though," Itachi admitted, looking away from him. "I didn't want you to have to worry about that stuff—about me."
"Itachi…" Sasuke said quietly. He put his hand to Itachi's bare chest, feeling his heart thumping steadily under his touch. "You're my brother—my boyfriend. I love you; I worry about you. It comes with the territory, the same way you worry about me."
Itachi's nostrils flared, but he didn't say anything and Sasuke couldn't help but wonder if his brother believed him. But since Itachi didn't pull away from him again, Sasuke decided to take that as a good sign and shifted a little closer. He put his fingers under Itachi's chin so he could tilt his head up the way Itachi had done to him countless times before and was happy when Itachi looked at him.
"Let me ask you something," Sasuke said. It took a second, but Itachi nodded. "Do you regret this—us, I mean?"
"Of course not," Itachi said quickly. "I love you."
"And I love you," Sasuke replied. He ran his thumb along Itachi's jaw, watching the movement closely as he asked another question. "Do you ever regret loving me? Have you ever really wished you could've woken up one day with these feelings gone?"
Itachi pulled in a deep breath, and Sasuke worried for just a second that he might have offended him by even thinking to ask that. When Itachi let it out, though, he shook his head. "No. Never."
"Neither have I," he said, smiling softly. "So, please listen to me when I tell you that I love every part of you, okay?" He brushed a few stray hairs away from Itachi's face before he settled his hand back on Itachi's cheek. "I know it might be hard to accept because you spent so long hiding things. Trying to be strong, trying to be the perfect son, my perfect big brother. But, Itachi, I promise—you're perfect just by being you."
Itachi's eyes gleamed in the moonlight as he searched Sasuke's face. Looking for a lie, a joke, some sign that all the things that he'd thought about himself over the years were really true and that Sasuke was wrong.
But there wasn't one to find, and once Itachi seemed to realize that, he turned his gaze from Sasuke and rolled onto his back.
"I don't deserve you," he mumbled.
"Don't say that," Sasuke said softly, propping himself up on his elbow so he could look at Itachi.
"But it's true, Sasuke," Itachi said. Not as if he were trying to argue, but instead just stating what he thought was a fact. "I mean, I've failed you, our parents, myself. I'm a mess; I'm…" Itachi pressed his lips together and sighed. "I'm broken."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "No, you're—"
"But then, here you are," Itachi continued, gesturing toward Sasuke. "Telling me that I'm not, even after you saw me—after you saw that. And I can't help but think that I haven't done anything to deserve that."
"Now, hold on," Sasuke said, not believing he'd just heard those words come out of Itachi's mouth. "What do you mean you 'haven't done anything'?"
Itachi opened his mouth to answer, but Sasuke held up his hand.
"No, don't answer that," he demanded. "Just listen to me."
Before he continued, Sasuke pushed himself onto his knees and moved to straddle Itachi's hips, intent on making sure his brother stayed put and heard what he had to say as he leaned down, holding himself up with a hand on either side of Itachi's head.
"You have spent your whole life doing so much, Itachi," Sasuke said as he held Itachi's gaze. "Being a role model for me, pushing yourself to be what our parents wanted, helping and caring for anyone you meet. Now, do you struggle sometimes from the weight of those things? Yes. But that's okay. Because the struggles don't take away from who you are, which is someone who is smart."
Sasuke lowered himself so he could kiss Itachi's forehead.
"Kind."
He kissed his cheeks.
"Strong."
He laid a hand over Itachi's heart as he looked him over. Taking in every curve, dip, and angle of his features before he leaned closer.
"Beautiful."
He matched their lips together in a slow, sensual kiss as he sought to make Itachi understand the depths of his feelings. That he looked up to him, that he admired him, that he loved him more than he'd ever loved anything or anyone before.
Their eyes met when they parted and Itachi moved to put his hand on Sasuke's thigh as they panted softly against one another's lips. The touch itself was innocuous, innocent, but something shifted between them because of it—Sasuke could feel it in his gut, could see it on his brother's face in the faint light.
The air was charged, but they were both still. Quiet.
At least until Sasuke swallowed thickly and said, "I just want to take care of you, Itachi. So, will you let me do that?"
"Sasuke…"
Itachi's warm breath hit Sasuke's lips and he was afraid that his brother was going to say no. That Itachi was going to push him away and deny himself a moment to feel good, to feel loved, to heal even if it was just in a small way.
But then Itachi's lips were on his again and Itachi's hand moved to his waist, pulling him closer, causing the feeling to spread inside him. To his chest, his fingers, warming him as it grew and grew. Until he was cupping Itachi's face in his hand gently. Until he was sliding his tongue against Itachi's as their kiss deepened.
Until he knew exactly what the feeling was.
Want.
He wanted his brother, but not in the same ways he'd wanted Itachi before. No, this was different. Deeper. More meaningful.
Because he wanted to let Itachi know that he was here. That he was loved. That Sasuke would do anything in the world for him, even if he didn't ask for it.
No.
Especially because he wouldn't ask for it.
And this was the best way he could think to convey that. By worshiping every inch of Itachi. By making him feel good in ways only Sasuke could. By driving away the doubts, the anxieties, the self-loathing with something good, even if it was only for a little while.
But, of course, he needed Itachi's consent first. So he kissed along his brother's jaw to his ear, nibbling on the lobe briefly before he asked again, quietly, "Will you let me take care of you, Itachi?"
Itachi sighed softly against him. His fingers tightened just slightly on Sasuke's waist.
"It's okay to say no," Sasuke added quickly, making sure his brother knew he had the option. "I just—"
"You can," Itachi answered. Then he added, "I want you to."
A smile spread across Sasuke's lips and he took Itachi's earlobe back in his mouth, paying it more attention this time before he pressed a trail of kisses down Itachi's neck. Taking time to lick and nip gently at the warm, soft skin with each subsequent kiss until Itachi was groaning and tilting his head in order to give him more access. Silently asking for more and more by the way he kept trying to pull Sasuke closer, press more of their bodies together.
But Sasuke kept his touch and his kisses delicate. Content to spend the rest of the night pouring his love and affection into his brother as he skimmed his fingers up and over Itachi's arm and shoulder, across his collarbone, down his chest before tracing his way back while his lips danced teasingly across Itachi's throat. Pressing only the slightest bit harder whenever he passed over Itachi's Adam's apple just so he could hear the quiet intake of breath his brother made from the dangerous suggestion of asphyxiation that he knew the slight sensation brought.
He knew Itachi couldn't hold out, though. Not when he was faced with so many sensations, not when he was finally the one being loved and touched and appreciated so completely. Not when he was so hard underneath Sasuke, trying to rock up into him.
So Sasuke took mercy on his brother and pulled away from him. He smiled to himself when he saw the way Itachi's eyes were half-closed in pleasure and felt how insistent his hands were as he tried to pull Sasuke back down to him.
"Please, don't stop," Itachi begged, wanting and desperate.
"I'm not, baby; I promise," Sasuke said, feeling bold and enjoying the soft, pleased sigh that Itachi let out when he heard the endearment. "I just thought you'd like to get a little more comfortable."
Itachi looked down at where Sasuke sat on him and nodded as he realized what he meant. Sasuke rewarded him with a quick kiss before he moved off of him. Itachi took the opportunity to take his boxers off and spread his legs for Sasuke without even a thought.
And the ease of the movement, how trusting and submissive his brother was in this moment made Sasuke's breath catch and he gave himself a beat to take in just how beautiful Itachi was once he settled between his legs.
His lips were parted, his chest was rising and falling noticeably quicker, the head of his cock was glistening with precome. Leaving it easy to imagine the flush that would be painted across Itachi's skin if they were to turn on the lights. Which he considered, briefly, because he liked to see his brother when they made love, but the thought flew from his mind when Itachi worried at his lower lip and slid his right hand across his stomach and down, down, down—until he was brushing the base of his cock.
"Oh, no, no, no," Sasuke said quickly. He reached down, took hold of Itachi's hand and brought it up, pinning it above his head as Sasuke leaned back over him. "That's my job. I'm supposed to be taking care of you."
"Then take care of me," Itachi challenged quietly. He rolled his hips up and groaned when his cock brushed against Sasuke's stomach. "Because I need you, Sasuke."
A jolt shot through him from the way Itachi sounded — desperate, wanton, hungry — and it took everything in him not to strip off his sweatpants and take Itachi right there. But he took a breath, then another as he watched Itachi closely and reminded himself that this was about Itachi—about his brother's pleasure. Not his own. Not right now.
So he settled for pressing their lips together in a crushing kiss as he held Itachi down beneath him. His brother moaned and took Sasuke's free hand in his own so he could feel Sasuke's touch on his body and guide him down toward his cock. And Sasuke decided to give him the satisfaction, at least for a moment, and took Itachi in hand. Finding it ridiculously hot when Itachi didn't stop guiding his movements, so they stroked him together slowly, making Itachi gasp and tilt his head back, breaking their kiss.
"Sasuke," he moaned. "Sasuke, that feels so good."
"Yeah?" Sasuke asked. "Is this all you want then? Just my hand on your cock?"
He put his lips back to Itachi's neck, felt his brother's pulse pounding under his tongue and sucked a mark into his skin. Itachi writhed beneath him and moved their hands over his shaft quicker even as he panted out a quiet, "No."
Sasuke smirked and took back control then, pulling their hands away from Itachi's cock so he could take Itachi's hand in his own instead and pin it above his head like he had with the other. Shifting his weight into his hands to keep his brother in place even though Itachi wasn't fighting him.
"Then what do you want?" he asked, feeling his blood rushing in his veins. "Just tell me and I promise I'll give it to you."
Itachi didn't hesitate to answer, "I want your fingers inside me."
A soft groan sounded from deep in Sasuke's throat as he considered the request and then nodded. "I can do that," he said. "But — he gave Itachi a look — can you promise me you'll keep your hands off yourself?"
"Yes," Itachi said breathlessly. "I promise, Sasuke. I promise."
"Good." Sasuke kissed Itachi before he let him go so he could reach over to pull open the drawer on Itachi's nightstand and grab out the lube from inside.
Itachi watched every move he made, licking his lips as he waited, and once Sasuke pushed himself up onto his knees and popped the cap on the bottle, Itachi opened his legs wider. His cock bobbed gently with the movement and Sasuke couldn't help but openly appreciate the sight as he coated his fingers.
"You're so beautiful, Itachi," he muttered, almost to himself as he moved his fingers to Itachi's entrance. He rubbed gently at the puckered hole, feeling it give easily underneath his finger as his brother relaxed, but he did little more then toy with Itachi. Constantly seeming like he was going to work his finger inside just to pull it back before the tip was completely inserted.
The teasing was driving Itachi insane, leaving him groaning and shifting his hips impatiently. But when Sasuke saw that he was obediently keeping his hands up by his head, he decided his brother deserved his reward and pushed his index finger inside Itachi slowly.
The awaited intrusion made Itachi moan as his eyes closed. The word, "Yes," tumbled quietly from his lips when Sasuke started thrusting his finger in and out.
"I love you, Itachi," Sasuke said as he worked a second finger inside with the first, stretching Itachi's hole and drawing a low mewl from his brother as Itachi gripped the pillow beneath him to keep his hands still while Sasuke opened him. Pulling his fingers out and then pushing them back in slowly but not completely as he prodded just inside Itachi's entrance, searching. "I love you so much, you know that, right?"
"Yes, Sasuke, yes," Itachi panted. "And I love—haah, fuck."
Itachi's words were cut off by a broken gasp when Sasuke found his prostate and started rubbing at it gently through his walls. The rush of pleasure made Itachi's back arch and his legs tremble just slightly as he rocked to meet Sasuke's fingers and apply more pressure.
Sasuke licked his lips at the sight as his own cock throbbed between his legs, but he still refused to touch himself. More determined to bring Itachi off first than to seek out his own pleasure, especially when he had Itachi under him like this. So vulnerable, so obedient, so—
"More, Sasuke," Itachi gasped. "Please!"
So greedy.
"More, what, Itachi?" he asked, deciding to play his brother's game as he moved to kiss him while he started thrusting his fingers inside him again. "More pressure? Another finger?"
"Yes," Itachi panted against his lips, nodding his head hurriedly. "Yes, please, just—!"
Itachi's mouth fell open as he grunted in pleasure when Sasuke began to work his third finger inside. His brother was tight around him, but after a few slow thrusts, he loosened enough that Sasuke could stuff all three fingers inside him completely. Leaving Itachi looking like a mess in the moonlight as he finally broke and moved his hands, but only to reach out and grab Sasuke so he could hold him close as he rode his fingers. Panting, "Fuck! Yes, yes, yes," in the small space between them.
"There you go," Sasuke muttered as he watched. Pleasure addling his own gaze as he rocked his hips in time with his fingers to get some kind of fleeting friction against his aching cock when Itachi moved just right. "Just let me make you feel good."
"Feels good. Feels—fuck!" Itachi's nails dug into his back when Sasuke started rubbing against his prostate again. His hips moved a little quicker, more erratically as he warned, "Fuck, I'm gonna come, Sasuke," and then begged, "Don't stop, don't stop, don't—haah!" before his back arched and he came, untouched, between them.
And Sasuke didn't stop. He kept alternating between massaging Itachi's prostate and thrusting his fingers inside him as his brother rode the wave of his orgasm, clutching at Sasuke, making his pleasure well known. He only stopped once Itachi did, slipping his fingers out of his brother when Itachi's hips stopped rocking against him.
Itachi took a moment to catch his breath after that before he kissed Sasuke. Sasuke kissed him back again and again, mumbling affectionate words against his lips between each kiss until Itachi shifted underneath him and broke away, giving Sasuke a look.
"You're still hard," he stated.
"I know," Sasuke replied as if he hadn't already been intimately and painfully aware of that. Then he shrugged. "It's okay."
"No," Itachi said. He started to reach down so he could get Sasuke off, but Sasuke just grabbed his hand. The move made Itachi give him a hurt look. "But—"
Sasuke quieted him with another kiss. "But this was about me taking care of you, Itachi. Not the other way around."
Itachi pressed his lips together as he considered that, clearly unhappy. However, instead of arguing, he asked, "Then if you won't let me do it, why don't you take care of yourself, too?"
And since Sasuke didn't really need convincing, he nodded at Itachi's suggestion and began to move so he could get up. "Okay, I'll just go to the bathroom—"
"No," Itachi said. He grabbed Sasuke to hold him still. "Stay here with me." He kissed Sasuke slowly, adding when they broke apart, "I want to watch you."
Sasuke's eyes closed and he moaned, but he didn't have the will to fight it anymore. So he reached into his sweatpants and pulled his cock out. His fingers were still covered in lube which slicked his shaft as he started jerking himself off as he held himself up over his brother.
Itachi's hands roamed over his body, running down his back and over his ass as he watched Sasuke's hand work over his cock. And as Sasuke's hand moved faster, as his release quickly grew closer, Itachi pushed himself up a little. Enough so that he could whisper in Sasuke's ear, "You fingers felt so good inside me, Sasuke. I don't know if I've ever come that hard."
"Fuck, Itachi," Sasuke moaned as a hot wave of pleasure pulsed through him and made his cock throb in his hand.
"And you liked it, didn't you?" Itachi continued. "Taking me like that, making me submit to you, holding me down?"
"Yes, fuck yes."
"Then why don't you do it now?" Itachi challenged. "Hold me down and come on me, show me that I'm yours."
Sasuke didn't need to hear anything else. He grunted and moved so he could do exactly as his brother suggested and held Itachi down against the bed by his shoulder while he kept jerking himself off over him. Thinking about how good it had felt, like the times before, to see Itachi fall apart because of him, to watch his brother be reduced to a moaning, begging mess while Sasuke's fingers were stuffed in his ass, to feel Itachi come on his fingers while knowing next time he'd make his brother come on his cock again. Crying his name and begging for more and—
"Fuck, Itachi, Itachi!" Sasuke gasped out suddenly as his orgasm hit him and he came. He looked down as pleasure flooded through him and watched, intensely satisfied, as his come shot onto his brother's stomach while he pumped his cock, milking himself through his orgasm and marking Itachi as his.
Wholly and completely his.
And the thought of that kept him warm and satisfied even after his orgasm subsided and he moved off of Itachi. He collapsed on his back beside his brother and grabbed Itachi's hand, bringing it to his lips so he could press kisses along each of his fingers.
"I love you," he said. "I know I say it a lot, but I hope you know how much I mean it every time."
Itachi squeezed his hand. "I love you, too, Sasuke."
They laid in silence together for a little while, just listening to one another breath and exist until Itachi finally shifted, turned his lamp back on, and got out of bed so he could go clean himself up. Sasuke followed, even though his body was screaming at him to just stay in bed, and he gave himself a quick once over before he headed back to wait for Itachi. His brother returned a couple of minutes later and crawled back into bed, giving Sasuke a curious look when he saw him laying on his back with his arms open expectantly.
"I'm gonna hold you," Sasuke said in way of explanation.
"Wow, this is some special treatment," Itachi said, sounding sarcastically impressed. But Sasuke caught the way his lips turned up just a little as he turned out the light again.
"Well, you're my special guy," Sasuke shot back through a yawn. He waved Itachi over. "So, c'mere."
Itachi did. He laid next to Sasuke on his side, pulled the covers up, and put his head on Sasuke's chest. Sighing happily and snuggling closer when Sasuke's arms wrapped around him to hold him close. And as they laid there, Sasuke realized that he should make a point to hold Itachi like this more often. Because his brother was warm, his weight was comforting, and Sasuke liked the way it felt to be relied on for something so important as the safety of his brother's sleep.
He smiled to himself at the thought and kissed Itachi's head, muttering a soft, tired, "I love you, baby," against his hair as he closed his eyes.
Itachi let out a quiet huff as he smiled against Sasuke's bare chest. The noise made Sasuke crack an eye open.
"What is it?"
"Oh, nothing," Itachi muttered. His fingertips ran back and forth over Sasuke's stomach. "I just like to hear you call me that. No one ever has before."
"No? The other guys didn't…?"
Itachi shook his head slightly. "No. So, it's nice to hear it." Itachi pressed a light kiss to his chest. "Especially from you. It makes me feel loved. Special."
A pleasant feeling welled deep in Sasuke's chest. A rightness, a happiness that he'd been able to make Itachi feel like that. Especially since it was always how Itachi made him feel.
"Well, you are special, babe," Sasuke said. He gave Itachi a little squeeze. "You're so special to me."
Itachi snaked his arm around Sasuke's middle and squeezed him back. "You're special to me, too," he replied.
They fell silent after that, Itachi holding him tight and Sasuke stroking his fingers along his brother's skin as he closed his eyes again. Within a couple of minutes, he finally began succumbing to sleep, could feel the sensations of his body slowly drifting away from his consciousness.
Before he was gone completely though, he heard Itachi whisper, as if he were sure Sasuke was already asleep, "Thank you for being here. For loving me. It means…so much more to me than you'll ever know."
But Sasuke was pretty sure he had some idea, and he fell asleep a few seconds later with a smile on his lips.
XxX
It was late morning when they woke. Sasuke blinked against the brightness spilling into the bedroom and groaned as he covered his eyes with his arm, trying to block out the light. Itachi shifted against him at the movement, looking up at him and chuckling when he saw the obvious discomfort on Sasuke's face.
"Good morning," Itachi greeted softly, tucking his hand between his cheek and Sasuke's chest.
Sasuke grumbled in reply, "It's too bright and it's morning. So, what's good about it?"
"Mm, well you're here with me," Itachi noted idly.
Sasuke's tired brain considered that. "Yeah," he conceded. "I guess that is good." He rubbed his hand over Itachi's back. "Okay. Good morning."
Itachi chuckled again and put one of his legs over Sasuke's as they lapsed into a sleepy kind of quiet for a little while longer. Itachi just content to be held while Sasuke woke up and Sasuke not rushing to do so because… Well, because he didn't want to, but also because he knew neither of them were ready to face what the day held for them yet.
When they did get up a little while later, though, it was only because Sasuke's stomach started growling—loudly. Making Itachi laugh while Sasuke tried to insist that he was fine and that they should just keep cuddling. Itachi wasn't buying it though, and he slipped out of Sasuke's grasp (to much complaining from Sasuke) so he could go to the bathroom to wash up before he headed to the kitchen.
It took Sasuke another ten minutes before he finally dragged himself out of bed, albeit still reluctantly. And only — only — because he smelled food and missed his brother (though not necessarily in that order). So, he headed to the kitchen after swiping his phone out from under his pillow and going to brush his teeth, finding Itachi standing at the stove, cooking, when he came down the hall.
Itachi turned to look at Sasuke when he heard him, smiling at the still-sleepy look Sasuke knew was plastered on his face as he stalked over, latching onto his brother's side without a word. Itachi put his arm around Sasuke and kissed the top of his head.
"I'm just making eggs and toast," Itachi said while he moved the scrambled eggs around in the pan with the spatula in his other hand. "I hope that's okay."
"Sounds great," Sasuke said. "Thank you."
"Of course. Now, go sit down. It's almost done."
Sasuke did, extracting himself from Itachi so he could head to the dining table. Itachi followed just a couple minutes later, setting Sasuke's plate down in front of him before Itachi took the seat across the table.
They ate mostly in silence aside from a few comments from Sasuke about how good Itachi's cooking was, to which Itachi noted only, "They're just eggs."
"Yeah, but you made them," Sasuke retorted, making Itachi shake his head.
When they were finished, Sasuke, feeling more awake, got up, taking their dishes as he stood so he could go load them into the dishwasher. He was unsurprised to find Itachi still sitting at the table when he was done, staring down at his hands as he fiddled with them on the tabletop. He knee was bouncing wildly because the end of their meal could only mean one thing.
Their time was up.
Sasuke walked back over. "It'll be okay, Itachi," he said, putting his hand on his brother's back comfortingly.
"I know," Itachi said, nodding. "I know, it's just…"
"Yeah, I know," Sasuke whispered. "But, hey."
He pulled the chair he'd vacated over so he could sit closer to Itachi, settling a hand over Itachi's nervous ones to try and draw his brother's attention over his way. He was glad when it worked and Itachi looked at him.
"We don't have to do this," he reminded Itachi. Because he needed to, both for Itachi's sanity and his own. He needed them both to know they still had a choice. That nothing had been done yet. "I haven't told them we're coming over or anything, so if you don't want to, then—"
"No," Itachi muttered. His eyes searched Sasuke's face before turning down to stare blankly at his bare chest. "No, we should do it. We need to do it."
His words were more confident than his tone, but Sasuke knew Itachi meant what he said all the same. But because he knew his brother would do the same for him, he asked:
"Are you sure?"
Itachi seemed to think about it. Or maybe it just took a few seconds for Sasuke's question to register through his worry. Itachi looked back up at him all the same, though, and nodded.
"Yeah," he said. "I'm sure.
Sasuke frowned at the despondent, resigned expression on Itachi's face. He scooted forward a little on his chair until their knees bumped together gently then cupped his brother's face in his hands.
"I'll be with you," he said, leaning forward to kiss Itachi. When he pulled away, Sasuke offered his brother a smile. "No matter what, I'll be right there by your side."
Itachi nodded, worrying at his lower lip. "I know," he said. But he didn't look any better as he pulled away from Sasuke so he could stand up. "I'm going to go take a shower now. Then we can…" He cleared his throat and gestured vaguely with his hand.
Go.
"Okay," Sasuke said. He used his feet to push himself and the chair he sat in back away from Itachi so his brother had room to move. He looked up at Itachi as he added, "Have a nice shower."
Itachi walked away without another word. Sasuke watched him go, but once he heard the bathroom door close with a quiet click after Itachi grabbed clean clothes from the bedroom, he folded his arms on top of the table and laid his head down on top of them as he sighed.
Itachi was still scared, that much was obvious, but Sasuke couldn't blame him. After all, he was just trying to put a brave face on for his brother, but underneath the facade, Sasuke was scared, too. How could he not be when in just a little while he was going to be telling their parents to their faces that he and Itachi were together? That they were going to continue to be together. That they were going to move away—together.
It was crazy to think about doing it, telling them, coming clean. Insane, really. But even as Sasuke sat there, staring down at the table and listening to the shower running down the hall, he still couldn't help but think it was the best choice.
A stupid choice, sure.
One he honestly wished he didn't have to make.
But it was still the best.
And that's all he could keep telling himself as he mustered the courage to pull his phone out of his pocket so he could bring up his mother's conversation thread. Staring at the last messages that they'd sent to one another for a minute. Then two. Until he finally took the plunge.
"Hey mom. Just wanted to let you know I'll be home soon."
He sighed as he watched the message be marked as sent, immediately aware of the regret that settled deep in his stomach even though he hadn't told her anything yet. He'd just given her the expectation that he was coming home and that was enough to make him sick. Because he knew the deeper meaning behind it all; he knew what he was about to do.
But it's the best choice we've got right now, he reminded himself.
So, he sat and waited for Itachi. Not daring to move until he heard him leave the bathroom twenty minutes later. But then Sasuke rose from the table and went to change. Counting every step, every breath, every second as if it were going to be his last.
XxX
They got to their parents' house far quicker than Sasuke had expected—or wanted. He figured it was because there had been no discussions, no questions, no kisses. Itachi had just been waiting for him by the front door after Sasuke finished changing. His shoes already on, keys in hand.
Sasuke had considered saying something then, had tried to find some half-encouraging words to put them both at ease. But nothing he could think of to say sounded right. So he'd just ended up putting his shoes on instead before following Itachi to the car.
And ten minutes later, here they were.
Well—
"I'm home."
Here he was, actually—walking through their parents' front door alone because they'd decided it would be best for Itachi to wait outside until Sasuke at least introduced the idea of even meeting his boyfriend.
"Fantastic, you're just in time!" Mikoto said cheerfully, coming out of the kitchen just as Sasuke closed the door and took off his shoes. Flour dusted up when she saw him and clapped her hands together. "I was just getting ready to—" She paused, giving him an odd look as she took in the sight of him. "Sweetie, are you okay?"
Sasuke wanted to say yes. He wanted to laugh, tell her of course I am before proceeding to help her with whatever she needed. Forgetting everything else that he'd come to do.
But his brother was outside. Waiting.
And Sasuke had already lied to his mother enough lately.
So, he answered her honestly.
"No."
Immediately, Mikoto frowned and came closer. She dusted her hands off on her apron so she wouldn't get flour on him when she put her hands on his shoulders.
"What's wrong, honey? What's happened?" she asked, looking him over. Searching for a wound or a bruise or whatever it was that had hurt her little boy.
"Nothing, mom; I'm fine," Sasuke said quickly. But his voice broke as he said it, completely ruining any potential there might have been for her to believe that. So he decided to just barrel forward. "It's just, uh, I wanted you and dad to…meet my, uh…" He cleared his throat. "To meet my boyfriend."
Mikoto's eyes lit up. "Your boyfriend?" she repeated like she didn't believe it. "You want us to meet him?"
"Yeah." Sasuke shifted awkwardly on his feet. "If you want to, I mean."
He added the last part quickly, part of him naively hopeful that she would say no. Then disappointed when she didn't.
"Of course we want to, sweetie!" she exclaimed. "Your father had to go to the station for a while, but he'll be back in an hour or so. When did you want to invite your boyfriend over? Do you think he'll want to stay for dinner?"
"Oh," he mumbled. More relieved than upset that their father wouldn't be here for this. "Well, he's already here, actually…"
Mikoto's eyebrows raised in surprise. "He is?" She looked behind him like there was even the slightest possibility that he could have been hiding behind Sasuke. "Well, where is he?"
"Outside," Sasuke answered quietly.
"Outside!" she repeated incredulously. She shook her head at him and pushed at his shoulders. "Well, go let him in, sweetie! It's getting cold out—you don't want him to catch a cold!"
Sasuke nodded but he didn't move. He just stood, frozen, staring at his mother. Trying to remember this moment; her excitement, her smile. He wanted to be able to hold onto it. To have a good memory from today once it was all over.
"What is it, Sasuke?" she questioned when he still hadn't moved.
"Nothing," he muttered, shaking his head quickly. He took a step backward toward the door, adding quietly, "Just, please don't—"
Be mad.
"Oh, I promise I won't embarrass you, silly," she said, laughing. "Now — she waved at him to move — go let the poor boy in already."
"Okay," he said.
She started straightening her dress and fussing with her apron as Sasuke turned to go back to the door. When he opened it, Sasuke was relieved to find Itachi waiting just a few steps away. His hands in his pockets as he stared out toward the road, looking as collected as ever. If Sasuke hadn't known better, he would have wondered if his brother was nervous at all.
"It's just mom here, but you can come in now," Sasuke told him, drawing Itachi's attention to him.
Itachi nodded and walked over, but before Sasuke could open the door the rest of the way to let him in, Itachi reached out, stopping him.
"Whatever is about to happen," Itachi whispered. "Just remember: I'm here with you."
Sasuke's lips quirked upward briefly. "I feel like I should be the one telling you that," he whispered back.
"I already know it," Itachi replied, but he gave Sasuke an appreciative look before letting go of his hand so they could go inside.
Once the door was shut again, Itachi stepped forward, placing himself in between Sasuke and their mother.
"Hi, mom," Itachi said quietly.
"Hi, sweetie," she replied easily. Clearly happy to see him even as she looked around Itachi to give Sasuke a curious glance. "You invited your brother over to meet him, too?"
"Not exactly," Sasuke mumbled. He stepped forward, stopping beside Itachi. Though, out of habit, he left a foot of space between them.
Mikoto cocked an eyebrow. "Have you already met his boyfriend then?" she asked Itachi.
"No, I…" Itachi began, but he trailed off.
The silence, the anticipation caused Sasuke to look over and his heart clenched when he saw Itachi open and close his mouth a few times. Clearly looking for the right words to say, to explain, but he couldn't find them. And Sasuke could see how quickly that was breaking down whatever facade of calm his brother had managed to build up.
Could see how Itachi's hands clenched at his sides, how his breathing quickened just the slightest bit, how he shifted backward subtly like he was desperate to leave.
"I…"
And how, finally, he lowered his gaze to the floor. Guilty, ashamed.
"I am…"
"He is my boyfriend," Sasuke broke in. Loud. Confident. Drawing Itachi's gaze back up as Sasuke stepped in front of him like a shield. Determined to protect his brother like he'd promised he would. "Itachi is my boyfriend, mom."
Mikoto's face fell. Her chest rose with a shuddering breath. When it, too, fell, she breathed out a humorless laugh.
"That isn't funny, Sasuke," she said.
"It's not a joke, mom," he replied, shaking his head. "Itachi and I have been…seeing each other for a little while now."
Their mother's nostrils flared. Her lips pursed into a tight line. She looked from Sasuke to Itachi, her gaze expectant as she silently asked him whether it was true or not.
Itachi just nodded.
Then, before Sasuke could really understand what was happening, their mother stepped forward. She grabbed Sasuke by the wrist, pulling him quickly behind her as she raised her hand and slapped Itachi across the face in a swift, harsh movement that echoed in the room.
"Mom!" Sasuke gasped.
He tried to move forward. Tried to go to Itachi as his brother lifted his hand to his cheek in shock, but Mikoto's grip was like iron. Keeping him still by her side as she thrust a finger in Itachi's face.
"What did you do to him?" she demanded. Her voice was low, dangerous. Her hand shaking.
"Nothing," Itachi answered, sounding shaken. Like he was ready to break. "I didn't do anything to—"
SMACK!
"That's a lie!" she shouted as she drew her hand back after hitting him again.
"No, it's not, mom!" Sasuke cried out, trying to pull out of her grasp again. "He didn't—"
"Be quiet, Sasuke," she snapped, glancing back at him, her eyes wild. When she looked back at Itachi her voice was shaking with rage. "Did you hurt him, Itachi? Did you—oh god—did you force yourself on him?"
"No!" Sasuke and Itachi shouted together, equally appalled.
But it was Sasuke who continued, "Itachi would never hurt me, mom! He loves me, and I love him."
That gave Mikoto pause. "Love?" she whispered.
She turned to look at Sasuke, eyeing him like he'd grown a second head, but her grip finally loosened. Giving him the opportunity he needed to slip free from her so he could go to Itachi.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly when he was at Itachi's side.
His brother nodded, pulling his hand away from his cheek when Sasuke touched it, wanting to check on him. Sasuke winced involuntarily when he saw the bright red handprint on Itachi's cheek.
"I'm sorry," he murmured, ghosting his fingers over the mark. "I'm so sorry."
Itachi didn't move to say anything, but it would have mattered anyway because their mother spoke up from behind them.
"Love?" she repeated louder. Disgust creeping into her tone as she watched the two of them. "He's your brother, Sasuke."
Sasuke turned to glance at her. "I know that."
"Then you know how wrong it is. So why are you doing this?" She gestured between them. "Why are you saying these things?"
"Because I love him, mom," Sasuke said firmly, turning around to face her. "It's wrong, but I can't help it. I love him and I'm going to be with him."
"'Going to be with him,'" Mikoto muttered. "Sasuke, listen to yourself. What are you talking about? Do you know what people will think? How they'll react?"
"Yes," Sasuke answered. "And that's why we're leaving."
"Leaving?" Mikoto shook her head, genuinely surprised by that. "What do you mean you're leaving?"
"I mean, we're leaving the village. We're moving away. Together. Somewhere that no one will know us—where we can be who we are."
"Sasuke, honey, please listen to what you're saying," Mikoto said, her voice softening as her shoulders slumped down. Trying to appear as if she wasn't still angry. But Sasuke knew better—he'd seen it from her before. "Who you are is his brother—nothing else. Nothing more."
"And I understand that you think that," Sasuke said. "I know you'll never understand this, and I'm not asking you to."
"Then why are you telling me?" She shot back, the anger flaring up, adding a bite to her question.
"Because someone found out," Sasuke answered, sad and resigned as he thought about what had led them here. "They found out and they're planning to tell you, to tell everyone. So, I thought it would be better if we did it instead."
"We," Itachi spoke up suddenly, moving to stand next to Sasuke. Sasuke glanced over at him. "We thought it would better to tell you instead. We thought it might be…easier to hear it from us."
"Well, you thought wrong," Mikoto spat.
Sasuke nodded, understanding the situation they'd put her in. "I'm sorry, mom. Honestly, I am. I never really wanted you to find out this way. I never wanted you to find out at all."
"If you were really sorry then you'd tell your brother to leave right now," she said, ordering almost. "You'd tell him to stay away from you."
Sasuke looked over at Itachi, pressing his lips together when he caught his brother gaze and shook his head.
"No," he said, turning back to her. "I'm not going to do that, mom."
Mikoto stared at him, looking him over like she was trying to figure him out. But Sasuke didn't budge, didn't waver, didn't look away from her. Eventually, she took a deep breath.
"Then go pack your things," she said softly. Something close to defeat in her voice. "I want you out of this house before your father gets home."
Sasuke nodded. He didn't try to argue, didn't think to beg or ask for forgiveness. He just reached out to take his brother's hand.
"C'mon, Itachi," he said.
"No." Mikoto shook her head firmly. "Your brother will go wait outside. He's no longer welcome in this house."
Sasuke looked at her as if she were being unreasonable. "Mom—"
"It's okay, Sasuke," Itachi interrupted. "I'll go wait in the car."
Sasuke shot him an apologetic glance and squeezed Itachi's hand. "I'll be quick; I promise."
Itachi gave him a half-nod before he let Sasuke go and headed to the door. Both Sasuke and Mikoto watched him go, Sasuke unwilling to move until Itachi shut the door behind himself out of worry that their mother might try and go after him. But once Itachi was gone, Sasuke quickly went to his room to pack.
He grabbed whatever bags he could — a duffle, an old backpack, and a tote bag he'd gotten from somewhere years ago — and stuffed as many of his clothes as he could inside them. Mikoto watched him from his doorway, her arms crossed over her chest. Silent as she tracked every movement he made.
When he was finished a couple minutes later, he moved toward the door, stopping a few feet away when she didn't move to let him out.
"Mom," he said quietly.
A question, a warning, a worry.
She kept watching him, silent. Her eyes flicked back and forth quickly over his features. Searching for something—a doubt, a hesitation, a hint of questioning. And while he knew she wouldn't find any of those things, he couldn't help but wonder what she emdid/em see.
"You don't have to do this, Sasuke," she finally said.
Sasuke smiled sadly, but he shook his head. "No, mom, I think I do. Because I'm not going to change my mind. I'm not going to leave him."
Not again, he added to himself.
No, never again.
She blew out a breath through her nose. Frustrated with his response. "But he's your brother, Sasuke," she said quietly. Like hearing it this time would finally implore him to see reason.
Instead, Sasuke just sighed.
"Yes, I know that," he said. "Now, I need to go, mom. Itachi's waiting for me."
He moved forward, ready to push past her if she continued to refuse to move. But she held her hands out.
"No, wait," she said. "Please just—" She dropped her hands back to her sides and took a step toward him. "He's not here, so you can answer me honestly. Has he…" She pressed her lips together, giving him a pained look. "Has your brother hurt you, Sasuke?"
She whispered the words, making them sound dirty, obscene—leaving absolutely no room for misinterpretation of what she meant.
"No, mom," he answered, half-exasperated. "I told you, Itachi would never hurt me. You know him."
Mikoto frowned. "No, I don't know him," she replied. She shook her head. "I don't know either of you."
Hearing that was finally what wounded Sasuke, cutting into him in such a way that he knew he would wake up thinking about it months or maybe years down the line. In the middle of the night, in the shower, cooking dinner. But he'd chosen this, and that choice had been coupled with an acceptance of this. Their parents' hatred and disdain.
He just hadn't expected it to hurt this much.
"I'm sorry you feel that way," he muttered.
Mikoto didn't say anything in reply. Sasuke didn't expect her to. What more was there to say, after all? She could beg, could threaten, could try to convince him all day that he was wrong. But Sasuke's conviction wouldn't waver.
So he took this moment for what it was — an ending, a beginning — and moved to leave, his bags still in hand.
This time, Mikoto didn't try to stop him, she just stepped out of his way. Watching quietly as he walked out of his bedroom for the last time. He looked back when he was on the other side of the threshold, scanning the room to make sure he hadn't left anything behind that he couldn't just get again eventually.
His eyes settled on his mother last. She wasn't looking at him but at the floor. He knew she was aware of his gaze, though.
"I hope you and dad have a good life," he said softly. "I'll miss you guys. We both will."
Mikoto's face was unreadable when Sasuke turned to leave after that. She didn't follow after him as he made his way to the door. She didn't cry out from his room at the last second for him to stop
She just let him go.
And Sasuke realized that was the best possible outcome he could have hoped for. Because it was over now. Because they were free.
He grabbed the door handle after he put his shoes back on and took a last look around him. Taking a moment to remember the good times he'd had here before he walked through the door and out of the house where he'd spent his entire life so far. Leaving with only a silent goodbye as he stepped out into the bright autumn afternoon to see his brother, leaning against the hood of his car, staring at the ground. Waiting for him.
He glanced up when Sasuke shut the door and Sasuke rushed over to him, dropping his bags on the ground so he could wrap his brother in a hug.
"I'm so sorry," Sasuke murmured against Itachi's cheek as he cradled his head. Not sparing a single thought to who might see them or what they might think about the tender embrace. "I'm so, so sorry, Itachi."
"It's okay, Sasuke. I'm okay," Itachi said. But he tightened his hold on Sasuke's waist and buried his face in Sasuke's neck. "It would have happened sooner or later."
They stayed like that for a little while—just holding each other, feeling the beating of one another's heart, taking comfort in the fact that the other was simply there—until Itachi sighed. Sasuke pulled away from him and put his hand to Itachi's cheek, happy to see that the evidence of the blows their mother had struck were gone. Though he assumed they would both feel the sting of them for a while to come.
"Let's get out of here, yeah babe? Go back to your place?" Sasuke whispered, stroking his thumb over Itachi's cheek.
Itachi leaned into his touch. "Yeah."
Sasuke leaned closer, unable to stop himself even though he knew he shouldn't do it, or that he should, at the very least, look around to see if anyone could see him. But he didn't. He couldn't bring himself to care when his brother looked like this. Lost and guilty about what had happened.
So, Sasuke took a chance and closed the distance between them, pressing his lips to Itachi's in a quick kiss. Happily surprised when his brother kissed him back.
And it felt good. It felt right, just like every other time they'd kissed before, but there was a new sense of freedom now. A weight lifted off of them that made Sasuke sigh in relief and smile at his brother when they parted.
"I love you," Sasuke said, loud enough that someone could have easily overheard.
Itachi managed a smile, the first one Sasuke had seen from him since breakfast. "I love you, too," he replied.
And, suddenly, Sasuke knew that, somehow, everything would be okay.
They would be okay.
No matter what later, tomorrow, or the future, brought.