A/N: This chapter and the next reference a plot line from another fic (The Scars That Made Me) in which Lin comes down with an illness for several weeks and isn't expected to survive. For anyone that hasn't read that fic (or can't remember what happened), the conclusion of that plot is that she has a sort of coma-vision of Zaofu being destroyed when the comet returns, which leads the city's government to take preventative measures after she wakes up and tells Suyin.

Kiriko never knocked went she visited Raniq's home in Zoafu. This time, she could hear the crying before she even opened the door.

"What– What are you doing here?" Raniq asked in a most uncharacteristic fashion, looking positively frazzled. Her hair was a greasy mess, clothes rumpled like they'd been slept in. Her nose was red and crusty, and there were deep purple bags under her eyes. She was currently pacing around the living room with a very upset Saph in her arms.

"Nice to see you, too. Bolin called and said you'd be eternally grateful if I came over."

"Ugh… Of course he did."

"What's going on?"

"Saph has a cold." That statement was instantly punctuated by a rattly cough from her charge, and then again from Raniq herself. "And now I have it, too. Mara and Jojin had it and are already mostly over it, but they were at the end of their rope so I sent them over to Su's to get some actual rest."

"Why hasn't anyone come over here to help?"

"Because I told them not to! I don't want anyone else to get sick. And yes, I've taken her to the medical center. They said it's just a cold and she'll get over it."

"Well, I didn't spend three hours on a train for you to send me away."

"What about practice and rehearsals?" Raniq asked with a fretful scowl.

Kiriko just shrugged. "I've got the dream team back. Anisa, Niwen, and Shein can manage without me for a few days. And I can catch up with rehearsals easy. They know that."

It was hard to have a conversation over Saph's crying so she plucked her from Raniq's arms—though not without a disgusted grimace at the amount of snot.

"Ugh, get me a towel or something," she muttered, holding Saph under the armpits and away from her body. It didn't have the usual calming effect.

Fortunately, Raniq was quick to get something for the mess. "I guess I should thank you for coming. Sorry if I seem grouchy. I haven't slept in two days. And of course she stops crying now. Go figure."

"She can probably tell that you're about to lose it. Go take a shower. Drink some tea. Have a nap. I can handle her four a couple of hours."

"...Okay. Thank you. Really. Just…come get me if you need anything. Oh, see if you can get her to eat the jar of baby food in the fridge. She'll want a bottle, but I'd rather she eat that first, if possible. Don't forget to heat it up first. She hates it cold–"

"Go!"

Raniq finally left the room and Kiriko sat on the couch with Saph on her legs. Fresh snot had dripped out by that point.

"You're just a mess, aren't you?" Koko said as she wiped it away. "What do you want to do, huh? Play with a toy? Read a book? Drip more snot all over me?"

Saph only whined a little and rubbed her eyes.

"Or a nap. That works, too. Easy for me." She dried Saph's hands, which had gotten covered in a combination of tears and mucus. "So have they told you your birthday is next month? I know you don't know what that is, but it's pretty cool. I can't believe it's been almost a year. You were so tiny. Now you're all chubby and strong."

Kiriko enjoyed chatting with her like a normal person. It was their thing. Saph would usually stare back with wide eyes and then babble some nonsense.

"Raniq told me you're saying 'Mama' and 'Dada' and 'Nani' now, so it's time for you to learn my name, too. I know I'm not here as much, but I think you should try, okay? C'mon, you can do it. Kir-i-ko."

Fifteen minutes of patient determination and repetition were finally rewarded with something almost intelligible.

"Gi-go."

"Close enough! For now, anyway. We'll work on it. Better than Koko," she added under her breath.

"Go-go?"

"No-no!"

Saph laughed hysterically, though it quickly turned into coughing. "No no no no!"

"Mhmm, you're gonna be trouble."

The brief good mood didn't last, unfortunately. The tears and whining returned. None of Saph's toys or books seemed to distract her from her apparent misery. She didn't even seem interested in crawling around. Finally, Kiriko put her in the high chair and heated up the jar of baby food.

"Alright, kid. You're gonna eat this whether you want to or not. Got it?"

"No!"

"Yes." She put the spoon up to Saph's mouth, which remained stubbornly close. "C'mon, it's sweet potato. Your favorite."

"No!"

The whines quickly turned into outright crying. In a desperate attempt to quiet her so that Raniq wouldn't be woken up, Kiriko impulsively leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together.

Maybe it was simply surprise at something new, but the crying cut off instantly. Kiriko drew in a shaky breath. This had been Korra's special thing that she did with those closest to her. A tradition in her family, she'd said. Old Water Tribe customs. Two minds sharing the burden of turbulent emotions.

It seemed to be working. Saph was sniffling but otherwise calm, gazing back with those wide blue eyes.

"You good now? You gonna eat this for me?"

Kiriko tried again and was a little surprised when Saph actually opened her mouth, not to cry but to accept the spoon. After that, she seemed to remember that she did, in fact, like sweet potatoes. The rest of the jar was gone in ten minutes.

"Okay…now what?" Kiriko wondered aloud, hoping Raniq would get up soon. This was the longest she'd spent alone with Saph and it was starting to get tiresome.

The next hour only enhanced that feeling. There were no less than two diaper changes, and they played with the same toys and read the same books until she thought her brain was going to melt out of her ears. But Saph finally started whining for a 'baba' and Kiriko was relieved to make one, knowing sleep would follow soon after.

Relaxing in a living room chair with a bottle of warm milk, which Saph was now perfectly capable of holding herself, Kiriko began to nod off. Between her own busy schedule and the babysitting, she was mentally drained.

The next thing she knew, the sound of the door opening jolted her awake. Raniq was on the couch with a book. Saph was sound asleep, drooling on Kiriko's shirt. The door had been opened by Mara and Jojin, who were returning home. Raniq put her book down and let out a rattly cough.

"Hey, how are you two feeling?" she asked softly. "Better?"

Mara wiped her nose and nodded. "A little." She glanced at Kiriko coldly. "So I guess she'll sleep for you."

Kiriko blinked, still groggy. Although there'd always been an odd tension between them, neither had ever acknowledged it aloud. She was reluctant to even respond, lest Saph be woken up by her voice.

"There was a lot of crying first," she whispered with a surge of defensiveness.

It was so awkward. It was the most awkward encounter they'd ever had, made more intense by the fact that Saph was sleeping on her and no one wanted to be the one to wake her up. Mara couldn't snatch her away, and she must've realized it because she stalked off to her room.

Jojin gave Kiriko an apologetic look and shrugged, but followed without saying anything.

"What's her problem?" Kiriko muttered.

"Don't take it personally. The last few days have been really rough. She's doing her best. Keep in mind that she's still a child herself, trying to grow up while also dealing with very adult struggles."

"You'd think she'd be grateful that I'm doing her a favor."

"I think you overestimate the rationality of adolescent girls."

Saph woke up half an hour later, at which point Kiriko was more than happy to get rid of her. And for once, Saph's pitiful whines actually lessened when Mara took her.

Maybe she can tell I'm in a bad mood. Kiriko had worked herself up since the initial confrontation, and she wasn't going to let it go. "Look, I don't know what I did to give you such a complex, but I'm not going to run off with your kid, if that's what you're worried about. That's the absolute last thing I want. And…I respect you for sticking with the whole parenting gig because even looking after her for a couple of hours was exhausting."

"Yeah," Mara said with a stubborn set to her jaw. "It is. It's really hard."

They both looked over when Jojin got up and slipped out of the room. Kiriko scowled, but it quickly transformed into a wry half-smile when she turned back to Mara and saw a matching expression on her face.

"You two are really something else. You didn't deserve everything that happened to you."

Mara's bows furrowed as if she didn't understand the comment. "Deserve? Why do you think anything that happens to people is because of what they've done? Things just happen. It's just life."

"Depends on what you believe, I guess." Kiriko shifted her feet, reluctant to prolong this conversation. Now wasn't the time for a history lesson. "Well. Anyway. I'll leave you be."

She turned to go but Mara's voice chased her.

"Could've at least changed her first."

Kiriko froze and looked back, ready with a biting retort, but the expression on Mara's face hinted at snarky amusement. Could she actually be…joking? Kiriko decided to assume that she was.

She gave Mara a surly smirk and held her arms out—not a true offer, but a bluff. Mara smirked back but didn't move. It felt like they'd found something resembling common ground, or at the very least reached an impasse which both acknowledged was a little childish and were now capable of poking fun at.

Kiriko left her to it and returned to the main living area, where Raniq was busy in the kitchen.

"You don't have to cook for me. I can go get something at Su's."

"It's just leftovers. She's been sending me stuff every day since I got sick."

Content that she wasn't being a burden, Kiriko fell onto the couch and put her feet up on the tea table. After her brief nap, she wasn't really tired. Just…drained. And bored.

"You know I hate it when you do that," Raniq said matter-of-factly; it was an ongoing battle.

"Fine," Kiriko muttered with a dramatic eye roll, though she was equal parts amused and annoyed. Still, she put her feet down.

"What, ah…" Raniq coughed. It seemed more like a hesitation than an actual need to cough. "What did you and Mara talk about?"

"I think we have an understanding. For today, anyway. She's still gotta make it through her teenage years. I'm sure that'll be fun…"

Kiriko took a moment to wonder what sort of adults Mara and Jojin would be. What would it be like when Saph was their current age and they seemed like her older siblings to outsiders? Would they have more kids one day?

Rather than voice those mental ramblings, she asked, "How's the party planning going?"

"Frustrating. Everyone wants to come, but Mara is digging in her heels about the guest list. And I get it. Even though it's for Saph's birthday, she won't even remember it, so I'm inclined to make sure Mara and Jojin are happy with everything. But at the same time, anyone excluded is going to be offended."

"Hm. Sounds tough. Am I invited?" Kiriko joked.

Raniq paused her task just enough to turn and roll her eyes. "Of course you are."

"You never know. I could have a big fight with Mara between now and then. Maybe she won't want me there."

"You're an adult. I like to think you have more self-control than that. Anyway, I'm sure you'll be far too busy with rehearsals and practice and getting ready for tournament week."

It was a nice shift in topic. Pro-bending was something Kiriko never tired of talking about. "We're gonna win this year. I can feel it. We're so in sync. And come spring, I'll open my gym. After we win, every firebender in the city will want me to train them."

They did, in fact, win the championship. And it was far more than just a win; it was a slaughter. Now nineteen, Kiriko was stronger, faster, and more skilled than she'd been at age sixteen, and her teammates were at the top of their game, too. Even Niwen had remembered how much she enjoyed it after winning a few matches.

On the second day of the new year, after the Gala and another awesome Tura Tura performance, she headed to her new gym to meet anyone who wanted to sign up for membership or enroll in classes. Almost everything was ready for the grand opening in two weeks. She arrived promptly at eight in the morning, expecting a decent crowd, and found hundreds of people waiting.

"Miss Sato, Miss Sato!" countless voices clamored as they all rushed forward—an inexorable wave of people trying to get her attention.

"Whoa, okay, okay! Back up!" But her voice was drowned out and unheard by all but the closest. It was a challenge just to wade through them all to the front door and lock herself inside. I should've brought Anisa with me. How am I ever gonna get through all these people?

For several minutes, Kiriko hid in her office while people incessantly knocked on the front doors. Attention from fans was nothing new to her, but this… This was something else entirely. There were so many of them. All at once. So needy.

Finally, she remembered the telephone at her desk. The home number rang and rang with no answer. Asami's work number was a bust. Desperate, she tried one more person that might be able to help her.

"Hello, this is Captain Mako."

"Hey, it's Kiriko. Probably a stupid question, but are you busy? If you are, it's fine, don't worry. I'm not in trouble or anything."

Mako let out a short laugh. "What do you need?"

"I'm at my new gym so people can sign up before it opens. There's gotta be at least two hundred people here. It's crazy. I don't know if I can manage by myself and I can't reach Anisa or Mom. And I'm a little worried about letting in so many people, what with all the equipment."

"Ah… Okay... Tell you what: I'll send an officer over for crowd control, and then I'll come as soon as I can get away."

"Are you sure? I know you must have a thousand things to do that are way more important."

"You let me be the judge of that. But…it might be a couple of hours until I can get there."

Kiriko grinned into the phone. They'd never had this kind of relationship—where she would just randomly call him up and ask for a favor—and she found that she really liked it. "I'm sure I'll be here all day."

"Right, well, I'll see you later. An officer should be there soon."

It took less than five minutes for a very loud woman to show up, shouting and giving stern instructions to form an orderly line. Within another ten minutes, the main room was packed but organized. The queue snaked through the entire space and out the door.

"Thanks," she said to the officer, who stalked over with purpose.

"No problem." She was tall—even taller than Kiriko—and broad-shouldered. Somewhere in the neighborhood of forty, she had a fortitude about her that was hard not to admire. "It's been a slow day so I'm happy to have something to do."

"Well… Guess I better get started." Turning to the crowd, Kiriko raised her voice and said, "Alright, people. Listen up. First of all, thanks for coming. I wasn't expecting such a turnout and, obviously, space is limited, so not everyone's going to get a membership or a spot in a class. If you don't get in, please do try again in a few months.

"When you get to the front of the line, take a membership form. If you want to enroll in a class, there's another form for that. You can fill them out here and leave them with Officer Dalga—no, I do not have pens you can borrow—or take them home and either drop them off later or mail them back.

"Also, be honest about your current skill level, because once the spots are full, that's it. No changing. If you have any questions or concerns, you can ask me when it's your turn."

She went outside and repeated her speech, then posted up at her desk and got started while Officer Dalga kept order among the impatient waiters and made sure none of them fooled around with the equipment.

After saying it about two dozen times, Kiriko finally wrote 'membership form' and 'class enrollment form' on two cards above each stack of papers. But even so, she had to repeat herself frequently.

"You can put me at the top of the list if I make a sizable donation to your gym, right?" the rich ones would ask with a sly wink.

To which she would reply with a deadpan, "No."

Their faces would fall as if they'd never heard the word before, and they would snatch up their forms and stalk away.

"He just started firebending last week," a proud dad said, holding the hand of a shy boy who looked to be about five—the minimum age for classes.

Addressing the child, Kiriko asked, "Are you excited to start learning?"

The only answer was a terrified head shake. She glanced back up at the dad with a skeptical look.

"Heh," he chuckled awkwardly. "He's just nervous with all the people here. He begged to learn after watching the pro-bending tournament on television."

It seemed like everyone had a story. Or a special request. Or the mistaken belief that schmoozing and flattery would affect her.

There were all ages present, all shapes and sizes, and people from all walks of life. There were aspiring pro-benders and somber traditionalists, fit people and fat people, athletes and accountants, rich and poor. Everyone wanted Kiriko Sato—master, champion pro-bender, Avatar's protege—to train them.

And it felt good.

I wish you could see this, Mom. I know you'd be proud.

She ran out of forms after three hours, at which point she asked Dalga to inform those who remained to come back tomorrow morning. There was no shortage of angry grumbles, but soon everyone was gone and Kiriko stood up to stretch her stiff body.

"Shit, my ass hurts. I hate sitting still for so long."

"I guess I'll head out," Dalga said with a judgmental frown at the room, which was inexplicably littered with food wrappers, drinks, and other various trash. "Unless you need anything else?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks."

"Same time tomorrow?"

"Oh! That– That would be great! If you want to, I mean. Or I'll ask Captain Mako to send someone else if this is too boring for you."

Dalga crossed her arms and smirked. "'Captain Mako'? Do you really call him that?"

"Well, no… Usually, I just call him Mako. Or Uncle Mako."

"Huh."

"What?" Kiriko said slowly, confused.

"Nothing. I just think it's fascinating. Anyway, don't worry about me. I'll be here at eight."

True to his word, Mako showed up half an hour later. Kiriko had already finished cleaning up the mess and was more than ready for something to eat.

"Where is everyone?" he asked.

"I ran out of forms."

"Oh. Sorry I couldn't help."

"Take me to Chang's for lunch and we'll call it even."

"You got it."

While they ate, he asked her about all the logistics. "You're really not going to charge for membership? Are you sure you'll be able to turn a profit?"

"I charge a fee for group classes, and an even higher one for private lessons. Mom helped me go through all the numbers. Four classes a day, five days a week, for twenty-six weeks a year. It'll be just enough for overhead and the staff wages. And a small salary for me, but it's really just pocket money. It's not like I plan on moving out any time soon. If ever."

"That's a lot of classes. You're going to be really busy."

"I know. I want to be. I'll be here even when there are no classes, giving training tips and such."

His eyes crinkled in a faint smile. "Just make sure you set aside some time to have a little fun every now and then."

"Like you do?" Kiriko retorted, though with a good-natured smirk.

"You don't want to be like me. I'm a lost cause. A cautionary tale."

"Don't worry, I'll have plenty of fun during pro-bending season."

"Will you make it to Kyori's wedding?"

She tried not to make a face, but it was immediately apparent that she failed.

"What? You don't want to go?"

Kiriko shrugged. "I don't like weddings. They're boring."

"It won't be anything like the last one. You'll probably know almost everyone there. And it'll be nice to see Saph, right? I doubt you'll get a lot of chances to visit Zaofu once classes start."

It was true, she knew. Raniq promised to send lots of letters and photos, but it wasn't the same. According to the most recent report, given at the New Year's Gala, Saph was on the cusp of walking.

"Hopefully she'll remember me. Last time I saw her, she'd turned into a clingy mama's girl."

The comment brought on a dull ache that radiated outward from her chest. I miss you so much, Mom. When would it stop? Would the pain of loss ever go away for good?

No, I don't want it to. Remembering is better than forgetting. "Were me and Anisa ever like that? Did we go through phases of wanting one mom more?"

Mako glanced up from his lunch and smiled, though there was sadness in his eyes. "You did. It was very frustrating for them because it seemed to change every week. They said–" He paused to laugh. "They said you both tried to call Asami 'Dad' for about two weeks when you were, oh, maybe three?"

"Really?"

"They thought you picked it up from your cousins. Spirits know why you decided it was Asami."

Kiriko was put in mind of something Korra used to say jokingly. "She was in charge."

"By that logic, are you saying the man is the one 'in charge' in most marriages?" he asked her with a cocked eyebrow, amused.

"Oh, well… Traditional gender roles, etcetera. I don't have to agree with them to accept that they exist. But if I ever get married, I'll definitely be the one in charge."

"I thought romance was overrated and weddings were boring?"

She smirked and flicked a piece of rice at him. "I said 'if'. Big if. I won't chase that life. I don't understand why everyone I know is getting married so young. I still feel like a kid most of the time. Opening a gym? Starting a business? That's the most adult thing I can imagine doing right now. Raniq was always desperate to escape from her family and build a new one, but it seems like such a waste. Maybe when I'm in my thirties, I'll want that stuff. Not now. I've got the best years of my life ahead of me."

"You're right. There's no rush. Enjoy your life. You can do anything you want."

"Teijo," Kiriko said sternly after snuffing out the rogue flame before it could do any damage. "You need to be more careful."

She regarded the pint-sized boy before her, who didn't even reach her hips. It was the same kid from that first day of handing out forms—the terrified one. His dad had been honest: He was eager to learn and an absolute firecracker. Also no longer terrified.

His mother, who sat in a row of chairs against the wall with the parents of the other nine kids in the class, was arguably more eager for him to learn. To hear her tell it, their home was a bit worse for the wear since the firebending started.

"I don't wanna be careful!" Teijo screeched. "I wanna be strong!"

Kiriko crouched down to look him in the eye. "Do you wanna hurt people?"

"Hmm…" He appeared to give it some serious consideration. "Only people I don't like."

Mother of Faces, I did not sign up to parent these kids away from their violent tendencies. "Listen. I know one of the most important policemen in the whole city. If you hurt anyone, he's gonna lock you up in jail. So you need to be careful and let me teach you how to control your firebending. Got it?"

By the end of the brief speech, Teijo's eyes were like saucers. He snapped his mouth shut and gave a rapid nod.

"Good."

The best part was when Mako actually showed up right as the class wrapped up.

"AHHHH," Teijo screamed as he took off for the bathroom after catching sight of the uniform. "The policeman's here to take me to jail!"

Kiriko laughed so hard she snorted.

"Did I miss something?" Mako asked, looking more tired than usual.

"Heh. He was misbehaving earlier and I told him you'd throw him in jail. Good timing, by the way."

"Kiriko…"

"What? Listen, if you met this kid, you'd get it. I'm just trying to keep everyone safe. And keep him from burning down his house." After a few more chuckles, she managed to rein herself in enough to wonder why Mako had stopped by. "So are you just checking up on me or did you need something?"

His already somber expression deepened into a worried frown. "I…have some sad news, actually."

Everything had been going so well. Pro-bending, dancing, the gym… Kiriko still missed Korra every second of every day, but it was easier to manage now. Mako's dire pronouncement made it all come back—a flood of emotions that caused a ripple of goosebumps and a sick feeling that crept up her throat.

"...What?"

"Lin isn't doing so well. She's very ill." His voice choked up and he paused. "It came on so fast. I'm just about to head over to Zaofu to see her again, in case she… Well, anyway. I thought you might want to come, too. This is your last class today, right?"

"Yeah," Kiriko said with a nod, trying to ignore the burning in her nose. While she and Lin weren't exactly close, they did have a comfortable rapport. Her death would be a terrible loss. "I want to come."

"Hey, Lin," Kiriko murmured, sitting in a chair by her hospital bed. The only sounds in the room were the beeping of machines and the hum of the light overhead. She reached for a wrinkly old hand and found the skin clammy and cold. "I don't know if you can hear me, but hopefully some part of you knows I stopped by."

A rogue tear dripped Kiriko's cheek and she wiped it away. This was a different kind of pain than spending months hoping to find Korra. There was a sense of grim finality in seeing this once-strong woman look so…frail. Weak and pale. Was she in pain? Did she dream?

"Mako said he got to talk to you last week. I'm glad. And I just want you to know…if it's too hard—if you just want to rest—that's okay. You've done a lot of good for a lot of people. You don't owe anyone anything." She sighed and lowered her voice to add, "But if you could wake up and let me say goodbye before you go, that would be…pretty cool of you."

A restless night was passed at Nani's house, which was…extra exhausting. Saph was a mobile menace, getting into everything and loudly voicing her displeasure if she didn't get her way.

"That's my hairbrush," Kiriko said. "Can I please have it back?"

"No!"

"You don't even know why you're saying no."

"No!"

Sadly, the threats she'd used with Teijo wouldn't work on a toddler whose grasp of language was roughly equal to that of a parrot-hawk. There was only one solution Kiriko's tired mind could think of.

"Raniq!"

"What?" she called from the other room.

"Saph won't give me my hairbrush!"

"Are you kidding me right now? She's sixteen months old! Just take it away from her."

Kiriko crossed her arms belligerently. "But she'll cry."

"So what?"

"I don't want to be the bad guy."

Raniq finally appeared in the doorway, visibly exasperated. "I've got three kids. I don't need another," she grumbled, taking the brush from Saph, who instantly had a meltdown. "I swear, Mara and Jojin can sleep through anything. I hope Cinda gets here soon. I need to go to work."

"I'll come with you. I want to see Lin again before I go home."

Unfortunately, she arrived to find no change. Mako was there, reading the newspaper aloud to her. He didn't notice Kiriko right away and she just stood there and listened, finally realizing that Lin was probably the closest thing he had to a mother figure. She'd been his Chief and mentor for years.

After a minute or so, Kiriko knocked on the open door.

"Oh, hey," he said after seeing her. His face was paler than usual, drawn and weary. "Didn't know you were still here."

"I'm catching the ten o'clock train." She approached and sat on the edge of the bed at the very foot of it. "Are you coming back today?"

"No. I'm taking some leave. I've got tons saved up," he added with a humorless laugh. "I'll be here 'til the end…"

Kiriko wanted to cry. She could feel that urge filling her. But…for some reason, it just wouldn't come. The wave of emotion built and built but simply would not break. If she stayed in that room any longer—that room with harsh light and chemical smells assaulting her—she was going to go crazy.

"I should get going. I don't want to miss my train."

Mako stood and gave her a quick but strong hug. His height made her feel so young again. "I'll tell her you were here when she wakes up."

If she wakes up.

As she left the medical center, Kiriko ran into a man she didn't know but who clearly knew her.

"You're Kiriko, right?" He was tall and broad, though not especially athletic, and looked to be in his mid-thirties. Glasses with thin wire frames gave him a studious energy.

"Yep."

"Bolin said you'd come into town. I'm glad I caught you before you left. My name is Renyu."

It finally clicked; he wasn't a random pro-bending fan. "Ohh. You're writing a book about Lin, right?"

"Yes, a biography. An accurate one. She's mentioned you a few times. Would you be willing to sit for an interview?"

There was something about his brisk, matter-of-fact attitude that rubbed her the wrong way. "I'm headed back to Republic City on the ten o'clock train. I have to work."

"Ah, of course, of course. Will you be here for the upcoming wedding? We could do it then. Alternatively, I'm willing to meet you in Republic City."

"Lin is dying," Kiriko said through clenched teeth. "And all you care about is writing this book? Have a little compassion for her family and friends."

Renyu's eyebrows shot up, though he looked more confused than offended. "I am her family. I'm doing this for her, for her legacy, not for myself. And I know that things don't look good for her right now. All the more reason to make this biography the best that it can be."

Everything he said was so calm and measured, even in confrontation. Not very Beifong-esque. How was this guy related to Lin?

But was he right? Would she want the book to be published, whether she was alive to see it or not?

"I'll be here for the wedding," Kiriko relented. "We can talk then."

"There," Raniq said with a satisfied smile for Kiriko, looking at her in the mirror. "Perfect. Nice and simple."

Kiriko inspected the braided knot. It looked nice—not her usual style, but good for a formal setting. And it would keep her cool. The dress was comfortable, too, and not overly extravagant. It was the height of fashion in Republic City. The only other accoutrements in Kiriko's ensemble were delicate earrings of topaz. They matched her eyes and caught the light when she turned.

"No makeup," Raniq continued. "Let's give the bride a fighting chance to be the center of attention."

"I think people will be paying more attention to Zira than to me."

A wistful look appeared don Raniq's face. "Ah! Her little baby bump is so cute! You may be right."

"With any luck, no one will even notice me."

"Well, that might be taking it a little far. You're still stunning, even without trying."

Kiriko, in her youthful stupidity, couldn't prevent an irrational desire from creeping into her thoughts.

Maybe he'll finally realize. Maybe he'll see me dressed up and get cold feet about spending the rest of his life with the girl he was on and off with for years. Maybe he'll regret not taking a chance on someone new. Someone like me.

She hated herself for thinking it, for looking in the mirror and wishing they would break up on their wedding day. More importantly, she hated herself for even wanting him to do that. For being so pathetic as to consider using her looks to lure him away from the woman he knew and loved.

What is wrong with me? Why can't I get past this?

"Shall I leave you two alone for a minute?" Raniq teased, breaking her morose reverie.

"Huh? Who?" Kiriko frantically tried to figure out if any of her thoughts had been unintentionally voiced.

"You and your reflection."

She let out an irritated scoff. "Let's go."

Raniq picked up her camera, which she brought everywhere since receiving it for her birthday earlier that year, and went out into the main living area to talk to Mara and Jojin. They were at the table, busy with some schoolwork.

"If you need anything, just call the number I left by the phone. I can be here in five minutes."

"Yeah, yeah, we'll be fine," Mara said petulantly. Just like a normal kid. It would've been funny if it wasn't also sad. And kind of annoying.

Once outside, Kiriko said, "Everyone's gonna be upset that you didn't bring Saph."

"It's not worth the trouble. Mara and Jojin do not want to go. And as much as I love Saph, I'd like to relax for once, but they don't want her passed around to people they don't know well."

"What they don't know won't hurt them."

Raniq shot a judgmental look at her. "You want me to lie to them? Why? So you can play with Saph until you get tired of her and then give her to someone else?"

"Fuck's sake," Kiriko grumbled, though she couldn't deny the accusation. "I'm already in a shitty enough mood. Gimme a break."

"You know I'm sympathetic, but I think I've been very patient with you regarding the Valen situation. At some point, you do need to move on. Now is a great opportunity. Maybe then you could actually be happy for them and enjoy this day."

It was all said very calmly and in her trademark kind, genuine way, which only made the blunt words hurt more. The anger Kiriko wanted to feel slipped from her grasp; all she could manage was stubborn indignation.

"Thanks for the tip. I'll get right on that," she muttered, though half-heartedly. The last thing she wanted was to get into an argument.

It seemed Raniq felt the same. "This should be a happy day. Let's try to focus on the good things."

Her optimism didn't help Kiriko in the slightest, but the diplomatic response did at least keep her from complaining anymore. She put her shoulders back, held her head high, and made up her mind to get through the wedding without anyone else finding out she was miserable.

They arrived at one of the estate's courtyards a couple of minutes later. Most of the guests were already there, some mingling while others were already sitting in the chairs lined up in neat rows. Raniq abandoned her to talk to Zira, probably about pregnancy and babies.

Momentarily alone, Kiriko took a moment to look around. It was simple and beautiful. A pale wooden arch decorated with lilies was the main centerpiece in front of the chairs. Past where the guests were gathered, tables and a buffet table were set up in a flagstoned area with a space in the middle cleared for dancing.

A band played soft, calming music in the shade of an ancient oak tree. Everyone had a drink in their hand. In all, there were only about fifty people there, including Lin, who was looking much better.

Kiriko smiled, though sadly. Everyone had accepted Lin's inevitable death, and while there was certainly relief that it had been narrowly avoided by what seemed a minor miracle, it was impossible not to worry about her.

She pushed those dour thoughts away and approached the table that appeared to be the source of the drinks—two punch bowls full of something bright red and fruity. Presumably, one had alcohol and the other didn't. She served herself from the closest one, not really caring which it was, and found the taste overpoweringly sweet but otherwise mild.

Spirits, I'm thirsty, she realized as soon as the drink hit her lips. The entire cup was gone in seconds and she got a refill.

"Good, huh?" the man attending the table said. "It's my special blend."

"Yeah, it's good."

Kiriko was on her third cup by the time they were asked to take their seats for the ceremony. She found a place near the back with Anisa and Asami on her left and Raniq on her right.

Valen came out first, wearing handsome Zaofu-style formalwear and a big grin on his face. The smile lit him up from head to toe and Kiriko sighed wistfully. Her head lolled back and to the side, which made her notice the look on Anisa's face.

'What are you doing?' blue eyes asked in silent reproval.

That was the first hint to Kiriko that she'd chosen the wrong punch bowl. Still, it was just a fleeting thought and she couldn't fully convince herself. Not quite yet. It hadn't tasted alcoholic at all.

She looked at her cup, which was still about a third full. The solution was clear: Tasting it would be the best experiment for her new theory. So she took a sip. Then another. And another.

It was impossible to draw any conclusions. Her tongue felt numb. But…it was tasty and she was thirsty. Soon the cup was empty and she looked at its bottom with morose regret.

Raniq reached over and snatched it from her grasp. "Pull yourself together," she whispered in Kiriko's ear.

That was the second hint that something wasn't quite right.

The nail in the coffin happened just after Kyori appeared. Kiriko couldn't bring her into focus. The light that Valen produced just by smiling was far too bright. It was all she could see, staring at him while he stared at his bride.

A hot, burning sensation was an almost welcome distraction. What was it? Fire? On her face? Kiriko reached up to feel tears streaming down her cheeks.

Crying? In public? Like a child?

Oh, shit.

I'm…drunk.

In a moment of panic, her hand shot out to find Raniq's arm. Something to hold onto. A cool hand patted hers and stayed there. It helped. Kiriko closed her eyes and let herself appreciate the fuzziness of her thoughts. The ceremony passed her by with very little of it brushing her awareness.

What were those words being spoken? A poem?

"...love that burns like a kiln…"

"...mix the pieces…"

"...and in death, we will share one bed."

It didn't make any sense but spawned a bizarre mental image of little clay figurines breaking and reforming and fusing together.

The next thing Kiriko knew, Anisa was hauling her to her feet. She automatically brought her hands up to clap alongside everyone else, though her only thoughts were about the pleasant fuzziness in her mind and how much she'd like another drink to prolong it.

The rest was a blur of dancing and eating and generally having a good time. Somehow, she'd found the perfect level of drunkenness and that far-away feeling was only further enhanced. She even danced with Nik during one of the more upbeat songs.

"Fiiiiine," she said with a dramatic eye roll when he asked.

"Really?"

"But you better not be dishrep– diserspec–" The word would not come, so she gave up on it. "You better behave."

Nik laughed as they went to join the revelers. "I remember what happened last time someone touched you without permission. I like all my organs where they are, thanks."

Sadly, it was impossible to maintain the high for long. As the sun began to set on the party, so did it set on Kiriko's good mood. The feeling of lightness was replaced by nausea and she stumbled into a more secluded garden to purge herself.

Everything came out at once—food, drink, and emotion. Dusk crept in and the shadows lengthened. Everything in the world was wrong. Korra was gone forever. Valen was out of reach for good. Neither could be replaced. If there was anything Kiriko was sure of in this moment, it was the raw truth of that.

Whether fortunately or unfortunately, her solitude didn't last.

"There you are," Asami said. "I've been looking ev– Spirits, what's wrong?"

Kiriko burst into tears. She hated it. She felt like a child throwing a tantrum for a silly reason. But her mother simply walked over silently and wrapped her up in a strong hug.

"What is it?" she murmured, gentle hands rubbing up and down in a soothing pattern. "You seemed like you were having a good time before. All smiles."

"He didn't– didn't w-want me. Not ever. Why not?"

Asami made a soft sympathetic noise but didn't appear to have a response. After a minute or so, Kiriko was able to compose herself enough to pull away, though she still drew in ragged, sniffly breaths.

"I know this is stupid. He and I barely know each other. So why does this hurt so much? Still?"

"Sometimes it's not about what we want, but what we can't have."

"It's just– It's not fair. He's the only person I've ever been interested in. The only guy who doesn't look at me like a horny creep. I might as well be invisible to him. And now– now it's over. I've officially lost my chance forever."

"Listen," Asami said, cupping Kiriko's jaw to wipe the tears with her thumbs. "I know it feels hopeless right now, but you're so young still. There is someone out there for you. I promise. You just have to be patient and keep your heart open."

A/N: "Why does this crazy writer keep on harping on the 'Valen' issue?" you may ask. Well, dear readers, I do have a good reason for it. If you've read DoM you may be able to guess lol.