Chapter 5
Maria arrived home about an hour after Brigitta left. Georg was still in his easy chair, but far from relaxed. He barely acknowledged Maria when she greeted him.
"Georg," Maria prodded, but he didn't answer. "Georg?"
Maria was concerned and gently touched Georg's cheek with ice cold hands.
"Darling?"
Georg startled and shook himself to attention. "Oh, I'm sorry, my love. I was thinking, I didn't hear."
"Are you all right?" Maria asked as she hung up her coat. "You look pale. Are you feeling alright?"
"Physically," Georg replied. "I'm very stiff, but I'm also old, so there's that. Let me fix us some tea and I'll fill you in. In all my years as a father, this is a first."
Maria nodded and stoked the fire to warm the house up a little more while Georg fixed the tea. With ten children, eight children-in-law, and twenty-one and a half grandchildren all sorts of things happened daily and in the changing world, issues came up neither Georg at 73 nor Maria at 48 would have ever dreamed of in Austria. If something was rattling Georg, it had to be huge.
Maria sat in her chair and Georg in his after he served the tea. Georg cleared his throat. Maria felt sick. "Georg, just tell me. Is one of the children sick?"
"Oh no. No!" Georg was quick to reassure her. "That's actually what I thought when Brigitta first arrived. Maria, she was so upset."
"Brigitta? " Marie was a little surprised. Brigitta was not prone to many open emotions. She was a lot like the outward exterior Georg portrayed, but behind that mask Georg was a very emotional man. Brigitta was the same. "And the kids are all right?"
"Yes, they are with Louisa until probably the day after tomorrow, then who knows if they'll stay here with us or if Peter will go to his parents," Georg speculated. "Brigitta didn't tell me any of her plans beyond telling Peter when he gets home tomorrow she wants a divorce."
Maria gasped, "A divorce? Is he seeing someone else or did he hurt her or... I knew they were having problems since Edit was born, but I never knew it went so far. Why didn't she tell us before if..".
"She says he didn't hurt her or the children, if he did he'd be dead by now and riding around in the trunk of my car," Georg replied. "Old man or not, I still know several ways to kill a man with one well placed finger. No, he didn't hurt anyone and Brigitta doesn't suspect he's cheating. It's worse than that. They fell out of love, Maria. Brigitta is tired and frustrated; she wants out. "
Maria scoffed, "Well, did you tell her she can't get out? She made a vow, before God…Out under any circumstance that isn't sanctified by the Church…"
It was clear from the look on Georg's face what he told Brigitta. "You gave your blessing to this, didn't you?"
Georg sighed. He had hoped Maria would be more understanding in this, but he suspected she could respond this way. That's why he chose to speak to her alone.
"Yes," Georg replied. "I told our daughter she has our full support in whatever decision she makes. Our little girl is miserable. She feels angry, lost, used, and she no longer feels anything for Peter but resentment. That's not what marriage is."
Maria nodded her agreement. "All marriages have their problems, Georg, and all women feel a little surpressed when the house is full of children and their husband is always at work."
"And you have felt this way?" Georg queried. "If you did, I never knew it."
"Well, it was different with us. When I spoke to Brigitta about this a long time ago I acknowledged that. The difference in our ages and your previous marriage, also your nature in general…"
"And what of the fact that I love you, Maria, and respect you for who you are? Something I know Peter Hamilton never did for Brigitta!" Georg was growing angry and hurt at Maria's words. He never knew she felt anyway but totally happy and content in their life together.
"That made all the difference, Darling," Maria replied, seeing Georg was upset. "I have loved you for so long. I think Peter never learned about the selflessness of love, but I think, I hope he can learn and the marriage can be saved. We must support her, but we also need to reason with her. This could be a gross error, not to mention a sin and a scandal that would follow Brigitta and the children forever."
Georg shut his eyes, a strong headache forming in his temples. "You're right, it'll be that, but the look in her eyes. Yes, there's determination, but there's also so much pain. She's miserable, Maria, and that will impact the children too."
Maria got up and crossed the room to take Georg in her arms. He returned the embrace fiercely. "I am sorry if you ever felt anything besides cherished by me, Maria. I never knew…"
"I always knew," Maria whispered. "We can talk to Brigitta again. Maybe this is what Peter needs to wake up and see what he has and what he stands to lose. Let's go to bed, hmm?
Maria took Georg by the hand and he let her lead him to their bedroom, though sleep was elusive for both of them.
Brigitta had packed suitcases, one for her, and one for each child. She had been planning this for a while, a month. She had obtained a job in the secretarial pool at the law firm where Marta's husband Joseph was a junior partner, and rented a small house outside of Stowe using money she saved from the household budget using tricks Maria taught her after leaving Austria. All she had to do now was wait.
When Peter walked in that evening the house was cool and quiet. There were no children making noise, no warm fire, no aroma of supper on the stove; nothing that made it feel like home. There was only Brigitta with a packed suitcases sitting expressionless on the sofa.
"Brigitta?" Peter asked. "What's that? Where are the children?"
"Sit down, Peter," Brigitta replied. "We really need to talk."
Peter's entire body seemed to go rigid as he took a seat on the opposite side of the couch. "What is this about Brigitta? Why do you have a packed suitcase? For the goodwill at the church? I'll go through my stuff on Saturday, okay?"
"The bag is mine," Brigitta explained. "The kids are at my sister's house. They are all fine, but we will need to talk to them."
Peter was a lot of things but not stupid. He saw the handwriting on the wall in this. "You're leaving me?"
"Yes," Brigitta replied. "I'm leaving, Peter. I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore. I can't continue to pretend I'm a happily married woman when I'm far from it and have been for a long time."
Peter shifted his gaze away from Brigitta to her hands clasped in her lap. "I thought it was some kind of phase because of that book Ella was always talking about. I never thought.. you're leaving me!" Peter got up and started to pace. "Is there someone else?"
"No!" Brigitta said quickly. "I wish it were that for either of us and it would make more sense, but Peter, our marriage is coming apart. We aren't a team anymore, we aren't intimate and haven't been in 6 years. You don't love me anymore, We hardly ever talk and more to the point, I'm so sorry, but I don't love you anymore, Not like that. We can't keep pretending everything is fine when we should admit we need to end this. It's unfair to both of us. It's quitting time!"
Brigitta was calm, steady, and totally unemotional. She was as sure of her decision to end the 15-year marriage then she was in her decision to start it.
"So what now? What about our family? This house? Everything we built over the last 15 years? What about that?" Peter's voice now had an edge of anger.
"We'll sort all that out," Brigitta replied. "I'm renting a place just outside Stowe's city limits and I have a job in Burlington that starts Monday. I'm sure my sisters will help with the kids after school, and you can always see them."
"Wait a minute!" Peter nearly shouted. "You already have a place to live and a job? How long have you been thinking about this? Why is this the first time you said anything?"
"Peter, honestly?" Brigitta hoped Peter would see in hindsight all the warnings he had. "I've been telling you for at least three years I wasn't happy, that I needed more from you, but you wouldn't listen to me. You didn't hear me, Peter, not for a long time and I can't... No, I won't keep living like this. I won't be invisible in my own home, in my own life! I won't do it. When we were good, we were good, but now there is no we anymore, there's you and there is me, no us."
Peter swallowed a thick lump of emotion "So that's it? Suddenly we're over? You're saying it's over?"
Brigitta took a deep breath and picked up the two suitcases that she hadn't already stashed in her car. "You're still not listening, Peter. I'm saying it's been over."
Without any other comments or expression, without even waiting for Peter to reply, Brigitta squared off her shoulders and walked out of the house. She never looked back.
A/N: There you have it folks. Brigitta calls it quits with the support of her old world father, but not so much her mother. Kind of opposite what we would expect to see.
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