Harry Potter is 'The Boy Who Lived'. At least that is what everyone believes. He's died at some of the most inopportune moments. His aunt killed him with a frying pan. His uncle drowned him. He was killed by a teacher that was possessed. He was killed by a hippogryph. He was killed by a dementor. He was killed by a basilisk. He fell off his broom from a few hundred feet in the air. He was eaten by inferi. Finally, he was killed fighting Tom Riddle. He just doesn't remember any of this. Who would want to remember how they died, let alone nine times?

Harry's eyes slowly opened, and he was confused. He was sitting in an office waiting area. A very bland office. The floor was covered by cheap grey carpet squares. The walls were covered in cheap fake wood paneling. The room was lit by three cheap fluorescent lights. Then he noticed was that there was no smell. Everywhere smelled of something. Just not here. Wherever that was. Off to the left was a larger room filled with, of all things, a "cube farm". Cubicles as far as he could see, and no windows. The last thing he noticed was the very buxom redhead standing to his right, screaming his name.

"Potter! Damnit, Potter! Wake your ass up," shouted the redhead. "I swear, every time you do this it takes you longer to wake up."

"What," Harry murmured. "Um. What, where and who?".

The redhead laughed. She was the only thing that wasn't dull. She was dead pasty white. And naked. Like a cadaver.

She slapped him and turned away. Her buttocks moved with a life of their own. "Follow me," she said as she stormed off down the hallway.

Like any teenaged boy would, Harry complied. He was entranced by the sway of her hips.

After walking through the cube farm for what seemed an eternity, the redhead turned right and walked through a plain wood door. On the wall next to the door was a cheap looking brass placard holder with the name 'Angela' and what Harry guessed was her position, 'Delayed Eternity and Terrestrial Hospitality Agent'.

"Death," asked Harry. "Am I dead?"

"Astute as always," replied Angela as she sat behind her desk. Her breasts defied gravity and simply bounced a few times as she settled in. "Stop staring at them."

"What?"

"My boobs. I always have to tell you to stop staring at them."

"Maybe if you wore clothes…"

"You always say that. I seriously hate the illusions the management places on us."

"You have an illusion on you that makes you look naked?"

"Not quite. Have you ever read the description of an angel in the Bible? We're supposed to be terrifying to look at. So, the upper management makes those of us that deal with humans, look like humans. They just forgot to include clothes in the illusion," explained Angela. "It really sucks when hormonal teenagers come through. Not only are we naked, but we change based on who the audience is. Yesterday, one of your friends came though, Miss Lavender Brown. All she saw was a tall redhead stud with an enormous…"

"Gotcha," interrupted Harry. "So Lavender is dead?"

"Yes," said Angela sadly. "She was a very pretty young woman."

"Yes, she was," replied Harry. "Okay. I'm dead. You are the personification of Death."

"Correct."

"Your sign says, 'delayed eternity'," said Harry. "That means I'm being held up for something."

"Correct. It seems that you've grown up a bit since the last trip."

"Last," started Harry. He put his head in his hands as he sat down. "How many times?"

"This one makes nine. Want me to tell you how?"

"No. I guess it really doesn't matter, does it?"

"Not really. The rules are different this time. You'll remember everything including the doubled time periods where you were sent back to just before you died."

"So, you are sending me back?"

Angela got a wicked smile. "You betcha sweets. Fate has her knickers in a twist over you. You are destined to destroy Riddle. Along the way, you meet your soulmates and live to ripe old age of 130. With lots of little babies running around."

"Um… Wait. Two soulmates? Who? Ginny and I broke up," said Harry.

"Not the ginger mattress. I swear she bedded nearly every boy and a few girls in her year. I'm not gonna go into her obsession with the centaurs. I mean that Granger girl and the elder Greengrass daughter."

Harry turned green and nearly threw up. "Ginny," he choked out.

"Yes, Ginny. The ginger whore. I swear, she's worse than her mother."

Getting his breathing under control, Harry slumped in the chair. "Hermione and, um Daphne? Do they know? Or rather, did they know?"

"Greengrass did. There was even a betrothal contract between the two of you. Fumblemore managed to get that negated somehow. That idiot has messed you up so much Harry."

"Contract?"

"Old tradition, but they still pop up from time to time. Listen, we don't have a lot of time on our hands here. If I can't get you back into the timestream in the next few hours, you'll be relegated to living here. In this office. Probably shuffling memos or delivering mail. You aren't an angel, so you'll never get a decent job. We need to get you to processing and settle on the right time to send you back."

"I can go back to any time in my life?"

"No. It can be right before any major point in your life. Any fixed moment. Some things cannot be changed and will always occur. Your competing in the Tournament will have to happen, your sorting, Sirius dying, and Dumbledore's death are all examples of this. They must happen when they did and any attempt to subvert them will result in a more horrific version of the event."

"Damn," muttered Harry. "I had hoped."

"I know. But remember, Sirius and your parents are well and in the ever-after waiting for you."

"Do you have any recommendations for when," asked Harry.

"I have three. First, we could return you to the day before you visited Diagon Alley with Hagrid."

"Maybe. I could go through the train barrier without the Weasleys. After Ron abandoning us, I'm questioning just how much of a friend he was."

"Possible. Looking at the history, he was rather, um…"

"Fair-weather?"

"Yes," said Angela. "Second, you could go to just before the Tri-Wizard Tournament and be better prepared. Maybe catch Riddle off guard in the Cemetery."

"But then I'd probably still have to see Cedric killed."

"True. Third, you could go to your fifth year. Maybe not have so many issues with Umbridge."

"No. Being in any time before Sirius' death would have me wanting to try and save him. As you said, it would be more horrific." Harry sat silently for a few moments with his head in his hands. Looking up, he said, "The week after Sirius' death. I can get to Hermione and together we can approach Daphne. That summer, we can search for and destroy the Horcruxes. I'll still have to humor Dumbledore and chase after the locket to ensure his destiny is fulfilled."

"Hmm. Smart boy. I knew I liked you," said Angela with a wink. "All right. I'll make a note of this and get it sent off for typing up. It shouldn't take long."

There was a knock at the door. "Angela," said a feminine voice. "I hear r. Potter is back again."

Sighing, Angela said, "Yes, Miss Director. Please come in. He and I are making plans for a final return."

The woman walked in and sat next to Harry. She was a stark contrast to Angela. Her skin was dark chocolate brown, and her hair was pure white. Like Angela, she was naked and well endowed. "Hello Mr. Potter. I am the Director of D.E.A.T.H. My name is Thana." She smiled as Harry nodded and gulped.

"Thana? As in Thanatos? Well, under other circumstances I might say it is nice to meet you. But..." Harry let the sentence die off. He started again. "I see the illusion works on being employed here."

Thana laughed and turned to Angela. "Oh my. He is observant, isn't he?" She turned back to Harry, "Yes, Mr. Potter. I am the being referred to as Thanatos. I have a further proposition for the two of you. I am willing to send Mr. Potter back one last time, with a few bonuses."

Angela sucked in a deep breath before asking, "Just what do you have in mind?"

"He will retain all of his memories, including this visit. We will also provide him with some training and information concerning the horcruxes. This will occur within the time dampening fields so that we can make fully sure he gets the help he needs."

"Wait," said Harry. "If you lot oversee the dying, why can't you just go, and snatch Riddle yourselves? Grab all the horcruxes and just snip him from life?"

"I, and my employees, are prevented from direct interference with the mortal plane. We can handle the souls of the dying and, in some cases send them back. You are different. The Moirai, you might know them as the Fates, have taken a keen interest in you. They are my sisters and Chronos is our brother. They all assure me that you are a nexus point in your culture. After delving into the files and reading what has happened to you and seeing what my sisters have in store, I am inclined to agree."

Harry nodded. "I'm not happy with the manipulation. I wasn't happy with Dumbledore doing it. I understand it. I'm just not happy. I'll take what you have to offer, and I'll do what you ask if I am able. I want this all to be over."

"Good on you," said Thana. She stood and looked down at her breasts. "These things are always getting in the way and make people feel awkward."

Angela laughed. "No more so than the dangly bits we have when the ladies show up."

Harry blushed a bit. "We have issues with those too. Wear the wrong shorts or no shorts and you end up sitting on them."

The two angels laughed. It did amazing things to their bodies and Harry's body reacted to that. "And then there's that."

"Oh dear," said Angela. "I keep forgetting that those who aren't ready to move on, still react. Sorry luv." She took a breath and moved on. "Let's get you to the time dampening room and get some information poured into the brain of yours. I suspect you'll give your two girls a run for their money in the intelligence game when we're done."

Harry suddenly perked up. "Wait. Will I be able to tell them anything about this? Hermione might believe me, but I don't Daphne that well. And I notice that neither of you has told me just how I died this time."

"You never remember how," said Angela. "That's part of helping people move on. If they don't know, they don't dwell on it." She looked at her desk, obviously not sure she wanted to say anything.

Thana spoke up, "You were fighting Riddle. All the horcruxes were gone. Your friend stunned you just as Riddle cast a killing curse. He didn't fire it at Riddle and miss. He meant to hit you."

"Ron," croaked Harry.

"Yeah," said Angela.

"I knew he wasn't a great friend, but that…" Harry looked at the floor, his eyes beginning to water. "Why? Do you know why he did it?"

Angela said, "He wanted to be the hero. Riddle thanked him for the assist right before slicing his throat with a spell. Ron honestly thought that you had worn riddle down enough for him to make the killing shot. Ron came through the office right before you and was escorted to the basement. The rest of the Weasleys and Hermione never arrived. Riddle gave them to the Dementors."

"You must win this one Mr. Potter. Riddle will go on to wipe out most of the non-magical world governments and bring nuclear bombs down on his own head and the survivors in Britain," said Thana. "He has cheated me far too many times. My sisters have shown me his thread. It is corrupted and black in an otherwise beautiful tapestry. Likewise, some of his followers are blackened. Surprisingly, two are simply grey. This points to possible redemption."

Harry looked perplexed. "Who?"

"Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange. Now before you get all angry and screamy, Malfoy really did believe he was doing what was right. In the end he and Draco turned on Riddle but were cut down. Bellatrix is an entirely different issue. She is the product of years of loyalty potions, rape, Imperio curses and obliviations. Her husband and brother-in-law are to blame for all four." Thana let that sink in for a moment before continuing. "She killed Sirius. I know. She wasn't in her right mind and was acting on the whims of her husband."

"So, she isn't insane?"

"Oh no. She's quite insane at this point, but her actions aren't her fault. After you died, Molly Weasley killed her with a desiccation spell. She literally pulled all the water from her body, and she turned to dust. Those household cleaning spells are a bitch."

Harry had to grimace. It was a horrible way to die, and he was now conflicted on if she deserved it. He sighed and leaned back in his seat. "Okay. Lucius and Draco get saved. Bellatrix gets saved. Riddle dies. What else do I need to do?"

Angela smiled, "You gotta get laid."