Hope you guys are still with me. I felt a little inspired and decided to revisit this version of Olitz with their son. If you're new here, be sure to read chapter 1 & 3 to catch up. I changed the narration to third person. Let me know your thoughts!
Lucas Through The Years:
Lucas - age 4
It was tough - being a working parent and raising a child. Sometimes Fitz felt like it was a constant guessing game and he was just lucky to be getting it right so far. Being constantly filled with immense pride and love, while being simultaneously sick and worried every second of every day. Wondering if they feel safe and happy and loved. Making sure they grow up to be well rounded - with autonomy, confidence, kindness. All the good stuff.
And then there was that balance with oneself as a parent. For starters, how do you remain a vivacious human with passions and hobbies and a functioning brain? How do you remain sharp when your first clear thought of the day often happens at 8:30pm under the sprays of the shower, while washing a long day away?
As a first time father, Fitz was still learning the ropes and trying to strike that perfect balance. It's never been quite even on both ends, but Fitzgerald Grant was a devoted man. And he had the most amazing spouse to help him navigate these fun, fulfilling life challenges. Nothing mattered more than his son and his wife. His first priority would always be those two. And one thing that was non-negotiable for Fitz was his quality time with Lucas.
Some days it felt like the kid was growing up too fast. Fitz could hardly believe that he would have a five year old in less than a month. The thought blew his mind. Watching his son grow up was the greatest honor and joy of his life. He didn't want to miss a second of it.
"So how was your week, baby?" Fitz asked his toddler.
This was their typical weekend routine. Fitz made it a point to get up with Lucas every Saturday morning for some bonding time, while Liv slept in.
They occasionally ate sugary cereals (that his wife doesn't approve of), while watching Lucas's favorite cartoons or documentaries. Sometimes they venture out to play at the park, grab breakfast at a local diner, and would return home with fresh flowers, coffee and a pastry to surprise Liv. If it was a rainy or snowy Saturday, they would opt to make hot cocoa and build blanket forts to snuggle and read books together. And other times they simply draw or play with cars while catching up. A proper "Boys Only" hangout. And Fitz always made sure Lucas had his undivided attention during those moments.
Today they were quietly playing with Lucas's train set and figurines in his playroom. Fitz loved this playroom. He can often be found there, roughhousing with Lucas. They were always loud, chaotic and lively. It kept Fitz feeling young and active.
"It was good, Daddy." Lucas answered. "I gotted a star for being on green all the days."
Fitz pretended to be shocked and gasped dramatically. The truth was that Lucas had everyone at his preschool wrapped around his little fingers. Very rarely does he have a bad day. Lucas was popular amongst the staff and he got along with most of his peers. There were no shortage of birthday invites or play dates extended to the Grants as a result.
"That's awesome Lucas!" Fitz ruffled the top of Lucas's head. He had crazy bed hair and his thick, honey blonde curls were especially wild this morning.
At 4 years old, Lucas still hadn't gotten his first big boy haircut yet. Olivia was very sentimental about Lucas's soft curls. They discussed cutting it for Lucas's fifth birthday in a few weeks and Olivia promptly burst into tears at the idea. Fitz quickly dropped the matter, but he teased her mercilessly because he found it to be completely hilarious.
Lucas didn't particularly care though. He rocked his wild curls in style and would often sit for braids or a bun when he wanted his hair away from his face.
"Daddy," Lucas said, "Umm… Sofia and Shiloh was mad at me." He informed. He pressed the button on his remote controller that made his trains speed faster on the track. Fitz quickly removed the police car he'd parked on the track to avoid collision.
"Really? How come?" Fitz asked.
Lucas picked up a Batman Lego figurine and put it on top of the zooming trains. Fitz countered by putting up The Hulk. They both launched their figurines into epic battle, making animated sounds as they strike.
"Because daddy. Sofia said hers my best friend, but Shiloh also said hims my best friend. It's not true. It's not true at all, daddy."
"Oh?" Fitz was genuinely shocked this time. Lucas has been attached at the hips with Shiloh and Sofia since day one at daycare. They have had countless play dates and generally get along quite well with each other. This was news to Fitz.
"I thought you liked them, baby. What changed?" Fitz questioned.
Lucas sighed. "I do like them, daddy." He confirmed. "They are my friends. But not my best friends."
Fitz raised an eyebrow. He was curious about the clear distinction Lucas was making. He probed further. "Then who's your best friend?"
Lucas looked up at his father with a confused look. Almost as if he was offended by the question because the answer was so obvious.
"You are daddy. You're my best friend. " Lucas clarified.
The child's words sunk in and hit Fitz like a ton of bricks. Fitz wasn't expecting to hear that response nor was he prepared for the weight of emotions he would feel once he registered Lucas's remark. His eyes started to water with fresh tears of joy.
"I am?" Fitz asked tearfully.
Lucas nodded, his attention on his toys unfaltering. Nevertheless, he confirmed.
"Yup. You are."
Fitz couldn't stop smiling. He was bursting with happiness. And as much as he tried holding his tears at bay, they came in big drops. He wiped them discreetly as he pulled Lucas onto his lap. He pushed the toddler's hair back and kissed his forehead.
"You're my best friend too, Lucas." Fitz told him.
Lucas smiled, his light blue eyes shimmering. "I know."
Fitz laughed heartily. So it was that clear. He was glad, and couldn't wait to tell everyone who would listen about this moment!
"Thanks for telling me, baby. That makes me so happy." Fitz confessed. "Can I have a smooch?"
They always asked for his consent. And it was okay if the answer was "no". Although, it was usually a resounding "yes" from Lucas.
Lucas wrapped his tiny arms around his dad's neck and dropped his head of curls on Fitz's chest for a tight squeeze. Fitz held on for as long as Lucas would let him, which was all of five seconds before Lucas pulled away and kissed him on the mouth.
Fitz felt his heart swell three sizes. "Thank you, baby! I love you so much."
"Daddy, I'm hungry for pancakes. Can mama get up now?"
Lucas - age 5
Olivia entered her home with a smile after a long day at work. She hung her coat and bag in the closet; hooked her keys on the keyholder and kicked her heels off at the bottom of the stairs.
"Mama's home!" She announced. "Where are my babies?"
"Kitchen!" Fitz shouted.
Olivia followed the mouth-watering aroma of salmon to the kitchen, and there she found her husband at the stove, cooking dinner. And wow, what a sight that was.
She took in her surroundings to make sure that her little mini-me wasn't hiding nearby, waiting to jump out at her in a prank. Once she confirmed the coast was clear, Olivia salivated as she took in her husband's appearance. He was barefoot, but he still had on parts of his suit from the work day. His jacket and tie were gone. He wore his button down untucked from his slacks, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and a few loose buttons at the top. Forty-two had never looked so good on a man.
"Fuck, you're hot!" Olivia uttered.
Her voice was sultry, flirty and it totally made Fitz blush.
Fitz turned around to face his wife with a charmed grin. Decades together has done nothing to dim his infatuation with this woman. He still had a massive crush on his wife, and he could hardly get a hold of himself when she gave him these seductive looks while flirting with him.
Fitz flipped the salmon over and turned the heat down to medium-low. After, he stalked slowly towards Liv who stood behind the kitchen island.
"Speak for yourself." He smirked. "Come here." He pulled her towards him and once she was close enough, he picked her up – eliciting the cutest squeal from her. When Fitz looked into her eyes again, Olivia was beaming back at him.
Her elbows rested against his shoulders as she massaged her fingers through his soft hair.
"Hi husband." Olivia whispered, her lips dangerously close to his.
Fitz licked his lips in anticipation. His eyes flickered back to hers and Olivia felt his lashes brush against her cheek. He grinned.
"Hi baby mama."
Olivia snorted. Whenever he wanted to annoy her, he'd call her that. But over the course of Lucas's life, it had turned into one of their many inside jokes.
"You're an idiot." She scolded playfully.
Fitz leaned in finally and rained the softest and gentlest little kisses on her upper lip. Olivia giggled.
"Your hot idiot." Fitz corrected. "Now kiss me for real. I missed you all day."
Olivia captured his lips in a delicious tango that felt all too consuming and all too familiar. She shivered under his touch and felt butterflies take wing in her stomach. Olivia was obsessed with the feeling of his big hands wandering and gliding over her curves as his tongue rolled inside her mouth. She moaned when he squeezed her ass. Too soon, she was becoming needy and desperate. But the rising smoke from the cast iron pan pulled them apart.
"Baby, the salmon!" Olivia panted.
Without putting her down, Fitz walked back to the stove and checked on the fish. Thankfully it was not burnt. He also checked on the steamed vegetables and they looked ready. He forked a piece of broccoli and bit into half of it.
As he chewed, he leaned in again to steal a quick peck from Olivia's lips.
"Did you eat lunch today?" He asked.
Olivia blinked at him. She couldn't remember a damn thing from her day after he just kissed her.
"Nope." She replied. "Didn't have time."
Fitz rolled his eyes and fed her the rest of the broccoli. She smiled at him as she chewed.
"Yum. I'm so hungry."
"I wonder why." Fitz said sarcastically.
"Put me down. I wanna wash my hands."
Fitz put her down and took a short stroll to the wine cellar. He selected a bottle of Pinot and by the time he came back, Olivia had wine glasses ready on the kitchen island. Fitz uncorked the wine and poured them each a glass.
Olivia took her first sip and moaned in delight. So good.
"Wait, babe, is Maria still here?" Olivia asked, referring to their wonderful nanny.
Fitz shook his head. "I told her to head out early once I got in." He answered.
"Okay. Then where's our little collab?" Olivia asked.
Fitz snorted. One of the joys of being in such a solid partnership was the many inside jokes they shared together. Occasionally, they referred to Lucas as their collab. Especially when he was around and they were talking about him and some surprise they had planned for him.
"Upstairs. I told him he could play or read while I prepared dinner."
Olivia cocked her eyebrows up. "It's so quiet. That doesn't sound suspicious to you?"
Every parent with children knows this undeniable truth: when kids are too quiet, they're up to no good.
They looked at each other and simultaneously shouted : "Lucas!"
Seconds later, Lucas came sprinting down the stairs and into the kitchen. Once he saw Olivia, his face broke into the cutest smile. He rushed over to Olivia, hugging her torso tightly. Like father, like son. The Grant boys were absolutely obsessed with Olivia Pope.
"Hi baby!" Olivia greeted.
She picked him up and peppered his face with kisses. Lucas giggled as he held onto her. Fitz watched them with a look of pure love and adoration.
"How is it possible that you got cuter since I last saw you this morning?" Olivia questioned, tickling Lucas.
Lucas squirmed in her arms as he laughed. "I dunno!"
Olivia kissed his nose once more. "I will launch a full investigation." She joked.
"You always say that, mama!" Lucas giggled.
"I do, don't I?" Olivia laughed. "How was school, papa?"
"It was good." Lucas nodded.
"Yeah? What did you learn?"
"Nothing at all." Lucas responded happily.
This was usually the response they got from Lucas about school. And to think they spent thousands to send him to that school. But they weren't worried because he was doing excellent in Kindergarten as well as all of his extracurriculars.
"Riveting!" Olivia wiggled her eyebrows at him while Fitz chuckled. "Dale a mamá un beso más." Olivia pointed at her cheek.
Lucas goes to an immersion school where they taught the children in English, Spanish, French and Mandarin. He's been steadily learning three languages and both Fitz and Olivia often spoke to him in either Spanish or French sometimes. So does his nanny, Maria.
Lucas leaned in and kissed Oliva's cheek.
"Thank you!" Olivia smiled. "Can you go wash your hands? Daddy made your favorites."
Lucas sniffed the air and tried to peak at the contents on the stove. "You made me salmon, daddy?"
"I sure did." Fitz confirmed.
One of the best things about raising Lucas was his love for food. He was an adventurous eater and would try almost anything. And he absolutely loved salmon. He asked for salmon or chicken nuggets almost every day for dinner.
"Oh daddy. You love me!" Lucas declared.
Both Fitz and Olivia burst into laughter. There truly was never a dull moment with their son around. Olivia was so glad he had such a goofy personality.
Olivia looked at the rice cooker to see how long before it was ready. "Rice is almost done cooking. We're gonna eat in 10 minutes." She told Lucas.
"Okie dokie!" Lucas said.
Olivia put him down and Lucas kissed her hand before rushing to the guest bath on the first floor.
Lucas stood on his little stepping stool and sang the ABC's as he soaped his hands under cold water. Once he was done, he towel dried his hands and walked to a corner in the dining room and faced the wall.
"Mama, tell me when it's five minutes." Lucas said.
"Why?" Olivia asked.
Olivia walked to Lucas in the dining room and found him patiently facing the wall.
"Sweetie. What are you doing?" Olivia chuckled.
Lucas looked up at her innocently. "Putting myself in timeout. I drew on the wall upstairs again." He confessed.
"Lucas." Olivia whined. "Why babe?"
Lucas pouted and shrugged, "I can't help it, mama. I'm an artist!"
Olivia immediately dissolved into laughter. She bent forward on her knees and laughed so hard until Fitz came to see what all the raucous was about. What killed Olivia most was the fact that he put himself in time out in anticipation. Now there's no way she could be mad at him.
"What'd I miss?" Fitz asked, setting plates of broccoli and salmon and condiments at the table.
"Lucas put himself in timeout because he drew on the walls again." Olivia explained.
Fitz chuckled. "Well, that explains why he was so quiet." He said. "Do you want some apple juice with dinner, Lucas?"
Lucas blushed in embarrassment. "Yes please." He answered. Looking between both of his parents, he asked, " Are you mad at me?"
Both Olivia and Fitz shook their heads. This wasn't the first time Lucas drew on the walls and it wouldn't be the last. Sure Olivia would prefer to not have to repaint or scrub her walls every so often but what was she gonna do? No matter how many supplies they bought Lucas to do his drawing, he seemed to prefer a fresh wall as his canvas. Olivia thought that her best solution at this point was to give him a designated wall in the house where he can draw freely. She thought it would be pretty cool to see what drawings fill up the wall over time. And then once it was full, they could repaint it and give him a blank slate again. Who knows, the kid could very well be the Picasso of his generation.
"No baby. Come sit for dinner." Olivia answered.
"Yay!" Lucas smiled. He sat at his seat and patiently waited for his plate of rice and apple juice. As he waited, he sang under his breath, "salmon, salmon, salmon. Yummy in my tummy."
Lucas - age 6
It was spring break and Lucas's parents had taken the whole week off to spend quality time with him. The first half of their vacation was spent at the family vacation house in Aspen. They enjoyed various activities together such as skiing, skating, snowtubing, visiting national forests and parks, going to arcades and eating loads of food. Lucas was absolutely thrilled about all of it. He asked endless questions about the national parks and his parents did their best to keep up with him.
They returned home from their four day excursion to the mountains just in time to attend the birthday party Lucas was invited to by one of his classmates.
Hunter's parents spared no expenses. The party had the making of a child's perfect wishes. A bouncy house, slides, gaming stations, balloons, finger foods, pizza, a pinata and an ice cream birthday cake.
Olivia watched from a distance as her son zoomed across the Callaway's yard. All of the parents were in clusters, having conversations that were mostly about their rugrats and upcoming plans for summer break. Olivia was not your typical PTA mom, but she was cordial and friendly with most of these parents, so for the most part, she was content to just listen and would only interject here and there when prompted.
When she had her fill of small talks with that particular group, she excused herself to get a refill on hard seltzer. As she sipped on her beverage in peace, she watched Fitz run around with Lucas and the other kids. Currently, four kids were ganging up on him on the grass as he pretended to be a zombie out to get them.
While most parents were happy to ignore their kids at social gatherings as they played, Fitz was the exception. He was sort of a big kid himself. He didn't mind chasing after Lucas. He was elated to participate and make memories with his son.
As far as baby daddies and partners go, Olivia couldn't find a flaw in Fitz in that department. He always looked so free and happy to do it all with her and their son. She was so happy to have such a solid person in her corner for this journey of parenthood. And he made her so fucking breathless whenever he was in his element, being a father and husband.
She caught Fitz's eyes and he winked. The moment sent her stomach in a flutter of butterflies. She blushed from her head to her toe. God, she was so fucking in love with that man, it was sickening.
"You put the rest of us to shame." James, her friend and the father of her goddaughter said.
"What do you mean?" Olivia asked.
"The way you look at Fitz." James pointed out. "Half of these women here can't stand their husbands. And then there's you. It's a hell of a thing watching you fall in love with him in real time." He said with a hint of envy.
James was in the middle of a nasty and expensive divorce from his partner, Cyrus. And although the whole ordeal was aching his heart and tearing him completely apart most days, he was still very much a hopeless romantic.
"What's it like?" He asked, "Loving someone so much that you glow when you see them?"
Liv blushed. She didn't realize she looked quite so obvious in her adoration of her husband. But it's not something she could help. Sometimes she still had to remind herself to breathe when Fitz walked up to her, or kissed her, or told her he loved her. Her husband was that guy. And she had a massive crush on him.
"It's breathtaking." Olivia answered. "I've known him all my life and I still have to remind myself to breathe when he walks into a room."
James swooned. "Gosh. I would kill for what you and Fitz have."
Just as Olivia was about to offer some words of comfort, Lucas came running towards her.
"Hi mama!" He said happily.
Lucas was sweating. His hair was sticking to his forehead; his face was red from all the running and his lips were blue from all the candy he's been eating.
"Hi baby!" Olivia greeted him just as excitedly. "Having fun?"
Lucas nodded eagerly, "So much fun!" He replied. "Umm, mama…"
Olivia squatted down to his level and used his shirt to wipe some sweat off his face.
"Yes my love?"
Lucas melted. He loved it when his mom called him that. It always made him feel special. He wrapped his arms around his mom's neck and kissed her forehead. Oliva smiled. Lucas smiled too and continued to pepper more kisses across his mom's face. His crazy hair spilled all over Olivia's face and tickled her skin.
Olivia laughed as she basked in all the love. Her heart swelled in size.
"I'm such a lucky mama!" She exclaimed. "What's all this for?"
Lucas shrugged. "Cause you're my mama and I love you." He said.
Olivia gasped. Her face was threatening to split in half. "Well, thank you babe. I love you too."
"I know, I know." Lucas sang. "Ummm, mama? Can Ella and Hunter and Shiloh come over tomorrow?"
Tomorrow was Sunday and Olivia wanted peace. She was exhausted from this whole school break. And she wanted a day of laziness to decompress and relax. Thankfully for her, Lucas was an easy kid to negotiate with.
"How about next Friday instead? You could have a sleepover."
Lucas nodded excitedly and bounced in place. "Yes! You're the best, mama. Thank you, thank you!"
Just as quickly as he came, he ran off again to his friends to share the good news.
"Lucas, slow down, babe!" Olivia yelled after him. It fell to deaf ears.
Olivia stood up again, only to find James watching her tearfully.
"What?" She questioned.
"Guess what Fitz was doing the entire time you and Lucas were interacting?" James asked.
Olivia shrugged. "I don't know."
"He was watching the two of you. Completely in a trance. Falling in love." James said. "You're so lucky, you know that?"
Olivia offered a small smile. "Fitz and I are not perfect by any means. But I know the man I love. I know what we have. And I don't take a second of it for granted." She said, "Things are shit with Cy right now, but I have faith that one day, you will find the love you deserve."
James pulled her into an unexpected hug. He's been doing a good job of keeping a lid on his emotions. But truth is, he was fucking wrecked. He didn't realize how desperately he needed to hear comfort from a friend like her. He was also grateful that Olivia was letting him hold her. He knew she wasn't a hugger with anyone, except her family. It meant a lot.
No sooner than they let go of each other, Olivia watched as Lucas collided into one of the other kids and they both fell to the ground.
"Sorry Lucas!" Anabella said. "Are you okay?"
The little girl seemed fine. And Olivia thought that Lucas was okay too, until he started screaming. Both her and Fitz ran towards him immediately. Fitz got to him first since he was closest to him.
"Let me see, buddy." Fitz said.
It wasn't bad. He skinned his knee and had a grass splinter. Lucas only started crying when he saw the sight of blood.
"I want mama! I want mama!" He cried.
"I'm right here baby." Olivia sat behind him and kissed his hair. She examined his knee and determined that his injury was minimal. "It's okay, papa. You're gonna be fine."
Lucas shook his head vehemently. Big tears rushed in his eyes as he held onto his mom tightly and hid his face in her chest.
"No mama, not okay!" Lucas took deep breaths, trying to stop himself from panicking. He refused to look at his wound. "It's bleeding! I'm freaking out, mama! Freaking out!"
Hunter's mom brought over a first aid kit. Fitz took it from her.
Olivia kissed Lucas's forehead to comfort him. "Okay papa. I'm sorry. Just don't look at it right now. " She said. "Daddy is gonna clean the cut and put a Band-Aid on for you. Is that okay?"
Lucas nodded hesitantly.
Fitz sanitized his hand and then first took out the splinter with tweezers. Lucas hissed, but otherwise let him pull it out. After, Fitz opened the travel sized bottle of hydrogen peroxide and squirted some in a cotton ball.
"Alright bud, I'm gonna use this to clean the blood, okay?" Fitz informed.
"Will it hurt?" Lucas asked.
"It won't. I promise." Fitz answered.
Feeling secure, Lucas nodded that it was okay. He still shied his face away and held onto his mom tightly.
"Mama hold me!"
Oh the hysterics!
Olivia locked eyes with her husband and they both fought the urge to dissolve into laughter. Fitz winked at her. Their son could be quite entertaining sometimes.
The whole ordeal wrapped up two minutes later. Fitz cleaned the wound, put Neosporin on it and patched him up with a Pokémon band-aid. And after a big smooch on the cheeks from both his parents, Lucas was right as rain. Crisis averted.
In seconds, he was on his feet again, jogging to his friends as if nothing had happened.
Thirty minutes later, happy birthday was sung to Hunter and the cake was cut. Party favors were handed and pretty soon, Lucas was saying a short goodbye to all of his friends. He found his parents when he was ready to go.
During the car ride home, Lucas fell asleep in his booster seat. Olivia glanced at him in the back seat, and then she glanced at her husband in the driver's seat. She felt her stomach flutter again as Fitz ran his palm up and down her thigh.
Olivia played in his hair, caressing the back of his head. She smiled. "Did you hear him earlier?"
Fitz chuckled. "Yeah. 'I'm freaking out mama!' Where does he learn these things?"
Olivia laughed heartily. "I'm so proud of him though. He has excellent self-regulation for his age. Our kid blows me away."
Fitz looked at Lucas, (who was peacefully knocked out) through the rearview mirror. He couldn't contain his smile. His eyes were filled with love for his little boy. He felt overwhelmingly sentimental and fatherly.
"Thank you for birthing such an amazing kid." Fitz grabbed her hand and kissed her fingers one by one. "I love our little life together so much. I love you so much."
Olivia fought back tears. He plucked the words right out of her brain. She leaned over the console and kissed his cheek.
"Ditto."
Lucas - age 9
"For tomorrow. Am I meeting you at the parent/teacher conference or should we try to have dinner earlier and head from there?" Fitz asked as he prepared his morning coffee.
Olivia scratched her forehead with a huff. "Oh sugar! That's tomorrow?"
"Did you forget? Our calendars are literally synced for this very reason." Fitz said, annoyed.
Olivia put a hand up in surrender, not wanting another argument. "I'll make it work. Spare me the lecture."
Lucas's eyes darted back and forth at his parents as they moved about the kitchen and bickered. This was their routine lately. Lucas was noticing how much less they touched. How his mom always rolled her eyes, while his dad looked on with sadness or anger. He noticed how they spoke sarcastically and curtly to each other. This was not normal.
"Did you pay the dogwalker yesterday?"
Fitz groaned. "I'll leave him cash for this afternoon."
Lucas slurped his milk loudly. He didn't like this at all.
"Speaking of the damn dog. Lucas, please feed him before you leave for the bus."
Feeling his appetite ruined, Lucas stood up and called over his golden retriever. "Come Rufus!" He snapped
"What time do you think you'll be home for dinner?" Fitz asked.
"I should be home by 6." Olivia replied.
Lucas filled the dog's bowl and ducked upstairs to his room to retrieve his tablet. He scrolled on FaceTime until he found the number he was looking for. He placed a call.
"Uncle Huck, hi. I seriously need your help, man."
"Maria, ¡me voy a mi cuarto!"
Lucas burst through the doors from piano lessons and raced to his room to lay down. He's had an awful day. He found his classes to be boring as usual and lunch was extra gross. Sofia was annoying, recess was way too short and he had a terrible headache that wouldn't go away. After school, he went to his programs, completed his schoolwork, and participated in various activities until his nanny picked him up for piano lessons. He was learning Bach, which he completely sucked at, but his dad insisted he continue trying, despite making it known that he hated the instrument.
As soon as Lucas got in his room, he closed the door and lunged on his bed for his tablet. He texted Huck.
Did you set it up, Huck?
Minutes went by before he saw three little bubbles flashing on the screen. Then a simple thumbs up emoji came through.
Lucas turned on his back and looked up at the ceiling in relief. "What a day." He mumbled to himself.
Seconds later, he heard scratches at his door and Rufus crying for him. He got up and let the dog in. Rufus immediately jumped on his bed and laid on top of him, his tail wagging as he licked Lucas's face.
Lucas kissed Rufus's head and scratched behind his ears. Rufus's tail went crazier. "Hi Wuff! Hi boy. I missed you."
Lucas got up a few minutes later to go find snacks downstairs. He politely asked Maria to make him a mini charcuterie board consisting of cheese, crackers, fruits and veggies with dip. As he ate his snacks, he drew in his sketchpad. His hand moved fast as he darted his tongue out. He spent over an hour perfecting his drawing – defining lines, shading, erasing, ripping pages, restarting.
Soon enough his parents were home and Lucas found himself on pins and needles. They succeeded in placing an order out for Thai food without bickering too much. However his mom was still on her phone working, and his dad was parked in front of the TV pretending to care about sports highlights. No one was talking. Somehow their silence and indifference with each other drove him crazier than their bickering.
The bell rang twenty minutes later and Lucas sprung to his feet, hoping it was Huck. When he opened the door, he saw Huck and their food in his hands. Lucas smiled big.
"Huck?" Olivia said, surprised. "What are you doing here?"
Huck shrugged. "Uh, I brought dinner. And I'm gonna spend time with Lucas. He called me."
Olivia darted her eyes at her son. "Care to explain, sweet child of mine?"
"Sofia Cho's parents are getting a divorce. Did you know that?" Lucas started.
Fitz heard and walked to the foyer where this discussion was taking place. Olivia shook her head at Lucas.
"I didn't know. That's too bad, honey."
"She said before the divorce, all her parents did was fight, yell and be mean." Lucas explained, hands hanging on his hips. "All you and daddy do now is: fight and snark and huff. And guess what? It's getting on my nerves. I get headaches at school. I don't want to become like Sofia. She is an astronomical pain in the ass these days."
"Language Lucas Elias!" Both Fitz and Olivia scolded. Olivia's outrage was louder though.
"Sorry. But she really is, Ma!" Lucas argued. "She's in therapy. She's now bullying people at school because she's sad and angry. She cries all the time. She's a category one mess!" He heaved out a long, frustrated sigh.
Olivia couldn't believe her ears. How did she birth such a smart kid? And when the hell did he get so perceptive? As he stood in front of her right now, he looked a little bit older and taller. And it wrecked her. Her kid was growing up. He had a mind of his own and he knew how to speak his feelings. Which was a far cry from hers and Fitz's ability these days.
Even with the pressure of three pairs of eyes on him, Lucas urged himself to continue being brave as he laid out his plans. "So here's my plan: me and uncle Huck are going to hang out here, and you two are going out to dinner. Where are they going to dinner, uncle Huck?"
"Reservations at Babbo for 7:30. A car will be here soon." Huck said awkwardly.
Fitz and Olivia glanced at each other, jaws to the floor.
"You did all this?" Fitz asked.
"Of course." Lucas answered proudly.
"Why?" Olivia asked.
"Being a child of divorce sounds like it sucks. I will not be a child of divorce." Lucas said simply.
Fitz and Olivia's eyes met again and it became alarmingly clear to them that they couldn't go on as they've been. They needed to have a serious talk.
"Okay." Olivia simply nodded. She fought back tears as she waved Lucas into her arms. "I hear you. Come here."
Lucas walked into her arms and let his mom hold him for a few seconds. Olivia squeezed extra tight and kissed his forehead repeatedly while whispering a million "I'm sorrys".
After a few beats, Lucas squirmed away. "You're gonna be late." He said. "You guys should get ready."
Fitz and Olivia got ready next to each other in their "his and hers" bathroom ensuite. The room was charged with an unusual tension. Olivia passed by Fitz and he closed his eyes as he caught a whiff of her fragrance. Fitz felt his heart ache. His eyes followed her movements as she stepped into her heels and curled the straps of her red dress over her shoulders. Fitz watched as she stubbornly tried to zip by herself, when in previous days, he was usually the one zipping her up while he teased her neck and shoulders with kisses.
"Let me."
Olivia shivered at the sound of his low baritone behind her ears. She felt his tall presence embracing her and all she wanted to do was press her body against his and melt into him. But instead she stood still and mumbled a soft "Okay."
She didn't breathe the entire time his fingers ghosted along her spine as he zipped her up. She felt his warm breath against her neck and it sent a chill to her womb. Tears of nostalgia burned behind her eyes. He hasn't touched her in weeks. They don't even sleep in the same bed anymore.
How the hell did they get here?
Fitz lingered. Even after he finished zipping her up, he kept feeling that magnetic pull towards her. His body ached to be near her. He missed his wife.
She turned to face him after a few seconds and he had to remind himself to breathe as they stared into each other's eyes. Olivia Pope was still the most beautiful woman he's ever met in his life.
"You look…"
Sensational. Breathtaking. Gorgeous.
He fumbled through the words. And he hoped she could read his mind still.
"Thank you." Olivia nodded. "We should go before we miss the reservation."
Finally Fitz breathed again. "Right." He said. He walked over to the bed and grabbed his jacket. He threw it over his shoulders and fixed the collar. "Ready if you are."
The ride to the restaurant quiet. Olivia was looked out of the window and let her mind wonder. She still loved her husband. That much, she was absolutely sure of. She didn't think they were at the point of divorce. But she felt so lost and disconnected from Fitz. She couldn't pinpoint when it happened. The last six months of their lives has been a rollercoaster of changes.
After finishing his second term as governor, Fitz made the decision to resign. Olivia fully supported his wishes. Without the daily stressors of his previous role, he had a lot more free time on his hands. When he made the decision to not renew his governorship, he had a silly fantasy about going on more trips, getting better at golf, mending his strained relationship with his own father, creating more memories with his son, and romancing his wife. His new reality, however, proved to be suffocating. He felt stuck in his soul searching journey. And that quickly sent him into a downward spiral that led to depression. At his wit's end, he accepted a teaching position at Columbia University to fill his time and try to figure out what's next for himself.
Around the same time, great opportunities were knocking on Olivia's door, and she really wanted to explore them. She was approached about running a campaign for a democratic senate candidate. They discussed it at length together and knew that it would be a difficult few months until the selection. Olivia was hesitant. She didn't want to put anything above their family and relationship. There would be lots of really long days, scheduled travels, and a million other things that would need her focus. Even with all of these logistical obstacles, Fitz happily cheered his wife on. He made her believe they could shoulder the challenge together and she trusted him.
But somewhere along the way, they stopped communicating effectively. Things just kept happening, and before they knew it, they were canceling on one-too-many date nights. Their schedules clashed. Minor oversights easily turned into petty arguments. They saw a lot less of each other throughout the days. When she came home most evenings, horny and restless, he was too tired to indulge her. When he wanted her, she was often too busy; or too wired to relax and orgasm. This put a damper on their sex life and overtime, Fitz just stopped initiating. Then one day, Fitz woke up in the guest bedroom and sadness hit him. He hadn't talked, kissed, touched, smiled or fucked his wife in over two months.
Now they are here. So far over the edge that they had to be parent-trapped by their 9 year old son. It was ridiculous.
Upon arrival at Babbo's, they checked in their coats at the desk and were promptly seated at a table for two in a private section of the room. Fitz pulled out her seat and helped her into her chair. When their waiter came to greet them, he let Olivia take the lead on a bottle of wine. And even though they've been here multiple times before, they studied the menu with precision until their waiter returned to take their orders.
"How's the wine?" Fitz asked.
The silence was beginning to feel unbearable.
"It's fine. Good." Olivia answered.
Fitz scratched his brows. He was not one for small talks. He hated that the person who knew him the most was unable to have a meaningful conversation with him.
"Do you want a divorce?" He blurted.
Olivia glared at him in shock. Immediately, tears started to pool behind her eyes as if he'd slapped her.
"Take that back." She demanded in a strangely calm, yet menacing voice.
Fitz swallowed the lump in his throat. He was instantly remorseful. "Liv-"
She didn't wait for him to finish. She exploded; her anger getting the best of her. She was so fucking scared that she was shaking. Why would he even ask that? They had skipped so many steps above divorce. Was that what he wanted?
"Why the fuck would you ask me that?" Olivia asked angrily. "I don't know, Fitz. Do you want a fucking a divorce?"
With the words thrown back at him, Fitz felt a sense of panic. "Of course I don't want a fucking divorce!" He answered in a hushed whisper. "But it doesn't feel like we have much of a marriage these days. What do you want me to do?"
"I want you to fight!" Olivia implored, her brows tightening into a frown. "For me, for us-"
The return of their waiter momentarily cut their argument short. They sat in silent discomfort as the waiter placed down Fitz's grilled octopus and Olivia's radicchio salad, which consisted of ricotta, juicy heirloom tomatoes, pear, candied nuts and a light cranberry balsamic dressing.
Once the waiter was gone, Olivia dropped her napkin cloth and pushed her chair back. "Excuse me." She got up and walked away, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.
Fitz watched her maneuver to the ladies room while he sat in his seat feeling anxious and upset. He drained his glass of wine and decided to head towards the bathroom. He waited for Olivia to come out. After about five minutes, she walked out and found him leaning against the opposite wall. She looked annoyed with him all over again, but her resolve faltered the moment he pulled her into his arms and silently hugged her. She stood stoic for a second, but then he wrapped his arms tightly around her and Olivia felt her knees go weak. Slowly, she wrapped her arms around him and held him too.
It was the first time they held each other in months.
"I'm sorry. I was wrong." Fitz whispered softly. "We got off on the wrong foot. Please, c-can we try that again? Divorce is not an option."
Olivia pulled out of his arms and looked into his eyes. He looked so handsome and tired and terrified. All she wanted to do was kiss him. But she didn't know if they were there yet.
"I'm sorry too." She offered.
She grabbed his hand and led the way back to their table. Once they were back to their table, Fitz moved her chair and place setting next to him instead of across from him. They didn't need any more space between them. These last few weeks gave them enough to last a lifetime.
Fitz refilled their wine and then they both picked up their fork to start their meal. Olivia ate her salad, it was delightful. Fitz ate his grilled octopus, it was cold, but delicious nonetheless. Their waiter dropped in to check on them, and they ordered more food. In between the wait, they talked about their day without sarcasm. It was so nice to be able to genuinely connect with each other again.
"Okay. But can we acknowledge the fact that our son parent-trapped us tonight, and we were none the wiser?" Olivia laughed.
Fitz pinched his eyes shut in embarrassment as he shook his head. "He was so dead serious too." He chuckled. "But honestly, I'm so fucking impressed. I forget he's not so little anymore. And how smart he is."
"He's definitely our kid." Olivia mused. "But in this situation, he was all you. Him calling his best friend an astronomical pain the ass… all you."
Fitz laughed. "Guilty, your honor."
"But he's right, you know?" Olivia said bittersweetly.
The mood grew solemn again.
"We haven't been a team for a while. I get the sense that you resent me for something but I don't know what it is. And we keep drifting apart. I'm scared, I'm upset and I'm sad."
Fitz searched for her eyes. He was glad they were finally putting words to how they were feeling. It was a good start.
"Are you upset with me?"
"Yes." Olivia answered. "I'm upset with myself too. Because our son shouldn't have to intervene to get us to sit down and talk. He said we get on his nerves. He's nine, Fitz."
The words pierced Fitz's heart like a bullet and he felt like shit.
"Fuck. I know, I know." He reached for Olivia's hands and held onto them like a lifeline. He bowed his head in shame. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He brought her hands to his lips and worshiped them with kisses and tears of sorrow. "Will you forgive me?"
Olivia felt like someone reached inside her chest and twisted her heart. It hurt her fucking soul to see him like that. They've spent so much time bickering and disappointing each other lately, that she failed to see the signs that were right in front of her this whole time. He was hurting. No, it was beyond that. He was depressed. And that absolutely shattered her.
"There's nothing to forgive, my love." She said softly.
Fitz sniffled. "Okay. Okay. But how do we fix us, Liv? We're barely above water right now."
Olivia squeezed his hand. "Baby. Look at me." She pleaded.
Fitz gazed up at her, his blue orbs glowing through the well behind them. She hasn't called him baby in a while either. As he stared at her, all the things he thought he'd forgotten about her, came rushing back at him. Like how gorgeous she looked in red. Like how much more breathtaking she was when she wore her hair up, and a few tendrils were allowed to flirt with her neck. Like how her lips looked when she used lip liner and gloss - juicy and seductive. And finally her eyes. How wonderfully her long, curly lashes framed them. How he felt whole, whenever her love for him seeped through them.
He exhaled sharply. Unable to contain them, the words spilled from his mouth. "God. I fucking miss you so much."
Fresh tears streamed down Olivia's face at his words. She had been doing so well up until that point. She gently caressed Fitz's cheeks with her palm, and then crushed her lips into his a split second later. They both gasped; echoes of painful sobs escaping their throats. She pressed against his upper lip, challenging him to kiss her like he used to. He responded in kind; grasping her face, and drawing her closer to him. The kiss gradually intensified. The gravity of their lips sliding against each other felt incredibly sweet and heavenly as their tongues reacquainted. He breathed her in deeply. Lingering in between every moment. Kissing her so tenderly and lovingly until they both felt depleted of oxygen.
Olivia gulped, trying to catch her breath. "I'm still here." She whispered. "I'm still in love with you. I'm still committed to our vows. Tell me that's still true for you too?"
Fitz nodded. "That will always be true." He replied.
Olivia's cheeks rose into a soft smile. "Then we're not that far from above water." She told him. She glided her fingers through his soft curls, scratching the back of his neck the way he likes. "We fix this by listening to each other again. Talk to your wife."
Fitz leaned in and kissed her lips again. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers and looked into her eyes.
"Okay. Let's talk." He said.