'''Beastly Bart''' also known as "Urban recreational grounds of the Southern Hemisphere" (South park for the not so Grandiloquent.)
Studying for Care of Magical creatures class. Bart wants to pretend he already encountered a full book full of magical creatures and monsters so he no longer has to do the class and gets a free hour to goof off in school. So he plots to do so by making up fake cryptides/mythical creatures with help from Oscar and Stan from South Park.
However the creatures are real and very dangerous! Meanwhile Rob Reiner causes trouble when Oscar is caught smoking at school. Rob Reiner wants to ruin the evil tobacco industry while at the same time promoting obesity and fast food.
== Plot ==
The chalkboard gag is "I will not flip the classroom upside down." Bart is upside down on the classroom ceiling or should that be floor? Of an upside down classroom. He runs out and skateboards home.
The couch gag is the Simpsons sitting down normally but a TiVo menu pops up asking the view if the want to delete this recording of a Simpsons episode. The possible viewer selects yes.
The Simpsons are watching TV. Bart is lying down on the couch taking up room so Hugo and Oscar have to sit on the floor.
"Next on Fox tonight. Carmen Electra stars in Boobs!" said the voice over.
"Oooooooh!" said Homer aroused. Marge growls angrily at him.
"Mmmmmmmmmm!" Oscar drools.
"A movie about a class of remedial reading students and their teacher who wants to be taken seriously." said the voice over.
"Awwwww! I wanted it to be about boobs..." said Homer.
"Homer!" Marge scolds him for being unfaithful.
"But tonight on Jock Centre! A slugger on Steroids?" said the voiceover. There was a baseball player with grotesquely enlarged arms. "Tiger woods annoyed?" A bird lands on Tiger Woods' head. "North Korean missiles deployed?" Kim Jong Il fires some nuclear missiles.
"Aaaaaaaaaagh! We're doomed!" Oscar screamed.
"Oscar! It's just a light hearted sports programme! North Korea is not attacking!" said Marge. "Now sit down..."
"But for now here is a montage of bizarre and unfortunate events involving famous baseball players!" said the voice over.
The song We're talking softball! played while showing amusing and sometimes tragic clips of baseball players suffering maladies. Ken Griffin suffered gigantism after drinking too much Nerve Tonic. He is in a wheelchair with a swollen head, arms and legs.
"Gigantism? Cooooool! Mwuhahahaha!" Hugo laughs evilly.
Steve Sax was pulled over by Springfield's police and when he explained he was from New York they thought he was a mass murderer on the run from the law and arrested him. He ended up serving six consecutive life sentences.
Another baseball player was very sick in hospital with acute radiation poisoning.
Yet another was hospitalised after getting into a fight with evil blond Barney over British Prime ministers.
"Pitt the elder!" said Wade Boggs.
"Lord Palmerston!" Evil Barney yelled.
"Pitt the elder!"
"Lord Palmerston!"
"I was at Moe's that night said Homer.
"Oh you poor thing! We're you alright sweetie?" Marge was concerned for Homer around Evil Barney.
"Yeah. Barney's evil cousin was more occupied with beating up anyone who said Pitt the Elder." said Homer.
Roger Clements was hypnotised into thinking he was a chicken.
Clements acting like a chicken and squawking and clucking.
Oscar laughed hysterically.
"And who could forget poor Ozzie Smith who disappeared off the face of the Earth after visiting the Springfield mystery spot..." said the voice over.
"Aaaaaaaaagh!" screamed Ozzie Smith as he plunged down a red void. He sees the text E=MC2 (with a small superscript 2 for squared) "cool!" He takes a photo of it with a camera before continuing to scream. He was never seen ever again...
Marge checked the time and gasped. "Oh Lord! Kids you promised you'd start your Care of magical creatures homework an hour ago!"
"Awwwww! Mom do we have to?" Bart whined.
"Yes! And turn that frown upside down! It's a fun subject! You get to pet and feed all the cute funny little magical creatures!" said Marge.
"Mom I hate cute. That's why I don't like the class..." said Bart. "And most of the creatures we learn about are not cute! They're vicious diabolical beasts!" Bart explained making a beastly look. "Why last week we had to clean out the Fire crab hutches without getting burnt by them!"
"Hmmmm..." Marge sighed.
...
Bart eventually did as he was told and went up to his room to study Gnomes and why they are used as pest control to remove horklumps but end up being pests themselves.
Bart remembers when Skinner announced at assembly their old Care of a Magical creatures was retiring.
"And in further news, our care of magical creatures tutor Professor Kettleburn is retiring to spend time with his remaining limbs." said Skinner.
Bart laughed hysterically.
The day dream ended as Bart put on his TV to pass the time while he did his homework on gnomes.
"And now on Fox. Carmen Electra in Boobs. A movie about a class of remedial readers and their teacher who wants to be taken seriously." said a voice over. The movie began.
Some time later Carmen Electra's character was teaching a class of severely disabled people to read. Some had helmets on, others were strapped into wheelchairs. There were also Canadians, a girl who couldn't remember how she ended up in the class apart from waking up there after falling of a school slide and an arsonist who kept slapping the other students.
"I burn things!" said the arsonist.
Bart shivered in fear and got down to doing his homework.
A handicapped student had passed up a reading level.
"Now I'm a Gene-ass!" (genius) said the student.
"More like jackass!" said a young man with Down syndrome.
Oscar laughed at his quick wit. "Hehehe! Jackass..."
Bart sighed as he did his homework.
Lisa was in her room doing her homework and in deep thought solving maths equations.
Hugo was in the attic doing his homework. He retreats there despite that he doesn't have to be there.
"Sharing with a Bart has its own problems..." said Hugo.
Downstairs Abe annoyed Homer.
"I want to see cops beat up hippies!"
"Dad! Enough of that fascism! Mom liked riding in the Mystery Machine from Scooby Doo and having men with long hair as friends! And listening to um Bob Hope." said Homer.
"Oooooh! You're not too big for me to tan your hide!" said Abe.
...
Meanwhile downstairs Homer was watching the sports.
Lisa was first downstairs with finished homework. "Done!"
"Shhhhh!" Homer hushed her because he missed what a commentator said.
"Homer!" Marge told him off. "Well done Sweetie!" She praised Lisa.
"And here is a video from Rob Reiner all the way in Los Angeles! You're live on air Rob!" said the commentator.
"Hi I'm Rob Reiner! (He is eating a chicken drumstick) You May know me as the director of When Harry Met Sally." said Rob Reiner still eating a very large chicken drumstick.
"Aaaaaaagh!" The kids screamed.
"Ow! Not so loud!" Homer yelled. "What is your problem with Rob Reiner?"
"Dad I take it Oscar hasn't had his odd friends from Colorado over..." said Lisa.
"Rob Reiner is pure evil!" said Oscar. "He has done nothing but cause trouble for South Park! And now he's here!"
"He's in Los Angeles..." said Homer.
"I'm coming over to see you Springfield!" said Rob Reiner.
Oscar screamed and ran away.
"What's his problem?" Homer asked.
Bart rolled his eyes at Homer's stupidity and forgetfulness.
...
Oscar went to his room and rang his friends Stan and Kyle in South Park. "Stan you are not gonna believe this! Rob Reiner is trying to come to Springfield!"
"Oh geez! Okay sit tight! We're coming over." said Stan.
"Okay but don't bring Cartman..." said Oscar.
"Oz, I'm sorry but he will follow us regardless of what we say or do!" said Stan.
"I don't want that racist fat turd anywhere near here or my buddy Kyle! Just dump him already! Why won't you?" said Oscar.
"We try but he always persuades everyone to keep playing with him. Probably because he has the latest console or invents the latest fad or Role Play..." said Stan. "You should be happy that we excluded him from Coon and friends for scratching Mintberry Crunch and summoning Cthulhu. He was so mad when we told him he was no longer in his own game!"
Oscar smirked. "Yeah that was funny. Unfortunately some of the minor characters are really dumb and let him form the new Coon and Friends and exile you..."
"True but we have the Freedom pals now they're much better with a base in Token's mansion!" said Stan.
"It would be cooler if you and Kenny would just cut ties with Cartman already! I refuse to allow a racist in our gang!" said Oscar.
"Okay fine! See ya!" said Stan.
...
The next day at care of magical creatures lessons Bart and rest of fourth grade at Springwarts were learning how two throw gnomes to get rid of them.
Bart enjoyed this. It was especially amusing when he threw a gnome at Skinner's car.
"Simpson!" Skinner yelled.
However a class/lesson was still a lesson no matter how interesting it was. Bart did not want to attend. He overheard from the teacher saying that if any of the students could fill up their monster guide to monsters and other magical creatures he would personally graduate them from the class so they no longer had to attend.
Bart had a plan, what if he just made up creatures.
"Yes... that South Park place Oscar always goes to... they're full of cryptids... Mwuhahahaha!" Bart laughed deviously as he put his plan into motion.
Much to his delight Oscar wanted to be part of the plan. He personally offered to guide Bart.
However in South Park, Colorado, the Gang of Four had more important things to do than hunt mythical creatures. Namely dealing with a crazy celebrity or PC Principal's antics.
"Sorry guys but we're trying to do a Member Berries episode here!" said Stan as the gang met Oscar and Bart at a Member Berry farm.
"Oh member chewbacca?" asked a member berry
"Oh I member!" said another.
Oscar started eating the member berries until Randy told him off for eating the produce.
"Hey! Stop eating the produce!" yelled Randy.
"Guys we won't stop your little monster hunt. But don't interrupt the episode!" said Stan.
"And don't eat the member berries... why would you?!" Kyle asked.
"Cos they're berries! They're food!" said Oscar.
"Come on Oz, lets go..." said Bart.
...
Bart and Oscar went into the forest, National Park. They were looking for their first creature, the Mexican staring frog of southern Sri Lanka.
"That... doesn't make sense. Sri Lanka is in Asia and Mexico is in North America..." said Bart. "And I don't like geography that much."
"Blame Cartman for naming it. He's a right idiot..." said Oscar. He was setting up recording equipment. "Now we have to wear these blindfolds because the Mexican staring frog can kill if you look directly at it." They put blindfolds on.
Suddenly a seemingly rubber frog with goggly eyes on a fishing rod was hopping about while Cartman made stupid noises because he wanted the Mexican staring frog to talk.
"Rrrrrrr! Ribbit ree! I am the Mexican staring frog of Southern Sri Lanka! Beware! Beware!" said Cartman.
"Cartman shut up! The Mexican staring frog can't talk! That would be ridiculous! Now keep quiet while you do the recording again..." Stan ranted.
"No you do it!" Cartman yelled.
"Just shut up and get behind the rock fat ass!" Kyle yelled.
"Do it yourself hippy!" yelled Cartman.
Bart and Oscar rolled their eyes as Kyle and Cartman argued.
"Are they always like this..." Bart sighed.
"Yep..." said Oscar.
...
Then Hugo was a bear, for some reason. Curtesy of my co author responsible for the Homer clones in [[The End! Or is it?]].
Bear Hugo roared.
Oscar using his magic wand gave bear Hugo a big wet shiny black nose so he was a cartoon bear.
Bear Hugo looked confused.
Oscar gurgled like a baby and honked his nose.
"Oh what next! Posh Hugo?" Homer asked.
Alvin the executive producer was about to speak.
"ALVIIIIIIIN!" Oscar yelled like Dave the human from Alvin and the chipmunks.
== Plot 2 ==
Meanwhile Homer was watching the sports channel. The football commissioner would potentially visit a town in America to finalise the addiction of a new football team.
"Meh... the only thing our town is good at is its record of heart attacks..." Lisa sighed.
Somewhere in town Hans Moleman clutched his chest in pain and collapsed from a heart attack. Nelson laughed. "Ha! Ack!" But suddenly succumbed to a heart attack.
"Well I will personally bring the football commissioner here by creating my own football team!" said Homer.
The family except Bart and Oscar who were in South Park at the moment, laughed at Homer.
"What? I'm serious!" said Homer.
"Dad you couldn't even coach Bart's football team without screwing it up for him and annoying him by cutting everyone..." said Lisa.
"I mean it this time! I'm gonna read books and study hard on how to run a football team!" said Homer.
Everyone laughed.
"(Wiping his tears from laughter) Dad you're not exactly known for being studious. And creating a football team is a lot of hard work!" said Hugo before laughing again.
"Shut up! I don't need you lot laughing at me! I'm going to Moe's!" Homer stormed off as they laughed at him.
"Bald Mommy is sure to fail!" said Maggie in baby gibberish as subtitles came up to translate her babbling.
...
In the basement were pinball and bowling sounds and audio from a horror film of creepy child voices singing "Ring o ring o roses..." in an eerie tone as ominous music played.
"Homer you've been in the basement all week making odd noises! What have you been doing?" Marge asked him.
"Playing a bit of pinball, some bowling... watched the Shining..." said Homer.
"How were you able to do that down here?! We don't even have a bowling alley..." said Marge.
"Details... details honey... now I have to get back to my project so please leave me in peace..." said Homer asking her to leave him to work on his football team.
"Hmmmmm!" Marge sighed wondering how he was making all those noises.
She went to start on the washing but Hugo was in a feral mood and was running about on all fours like a dog. Also he was naked.
"Hugo Victor Simpson! Put your clothes back on!" Marge scolded him.
Hugo reluctantly put his clothes back on.
Marge sighed as she did the laundry.
In the basement Homer was designing the kit for his football team.
He scribbled out an idea he wasn't happy with.
...
In South Park.
"I wonder what's happening at home." Bart asked Oscar as they were staking out for sightings of Scuzzlebutt.
We cut to a giant Ken Griffey Jr stomping about Springfield terrorising it and smashing up buildings and fighting with Godzilla.
"Uh no!" Bart thought that scene was extremely stupid.
Suddenly a bush rustled. (And so did Oscar's jimmies)
"Shhhh!" Oscar hushed Bart.
Scuzzlebutt emerged from the bushes. He was a large beastly creature with horns and Patrick Duffy as his leg. He was holding a stick of celery.
Scuzzlebutt muttered and grunted as he scratched himself from an itch.
Bart silently recorded him.
...
Meanwhile Rob Reiner was busy submitting a tape slandering Springfield to dash their chances of getting Homer's team, the Springfield Atoms made an official team.
"Los Angeles is Home to Hollywood's biggest stars." said Rob Reiner driving his car on the red carpet and running over guests while eating a big greasy burger. "Springfield collects other people's garbage..."
Mayor Quimby held up a sign welcoming a garbage boat into the town docks.
Rob Reiner was sticking his name over the Hollywood stars on Hollywood road.
"But don't take my word for it. Some famous stars have signed wavers to allow impersonators of themselves to sing this song." said Rob Reiner.
In a recording studio Jar Jar Binks, Prince, Michael Jackson, Freddy Krueger and Quickdraw McGraw from a Hannah Barbera cartoon were singing Springfield sucks!
However the football commissioners hated Los Angeles and were mostly Springfield citizens anyway so were incredibly biased for Springfield.
"Darn that Los Angeles!" said Rich Texan. "And their Brangelina and that foul mouthed Sarah Silverman!"
"I didn't murder my husband to take over his seat at the football commission to let Los Angeles win!" said a blonde woman.
"Then it's settled! Springfield wins the newcomer of the year award and Homer's team gets to join the league!" said Rich Texan. "Yes haw!" He shot the ceiling with his guns.
Everyone was speechless he did that.
"And now I must go home and tell my now gay grandson I still love him." said Rich Texan.
We cut to fourth grade, Krabappel's class. A boy dressed as a cowboy with a Stetson hat on was giving the bedroom eyes look to Oscar and leaning over to his desk.
"Eeeeew! No! You are not my type!" said Oscar.
"You're my type... hehehe..." said the little cowboy kid.
"Avery Texan stop freaking out your class mates..." Mrs Krabappel sighed.
...
Homer was delighted by the news.
"Woohoo!" Homer cheered. "Marge get out the champagne!"
In canon Grampa kidnaps the commissioner and everyone hates him for ruining the town's chances to have an official football team in the league but that doesn't happen here.
"I want an episode..." Grampa whined.
"You're not screwing things up by being an obnoxious old coot!" said Homer. "Now where has Bart and Oscar got to?" Homer asked.
In South Park at Raisins Oscar and Bart are researching South Park Cryptids to add to their books of seen creatures. While eating boxes of chicken wings and typical fast food.
"Let's see... Visitors..." said Bart.
"Grey alien ripoff." Oscar replied.
"Jakovasaurs." said Bart.
"Hermaphrodite Jar Jar Binkses." said Oscar.
"Succubus."
"Sexy vampires." said Oscar.
"Oz, stop." said Bart. "Crab people."
Oscar had nothing witty to say.
"Fighting Oysters." said Bart.
Oscar laughed.
"Mutant turkeys." said Bart.
"Giant killer Guinea Pigs." said Bart.
"Awwwwwwwww! Guinea piggies!" Oscar squealed.
Bart sighed. "And underpants gnomes." He shut his exercise book. "That just leaves one more monster... the big black scary monster." On Bart's laptop was a four legged crab like monster with two long claws and a flapping Canadian head and red eyes.
"Hey guys, whattya looking up now..." Stan asked.
"We're gonna find the big black scary monster." Oscar explained.
Stan spat out his soda. "You what?!" He gasped. "Guys no you can't be serious!"
"We are serious..." said Oscar.
"Guys no! That monster is far too dangerous! It eats anyone it comes across!" Stan explained.
"So we can't get footage of it..." said Oscar.
"No! You were risking your lives wanting genuine footage of a succubus! This is suicide!" said Stan.
"Well I suppose that's that then." Bart sighed.
"Also it's voiced by Henry Winkler. Fonzie from Happy Days." said Stan.
"Eeeeeugh!" said Bart and Oscar.
But they decided to investigate the big black scary monster anyway.
"I'm sure, knowing South Park that it's name is a racist joke..." said Bart.
Oscar hushed him as they were staking out, outside the big black scary monster's cave.
The four legged insectoid monster was inside it's cave watching Happy Days.
''Monday, Tuesday Happy Days! Thursday Friday, Happy Days!''
Bart and Oscar sweat dropped.
The monster was very happy when Fonzie appeared on screen.
However the two boys were in serious trouble.
"Bartholomew!" Marge yelled followed by Homer and Stan Marsh.
"I'm sorry guys but I couldn't let you risk your necks..." said Stan Marsh.
"Bart you are in so much trouble when we get home!" Marge yelled. "And Oscar, you know your strange friends from Colorado must have warned about... what are you looking for again?"
"The big black scary monster of South Park, Colorado... or Fonzie as a black four legged crab monster with an unfortunate and possibly racist name." said Oscar.
"Oz everything in South Park is racist..." said Stan. "And yes I warned you the monster in that cave is extremely dangerous. It's very stupid for you to want to go and see it. Just go home..."
"Fine... my hands are cold anyway. Why is it always winter here...!"
But that wouldn't be the lat time Oscar got in trouble...
...
Some time after Bart's grounding.
Bart decided to play it safe and only monster hunt in Springfield. They found in the woods Bigfoot, who turned out to be Homer after falling in some mud again.
Bart grimaced and sighed as they left muddy Homer to yell gibberish and scare tourists.
Next they found Lisa meditating in the flowers and found some very odd looking rabbits/hares.
"Those are not rabbits Oz... they're jackelopes." said Bart. A jackelope is a rabbit or hare with antlers.
"I don't say rabbits. I say bunnies! Awww! Bunny wunny!" said Oscar.
Bart was mortified Oscar used the word Bunny for rabbit like a kindergartener. And that found them cute.
At the Kwik e mart for a pit stop and a squishee. Oscar was reading Bart's Guide to life on the section he detailed legendary creatures. He drew a Star Trek humanoid alien and labelled it the Thing. "Bart..."
"What is it."
"That's not what the thing looks like..." said Oscar.
"Oh yeah?" Bart sneered.
"Yeah! This is John Carpenter's the Thing..." he showed something on his Mypad.
Bart screamed horribly at something.
Oscar was in deep trouble.
"You showed Bart a gory clip of an R rated movie?!" Marge for once was mad with Oscar.
"He wanted to see what the Thing looked like because he drew it as a Star Trek alien...
Bart was traumatised.
"Boys go out and play but no watching R rated movies Oscar..." Marge sighed.
"Oz what where those red tentacles..." Bart asked.
"Um... transmogrified or mutated human meat or even alien meat..." said Oscar.
They then in a prairie near Jurkle's grandparents house encounter some ape like creatures that resemble prehistoric Patrick Star. In that they had his teeth and a gorilla like build. Simian Segue was playing for some reason.
Jurkle got out his violin to play in peace in the nature and countryside.
"No Jurkle don't!" Oscar warned pointing to his Mypad that explained these ape like creatures the lesser spotted Fafoons were extremely violent when angered. And one thing that angered them was bad violin playing...
Jurkle glared at Oscar and insisted on playing his violin. He played Simian Segue badly with loud violin screeches. This upset the apes who reacted violently by charging at him with fierce angry looks on their faces.
Jurkle screamed and ran off chased by the apes.
Oscar sighed.
...
Abe wanted to stay home alone as in canon so he'd in his kooky zany forgetfulness try to kidnap the football commissioner.
"Oh no! I'm not leaving you alone if he pays us a visit! I'm staying here in case he comes!" said Homer.
Abe sighed.
== Plot 3 ==
At school Oscar got in trouble again. This time he found Jimbo and his friends smoking, but wouldn't tell on them.
"Actually I want a cigarette to try one." said Oscar.
"Woooow! Gnarly!" The bullies were more than happy to let him.
"But it's coming out of your lunch money little dude." said Jimbo giving him a cigarette and lighting it.
However Oscar barely got to smoke before they were all caught by Rob Reiner gasping offended. He was holding a chicken drumstick.
"Mr Reiner I am mortified my pupils have been caught smoking!" Skinner gasped when Jimbo and his friends and Oscar were brought to his office by Rob Reiner.
"So you should be." said Rob Reiner eating a chicken drumstick.
"Boys I will be calling your parents! Prepare to be scolded..." Skinner hoped their angry parents would set them straight.
"Our parents don't care what we get up to..." said Jimbo.
"My Dad's encourage my smoking habit." said Dolph.
"My parents are dead." said Oscar.
"Oh. Well shucks I'm stuck then..." said Skinner.
"Skinnnnnner!" Chalmers yelled.
"Super Intendant Chalmers!" Skinner gasped.
"Seymour I have an idea. These boys might not be afraid of their parents. But they will be after I have them suspended..l"
"Nope! The bullies and Oscar shake their heads.
"We'll suspend them anyway." said Chalmers.
"Send them to Pleasure Island from Disney's Pinocchio! That'll sort them out!" said Rob Reiner eating a burger.
"Mr Reiner that place isn't real..." Chalmers sighed. "But you can be our guest speaker and run a no smoking or drugs campaign!"
"That's a brilliant idea! Drugs and smoking are bad!" said Reiner eating a burger.
However at the Simpsons Oscar did get disappointed remarks from Marge and Homer and a mild scolding. As much as they could without setting off his dark side.
"Oz... smoking is not cool... I did a massive crossover with Bugs bunny and every cartoon character ever on it..." said Bart. "It's very bad for your health..."
"I guess I'll have to spy on you to make sure you don't smoke..." Bart added.
In gym. Action music played as Oscar's class got ready for gym in the changing rooms.
In the sock bin Bart emerged wearing army camouflage and dressed as Dutch from Predator or John Matrix from Commando. He was staring furiously at Oscar to keep an eye on him.
Oscar had put Clownjas in the sock bin, but they fainted from the stench of socks. Bart sighed at the sight of Clownjas fainting in the socks.
Meanwhile Rob Reiner living up to his antagonistic side seen in South Park was holding assemblies and campaigns against smoking and drugs but was in absolute support for kids eating fast food and came to blows with TV chef Jamie Oliver.
"Fast food is bad! Did you know kids at your school were sneaking out at lunch times to buy take aways?" Jamie Oliver asked Skinner. Oscar was in the background eating fish and chips in a newspaper.
"Oh my!" Skinner was horrified.
"Now hold on a second!" Rob Reiner interrupted while eating fried chicken. "Fast food is good for children!"
"No it's not! How could you say something like that?!" Jamie Oliver was horrified.
"I am Rob Reiner and everyone agrees with me!" Rob Reiner yelled. He didn't have a crowd of stupid towns folk who quickly jump to support the main antagonist of the episode and his stupidity.
"Rob this is Springfield, not South Park, Colorado..." said Bart. "Everyone here isn't moronically stupid and quick to follow the antagonist like he's the pied piper of Hamlyn."
"Damn it people! Listen to me!" Rob yelled.
But people wouldn't listen to him. Although they were stupid in the episode about Bart and Grampa's pocket watch. Instead they listened to Jamie Oliver's health advice because it made sense. However skinner made excuses that the school budget can't afford fresh vegetables.
Everyone booed and jeered at Skinner.
Jamie Oliver took over Lunch Lady Doris's kitchen and cooked healthy food from his recipes while naked! Yes naked in a school kitchen.
"Well I am the naked chef." said Jamie Oliver.
Oscar gave his cookery books Star Wars themed titles.
The Naked Chef.
The Naked Chef Strikes Back.
The Return of the Naked Chef.
The Naked Chef: The Phantom Nudist.
The Naked Chef: The Attack of the Clothes.
The Naked Chef: Revenge of the Dish.
"And the sequels, The Named Chef: The Sauce Awakens!" said Oscar as the kids got their lunch served by Naked Jamie Oliver.
"Jamie Oliver put some clothes on! That's indecent?" Skinner yelled.
Then they asked him to leave if he wouldn't put clothes on. He went back to Britain and opened a restaurant on a pier with a man called Jimmy and had celebrities such as Mark Hamill cameo.
Meanwhile Bart and Milhouse dressed Santa's little Helper up as a chupacabra by dressing him in Grandma Van Houten's fur coat and taping t bones to his head as horns.
"I had to go dumpster diving round the back of Bottomless Pete's Barbecue pit." said Bart taping on the t bones.
"Uh excuse me? Dumpster diving?" Milhouse asked.
"Yes..." said Bart.
"Bart, you do know by now of Oscar's stupidity involving clowns and dumpsters..." said Milhouse.
"Yes I mean to have words with him after this little guy bit me while I was dumpster diving..." said Bart holding a rabid Clownja with green hair and a red shiny nose, snarling.
Then Bart unfortunately wasn't believed by his Care of Magical Creatures teacher with his make up creatures plan.
"Nice try Barto... but none of these creatures are genuine cryptids..." said the teacher, who was a hip young teacher.
Bart sighed.
And Rob Reiner was trying to offer kids fast food. Which they were very eager to take.
"Right that's it!" Kyle Broflovski yelled as he stabbed Rob Reiner with a pin.
"Ahhh! You accursed brat! Look what you've done?!" Rob screamed as green ooze leaked out of him. "My ooze! I'm leaking! I'm leeeeeakkkking! Oh what a world! Who thought a child could destroy my beautiful wickedness! Oh! Oh!...' Rob collapsed into skin and clothes as green ooze leaked out of him.
"Eeeeeew!" said Stan.