If the ride up the elevator to the penthouse takes forever, then the biometric scanner at the door somehow takes even longer.
When she built the damn thing, she built it for protection, not for speed, but as she waits on the iris scanner to process through the one million specific data points that make it practically unhackable - even by Lena herself - she finds herself rethinking her priorities.
Because right now she needs nothing more than to be inside her apartment, locked away from the world.
The penthouse was her one solace.
Her one impenetrable place.
Everywhere else had been invaded.
By the media, the DEO, Lex, Cadmus, you name it.
But here, here was safe.
Luckily, Kara will be held up at the DEO debriefing that Lena had run out on for at least another hour or two. By then, Lena will have had time to scrub Kara's biometrics from the apartment entry software and fully lock herself in her apartment.
Her own little fortress of solitude.
She almost laughs at the irony.
She's too angry to laugh, too hurt - too angry at being hurt.
How dare Kara - how dare Supergirl, for that matter- call her out for her 'reckless behavior' in front of Alex and the other DEO agents.
Her plan was well calculated, and she was very aware of the risks she was taking by going through with it.
Besides, she made it out with barely a few bruises.
Only because Kara rescued you. the traitorous part of her brain unhelpfully adds.
The locks on the door finally click open, and she lets herself in, fully re-engaging the security protocol behind her.
Lena is well and truly pissed.
She doesn't remember being this pissed in a long fucking time; and she's certainly never been this pissed at Kara.
How dare she?
Really!
Of all the nerve!
To try and publicly admonish Lena for something she herself would have done - has done - time and time over.
Just because she's Supergirl, she thinks she can be all self righteous and holier-than-thou and you know what?
Fuck her.
Fuck her and her stupid cape, and her stupid heat vision and her stupid flying and her stupid fucking hair and . , ,
"Yeahhughh!" Lena shouts, slamming the control panel of her security system closed. There, let Kara try to get in now.
Good fucking luck.
Unless she just decided to use brute strength and force her way in.
But Lena had just had to listen to a thirty minute lecture about how perfect fucking superheroes never do anything "unethical", so that would be a little out of character, now wouldn't it?
With a few quick switches, she brings down the bulletproof shades down over the floor to ceiling windows looking out over National City. After only a moment's hesitation, she also brings down the lead shades she'd installed.
Let Kara wonder what she's up to and worry about her.
Serves her right.
With one final look over everything to make sure she's locked in tight, Lena heads to to the kitchen. There's a bottle of Scotch with her name on it, and she thinks it's high time she indulges. She even goes for one of those fancy circle ice cubes that her chef insists make everything a 'designer cocktail'; but after she pours a couple of fingers into her favorite glass, something stops her.
It's Kara's voice in her head - because of fucking course it is - asking tentatively if maybe she should talk about her problems instead of trying to drink them away.
And you know what?
Fuck that, because the memory of Kara is quickly ushered along by one of her therapist - and she is not in any sort of mood to be thinking about therapy of all things. Without giving herself time for second thoughts, she pours the amber liquid down the drain with a scowl.
Damn it, if Kara can ruin a good glass of Scotch, then she can ruin just about anything
With a huff, she heads to her master suite, because if she can't self harm with alcohol then she can at least take a scalding hot shower. And maybe that's not exactly healthy either; but Kara's voice in her head is silent at least, and besides, she needs a shower. She knows that her hair is a mess and she's pretty sure Alex was crinkling her nose in disgust whenever Lena stepped upwind of her at the debriefing.
Guess entering the alien ship through the trash chute wasn't her most hygienic option; but hey, it got the job done at least.
She turns the shower nozzle on as hot as it will go, and then waits for steam to fill up the bathroom before she sheds her clothes and steps in.
It's only a few minutes before her skin is red from the heat but she feels marginally better; the smell of lavender and mint permeating the bathroom.
When she eventually becomes numb to the sting of the water, she turns the knobs in the other direction until she's being blasted with water so cold that it almost feels like she's doing one of Alex's ridiculous ice water plunges.
She washes her hair twice before she's satisfied enough to move on to conditioner, and she alternates the water temperature between the two extremes at least four times; that and the extra attention from her loofah leaving her skin feeling tingly and raw.
As she stands in front of the mirror drying her hair with a towel, she has to admit that the shower was definitely more productive than the drinking. Plus she still has a clear head and all of her faculties.
Faculties that she can use to plot petty revenge on her girlfriend.
The thought gives her pause.
Was Kara still her girlfriend?
They hadn't exactly broken up, but they hadn't exactly talked either.
Well, besides Kara having the audacity to call her attempt to save the world 'hare-brained' and 'borderline stupid'. But now Lena has effectively taken away Kara's keys to her apartment, and it's not like Kara has bothered to try and come by anyways.
Maybe they were over.
Good riddance, in Lena's book.
She didn't need Supergirl, or Kara Danvers. Or friends for that matter. Or the DEO, or game night, or Kara eating ice cream with her at three in the morning when she can't sleep or -
She doesn't need any of it.
She was doing just fine on her own.
Just like she was doing just fine on that alien ship before Kara came to 'rescue' her.
Angrily, she yanks a hairbrush through any tangles the conditioner left behind, and throws on a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt.
But damn it if it isn't one of Kara's t-shirts that she accidentally pulls out of the drawer.
She doesn't realize it's Kara's until after she's pulled it over her head ,and even though tears sting her eyes at the realization, she doesn't take it off.
It's one of the plain white v-necks that Kara likes to hang around the apartment in, and it's slightly too big for Lena. Muscles and aggressive lounging have stretched it out, and it's soft almost to the point of threadbare.
Fuck it.
It's her shirt now.
She's claiming it.
Not in a 'steal it from your girlfriend to be cute' way, but in a petty theft kind of way.
Hows that for 'unethical'?
She'll just tell Kara to add that to her long list of crimes against humanity.
She pads into the living room, frowning when she sees the blinking light on her security camera monitor. Who could possibly be bothering her now?
A quick look shows that it's not the lobby camera but the balcony camera, and she flicks the feed over to see Kara - Supergirl - hovering outside.
She should have guessed, really.
Of all of Kara's annoying qualities, tenacity was certainly one of the top five.
Kara's gaze shoots to the camera, almost as if she senses Lena watching her.
"Lena, I know you're in there." Kara's voice is pleading, but Lena makes no move to answer; instead shifting her attention to her cuticles. She could really use a manicure, and she makes a mental note to text Jess later.
It's a long moment before the camera's speaker sounds again.
"You took my biometrics off of the balcony door lock."
. . .
"I'm going to assume that you took them off of the inside door as well, because you're nothing if not thorough." Kara spits the word out like it's derogatory, and Lena can't help but feel a spike of sinful pride.
The silence lasts a good five minutes this time before Kara speaks.
"Damn it, Lena! Let me in!"
There it is.
The anger Lena's been waiting for.
Normally Supergirl stays so calm and proper, but occasionally, occasionally, she lets that Kryptonian temper fly.
Lena allows a hint of an evil grin before she shuts the camera monitor off and walks to the refrigerator. Just because she can't use her fancy ice cubes for whiskey, doesn't mean she can't use them in a sparkling water; because nothing says 'gloating super villain' like a bottle of water that costs more than Kara makes in an hour.
So, she fixes another glass with ice and pours the water in until the bubbles almost spill over the top. Then she takes a long, refreshing sip - letting the hint of lemon-lime in the effervescence tickle her nose.
You're not a super villain. You're not a villain at all. the voice in her head reminds her.
The thought should bring her peace, but instead it only infuriates her more. Just because she chooses to do things differently than Supergirl doesn't mean that Kara gets to guilt trip her about it.
She does a lot of good for this world.
A whole hell of a lot more good than anyone in her family has ever done bad; despite Lex and Lillian's best efforts. She's more than made up for her family name, and she's more than proved herself an ally to Supergirl, and how dare Kara try to make her feel like anything less.
She drains the glass before slamming it down with a little more force than necessary.
Fuck.
Fuckity, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck.
She braces herself against the kitchen counter, staring blankly past the glass doors of the cabinets at the cups and bowls meticulously stacked inside.
She's not sure how long she stands there before a loud crack from living room snaps her attention away. She turns to see Kara standing just inside, the remnants of Lena's door lock dangling from her fingertips.
Lena clucks her tongue.
"Well, well, well; Supergirl breaking and entering, aren't you just the little deviant."
Kara's eyes are flaming with anger, and Lena's half surprised that she hasn't been melted into the floor with heat vision.
After a long staring contest, Kara walks towards Lena's work bench in the corner and tosses the pieces of door lock on it.
"Right, cause I'm just Miss goody-two-shoes."
"If the shoe fits." Lena smirks at the cleverness of her own pun, but Kara's scowl only deepens as she stalks into the kitchen.
Her gaze darts around before settling on the empty glass on the counter and then the still open bottle of Scotch. She gives Lena a hard glare.
"Really, Lena? You leave me outside so you can what? Get drunk and ignore your feelings?"
Kara's voice raises as she speaks, and the end of the question comes out in a bellow; Kara's face red and angry as she reaches for the bottle of Scotch and pitches it across the kitchen.
It shatters against the countertop, and once again Lena's finds herself grateful that she always invests in durable building supplies.
Normally, Kara would look petulant after any sort of outburst, but in this case it's seemed only to fan the flames of her ire. Her entire body is shaking so much that she's practically vibrating.
Years of dealing with the Luthor family drama is the only thing that lets Lena look unbothered, despite the discontent in her chest.
"I was drinking water, actually, but thank you for getting rid of the rest of the bottle, I'm trying to cut back."
Kara almost has the decency to look scolded, but it fades quickly.
"You are . . ."
"What?" Lena snaps.
"Completely infuriating."
"You just can't stand it that I can fix things without your help, can you? It really gets under your skin that I can do just as much good as you without parading myself as some sort of paragon of honor and justice."
Kara barks a laugh.
"That's what you think this is? You think I'm upset because you're trying to do good? Every time you go off on one of your hare-brained schemes -"
"There's that word again, you know you'd think for an ace reporter you'd have a broader vocabulary." Lena can tell by Kara's shift in posture that her words hit home, and she allows herself a moment to gloat before Kara's steely blue eyes settle heavily on her and she feels the breath seep out of her chest.
"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were trying to make me angry." Kara's voice is dangerous and low, igniting something in Lena - a feeling she can't quite place.
In an odd sort of way, It feels good, to have Kara angry at her.
To have Kara expressing something instead of that stone cold facade she'd held at the DEO. Lena craves it, needs it.
Needs something to distract her from the aftermath of delayed panic and guilt that's starting to overtake her.
"Maybe I am."
Lena knows what she's doing is basically like dangling raw meat in front of a bear and daring it to chase after her.
Kara studies her for a long moment before lifting her gaze away. The silence floats around them like a fog as Kara stares off in the distance - her stare fixated on something that isn't really there. Her fingers drumroll heavy on the counter and the durability of the quartz counter top is tested for a second time that night.
Lena can see the muscles of her jaw clenching and unclenching, teeth grinding together so harshly that she briefly wonders if the creation of diamonds would be possible under such conditions.
After a few long, tense minutes, Kara's gaze settles back on Lena and she shifts under the weight of it.
"Do you think," Kara takes a slow step forward before repeating herself. "Do you think I do it for you? Do you think that when you recklessly throw yourself into danger that I just drop everything and rescue you, for you? Do you think you're so important that I just risk everything for you?" She's close enough now that her breathy laugh ghosts over Lena's face.
"I'm a very . . . selfish woman, Lena. All those times that I threw caution to the wind, that I risked the very fate of the universe in order to save you - I did it for me."
Kara's gaze is threatening to burn a, (quite literal), hole in Lena's skull and she can't help but take a step back. Only, Kara follows, and now Lena's boxed in between her and the counter. The exact definition of a rock and a hard place.
"Do you know why, I always rescue you, Lena?" Both her tone and the fingers tracing Lena's cheekbone are overtly tender, but right below the surface is an edge of sharpened steel.
"Because I have lost everything , and I will not lose you." Kara's hand drops to Lena's neck, thumb pressing harshly into her bottom lip.
It's some sort of animal instinct that has Lena tilting her head to the side, exposing her neck like a dog to its alpha.
Kara's eyes study her face for a long while, as if she's cataloguing every detail for her sketchbook later.
Lena uses the opportunity to analyze Kara.
Her blonde hair has been washed of the grease that had been streaking it earlier. and she smells faintly of ozone and unfallen rain, and Lena wonders how much time she spent circling in the atmosphere before she decided to stop by for a visit.
Long enough to get pissed, by the look of barely concealed rage on her face.
That's ok, Lena's pissed too; and she's never been one to back away from a fight.
"If you would just listen to me -" Kara starts but Lena's already heard enough.
"You mean if I would just shut up and do what you tell me."
"That's not what I said."
"But that's what you meant, isn't it? That your life would be easier if I would just fall in line and do things the Supergirl way. Spoiler alert, Kara; the Supergirl way isn't always the best way."
With one last, defiant meeting of their eyes, Lena sidesteps out of Kara's reach and uses a broom to start sweeping at the remnants of the broken Scotch bottle on the floor.
She can feel Kara's eyes on her, but she very pointedly ignores her, choosing instead to keep her back positioned to the superhero.
When the majority of the glass is scooped up and deposited in the trash, she reaches for a washcloth, wetting it in the sink before turning her attention to the shards of glass on the countertop, carefully wiping them onto the dustpan.
"Lena."
The plea in Kara's voice is evident, but Lena still ignores it, forcing herself to stay focused on the task at hand.
"Lena."
This time Kara is more insistent, and her hand reaches out to rest on Lena's shoulder, but Lena shrugs it off with grunt.
Before can even process what's happening, Kara is spinning her around; pressing Lena's hips hard into the counter with her own, bending her backwards until her head is trapped against the cabinets.
Kara's laugh is dark.
"Do you even realize how fragile you are?"
Lena can't deny that Kara's aura is a little frightening, and her hands scramble for purchase on the counter, looking for anything to give her leverage. She feels the fragment of glass under her finger like crumb a split second before she registers the prick of pain.
"Shit." she jerks her hand up, trying to examine the wound, but Kara intercepts it, closing her fingers around Lena's wrist in a bruising grip. Lena's tries unsuccessfully to snatch her hand back, but Kara doesn't relent; her tone mocking as she smirks.
"See? Fragile."
"Stop that, I'm bleeding."
"What, you don't want me to clean up your mess this time?"
Lena just thought she was mad before.
If looks could kill, then Kara would certainly be dead from the daggers that Lena is shooting into her skull.
Before she can voice a come back, Kara's lips close around the tip of her finger, sucking away the dark red droplet of blood so she can get an unobstructed view of the wound. It irritates Lena to know that Kara can hear the uptick in her heart rate just like she can hear the way Lena's breath catches in her throat at the intimate action.
Kara's eyes narrow as she examines Lena's finger, and Lena knows that she's using her x-ray vision to check for hidden injuries.
Hidden injuries.
On practically a fucking paper cut for gods sake.
She uses Kara's distraction to successfully jerk her hand away, but in less than a split second, she's been recaptured and whisked to the sink. The water is cold as Kara holds the offended finger under the stream, and Lena can't help but roll her eyes.
Just like Kara to be over protective and smothering - a fact that's even more evident when Lena feels the rush of wind as Kara super speeds to the hall closet where the first aid kit is kept and returns with a bandaid and antiseptic in hand.
Kara's look dares Lena to argue with her, and Lena chooses to pick her battles.
So Lena holds still as Kara cleans and dresses her wound, minor as it may be, green eyes attempting to bore a hole from one side of Kara's head to the other. Finally, the job is finished, and Lena turns her glare to the bright yellow bandage around her finger.
She huffs angrily.
"Kara this is fucking ridiculous, I'm more than capable of - "
The sound of a fist connecting with the wall startles her, and she looks up to see Kara hulking over her - eyes dark and cheeks red.
"You still don't get it, do you?" Kara glowers, and once again her hand settles on Lena's neck. This time, her thumb gently massages at Lena's pulse point.
Lena knows, knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that Kara would never hurt her; but her point is loud and clear -
If she wanted to, she could.
The realization sends a shiver down Lena's spine as her eyes shutter closed. She swallows against the pressure on her throat; and when her eyes reopen, Kara is closer than before - blue eyes harsh and glinting as she dares Lena to resist.
Lena doesn't exactly fight her, but she doesn't back down either. For a few long, tense moments, their breath mixes in the air between until Lena isn't quite sure if it's Kara's imposing presence thats leaving her weak in the knees or if it's too much carbon dioxide from their shared air.
"Do it." she dares Kara in a whisper.
"What?"
"Don't play stupid." Lena's voice is raw and broken with emotion, and again she swallows pointedly against Kara's grip; never breaking eye contact.
"We both know you want to hurt me."
Kara doesn't respond verbally, but her fingers flex against Lena's neck.
The tension between them is tight, like a bungee cord about to break; and Lena isn't sure if the resulting snap will bring them crashing together or send them falling apart.
"Do it. Show me you're the only one who gets to break me apart, Supergirl."
Kara's reaction this time is instantaneous.
She lifts Lena effortlessly onto the countertop, stepping between her legs as Lena's head and back slam into the cabinet.
"Fuck." The word is barely spoken before Kara swallows it - teeth clashing against Lena's as her tongue lays claim to Lena's mouth.
The kiss is hot and heavy and possessive, and if Lena thought she was low on oxygen before, she's running on fumes now; her breath panting at every split second of relief she's given from onslaught of Kara's lips. The hand on her hip is bruising, and the hand on her throat moves to fist in her hair. It's too much and not enough; and her own hands are against Kara chest - pushing her away or pulling her in, she isn't really sure which.
Before she can process what's happening, her sweatpants and underwear are yanked off and thrown across the room, and she's hissing as the coldness of the countertop meets her bare ass. Kara makes quick work of her stolen shirt, Lena's negligence at putting on a bra after her shower leaving her nipples peaked and aching as they're exposed to the air.
Then Kara is pressed against her, the material of the super suit rubbing against Lena's still tender skin. But, Kara is warm, so warm, the heat radiating off of her like a furnace; and Lena tugs her impossibly closer, ankles locking around her waist. She shivers as er cunt rubs agains Kara's pelvis, the one place of connection where Lena is hotter than Kara.
"Fuck." Lena repeats, only this time it comes out half slurred, Kara's tongue thick in her mouth.
She should really be careful what she wishes for, because Kara shifts and the hand that was on her waist is now inside her - three of the fingers, anyway, judging by the stretch. It hurts, but she wants more, something inside of her needing to feel Kara's raw power. Kara may need to see that she's the only one with the power to destroy Lena; but so does Lena. Whether she admits it or not, today's close call has left her frightened and vulnerable, and she needs reassurance that Kara will always be there to save her.
So she clutches at Kara, one hand gripping her cape and one on the elbow of the hand that's inside of her, the seam of material that loops over Kara's palm chaffing at her sensitive skin while Kara thumbs her clit. Kara's fingers slip almost completely out before they piston back in, knuckles slamming in so hard that Lena feels her pelvic bone jar with the force.
She's losing all aspects of higher brain function; the only sounds she's capable of making are keening half syllables of desperation. The hand in Lena's hair applies a steady pressure, pulling her back until Kara has easy access to her neck. Lena know as soon as those warm lips give way to teeth on her collarbone that she going to be relegated to high collars for a least a week to hide the bruising.
Kara leads a wet trail down Lena's chest, her fingers never slowing their violent rhythm. As her lips close around Lena's nipple, encasing it in a warm, wet heat, Lena feels her brain short circuit. There's nothing but white hot heat behind her eyes and down her chest, exploding out of her center.
She can feel the wave of orgasm cresting already, and tears prick at the corners of her eyes. Kara must feel her start to tighten because she pulls her head back from Lena's chest and releases her vice grip on Lena's hair. That hand moves instead back to Lena's neck, and this time the pressure isn't merely suggested - it's real - leaving Lena gasping helplessly for air as she chases her release. Her eyes roll back in her head and the rollercoaster is just about to come crashing down the hill when Kara's hand moves again to, (almost gently), cup her chin before her thumb hooks into Lena's panting mouth and pulls their foreheads together.
"Look at me when you cum." Kara growls, and Lena has no choice but to obey. Their eyes meet in a storm of blue and green, pupils wide with lust and fury. The sight is enough to send Lena past the point of no return and her body shakes uncontrollably as her cunt spasms around Kara's still thrusting fingers, her slick spilling into Kara's hand.
She might black out, she's not entirely sure; but when she comes back to her senses Kara's forehead is resting on her shoulder, and her fingers are still thrusting inside Lena - albeit at a much gentler pace.
"Kara." she chokes out in a strangled cry, her body shuddering with the aftershocks of her release.
"I've got you, I've got you." Kara promises fervently as she slowly withdraws her hand from its ministrations and scoops Lena up into a bridal carry.
It takes all of Lena's strength to wrap her arms around Kara's neck; but then Kara's lips are on hers, soft and gentle this time. It's easy to lose herself in the kiss, the emotion, the perfect bliss of Kara's embrace. At least until she feels Kara's lips curl in a smirk and she pulls back to see her girlfriend sporting a very self satisfied smile.
Something is triggered in Lena at the almost gloating expression on Kara's face.
Despite the emotional and physical high she just experienced, she can't help but feel a sense of wounded pride at the fact that Kara, in essence, won.
Yet again, Kara gets to play the hero, swooping in and 'rescuing' Lena at the last minute; carrying her distressing damsel off into the sunset.
Lena levels her gaze at the superhero.
Kara coming away from this feeling like the victor?
That, that simply won't do.
Luthors may lose, but Lena - Lena never does.