They walked arm in arm across the plaza in front of the Hoover Building. Her head on his shoulder, his head leaning against her head. They were both a little shell shocked at what just happened. Booth proposed that they give a romantic relationship a try and Bones reluctantly rejected the idea. It felt to both of them like this could be the last time they would ever have this natural physicality with each other because once they reached the street and got into separate cabs, everything would change.

Booth said he was moving on. Bones knew he would start seriously looking for that person he was seeking. She was relieved that he agreed to their continued work partnership, but it also meant that she would have a front row seat as he fell in love with someone else. And the thing was, she wished she could be that person. She had known for a long time that she had strong feelings for him. But she also believed that love was a chemical reaction in the brain and therefore fleeting. By trying a romantic relationship, she was convinced it was doomed to fail at some point, but if they remained strictly work partners they could stay together indefinitely.

All Booth could think about was how long he had desired her. It really started the moment he saw her on the stage of the lecture hall at American University. Over the next couple of years, he came to the realization that it was more than simple physical desire. It had slowly dawned on him that she was the reason he wasn't really dating much, and never had a desire for a second date. She was the standard, and he had yet to meet a woman who could measure up. Why wouldn't she give him a chance? She said she couldn't change, but he wasn't asking her to - he didn't want her to.

So they clung to each other as they slowly walked toward the road where they knew they could hail their individual cabs. Neither of them wanted to reach the end of the plaza. They both knew that tomorrow morning they would go to work in their individual offices and everything would be changed. Some things would be unchanged. He would call her to say they had a case. He would pick her up. But what would they talk about on the drive? Would there be uncomfortable silences? Would they both be afraid to bring up personal topics? Would one or both find excuses not to have lunch in the diner? They reached the street and far too quickly an available cab pulled up. Bones reluctantly pulled her arm from within the crook of his and they both felt a chill when their bodies separated. He opened her door, she climbed in, gave him a sad smile, and was gone. Booth just stood on the sidewalk watching until the cab disappeared from view.

Bones climbed into her bed shortly after arriving at her apartment. It was early for her, but she decided that the oblivion of sleep would be better than sitting around thinking about those last few hours. And she knew better than to even try to read her professional journals. The articles in them required concentration and that would have been impossible. But sleep wouldn't come. She had been lying there for almost an hour because she just couldn't turn off the voices in her head. She wondered what Booth was doing right now? Did he go right home, or did he find it necessary to go out for a few beers? Or, more likely, a few rounds of scotch? Has he already accepted the decision they made and was he planning to ask someone out? Or is he having as much trouble as she is with this decision? Damn that Sweets! When he challenged Booth to be a gambler, she thought that he would dismiss the notion out of hand. Booth stopped gambling years ago and went to GA meetings any time he felt vulnerable. So why did Booth take him up on it and take that gamble? Everything was just fine - there was no reason to rock the boat.

So now what? She really cared about him, so she wanted him to be happy. But did she really want him to be happy with another woman? Just thinking about it, thinking about him dating another woman, marrying her, starting a family with her, was so, so painful. So what did that say about her feelings toward him? Were they so strong that she couldn't let him go? She berated herself. 'No! If you care about him so much, you have to let him find his happiness. You turned him down because you don't believe that you can give him what he needs, and what has changed in the last few hours?' Even though she felt that love wasn't something that could last, she knew that he did. Finding his one great love was a goal he had been chasing his entire adult life, so it would be selfish of her to enter into a relationship with him when she didn't believe in that concept. Tying herself to him with the loose strings she required would prevent him from living out his dream. She cared about him too much to do that to him. Was what she felt, love? Maybe. But, again, love is ephemeral. She really believed that and repeated it to herself all night as she tossed and turned trying to find some sleep.

After seeing Bones into her cab, Booth hailed one for himself. He went straight home, walked right to the liquor cart, and sat on the sofa, setting the bottle of scotch and the heavy tumbler on the coffee table. He left the lights off and the only light was the ambient glow coming through the windows from the street below. It suited his mood. Bones. How had it gone so wrong in just a matter of minutes? He had suspected it for awhile, but after he woke from his coma, he knew for certain that he was in love with her. But he knew it was going to take some time for her to catch up. That's Bones. You can't rush her. She has to collect data, analyze it, and then come to a decision. As certain as he is that he loves her, he's also certain that she loves him. He has been trying to teach her about love and caring and family and all the things she missed out on growing up. But sitting here drinking his scotch, he realizes she isn't ready yet. Damn that Sweets! Why did he let Sweets talk him into rushing her like that? It was probably mentioning gambling that did it. Booth has been proud of the way he overcame his gambling addiction, but just that suggestion from Sweets was too much to resist. Because it was something he wanted to do anyway - had wanted to do for months. If it was any other woman, she would probably have been swept off her feet by his "proposal". But this wasn't "any other woman". This is Bones. She's so special. It's one of the things he loves about her. He gambled and lost. And he fears that he's lost her forever.

So now what? He promised her that they could still work together, so it means he will be working side by side with her several days per week. And he will put himself out there looking for someone who will love him, and more importantly, someone who actually believes in love. And he will have to watch her dating other men. Just the thought of her sleeping with other men is so, so painful. He knows that was happening earlier in their partnership, but it seemed like she wasn't dating so much in the last year. He thought it had something to do with her feelings for him. But now that that ship has sailed, if he's dating other women, she will probably date other men. It just felt so bleak. How could he expect to fall in love with another woman if he was still in love with Bones? You can't just stop loving someone because you tell yourself to stop. The only way he could see it happening would be to stop working with her - to put her out of his life completely. But he wasn't going to do that. He made a promise to her tonight about the partnership. Plus, the thought of never seeing her was just unimaginable. It had been a long time since he had felt this much overwhelming pain. He couldn't bring himself to stand up and walk to the bedroom, so he finally curled up on the sofa, still in his work clothes, and napped for a few hours.