Mr. Overland,

It seems that you have decided to ignore all of my warnings, despite my best efforts to persuade you otherwise, and I cannot cover for you anymore.

I love my grandfather, but there is nothing anyone out there can do once his stubborn mind is set on something, and I'm sorry to inform you, Mr. Frost, that the old man is determined to have your pets—but mostly the dogs—kicked out of his building.

As I have informed you before, there have been numerous noise and disturbance complaints (which, sadly were filed by other tenants besides my close-minded cranky grandparents) regarding your pets over the past six months, yet no action was taken to solve the problem, or so it was claimed. I'm afraid the opposition will take advantage of your 'negligence' to seek legal action. Along with this note from yours truly, you have received an official eviction notice hereby terminating your lease.

You must evict your apartment within fifteen days from the effectiveness of the notice, or grandpa will feel entitled to burn any of your belongings still within his property past the deadline. I'm not even joking, Mr. Frost. He's already contacted a company to do just that. And God only knows what he'll try to do to the pets. Skin them alive would be my first guess.

You know how to reach me if you have any further inquiries. I'm sorry it has come to this. Let's go for coffee sometime this week if you're free. I'm really gonna miss your dumb face.

Best,

Pippa

P.S. I'm returning your Star Wars Blu-ray box. Han Solo is an ass.

"Fuck."

Dropping his messenger bag on the couch, he drags his feet to the pantry and the dogs come lapping after him, expecting a treat, but he shoves them out of the way with his knee. As he carefully inspects his girl scout cookie options, he pulls out his phone so he can dial his emotional support system in this dire moment of need.

"Tooth is in the shower," says Bunny as a means of greeting from the other side of the line. "What do you want?"

"I'm being evicted."

There's a pause, and then a grunt, and then a simple, "Oof."

Jack pulls his phone away and glares at it, wishing he'd thought of Facetiming just so Bunny could see the deep annoyance on his face. Without the visual aid, however, Jack has to content himself with snarling, "That's all you have to say?"

"What? Like they haven't been hammering the same crap for months, dimwit."

Jack rubs his forehead, feeling an incoming migraine brewing. "Seems pretty official this time though."

"Here's a bright idea," Bunny articulates the words slowly, his tone condescending, "Get rid of the mutts!"

"Did you seriously just suggest that, you fucking prick?"

The other guy sighs. "Listen, I'm all for philanthropy just as the next person, and you taking those poor battered strays is commendable, sure, but blind idealism can only take you so far. And in your case, it's taking you to live under a bridge if you do nothing about it."

Jack scowls at the box of Samoas with an intensity no cookie, no matter how long past its expiration date it is, could ever deserve. The paper box bends between his fingers. "Forget I told you anything…"

"I'm serious, Overland."

"Yeah, whatever." Jack huffs, but he knows he can't get all that mad at Bunny, for no matter how much he hates to admit it, Bunny is probably, tangentially, right this time.

"Hold on, Tooth's here." There's some rustling on the other side and Bunny's voice is muffled when he speaks next. "Your stupid friend is soon to become homeless. Talk to him."

More fumbling, something about Jack being their collective stupid friend, then a recognizable sigh, then Tooth's tinkly voice asking, "What the hell is going on, Jack?"

"Got an eviction notice," he casually explains, trying to downplay the magnitude of his conundrum. "I have two weeks to empty my apartment or they're gonna throw all my stuff out, barbecue my dogs, and they're gonna be shoving enough lawsuits for a lifetime up my ass."

"Damn. That doesn't sound good." Tooth hums, thinking to herself. After a moment, she perks up. "Why don't you come stay with us?"

Her genuine and impromptu offer warms him up inside like only Tooth can, and he grins, leaning against the closed fridge door. His pitbull comes back to nudge his leg, and he pats it on the head affectionately. His mood is so improved in fact that he even tosses a dog biscuit in the air for the dog to catch.

"Can I do that?"

"Of course you can, silly!" she beams. "Bunny and I would be more than happy to have you."

"NO, I WOULDN'T!" Bunny shouts in the background loud enough to be heard through the call.

"We can help you pack and everything, free of charge!" Tooth continues, trying her best to speak over her shouting husband.

"Girl, I don't even know what to say."

"That's what friends are for, dummy. You don't have to say anything."

"Aw—Wait, are you and Bunny still trying to get pregnant?"

"Yeah, why?"

Jack laughs awkwardly, running a hand through his hair. He looks away even though they're not in the same room and tries to shrink to the size of a pillbug. "On second thought, Imma see if Hiccup is down for rooming with me again. I mean, he can't still be mad at me about the grilled cheese incident, right?"

"But—"

"Thanks for the offer though, love ya! Bye!"

Salutations! If you read And They Were Quarantined!, you probably know what to expect. Short chapters, independent scenes, witty banter, and salty humor. Also, I have 20k+ words already written for this story. That's 30+ scenes I wrote without showing anyone. Holy fuck.