Chapter 34

AN: Part 2 - added 09/21/22

Part 1 - 09/12/2022

"Is that him?"

"Black hair. Black shirt. Black pants. Dark glasses. Dark skin, just like every black guy that came out of there, yea, it could be him."

Blake always says how she feels but if she says this, ZJ would be yelling at her right now. It's not offensive when it comes from ZJ herself; that's probably deliberate since she disagreed with this. It is hard to tell but what else is there to do? Waiting for that guy to call back is a waste of time. He might not even call again after seeing how many people showed up in the Langham Hotel the last time. Petrie's appearance ruined it but without her, I would've never found out. "I'm going." Amy said.

"Wait, what're you going to do?" ZJ asked, unable to hold onto Amy since she already stepped out of the car.

"Don't worry."

How could I not worry? This is New York. Two are already dead. That guy just came out of a strip club that is supposed to be closed. He could be carrying a gun.

"Isaac!...Hey! Isaac!"

That's her plan? Guess that works. That guy didn't even bother to look back. Blake, however, is shaking her head so she probably thinks that's stupid.

"mhm, I think she's getting a divorce." Blake said while wondering why ZJ looks confused. "Look at her."

What about her? Amy is now talking on the phone and looking very frustrated. That's normal. She has been behaving differently ever since she came back from Hawaii three weeks ago but that doesn't mean she's getting a divorce. All couples have arguments.

"I think she found out he cheated on her, mhm. I told her. Long distance relationship never works. Men cannot keep their hands and their"

"she's comin" ZJ said while knowing what Blake is going to say but apparently she didn't get the hint since she asked "Is that him?" as soon as Amy sat on the passenger seat.

"no, he's dead."

"He's dead?" ZJ said in shock at the same time as Blake did, then realized Blake also misunderstood. She should've been more specific. Another dead? Anthony didn't have any doubts but now it seems that he could be wrong. The fire that killed Max might not have been an accident. "How did they find out?" He only gave his first name but Isaac might not even be his real name. His phone couldn't be traced. Everyone in the hotel had a mask on. So how did they find out?

"Don't know." Amy said after letting out a long frustrated breath before asking ZJ to start the car. Blake should know what that means. ZJ should too even if she never worked for the government. Government secrets cannot be revealed. Government has their way of doing things and most of the time, their way doesn't make sense. The guy is dead. Why are we asked to look at pictures of him?

"Is that him?" Petrie asked.

You've got to be kidding me. Is she having memory issues? ZJ must be thinking of the same thing. Blake is looking like she wants to swear but is holding it in. No one would be able to recognize his mutilated body unless they're close to him. "We've never met him."

"No fingerprints but I think it's him."

Again, no explanation is given but an odd request is made. Send it to Anthony? This explains why she's showing the pictures to Blake and ZJ. She needs help identifying the corpse. She thinks it's him but she doesn't know who he is.

"Send it to him too."

"Why don't you send it?" Amy asked, immediately regretting responding so fast after noticing Blake's sudden fixed stare. Is it too late to say it's not what she's thinking? Probably. Blake might not know what happened but she must have figured it out that the reason for not wearing the wedding band is not because it could attract unwanted attention and not because I don't want to lose it. Even ZJ is looking like she wants to know why so that must mean Lucy hasn't yet told anyone.

"Let's talk over there." Petrie said.

Talking privately now isn't going to stop them from asking about it later. "Next time, don't mention him in front of them." At least she remembered to use him to refer to Lucy.

"Sorry"

That sounds genuine but what is she apologizing for since there's a lot she should be apologizing for.

"Are you going to leave him?"

"None of your business." It's rude but she should understand why. There's no proof that the trackers were also listening devices since Aria threw all of them away except for one and that one is destroyed by Lucy and thrown out of the helicopter but most likely, they are.

"I was hoping you'd say no."

Does she know how fake that sounds? Even if she has changed, she did tried to break us up for years. Even if this time isn't her fault, it's hard to believe that she would feel this way.

"Doc said…I should let you decide."

Dr. Ellen did say she should take it slow but she's taking way too much time to get to the point. "Decide what?" Petrie again is talking as slowly as Mr. P and the question asked is as odd as the previous one. If you can go back in time, would you still listen to it? "It's too late for that, don't you think?"

"Okay"

Okay? That's it? She has nothing else to say so that must be it. What a waste of time. It took a lot of time to get here. Why didn't she just send the pictures? Doesn't she know how to encrypt the files? She must be outdated like that asshole(Mr.P's supervisor). Incompetence will soon get her fired too.

"What happened?" ZJ asked.

"nothing" It's really nothing but ZJ doesn't believe it since she too thinks coming here just to show the pictures of the dead guy doesn't make sense. Blake, on the other hand, doesn't find anything wrong with it since there are a lot less people here, a lot of open space and fresh air and Petrie might be planning to leave. She's right. This is New York. It would take too long to drive thru the traffic. She's right about Lucy too but really? Here? Is this time to ask if I'm getting a divorce?

"Look on the bright side, you're not pregnant."

As upsetting as it is, Blake is right again. "Wait, give me a minute" Amy walked back to where Petrie is standing since ZJ has a point. As logical as Blake's explanation is, there has to be another reason. Petrie is still standing in the same spot, waiting with arms crossed as if she knows this would happen. "Yes. I would. Because the truth will eventually come out. I would rather know now than later. Tell Dr. Ellen, I don't need her help. I would just be lying to myself. I don't want to live that way." Does she really think I would want to try hypnosis to forget? After everything that's happened? After what happened to Lucy? She has to be

"If knowing the truth could ruin your life, do you still want to know the truth?" Petrie asked as Amy is walking away.

That wasn't loud but it's clear. That sounds familiar too. If Grace were here, she would have said no since she once said she wouldn't want to know the truth if it doesn't help. She was right. The outcome would've been different. It would've been better not knowing the truth but how could I? I'm not her. "YES" Amy responded loudly this time to make sure Petrie heard but it seems that she didn't since she asked again after moving closer. "YES" Is that clear enough? It is and ZJ is right. There is another reason for having this meeting here in Downtown Manhattan Heliport. It seems that Petrie already knew the answer before she even asked the question since a helicopter is already standing by but why can't Blake and ZJ go too? It doesn't make sense, not even after getting to the destination which took only 30 minutes. So what if Dr. Harrington aka Dr. Poland aka Dr. Neeva used to work here? No complaints and only high praises from those who works with her doesn't mean she is a good person. The recording from Aria's spy recorder might not have shown that she's the mastermind behind the incident in the underground hideout in Molokai but that doesn't mean she's not involved. She got what she wanted. She knows who has the key and now, she's nowhere to be found. She erased Lucy's memory without her permission. That makes her a criminal, a very dangerous one so why is Petrie saying good things about her like she's not. "Is she dead too?" Is this why she's here, to find more about her from her colleagues? If she is dead, then

"They said she's on your team."

"Excuse me?" Amy asked even though she has an idea of what Petrie is referring to since that's what people say these days but asked anyways in case she's referring to something else. She's not. She knows what that means but she obviously doesn't understand what love is. It would be a waste of time to explain. If she doesn't get it by now, she'll never get it.

"They said she had a fling with a nurse."

So? Doctors like nurses. That's common. Coworkers hook up. That happens everywhere. Just because they're both females, it doesn't mean this type of relationship has never happened in a workplace. It's not a crime unless it's not consensual. She didn't say it's not so why bring this up?

"This is her." Petrie said, holding onto the phone.

Now it makes more sense. Lucy never mentioned this. That's because the question was never asked. That's because it's impossible but now looking at the picture of a younger Dr. Harrington, it's not impossible if it happened more than 10 years ago even if she is older because Lucy likes beautiful woman especially blondes. "She's his ex?" Amy asked, continuing with the use of the male pronoun to refer to Lucy even though no one else is here.

"good question, never thought of that, that is possible, ask him"

Signs of dementia starts at 70, they say. They're right. Did she forget Lucy denied knowing Aria? If she can't remember Aria, then she probably can't remember Dr. Harrington either. But even if she is, "so what if she is?" Amy said while knowing the question failed to convince Petrie that she no longer cares. It's hard not to feel anything especially now knowing who her exes are. They're all intelligent, beautiful, capable, and dangerous especially Aria who is willing to do what many women would not have done just to get revenge just like Petrie who doesn't think that way now but what she's thinking is still hard to figure out. Why are we walking around this place? "What are we doing here?" Everything she said can be said in New York.

"Does this place look familiar?"

The building there is a psychiatric hospital. This is New Jersey. There are lots of trees and lots of open space. It's nice here but why would she think I've been here before? "no"

"You sure? Take a look around."

If Blake were here, she would be cursing right now. "I am hungry and I'm getting very tired of this so please get to the point." She did and she has a good reason for not allowing Blake and ZJ tag along. It's because they don't need to. It's because less people in the helicopter would be better under this current environment. It's because they wouldn't be able to help but they would agree.

"Is she crazy?" ZJ said after learning why Amy didn't want to say anything after coming back. It's not just because she's tired and hungry.

"That's what they do, when they can't find the killer, they pick someone who has a motive, so they picked you." Blake said, wondering why she's still looking at the pictures in the laptop. Does she really think she could've killed them? Killing someone while sleepwalking is not unheard of. Killing someone and then not remembering how it happened is an excuse that many have used before but it can happen but in her case, that's not possible. "Isn't that" Blake didn't continue since ZJ just asked a question. He's dead too?

"She doesn't think you killed him too, does she?" ZJ interrupted while knowing that Blake must be thinking of the same thing since this no longer makes sense. There are more than just pictures of Washington, Lattimore, and Isaac, whoever he is and pictures of men and women. This one is a picture of the asshole.

"suicide, he got cancer but she thinks someone did it" Amy said while keeping her eyes at the laptop.

"Ohh shit." Blake said.

Oh shit indeed. It is shocking. Petrie wasn't shocked by it though since the last time she saw him, he was acting like a madman after getting the termination notice. The damage he did would've killed many if that steel urchin-like object contains explosives. He may have found out there was nothing special in it but the casualties that occurred under his management had already been leaked, hence the reason for his termination. Some say it was guilt, fear of repercussions and fear of slowly dying in pain from cancer that led him to make that decision but Petrie thinks otherwise since she once saw him arguing with the scientists in a demeaning manner. It might not be them since he didn't have a good working relationship with many others. Anyone could have killed him. It could even be me. She didn't say that but she probably thinks it's possible since I have a reason to.

"Who's that?" ZJ asked since Amy is looking at this one longer than the others.

"Doctor Neeva Poland. She's missing."

"Ohh, what does her disappearance have to do with you?" Blake asked, now knowing that not all of these people are dead.

"because she knows this guy." Amy said after clicking on the mouse to go to the next picture. "Dr. Zegler. He's dead too. I don't know who he is but for some reason, she thinks I do." Blake is cursing again. That's because it doesn't make sense. That's because she doesn't know my real identity. It's also because she doesn't know what else Petrie said. Petrie didn't say I'm responsible but that doesn't mean that never crossed her mind since the point of going to the psychiatric hospital was to see if I remember being there and to inform me of the possible effects of brainwashing which sounded absolutely ridiculous even after she gave examples of what's happening now.

Brainwashing aka mind control is a term used to describe cult members because they believe everything their leader says no matter how illogical it is and would do anything their leader asks including self-sacrifice and killing. Nowadays, this word can be heard frequently on tv, in the news, and online by millions of people to describe all those who supports the narcissistic, bigoted, immoral, kleptocratic, racist, sexist, greedy, orange conman. Those people are naïve, ignorant and willing according to Petrie. If Aunt Erin heard the way she described her boss's boss, they would have a lot to talk about. She's right but what does that have to do with me? It took her awhile to get to the point not just because she was talking slowly but also because she had a lot to say about mind control which sounded like she got it from sci-fi movies but she's right about some things. I was brainwashed and I have been feeling more tired than usual but that doesn't mean I went out to kill when everyone else is sleeping!

"now her, I know, what does she have to do with this?" Blake asked while wondering if she is just thinking not looking at the website since the question seems to have startled her.

"I'm just looking at the news. That just popped up by itself." That's not a lie but not the entire truth. Was just going to search for Dr. Zegler and there it was, a picture of Hans appeared on the default website with other news but the finger just uncontrollably clicked on it because the mind just can't help thinking about

"She's trending, her new album just came out."

"oh" Okay. Blake doesn't suspect anything. It's time to do something else before she does. "I'm going to sleep. Can you send it to Anthony?" ZJ will know what to do. It's only 7 but the brain is too tired to answer any other questions that Blake might have. And she's probably waiting for the right moment to ask since she's the type that won't quit asking until she gets a logical answer. If she knows about my memory loss incident, she'd probably think Petrie's accusation is possible so there's no need to tell her and there's no need for her to know who's calling either.

"Is it him?" Blake asked, wondering if it's her husband or his lawyer. Maybe it's her lawyer?

Part 2 - 09/21/22

It's not Lucy. Of course it wouldn't be because she knows there's nothing she can say to change how I feel. It's just Kat, calling to get clarification of the bunch of pictures that I sent her but that's not all she called about. She called as a concerned friend because she just realized six months have passed. She called for the same reason as Aunt Erin did on Thanksgiving day. It's not strange to be apart on Thanksgiving day. A lot of families did that. There's a pandemic. She called because Grace is getting worried like everyone else and wants to know when Lucy will be back. I don't know but just because I don't know doesn't mean nobody knows where she is.

"What do you mean you don't know? Did something happened?"

Something did happened but you don't need to know. "Tell Grace not to worry. She's just busy. Can you look thru those for me? It's urgent." Adding the last 2 words didn't stop Kat from acting like Aunt Erin. Why is she giving advice when she doesn't even have a boyfriend?

"You know you can tell me anything. I will always be on your side."

No, you won't. You would agree with her. Alexis would too. Nadia might but she would forgive her. Janet might not but she wouldn't be the right person to talk. Max would be. Max would understand how I feel. Max would agree; Lucy crossed the line this time.

Kat finally got the hint to stop asking and ended the call with one good news. She's right. The vaccine for the virus has finally been approved and will be distributed next week. There's no need to wait though. I already got the shot. Having connections with high ranking government officials does have its perks but where the hell is Petrie when I need her?!

...few days later...

"Where are you?" Amy said while putting the phone against her ear but again got a dial tone. Waiting for Petrie to call back isn't the only option but like ZJ said, where can we look? Blake didn't say where she went. Her phone is shut off. Am I overthinking this? Why is she so calm? "Do you know where she could be? Does she have any relatives? Did she say she's having problems with something? Does she have any friends we can call?" Those are good questions so what's that look for?

"yes"

Yes? To which part.

"If you don't know her by now, she's getting bored."

"what?" Amy asked because she wasn't expecting that. "Did she say she wanted to quit?"

"No, but I think she's thinking about it."

That's not good news but it's understandable. ZJ seems to be tired of this too. When the mind is bored, it doesn't work that well especially for someone who's used to going out and doing something other than looking online all day which must have affected her brain cells because the old ZJ wouldn't think there is nothing wrong even if Blake is taking one week off and this is only the 4th day because there's no reason for Blake to not pick up the phone! "I really think there is something wrong."

"If you don't know her by now, she's"

Whatever ZJ's thinking of saying, it can wait. The phone call is more important. It could be Blake. It's not but the call is urgent. This isn't the time to ask for more information because that can be done later. Now it's more important to get out of the apartment as told but "Why are we going up?" Shouldn't we be going down? If Blake were here, she would be cursing right now because ZJ is not answering the question and instead giving orders like she's in charge again. Climbing five flights of stairs isn't difficult but there's five more. We'll not be able to beat those using the elevator no matter how fast we're hopping these stairs. It's good to see ZJ back to her old energetic self again but is this really a good idea to go up on the rooftop? Wouldn't it be easier to just pull the fire alarm? Everyone will be out. It will create chaos. It will buy us time. "Wait" ZJ didn't wait which is very stupid of her because she would've been hurt if there is someone waiting behind that door. No one else is on the rooftop so that's good. No one would be crazy to be up here at this time of the night even if the view is nice. Taking the coat is a good idea but coming up is here not. ZJ is using the chair to block the door but how is that going to hold? They might have guns. This is New York. They definitely have guns. Hope they don't have AR-15. What is she looking for? This isn't a five floor apartment building. There's no fire escape ladder. It's impossible to see downstairs. It's too high and too dark. "Let's just go back in, if we pull the fire alarm, then"

"no, just wait."

"Wait for what? You don't think they'll come up?" That's possible but unlikely if they have all the entrances and exits blocked.

"Get those."

If Blake were here, she would say this is stupid. Moving the table and stacking up all the lounge chairs against the door will not prevent them from coming thru and will only let them know we're here. "Who are they?" Amy said as she grabbed another chair. That's not a stupid question. Knowing who they are might help. She's calling so that means she doesn't know but it might be too late because a noise just appeared behind the door.

"Go hide." ZJ said in a whisper.

Now that's just stupid. Hide where? Behind the table or the plants or in the darkness and hope they won't notice? "What are you going to do?" Amy asked while knowing that is a stupid question because ZJ is pointing the gun at the door.

"Just go."

She's behaving more and more like Lucy. She's preparing to sacrifice herself. Even if she doesn't have anyone, this is not worth dying for! "I'm going to call the cops."

"They are the cops."

"What?"

"Jesus Christ, just"

The next few words would have been swear words if ZJ had continued. No more questions are needed to know why ZJ was ordered to go on the rooftop. The sound of the helicopter can be heard. It might be coming but the time that it will take to get here is going to be too late. The door is slowly opening.

Amy hid behind the cement pot of plant and aimed the gun at the door while hoping no one gets hurt and hoping this has nothing to do with Blake.