Unfortunately for Yunyun, Smiley the Troll had to be relocated, as a full grown mountain troll wasn't the sort of thing you just left wandering around a campus full of children.
Yes, even Hogwarts has standards.
Still, with Megumin and her companions (sans Yunyun) occupied in detention for at least two weeks, the campus stayed relatively quiet. The Third Floor Dungeon went tragically unexplored as the prospective adventures toiled away at a variety of tasks that were becoming increasingly difficult to engineer. Professors were overheard remarking that they had "Potter minding duty", which included scrubbing, washing, cleaning, and other tasks.
"T-The house e-elves aren't very happy with you," Yunyun told Megumin one afternoon. The five of them were out on the lawn, studying for an upcoming charms test. As they did so, they zapped the occasional oversized frogs that were hopping around. Most had buried themselves as soon as the first snowfall had happened, but some of the larger ones were still active.
"T-They say y-you're being greedy and t-taking all their chores," Yunyun explained, levitating a frog out over the waters of the lake and letting it fall in
"They can HAVE the chores!" Megumin complained, sending bits of frog flying with a well placed blasting charm. "I don't even want to-"
"Did you say elves?" Hermione asked, perking up immediately. She quickly dispatched her frog with a severing charm. "I didn't know there were elves here!"
"Oh, um, y-yes, they normally do the c-chores," Yunyun explained. "You know. W-when people don't have so many detentions."
"What kind of elves are they, exactly? Are they more Tolkienesque, or the traditional fairy sort?" Hermione demanded.
"Or Keebler," Megumin added.
"Keebler?" Hermione asked, frowning in confusion.
"You know, the kind that makes cookies. I would approve of that sort of elf," Megumin said with a nod.
"House elves are just servants," Darkness explained. She had given up using magic, and was crushing frogs with a large tree branch she had found. Or, well, trying to. Her aim was pretty bad. "They do chores and mind houses for wizards. They can make cookies from what I hear, but we don't have one. Grandmama says that doing chores builds character."
"Then we're going to have the best bloody characters in the whole world," Ron grumbled, sending another frog flying with a levitation charm. "If the house elves want my detentions they can have them."
"W-well, they seem to think that you all want to be house elves," Yunyun told the others, frowning at how many dead amphibians were scattered about. "N-Nipsy says that you should s-share more chores though."
"Hmph. Well, we don't actually have detention tonight," Megumin said, aiming another explosion. "So obviously that means-"
"Can we please try to not end up with another week's worth of detentions so soon?" Ron pleaded, grabbing Megumin's wand and pointing it away from the direction of the castle.
"Ron, we cannot give up! We must overcome this obstacle! The first step, however, is further training," Darkness said with a nod, finally managing to bash a frog. "Last time, those diabolical traps were our undoing. We shall have to be better prepared."
"We need a rogue," Megumin opined. "Someone with the Detect Traps skill."
"Well, there are spells that would let us do that," Hermione mused. "We could just study those."
"I hope you lot are going to clean that up!" Filch shouted at them, walking by with a wheelbarrow of half frozen dead amphibians. "Blasted animals! You're raining bits of them everywhere! Damn imported species. Hagrid should know better."
Filch stomped off, but Megumin grinned. "So, Hagrid is the one responsible for the frog! I bet he knows how to get past it!"
Later, the five students trooped down to Hagrid's hut, where he seemed pleased to see them.
"Afternoon, Yunyun. And what do I owe the pleasure o' the rest o' yeh comin' teh pay me a visit?" Hagrid inquired. "Thanks fer takin' care o' the extra frogs. Didn't realize Kermit was female."
"You named the giant frog Kermit?" Hermione asked as she took a seat on the floor. "I thought wizards didn't get the telly."
"What's a telly got teh do with anything? It's just what Wiz told me the frog's name was. 'Course she was just a tadpole back then, poor thing. Cooped up in there. I still can't reckon how she managed to lay her eggs in the lake."
"Well, perhaps we could bring her a treat," Megumin suggested. "What does she like to eat? Not flies I assume."
"Nah, they're too small, yeh see. At her size I suppose a goat or a nice sheep would do her right proper," Hagrid said with a shrug. He took the kettle off, pouring mugs all around. Halfway through, he paused, considering. "Wait. How do yeh know about Kermit the Frog?"
"He's on the Muppet Show with Miss Piggy," Hermione explained. "I quite liked the Star Wars episode."
"H-he plays banjo," Yunyun added.
"Banjo? Now that would be a sight to see," Hagrid mused. "I don't suppose I could teach Kermit how teh play…"
"Well, how do you disable the traps on the door?" Megumin prompted. "We could go in and try. Every frog should learn to play 'Rainbow Connection.'"
"Oh, it's dead easy. Yeh just knock in a special pattern with yer wand. I use me umbrella, but it's all the same," Hagrid explained, and then tapped out "Shave and a Haircut."
"Ah, that makes sense," Megumin nodded sagely. "I don't suppose you're a rogue?"
"N-no, H-Hagrid is more of a ranger," Yunyun explained. "H-he has an animal companion, and a crossbow."
"What I am is the Keeper 'o the Keys and Grounds," Hagrid said, frowning. "Wait. Are you lot tryin' teh trick me?"
"Would Yunyun ever trick a friend?" Hermione asked, patting Hagrid on the leg.
"Well, I suppose not," Hagrid agreed. He singularly failed to notice Yunyun blushing and looking terribly guilty.
Meanwhile, Kazuma and his crew of Adventurers were not standing idle. Or at least, Dust wasn't. Kazuma and Draco were perfectly content being idle. "Guys, guys, you'll never believe what I found!" Dust gasped, jumping into the Slytherin dorms.
"Something to do with dragons," Kazuma said without looking up from his textbook, which he had been assiduously studying for quite some time.
"Stop reading those muggle things and listen!" Dust said, jerking the comic book tucked in the textbook out of Kazuma's hands.
"HEY!" Kazuma gasped, desperately scrambling for the copy of Action Comics. "You don't know what I had to do to get that!"
Draco looked up from his own (actual) studying. He spied Kazuma desperately hiding away the comic book, and a slow, malicious grin spread over Draco's face. If his hair had been able to curl, he would have looked exactly like the Grinch.
"So that's what you needed your own house elf for," Draco sneered, already imagining how he could use this to blackmail Kazuma.
"Shut up. I'm...studying the enemies' ways. So I can...destroy them more easily," Kazuma snapped, stuffing the book under his blankets. "Now, er, what was it, Dust?"
"I found a dragon egg!" Dust cried. "You have to help me get it! It's trapped and I can't get it out."
"Ugh, no, dragons are beastly things," Draco declared, making a sour face.
Kazuma, however, perked up. "Hey...dragon eggs are rare. They have to be worth a load of galleons."
"I don't want to sell it, I want to hatch it!" Dust declared. "Come on, guys!"
With the prospect of valuable loot, Kazuma and Draco hurried after Dust through the castle.
"So. Muggle books. What did you learn?" Draco taunted as they went.
"I learned sixty different ways of kicking your arse," Kazuma snapped.
"Yes, but they're muggle ways. Those hardly work against-"
Kazuma pinned Draco to the wall, lifting the other boy off his feet by his robe and glaring up at him. "Look. Superman is NOT a muggle. His name is Kal El and he's a kryptonian from the planet Krypton and he's freaking awesome. He can fly without a broom, lift up cars and toss them around like a giant, freeze things with his breath, and shoot blasting charms out of his eyes."
"Does he shoot lightning out of his arse?" Draco chuckled, apparently unthreatened.
"THOSE HAVE BEEN RETCONED! SUPERMAN RED/BLUE NEVER HAPPENED!" Kazuma snarled, shaking Draco roughly. "SUPERMAN IS THE GREATEST SUPERHERO EVER AND-"
Apparently fed up, Draco drew his wand and pointed at Kazuma."Petrificus Totalus."
Naturally, Kazuma immediately locked up and fell over backwards. What Draco did not factor into account was that since Kazuma was propping him up and had a death grip on him, he was then suplexed head first into the ground, which knocked him silly.
When Draco's head stopped spinning a few moments later, he found Kazuma glaring down at him, with a confused looking Dust hovering over them. "Guys, come on, stop fighting! There's a dragon egg!"
Draco got up and followed along, but couldn't resist a muttered "Muggle lover."
"I'm not the one who saved Dursley's life and is her friend now," Kazuma shot back.
"I...that was...that was…an accident!" Draco sputtered.
Kazuma paused and slowly turned, giving Draco a malicious grin. "Oh? Do you want me to tell Yunyun you're not her friend?"
"Let's not get any ideas now, Kazuma, we have a dragon egg to find!" Draco said hastily and hurried to catch up with Dust.
At last, in a long abandoned classroom, they found what Dust had discovered: A large mirror.
"Seriously? Is this some sort of practical joke?" Kazuma sighed.
"No, come on, check it out! My reflection is normal, but I'm totally holding a dragon egg!" Dust explained, motioning them over. "Look! I just have to figure out how to get the egg out of the mirror."
It says something about wizarding logic that the idea of objects trapped in a mirror was not completely alien to the boys. Kazuma glanced in the mirror, then gasped and ran up to the surface. "That's not a dragon egg, that's a copy of Action Comics #1! I'm rich!"
"What? No! Get away!" Dust ordered, and dragged Kazuma back.
"Huh." Kazuma paused, frowning at the mirror when Dust moved him back. "That's weird."
"What's weird?" Dust demanded, turning around. "Can you see her too?"
"Her who?" Draco asked, stretching to look in the mirror himself. "You mean my mother?"
"What? No! It's Megumin! Well, and Longbottom, and some blue haired chick." Kazuma considered the mirror. "I think it's Aqua Mizu, actually."
"No, it's a woman with a raccoon tail. She's writing something," Dust explained. He frowned at the mirror. "Well, I can't read that, it's backwards!"
"I just see me and my parents," Draco said, stepping forward. He smiled and nodded. "I'm head boy! My father is shaking my hand, and my mother looks very proud! And I've got the House and Quidditch Cups!"
"You're nuts," Kazuma told him. He scratched his head. "I'm just standing there reading comics with those three girls. I have no idea why. Wait...now I'm taking out something weird. It's not in English, but the cover has a kid in an orange jumpsuit riding a dragon on it."
"Hold up, the girl in mine fixed what she wrote," Dust said. "It says, 'Sorry I was mad at you, I'll see you next go around. Have fun, and don't do anything perverted.' Huh? What does that mean?"
"You two are barmy," Draco sniffed. "Obviously the mirror here shows my future."
"Yeah, no. What's the name of the mirror, dummy?" Kazuma demanded, pointing to the name above the glass.
"Erised?" Dust read. "Never heard of it."
"No, idiot. It's a mirror. Come on!" Kazuma complained.
"The Mirror of Erised? Obviously a forgotten artifact," Draco commented. He noticed the inscription, then read, 'Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi.' Well that's just nonsense."
"No, it's not! Ugh, a mirror!" Kazuma waved his arms, but the other two looked at him with blank expressions. "You read it BACKWARDS! It's the Mirror of Desire!"
"Oh," both said. Draco nodded.
Dust shook his head. "I don't get it."
"Things are backwards in a mirror," Draco said smugly, as though he'd been the one to figure it out. "So it says, er…"
"I show not your face but your heart's desire," Kazuma said, running out of patience. "But it's obviously broken. I totally don't want to be around those two, and I don't even like Mizu's music."
"Then why do you have all her records?" Dust asked.
Kazuma blushed. "That's not the point! Look, Dust, there's no dragon egg. Or a weird girl who writes you messages."
"Well, she just wrote that 'Don't you dare let the PedoNEET steer you wrong, Dust.' What's a pedoNEET?"
"You have some real weird desires, Dust," Draco scoffed. "At least I want something normal."
"What, for mummy and daddy to be proud of you? Grow up," Kazuma said with a derisive snort.
"At least my parents are fond of me, unlike yours. Muggle lover," Draco taunted.
"I swear to the goddesses, I will kick your arse, Draco," Kazuma snarled, raising a fist.
"Well, don't insult my family," Draco huffed. He glanced wistfully at the mirror. "You sure it doesn't show the future?"
"Well it would be nice if it does, I like the girl! Her tail is cute," Dust opined. His face fell. "Oh, she's leaving, it's just me with the dragon egg now. She wrote something about 'planning for that big job in Western coming up.' What's that even mean?"
"It means your heart is even dumber than your head," Kazuma sighed. "Come on, this is a complete waste of our time."
The three boys trooped off, leaving the mirror behind them.
Once the door was shut, the air shimmered, and Albus Dumbledore appeared, tucking an invisibility cloak under his arm. "Curious. Most curious." He turned back to the mirror, where he could see himself, Gellert, and Ariane, together as they had been as young people. "I shall have to ensure young Miss Potter and Miss Dursley find the mirror. I had planned to move it soon, but…"
Dumbledore's breath caught as something else flitted through the background of the image he could see. It was just a dark shape in the mist, but…
He stepped forward, frowning slightly. For a moment, two red eyes glowed in the mist, then vanished. It was just his younger self, his long dead sister, and Gellert. Yes. He would most certainly need to ensure Miss Potter found this mirror before performing the ritual.
The next day at breakfast, Dumbledore announced: "We will be remodelling the classrooms on the 4th Floor on the left hand side. During this time, the area will be quite hazardous, and all students are forbidden from entering. The area in question will be easily marked off with ropes, to make certain that everyone is aware. This is to help us complete the repairs to the pipes we have been having problems with."
Five seconds later, Megumin, Hermione, and Darkness were planning on how to infiltrate the 4th Floor Corridor on the Left Hand Side, while Ron wondered just how many more nights they were going to spend in detention.
Naturally, that afternoon, the five of them snuck out of History of Magic. Or rather, they just walked out together, because Binns didn't pay attention to who was and wasn't in his class after he'd taken attendance. A few minutes later, they were in the cordoned off section of the 4th Floor, and two minutes after that, they had found the Mirror.
"The Mirror of Desire?" Hermione said, frowning at it. "Interesting. So, we have to look into it to see what we truly desire?"
"Hmm. This sounds like a trap. I have read of cursed mirrors," Megumin mused. Then she shoved Ron hard enough to send him stumbling in front of the glass.
"Bloody hell! What if it had eaten me or something?" Ron cried angrily, glaring over his shoulder.
"Then I would have avenged you. What do you see?" Megumin demanded.
Ron turned around, then gasped. "Oh bloody brilliant! I'm quidditch team captain! And Chris is there, giving me her trophy for greatest seeker ever! My family is all applauding, even Percy!"
"What? Really?" Megumin darted forward, peering over Ron's shoulder. "What? That's not what I see at all."
"Obviously. Your heart's desire is different from Ron's," Hermione sniffed.
"I knew that! Hmm. Well, that's odd. I recognize me and Yunyun, but there's someone else in the mirror," Megumin said, frowning at her reflection.
"W-who?" Yunyun asked, stepping forward.
"Well, I'm standing with you, atop a mountain of our slain foes, but there's another girl there with us. She's younger, but she's obviously a Crimson Demon. She's got red eyes and everything," Megumin observed. Then she gasped in delight. "I'm casting a spell! Oh, I can tell, this is going to be-"
There was a flash from the mirror, and Megumin began to cackle. "AHAHAHAHA! Yes! The greatest Explosion of all time SHALL BE MINE!"
"Well that's not disturbing or anything," Ron muttered.
"Ha! All now pay homage to me!" Megumin declared, nodding in satisfaction. "You are all there, as is Kazutrash, and...hmmm."
"What is it?" Ron asked, blinking at the mirror. "I saw that flash. Weird. But now my image is back to normal."
"Well, there is someone I recognize, but have not met. She is the singer who is not-so famous. The one with the blue hair," Megumin explained.
"I-I see her too!" Yunyun gasped. "You're there, and s-so are all my friends! W-we're at a birthday party, for me! There's c-cake, and ice cream, and we're all taking and- oh it's wonderful!"
Then Yunyun paused. "B-but, there's someone sitting between us. S-she's a little girl, but she's a Crimson Demon too. A-and for some reason, Mr. Vanir is standing behind her. T-they haven't got hats though."
Yunyun waited a beat, then nodded. "W-well, they just put on the hats and smiled at me, so they must be my friends!"
"Can I see?" Darkness asked, coming forward slightly.
"Hmph, fine," Megumin agreed, and she and Yunyun stepped aside.
Darkness blinked at the image, then suddenly went beet red, flushing from the tip of her ears to her neck. She hastily covered her eyes and whirled around. "I-it's broken for me! I-I didn't-"
Then she ran out of the room, slamming the door behind herself.
"Is something wrong?" Hermione asked. She peered into the mirror. "I just see myself with an enormous library, and all the professors applauding along with you lot."
"Hmm, I think this mirror is a trap of some sort," Megumin said. She nodded and turned around. "Let's go find Darkness. I do not think we should spend much time looking at it. We should not become distracted from our goals."
"Suits me," Ron said with a shrug. The four of them headed out, where they needed to take half an hour to talk Darkness out of the nearest lavatory, after which she flatly refused to speak about what she had seen.
Back in the room however, Dumbledore was stepping forward to the mirror. His image was the same as always, and he pondered just what everything meant. He turned away to leave, having long ago realized the trap the mirror held.
There was a tapping sound behind him, as if someone were rapping their knuckles on glass.
Slowly, Dumbledore turned. He beheld in the mirror the image of a young girl with burning red eyes, dressed in a worn dress, with a star ornament in her hair. The child smiled at him, and waved in a timid fashion.
"Hello," Dumbledore said, slowly taking a step towards the mirror. The girl looked exactly as he imagined Megumin would have when she was just starting Primary School. "And who might you be?"
The girl shrugged, and beckoned Dumbledore closer.
"I think not," the headmaster said with a slow shake of his head.
The girl sighed, then reached into her pocket. She plucked out a glowing red gem.
Dumbledore took a step back, his hand going to his chest. "What on Earth?"
He blinked, and the girl was gone.
Still, Dumbledore was disturbed. It did not take him long to check upon where the Stone was hidden, easily bypassing each of the obstacles. It was where he had left it, and Dumbledore picked it up and made sure.
"Curiouser and curiouser," Dumbledore mused. He placed the Stone back inside of the puzzle he had erected, and reset it. He considered his construction, and made a decision.