I screwed up. This is the real chapter 78.
The day of the Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff game arrived on a crisp February day. Ron was still deemed too frail to play, though his mother had gone home, much to his relief. He would be sitting in the teacher's box behind Hermione, "taking notes for the Hogwarts Gazette" so he wouldn't be all crammed with the uncouth masses. Hermione and Daphne had their set up, ready to do what they did best.
"Ready to get ourselves banned from the job?" Hermione asked.
"Let's go out in glory," said Daphne, switching on the megaphone.
Hermione played an upbeat song while everyone filed into the stands. Once she was sure enough had come in, she leaned forward and put on her best announcers voice. It sounded American, but as long as she didn't stutter, she didn't care how she sounded.
"Good morning everyone, it is a very bright and windy day for Quidditch. I'm Nia "Statler" Sanchez and beside me is Daphne "Waldorf" Greengrass. Today's game is brought to you by Deedee's Used Weapons and Barbecue. If Deedee can't kill it, it's immortal."
Daphne snorted and clunked her head against the desk before composing herself.
"We've been having quite a few reserves play this season, haven't we?"
"We sure have. Good thing, too. I remember when a team was out of luck if they had no reserves to play for them. Now the rules have changed a little to even add in-game reserves. Something I think we, as students, started doing and nobody really told us not to and so we just kept doing it."
"I think you're right," said Daphne. "Hufflepuff will not be using any reserves as of right now, but Gryffindor will be."
"That's right, in place of Ronald "Won-Won" Weasley—"
"Hey!" Ron protested.
"—we have his reserve Cormac "Baby Carrot" McLaggen, who will wish he never met me."
"I think most people wish that, Nia."
"Fair enough. And here are the teams marching out onto the Pitch! We've got Hufflepuff Captain Zacharias Smith, who was once a reserve himself! Hopefully he has learned how to play nice with others or this whole match might turn out into one-man shows airing at the same time."
"Look at him strut," said Daphne. "I haven't seen a strut like that since Duckie still owned peacocks. Do you think he's earned his confidence?"
"Well, Hufflepuff has been playing fairly well this season, not as good as two seasons back, but now they're going up against Basilisk Slayer and she's been an unstoppable force. Their Keeper is good, but not quite the immovable object Esperanza was. Still, I think they have a chance if Gryffindor can prevent any infighting. The Captains are shaking hands, surprised Baby Carrot hasn't vultured in on that, and they're off."
"Smith got the Quaffle first," said Daphne. "Lucky in Quidditch not in dates. Oh no, he fumbled, not lucky in Quidditch either."
Hermione played the sad trombone sound effect. "Basilisk Slayer got the Quaffle. Some people may wonder if I'm biased against my friends and the answer is 'only the cool ones'. Uh-oh Cadwallader has gotten the Quaffle back. He's really close to the rings, he shoots and… he scores because Baby Carrot is too busy mansplaining Quidditch to a girl who's being scouted by professional teams."
"Come on Baby Carrot, get your head in the game!" said Daphne, giving the points to Hufflepuff. "Potter sure doesn't look happy. Let's hope that he can Seek as well as he can yell."
Harry glared at them and went off in search of the snitch. The game proceeded with Hufflepuff scoring more than Gryffindor due to McLaggen's inability to stop bossing the team around for more than five minutes.
"Seventy-forty Hufflepuff," said Hermione. "Baby Carrot, Smith's coming up with the Quaffle. He's been fumbling a lot this game, probably because he slammed his fingers in his trunk and doesn't want anyone to know. Heading to the left."
"You can do it," said Daphne like she was encouraging an infant to stand up.
"Oh, here comes a bludger and OW!"
McLaggen drifted to the ground and doubled over, though he had stopped the Quaffle this time.
"Oh, he is down," said Hermione. "Not only was there a self-sacrifice on this play, but the sacrifice of future generations. He went all out for his team, saving the ball right here and losing two in the process."
"Miss Granger!" Professor McGonagall gasped.
Gwenog Jones and Ron fell against each other in stitches. The other teachers looked like they were trying not to encourage her. Not that she needed encouragement.
"Let us have a moment of silence for this man's fallen brothers. Not only taking one for the team, he took two. He went balls out, which is not saying much but they don't call him Baby Carrot for nothing. It appears as though he has recovered. He is returning to the air, rather than the goal posts, he's taking a bat from Beater Peakes. And may I say nobody beats it like you do. Here comes a bludger."
"DUCK!" Daphne yelled and the two girls hit the deck as the bludger slammed into the bleachers. Thankfully the teachers had moved out of the way, but there was now a crater in the stands. "This game is nuts!"
Hermione grinned and settled back into her seat. "Too right there, Daph. Sorry, McLaggen, seems like you struck out once again."
"Don't worry," said Daphne. "We're keeping a personal score with you. Hint: We're winning."
"Even so, Gryffindor gets a penalty play thanks to your small sacrifice."
Cormac was furiously red and returned to the goals, though Hermione was sure if his words had reached them he would spend the rest of his life in detention.
"Miss Granger, Miss Greengrass, please try to show a bit of decency," said Professor McGonagall.
"Decency? I haven't been decent in years!" said Hermione.
"I just mean you're making fools of the players."
"They don't need our help," the girls chorused, and she sighed haplessly.
The game didn't improve much from there with in-fighting from both teams. Hermione and Daphne made sure to help as little as possible. Especially during penalty shots.
"Remember when the Hufflepuff Team used to be attractive?" Hermione asked.
"I do, what do you think happened?" Daphne replied.
"I guess Smith wanted to be the best looking one on the team."
"That can't be it."
"Why do you say that?"
"He's got a full team."
Hermione and Daphne shrieked with laughter while the penalty shot was missed.
"If you keep this up, neither of you will be getting dates!" Smith yelled.
"Promise?"
Harry shot up into the sky with his hand outstretched.
"Oh look, Potter cleaned his glasses and is chasing the snitch," said Daphne.
"Guess Baby Carrot's got nothing more to sing about."
"Did you see that Bludger he took? He's the new lead soprano of the Frog Choir."
"Harry caught the snitch and Gryffindor won 170 to 130," said Hermione. "That's our game. If you'd like you can stay behind, we'll commentate the brawl that's about to go down."
"They'll never let us announce again," said Daphne.
"They never should have let us start."
While Madam Hooch got between Harry and McLaggen, Hermione switched off the megaphone and packed up her case.
"You two are hilarious," said Gwenog. "I don't think I'd be able to stay on my broom with you two announcing."
"Glad you thought we were funny," said Daphne. "What did you think of Ginny?"
"Oh, she's great. I'm going to invite her to train with the Holyhead Harpies over the summer. It was a bad game, but she really kept her cool. If a bloke talked to me like Baby Carrot, I would have put a bludger through his head."
"Well, she'll be stoked to hear that," said Hermione. "Why don't we go down to the changing rooms so you can talk to her?"
"Yeah, that'd be great."
Hermione looked at Professor McGonagall. "Sorry, ma'am. But what have the teachers been doing about those awful rumors he's been spreading? Don't tell me you haven't heard them."
"Mr. McLaggen will receive due punishment," she said. "But I can't abide that sort of behavior. Two detentions. House-elves. You may serve them during your free periods this week."
"Yes, ma'am."
"See you inside, Nia," said Daphne.
"I'll go with you," said Ron to Hermione.
The three of them went down to the changing rooms where Harry and McLaggen could still be heard arguing. Hermione pushed the door open with her foot and clapped slowly.
"Brilliant match," she said. "Absolute catastrophe. Basilisk Slayer, you remember Gwenog."
"How'd you get the name Basilisk Slayer?" Gwenog asked.
"Killed one," said Ginny off-handedly, which seemed to impress Gwenog even more.
"Wicked. Listen, the Holyhead Harpies have a summer program where you learn to train with the big leagues, see if you've got the stuff. I want you in the program." She looked at Demelza and Katie. "You two've got spirit. You can come too, I bet there are teams just waiting to snap you up."
"Really?" Ginny squeaked.
"Hm… I wonder if Char would want to give that a go," Hermione mused.
"Who's Char?" asked Gwenog.
"My girlfriend."
Gwenog seemed really happy about that simple declaration.
"When's she playing next?"
"Ravenclaw vs. Slytherin, Second Saturday of April."
"I'll send someone to scout her out." Gwenog turned to Ginny. "What d'you say?"
"That'd be brilliant!" said Ginny, vibrating with energy. "I'll have to talk to my mum about it, but I'm sure it'll be fine."
"Do other teams do this or is it just a Holyhead Harpies thing?" Hermione asked. "I mean, when Viktor was playing for us his coach invited my… friend to play for the Sofia Lions as a Swing."
"Swings are a common position to start out in," said Gwenog. "I think a few teams have summer programs, but they usually get them through junior Quidditch."
"I did that," said Cormac.
"Hm, clearly you never left," said Hermione.
Gwenog snorted and clapped her on the shoulder. "Let me know if you ever want tickets to a game or a sponsor for S.A.M.B., Nia. I like your style."
"Thanks. I'll take you up on that."
"I've got to get going, but you ladies just send your responses through Sluggy and they'll bypass the fanmail." She waved. "See you 'round."
Hermione grinned and looked at Ginny, who broke into excited giggles, jumping around the changing room. Had Ron not gotten between them, she wouldn't have noticed Cormac storming towards her.
"Back off!" Ron growled.
Cormac shoved him aside and stuck his finger in Hermione's face.
"You motormouth bitch!" he spat.
"Ooh, never heard that one before," said Hermione, trying not to flinch at the insult.
"Now I'm going to look like an idiot in front of everyone!"
"You did that the minute you thought you could be Captain!" said Harry.
"Stay out of it, Potter!"
"What's the problem, McLaggen?" said Hermione. "Everybody wants to know the details of our little rendezvous. Or will you finally admit that it didn't actually happen?"
"It doesn't matter if it did or not at this point," he sneered. "People will believe anything about you. You think you finally reached popularity? You're just fooling yourself and everyone else. It's only a matter of time before they all realize what a sad loser you really are. In the end, you'll only have your stupid pamphlets."
"Wow… you got any other quotes from a teen movie or did you waste your brain power on that?"
"UP YOURS!"
"You first." Hermione rubbed her temple. "Harry, remind me why I came back?"
"So we wouldn't have a repeat of Cedric?"
"That's right." Hermione paced around the room. "You wanna spread rumors Baby Carrot, you go right ahead. The important people will always know the truth. Just remember that I am more vicious than you are and I'm not afraid of perpetuating the rumors if it means I get to drag you down with me, because I know that if it isn't me, you'll hurt the reputation of someone with thinner skin."
"Oh, whatever. Girls are so sensitive."
"If the boot fits, Baby Carrot."
"You calling me a girl?"
"You called me one!"
His eye twitched. "I'll tell everyone what a freak you are."
"Everyone already knows that," she said. "Where have you been? Too busy stroking your own ego?"
He rushed towards her and she shrank to an otter so he punched the locker.
"Impedimenta!" Harry yelled.
Hermione hurried out of the way.
"I'm gonna go for a swim," she said. "If Char comes looking for me will you tell her?"
"You got it," said Ginny, drawing her own wand. "Don't worry about Baby Carrot here. I'll show him what happens when you don't respect women."
"Cool." Hermione looked at Ron. "Feel better about your own skills?"
"Yeah," he said. "I think we'll win easy once I'm back in the game."
"You said it," said Harry, still looking at McLaggen angrily.
Hermione scampered away and went down to the lake. If she could cry in this form, she would have. She hated being treated like this. When all this was over, she was going to go home and never ever come back.
You're only here to help Harry, she told herself as she dove into the water of the lake. Once all the horcruxes are gone, you're off the hook and you can go home.
She corkscrewed through the water and surfaced to take a deep breath before diving back down. It was by no means quiet in the water, but it was more peaceful than the surface.
Ariel didn't know what she was talking about. Land sucks. Water is where it's at.
"Kee kyah!"
Two merpeople appeared around her and she stopped swimming to look at them. One dropped her trident, which remained tethered to her waist and reached out, patting Hermione on the head. The two chittered to each other, probably gushing over how cute she was. Or maybe they were trying to decide if she was food. The other mermaid hugged her and rubbed her cheek against Hermione's. It was the former.
Air. Hermione wriggled out of her grasp and shot towards the surface, breathing deeply and then floating onto her back. The two mermaids followed, keeping only their eyes above the surface. They watched her with gleeful interest, so she dove back under. One dove with her and started making bubble rings for her to somersault through while the other hurried off. At first Hermione thought she was bored until she came back with friends.
The merpeople chattered excitedly and played with her. She juggled rocks for them and swam through bubble rings, and when she got tired and wanted to float on the surface, they swam around singing beautiful songs. As the sun drifted lower, Hermione figured she better get to the castle before she was presumed drowned.
"Kee?"
Hermione looked at her mermaid friend. "Well… bye."
She could have laughed at her look of shock as she shot towards the surface. Sitting on the end of the docks was Char, reading a book. Hermione climbed up the post and landed on the wood with a splat, making her scream in surprise.
Hermione turned back to herself.
"Hey, been waiting long?" she asked and settled next to her girlfriend.
"Well, I got a good start on my book," she said. "How was your swim?"
"Fun. I played with the merpeople. They've never seen an otter before I guess."
"That sounds interesting."
"It was." Hermione looked at her. "Everything alright?"
"Just angry," she said. "For McLaggen's behavior. You seem to have gotten him back though. Everyone's calling him Baby Carrot now."
"I'd almost stopped thinking about that," said Hermione. "How does the school nerd also get the reputation of being the school slut?"
"Same way Cleopatra did?"
"Makes sense." Hermione folded her hands in her lap and watched the sun sink lower in the sky.
"Ginny told me what you did."
"Which bit?"
"Asking a scout to come to our game in April."
"Are you alright with it?" said Hermione. "I don't want to put any pressure on you. You did say you weren't sure what you wanted to do and I thought maybe getting in there like an internship might help."
"I've noticed you're a fix-it person," said Char. "I'm okay with this, but you know you don't have to plan things out for me just because I said I was unsure."
"I'm sorry."
"It's okay." Char took her hand. "I'll figure it out on my own. Don't worry about me."
Hermione stared out at the water.
"What's it going to take Char?" she asked. "To get people to respect me?"
"Life is always going to be harder for people like us," she said. "In the wizard or muggle world."
"I can't stand it." Hermione laid on her back and stared up at the sky. "I'm exhausted. Sometimes I wish I could sleep for a hundred years."
"All students, please return inside for curfew," Professor McGonagall's voice echoed across the grounds.
Hermione sighed and got to her feet.
"Do you want to do something?" Char asked. "I make a mean brownie."
"Brownies sound good."
As they headed inside, Hermione shrieked when an arrow whizzed between them and landed in the ground. They looked to the tree line to see a centaur stomp her hooves and return to the forest.
"They could have killed us!" Char panted.
"Nah, their archery skills are too good," said Hermione, pulling the arrow out of the ground to find a message. The arrow was still in good condition, so she slid it into her belt and opened the note.
To the Activist,
Presently, it would not be safe for you to come to the centaur camp. We appreciate the gifts you have sent with Firenze. We will allow him to travel freely between our camp and Hogwarts. Perhaps when things are able to change we can revisit it, but for now we just want to prevent further restrictions on our territory.
Sincerely,
The Centaur Camp
Hermione clicked her tongue to her teeth and sighed.
"If Hogwarts actually allowed Magical Beings to attend the school, this would be so much easier."
"Don't they?" said Char.
"Not in any way that matters. Werewolves are allowed, but typically only if they keep it a secret. There are a few with M.B. ancestry, but as they 'pass', so to speak, and as long as they keep quiet, then there's no need for them to look for support." Hermione took a deep breath and shook her head. "I can't do anything about it until I reach the state level."
"Why even worry about it, then?"
Hermione tried not to read too deep into that statement. "It's important, Char. If I ease up and stop talking about it, then people are going to think it's a vanity project and make a fake change just to shut me up."
"Is there anything we can do?" Char asked. "Anything I can do to help?"
A smile spread and Hermione threw her arms around her and kissed her cheek.
"I have a couple more documentaries coming in," she said. "Maybe you can help me spread the word about them? I was thinking of turning it into an event. Collect donations and petition signatures. You know, the centaurs in Brazil are taking well to the arrangement with Castelobruxo, but to retaliate some members of government are pushing in on land rights again. The money helps buy lawyers and the petition shows that people notice what's going on."
"I think I can help with that," said Char. "Would it bother you if I use my feminine wiles to collect signatures?"
"As long as you don't call it feminine wiles again."
She giggled and wrapped an arm around Hermione.
"You got it, babe."