Chapter 41: Start of a brand new mess.
"Thank you for watching the Library." Tomas croaked as he hobbled towards the door "The keys to lock up are on the desk. My old age is starting to catch up with me it seems." the old man chuckled to himself as one of the guards opened the door for him. "I will see you in the morning, young Goetia." he said in parting as he left the library.
"Indeed." Goetia replied back in his usual tone, then frowned.
Being repeatedly called young by an individual he no doubt was older than by a considerable margin was starting to trouble him. As if the essence of being called 'young' was somehow dismissive, akin to an ignorant child. The age of his physical body aside, his mind was still three thousand years old making him neither ignorant nor a child. Although he couldn't exactly make an attempt to correct it as of late.
It was an annoyance but not one that was particularly pressing on his mind.
He turned back towards the shelves and made ready to order them again, at the very least Tomas had seemed to spend more time in the library which meant he was burdened with fewer duties.
At any rate, he still had a job he had to…
He stopped walking, his eyes slowly shifted to his right side and to the table directly in front of the nearest shelf. It currently had only one occupant, although what they were doing was hardly something he could ignore.
Turning his whole body towards the individual, he silently crept across the library in their direction before coming to a halt on the opposite end of the desk and stared down.
The familiar mop of ginger hair lay face first on the table, the owner slumped over as well in a clear display of unconsciousness. The manner in which they had used an open book as a pillow showed that they clearly hadn't been planning on sleeping, he stared at their sleeping body in silence for a few moments. The only sound to be heard was the gentle breathing of the girl barely loud enough for him to pick up.
He'd seen the girl enter the library at the start of the day and recognised her as one of Byleth's students. Annette, he believed her name was. Either Byleth had granted her special dispensation to study in the library, or the girl had managed to absorb herself so thoroughly in her studying that she had completely managed to overlook the simple fact she had lessons.
Regardless of either option, the fact remained that he could not leave her like this. If only because he would eventually have to lock the library and the potential of her dribbling on the books would ruin them.
"Awaken." He spoke in a louder than average tone, the ginger girl jolted. Snapping up and into their chair with wide eyes.
"Bwah!" Annette gasped out in shock, looking around wildly before she exhaled and looked to Goetia "Y-yes?...wait…" she widened her eyes, a flash of anxiousness danced across them "I...I didn't fall asleep, did I?"
"You did."
"Oh no!" She exclaimed, her hands moving up to cradle her head "Come on self, you've got to be better than that!" her hands fell and she stared at Goetia "How long?"
"I am currently two hours away from locking the library." Goetia explained "It is currently six in the afternoon."
The girl's face turned ashen "I-I missed…"
"The entire day? Yes, you did." He nodded his head, then looked down at the book she had been reading "Were you given the privilege of being allowed to avoid classes for the day?"
"No." She squeaked.
"...I see." Goetia nodded his head "That is unfortunate then."
"Oh dear...oh no…" She quietly whimpered to herself "Oh self, you've really stepped in it this time. You came here to study and fell asleep and then missed an entire day of classes? Oh no…" she then realised something "Did anyone come to see if I was here?"
"No." Goetia shook his head "Although I have not seen any other members of the Blue Lions class for the day. I assumed it was a class activity."
"And I missed it?" Annette's face filled with horror "Oh no...I can't even remember what it was I was studying!"
Red eyes drifted to the book in front of her. He would never normally care what it was she was reading in the least. He held no affiliation with her at all and he needn't bother himself further with concerns towards her own misgivings about sleeping.
With that said, however, he was hard pressed to find something he could actually do. If nothing else, it was still within his duty as an assistant librarian to aid in the progress of the students, with a mental command he flipped the book around and dragged it across the table towards himself before raising it into the air.
Annette was curious at what point in time she found herself no longer surprised by the librarian doing crazy stuff. She'd seen him do such things on occasion and the training they had taken part in as a class against him was still present in her mind. Considering the ease at which he had been able to defeat them.
"The art of Black Magic by Grand Mage Theodore Peters." His expression flattened "A lofty title for a simpleton." He lowered the book back to the table, ignoring the surprised expression he got from Annette at the blatant dismissal of the man "The man makes base deductions which he propagates as grand discoveries of the world of magic."
Annette continued to stare at him.
"His self-proclaimed status as a 'Grand Mage' aside, his skill in the art of Anima based magic-"
"Anima?" Annette blinked in confusion, Goetia paused and looked to her.
"Black Magic is based upon one's intellect to discern the circles used for casting." Goetia explained "In essence, it is a magic based upon the reason of the individual. In another word, Anima. The essence of the person itself. One such scholar once proclaimed, 'I think, therefore I am.' De Anima, means of the Soul. If the essence of a human is based upon reason, then magic which is powered by intellect is effectively magic based upon the soul. Therefore, Anima Magic."
"Oh…" Annette nodded her head "Is that true?"
"The Soul is intricate to the being of man itself, therefore magic which is crafted via intellect can be effectively said to be a projection of the soul." Goetia paused "However, the same can be said of all magecraft. I am just aware of more appropriate types of magecraft to be referred to as 'black magic' than the ability to conjure a simple fireball."
"It does sound less menacing, right?" Annette nodded her head sagely "Like Dark Magic…" she shivered "Although that isn't practised as much, but Lysithea and Hubert both use it...although I don't know of anyone else." the girl stared at Goetia expectantly "Do you have another name for Dark Magic?"
"It is simply curse based."
"...That's not less threatening."
"The entire school of magic is designed around the principle of causing the victim death, it is purely offensive." Goetia remarked "In truth, most of the early spells are the accumulation of toxic chemicals from the atmosphere supercharged with magical energy and then haphazardly thrown towards a target. A crude but effective method of killing someone, although such spells would be more effective in a less hospitable location."
"The atmo-what?" Annette tilted her head in confusion, giving the perfect impression of a lost puppy. "And kemical?"
Goetia opened his mouth, then paused, slowly closing it again. "It is irrelevant." he eventually replied, then looked down at the book "For the time being, and in accordance with my role, I will recommend you books by more talented mages." he remarked as he turned away from the ginger girl and paced over to the desk, sweeping out a quill and parchment before writing down several names and books.
Nodding to himself, Goetia turned back around and walked back to Annette's table, sliding the parchment over to her "These individuals provided a more comprehensive explanation of the school of magic. They are of passing skill for Fodlan mages."
Annette wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a backhanded compliment for them or an insult towards their skill that these were apparently 'passing' mages. She'd heard that Theodore Peters had been a prominent mage for decades and was one of the most respected names in the school of Black Magic, so for him to be called an idiot was a little…
She wasn't sure how she was supposed to feel about it, considering she'd used his own works as study material for years now. Her eyes wandered to the list in front of her "A-alright!" she nodded her head resolutely, giving Goetia a determined nod "I'll get right on this, thank you very much!"
Her stomach rumbled.
The pair stared at eachother in silence, even as her face lit up to match her hair colour.
"You have been here since the beginning of the day and have missed the assigned lunch hour." Goetia commented, nodding towards the door "Aside from that, you missed an entire day of lessons. I would advise you to first make some manner of apology towards your peers and Professor, and then ensure you do not also miss the dinner hour of the cafeteria."
The girl mutely nodded her head, pocketing the list of names and shuffling towards the door while trying not to look as embarrassed as she felt.
Goetia watched as she departed before turning his attention back to the main desk and moving towards it. There was not real reason why he had spoken to the girl at all. She was just there and in truth he just felt like it. A spur of the moment decision to break up the monotony of his day thus far, as he circled around the back of the desk and sat himself down he heard the latch of the door open and the girl make a surprised squeak.
"P-pr-professor!" Goetia looked up, seeing Byleth stood in the open doorway and staring down at the girl "I-"
"You did not attend today's lessons." Byleth frowned, the girl looked down at her feet "I have asked Mercedes to make a copy of the lesson notes for you. You have also been assigned additional training hours for tomorrow's practice to make up for your missing hours. Do not do this again, it will hamper your learning."
"Yes, Professor!" The girl virtually stood to attention and shouted out before darting past the woman "I am so sorry!" she apologised as she fled down the hallway, Byleth watched her leave before her attention turned back towards Goetia. The woman's lips pursed as he continued to stare blankly in her direction.
She took a deep breath and then made to take a single step forwards-
"Excuse me, Professor Byleth?" She paused, turning her head to stare at the Knight who stopped her "If I might check, are you here to use the Library facilities or to visit Assistant Archivist Goetia?"
She stared at him. "...The latter." She answered, then tilted her head slightly "Why?"
The man gave her a patient smile "It is just our orders, we are to document anyone Assistant Archivist Goetia speaks with and report it to the Archbishop. We won't ask what you intend to discuss, only that you spoke with him." he assured her "We will leave you to it."
She continued to stare at him.
"Documenting our conversations?" Sothis curled her lip in distaste "This Archbishop truly is quite the control freak if that is the case." a sigh escaped her throat. "In any event, we should speak with Goetia quickly...any longer and I fear it might make the situation worse for him." the girl's eyes turned downwards "...I truly did not imagine that it would turn out like this."
Byleth hummed once in affirmation and steadily strode towards Goetia, the man continued to stare blankly in her direction as she approached. He said not a word, even as she stopped directly in front of his desk and stared down at him.
Byleth remained silent for a few moments before she opened her mouth.
"If you seek to apologise, do not bother." He cut her off before she could even speak "There is nothing to apologise over. You have no influence over my actions and you should not be conceited into believing otherwise. I accepted your request with the full knowledge of the consequences that would await me."
Sothis stared at him, frowning "I am still going to apologise."
"It isn't necessary."
"That is for me to decide, isn't it." She scoffed, then took in a deep breath "I...am sorry that helping us cost you your freedom here at the Monastery."
"…" His eyes slowly turned to her "...It was my choice to help. I admit your argument played a minor role in forming the outcome, but it remained my choice."
"Which wouldn't have happened if we did not bring the case before you and argue for it." Sothis pointed out "I shall simply say that while I am glad none died unjustly...I am sorry you were treated as such."
"You have no control over the Archbishops actions either-"
"For the love of-!" Sothis growled, throwing her hands up and floating down directly into Goetia's face "I'm sorry you can't spend time with Lysithea!"
That actually managed to keep him silent that time, the man's expression twitched slightly before it settled into a frown to match Sothis "Is this some attempt to alleviate your own ill-begotten guilt over the belief you somehow-"
"You are the worst at accepting apologies!" Sothis exclaimed out in irritation, her hands grappling with her hair "The worst! You are without a shadow of a doubt, the most childish, annoying and-"
"And you are ignorant, naive and factually useless." Goetia replied back, staring back at her as the girl froze mid-sentence, fixing him with a look of momentary surprise.
"Wha-you-I-!" She sputtered, then her eyes burned "I….You know what?" she floated back, smirking down at him "I will be the bigger person here. I won't let you try and goad me into a violent reaction." the rage in her eyes cooled into one of smugness "Well? How will you respond to that?"
"I will assume that this marks your attempt at an apology as a failure." He replied, leaning back into his chair and staring at her.
Sothis expression froze, she blinked twice.
The girl remained silent for a few moments.
Then disappeared.
Byleth winced a few moments later, as if she had heard a loud noise of some sort.
Goetia watched her reaction before he deduced the very simple conclusion that Sothis had decided to retreat into Byleth's head just to scream out her frustrations.
"...She's upset." Byleth dully remarked, her expression shifting back into its blank form although there was a slight hint of discomfort from the sudden noise which had echoed around her skull earlier. "Sorry about the lessons."
"Like I said, you have no influence over my actions." Goetia dismissed "Everything that occurred was of my own volition, therefore all consequences that followed are of my own making. You have no reason to feel responsible for any of my actions." he paused, tilting his head "Was that all you needed?"
She remained silent, then turned to look over her shoulder at the guards who were both still standing stationary at the door before she turned back around. The girl leaned over the desk with her voice dropping into a whisper "I think the Archbishop has been giving me preferential treatment."
"...You have noticed this...recently?" He asked in a slow voice, making sure to speak out so that she could understand. Byleth frowned as she got the distinct impression he might have been mocking her.
Or he was genuinely curious as to if she had only just noticed the treatment she had received.
Either or.
"Yes." She replied "I should have also been punished for aiding you as well."
"But you were not and this concerns you." Goetia replied, then shrugged "I doubt there is an individual in the Monastery who is not aware of the preferential treatment you have received. Although most will not question it and will defer their judgement to the Archbishop." he paused "And what do you intend to do about it?"
"...My father was suspicious of the Archbishop." She quietly whispered back "He also kept me poorly informed of the Church of Seiros as a whole. I think there was a reason for it."
"So you intend to ask him." Goetia surmised, slowly nodding his head "I doubt he will have all the answers, but he will likely have some. I assume recent events have spurred this sudden course of action."
She nodded once.
"Very well." He replied "And you will seek to inform me of the answers you have received?"
"Yes."
"Why, might I ask?" He tilted his head, eyes narrowing in intrigue "Surely it is no concern of mine why the Archbishop seems to view you with a certain degree of bias? And do you not value your privacy?"
Byleth remained silent, her eyes flickered downwards slightly. Why was she so intent on keeping Goetia informed as to her own personal life? He was smart and wasn't as taken in with personal opinions as the Church was.
It was not like her Father was in the Monastery at all times and it wasn't professional for her to discuss her personal life with her students – Seteth had explained that to her after he caught her doing so with Sylvain and his love life once – and she didn't view Seteth as the time of person she could seek advice from yet.
There was Sothis, but that didn't really count as the girl was as mysterious as they came.
The answer was surprisingly simple.
She valued Goetia's advice. He wouldn't lie to her, or if he had she'd never noticed. The simple truth was that Goetia was smart enough to deduce things and honest enough to explain them how they were to the best of his ability.
Not to mention the fact that he had been there when she was recruited by the Monastery, combined with all the secrets they shared – Sothis in her head and him not being human – it seemed wrong not to include him in future discussions.
"I…" She opened her mouth to speak, then slowly closed it "...I want your advice."
She wasn't quite prepared for the genuine look of surprise which flashed across his face before it tapered out into a more confused one. His lips thinned and his brows furrowed as he scanned her expression.
"You...seek my advice for your personal mysteries."
"Yes." She decided, giving a resolute nod "I do."
"...I see." He muttered "Very well...I...if that is your reasoning." He sounded slightly unsure but didn't seem to want to express it further "And your resident spirit."
"Is more curious as to the preferential treatment." Sothis muttered as she reformed herself "And – quite frankly – you are the only person in this entire Monastery the two of us are truly able to brainstorm with. My mind cannot make sense of the puzzles before me and her skill is better aimed at displays of violence." she nodded her head over at Byleth.
"It's true." Byleth admitted without so much as flickering her expression "I'm still confused by all of this."
"...So you defer yourself to my external opinion to make sense of the puzzle before you." He tapped away at the table "...I have suspicions of my own but I cannot truly confirm them as of yet. Despite how likely they are." Goetia admitted "But very well, if you believe Jeralt will give you more details as to why the Archbishop favours you so, you may speak with him."
Byleth nodded, rising up.
"One more detail." She paused as Goetia stopped her "There is one thing I find curious, I have read most religious texts in this library-" his face shifted with mild discomfort before it evened out "-and curiously enough, there is no mention of the Goddesses name within any of the texts."
Byleth blinked "Maybe she doesn't have one?"
"A God with no name?" Goetia mused "Not improbable, many Gods and Goddesses remain nameless despite their authorities being utilised by their successors, however I do not believe this to be the case. In any event, I would ask that you seek an answer from Jeralt. Given his history with the Monastery and as the former Captain of the Knights, I suspect he might be able to shed light on this particular mystery."
Sothis frowned at him "You want us to ask him the name of the Goddess?" the girl titled her head "Why?"
Goetia's eyes drifted to her "...It will confirm a suspicion of mine." he replied without giving much more detail "That is all."
"Hmm...I see no harm in it." Sothis shrugged her shoulders, looking to Byleth "What of you?"
Byleth paused, mulling it over in her head before she nodded "Cannot hurt to ask."
"Very well." Sothis agreed, turning to Goetia "We shall do this favour of yours, in truth it was something that was puzzling me as well."
"Oh?" Goetia raised an eyebrow at her.
"Indeed." Sothis frowned "It is referred to as the Church of Seiros and yet Seiros is the name of the founder and not the Goddess, would it not be more logical to refer to the Church as one which worships its Patron Deity?"
"Not at all." Goetia replied "I am aware of dozens of religions which are named after their founders or figures of importance rather than their God or Gods."
"Oh." Sothis blinked "Perhaps it is just me then."
"Perhaps." Goetia shrugged "Regardless, we have discussed all we needed to." he looked back at his desk "If there is nothing else?"
"No." Byleth shook her head "...Bye."
"Farewell."
"I would say that conversation went well." Sothis mused aloud as they walked out of the Library and made a right to move through the corridor, making their way to the office where her father would be. "It will take us relatively little time to determine what your father is aware of and then ask about the Goddesses name." she paused. "Although quite why Goetia is curious enough to ask the question puzzles me."
"Maybe he's just interested." Byleth explained away as she ventured further through the corridor "...Are you still mad about the apolo-"
"Yes." Sothis answered immediately "I believe he acted that way specifically to annoy me." the girl grumbled and crossed her arms "I am trying to make amends and he decides to completely ignore my efforts and then insult me!"
"You insulted him first-"
"He goaded me into it!" Sothis indignantly exclaimed "...He can be very troublesome when he wants to be…" the girl trailed off, releasing a tired sigh to finish up "But I suppose that is simply how he is."
"Yes, that i-" She cut herself off as she entered the hallway and saw that the door to her father's office was open. She blinked in surprise and swiftly moved through the hallway towards it, finding the interior of the office completely exposed.
Poking her head inside, she quickly discovered that her Father was not present in the least.
However, there was a person inside that she did not recognise.
She stood in the doorway and made to speak out before the man turned around.
He had a slightly aged face with shoulder length brown hair, his robes were more complicated than the other Monks present at the monastery, however they were a dark colour with crimson highlights along the shoulder and chest. The man blinked in surprise at seeing her before his expression softened slightly.
"Were you also looking for Jeralt?" He questioned, she nodded once and the man released an understanding hum "I confess that I was as well. Although it appears I have just missed him."
She frowned "Missed?"
"Ah, I suppose not everyone would have heard yet." He reasoned, nodding his head and giving a troubled frown "In truth, it still surprises myself to hear it. As you have no doubt heard, the Western Church was behind that unfortunate incident last month with the Rite of Rebirth, so the Knight's have been dispatched to help deal with it. As short staffed as they are at present, it appears Jeralt was dispatched with them."
Byleth frowned "He...didn't tell me."
The man paused, searching her expression with a curious look before his eyes widened "I see…" then his face shifted into a welcoming smile "You are the newest Professor I have heard about then, the daughter of Captain Jeralt."
Byleth nodded her head.
"Yes, I suspect he would have wanted to inform you before he left." The man released a chuckle "Unfortunately it was rather sudden, I myself had hoped to catch him before he left, we have not seen each other in years and I wanted to say 'Hello' but...it seems it will have to wait until he and the Knight's return from the Western Church."
The man shook his head, returning his focus to Byleth "I believe I have failed to remember my manners." he took a single step forwards and extended his hand "I am Aelfric, I was asked to return to the Monastery by the Archbishop during these troubling times although I am never too far from it." he admitted with a smile that indicated he knew more than he was letting on.
Byleth stared at the hand and then reached out her own to clasp it "Byleth." She introduced herself.
Aelfric's expression froze for a half second "Bel...eth?" he voiced out, his tone distant and almost dazed.
"Byleth." She repeated, she'd never heard it pronounced quite like that before.
"Byleth...yes, forgive me for pronouncing it incorrectly." Aelfric apologized as they shook hands and broke contact "I'm not sure what came over me." the man gave a forlorn sigh "Dear me, you must excuse me. As much as I would wish to continue our talk, the Archbishop requested that I visit her as soon as I arrived in the Monastery." he gave a wry chuckle "Although I couldn't help myself when I heard Jeralt had returned...it seems nostalgia got the better of me."
Byleth remained silent, something Aelfric seemed to find amusing as he stared at her.
"You're quite lost with my relationship with your father." He said "We're old friends, I would be happy to speak with you later should time allow, but I would hate to distract you from your studies." he moved past her "Goodbye, Byleth." nodding to her, he made for the door "I do hope we meet again."
"Bye." She waved as he left, the man closing the door behind himself. Her hand fell back to her side and her eyes turned downwards.
"Drat." Sothis cursed "Just as we were attempting to discern a mystery...this is most unfortunate timing."
Byleth nodded her head in agreement, it would have to have been during her lessons with the Blue Lions otherwise she suspected he would have at least attempted to leave a messa-
She paused as she noticed something pinned on the back of the door, she approached the parchment and stared at it.
Sorry to run out on you, kid.
Rhea wants me to help the Knight's with this Western Church trouble, it probably won't take long but don't let your guard down while I'm not there to back you up.
I'll be back in a couple of weeks, so just be careful while I'm gone and don't cause any trouble!
She pulled the note down and thinned her lips. It was certainly very sudden then. She'd heard about the Western Church from Dimitri this morning, he'd overheard Rhea giving out the punishments for the officials they had caught who had a hand in the chaos. Apparently Rhea could be quite harsh when she wanted to be.
It did mean there wouldn't be anyone she could ask about the Archbishop's favour for the time being, however. Which was unfortunate to say the least.
"No matter." Sothis dismissed "We shall simply have to wait until your Father returns, for the meantime you should focus on seeing to the teaching of your students. There are still threats beyond them and perhaps even us that we need to better account for." she then made a face like she'd sucked a lemon "Goetia is also...correct that my current capabilities are not...quite...as good as they might be."
Byleth stared at her blankly for a few moments "...So Goetia is right that you're not very helpful right now-"
"I am very Helpful!"
Aelfric rubbed the bridge of his nose as his head pounded. That was a strange reaction, it was the first time he'd ever heard the name and he went with that manner of pronouncing it. There was also the odd sense of Deja vu he had, the man shook his head.
She did look so much like her mother.
The thought brought a pleasant smile to his face, she would be back soon.
He would bring back SITRI and then all would be well again.
That was all that mattered. She would not be dead anymore.
His expression tapered out into a more composed one as he approached the Archbishop's chambers. From what he had heard, she'd been drummed up into a frenzy as of late. Not that he entirely blamed her, the actions of the Western Church were of great surprise to himself as well.
It changed nothing though.
Sitri was dead and gone because of that woman, not even in the grave they were supposed to have buried her in. It was wrong.
He would play the part of a loyal Cardinal until such a time as was no longer necessary.
Passing through the chamber doors, he made his way to Seteth's office, he was asked to report to him first. Although he was curious what else had happened to the Monastery in his months away. His time in Abyss distracted him from the news of the surface.
"I'm telling you, it is the strangest thing." Harold continued to argue "I walked by it just the other day, it's around the back of the Monastery. Last week, it was a tiny hole and this week when I passed it again-"
"It grew." The other Knight loudly sighed in exasperation "I heard you the first time, look some parts of the Monastery are old, doesn't surprise me that you get a couple sections in need of repair." the man then shrugged "Who knows, might have even been damaged by some rowdy students."
Harold frowned "You don't actually think that some of the students would willingly damage the Monastery, do you?"
"How should I know?" The man frowned "None of the Nobles, but some of those kids are from those...less respectable backgrounds." he scoffed "Probably one of those Golden Deer scoundrels, they got a few of the common ones in there. You know what they're like when it comes to respecting rules."
"Just like all the other students." It was Harold's turn to frown "It could have just as easily been one of the Noble kids getting careless."
"Really?" The knight scoffed dismissively "Sure, whatever you say."
"...So did you hear there's a rotor for the guards to sign up for duty to watch Goetia?" Harold changed the subject "Weird, I didn't think he needed watching."
"I think it doesn't matter at all." The man sighed, the pair moving off "Whatever he's doing should have been watched to begin with, I heard he was even getting the opportunity to speak with the students and try and teach them. As if they need someone filling their heads with a load of nonsense, I tell you…"
The conversation of the pair died off as they moved further along in their patrol.
Neither noticed themselves being shadowed until the figure stepped out into the open from behind a nearby bush. Claude watched the two leave, his expression thoughtful before it turned away from them.
"A growing hole in the Monastery, huh…" He muttered aloud before he shrugged "May as well have a look." he smiled, striding off down the opposite direction of the Knight's "Worst that could happen?"
AN: We're kicking off our time in the Abyss guys!
Also, whether Goetia has noticed it or not, his boredom is literally driving him to make any excuse to speak with people. Even if its just to insult their reading materials.
Unfortunately Jeralt is out and that means answers will have to wait.
Damn...on the other hand, when he gets back it's going to be more interesting!
Omake: Finding Talent I
"This is perhaps the strangest idea you have ever brought before me." Seteth bluntly put as he stared at Claude before his eyes narrowed "And if this is another attempt to put Goetia in a maid dress, so help me-"
"I promise, it isn't that!" Claude hastily raised his hands in surrender at the scowl on Seteth's face "...But that was pretty funny, right?"
"...Not in the least." Seteth scowled, then looked down at his table "...I fear it awakened something in Flayn...I am concerned about her sudden interest in literature. Much seems to include...dubious content."
Claude blinked once "Not where I saw this going, but okay." he shrugged "Still, with how everyone is feeling right now, can you actually say this is a bad idea?"
"Yes." Seteth nodded his head instantly "I can. A talent show? Really?" the man sighed and slumped in his head "What manner of talents would you even be able to bring out?"
"I'm sure we can think of something." Claude dismissed, waving his hand "That's why this is a talent show after all." he mischievously smiled, resting his hands on Seteth's desk "Come on...what's the worst that-" he paused "I'm going to stop myself there before I say anything else."
"That is likely for the best." Seteth agreed "Assuming I did allow this to go ahead, you would be the one to assemble your talent. I will make no effort to do so."
"Seteth, Seteth, Seteth." Claude shook his head, smiling the entire time "Just leave everything to me, you have nothing to worry about."
"Now I find myself very worried."
"Which is why I have gathered you all here!" Claude announced as he waved his hand at the assembled crowd in the Golden Deer classroom, he himself stood atop the teachers desk while giving his welcoming speech "So...who has any talents they feel comfortable showing the rest of the Monastery."
The room remained silent before the red-headed womaniser from the Blue Lions spoke up "I mean if you consider my charm as a talent-"
"Okay, so Sylvain has nothing." Ingrid politely interrupted him with an amused smile, which only grew when the boy's expression faltered "How terrible."
"You go right for the throat, don't you?" Sylvain winced, shaking his head "...I can juggle?"
"So you can act like a street clown." Felix scoffed "How appropriate."
"Wha-" Sylvain sputtered "You're the one who taught me to juggle in the first place!"
The boy remained silent for several seconds before he replied in a strained voice "...I have no memory of such an event."
"You spent weeks teaching me!" Sylvain argued further "Even your dad called you the best juggler he's ever seen!"
"That idiot!" Felix hissed, looking down at his feet before he noticed the smiles he was getting from everyone around him "What? If you're looking for talent, look at her." he raised his hand and pointed off into the crowd.
"M-me!?" Annette froze "W-what do you mean?"
"Don't act so humble." Felix scoffed, "You're a talented singer."
"So we have Felix as a juggler and Annette as a singer." Claude nodded his head, turning to a chalkboard which happened to be present "This is looking very promising already."
"I never agreed to this!" Annette whined "I don't want to sing!"
"We're Nobles." Claude gave her an unforgiving smile "We're not allowed to do the things we actually want to do."
"Speak for yourself." Lorenz huffed "I for one look at my position with a great deal of-"
"So Lorenz wants to be a stuck-up jackass." Leonie surmised "Surprising no one."
"...Well, I never!"
"I can throw knives." Leonie offered with a shrug "I can also do a couple flips if you want."
Claude blinked at her "I didn't know you were that flexible."
Leonie smirked "I can be as flexible as I want to be. Captain Jeralt taught me that." she turned about the room "You hear that Professor Eisner! Captain Jeralt taught me to be flexible! I bet I'm more flexible than you!"
Byleth stared at her from across the classroom with a blank face.
"...Alright then." Claude shrugged, "Leonie can do some...gymnastics." he shrugged "I guess?" the boy wrote it down "What about the Teachers, you guys got anything?"
"I have a very good party trick-" Manuela started, only for Hanneman to interrupt her.
"Manuela, this is no time for your inappropriate jokes." The man rattled out with a tired tone of voice "I doubt you will find any more luck in securing yourself a husband at a talent show than you will in scouring the taverns for blind drunk men like the hyena you are."
"...Maybe Hanneman should sit this event out." Manuela gave a smile which was anything but kind. "With how old he is, I fear that perhaps a loud noise might give him a heart attack."
"Now listen here-"
"Moving on!" Claude loudly cut the pair off, although he looked more than amused at their reactions "Thea, I'm just putting you down for singing as well-"
"Really?" Dorothea tilted her head "How can you be sure I didn't want to do something else?" she queried, tilting her head "Like dancing?"
Claude stared at her, then bit his lip to try and hide his obvious smile. Dorothea immediately recognised her mistake as mirth flooded Claude's features. "Wai-!"
"I'm sure we can try and arrange to get a pole into the hall." Claude got out between chuckles "Although it will certainly prove a hit with the students, I'm not so sure about that Knights."
Dorothea snapped her jaw shut and shook her head at Claude, the boy could already see she was awaiting her revenge for that little jab. It was totally worth it though. Judging by the now intrigued expression on Edelgard's face, she also thought it would be worth it was well.
"What about a pie eating contest!" Raphael shouted out "Does winning those count as a Talent?"
"...Not Raf, pie eating is not a talent."
The boy frowned, then paused and raised his hand.
"A meat eating contest is not a talent either."
The hand was lowered again.
"Why not put his highness up to this as well?" Felix raised his hand and gestured to the Prince "Considering how much people enjoy watching dancing animals."
"...That was a clever insult Felix." Dimitri nodded his head "And I would like to also point out I cannot dance, and if you put me down for it Claude, I will be most unhappy."
"I wouldn't dream of it!" Claude shook his head, turning to the board and writing out Dimitri's name "I'll put you down for hoop jumping."
"...It seems that I cannot win."
"What about you Teach?" Claude turned to the woman "You got a special talent?"
Byleth froze, her eyes shifted with a thoughtful hue to them before she spoke out "I once crushed a watermelon with my thighs."
"...We found our winner guys!" Sylvain shouted out, standing out amongst the ground and pointing to Byleth "We found her!" then looked for another individual "Hey, Goetia!"
"Hm?" The sparkly haired man looked towards the student.
Sylvain gave him a thumbs up "I hope you don't die, but if you do, that is the best way to go out!"
Goetia frowned "...Having my skull cave in is the best way to die?"
"...Nevermind." Sylvain shook his head in disappointment.
Claude was still staring at the woman in silence before he wrote down her name and her special talent. "Okay...I would personally love to see that. Do we have a melon we can use?"
"We can always use Sylvain's head." Ingrid volunteered him "Considering how much he seems to enjoy the idea."
"Sandwiched between two thighs?" Sylvain smirked "Like a dream come true."
"If you have a wish to have your skull crushed, I can always do so right now." Goetia blandly called out from across the room "It would not take an ounce of effort on my part."
"...On second thought, I'll sit this one out."
"Charming." Claude nodded his head "...We're really getting one heck of a Talent show here, aren't we?" the man chuckled "What about you, Sparkles? You got any special talents?"
Goetia stared back at him "...No."
"Come on!" Claude whined "There must be something!"
"There isn't."
"I'll just put you down for 'secret talent' then." Claude chuckled as he wrote down Goetia's name "It's going to be great, anyone else?"
"Oh, oh!" Flayn waved her hand at the back "Put me down for dancing!"
Claude's expression froze. "...What kind of dancing?"
"Well, obviously I can't show it now." Flayn dismissed "It is supposed to be a place where we show our talents, I do not wish to spoil the surprise!"
"...You're not going to need the pole, are you?"
"Well...probably not." Flayn admitted "Do you think I should have it there any-"
""""NO!""""" The entire hall shouted out in horror.