!GO PHILLIES!

[a/n0]On an unrelated topic; Movies Channel ran a string of post-apocalyptic B&W movies from the 50s, one that I caught the last minutes of. In it, there's a group preparing a survival plan complete with bunker and eugenics program for the kids. The Twilight Zonish ending has them locking down while the camera pans to showing life at the beach carry on as normal. Ring a bell with anyone?

[a/n]This in honor of Robbie Coltrane. Didn't find much on cause beyond severe pain of arthritis and an unspecified long illness. In doing a little research for this, HPWiki lists the friendly giant's vitals as 11'6" & 289lbs. A BMI calculator told me this is (!Severe thinness!). That seems to be Robbie's actual weight. To get the same BMI, Hagrid would weigh 950lbs.

Harry Does Different CDLXXIIIb

Hagrid's Hearing

"Settling in well, Kingsley?" the even newer Auror casually greeted the recently confirmed permanent official.

To this, the towering man gave a frown "I'd rather my old job back."

"Move it! Come on ya ruddy oaf!" this came from the far end of the command office. It was followed by an assortment of things crashing and banging. Eventually, a trio of stunning spells ended the altercation.

Harry had interposed himself between the Minister for Magic and possible danger, but both ran towards the now quiet scene. Seeing who was sprawled across a bench, he lashed out with a spell that hit, not the unconscious prisoner, but rather his coworker "Idiot! Williamson! That's Hagrid!"

Abcij

"Awwwmihd" groaned the single occupant of a magically enlarged bed.

This awakened the Auror who insisted on keeping sole watch over the [officially] violent troublemaker. He merely opened his eyes and said "Morning, Hagrid. I read the report, what you were arrested for. Probably true …from Williamson's perspective… wanna explain what really happened?"

"Ye've no idea Arry!" the half-giant complained while shaking his head and trying to put his beard in some kind of order "Was olding a Seventh Year class on Skrewts. Ya member mi 'brella? Hadta protect the wee boy from getting'urt."

To this, Harry nodded "And of course, you used your …ahhh… umbrella. And, from a strictly look out for the student point of view, it makes perfect sense. Too bad it reminded everyone of what Dumbledore managed to get forgotten."

"Ye're shouldna speak ill o'the dead Arry." Hagrid complained as he sat up.

Waving it away, the younger man countered "Great man. I agree. Fact is he had 50 years to clear it up proper. He didn't. Now it's back to bite you in the arse. So we do. Too bad he's not here to fix it with a twinkle. Anyway, I've brought in a couple heavy hitters. We'll get you out of this mess."

Abcij

"All rise! The Honorable Doris Crockford presiding." Announced the bailiff. Harry raised an eyebrow it the vaguely familiar name, but dismissed it.

The late-middle-aged witch took her seat at the bench, sucked deeply on her pipe, then addressed the assembly "We take judicial notice of a particularly noted citizen in the person of Harry Potter. The defendant, also, is quite noted for his long service to Hogwarts. A reason for my assignment to this case is that little of my education overlaps Mr. Hagrid's presence. Mr. Prosecutor? Proceed."

"Your Honor, Jacob Selwyn for the Ministry." He was a less than impressive sight, short and rather effeminate, though his voice expressed competence "We see this as particularly egregious given the defendant's aforementioned involvement with children and will be seeking a sentencing enhancement."

The part-giant fiddled with his beard, looking uncomfortable in conventional wizard dress. But subsided under his attorney's expression, who then introduced herself "Strikes me as putting the thestral before the cart, Your Honor, when we as yet lack a guilty verdict. Andromeda Black Tonks for the defense."

"Very well." The judge acknowledged with a little nod "A warning to the audience; my courtroom is not a circus; nor is it a celebrity autograph forum. I have no compunction filling Ministry holding cells to maintain order; consider this your sole warning. Mr. Selwyn? Your opening?"

The prosecutor spoke at length, but precisely "Your Honor, this case might have been a simple matter of unauthorized magic. But what came out of the investigation was a shock, even for one of my long career. I am not speaking from hyperbole when I say that some of our most deeply held assumptions of recent history will be put to the test."

"Thank you." Said the judge without emotion "And the defense?"

After a formal bow, Andromeda said "I'll reserve until our presentation, judge."

Abcij

"A most thorough and detailed case, Mr. Selwyn." Said Crockford after 6 days and 33 witnesses testified. Every student in the class, plus both current and former professors offering expert opinions. It wasn't quite noticeable she was bored out of her mind. She glanced at the defense and asked the formal question "Mrs. Tonks, are you prepared?"

Nodding, Andromeda spoke with clear irony "I do thank my learned colleague for providing me with both time and an abundance of material from which to draw. I do believe that I can condense our case by a fair bit. Do we deny the expert testimony that Mr. Hagrid is sometimes less than prudent with class material? No, as it is not relevant to the charges. That is something for the Hogwarts Board of Governors to address, entirely separate from this. Do we deny Mr. Hagrid used the remnants of a broken wand? No. Here, it is HIGHLY relevant to the charges, as will be made clear. And, with great respect to my opponent's extensive case, we intend to present 3: And be prepared to offer closing arguments certainly before end of day. Thank you."

"You may proceed Mrs. Tonks." Crockford gave permission. There might have been a sigh of relief, or maybe it was your imagination. "Your first witness?"

The former Black exerted the knowledge from her youth, commanding "I call Susan Bones."

"A child." Sneered Selwyn.

Andromeda sneered back and after the witness was sworn, asked "Miss Bones a short dissertation of your pedigree, then your personal qualifications please?"

"Bones, or bein, from old Norse in my case, has been part of English nobility since late Roman times." The shy young redhead who'd cheerily run to join Hufflepuff nearly a decade ago had developed into a rising powerhouse "I am currently a junior researcher and archivist for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. My aunt, being who she was, had me handling even sensitive material before I could cross the street alone. There is nothing in the files I could not find."

Crockford interjected "The court takes note of your expertise, Miss Bones. Mrs. Tonks, continue."

"Thank you Your Honor." The defense replied "Now, my client was …apparently… at least implicated in the petrification of several Hogwarts students and one death. He was expelled from Hogwarts and his wand …reportedly… broken. What is in the DMLE files on his trial?"

Looking confident but uncomfortable the witness answered "Nothing at all. Zip. Zero. Nada."

"You mean to tell me there was an arrest, at least two preliminary hearings, a bail hearing, a trial, verdict, sentencing, appeals, and the DMLE files are missing? All of them?" asked Andromeda in an incredulous tone.

Susan shook her head "No. I mean they never existed. You cannot have all that legal activity without producing paperwork. A lot of it. And even if it was later removed DMLE files would show gaps proving it was once present. No witch or wizard could get it all."

"And this has something to do with the illegal use of a snapped wand by a criminal barred from using magic?" Selwyn interjected from his seat "Never mind us relying on the alleged expertise of a child."

Both women began speaking, but Susan overrode Andromeda "You pompous arse! I could find anything on any subject anywhere in any Ministry files!"

"The witness will control herself." Ordered the judge after her wand popped loudly "And the prosecution will not speak out of turn. Mrs. Tonks? Continue."

A Black would never be obsequious, Andromeda merely nodded "Of course, Your Honor. Miss Bones, to wrap up, what is your evaluation of what you found …and did not find… in the course of your investigation?"

"I can find no record of a trial for Mr. Hagrid, or any hearings, arrest, conviction or sentencing." Said the redhead "There is no documentation ordering the snapping of his wand. As a legal matter, Mr. Hagrid has no criminal history at all."

The prosecutor stood and made a show of walking around his table before asking "This is a matter of your opinion, Miss Bones. Tell me this, does your supervisor agree with you and your …conclusions?"

"Mr. Columbus agreed to me testifying today and knew …prior to today… the substance of what I would report." She answered, stiffly.

After a theatrical sigh, he pushed "Not what I asked, young lady. Let me repeat , does your supervisor agree with you? I think we deserve to hear a simple yes or no answer."

"I would not presume to testify for what Mr. Columbus believes." The witch answered with a smirk "If you would like to know his views, Mr. Selwyn, then I recommend asking him."

Selwyn gave her a cold sneer and addressed the judge "Your Honor, I see nothing in any of the past day's proceedings to even reopen the prior case. Therefore I move for summary conviction. And I have nothing further for this witness."

"Miss Bones, you are excused." Crockford said, first, then went on ruling "I do find sufficient evidence …or, perhaps, insufficient is more appropriate… that there was little to no due process in this affair. Kindly contain your client's enthusiasm and…where do we go from this?"

Resting a hand on the giant's forearm, Andromeda answered "Simply with a little evidence of Mr. Hagrid having nothing to do with the petrifications of 1943. So, even if the basis for charging him with illegal use of magic had been a valid conviction back then. Which would beg the question why he was allowed to be around children for the subsequent half century. There is now evidence of the TRUE mastermind of …and cause of… those petrifications of 1943."

"After …as you yourself say… half a century" the prosecution was filled with disdain "what possible proof could there be today?"

Andromeda smiled with a hint of arrogance "I am more than pleased to do so. I call Harry Potter to the stand." And once he was sworn in "First a little factual information, Mr. Potter. What was the creature associated with Mr. Hagrid that was blamed for the attacks during the 1943 school year?"

"An acromantula then about the size of a cat." Harry was a rather impressive sight in full-dress-uniform.

She nodded and continued "Now, we could call in a magizoologist to confirm, but how does an acromantula kill?"

"If they get big enough, of course they can do so physically." He started with then "But it can also either spray or inject venom."

Pressing on with barely a breath "As I understand it, venom causes paralysis or burning. What were the conditions of the victims from 1943?"

"There were three magical petrifications and one death. In every case the victim was unmarked by burn or puncture wound." Harry answered.

Andromeda held up a scroll "I have in my hand the Hogwarts report from 1943 to support Mr. Potter's testimony. Copies for both the court and the prosecution. What are the causes of petrification?"

"Historically, three." Said Harry "Medusa the Gorgon and the cockatrice as well as the basilisk." He deliberately paused here according to the script they'd worked out.

Andromeda smirked, internally, springing the main attack "You have a bit of our evidence on your person. Would you please show it to both my learned opponent and the court? And identify it please."

"I would have brought a tooth or two, but that would have been seen as a weapon." Answered Harry as he produced something about the size of a dinner plate. "This is a scale from the basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets that I killed in my Second Year."

The prosecutor emitted a scornful noise, which matched his comment "Couldn't've been impressive."

"Maybe you'd care to see the carcass, Mr. Selwyn?" asked Harry silkily "I'm opening the Chamber again tomorrow so the goblins can sell it for me. Should make a few Knuts on it."

Andromeda cut in sharply "Be that as it may! Our primary focus is on Mr. Hagrid. One other associated fact, Mr. Potter, who claimed responsibility for the attacks during the 1992-1993 school year?"

"There was a message, written in blood, I think the whole school saw it. ENEMIES OF THE HEIR BEWARE. Skipping a whole lot of story, The Heir was Voldemort's claim to the title Heir of Slytherin." Answered Harry, who then lapsed into silence.

Crockford glanced at the defense, received a nod, then addressed the prosecutor "Your witness, Mr. Selwyn." When a response wasn't immediate, her wand flash/banged a couple times and she scolded "Mr. Selwyn!"

"Yes, judge." His tone a bit on edge "Our …that is… the Ministry would like to dismiss all charges. Retroactively expunge Mr. Hagrid's record. Even offer a commendation for risking this proceeding to prevent injuries to his students."

Looking down from the bench, Crockford nodded "Well, I don't necessarily think an Order of Merlin is warranted, but perhaps the trial record can be forwarded to the Minister's office for review. Case dismissed. Court adjourned." There was another flash/bang.

Only after the judge stood and stepped away from her bench, did Andromeda withdraw her restraining hand from her client's arm. Upon which, the bearded giant cheered "WHOOOOOHHHAAAAHHH! Oops, sorry there Mrs. Tonks."

"Well done there, Hagrid!" Hagrid enthused and endured a tight handshake.

Selwyn came over, shook with Andromeda and gave a formal nod "My apologies Mr. Hagrid. I was acting on what information was available. My congratulations to you and your legal team. Goodbye." With that he departed.

Abcij

"Come on Hagrid! Let me do this for you!" the young Auror was verbally prodding his giant friend a couple days later in Diagon Alley.

Only with reluctance was the giant allowing his much smaller companion to push him along "Ye nah hafta Arry. Me 'brella works ahrigh." To onlookers, the sight was rather amusing. Without causing too much of a spectacle the pair ultimately entered their destination. And with only slight damage to the doorway. "Sorry bout tha' Mist Ollivander."

"Oh nonsense!" the old wandmaker enthused and waved it off "I'll be able to charge admission through the hole Hagrid made. Well …forgive me… it was my father who sold you your wand, so I don't recall yours. You, Mr. Potter, I think everyone knows of your Holly and Phoenix feather wand. So that isn't showing off so well." His tone self-deprecating.

Harry displayed it briefly and nodded a thank you, then "You, I hope, have heard that Hagrid was cleared of all charges that led to him getting expelled."

"Hopin yah might fix me wand, sair." The part-giant pleaded. He proffered his pink umbrella containing the remnants.

Taking it, Mr. Ollivander examined it critically "Mmmmhmmm Oak … dragon heartstring… good for Transfiguration."

"I should say so." Sniggered Harry "Poor Dudders."

Ollivander sniffed haughtily "I don't know what you are talking about Mr. Potter, and kindly leave it that way. As to our patient here …ehhhh…ahhhmmm… well. Gentlemen, I will be perfectly frank, even under the best circumstances a broken wand is difficult to restore. Doing so is more costly than creating a brand new one. Your wand, Mr. Hagrid, was broken 50 years ago. Now I COULD charge you 20 times the cost, doing the absolute best of my abilities, but even the little use it has had since only further damaged an already critical patient. That it could be used at all says more for your power than its current state. My recommendation is to be to allow me to end its suffering, then have a new wand select you."

"If ye think it best. Go 'head I guess." The half-giant sniffed, wiped his nose with his beard, and sobbed.

The wandmaker headed for his back room with the umbrella "I shall return shortly."

"Can't I come?" the now crying Hagrid pleaded.

Ollivander shook his head, not without compassion but "The spells involved are for guild members only. I have sworn to die before revealing them. Even to members below journeyman rating. I assure you that I care for all wands."

"It'll be alright, mate." Harry rested a hand on the giant's forearm, both as a comfort and a restraint "Can't have Mr. Ollivander break his word."

After some minutes, the wandmaker returned to the storefront with a somber expression that ended that phase of the visit. "It's done, my friends. We can only look to the future. Mr. Hagrid? Your wand arm please? Ah-ha …hmmm…" And after a few minutes of fussing with tape-measure pulled a box from the wall "Larger than typical, but then so are you. 18½ inches. A thick American Sequoia. Dodo bird heartstring core."

"Thought they were extinct?" asked Harry. Though he forgot the question as a glow filled the store "Wow!"

Hagrid was panting in excitement "Gre Merlin Mist Vander! Tis amazing."

"Indeed. Well done. A recent acquisition of mine. Definitely appreciate our interim Minister's trade policy." Garrick was enjoying the results of this fitting "I do believe we have a match. That will be 11 Galleons."

Harry frowned, pulling out a heavy sack and grumped "Took me two hours to match and here it's the first one. And what happened to 7 Galleons?"

"I could do a lengthy dissertation on the matter, Mr. Potter." The wandmaker retorted cheerily "But the short answer to both is Inflation and I am a Senior Master of the craft."

Harry just couldn't formulate a reply to that, so he handed over the requested fee without further complaining. Besides: his friend was happy.